S7, E7: What is a True Human?

In this episode of the Spirit + Soul podcast, Tiffany shares insights inspired by a conversation she came across on Instagram about grief and trauma. She encourages listeners to become more aware of their full range of emotions, including feeling lost or overwhelmed by sadness. Tiffany reminds us that it's okay to feel these emotions deeply, and to let go of them with grace, allowing us to live in the present moment without letting the past control us.

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Episode Transcript

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Tiffany Cohen (00:04)

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Welcome to the Spirit and Soul podcast. Your life is about to get a soul-based makeover. Discover what it is to live intentionally, manifest your best life, and release what holds you back with your host, Tiffany Cohen, from Spirit and Soul Studio. In this podcast, we're talking all about manifesting magic, crystals, and more. You'll get to hear conversations with some of the most magical people in the world and begin to live your life from your spirit and soul.
Let's get started. Wow, this episode comes really from a place of like deep thought of something that I just saw on Instagram. I never saw this before. And I don't know the full backstory or anything like that, but I just saw a, an interview with Anderson Cooper.
leading it with Stephen Colbert. And he talks about, like, basically, it's like about grief and about this duality and what it is to be a full human. And there's just sometimes things, and I know that you, I'm sure, have experienced something where
It just stops you dead in your tracks. And I actually had to listen to it two or three times because it was really thought provoking for me. And I wanted to jump on immediately and create a podcast episode that maybe leaves you with some thoughts. And these are just the thoughts that are.
are coming up to me right now and maybe things that I've been like looking at in my own life and experiencing and walking through and talking through with my own children and my own family. But I really found it to be incredibly beautiful. I'm going to try to link to it. I think I'm going even try to like put it in my story so you know what I'm talking about. I'll like share it for a few days. But basically what
the whole gist of the interview came down to, again, was only like, what I saw was maybe a minute. And it was so profound. And what Stephen Colbert was talking about was that, I guess he had experienced a loss. And again, I don't know the backstory. And that while he wishes that the loss did not happen, that there was
there is beauty that did come from it and that this experience has made him more of a full human. And then he does, you know, kind of dissociate from it and like push it out and say, when we experience things, right? So there is a little bit of a dissociation there, which does show me that he's still walking through it, right? Not fully out, but just the awareness of the emotions is what really
peaked my interest and really had me thinking in a lot of, about a lot of different things. So let's kind of start taking this apart a little bit. When it comes to the things that we walk through, and it doesn't have to be grief, but when it comes to the things that we walk through in life, I'm sure that every single one of us has experienced
some kind of big T, small T, trauma, a loss, even if the grief is over a former version of yourself or things changed and life changed suddenly. And now it's almost like you're grieving a past version of you or a past lifetime. And I wanna sit in that for a moment.
because we all have these experiences and I am quite sure that we all look back on parts of our lives and wish for something or wish that something was done differently or was different. And we can't make it different, right? Like there's no, there's no going back. There's no going back in time. There's no going back and hitting the rewind button as much as you may want to and we may want to.
But if we can consistently just sit in that grief or that what if, or I wish it was this way, then what happens is we're actually not allowing ourselves to be present or look to a bright future, look to the future that we want to have for ourselves. And maybe you can't even think about the future because you're so caught in the past. Like there's a piece of you.
that is stuck and this is how like I envision it or how I feel it the most is that when we have these moments that maybe rip a piece of our heart out or maybe it feels like the whole thing, we leave a piece of ourselves in that moment and maybe even in the grief afterwards. But I feel like it does get kind of caught in that.
Timeline and in that moment and it's almost like a Piece of your soul is stuck there because the heart is a piece is the seed of the soul And when this happens This is when we often get stuck in the past we get stuck in the grief We get stuck in the loss We get stuck stuck in the what-ifs Or if only this happened or didn't happen
then things would be different. If I did this, then life would be different, right? Now we're so caught in this past that the present moment is not the present moment and the future cannot even be seen. And then life is just being lived barely on autopilot or we think we're living life, but we're so, we're thinking about those moments every single day. And
What I want to say and speak to is this and what Stephen Colbert kind of was saying was that he believes in this idea of the full human. Doesn't mean that the full human is a good human, he says, because there can be a full human that doesn't do good things, but that the idea of the full human and the full human is a person that experiences it all.
allows it all in, allows in all of those low vibration emotions, the ones that really are painful and hurt, and also allows themselves to experience the highest end of the most beautiful emotions, the biggest of love and the biggest of joys. And what I see quite often is everybody has a range of comfortability.
Everyone has a range of what they are willing to feel in their lives. You know, how much pain am I willing to feel? How much love am I willing to feel? And until it gets to a point where those things feel overwhelming and what then can often happen is that the emotions just get shut off completely.
I watched during one of my trainings because I'm training as a rapid transformational therapist. And in one of my trainings, I remember this woman saying that she had experienced so much loss. It was like a back to back to back loss in such a short amount of time that she just shut off every emotion. She didn't feel the pain.
And as she experienced like another loss, she didn't feel it. So there was a protection aspect there. But also what she was saying was that what the result was, was that her kids would say, I love you to her. And she would say, I love you, but couldn't feel it. And man, like that hit me. imagine knowing in your mind.
that you have felt deep love for family members, for your own children, and not being able to access it because you've actually fully turned it off. It's like if you're a Vampire Diaries fan, it's like turning off your humanity, you know, and just like, you know, sitting, just being, and not even like, like just being and like not experiencing anything that you're feeling.
I cannot imagine what that's like. you know, I hope I never get to a point where that's even an option for myself.

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I've been in a lot of pain before, physical pain and also emotional pain. I've felt very, very deeply like, you know, sadness. And also I have also experienced the biggest of joys. And I know that at some point along the way I do tap.
you know, this is like a personal thing. And I think that we all do it in some way is that we cap out our highest emotions. We cap out, you know, joy or excitement because, you know, it's almost like overwhelming to feel it. And that's something that I work on quite frequently to feel the most that I could feel. But sometimes like, if you really like, want you to tune in for a moment and really like,
feel into the depth of your emotions and what you allow yourself to feel. Like, do you allow yourself to feel a full range of happiness? Do you allow yourself to feel a full range of love and joy? And also, do you allow yourself to feel your full range of anger, of sadness? And I think anger especially, like,
Anger can feel scary for like when you really deeply like let yourself go there. Like I know that a lot of times if I feel anger, I will immediately just say like, well, I just, I don't care. And that's kind of shutting it down if you really think about it. And I kind of have to sit with like, am I angry or like, do I actually not care or am I so angry that I'm shutting it down?
And that right there is the awareness of your emotions. And I truly believe that the best thing that you can do for yourself is to allow yourself to feel those emotions and feel them deeply. Like to understand your emotions. Understanding them is the key. It's asking yourself the questions. It's stopping.
in the moment and saying, wait, am I capping this emotion or am I just done feeling it? Am I, is this my initial reaction to feel this way or did I cut it off before it gets started? Right? And like, these are personal questions that in a moment you can ask yourself, but if we're not
feeling our full range of emotions, we cannot be a true human like Stephen Colbert mentioned. We can't be that true human because to be human is to feel. To be human is to feel. And if you are not feeling like that woman in the Rapper Transformational Therapy session, if you're not allowing yourself to feel,
then you're not allowing yourself to live. You're not allowing yourself to be. And that means that you're gonna get hurt. And that means that you're going to feel uncomfortable emotions and what you do with them and the stories that you assign to them are gonna make all the difference because you can feel sadness and you can feel grief.
and you can feel loss. You can feel all of those things and then get stuck and allow yourself to just get stuck in that moment in time. Or you can feel them all, feel them fully and all the way through and then let go. Let go of them for now. It doesn't mean they won't come back.
But what it does mean is that you're not allowing the emotions to control you. And I think that at the end of the day, being a true human would mean that we can feel that full range of emotions and not assign meanings or stories to where they came from and just walk through and have an acceptance for.
situations in your life. And I say that with love and I say that with grace because there are unimaginable things that happen to people and there are horrors and there are really, really painful things that we can walk through.
And I understand that and it doesn't take away from that. But what I'm saying is that we are meant no matter what it is, no matter what you walk through, that you are meant to move forward from it. You're meant to move forward from it. So if you're meant to move forward, then you can't have a piece of you.
so stuck in the past that that's where you're living from.
And I think that's what makes all the difference. I truly think that that is what makes the difference in your life of being that true human. It's that you are feeling it and then moving forward. And this is where I see so many of my clients, so many of my clients, they're so stuck in situations from the past and I get stuck there too.
Right, like I have situations from the past that I am still thinking about that every so often it pops up and it does still have that electric charge. It will stop me in my tracks.
And when it happens though, I am so aware of it. And I know that there's something caught there. There's something still stuck there that isn't resolved for me. And maybe it's within my own healing. Maybe it's within that other person that's like tugging on the cord and still staying stuck to it, right? Or maybe I am the one that's still staying stuck to it. But I have the awareness of it, right? Like I get it.
It's when you don't have the awareness that will keep you in that place forever. Forever.
And I don't think you actually want that. I know that it might feel great to like go back in time, but then you're missing out on life. You're missing out on the life that you're meant to live and the things that you're meant to fulfill in this lifetime. I look at life as a mission and I have missions and I believe that we all have sole missions.
call it soul purpose, but I like to look at them as missions. And that we have multiples of them. And maybe like for me, it's like be an amazing mother and wife. Like that for me was a mission for me, you know, to be a mother and also to fall madly in love with my husband and to experience that true love.
and all the things that come with it, right? Like all the things, just because it's true love doesn't mean that we don't have ups and downs. It doesn't mean that we don't challenge each other. And I think that those challenges are what makes you grow, right? But at the end of the day, it's still my sole mission to be the best partner.
And also I have a soul mission of spirit and soul and what I'm meant to do through spirit and soul, what I'm meant to do in my life and help other people turn their lights on. And knowing that something is mission for me makes me go full force with it rather than just going through life without, with my eyes closed. And I did that for too long. Like I went through life with my eyes closed. Doesn't mean I didn't experience things and

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love things and appreciate things in my life. But I was go, I was, I had my eyes closed to what I was meant to be doing. I had my eyes closed to my soul. And now I know better. And now I know more about the healing journey and the feelings and the emotions and really feeling into these things and going through them so that I can be the truest human.
possible that I can say when I leave this earth that I lived that I experienced what I came here to experience and Also that I got my shit done That I got my missions that I came to earth to complete I got them done and like it's almost like I'm going through life right now with such an awareness that I When that day does come
that I'm gonna get there and like, no, I completed my missions. Like, did you see that?
And I will know at the end of my life that I lived it to the fullest, that I didn't, know, once I was awakened to everything around me, that I did everything to make life and live life at the biggest version of it possible. And the biggest version means understanding and feeling into the ups and the celebrations and the amazing things.
and also the lows because we all have them. And what did I do in those moments? Did I let those moments define me or did I let them be the experience, experience the emotions, experience the pain, the loss, et cetera? And did I keep moving forward?
So, you know, this episode is a little, think, you know, maybe emotionally charged. And I hope that you're feeling it on your end. Like, I hope that this episode makes you think about life. And I hope that it makes you think about how you're living it and how you're stuck. And are you living?
from 10 years ago when something happened? Or are you living for right now? Or are you living for a really bright future that you can see unfolding before you and you're working towards that mission while also being present to this one? Or do you let yourself continuously have these anchors that keep you stuck in the past? And the more that we can undo those anchors and give
love to that former version of you, giving love to as much love as you can to the situation.
Like that is, I believe, how we let go of those anchors with grace and with love.
So I hope that this episode resonates with you. I hope that this episode really does give you that fuel to start to maybe look at life differently. And also where are you turning off those emotions? Where are you not allowing yourself to feel into them at the biggest and highest level? And wherever you are doing that, I want you to stop and I want you to let yourself feel it.
exactly as it's meant to be felt. Feel it fully, feel it through, I promise you, I promise you. On the other side of it is relief, is you will feel light, because light is on the other side of every shadow, and that's what these are.
So let's learn to bring light to these shadows in the best way possible and to learn and take steps forward every single day, every single day to have the courage to be a true human. And I do think it takes courage to do that, but it also takes vulnerability just as Brene Brown says, Courage and vulnerability go hand in hand. So let yourself be vulnerable enough.
and also courageous enough to go forward being that true human. And if you need help with anything at all, as you're walking through these shadows, you know that we are here for you at Spirit and Soul Studio. We would love to work with you, love to support you in any way possible. So you can reach out to us on Instagram at Spirit and Soul Studio.
and will see you on the next episode of the Spirit and Soul Podcast.