December 15, 2025 • 15 mins
A listener is upset after her mother-in-law is blaming her for ruining Christmas because she doesn't want to drive 6 hours to their home for the holidays with her two kids and newborn baby! Judge Keke weighs in!
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is the fread show.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Zame is taking over in Las Vegas this January for
his seven night President's Adobe Live at Park MGM. And
we've got a trip for two to the January twenty
fifth Shoke to Night Hotel State Park MGM January twenty
fourth through the twenty sixth and round trip airfare. Text
Remember to three seven three three seven now for a
chance to win. A confirmation text will be said. Standard
(00:22):
message of data rates may apply. All thanks to Live Nation.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Order a fread show.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
It's Kiki's Court Rise, the honorable out kik Alaka is here,
your honor take it away, please, all right.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
Let's get into the courtroom. The gavel has been hit,
it says Kiki. Am I wrong for ruining Christmas because
I won't travel with the newborn. I gave birth six
weeks ago after a rough delivery. I'm still healing and
have two other kids, five and three. My mother in
law insists that everyone travels six hours to her house
(00:55):
for Christmas every year, and we've taken the drive year after. However,
this year I said no because I'm dragging a new
I don't want to drag a new born and two
small kids. Across state lines during the flow season. My
husband backed me up and offered that we do a
family FaceTime call on Christmas morning instead.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
Well, my mother in law lost it.
Speaker 3 (01:19):
She said I'm being lazy and dramatic and accused me
of using the baby to control her son. Then she
sent a family group text saying Christmas was basically canceled
because some people refuse to make sacrifices. Now half of
the family is mad at me and telling me just
to deal with it for one day. And my mother
in law says I stole her Christmas and her grandkids.
Am I wrong?
Speaker 1 (01:41):
I mean, I have a lot of thoughts with Kiki A.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
True and you know, as the childless aunt, I want
to give grace to the mother in law who probably
looks forward to making memories with her grandkids every year,
like every holiday, I look forward to being around my nephews.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
I look forward to it. I'm so excited.
Speaker 3 (02:01):
I want to give I want to give grace to
the mother in law. Right, But after that, what you
have to learn as an adult is that people are
allowed to set boundaries and make decisions for their families,
and postpartum is real. And if she doesn't feel like
attending this year. Give her this year. Hopefully she doesn't
make this a new tradition where you never see your
grandkids because you threw a fit. So it's just like
(02:24):
I understand the frustration of the grandparents, and you know,
traditions are being you know broken in their opinion. But
this lady is going through postpartum. So if she doesn't
want to attend this year, give her that. That's my opinion.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
I mean, in the mode in the room, I assume
you have no dispute there. I can't think of one.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
And if she never wants to go back to see
her mother in law, I also wouldn't be mad at that.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Either, Like truly, no, not in a bad way, but like.
Speaker 4 (02:50):
She's got three kids, she's got to drag around Like
I'm barely getting around with one kid, right and my
little Nissan, Like it's a lot of work to get
around town with the kid, So I'll pack up.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Three kids go across state lines.
Speaker 4 (02:59):
No, and like, yes, she's six weeks postpartum, she's in
a diaper. Like it's a lot.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
I'm serious, it's a lot going on in her world.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
And she does not have to please anybody truly, ever, ever,
but like especially for the holiday season and Christmas, and
if mother in law feels like she wants to see
grandkids and do these memories, like maybe they could work
something out or mother in law comes over or something.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
Maybe that's a big maybe. I don't I don't know
how the situation.
Speaker 3 (03:21):
I don't want that either. Right, she's over, they want
to talk about how your house not clean?
Speaker 1 (03:26):
That's a big minute. She's sounds the kind of woman
who would do that. Yeah, should be sound great.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
Eight five five five, one oh three five. You guys
are the Jerry. I'm sure people have something to say
about this. I mean my mom, if she were listening,
she would say, my nieces are three and five, and
it's like she wants my sister to load them up
and bring them. And my sister does it a couple
of times a year. I know it's a lot of work. Granted,
my mom did it with us. So it's one of
those things where it's like, you know, grandmas want to
(03:52):
see their grandkids and and and my mom does travel
to Dallas an awful lot to see them, so it's
not like she doesn't pull her weight. My sister would
tell you, well, it's a lot of work to bring
these kids around. Well, yeah, I mean, but it's also
part of being a family. The thing for me is,
first of all, this is the third kid under five,
was it.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (04:10):
The second thing is really the proximity to birth. Like, look,
we're talking about six weeks an infant were newborn. I mean,
that's totally unreasonable to ask. Maybe in a year or two,
but I don't know why isn't mother in law jumping
a gold to where they are?
Speaker 3 (04:25):
Well, she might have offered that, but I don't think
that this daughter in law once are there either, because
think about it, if I'm in a diaper, it's probablina
saying I'm going through postpartum, I have little kids. I
don't necessarily want to host my in laws either, right,
I just want a year off to get my mind right,
get my body right, and raise these kids, and then
maybe we can pick up the tradition next year.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
If mother in law is thrown out a bunch of
scenarios that require very little from new mom, then I
might say, okay, kid, is there no compromise here? You know?
If she's if she's saying I'll fly to you, I'll
stay in a hotel. I'll stay out of your way.
I just want to see my grandkids on Christmas or
near Christmas or whatever. And she's saying no, no, No.
The problem is, I think sometimes the personalities of these
(05:08):
very eager mom grandmothers can be off putting in itself.
You know, it can come off very aggressive when they
have the best in Like my mom, I love her
to death. She has the absolute best intention, but she pushes.
And you know, she and my sister are the same
woman in many ways. So it's like you're pushing you
and you wouldn't like to be you know what I mean.
(05:29):
So it's like you're getting a no to set boundaries.
But I know you and you see that as rejection,
but yet you have the best intention. You just want
to be a part of their lives. I get all
of that for me, though it's six weeks ago you
had a baby. No, they're not going to travel to you.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
No.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
No.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
I would love to hear from the thirteen because I
struggled with this being the only girl in my family.
I don't have kids. My brothers have the kids. But
I feel like you're so used to your family tradition,
like we always get together on this day, How dare
you have to go to your other in laws? You know, like,
I don't want to share you. I don't want to
share the family. So it's hard, but you have to
just be okay with it because people are allowed to
(06:07):
set boundaries.
Speaker 2 (06:08):
Yeah, well, and you know that there was if you've
been listening for a little while years ago, there was
a it was a rough transition in our house and
my sister said, we're not coming for Christmas anymore or
Thanksgiving because we want to have our own traditions in
our own home.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
And that was hard, and it wasn't because she was wrong.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
It was hard because our family is very close that
we're used to doing things a certain way for a
long time, and that included when we were young and
our grandparents and the whole thing. So we're breaking a
multi generational tradition of being together on Christmas and as
and people have said, why don't you go to Dallas?
I wouldn't say were invited, Like, honestly, I don't. I
don't think that's I don't think that's even an option
(06:47):
because I do that, and I don't think it's a
lack of light. I think she's drawing a firm boundary. Now,
is that a boundary that I would draw that firmly. No,
I would give a little more than my is because
she is getting a lot too, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
But like just get on a plane and go there
and stay in a hotel.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
It's like, I'm not entirely sure we were included. So
you know, I think I do think there's give and take.
I think I think sometimes, you know, the burden is
on the parents to provide opportunities for the grandparents, and
then the grandparents. I think sometimes I have to show
grace to the kids when you know, but I am
(07:28):
it's a very hard thing. Family can become very complicated,
even when there's a lot of love. Hey, Dominique, Hi, Hi,
so you have a new born. Congratulations by the way,
thank you. And so you hear this scenario where you've
got to and I wonder if the mother in law
because you hear mother in law and then you automatically
like feel this disconnect, right, but not necessarily that. But
(07:52):
here's this woman, she really wants everyone together on Christmas,
and her daughter in law who just had a baby
six weeks ago, saying, nah, we're not doing this, and
she has two other kids under five, Like, I can't
do it right now, and there's there's some tension there.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
What do you think?
Speaker 5 (08:06):
Yeah, I have a three month old, I have a
three year old. And if the first six months are
so hard, especially around like flu season, RSV season, and
the holiday season on top of that, the mom and
her family should be at home with her kids, her
young ones.
Speaker 6 (08:22):
This is like.
Speaker 5 (08:23):
Primetime Stanta time for them. They should be waking up
on Christmas morning in their home, in their pajamas, with
their family. Grandma is now in law or on the
mom's side, are now extended family. So it's about the
family that you made, not the family you came from.
Now they need to be prioritized. So Grandma needs to
go to them and at least like be the community
(08:45):
that she probably claims that she is because it takes
her lab take a tribe to raise kids, especially during
the flu and holiday season.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
Yeah, I agree with at minimum, at minimum, what she's
pitching should be things that are easy on them.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
And that's so real to say. When you say you
know you are the family, what did you say the
extended family?
Speaker 1 (09:06):
You're family?
Speaker 6 (09:07):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (09:08):
Hard, but it's true, true, and my parents too.
Speaker 5 (09:12):
My my family comes over to my house because it's
about the grandkids now, it's not about anybody else. Yeah,
even with Christmas and Santa and then a new baby,
come on, yeah, what about mom and baby in the family.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
Traditions need to change.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
I think the harder you push, the less likely you
are to be included in those traditions, and that can
be hard to Dominique. Thank you so much and congratulations again.
Have a good day.
Speaker 5 (09:34):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (09:35):
You guys too.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
Glad you called. Hey Kimmy, good morning. Do it next year.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
Kimmy, Hey, Kimmy, Kimmy, kim in the radio, Kimmy. I
just I just picked up the phone. I don't know
what you were saying. You gotta you gotta start over.
Speaker 6 (09:51):
Oh I'm sorry. Okay, Well, what I'm saying is that
this lady's in the right. I just opt out a kid.
I got two other toddlers. There ain't no way I
am going six hours with a newborn to Christmas. I
am gonna tell my mother in law. I'm sorry, but
(10:11):
we're doing this next year. You all go ahead, everybody else,
go ahead, do it. I'm not offended. Please, by all means,
go ahead. I'll wait till next year and I'll see
all next year.
Speaker 1 (10:22):
Let's face time.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Yeah, yes, Kimmy, thank you so much. I'm really glad
you called. No, that's what it is. It's again six
weeks ago.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
That's uh.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
So we have Kimmy now, we have Kim Hi, kim
How you doing? I'm well, how are you doing?
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Great? Kiki's court? What say you? I when I'm not
gonna lie.
Speaker 7 (10:41):
When I heard this, this immediately really frustrated me because
I have a not technically newborn vibe a micro creamy.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
He was born at twenty five weeks.
Speaker 7 (10:51):
He was born, you know, back in May, and even
though you know he's still he's like almost seven months,
like it's still newborn kind of this and any little
cold could send him.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
To the hospital.
Speaker 7 (11:04):
So the fact that there's this judgment for you know,
wanting to keep her, the mom safe, the.
Speaker 1 (11:10):
Baby safe, is just so frustrating. How's your son doing?
By the way, he's really good.
Speaker 7 (11:15):
He's done a little bit of oxygen, but you know,
he's doing really good. But we have to be so careful,
like you can't bring them around to anybody sick. So yeah,
I just I fight for the mom in this situation.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Yeah always yeah, well, Kim, thank you, have a good day,
good holiday as well, you too.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
Love you guys, I love you too, Thanks for listening.
Appreciate it. Jackie, Hello, Hi Jackie. Kiki's court. What's your take?
Speaker 8 (11:37):
You're the jury, So no, I don't think that she's
wrong at all. I had a similar situation. I had
my daughter's July second and then my system off wedding
was the fifteenth of July, and she wanted me to
go with my daughter, and I hope her no because
I just had her, you know, and same thing. You know,
(11:59):
I would being a dress, still wearing diaper, still healing,
and she was bad, and she thought that I was
using that as an excuse not to go through her wedding.
So I sided with the mom here. She's not wrong
at all whatsoever. Especially the nurse even told us, like
before we left the hospital, she's like, make sure that
(12:19):
the baby doesn't go out, because she she they see
it a lot of times where you know, parents want
to take the baby everywhere, ends up sick, that ends
up back in the hospital, and especially with ours b
being so like serious, you know, where babies do end
up on oxygen, you know, so that can pass away
from that. I agree with her one hundred percent, Like,
just take care of her, have herhal you know, because
(12:42):
that's very important as well as a mom to heal
and not you know, like start doing stuff too early
because then you know you're gonna have all these those
dress Sure.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
Yeah, thank you guys mom here. Yeah, you call that
a good day.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
This is a good point on the text, by the way,
And I was thinking about this the other day too.
I think we give too much weight to the actual
date of the holiday. Why does it have to be
twelve twenty five? Get together in January? The kids don't care.
My family celebrated Christmas as early as the first week
of December. If that's when extended family could get together,
I guess. I guess there's it's kind of a mental thing.
Everyone else is together on this day, doing this thing,
(13:21):
posting their pictures on instag right exactly so. But I mean,
you know, I'm like, yesterday I was at the airport.
I see the airline pilots get on this thing. I'm like,
you know a lot of these guys are going to
have to work on Christmas Christmas Eve. I'm sure that
they have kids, and it's like, well, we'll just do
it when I get back, or we'll do it the
day before, or for your friends right right, because you're
rist respond exactly, he's a hobby's a firefighter.
Speaker 4 (13:42):
I'm on the radio.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
You're my first.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
So clear, this isn't off on Christmas the Paulina.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
So you're the first person I call when I need something,
So you know, fire in the house, Paulina. You know
I'm choking on something. Paulina. Hey, Teresa, Hey, high to reasons.
So Kiki's Court. Basically, we have a situation where a
mother in law wants her daughter in law and her
grandkids at Christmas, but she just gave birth six weeks
ago and she's saying no, and she's getting guilted for that.
Speaker 5 (14:13):
I think she has ever right to say no. I
gave birth my daughter, who's going to be eighteen December
twenty first, had to get released from the hospital early
because both sides of my family still expected me to
host and I did.
Speaker 7 (14:27):
This.
Speaker 8 (14:27):
Mom should be empowered and stay home.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
Yeah wow, I think my mom would tell you the
same thing. She hosted Thanksgiving. I think she had me
the next day, but she didn't know I was. I
was early, but yeah, I think the expectation was or
maybe it was, maybe it wasn't. I don't remember one
of the case. Maybe people have expectations and oh wow crazy,
that is nuts. And now it's weird that you still
won't let them come eighteen years later. But that's a whole.
Speaker 1 (14:50):
Different thing.
Speaker 6 (14:52):
From that family.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
Well, you definitely won't let them come. So there it is.
Speaker 5 (14:57):
Whether my mother in love hosts now, she's amazing.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
There you go, Theresa, thank you, have a good day,
Mary Christmas. I don't think there's I'm looking at all
these texts. There's not one counter take here. There's not
one person going.
Speaker 3 (15:12):
Well, I was looking for a boomer that would like
stand on business.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
Yeah again, where's my mom? She's in a sleep Still.
Later she'll text him and she'll think it's me, but
it's to everybody.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
Yeah I did it, but maybe I'm a mat another
one on a NIP.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
I promise you whenever the moment this is heard in Arizona,
which is going to be somewhere three or four hours
from now, I'm going to get a call.
Speaker 1 (15:38):
But you know, I'm awesome.
Speaker 6 (15:40):
I'm gonna everybody your sister again.
Speaker 4 (15:46):
It comes Frost Mom.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
She mayn't even hurt in her sleep, so you gonna
wake up now
This is the fread show.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Zame is taking over in Las Vegas this January for
his seven night President's Adobe Live at Park MGM. And
we've got a trip for two to the January twenty
fifth Shoke to Night Hotel State Park MGM January twenty
fourth through the twenty sixth and round trip airfare. Text
Remember to three seven three three seven now for a
chance to win. A confirmation text will be said. Standard
(00:22):
message of data rates may apply. All thanks to Live Nation.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Order a fread show.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
It's Kiki's Court Rise, the honorable out kik Alaka is here,
your honor take it away, please, all right.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
Let's get into the courtroom. The gavel has been hit,
it says Kiki. Am I wrong for ruining Christmas because
I won't travel with the newborn. I gave birth six
weeks ago after a rough delivery. I'm still healing and
have two other kids, five and three. My mother in
law insists that everyone travels six hours to her house
(00:55):
for Christmas every year, and we've taken the drive year after. However,
this year I said no because I'm dragging a new
I don't want to drag a new born and two
small kids. Across state lines during the flow season. My
husband backed me up and offered that we do a
family FaceTime call on Christmas morning instead.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
Well, my mother in law lost it.
Speaker 3 (01:19):
She said I'm being lazy and dramatic and accused me
of using the baby to control her son. Then she
sent a family group text saying Christmas was basically canceled
because some people refuse to make sacrifices. Now half of
the family is mad at me and telling me just
to deal with it for one day. And my mother
in law says I stole her Christmas and her grandkids.
Am I wrong?
Speaker 1 (01:41):
I mean, I have a lot of thoughts with Kiki A.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
True and you know, as the childless aunt, I want
to give grace to the mother in law who probably
looks forward to making memories with her grandkids every year,
like every holiday, I look forward to being around my nephews.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
I look forward to it. I'm so excited.
Speaker 3 (02:01):
I want to give I want to give grace to
the mother in law. Right, But after that, what you
have to learn as an adult is that people are
allowed to set boundaries and make decisions for their families,
and postpartum is real. And if she doesn't feel like
attending this year. Give her this year. Hopefully she doesn't
make this a new tradition where you never see your
grandkids because you threw a fit. So it's just like
(02:24):
I understand the frustration of the grandparents, and you know,
traditions are being you know broken in their opinion. But
this lady is going through postpartum. So if she doesn't
want to attend this year, give her that. That's my opinion.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
I mean, in the mode in the room, I assume
you have no dispute there. I can't think of one.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
And if she never wants to go back to see
her mother in law, I also wouldn't be mad at that.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Either, Like truly, no, not in a bad way, but like.
Speaker 4 (02:50):
She's got three kids, she's got to drag around Like
I'm barely getting around with one kid, right and my
little Nissan, Like it's a lot of work to get
around town with the kid, So I'll pack up.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Three kids go across state lines.
Speaker 4 (02:59):
No, and like, yes, she's six weeks postpartum, she's in
a diaper. Like it's a lot.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
I'm serious, it's a lot going on in her world.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
And she does not have to please anybody truly, ever, ever,
but like especially for the holiday season and Christmas, and
if mother in law feels like she wants to see
grandkids and do these memories, like maybe they could work
something out or mother in law comes over or something.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
Maybe that's a big maybe. I don't I don't know
how the situation.
Speaker 3 (03:21):
I don't want that either. Right, she's over, they want
to talk about how your house not clean?
Speaker 1 (03:26):
That's a big minute. She's sounds the kind of woman
who would do that. Yeah, should be sound great.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
Eight five five five, one oh three five. You guys
are the Jerry. I'm sure people have something to say
about this. I mean my mom, if she were listening,
she would say, my nieces are three and five, and
it's like she wants my sister to load them up
and bring them. And my sister does it a couple
of times a year. I know it's a lot of work. Granted,
my mom did it with us. So it's one of
those things where it's like, you know, grandmas want to
(03:52):
see their grandkids and and and my mom does travel
to Dallas an awful lot to see them, so it's
not like she doesn't pull her weight. My sister would
tell you, well, it's a lot of work to bring
these kids around. Well, yeah, I mean, but it's also
part of being a family. The thing for me is,
first of all, this is the third kid under five,
was it.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (04:10):
The second thing is really the proximity to birth. Like, look,
we're talking about six weeks an infant were newborn. I mean,
that's totally unreasonable to ask. Maybe in a year or two,
but I don't know why isn't mother in law jumping
a gold to where they are?
Speaker 3 (04:25):
Well, she might have offered that, but I don't think
that this daughter in law once are there either, because
think about it, if I'm in a diaper, it's probablina
saying I'm going through postpartum, I have little kids. I
don't necessarily want to host my in laws either, right,
I just want a year off to get my mind right,
get my body right, and raise these kids, and then
maybe we can pick up the tradition next year.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
If mother in law is thrown out a bunch of
scenarios that require very little from new mom, then I
might say, okay, kid, is there no compromise here? You know?
If she's if she's saying I'll fly to you, I'll
stay in a hotel. I'll stay out of your way.
I just want to see my grandkids on Christmas or
near Christmas or whatever. And she's saying no, no, No.
The problem is, I think sometimes the personalities of these
(05:08):
very eager mom grandmothers can be off putting in itself.
You know, it can come off very aggressive when they
have the best in Like my mom, I love her
to death. She has the absolute best intention, but she pushes.
And you know, she and my sister are the same
woman in many ways. So it's like you're pushing you
and you wouldn't like to be you know what I mean.
(05:29):
So it's like you're getting a no to set boundaries.
But I know you and you see that as rejection,
but yet you have the best intention. You just want
to be a part of their lives. I get all
of that for me, though it's six weeks ago you
had a baby. No, they're not going to travel to you.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
No.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
No.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
I would love to hear from the thirteen because I
struggled with this being the only girl in my family.
I don't have kids. My brothers have the kids. But
I feel like you're so used to your family tradition,
like we always get together on this day, How dare
you have to go to your other in laws? You know, like,
I don't want to share you. I don't want to
share the family. So it's hard, but you have to
just be okay with it because people are allowed to
(06:07):
set boundaries.
Speaker 2 (06:08):
Yeah, well, and you know that there was if you've
been listening for a little while years ago, there was
a it was a rough transition in our house and
my sister said, we're not coming for Christmas anymore or
Thanksgiving because we want to have our own traditions in
our own home.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
And that was hard, and it wasn't because she was wrong.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
It was hard because our family is very close that
we're used to doing things a certain way for a
long time, and that included when we were young and
our grandparents and the whole thing. So we're breaking a
multi generational tradition of being together on Christmas and as
and people have said, why don't you go to Dallas?
I wouldn't say were invited, Like, honestly, I don't. I
don't think that's I don't think that's even an option
(06:47):
because I do that, and I don't think it's a
lack of light. I think she's drawing a firm boundary. Now,
is that a boundary that I would draw that firmly. No,
I would give a little more than my is because
she is getting a lot too, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
But like just get on a plane and go there
and stay in a hotel.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
It's like, I'm not entirely sure we were included. So
you know, I think I do think there's give and take.
I think I think sometimes, you know, the burden is
on the parents to provide opportunities for the grandparents, and
then the grandparents. I think sometimes I have to show
grace to the kids when you know, but I am
(07:28):
it's a very hard thing. Family can become very complicated,
even when there's a lot of love. Hey, Dominique, Hi, Hi,
so you have a new born. Congratulations by the way,
thank you. And so you hear this scenario where you've
got to and I wonder if the mother in law
because you hear mother in law and then you automatically
like feel this disconnect, right, but not necessarily that. But
(07:52):
here's this woman, she really wants everyone together on Christmas,
and her daughter in law who just had a baby
six weeks ago, saying, nah, we're not doing this, and
she has two other kids under five, Like, I can't
do it right now, and there's there's some tension there.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
What do you think?
Speaker 5 (08:06):
Yeah, I have a three month old, I have a
three year old. And if the first six months are
so hard, especially around like flu season, RSV season, and
the holiday season on top of that, the mom and
her family should be at home with her kids, her
young ones.
Speaker 6 (08:22):
This is like.
Speaker 5 (08:23):
Primetime Stanta time for them. They should be waking up
on Christmas morning in their home, in their pajamas, with
their family. Grandma is now in law or on the
mom's side, are now extended family. So it's about the
family that you made, not the family you came from.
Now they need to be prioritized. So Grandma needs to
go to them and at least like be the community
(08:45):
that she probably claims that she is because it takes
her lab take a tribe to raise kids, especially during
the flu and holiday season.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
Yeah, I agree with at minimum, at minimum, what she's
pitching should be things that are easy on them.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
And that's so real to say. When you say you
know you are the family, what did you say the
extended family?
Speaker 1 (09:06):
You're family?
Speaker 6 (09:07):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (09:08):
Hard, but it's true, true, and my parents too.
Speaker 5 (09:12):
My my family comes over to my house because it's
about the grandkids now, it's not about anybody else. Yeah,
even with Christmas and Santa and then a new baby,
come on, yeah, what about mom and baby in the family.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
Traditions need to change.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
I think the harder you push, the less likely you
are to be included in those traditions, and that can
be hard to Dominique. Thank you so much and congratulations again.
Have a good day.
Speaker 5 (09:34):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (09:35):
You guys too.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
Glad you called. Hey Kimmy, good morning. Do it next year.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
Kimmy, Hey, Kimmy, Kimmy, kim in the radio, Kimmy. I
just I just picked up the phone. I don't know
what you were saying. You gotta you gotta start over.
Speaker 6 (09:51):
Oh I'm sorry. Okay, Well, what I'm saying is that
this lady's in the right. I just opt out a kid.
I got two other toddlers. There ain't no way I
am going six hours with a newborn to Christmas. I
am gonna tell my mother in law. I'm sorry, but
(10:11):
we're doing this next year. You all go ahead, everybody else,
go ahead, do it. I'm not offended. Please, by all means,
go ahead. I'll wait till next year and I'll see
all next year.
Speaker 1 (10:22):
Let's face time.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Yeah, yes, Kimmy, thank you so much. I'm really glad
you called. No, that's what it is. It's again six
weeks ago.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
That's uh.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
So we have Kimmy now, we have Kim Hi, kim
How you doing? I'm well, how are you doing?
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Great? Kiki's court? What say you? I when I'm not
gonna lie.
Speaker 7 (10:41):
When I heard this, this immediately really frustrated me because
I have a not technically newborn vibe a micro creamy.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
He was born at twenty five weeks.
Speaker 7 (10:51):
He was born, you know, back in May, and even
though you know he's still he's like almost seven months,
like it's still newborn kind of this and any little
cold could send him.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
To the hospital.
Speaker 7 (11:04):
So the fact that there's this judgment for you know,
wanting to keep her, the mom safe, the.
Speaker 1 (11:10):
Baby safe, is just so frustrating. How's your son doing?
By the way, he's really good.
Speaker 7 (11:15):
He's done a little bit of oxygen, but you know,
he's doing really good. But we have to be so careful,
like you can't bring them around to anybody sick. So yeah,
I just I fight for the mom in this situation.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Yeah always yeah, well, Kim, thank you, have a good day,
good holiday as well, you too.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
Love you guys, I love you too, Thanks for listening.
Appreciate it. Jackie, Hello, Hi Jackie. Kiki's court. What's your take?
Speaker 8 (11:37):
You're the jury, So no, I don't think that she's
wrong at all. I had a similar situation. I had
my daughter's July second and then my system off wedding
was the fifteenth of July, and she wanted me to
go with my daughter, and I hope her no because
I just had her, you know, and same thing. You know,
(11:59):
I would being a dress, still wearing diaper, still healing,
and she was bad, and she thought that I was
using that as an excuse not to go through her wedding.
So I sided with the mom here. She's not wrong
at all whatsoever. Especially the nurse even told us, like
before we left the hospital, she's like, make sure that
(12:19):
the baby doesn't go out, because she she they see
it a lot of times where you know, parents want
to take the baby everywhere, ends up sick, that ends
up back in the hospital, and especially with ours b
being so like serious, you know, where babies do end
up on oxygen, you know, so that can pass away
from that. I agree with her one hundred percent, Like,
just take care of her, have herhal you know, because
(12:42):
that's very important as well as a mom to heal
and not you know, like start doing stuff too early
because then you know you're gonna have all these those
dress Sure.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
Yeah, thank you guys mom here. Yeah, you call that
a good day.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
This is a good point on the text, by the way,
And I was thinking about this the other day too.
I think we give too much weight to the actual
date of the holiday. Why does it have to be
twelve twenty five? Get together in January? The kids don't care.
My family celebrated Christmas as early as the first week
of December. If that's when extended family could get together,
I guess. I guess there's it's kind of a mental thing.
Everyone else is together on this day, doing this thing,
(13:21):
posting their pictures on instag right exactly so. But I mean,
you know, I'm like, yesterday I was at the airport.
I see the airline pilots get on this thing. I'm like,
you know a lot of these guys are going to
have to work on Christmas Christmas Eve. I'm sure that
they have kids, and it's like, well, we'll just do
it when I get back, or we'll do it the
day before, or for your friends right right, because you're
rist respond exactly, he's a hobby's a firefighter.
Speaker 4 (13:42):
I'm on the radio.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
You're my first.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
So clear, this isn't off on Christmas the Paulina.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
So you're the first person I call when I need something,
So you know, fire in the house, Paulina. You know
I'm choking on something. Paulina. Hey, Teresa, Hey, high to reasons.
So Kiki's Court. Basically, we have a situation where a
mother in law wants her daughter in law and her
grandkids at Christmas, but she just gave birth six weeks
ago and she's saying no, and she's getting guilted for that.
Speaker 5 (14:13):
I think she has ever right to say no. I
gave birth my daughter, who's going to be eighteen December
twenty first, had to get released from the hospital early
because both sides of my family still expected me to
host and I did.
Speaker 7 (14:27):
This.
Speaker 8 (14:27):
Mom should be empowered and stay home.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
Yeah wow, I think my mom would tell you the
same thing. She hosted Thanksgiving. I think she had me
the next day, but she didn't know I was. I
was early, but yeah, I think the expectation was or
maybe it was, maybe it wasn't. I don't remember one
of the case. Maybe people have expectations and oh wow crazy,
that is nuts. And now it's weird that you still
won't let them come eighteen years later. But that's a whole.
Speaker 1 (14:50):
Different thing.
Speaker 6 (14:52):
From that family.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
Well, you definitely won't let them come. So there it is.
Speaker 5 (14:57):
Whether my mother in love hosts now, she's amazing.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
There you go, Theresa, thank you, have a good day,
Mary Christmas. I don't think there's I'm looking at all
these texts. There's not one counter take here. There's not
one person going.
Speaker 3 (15:12):
Well, I was looking for a boomer that would like
stand on business.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
Yeah again, where's my mom? She's in a sleep Still.
Later she'll text him and she'll think it's me, but
it's to everybody.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
Yeah I did it, but maybe I'm a mat another
one on a NIP.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
I promise you whenever the moment this is heard in Arizona,
which is going to be somewhere three or four hours
from now, I'm going to get a call.
Speaker 1 (15:38):
But you know, I'm awesome.
Speaker 6 (15:40):
I'm gonna everybody your sister again.
Speaker 4 (15:46):
It comes Frost Mom.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
She mayn't even hurt in her sleep, so you gonna
wake up now
The Fred Show On Demand News
Show Links
Official WebsitePopular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!