279. Can Goodness and Wealth Go Hand-In-Hand? with Myra Salzer

When someone inherits money, you have to mourn the loss of your life as you have known it up until that time before you can move on. Most people don't think about that. They think, “Oh, $18 million, woohoo!” But it's a big change.

If the idea of making a lot of money scares you, because you think it will make you a jerk, today’s episode will give you insight into the mindset of heirs to incredible wealth. We are leaving so much about our relationship with wealth and money unexamined.

Let’s blow the relationship with wealth wide open: People with and without money are almost identical – not in their day-to-day, but how they view themselves. Our guest, Myra Salzer is an advocate for people who have received a significant inheritance.

 

Since she founded The Wealth Conservancy, she has worked with inheritors who have collectively inherited billions. The firm's services combine life and wealth coaching and financial planning.

If you are thinking this doesn't apply to you, it does, especially if you are trying to grow your business and earn more money.

Myra says it’s important to recognize the people she works with don’t have an advocate, and they’ve been born into a situation they have no control over.

“There's no manual on how to manage $50 million … and yet they're expected to be happy,” says Myra.

Business owners, too, can get insecure about money. There’s this idea that if you have money, you must somehow be bad. Myra says she sees this with her clients as well. Their net worth and self-worth are misaligned, and they are afraid of judgments. This might mean hiding their wealth, because they want to fit in

This is true on the other side of the financial spectrum as well. Whether you’re born into wealth or poverty, there’s a pattern of thought that says you’re just supposed to know what to do with money, and we’re not supposed to talk about it.

Myra notes that being an heir isn’t like winning the lottery. Usually, it’s a gradual event. Myra recalls one of her first clients as a financial planner: A young couple booked an appointment – he came in downcast that he didn’t have any income; she was playing with a large engagement ring.

Myra learned he’d lived off trust income for his whole life, but it terminated when he hit 35. He didn’t know what to do with the $18 million in the bank. Her ring was $60,000, and she was wearing it with the stone towards her palm – embarrassed at the thought of showing her father who couldn’t make a mortgage payment.

This appointment laid the foundation for Myra’s specialty.

“The amount of money doesn't matter. It's the impact it has on your life,” says Myra. “So it could be $100 to a homeless person. Or $1,000 to a recent high school graduate. If it impacts their standard of living, it's a lot.”

Myra breaks down the five stages of inheritance progression as: innocent stage, denial, ignorant acceptance, learning, growing and integrated authority.

Ignorant acceptance is where Myra steps in to help. People have accepted their financial circumstances, but they have no training.

.css-j9qmi7{display:-webkit-box;display:-webkit-flex;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-webkit-flex-direction:row;-ms-flex-direction:row;flex-direction:row;font-weight:700;margin-bottom:1rem;margin-top:2.8rem;width:100%;-webkit-box-pack:start;-ms-flex-pack:start;-webkit-justify-content:start;justify-content:start;padding-left:5rem;}@media only screen and (max-width: 599px){.css-j9qmi7{padding-left:0;-webkit-box-pack:center;-ms-flex-pack:center;-webkit-justify-content:center;justify-content:center;}}.css-j9qmi7 svg{fill:#27292D;}.css-j9qmi7 .eagfbvw0{-webkit-align-items:center;-webkit-box-align:center;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;color:#27292D;}