October 28, 2024 • 5 mins
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Like running in our diary, except we said him aloud.
We call them blogs, Paulina go, thank you so.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Much, dear blog.
Speaker 3 (00:06):
So you know, in marriage there is a thing where
you know, you got to compromise. You gotta make sure
you communicate and you talk things through. So or you
just call his mom or I call my husband's mom. No,
I don't call her a texter. Oh yeah, okay, sorry
for another day. I'm silly, but well we can get
(00:26):
to it. But my question really quick is you know,
if you're going to purchase something, right, what are kind
of like your rules around that in your relationship and
your marriage Because obviously, when I think of something, I'm like, okay,
a big purchase.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Let's just say.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Even like a car or something that's going to like
affect our finances. You know obviously how something big? I
don't know, I'm making this up. A motorcycle like something
big would be something we discussed.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
But what if it's something that's a little.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Pricey, but like you want to buy it, like what
are you supposed to like ask? So back in the day,
I used to wear not like a lot of gold,
but I used to wear like a goal shame my
mom bought it for me. I have the and polish.
You called it a budget, but I think it's called
the medallion a pendant. So I want to wear it,
but i'd have to buy the chain part, right, and
my daughter.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Got one's got the cube of Licks.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Well, he won't let me use it only. I can
only use it only through Friday because the weekends he
does his thing expense.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Yeah, well, well then I'm going to need it. I'm
gonna company paid for those Cuban List Okay, anyway, so
you need a chain, I.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
Need the chain part. But then I was like, well,
maybe I want another pendant because I would want it
to maybe be like a little different or bigger, right,
So I was like, I want to buy that. So
I got a.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Quote for it.
Speaker 3 (01:35):
How much would be at my jewelry shop that I go.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
To, and it's not cheap.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
And then on top of that, I want to exchange
my not exchange my ring, but I want to get
a gold a band. Yes, I want to get a
gold band, and I would basically just get the diamond
and put it in the gold band. And Hobby's like, well,
why didn't you tell me that in the beginning, that
you wanted gold, and I was like, because I thought
I wanted white gold, but you know, people change, people grow,
and I want gold now because I'm wearing fortes eighteen minutes.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
But I noticed.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
I'm like, well, all my stuff is gold. I have
a bracelet and g for my daughter. Then I have
my evil Eye bracelet that's gold. He bought this for me,
and I'm like, so I kind of want it all
to match, but it's kind of pricey, and I'm like,
do I just do it or do I like have
to talk about it with my partner.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Who's money is it?
Speaker 3 (02:16):
I mean, it's my money. Yeah, But then he, you know,
he scolds me. He's like, you spendy money you don't have.
It's that whole talk my mom used to give me that.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
You have the money to do this. No, not right now. Okay,
I got to move things around, but I can't.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
Oh yeah, well, why don't you ask him maybe like
as a gift, like for you know, I don't know
Christmas is coming. Why don't you say I want it
for Christmas? And then he buys it for you, and
then he probably be really happy because now he knows
what you want.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
That's true. We kind of stopped gifts giving.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
I don't know if that's a good thing or a
bad thing, but we kind of stopped because I just
felt like it was getting ridiculous and we didn't really
like we don't need to gift each other things like
we do it all the time. That makes sense, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
It's an interesting conversation because it's like, I don't know
how that.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
Would work, Like would you tell your wife? I mean,
he feel like would go and get his self. Like
he bought a rosary and he just came home with it.
This is also like three years ago. We weren't really
married yet, but he just came home with it and
it was not cheap.
Speaker 1 (03:10):
You can just go buy whatever you want, Rufio, as
long as you can still pay the bills.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
Right exactly. I mean that we don't have a joint
bank account anything like that. We don't either, So it's
if I spend whatever, I just can't complain if I
don't have Like that's like I can't I can't spend
money on that because I don't have any money right now. Yeah,
I can't complain if I buy a big purchase of something.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
If you go spend three hundred bucks on Jordan's. Then
can she go spend three hundred bucks on something else?
And then it's is that how that works?
Speaker 2 (03:38):
I don't. I don't ever.
Speaker 4 (03:39):
I don't ever tell Jess like you're spending too much
money on whatever.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
She just spends. She just buys whatever she wants. Like
I don't. I don't ever go to Jess and be like, yo,
you're buying too much. All these packages are coming in.
What is this? What is that? I don't, I don't care,
but like for me, I just feel it should be
the same way. But then I'm the one that's, oh,
you have too much of that already? Why do you
get another pair of this? Why get into the pair
of that?
Speaker 4 (04:01):
But I never tell Jess you have too many watch
more call its.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
But I like this dynamic.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
I want this because I don't get scolded for my
Amazon packages because mostly stuff for the baby. But I
get the because then I'll be like, hey, can I
get like fifty bucks for like groceries? And then it's
like what are you doing with your money? It's like
I feel like I'm being scolded, like mom and dad
are yelling at me. I don't like that because that's
how my mom used to be.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
Have you guys outlined clearly though, like here are my
responsibilities and here are yours, and then if those are
all met, then whatever you know, and here's how much
we're gonna save, and then whatever's left, then I can
spend that because I feel like that that takes some
of the ambiguity out of it, right, because it's like, Okay,
I'm gonna pay for all this stuff, and then you're
gonna pay for that stuff, and then we're gonna set
this much aside and then if there's something left.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
M hmm.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
I sound like Dave Ramsey over here. I know you
can't afford it.
Speaker 3 (04:48):
No, really, I need him to tell me that, like,
and he knew all had told me that. It's like,
it's not buying stuff that's not necessary for me. The
baby is different, but like for me, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
Have you had that conversation though, or does he just
pay everything?
Speaker 2 (04:58):
You're gonna do it?
Speaker 4 (04:59):
No?
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Right, we have that conversation.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
The bills are all paid, but I mean, yeah, some
months I'm just kind of like, can I get some money?
Can I get some money, daddy? Because it's not good.
But he he always comes through, and that's not the problem.
I just feel like it's guilty for spending money on
a chain when you know, I know that it's not
the right thing to do. That money can go somewhere else,
like to save, Like we're trying to get something done
in the backyard this summer that's gonna cost money.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
You know, I feel guilty. I think if I set
a new shirt though, that is a new shirt, and.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
I'm about to go buy some more because I like.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
How okay, you're tag right there. Do you want me
to cut it off for your love? It cut it
off for you tomorrow shout. I was wondering if that was,
like why did purpose? Like, why you still have? I
(05:51):
can't it for you?
Speaker 1 (05:53):
You need to cut that off before you go be
like is that new
Like running in our diary, except we said him aloud.
We call them blogs, Paulina go, thank you so.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Much, dear blog.
Speaker 3 (00:06):
So you know, in marriage there is a thing where
you know, you got to compromise. You gotta make sure
you communicate and you talk things through. So or you
just call his mom or I call my husband's mom. No,
I don't call her a texter. Oh yeah, okay, sorry
for another day. I'm silly, but well we can get
(00:26):
to it. But my question really quick is you know,
if you're going to purchase something, right, what are kind
of like your rules around that in your relationship and
your marriage Because obviously, when I think of something, I'm like, okay,
a big purchase.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Let's just say.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Even like a car or something that's going to like
affect our finances. You know obviously how something big? I
don't know, I'm making this up. A motorcycle like something
big would be something we discussed.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
But what if it's something that's a little.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Pricey, but like you want to buy it, like what
are you supposed to like ask? So back in the day,
I used to wear not like a lot of gold,
but I used to wear like a goal shame my
mom bought it for me. I have the and polish.
You called it a budget, but I think it's called
the medallion a pendant. So I want to wear it,
but i'd have to buy the chain part, right, and
my daughter.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Got one's got the cube of Licks.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Well, he won't let me use it only. I can
only use it only through Friday because the weekends he
does his thing expense.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Yeah, well, well then I'm going to need it. I'm
gonna company paid for those Cuban List Okay, anyway, so
you need a chain, I.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
Need the chain part. But then I was like, well,
maybe I want another pendant because I would want it
to maybe be like a little different or bigger, right,
So I was like, I want to buy that. So
I got a.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Quote for it.
Speaker 3 (01:35):
How much would be at my jewelry shop that I go.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
To, and it's not cheap.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
And then on top of that, I want to exchange
my not exchange my ring, but I want to get
a gold a band. Yes, I want to get a
gold band, and I would basically just get the diamond
and put it in the gold band. And Hobby's like, well,
why didn't you tell me that in the beginning, that
you wanted gold, and I was like, because I thought
I wanted white gold, but you know, people change, people grow,
and I want gold now because I'm wearing fortes eighteen minutes.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
But I noticed.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
I'm like, well, all my stuff is gold. I have
a bracelet and g for my daughter. Then I have
my evil Eye bracelet that's gold. He bought this for me,
and I'm like, so I kind of want it all
to match, but it's kind of pricey, and I'm like,
do I just do it or do I like have
to talk about it with my partner.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Who's money is it?
Speaker 3 (02:16):
I mean, it's my money. Yeah, But then he, you know,
he scolds me. He's like, you spendy money you don't have.
It's that whole talk my mom used to give me that.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
You have the money to do this. No, not right now. Okay,
I got to move things around, but I can't.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
Oh yeah, well, why don't you ask him maybe like
as a gift, like for you know, I don't know
Christmas is coming. Why don't you say I want it
for Christmas? And then he buys it for you, and
then he probably be really happy because now he knows
what you want.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
That's true. We kind of stopped gifts giving.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
I don't know if that's a good thing or a
bad thing, but we kind of stopped because I just
felt like it was getting ridiculous and we didn't really
like we don't need to gift each other things like
we do it all the time. That makes sense, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
It's an interesting conversation because it's like, I don't know
how that.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
Would work, Like would you tell your wife? I mean,
he feel like would go and get his self. Like
he bought a rosary and he just came home with it.
This is also like three years ago. We weren't really
married yet, but he just came home with it and
it was not cheap.
Speaker 1 (03:10):
You can just go buy whatever you want, Rufio, as
long as you can still pay the bills.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
Right exactly. I mean that we don't have a joint
bank account anything like that. We don't either, So it's
if I spend whatever, I just can't complain if I
don't have Like that's like I can't I can't spend
money on that because I don't have any money right now. Yeah,
I can't complain if I buy a big purchase of something.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
If you go spend three hundred bucks on Jordan's. Then
can she go spend three hundred bucks on something else?
And then it's is that how that works?
Speaker 2 (03:38):
I don't. I don't ever.
Speaker 4 (03:39):
I don't ever tell Jess like you're spending too much
money on whatever.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
She just spends. She just buys whatever she wants. Like
I don't. I don't ever go to Jess and be like, yo,
you're buying too much. All these packages are coming in.
What is this? What is that? I don't, I don't care,
but like for me, I just feel it should be
the same way. But then I'm the one that's, oh,
you have too much of that already? Why do you
get another pair of this? Why get into the pair
of that?
Speaker 4 (04:01):
But I never tell Jess you have too many watch
more call its.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
But I like this dynamic.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
I want this because I don't get scolded for my
Amazon packages because mostly stuff for the baby. But I
get the because then I'll be like, hey, can I
get like fifty bucks for like groceries? And then it's
like what are you doing with your money? It's like
I feel like I'm being scolded, like mom and dad
are yelling at me. I don't like that because that's
how my mom used to be.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
Have you guys outlined clearly though, like here are my
responsibilities and here are yours, and then if those are
all met, then whatever you know, and here's how much
we're gonna save, and then whatever's left, then I can
spend that because I feel like that that takes some
of the ambiguity out of it, right, because it's like, Okay,
I'm gonna pay for all this stuff, and then you're
gonna pay for that stuff, and then we're gonna set
this much aside and then if there's something left.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
M hmm.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
I sound like Dave Ramsey over here. I know you
can't afford it.
Speaker 3 (04:48):
No, really, I need him to tell me that, like,
and he knew all had told me that. It's like,
it's not buying stuff that's not necessary for me. The
baby is different, but like for me, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
Have you had that conversation though, or does he just
pay everything?
Speaker 2 (04:58):
You're gonna do it?
Speaker 4 (04:59):
No?
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Right, we have that conversation.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
The bills are all paid, but I mean, yeah, some
months I'm just kind of like, can I get some money?
Can I get some money, daddy? Because it's not good.
But he he always comes through, and that's not the problem.
I just feel like it's guilty for spending money on
a chain when you know, I know that it's not
the right thing to do. That money can go somewhere else,
like to save, Like we're trying to get something done
in the backyard this summer that's gonna cost money.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
You know, I feel guilty. I think if I set
a new shirt though, that is a new shirt, and.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
I'm about to go buy some more because I like.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
How okay, you're tag right there. Do you want me
to cut it off for your love? It cut it
off for you tomorrow shout. I was wondering if that was,
like why did purpose? Like, why you still have? I
(05:51):
can't it for you?
Speaker 1 (05:53):
You need to cut that off before you go be
like is that new
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