November 13, 2024 • 10 mins
This week, Patricia checks in about initial feelings after the election and offers a few bits of advice on where to focus your energy first.
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Sound editing by Jen Zink
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Music (00:00):
[Intro Music]
Patricia (00:15):
Hi friends, welcome to Enthusiastic Encouragement and
Dubious Advice, the podcast forfolks who would rather curl into
the fetal position than lean in.
I'm your host, Patricia, and I'mrecording this show on November 7th, 2024.
Hi everyone, just me today, Nicoleis running around the house.
We are getting ready to go on a littletrip and we'll, we'll be back by the time
(00:41):
you hear this show, but I still wantedto get on here and record something.
You know, the past few days have been alot and I wanted to check in and I still
wanted to be able to give you something.
So, right now, as I am recording,it is two days after the election.
(01:01):
Everyone is pretty raw.
We actually, on election night, got aninvite to hang out with some friends, and
so, it was actually good for us to do thatinstead of isolating as we tend to do.
Everyone has a lot of feelings right now.
You may be going through thefive to seven stages of grief,
depending on, on who you ask.
(01:23):
Could be sadness, anger,shock, rage, despair, fear.
All of these feelings are legit.
They're all valid.
If you can cry, please consider crying.
Crying is release.
It's going to trigger thatparasympathetic nervous system.
(01:44):
It's going to hopefully helpyou lower your heart rate.
I know crying kind of helps me releaseand then I'm able to focus afterward
instead of focusing so much onavoiding crying or avoiding feelings.
It's really important for you tofeel these feelings right now.
(02:04):
And you're going to continueto feel these feelings.
It's not like, okay, I'm done with grief.
And now I could do something.
Like we are going to be doing thingswhile we also feel like garbage.
I want to shout out other Blackwomen and femmes out there.
We tried.
Please get some rest.
I hope we can all get somerest and get some peace.
(02:27):
We tried to save this country thathates us, probably doesn't deserve it.
You know, we talked aboutshould Black women save the U.S.
in a previous episode thatI'll link in the show notes.
But, I hope, I hope wecan all get some rest.
I want to put it out there thatif you were hopeful, you were not
foolish or sorry for the use ofthis word, you are not stupid.
(02:49):
Hope is very hard.
It takes strength to hope.
Hope is necessary.
I would not be here if myancestors did not hope.
We would not be here if ourqueer elders did not hope.
Hope is very importantto carry forward with us.
Personally, I think cynicism is lazy.
(03:09):
I think it's easy.
Cynicism is not creative.
Hope is difficult.
Hope takes creativity andcuriosity and imagination.
And, yeah, this country isbuilt on genocide and slavery.
Many of us kind of looked at that andwe are not surprised at the outcome.
(03:30):
And maybe the country in its currentiteration doesn't deserve to be saved.
But us, each other, like you herelistening and your loved ones,
and me and Nicole and our lovedones, and everyone who is hopeful.
We all deserve joy and careand basic human rights.
It is real easy to spiral right now.
(03:52):
I know we're publishing this, youknow, a week after the results.
Some folks may still be spiraling.
We are all panic, nodisco and in this moment.
It is not a good time to be making bigdecisions, and eventually by the time
this episode airs, we'll be focusingon what is next in our own lives.
(04:16):
I'm not going to cover a lot of thebig possible actions right now, uh,
there's a lot of people covering that.
I think we need to firsttalk about some basics.
Are you eating regularly?
Are you hydrating?
Are you taking your meds?
Are you bathing?
Are you getting out of bed andcontinuing to go to work or school?
(04:40):
I think especially work,although it seems ridiculous to
be working at a time like this.
Rent still needs to get paid.
We still need to hold on toour health care if we have it.
For now.
And also, are you isolating or areyou connecting with other people?
That could be in person, that couldbe via DMs, via text, it all counts.
(05:02):
We still need to care forourselves during this time.
This is your first action.
Stay alive.
If you got to do it out of spite,then persevere out of spite.
It's kept me going this long.
Do not hand your power over.
Do not hand your joy over.
(05:22):
Rebecca Solnit recently said, thefact that we cannot save everything
does not mean we cannot save anything.
And everything we cansave is worth saving.
A couple of initial actions, like wesaid, it's incredibly easy to spiral.
Here are, hopefully, some easy lifts.
If you have the privilege to have apassport and the ability to travel, get
(05:47):
your passport renewed, even if it doesn'texpire for two more years or something.
Get it renewed.
Some folks, if your passport is within acertain window, you can renew it online.
Other folks are gonna have to mail it in.
Related, have copies of all your documentsin one place where you know where they
are and where they are accessible.
If this is something you've been planningon doing, now is the time to do it.
(06:09):
I also need us all to reallythink about our online presence.
Especially if you fallunder the queer umbrella.
If you need to do a bunch of blocking, youneed to make certain accounts private or
scrape them all together, then do that.
Let's turn off the microphonesfor your robot assistant devices.
Your Google Home, yourAlexa, whatever you got.
(06:31):
Let's turn off the microphones.
And finally, let's takesome stock of our resources.
What, obviously, monetary would you have?
Medication, how much do you have?
Do you need to refill that?
What are the skills you have?
What are the knowledge you have?
The abilities you have?
Who are the people you knowwho's already in your community?
(06:52):
What are the privileges that you do have?
It can help to know what you have, thatyou can lean on, as well as what you
can offer to others in your community.
Finally, I know this has been a shortone, but Nicole and I are really
going to have to think about whatfuture iterations of this podcast are.
Recognizing there may be some thingsthat we cannot talk about anymore.
(07:16):
You know, we had a bunch of end ofyear plans about like, here are the
best books we read this year, andhere's what we learned this year.
And maybe here are ourgoals for next year.
And, you know, we're really gonna have tothink about what, what that looks like.
And what is self help during these times?
(07:37):
What does that look like right now?
We don't want to be ignorantof what is going on.
We want to be able to read the room andnot just keep on keeping on, you know,
anyone talking about manifesting right nowis getting a real big side eye from me.
So, let us know what you want or need.
Give us a rating to letus know what you enjoy.
(08:00):
Write it down, give us a five star rating.
It really helps people find us andhopefully we'll be able to offer
things that people find helpful.
Finally, I think it's reallyimportant to recognize that good
things exist alongside bad things.
(08:20):
Right?
You could still celebrate a birthday.
You could still delight in kittens.
You could still read a great book.
And it's really important to holdtight to those things and let yourself
experience joy at every opportunity.
Recently, the thing that's fillingmy cup is a writer whose work I
love, and admired, and admire,introduced me to her friends the
(08:44):
other night as a brilliant writer.
And as the saying goes, like, nobodycan't tell me nothing now after that.
So that is our show for today.
We'd like to thank our awesomeaudio editor, Jen Zink.
You can find her at loopdilou.comand we will leave a link
to that in our show notes.
You can find the full show notesand transcript at eedapod.com.
(09:06):
That's E E D A P O D dot com.
There you can also find a link to ourPatreon, our bookshop link, and the link
to the ongoing, Enthusiastic Encouragementand Dubious Advice newsletter.
You can currently find us onInstagram and Bluesky at eedapod
and email us at eedapod@gmail.com.
That's where you're going tolet us know what you want.
(09:27):
What you need moving forward.
We are nothing if not consistent.
We are eedapod everywhere.
We would appreciate so muchif you subscribe, rate us,
share this podcast, please.
That is the holiday gift we want.
Please share this podcast with someoneyou think who will listen to it.
(09:48):
We would also appreciate anyonewho can subscribe to us on Patreon.
We can post things that arenot for the public on there.
Really suggest that you do that.
It is going to be one ofour more private places.
As it is, it's still on the internet.
So, you know, what is privacy?
Support there is going toreally, really help us.
(10:09):
In the meantime, we hope you findways to be kind to yourself, drink
some water, read something lovely,and we'll be talking to you soon.
[Intro Music]
Patricia (00:15):
Hi friends, welcome to Enthusiastic Encouragement and
Dubious Advice, the podcast forfolks who would rather curl into
the fetal position than lean in.
I'm your host, Patricia, and I'mrecording this show on November 7th, 2024.
Hi everyone, just me today, Nicoleis running around the house.
We are getting ready to go on a littletrip and we'll, we'll be back by the time
(00:41):
you hear this show, but I still wantedto get on here and record something.
You know, the past few days have been alot and I wanted to check in and I still
wanted to be able to give you something.
So, right now, as I am recording,it is two days after the election.
(01:01):
Everyone is pretty raw.
We actually, on election night, got aninvite to hang out with some friends, and
so, it was actually good for us to do thatinstead of isolating as we tend to do.
Everyone has a lot of feelings right now.
You may be going through thefive to seven stages of grief,
depending on, on who you ask.
(01:23):
Could be sadness, anger,shock, rage, despair, fear.
All of these feelings are legit.
They're all valid.
If you can cry, please consider crying.
Crying is release.
It's going to trigger thatparasympathetic nervous system.
(01:44):
It's going to hopefully helpyou lower your heart rate.
I know crying kind of helps me releaseand then I'm able to focus afterward
instead of focusing so much onavoiding crying or avoiding feelings.
It's really important for you tofeel these feelings right now.
(02:04):
And you're going to continueto feel these feelings.
It's not like, okay, I'm done with grief.
And now I could do something.
Like we are going to be doing thingswhile we also feel like garbage.
I want to shout out other Blackwomen and femmes out there.
We tried.
Please get some rest.
I hope we can all get somerest and get some peace.
(02:27):
We tried to save this country thathates us, probably doesn't deserve it.
You know, we talked aboutshould Black women save the U.S.
in a previous episode thatI'll link in the show notes.
But, I hope, I hope wecan all get some rest.
I want to put it out there thatif you were hopeful, you were not
foolish or sorry for the use ofthis word, you are not stupid.
(02:49):
Hope is very hard.
It takes strength to hope.
Hope is necessary.
I would not be here if myancestors did not hope.
We would not be here if ourqueer elders did not hope.
Hope is very importantto carry forward with us.
Personally, I think cynicism is lazy.
(03:09):
I think it's easy.
Cynicism is not creative.
Hope is difficult.
Hope takes creativity andcuriosity and imagination.
And, yeah, this country isbuilt on genocide and slavery.
Many of us kind of looked at that andwe are not surprised at the outcome.
(03:30):
And maybe the country in its currentiteration doesn't deserve to be saved.
But us, each other, like you herelistening and your loved ones,
and me and Nicole and our lovedones, and everyone who is hopeful.
We all deserve joy and careand basic human rights.
It is real easy to spiral right now.
(03:52):
I know we're publishing this, youknow, a week after the results.
Some folks may still be spiraling.
We are all panic, nodisco and in this moment.
It is not a good time to be making bigdecisions, and eventually by the time
this episode airs, we'll be focusingon what is next in our own lives.
(04:16):
I'm not going to cover a lot of thebig possible actions right now, uh,
there's a lot of people covering that.
I think we need to firsttalk about some basics.
Are you eating regularly?
Are you hydrating?
Are you taking your meds?
Are you bathing?
Are you getting out of bed andcontinuing to go to work or school?
(04:40):
I think especially work,although it seems ridiculous to
be working at a time like this.
Rent still needs to get paid.
We still need to hold on toour health care if we have it.
For now.
And also, are you isolating or areyou connecting with other people?
That could be in person, that couldbe via DMs, via text, it all counts.
(05:02):
We still need to care forourselves during this time.
This is your first action.
Stay alive.
If you got to do it out of spite,then persevere out of spite.
It's kept me going this long.
Do not hand your power over.
Do not hand your joy over.
(05:22):
Rebecca Solnit recently said, thefact that we cannot save everything
does not mean we cannot save anything.
And everything we cansave is worth saving.
A couple of initial actions, like wesaid, it's incredibly easy to spiral.
Here are, hopefully, some easy lifts.
If you have the privilege to have apassport and the ability to travel, get
(05:47):
your passport renewed, even if it doesn'texpire for two more years or something.
Get it renewed.
Some folks, if your passport is within acertain window, you can renew it online.
Other folks are gonna have to mail it in.
Related, have copies of all your documentsin one place where you know where they
are and where they are accessible.
If this is something you've been planningon doing, now is the time to do it.
(06:09):
I also need us all to reallythink about our online presence.
Especially if you fallunder the queer umbrella.
If you need to do a bunch of blocking, youneed to make certain accounts private or
scrape them all together, then do that.
Let's turn off the microphonesfor your robot assistant devices.
Your Google Home, yourAlexa, whatever you got.
(06:31):
Let's turn off the microphones.
And finally, let's takesome stock of our resources.
What, obviously, monetary would you have?
Medication, how much do you have?
Do you need to refill that?
What are the skills you have?
What are the knowledge you have?
The abilities you have?
Who are the people you knowwho's already in your community?
(06:52):
What are the privileges that you do have?
It can help to know what you have, thatyou can lean on, as well as what you
can offer to others in your community.
Finally, I know this has been a shortone, but Nicole and I are really
going to have to think about whatfuture iterations of this podcast are.
Recognizing there may be some thingsthat we cannot talk about anymore.
(07:16):
You know, we had a bunch of end ofyear plans about like, here are the
best books we read this year, andhere's what we learned this year.
And maybe here are ourgoals for next year.
And, you know, we're really gonna have tothink about what, what that looks like.
And what is self help during these times?
(07:37):
What does that look like right now?
We don't want to be ignorantof what is going on.
We want to be able to read the room andnot just keep on keeping on, you know,
anyone talking about manifesting right nowis getting a real big side eye from me.
So, let us know what you want or need.
Give us a rating to letus know what you enjoy.
(08:00):
Write it down, give us a five star rating.
It really helps people find us andhopefully we'll be able to offer
things that people find helpful.
Finally, I think it's reallyimportant to recognize that good
things exist alongside bad things.
(08:20):
Right?
You could still celebrate a birthday.
You could still delight in kittens.
You could still read a great book.
And it's really important to holdtight to those things and let yourself
experience joy at every opportunity.
Recently, the thing that's fillingmy cup is a writer whose work I
love, and admired, and admire,introduced me to her friends the
(08:44):
other night as a brilliant writer.
And as the saying goes, like, nobodycan't tell me nothing now after that.
So that is our show for today.
We'd like to thank our awesomeaudio editor, Jen Zink.
You can find her at loopdilou.comand we will leave a link
to that in our show notes.
You can find the full show notesand transcript at eedapod.com.
(09:06):
That's E E D A P O D dot com.
There you can also find a link to ourPatreon, our bookshop link, and the link
to the ongoing, Enthusiastic Encouragementand Dubious Advice newsletter.
You can currently find us onInstagram and Bluesky at eedapod
and email us at eedapod@gmail.com.
That's where you're going tolet us know what you want.
(09:27):
What you need moving forward.
We are nothing if not consistent.
We are eedapod everywhere.
We would appreciate so muchif you subscribe, rate us,
share this podcast, please.
That is the holiday gift we want.
Please share this podcast with someoneyou think who will listen to it.
(09:48):
We would also appreciate anyonewho can subscribe to us on Patreon.
We can post things that arenot for the public on there.
Really suggest that you do that.
It is going to be one ofour more private places.
As it is, it's still on the internet.
So, you know, what is privacy?
Support there is going toreally, really help us.
(10:09):
In the meantime, we hope you findways to be kind to yourself, drink
some water, read something lovely,and we'll be talking to you soon.
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