November 7, 2024 • 6 mins
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Yeah, they talk better than they tell me about it.
These are the radio blogs on the Fred Show. It's
like a writing in our diaries, except we see them
a lot. Of course, we called them blogs.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Yes you ready, Yes, all right, I go, thank you
so much, dear blog.
Speaker 3 (00:15):
So you know, I think a lot of us can relate.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
But my mind is a is a dangerous place, and
it's a scary place.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Because I alog play the song.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
So I struggle a lot with scenarios or skits or
how are you going to phrase it? And I got
two different types, right, So the one that I have
is the what I should have said in a conversation.
And I'm in the show. We're washing my hair, you know,
doing a whole body scrub, and then I'm like, I
should have told this person.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
That that would have been so good.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
But at the moment, I don't know if I have
like a flight or what is it called the freezing?
Speaker 3 (00:52):
But I have a freeze. Okay.
Speaker 2 (00:54):
So my thing is I don't I don't fight, I
don't fight whatever.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
I just freeze. Yeah, And I wish, wish.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
Wish I wasn't like that so that I could be
more quicker sometimes, especially if you catch me off guard
then like I don't Sometimes every time, okay, well your
you're a tip, I'm sorry, what fee I'm like, oh,
like I don't know.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
I also like I don't know.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
In the moment, I'm like, well he really said that
or she really said that, and I don't know. But
then I have another thing that I do, which is
I create fake scenarios in my head when I know
something's about to happen. If let's just say, Fred, you
and I are gonna have a conversation today at ten o'clock,
I'm already like preparing what you're gonna say and how
I'm gonna respond, which my friend told me her therapist
because she does it too. Her therapist said that it's
(01:38):
because you don't like the unpredictable or something, so you're
trying to like kind of sketch it out of what
it would look like, and you should never do that,
I guess apparently, But I do it all the time
because I have an event thing that I'm going to
a thing on Sunday, and I'm already doing a skit
in my head of like how I'm gonna approach somebody,
what I'm gonna say, where I'm gonna say, like what
they're going to respond to me, Like I have a
whole skit in my head.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
See, I do the same thing.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
That problem is, Yeah, you're prepared for any outcome, but like, yeah,
I tend to get myself worked up. Yes, yes, and
I really don't even know if it's going to, you know,
get to that point, you know what I mean, Like
I don't really know what the other person's going to
say or what they feel, but then I fill it
in and then that that I just build up like
stress over the thing I've created.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Oh I'm stressed. I'm so stressed. And I guarantee, youse
you it never ends up like that too. That person's
gonna just be so corridial or just say hello or something.
And I'm over here like, oh, we're.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
About to box it out and this whole thing is
going to happen. The police are going to show up,
Like I have a whole thing in my head, but
I'm like, it's not gonna happen like that.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
But I don't know if I'm like trying to prepare
for the worst case scenario, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (02:40):
I mean, we all run things through our own filter,
so like an action happens or someone does something, and
every single person has their own filter based on, you know,
their experiences leading up to that point.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
True, so we all do that. But I do think.
Speaker 4 (02:52):
There's some port part of like my therapist has called me,
you know, a control freak before, but not in the
sense of like controlling that like what you would think.
It's like trying to control somebody's reaction to something I'm
going to do in order to be able to like
know what's going to happen, you know, like if I'm
giving someone bad news, like I can't control their reaction,
(03:13):
but I want to because I want it to go away.
That isn't, you know, bad for both of us. So
it might be a little bit.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Of both, I think.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
So someone said they do it out loud, So do I.
I live alone, so I have the full on conversation.
What's the problem is, by the Joe, I have full
on conversation out loud.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
You talk out loud?
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Oh yeah, to myself all the time all day? Well,
no voices, Uh no, that voice is in my head.
I'll say what I'm going to say out loud, yeah,
one hundred percent.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
Yeah, I mean why not? There's no one there to
hear it.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
But my problem is a by the time I get
to the actual encounter, I'm so tired from the fight
that I have with myself role playing yes that I
it's like I have no fight left in me, so
I just get walked on. I get to the thing
and it's like I'm not armed. I'm just exhausted, you know.
It's like wow. And then they say the thing. But
I'm with you too, Like I can come up with
a million things an hour later that I should.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
Have said, yes, yeah, my damn it, that would have
been so good. That would have been I want to
call them the thing again that I just came up with.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Man, and I do this thing too, where like because
there's somebody I want to text, but I don't. I
feel like the response to me isn't gonna be nice,
so I'm like avoiding that even though I don't know.
My therapist will say, well, you don't know that, Paulina,
you don't know what the response is going to be,
and like also, I'm just thinking worst case scenario. But
I'm like nervous. It's on a textile because I'm just
scared I'm gonna get like my head shoot off. You know,
(04:32):
I don't know, I think too much.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
I think Where that applies to me too, is that
I have the hardest time believing that when people are
acting a certain way towards me. And I get this
advice all the time, like from my therapy, I mean,
for professionals tell me this, my friends tell me this,
Calein told me this before. It's like, so much of
the time, the way someone's acting towards you has nothing
to do with you. It is about them, Yes, But
(04:54):
then that to me is so unaccountable because I know
people who just the one of the traits that drives
me to most crazy is unaccountable people like I can't
stand people who everything is always everybody else's fault. I'm like,
if there is constant chaos in your life, if everybody
around you is the problem, at what point do you say,
(05:16):
wait a minute, hold on a second. The common denominator
here is me, So maybe I'm the problem. But what
I mean is I'll play out these scenarios and I'll
get myself all worked up about what I think someone
else is upset about, only to find out that they're
not really even upset with me at all. They're just
being an a hole because they're mad about something that
has something to do with them, you know what I mean.
So I'm with you, I play out, I use all
(05:38):
this energy towards this thing, only to then find out
when it finally does happen, it had nothing to do
with me to begin with. They were just being jerks
because they were mad about something else.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Yep. So it's a lot of ways to energy. It is.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
It is because I'm already exhausted and the thing is Sunday,
and I don't know if I'm going to make it
a Sunday.
Speaker 3 (05:56):
No, just do what I do.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
You'll be exhausted by the time you get there, and
it'll just be like I don't have anymore.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
It's left, It's fine whatever, just walk on, just walk on.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
No. But then it's like, you know, you build, build
it up, and then you get to the point and
you realize it's had nothing to do with you, and you're.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
Like, oh god, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
I spent the whole week talking to myself. I'm no
voice left. I got a bunch of great one liners
like ham and do something now waiting by the phone
in three minutes
Yeah, they talk better than they tell me about it.
These are the radio blogs on the Fred Show. It's
like a writing in our diaries, except we see them
a lot. Of course, we called them blogs.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Yes you ready, Yes, all right, I go, thank you
so much, dear blog.
Speaker 3 (00:15):
So you know, I think a lot of us can relate.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
But my mind is a is a dangerous place, and
it's a scary place.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Because I alog play the song.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
So I struggle a lot with scenarios or skits or
how are you going to phrase it? And I got
two different types, right, So the one that I have
is the what I should have said in a conversation.
And I'm in the show. We're washing my hair, you know,
doing a whole body scrub, and then I'm like, I
should have told this person.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
That that would have been so good.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
But at the moment, I don't know if I have
like a flight or what is it called the freezing?
Speaker 3 (00:52):
But I have a freeze. Okay.
Speaker 2 (00:54):
So my thing is I don't I don't fight, I
don't fight whatever.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
I just freeze. Yeah, And I wish, wish.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
Wish I wasn't like that so that I could be
more quicker sometimes, especially if you catch me off guard
then like I don't Sometimes every time, okay, well your
you're a tip, I'm sorry, what fee I'm like, oh,
like I don't know.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
I also like I don't know.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
In the moment, I'm like, well he really said that
or she really said that, and I don't know. But
then I have another thing that I do, which is
I create fake scenarios in my head when I know
something's about to happen. If let's just say, Fred, you
and I are gonna have a conversation today at ten o'clock,
I'm already like preparing what you're gonna say and how
I'm gonna respond, which my friend told me her therapist
because she does it too. Her therapist said that it's
(01:38):
because you don't like the unpredictable or something, so you're
trying to like kind of sketch it out of what
it would look like, and you should never do that,
I guess apparently, But I do it all the time
because I have an event thing that I'm going to
a thing on Sunday, and I'm already doing a skit
in my head of like how I'm gonna approach somebody,
what I'm gonna say, where I'm gonna say, like what
they're going to respond to me, Like I have a
whole skit in my head.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
See, I do the same thing.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
That problem is, Yeah, you're prepared for any outcome, but like, yeah,
I tend to get myself worked up. Yes, yes, and
I really don't even know if it's going to, you know,
get to that point, you know what I mean, Like
I don't really know what the other person's going to
say or what they feel, but then I fill it
in and then that that I just build up like
stress over the thing I've created.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Oh I'm stressed. I'm so stressed. And I guarantee, youse
you it never ends up like that too. That person's
gonna just be so corridial or just say hello or something.
And I'm over here like, oh, we're.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
About to box it out and this whole thing is
going to happen. The police are going to show up,
Like I have a whole thing in my head, but
I'm like, it's not gonna happen like that.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
But I don't know if I'm like trying to prepare
for the worst case scenario, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (02:40):
I mean, we all run things through our own filter,
so like an action happens or someone does something, and
every single person has their own filter based on, you know,
their experiences leading up to that point.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
True, so we all do that. But I do think.
Speaker 4 (02:52):
There's some port part of like my therapist has called me,
you know, a control freak before, but not in the
sense of like controlling that like what you would think.
It's like trying to control somebody's reaction to something I'm
going to do in order to be able to like
know what's going to happen, you know, like if I'm
giving someone bad news, like I can't control their reaction,
(03:13):
but I want to because I want it to go away.
That isn't, you know, bad for both of us. So
it might be a little bit.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Of both, I think.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
So someone said they do it out loud, So do I.
I live alone, so I have the full on conversation.
What's the problem is, by the Joe, I have full
on conversation out loud.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
You talk out loud?
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Oh yeah, to myself all the time all day? Well,
no voices, Uh no, that voice is in my head.
I'll say what I'm going to say out loud, yeah,
one hundred percent.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
Yeah, I mean why not? There's no one there to
hear it.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
But my problem is a by the time I get
to the actual encounter, I'm so tired from the fight
that I have with myself role playing yes that I
it's like I have no fight left in me, so
I just get walked on. I get to the thing
and it's like I'm not armed. I'm just exhausted, you know.
It's like wow. And then they say the thing. But
I'm with you too, Like I can come up with
a million things an hour later that I should.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
Have said, yes, yeah, my damn it, that would have
been so good. That would have been I want to
call them the thing again that I just came up with.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Man, and I do this thing too, where like because
there's somebody I want to text, but I don't. I
feel like the response to me isn't gonna be nice,
so I'm like avoiding that even though I don't know.
My therapist will say, well, you don't know that, Paulina,
you don't know what the response is going to be,
and like also, I'm just thinking worst case scenario. But
I'm like nervous. It's on a textile because I'm just
scared I'm gonna get like my head shoot off. You know,
(04:32):
I don't know, I think too much.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
I think Where that applies to me too, is that
I have the hardest time believing that when people are
acting a certain way towards me. And I get this
advice all the time, like from my therapy, I mean,
for professionals tell me this, my friends tell me this,
Calein told me this before. It's like, so much of
the time, the way someone's acting towards you has nothing
to do with you. It is about them, Yes, But
(04:54):
then that to me is so unaccountable because I know
people who just the one of the traits that drives
me to most crazy is unaccountable people like I can't
stand people who everything is always everybody else's fault. I'm like,
if there is constant chaos in your life, if everybody
around you is the problem, at what point do you say,
(05:16):
wait a minute, hold on a second. The common denominator
here is me, So maybe I'm the problem. But what
I mean is I'll play out these scenarios and I'll
get myself all worked up about what I think someone
else is upset about, only to find out that they're
not really even upset with me at all. They're just
being an a hole because they're mad about something that
has something to do with them, you know what I mean.
So I'm with you, I play out, I use all
(05:38):
this energy towards this thing, only to then find out
when it finally does happen, it had nothing to do
with me to begin with. They were just being jerks
because they were mad about something else.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Yep. So it's a lot of ways to energy. It is.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
It is because I'm already exhausted and the thing is Sunday,
and I don't know if I'm going to make it
a Sunday.
Speaker 3 (05:56):
No, just do what I do.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
You'll be exhausted by the time you get there, and
it'll just be like I don't have anymore.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
It's left, It's fine whatever, just walk on, just walk on.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
No. But then it's like, you know, you build, build
it up, and then you get to the point and
you realize it's had nothing to do with you, and you're.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
Like, oh god, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
I spent the whole week talking to myself. I'm no
voice left. I got a bunch of great one liners
like ham and do something now waiting by the phone
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