April 14, 2025 • 16 mins
Laina is conflicted after planning a girls trip without one of her best friends because she always brings her baby everywhere. The friend is now mad at her over the decision, find out what the crew has to say!
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Order. It's a fresh show. It's Kiki's court, all right,
the honorable kikilik Kiki.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
But Judge Kiki, yes, I take it away, all right, now,
let's get into the courtroom.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
The gabble has been hit.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
It says, hey, Ki Ki, am I wrong for telling
my best friend we don't want her around because of
her baby. My name is Elena, and one of my
best friends became a mom eleven months ago, and obviously
our friend group has been so happy for her. However,
we all secretly feel like she's allowed motherhood to completely
take over her entire personality. She brings the baby everywhere
(00:36):
we go, and all the baby does is cry.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
It's so exhausting.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
She's also breastfeeding, so when we're out, she doesn't drink
and then complains if we drink without her. So we
have our annual spring break girls trip coming up, but
my friends and I have decided that we don't want
her to come. We've already booked our trip and started
a separate group chat, but she just texts us all
to x about the plans. I responded and told her
(01:03):
the truth about us not wanting her to tag along
because of the baby. We all want a kid free vibe.
She just doesn't fit the vibe anymore. So she got
really upset and removed herself from the group chat and
blocked me.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
Am I wrong for being honest? And am I wrong
for how I feel?
Speaker 1 (01:18):
So this woman the friend group wants to have like
a like a freakom girls trip, yes, like the Cobbo
San Lucas or whatever, and I don't know whatever it's.
And someone wants to come and bring the baby. Yes,
I know what, say you though, I'm sorry.
Speaker 4 (01:35):
I feel a certain kind of way about this. But
there's a time and a place.
Speaker 3 (01:38):
Are you saying the mom is wrong for wanting to
bring the baby?
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Yes to a girl's weekend? But look, there's a time
and a place. Are we going to Wisconsin Dell's?
Speaker 4 (01:48):
You know? Are are we going to?
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Know?
Speaker 4 (01:51):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Is it something that's kid friendly or is it something
that's intended to be for adults?
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Okay, Well, here's the thing. I don't feel like she's wrong, right, Lena.
I don't feel like you're wrong for wanting a girl
a kid free weekend.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Yes, I don't feel like you're wrong for.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
Maybe being a little annoyed with your friend and how
she brings the baby everywhere.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
You're allowed to feel how you feel.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
But you are wrong for planning the annual girls trip
that you know she usually comes on, and then just
removing it, like starting a separate group chat.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
That's very shady.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
And you guys booked the whole trip, didn't tell her,
and then she reaches out to ask about the trip,
and then you just throw that on her, like we
didn't want you to come because of your baby.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
But you couldn't given her the option. The president has
been set. This woman will not go anywhere without her child.
So I suppose you could one more time go back
to the well and say, hey, we're planning the girl's trip. However,
no kids on this thing, and then she could throw
a fed again.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
But at least you told her. Because now if i'm
your friend, I feel like you move in shady. Why
y'all got a separate group chat without me? Why would
I ask about the trip it's already.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
Booked because you're the lady who wants so we know
what we'll plan something else, I guess at the McDonald's
play place for you. I'm not trying to be mean,
I'm really not, but I mean to me. I'm not though,
I really don't. I do not believe that. The look,
my mom and my dad went on trips that didn't
include us, Yes, because it was a different kind of trip,
(03:18):
you know what I mean. There were adult trips, there
were girls trips. There's guys trips, and there's family trips.
It's either I think you pick a destination everybody brings
their kids, it's a whole different vibe. Or if it's
a girl's trip, we're gonna sit, you know, by the
pool and drink margaritas or whatever, then then there doesn't
need to be a baby there because they're not bringing
their babies exactly.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
No, I agree with you. The baby does not need
an invite.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
But you can at least tell your friend, hey, we
are going on our usual trip. You are invited, no
kids allowed, though, you can at least say that. But
to just start another group chat without me, it's very shady.
Speaker 4 (03:52):
But it sounds like they've done that and she still
brings the kid.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
Well that's true.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
Yeah, So I don't know what you're supposed to do.
How do you tell your friendly like I don't want
to be around your baby? Like why your baby always crying.
She said, the baby is always crying, and thats off.
Speaker 5 (04:06):
You can you can tell your friends like, hey, you know,
I kind of want this to be like a girl's
thing or just be like our own thing.
Speaker 3 (04:13):
And I don't think that's bad.
Speaker 5 (04:14):
And as a mother of a twelve month old, so
very close to this girl situation, I have a lot
to unpack here, and I think I want to start
with saying that just because I had a baby doesn't
mean that life has to change for everybody else around me.
Speaker 3 (04:27):
I've changed my own life. I'm very well aware of that.
Speaker 5 (04:30):
I am so happy with my choice, and therefore I'm
not going to affect your trip and your trip if
we're all going in a girl's trip, like this is
our set thing, we do this every year, whatever it is, Like,
if I can't go, then I say my ass home
and I can't go if I'm not comfortable leaving my baby,
that's okay, And as friends, I expect you guys to
be okay with that, which just sounds like the girls
would be if we have no choice. Really, but that's
(04:50):
like where I'm at, Like, okay, if I'm staying home,
staying home, I can't do everything anymore.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
And that's okay, But how many times fallowing in it
do your friends have to ask you to do something
that you bring the baby before they decide it's we
can't ask anymore, like because it's it's a fight every
time and you're not getting it. You're not getting that
there's a time and a place for that. There's a
time and a place for this.
Speaker 3 (05:11):
One hundred percent agree.
Speaker 5 (05:12):
And I don't think babies belong everywhere, and that's me
being a mom. But I also do have a lot
of help, so I know that I comes from like
a privileged position by saying like I can't meet you
guys out for you know, Margarite's on Friday. I'm gonna
leave my baby with either dad or grandma whoever. Right,
I have the village. I'm so aware of that. But
at the same time, it's like, I don't know. I
shouldn't have to be told by you guys like I
can read the room. I should be able to read
(05:33):
the room to be like, Okay, this is a girl's trip,
Like no baby on the boob on this one, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 4 (05:38):
You have a lot of.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Self awareness about this, police, Yeah, I do, and it
doesn't sound like this woman does. And I understand that
she's dedicated to being a parent and she wants to
be with her baby, and maybe she doesn't have access
to as consistent of childcare or a lot of things.
I understand all that. But that might mean then that
she doesn't get to do everything anymore, and that's the shame.
But you chose to have a kid, and and so
(05:59):
you either that's it's an extra step for you, and
I acknowledge that it's an extra step for you, but
it is, yeah, and it's a step I might have
to take, or maybe I do. You know, that's another thing.
I don't know how many of these other girls have kids.
They're not bringing their kids, which means they have the
same burden.
Speaker 6 (06:13):
I still think you go about it, like Keeky said,
the proper channels so you can feel good about yourself.
So even in the long thing, Hey, we're planning this trip,
you know, and then you say, oh, whatever her name is, Hey, Maya,
I'm so sorry if you can't come because of the baby.
We totally understand you will be missed. That's a nice
way of saying, your baby's not coming, you have to
stay home.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
Will miss you and you're not being shady about it. Yeah,
and she wants to be invited.
Speaker 5 (06:37):
I'm as a mother, like, we want to be invited,
even if you know, like Okay, Paulina probably can't go,
like she's got the baby.
Speaker 3 (06:43):
You know, she's not.
Speaker 5 (06:43):
Gonna leave whatever. At least I want to get that
invite and feel included FaceTime. You want what else you know,
But from the mother's perspective, we have to be okay.
What's staying back and saying Okay, this isn't for me.
Speaker 4 (06:52):
You do, and I don't think this woman is.
Speaker 1 (06:54):
She's proven that, so I guess I don't know how
many times I have to ask my friend to go
to something the baby shows up before I'm like okay,
he or she's just not getting it and I'm sorry
about that, but like this is a adult's only trip. Yeah,
And I can no longer run the risk of fighting
with you about this. I think Hey, eight five five
(07:16):
three five, I'd love you guys are the Jerry.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
I'd love to know what you think. Hey, Kate, Hi,
how are you hi? Ky?
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Good morning? So what do you think Kiki's court? Essentially,
there's a woman who's part of a friend group that
brings her kid to everything.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
Her baby, and the friends.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
Are like, look, we're gonna it's it's gone on long enough.
We're going on an adult's all girls trip. We don't
want the baby there, so they kind of have planned
this whole thing without her.
Speaker 7 (07:37):
What do you think, Well, I have two toddlers of
my own. Number one, if I'm going on a girl's trip,
the toddlers for not coming.
Speaker 4 (07:45):
With yeah, I mean yeah.
Speaker 7 (07:50):
And honestly, like I wait for my friends to say, like, oh,
the baby is welcome, the kids are welcome to come.
I don't automatically assume my children are invited to everything.
And I love my kids very much, but I don't
want them there all the time. This mom needs to
like rooms exactly like Paulina said, you can't bring your
(08:10):
baby everywhere.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
I'm sorry, Yeah, no, I think I think you're right.
Speaker 4 (08:13):
Thank you, Kate, thank you?
Speaker 5 (08:16):
Or husband, like sometimes I don't want to hang out
with your husband and your boyfriend, like leave them at
home too.
Speaker 4 (08:20):
I don't think that's any difference.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
I don't think that's any different than the girl or
the guy that can't go anywhere without their significant other.
It's like, no, he or she is not invited on
this trip. It is not. It is a guy's trip
or a girl's trip. And if you then decide I'm
bringing my wife or girlfriend, well, first of all, that's
going to be weird if the rest of us don't,
or then all of a sudden, it becomes a whole
different kind of trip. Which I think there's a time
(08:42):
and a place for both.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
I agree.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
I think there's a time for us all to go
somewhere that's kid friendly together. I think there's a time
for us all to go somewhere to get hammered and
not have to worry about the kid or you not
being being limited as to what you can do because
you got to watch the kid or whatever like, because
it does kind of if the intention of the trip
is for girls to go and have a good time
and be a little irresponsible, then it does kind of
(09:04):
put a damper on that.
Speaker 4 (09:05):
And I don't think that's fair.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
And you know what I feel Lena in this, because
you can even say she told her friend like, hey,
we don't want the baby to come this time. If
Lena looks up the resort and kids are allowed, she
might still say, hey, I'm bringing her anyway, and then
when I hang out with you guys, I just believe
the baby with the nanny or with with my husband whatever.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
And now it's a family trip.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
So I understand Lena's in a tough spot, but I
feel like not telling your friend about the trip at
all is just a little shady.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
Let me see here, I'm going to throw all the texts.
As long as they have times where she can bring
her baby, I think it's completely fine for this trip
to be kid free. However, if they're really her friends,
they should carve out time for her to bring her baby.
Speaker 4 (09:41):
No, they shouldn't. No, they shouldn't.
Speaker 5 (09:43):
I think they mean like other times, like let's go
to brunch, bring the baby next Friday.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
It sounds like you just invite her somewhere in the
baby comes, so they don't have to carve out time.
It's just this particular trip, we're not doing that. Hey, Emily, Hi, Emily, Hi, Hey,
good morning. What say you?
Speaker 8 (10:00):
What if the mom is a single mom and she
doesn't have any care.
Speaker 4 (10:03):
For the baby, that's hey, look and I hear that.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
But this may not be the trip for her then,
and that's a shame, absolutely right.
Speaker 8 (10:14):
I'm just saying the friends need to consider that as well,
and Leanna didn't put that in the letter.
Speaker 4 (10:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
No, I don't like the whole isolation thing. But again,
I'll say it one more time. How many times you
ask someone or express your needs as a friend group
and they're ignored Before it's like, well, we can't pause
our lives because this one person can't do the thing
that we all want to do. I mean, at what
point do you do you just sort of do it separately?
Speaker 8 (10:40):
Yeah, I just, yeah, I agree. I was a single
mom at one point and so I was able to
figure things out and I had care. But yes, you
shouldn't be bringing your baby everywhere. Mom needs mom time.
I just it's just a different approach potentially to think
about things that maybe you could include her in and
have that kind of station versus exclusion.
Speaker 4 (11:01):
It's a very different vibe, Emily.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
When I'm at the signor frogs in Cotameto and they're pouring,
you know, shots in my mouth that everyone else's mouth
has been attached to you, and yeah, there's a baby
with a bottle next to me, it's a different vibe.
Speaker 4 (11:14):
We can't have this, It's totally.
Speaker 8 (11:16):
A different vibe.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
I agree, Emily, don't fort my fun have a good
day than trying to turn up over here and there's
a baby crying going on.
Speaker 3 (11:29):
Get rid of the baby.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
It's like the Hangover movie with the baby. What is
this baby doing here? Hey Carlos, Hey, what's going on?
Hey Carlos?
Speaker 4 (11:37):
Hey? Man? What do you? What say you in Kiki's cord?
Speaker 9 (11:41):
Listen, man, I say she's got a kick rocks.
Speaker 4 (11:43):
Listen.
Speaker 9 (11:43):
We do and we gotta, we gotta. We do a
family like a friends giving every year. You know, we
do a friend's trip as well. Every year, you know,
a bunch of couples go to get together, get a dinner,
or we do or we do a trip as well.
And you know, it started coming as okay, there's no
kids involved. We were pretty you know, specific on there
are no kids invited until one of us.
Speaker 4 (12:03):
You know, we're we're old.
Speaker 9 (12:04):
I'm forty four years old, so we have older kids now,
you know, so I have a twenty five year old,
my my wife has a.
Speaker 4 (12:09):
Twenty seven year old. You know, so we we're we're older.
Speaker 9 (12:11):
And so they started one one couple started bringing their
child because she was twenty three, and I was like, what.
Speaker 4 (12:16):
Is going on.
Speaker 9 (12:17):
My daughter's out of here. We tell them they beat it,
you know, And so so we had to specifically state
in our imitations now no offsprings, because it's just, you know,
we just don't allow me. I don't care if you're
an adult. You know, we talk about things that we
shouldn't be talking about around our children and makes our
children uncomfortable. We all pop dummies and we walk in
the door.
Speaker 3 (12:36):
You know, it's one of those that get having fun.
Speaker 9 (12:40):
I don't be freaky to say no diddy stuff.
Speaker 4 (12:42):
You know.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
You guys, are you guys switching partners or something?
Speaker 4 (12:46):
What sort of established what sort of group business? And
are you accepting new members?
Speaker 8 (12:51):
Right?
Speaker 9 (12:52):
Yeah, I don't play well with others, so no, you know,
it's it's just it's something we talk about. You know.
There's things that you know, even though they're adults, there's
just certain things they shouldn't it shouldn't here or shouldn't
hear their mother's friends talking about, you know, and it's
just that this is the rule, and it's no kids,
we're having a good time, We're gonna get wasted. We
only do this once a year, so we're gonna have
We're gonna we're gonna let loose, you know, So I
say she's got to kick rocks.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
I think that is I think I think the kick
rocks is aggressive. But I think I agree with what
you're saying. Carlos, thank you, have a good day.
Speaker 3 (13:19):
Now run a hang with Carlon.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
I do too, and I would like to see what
they're up to. Hey Brittany, Oh good morning, Hey Brittany.
So you bring up a good point. Kiki's court. It's
a it's a group of friends. One always brings her
baby and they're getting tired of it. So as supposed
to fighting about it, they've kind of branched off and
they're planning a girl's trip without her and kind of
(13:42):
leaving her out of the planning process.
Speaker 4 (13:43):
But what do you think?
Speaker 10 (13:45):
Yeah, so my thing is is an annual trip and
they do it every year. My thing is, you know,
because they do say that you lose friends and you
become a mom.
Speaker 4 (13:53):
And that's why I just.
Speaker 10 (13:54):
Kind of like upset me when to hear like their
thoughts on it. They both could have went about it
a different way. My thing is, what if the mother
was like, oh, you know, this is our annual trip.
What if like she had a sitter lined up and
this is her had like her first time away from
the baby. And you know, I mean, because I assume
would be that obviously you're going on a girls trip.
(14:16):
I would not bring a baby to that. It's different
from like they were going out to lunch or it's
like we're just getting together at home. But you know,
they didn't even say like hey, like you know, like
just wanting to ask like are you gonna still going
to come with us? You know, they didn't even take
it into consideration. They just find it without her. So
I totally understand where she's coming from and being upset.
(14:36):
I would be upset too if somebody didn't include me.
Speaker 1 (14:38):
Yeah, yeah, and pretty I hear you, and I agree
with that. I gotta believe them. We don't know this,
but I'm just I'm of the mindset that these folks
are only doing this now because it's a fight every time.
Speaker 4 (14:50):
I gotta think this is a lie.
Speaker 1 (14:51):
If this is just a one time deal she had
a baby and that we're not inviting her anymore. But
we don't know did these other girls have kids? Are
these other women having to accommodate for the kids. I mean,
you know have in the past, have you made suggestions like, well,
why don't you leave your baby with my babysitter or
with my husband or with my you know, my mom
will watch both.
Speaker 4 (15:10):
Of them so we can go.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
We don't know any of this, but I'd like to
believe that if I start not being invited to things,
it's because I simply won't adjust.
Speaker 4 (15:18):
I'd like to believe that's the case.
Speaker 10 (15:20):
Right, right, right, But for this specific events, sinsitive annually
go every heere. I would have just brought it up
to him and like, do you still want to be included?
Are you going to have a sitter? Like, just so
we can plan accordingly. But I mean they didn't even
get rid of the options. So it was a miscommunication
on both and they both communicated.
Speaker 1 (15:38):
I get it, I get it. Thank you so much, Brittany.
Have a good day.
Speaker 4 (15:42):
You're welcome. Glad you called. I don't know, case closed.
What do you think? Man, you're the.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
Judge, Lena, listen you you are right to not want
that baby around.
Speaker 3 (15:50):
Some people don't want to hear it.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
I do.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
I want to hit that crying. How happened?
Speaker 2 (15:54):
This is your friend. You could have text her and
let her know about the trip.
Speaker 4 (15:58):
Man.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
It's when I found out my friends got separate group
chats behind my back.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
You shady forever to me. Mm hmm, yeah, I agree.
Put me in a group chat, man.
Speaker 4 (16:06):
Cancel the reservation at Chippendale. Can't come now. No baby's
a lot in there. No babies. They don't need to be.
They're not ready to be seeing what happens in that thing,
you know, it gets wild
Order. It's a fresh show. It's Kiki's court, all right,
the honorable kikilik Kiki.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
But Judge Kiki, yes, I take it away, all right, now,
let's get into the courtroom.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
The gabble has been hit.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
It says, hey, Ki Ki, am I wrong for telling
my best friend we don't want her around because of
her baby. My name is Elena, and one of my
best friends became a mom eleven months ago, and obviously
our friend group has been so happy for her. However,
we all secretly feel like she's allowed motherhood to completely
take over her entire personality. She brings the baby everywhere
(00:36):
we go, and all the baby does is cry.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
It's so exhausting.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
She's also breastfeeding, so when we're out, she doesn't drink
and then complains if we drink without her. So we
have our annual spring break girls trip coming up, but
my friends and I have decided that we don't want
her to come. We've already booked our trip and started
a separate group chat, but she just texts us all
to x about the plans. I responded and told her
(01:03):
the truth about us not wanting her to tag along
because of the baby. We all want a kid free vibe.
She just doesn't fit the vibe anymore. So she got
really upset and removed herself from the group chat and
blocked me.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
Am I wrong for being honest? And am I wrong
for how I feel?
Speaker 1 (01:18):
So this woman the friend group wants to have like
a like a freakom girls trip, yes, like the Cobbo
San Lucas or whatever, and I don't know whatever it's.
And someone wants to come and bring the baby. Yes,
I know what, say you though, I'm sorry.
Speaker 4 (01:35):
I feel a certain kind of way about this. But
there's a time and a place.
Speaker 3 (01:38):
Are you saying the mom is wrong for wanting to
bring the baby?
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Yes to a girl's weekend? But look, there's a time
and a place. Are we going to Wisconsin Dell's?
Speaker 4 (01:48):
You know? Are are we going to?
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Know?
Speaker 4 (01:51):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Is it something that's kid friendly or is it something
that's intended to be for adults?
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Okay, Well, here's the thing. I don't feel like she's wrong, right, Lena.
I don't feel like you're wrong for wanting a girl
a kid free weekend.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Yes, I don't feel like you're wrong for.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
Maybe being a little annoyed with your friend and how
she brings the baby everywhere.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
You're allowed to feel how you feel.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
But you are wrong for planning the annual girls trip
that you know she usually comes on, and then just
removing it, like starting a separate group chat.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
That's very shady.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
And you guys booked the whole trip, didn't tell her,
and then she reaches out to ask about the trip,
and then you just throw that on her, like we
didn't want you to come because of your baby.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
But you couldn't given her the option. The president has
been set. This woman will not go anywhere without her child.
So I suppose you could one more time go back
to the well and say, hey, we're planning the girl's trip. However,
no kids on this thing, and then she could throw
a fed again.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
But at least you told her. Because now if i'm
your friend, I feel like you move in shady. Why
y'all got a separate group chat without me? Why would
I ask about the trip it's already.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
Booked because you're the lady who wants so we know
what we'll plan something else, I guess at the McDonald's
play place for you. I'm not trying to be mean,
I'm really not, but I mean to me. I'm not though,
I really don't. I do not believe that. The look,
my mom and my dad went on trips that didn't
include us, Yes, because it was a different kind of trip,
(03:18):
you know what I mean. There were adult trips, there
were girls trips. There's guys trips, and there's family trips.
It's either I think you pick a destination everybody brings
their kids, it's a whole different vibe. Or if it's
a girl's trip, we're gonna sit, you know, by the
pool and drink margaritas or whatever, then then there doesn't
need to be a baby there because they're not bringing
their babies exactly.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
No, I agree with you. The baby does not need
an invite.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
But you can at least tell your friend, hey, we
are going on our usual trip. You are invited, no
kids allowed, though, you can at least say that. But
to just start another group chat without me, it's very shady.
Speaker 4 (03:52):
But it sounds like they've done that and she still
brings the kid.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
Well that's true.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
Yeah, So I don't know what you're supposed to do.
How do you tell your friendly like I don't want
to be around your baby? Like why your baby always crying.
She said, the baby is always crying, and thats off.
Speaker 5 (04:06):
You can you can tell your friends like, hey, you know,
I kind of want this to be like a girl's
thing or just be like our own thing.
Speaker 3 (04:13):
And I don't think that's bad.
Speaker 5 (04:14):
And as a mother of a twelve month old, so
very close to this girl situation, I have a lot
to unpack here, and I think I want to start
with saying that just because I had a baby doesn't
mean that life has to change for everybody else around me.
Speaker 3 (04:27):
I've changed my own life. I'm very well aware of that.
Speaker 5 (04:30):
I am so happy with my choice, and therefore I'm
not going to affect your trip and your trip if
we're all going in a girl's trip, like this is
our set thing, we do this every year, whatever it is, Like,
if I can't go, then I say my ass home
and I can't go if I'm not comfortable leaving my baby,
that's okay, And as friends, I expect you guys to
be okay with that, which just sounds like the girls
would be if we have no choice. Really, but that's
(04:50):
like where I'm at, Like, okay, if I'm staying home,
staying home, I can't do everything anymore.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
And that's okay, But how many times fallowing in it
do your friends have to ask you to do something
that you bring the baby before they decide it's we
can't ask anymore, like because it's it's a fight every
time and you're not getting it. You're not getting that
there's a time and a place for that. There's a
time and a place for this.
Speaker 3 (05:11):
One hundred percent agree.
Speaker 5 (05:12):
And I don't think babies belong everywhere, and that's me
being a mom. But I also do have a lot
of help, so I know that I comes from like
a privileged position by saying like I can't meet you
guys out for you know, Margarite's on Friday. I'm gonna
leave my baby with either dad or grandma whoever. Right,
I have the village. I'm so aware of that. But
at the same time, it's like, I don't know. I
shouldn't have to be told by you guys like I
can read the room. I should be able to read
(05:33):
the room to be like, Okay, this is a girl's trip,
Like no baby on the boob on this one, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 4 (05:38):
You have a lot of.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Self awareness about this, police, Yeah, I do, and it
doesn't sound like this woman does. And I understand that
she's dedicated to being a parent and she wants to
be with her baby, and maybe she doesn't have access
to as consistent of childcare or a lot of things.
I understand all that. But that might mean then that
she doesn't get to do everything anymore, and that's the shame.
But you chose to have a kid, and and so
(05:59):
you either that's it's an extra step for you, and
I acknowledge that it's an extra step for you, but
it is, yeah, and it's a step I might have
to take, or maybe I do. You know, that's another thing.
I don't know how many of these other girls have kids.
They're not bringing their kids, which means they have the
same burden.
Speaker 6 (06:13):
I still think you go about it, like Keeky said,
the proper channels so you can feel good about yourself.
So even in the long thing, Hey, we're planning this trip,
you know, and then you say, oh, whatever her name is, Hey, Maya,
I'm so sorry if you can't come because of the baby.
We totally understand you will be missed. That's a nice
way of saying, your baby's not coming, you have to
stay home.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
Will miss you and you're not being shady about it. Yeah,
and she wants to be invited.
Speaker 5 (06:37):
I'm as a mother, like, we want to be invited,
even if you know, like Okay, Paulina probably can't go,
like she's got the baby.
Speaker 3 (06:43):
You know, she's not.
Speaker 5 (06:43):
Gonna leave whatever. At least I want to get that
invite and feel included FaceTime. You want what else you know,
But from the mother's perspective, we have to be okay.
What's staying back and saying Okay, this isn't for me.
Speaker 4 (06:52):
You do, and I don't think this woman is.
Speaker 1 (06:54):
She's proven that, so I guess I don't know how
many times I have to ask my friend to go
to something the baby shows up before I'm like okay,
he or she's just not getting it and I'm sorry
about that, but like this is a adult's only trip. Yeah,
And I can no longer run the risk of fighting
with you about this. I think Hey, eight five five
(07:16):
three five, I'd love you guys are the Jerry.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
I'd love to know what you think. Hey, Kate, Hi,
how are you hi? Ky?
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Good morning? So what do you think Kiki's court? Essentially,
there's a woman who's part of a friend group that
brings her kid to everything.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
Her baby, and the friends.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
Are like, look, we're gonna it's it's gone on long enough.
We're going on an adult's all girls trip. We don't
want the baby there, so they kind of have planned
this whole thing without her.
Speaker 7 (07:37):
What do you think, Well, I have two toddlers of
my own. Number one, if I'm going on a girl's trip,
the toddlers for not coming.
Speaker 4 (07:45):
With yeah, I mean yeah.
Speaker 7 (07:50):
And honestly, like I wait for my friends to say, like, oh,
the baby is welcome, the kids are welcome to come.
I don't automatically assume my children are invited to everything.
And I love my kids very much, but I don't
want them there all the time. This mom needs to
like rooms exactly like Paulina said, you can't bring your
(08:10):
baby everywhere.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
I'm sorry, Yeah, no, I think I think you're right.
Speaker 4 (08:13):
Thank you, Kate, thank you?
Speaker 5 (08:16):
Or husband, like sometimes I don't want to hang out
with your husband and your boyfriend, like leave them at
home too.
Speaker 4 (08:20):
I don't think that's any difference.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
I don't think that's any different than the girl or
the guy that can't go anywhere without their significant other.
It's like, no, he or she is not invited on
this trip. It is not. It is a guy's trip
or a girl's trip. And if you then decide I'm
bringing my wife or girlfriend, well, first of all, that's
going to be weird if the rest of us don't,
or then all of a sudden, it becomes a whole
different kind of trip. Which I think there's a time
(08:42):
and a place for both.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
I agree.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
I think there's a time for us all to go
somewhere that's kid friendly together. I think there's a time
for us all to go somewhere to get hammered and
not have to worry about the kid or you not
being being limited as to what you can do because
you got to watch the kid or whatever like, because
it does kind of if the intention of the trip
is for girls to go and have a good time
and be a little irresponsible, then it does kind of
(09:04):
put a damper on that.
Speaker 4 (09:05):
And I don't think that's fair.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
And you know what I feel Lena in this, because
you can even say she told her friend like, hey,
we don't want the baby to come this time. If
Lena looks up the resort and kids are allowed, she
might still say, hey, I'm bringing her anyway, and then
when I hang out with you guys, I just believe
the baby with the nanny or with with my husband whatever.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
And now it's a family trip.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
So I understand Lena's in a tough spot, but I
feel like not telling your friend about the trip at
all is just a little shady.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
Let me see here, I'm going to throw all the texts.
As long as they have times where she can bring
her baby, I think it's completely fine for this trip
to be kid free. However, if they're really her friends,
they should carve out time for her to bring her baby.
Speaker 4 (09:41):
No, they shouldn't. No, they shouldn't.
Speaker 5 (09:43):
I think they mean like other times, like let's go
to brunch, bring the baby next Friday.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
It sounds like you just invite her somewhere in the
baby comes, so they don't have to carve out time.
It's just this particular trip, we're not doing that. Hey, Emily, Hi, Emily, Hi, Hey,
good morning. What say you?
Speaker 8 (10:00):
What if the mom is a single mom and she
doesn't have any care.
Speaker 4 (10:03):
For the baby, that's hey, look and I hear that.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
But this may not be the trip for her then,
and that's a shame, absolutely right.
Speaker 8 (10:14):
I'm just saying the friends need to consider that as well,
and Leanna didn't put that in the letter.
Speaker 4 (10:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
No, I don't like the whole isolation thing. But again,
I'll say it one more time. How many times you
ask someone or express your needs as a friend group
and they're ignored Before it's like, well, we can't pause
our lives because this one person can't do the thing
that we all want to do. I mean, at what
point do you do you just sort of do it separately?
Speaker 8 (10:40):
Yeah, I just, yeah, I agree. I was a single
mom at one point and so I was able to
figure things out and I had care. But yes, you
shouldn't be bringing your baby everywhere. Mom needs mom time.
I just it's just a different approach potentially to think
about things that maybe you could include her in and
have that kind of station versus exclusion.
Speaker 4 (11:01):
It's a very different vibe, Emily.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
When I'm at the signor frogs in Cotameto and they're pouring,
you know, shots in my mouth that everyone else's mouth
has been attached to you, and yeah, there's a baby
with a bottle next to me, it's a different vibe.
Speaker 4 (11:14):
We can't have this, It's totally.
Speaker 8 (11:16):
A different vibe.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
I agree, Emily, don't fort my fun have a good
day than trying to turn up over here and there's
a baby crying going on.
Speaker 3 (11:29):
Get rid of the baby.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
It's like the Hangover movie with the baby. What is
this baby doing here? Hey Carlos, Hey, what's going on?
Hey Carlos?
Speaker 4 (11:37):
Hey? Man? What do you? What say you in Kiki's cord?
Speaker 9 (11:41):
Listen, man, I say she's got a kick rocks.
Speaker 4 (11:43):
Listen.
Speaker 9 (11:43):
We do and we gotta, we gotta. We do a
family like a friends giving every year. You know, we
do a friend's trip as well. Every year, you know,
a bunch of couples go to get together, get a dinner,
or we do or we do a trip as well.
And you know, it started coming as okay, there's no
kids involved. We were pretty you know, specific on there
are no kids invited until one of us.
Speaker 4 (12:03):
You know, we're we're old.
Speaker 9 (12:04):
I'm forty four years old, so we have older kids now,
you know, so I have a twenty five year old,
my my wife has a.
Speaker 4 (12:09):
Twenty seven year old. You know, so we we're we're older.
Speaker 9 (12:11):
And so they started one one couple started bringing their
child because she was twenty three, and I was like, what.
Speaker 4 (12:16):
Is going on.
Speaker 9 (12:17):
My daughter's out of here. We tell them they beat it,
you know, And so so we had to specifically state
in our imitations now no offsprings, because it's just, you know,
we just don't allow me. I don't care if you're
an adult. You know, we talk about things that we
shouldn't be talking about around our children and makes our
children uncomfortable. We all pop dummies and we walk in
the door.
Speaker 3 (12:36):
You know, it's one of those that get having fun.
Speaker 9 (12:40):
I don't be freaky to say no diddy stuff.
Speaker 4 (12:42):
You know.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
You guys, are you guys switching partners or something?
Speaker 4 (12:46):
What sort of established what sort of group business? And
are you accepting new members?
Speaker 8 (12:51):
Right?
Speaker 9 (12:52):
Yeah, I don't play well with others, so no, you know,
it's it's just it's something we talk about. You know.
There's things that you know, even though they're adults, there's
just certain things they shouldn't it shouldn't here or shouldn't
hear their mother's friends talking about, you know, and it's
just that this is the rule, and it's no kids,
we're having a good time, We're gonna get wasted. We
only do this once a year, so we're gonna have
We're gonna we're gonna let loose, you know, So I
say she's got to kick rocks.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
I think that is I think I think the kick
rocks is aggressive. But I think I agree with what
you're saying. Carlos, thank you, have a good day.
Speaker 3 (13:19):
Now run a hang with Carlon.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
I do too, and I would like to see what
they're up to. Hey Brittany, Oh good morning, Hey Brittany.
So you bring up a good point. Kiki's court. It's
a it's a group of friends. One always brings her
baby and they're getting tired of it. So as supposed
to fighting about it, they've kind of branched off and
they're planning a girl's trip without her and kind of
(13:42):
leaving her out of the planning process.
Speaker 4 (13:43):
But what do you think?
Speaker 10 (13:45):
Yeah, so my thing is is an annual trip and
they do it every year. My thing is, you know,
because they do say that you lose friends and you
become a mom.
Speaker 4 (13:53):
And that's why I just.
Speaker 10 (13:54):
Kind of like upset me when to hear like their
thoughts on it. They both could have went about it
a different way. My thing is, what if the mother
was like, oh, you know, this is our annual trip.
What if like she had a sitter lined up and
this is her had like her first time away from
the baby. And you know, I mean, because I assume
would be that obviously you're going on a girls trip.
(14:16):
I would not bring a baby to that. It's different
from like they were going out to lunch or it's
like we're just getting together at home. But you know,
they didn't even say like hey, like you know, like
just wanting to ask like are you gonna still going
to come with us? You know, they didn't even take
it into consideration. They just find it without her. So
I totally understand where she's coming from and being upset.
(14:36):
I would be upset too if somebody didn't include me.
Speaker 1 (14:38):
Yeah, yeah, and pretty I hear you, and I agree
with that. I gotta believe them. We don't know this,
but I'm just I'm of the mindset that these folks
are only doing this now because it's a fight every time.
Speaker 4 (14:50):
I gotta think this is a lie.
Speaker 1 (14:51):
If this is just a one time deal she had
a baby and that we're not inviting her anymore. But
we don't know did these other girls have kids? Are
these other women having to accommodate for the kids. I mean,
you know have in the past, have you made suggestions like, well,
why don't you leave your baby with my babysitter or
with my husband or with my you know, my mom
will watch both.
Speaker 4 (15:10):
Of them so we can go.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
We don't know any of this, but I'd like to
believe that if I start not being invited to things,
it's because I simply won't adjust.
Speaker 4 (15:18):
I'd like to believe that's the case.
Speaker 10 (15:20):
Right, right, right, But for this specific events, sinsitive annually
go every heere. I would have just brought it up
to him and like, do you still want to be included?
Are you going to have a sitter? Like, just so
we can plan accordingly. But I mean they didn't even
get rid of the options. So it was a miscommunication
on both and they both communicated.
Speaker 1 (15:38):
I get it, I get it. Thank you so much, Brittany.
Have a good day.
Speaker 4 (15:42):
You're welcome. Glad you called. I don't know, case closed.
What do you think? Man, you're the.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
Judge, Lena, listen you you are right to not want
that baby around.
Speaker 3 (15:50):
Some people don't want to hear it.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
I do.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
I want to hit that crying. How happened?
Speaker 2 (15:54):
This is your friend. You could have text her and
let her know about the trip.
Speaker 4 (15:58):
Man.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
It's when I found out my friends got separate group
chats behind my back.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
You shady forever to me. Mm hmm, yeah, I agree.
Put me in a group chat, man.
Speaker 4 (16:06):
Cancel the reservation at Chippendale. Can't come now. No baby's
a lot in there. No babies. They don't need to be.
They're not ready to be seeing what happens in that thing,
you know, it gets wild
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