The Boy Who Hasn't Lived

The Boy Who Hasn't Lived

A podcast about one friend forcing the other to read the entire Harry Potter book series for the first time.

Episodes

September 24, 2018 44 mins

In the 18th episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 18-20 of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. CJ comes up with a weird plan for dealing with werewolves, we both get grossed out by Peter Pettigrew, and we discuss some intriguing theories about who sent the patronus across the lake. Plus, CJ decides prongs was a narwhal.  

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In the 17th episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 15-17 of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. We have some deep chatz about masculinity, the Church and whether Harry should be allowed a Firebolt (spoiler alert, NO). CJ is still preoccupied by how Hermione is getting to all her classes. But the greatest mystery remains... when will Voldemort show up?

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In the 16th episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 12-14 of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. CJ's theories are on overdrive this month - they think Lupin might be Hermione and/or Sirius Black; and they're still very suspicious about Crookshanks the cat... who also might be Sirius Black? Other than that, it's mostly just us being annoyed with Harry's recklessness. 

If you l...

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In the 15th episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 9-11 of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. We start with a recap for newcomers about why CJ never read the books before, and get an update on how CJ is feeling about witchcraft and the Church. CJ has a new theory about how Sirius Black is getting into the castle, and still can't work out whether Lupin is a good guy or bad guy. Arlie man...

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In the 14th episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 6-8 of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. CJ has noticed Hermione has too many classes in her timetable, and the working theory is... three Hermiones? Other mysteries include how Sirius Black got into the castle, and what a boggart would turn into if either of us found one in our house. Also, a tangent on knee caps. 

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In the 13th episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 1-5 of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. CJ is looking for Voldemort around every corner. Even really unlikely corners. Even corners that aren't really corners. JK very successfully throws us off the Sirius Black scent, and we have to announce a Major Incident. 

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In the 12th episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie watch the second Harry Potter movie in the company of special guest Charles Adrian Gillott. The consensus is that this film makes no sense, but it was definitely funny to behold. We tackle tough questions like what is going on? Why is any of this happening? And oh my god why are there so many spiders at Hogwarts?

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September 25, 2017 24 mins

In the 11th episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie are guests on Dave Pickering's podcast, Getting Better Acquainted. In this mini episode, we play just a little bit of the conversation we had with Dave. If you'd like to hear the rest of it, you can find the full episode by searching for Getting Better Acquainted in your podcast app, or you can go here to listen on SoundCloud. 

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In the 10th episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 14-18 of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. This month Percy is acting weird and we’re very suspicious – could he be colluding with the Heir of Slytherin? Or is it something more… innocent? CJ's theories are getting wilder and in some cases more accurate. But we won't tell them which ones are which. Plus, CJ is creeped out by the gia...

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In the 9th episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 10-13 of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. CJ is overwhelmed by theories about who might be the heir of Slytherin, but there's one thing they know for sure - Hagrid is innocent. We also tackle the important questions of the day, like where is Voldemort's body? Is it in storage? Why is Lucius Malfoy such a loser? And could we use poly...

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In the eighth episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 5-9 of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. This month CJ blesses us with a number of theories that range from incredible (re: Mrs Norris) and slightly disturbing (re: possible hiding places for Lord Voldemort), to just very confused (re: candidates for heir of Slytherin). We also discuss public toilet anxieties for arguably a bit too long.

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In the seventh episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 1-4 of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. We're also joined by our friend Freddy McConnell, who owns a first edition copy of the Philosopher's Stone (sadly rendered worthless in a terrible accident involving his dad heavily underestimating the potential of this book series). This month we ponder where wizards get off thinking tele...

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In this mini update from The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie have news on the topics of scheduling (ooh, scheduling!) and the lemming community of CJ's flat. There is also some musical fun at the end. New episode coming soon! 

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The Boy Who Hasn't Lived is a podcast about one friend forcing the other to read the entire Harry Potter book series for the first time. 

Join your hosts CJ and Arlie, as CJ finally r...

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February 20, 2017 34 mins

In the sixth episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about the first Harry Potter movie. Join us for a discussion centred mostly around the world class child acting delivered by our main protagonists. We also talk about animatronic Robbie Coltrane, our favourite bits of magical world building, and Jesus tries to stop us from watching the film. Again. Plus, where the heck was Peeves?

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In this bonus episode, CJ and Arlie are joined by Jess Pumphrey to talk about some fun facts sent in by listeners during our Philosopher's Stone episodes. Find out what a Supreme Mugwump is, learn about the impressive athleticism of muggle quidditch, and get the gossip on Nicholas Flamel. Plus, we we discuss the pros and cons of burial vs. cremation. Because this podcast is fun! 

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In the fourth episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 13-17 of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. CJ has now read an entire Harry Potter book! CJ is now normal. This week we talk about our favourite characters from the first book, whether the Forbidden Forest is an appropriate location for a detention, and whether or not Snape is evil. (He is. He isn't. He is. He... isn't? He is....

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November 28, 2016 61 mins

In the third episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about chapters 6-12 of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. This week we meet Hermione, Ron, Neville, Malfoy and Snape - to name but a few. We learn how to play quidditch, Arlie does a rap (um, sort of) and CJ has a crush on a teacher - oh my! Plus, Peeves pays CJ a visit on the London Underground.

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November 14, 2016 32 mins

In the second episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about the first five chapters of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. The good news is... CJ likes it! So we can keep making this podcast. We also establish that Harry has a spark, Dudley needs discipline and Dumbledore's high heeled boots are FAB-U-LOUS. Plus, CJ sees their first Harry Potter meme that they understand, and we discuss the importan...

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October 31, 2016 24 mins

It's 2016 - nineteen years after Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone originally came out - and CJ is finally about to read it. 

In the first episode of The Boy Who Hasn't Lived, CJ and Arlie talk about how Harry Potter impacted them differently growing up, the devil and TV evangelists, whether the spirit of Harry Potter killed CJ’s parakeet, whether Arlie is a wizard, and CJ describes what they think is going to ha...

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October 12, 2016 5 mins

The Boy Who Hasn't Lived is a podcast about one friend forcing the other to read the entire Harry Potter book series for the first time.

In the trailer you get to meet your hosts, CJ and Arlie; find out why the heck CJ never read Harry Potter before; and listen to some Harry Potter fans react to CJ's attempt to explain what happens in Harry Potter. Spoiler alert - it's wildly inaccurate. 

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