December 24, 2024 • 69 mins
In this Christmas Eve episode, Frank and Carlo dive into a festive feast of topics, from holiday traditions to the joys and challenges of fatherhood. Join them as they discuss the Feast of the Seven Fishes, reminisce about Christmas memories, and share their favorite holiday traditions.
Frank also provides an update on his wife's pregnancy and introduces a new segment called "The Dadabase," featuring a conversation with a friend and colleague about the unique perspective of being a single dad.
Tune in for a heartwarming episode filled with laughter, reflection, and the spirit of the season!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:12):
This is the gray hair and daycare podcast with a combined age of 111 years and a combined IQ right in that same range.
Your hosts, Frank Cereo and Karlo Russo.
Welcome back.
Here we are.
This is episode nine and most very importantly, it is Christmas Eve.
(00:40):
Or at least this is me released on Christmas Eve.
I can smell the fish.
The feast.
Do you do the feast of the seven fishes?
We do.
I don't know if we do all seven.
I think we substituted some stuff in there.
I don't know if we ever get to seven.
Yeah, I don't think we've ever got.
And I don't know if we ever do the traditional.
So the traditional ones are the cod, the cod with the tomatoes, which I always, if they don't soak it enough.
(01:08):
You got to soak the salt.
Or it's just that it's salty.
It's like eating a shoe.
So the cod, which is.
Cod, so, or the.
Calamari.
Calamari.
My dad always liked to do smelt.
Smelt, fried smelt.
I like, I still like doing that.
And I make, I have a Emeril Lagasse special, very, very fancy tartar sauce with the smelt.
(01:33):
Very good.
It's really good.
I will also do, I do, I have a dish.
It is a bacon wrapped scallop with a brie cream sauce.
Bring it.
I think that's, that's an added on.
It's awesome.
It counts.
I don't know if it's one of the seven, but it counts.
We got shrimp, right?
Shrimp is.
Shrimp cocktail.
That's an easy one.
Throw in there.
(01:53):
I don't know about your family, but did you guys do octopus or octopus salad or.
Now, I believe that's one of the fish.
But that stuff was really, my dad was the only one who liked it.
So there wasn't, and we didn't do like Christmas Eve.
We didn't do the, that stuff.
There was lots of food, but we didn't really do the fish.
So that's something.
We always did.
Yeah.
(02:13):
And I could be wrong.
This could be a segment, you know, back.
I was wrong.
In 10.
I don't think we did it in Italy.
No.
No.
Maybe it is an American.
I could be wrong.
I don't, I don't know.
I wasn't in Italy long enough to, to remember.
Right.
Check with mom.
I'm going to check with mom and dad and check with my sister, my, my sister-in-law's family.
(02:35):
Yeah.
Cause I, I remember asking once and they go, you know what?
We don't do that in Italy.
I don't know.
Maybe I'm wrong, but, but we do it here.
So we still do it.
Yep.
We now have a catered though.
That's nice.
Not catered, but we, we have.
You order it.
We order out.
Yeah.
We order it because it's too much.
It's a lot of work.
Yeah.
And with the frying, it's, it's also the thing that to do all that stuff, you got to do it right then.
(02:58):
Yeah.
So somebody's cooking the whole time.
Somebody's cooking.
So right after I leave the studio, I'm going to be going and picking up the fish.
There you go.
Go pick up the fish.
I'll pick up the fish.
Look, you know what Kelly will make a very nice.
She has a recipe for sea bass, which we do sometimes with, we're talking, this is really about, this isn't about a child and it's just about food.
(03:20):
It's Christmas Eve.
She does a recipe for sea bass with an olive tapenade.
Wow.
It is delicious.
Fantastic.
Okay.
Well, I got to try that.
And her fruit cake thing.
Either way.
So yes.
That, so, so it is, hopefully everybody's having a very merry Christmas Eve and enjoying their holidays, but yeah, here we are.
(03:44):
So as always.
I am Frank Cereo.
I'm 55 years old and my wife is 26 weeks pregnant and yeah, it's just going flying right by.
It's going buddy.
So the, the update for some reasons, I've looked at multiple websites to, for the weekly kind of the weekly size produce size produce.
(04:05):
Again, this week again is a cauliflower, which we talked about last time.
So size of a head of cauliflower.
Now she sleeps and wakes on a schedule.
So she has a sleeping and waking schedule in her little apartment there and my lovely wife, her, while her lungs are not fully developed still.
(04:27):
Okay.
But at this point she could breathe with help.
So just from one week to the next, the development is happening so quickly.
Seven days.
Look what happens.
That's it.
Seven days.
So week 26 had a cauliflower sleeping and waking on a schedule and lungs are developing and to the point where she could get by with a little help.
(04:49):
So that is all.
She's cooking up just fine.
I think so.
Yeah.
It's it's, it's funny.
I was, because preparing for the holidays and we're buying seems like all of a sudden there's more cookies around and stuff like that.
And I happen to, for those many people in my family know, but for those of you who don't know, when I was a kid, my dad was a distributor or Stella Doro cook.
(05:15):
I just saw them in the kitchen walking in.
And they're up there.
That's cookie.
Absolutely.
I was teasing Kelly saying you you're shaped like an S cookie now.
She's got the cute little belly.
But yeah, everything, everything seems to be moving along.
I'm telling you, I know, I know you're probably growing up with it, probably sick of just looking at him.
But the minute I walked in, I looked at that.
(05:37):
I'm like, I want to walk.
I haven't had him in such a long.
Honestly, the ones I liked the most were the Swiss fudge.
Oh yeah.
They were so good.
But that was, that was the thing was when he was, when he did that, we didn't get, we would get the, the stales.
So when he would, when something would expire before it's sold at like Williams or you'd come on the big lot or a broken package or something.
(06:00):
Yeah.
We got big lots now.
And it was never the Swiss fudge.
It was like the margaritas.
You know, what's funny is my brother to this day talking about food again.
He is, we are talking about, but he, he helped my father deliver the cookies when he was a kid and I was too little before I stopped doing that.
(06:21):
But my brother to this day can tell you which cookie and how many were on the shelf of the truck.
Wow.
He remembers it.
He will recite it occasionally when we get together right here was like, he can, he was still remembers it now 50 or 60 or 60 years later.
(06:43):
So it's out, it's on the counter.
Yeah.
I saw it.
Yeah.
There's cookies everywhere.
There's, there's some cookies out, but the S cookie may, I was teasing Kelly.
You're like, that's cookie.
Yeah.
So she's a, so she's got the shave.
She gets a little cute little belly, but the, but to now stop talking about food and start talking about the podcast and what we should be talking about our first segment, which I knew was going to be in everyone.
(07:07):
And here it is.
Once again, I was wrong.
So I was wrong this week from last episode, we discussed my deep fear of being involved in the birth of my child and how I thought, well, if it was a cesarean, we weren't sure what the protocol was.
(07:30):
Apparently I get to scrub in.
If I think I might've said you might just scrub in.
I get to, I'm astonished.
That they would want a lay person in there at all.
Like, can't you just like, they have to put her out.
Like, isn't she under assume again?
(07:50):
We don't know.
I don't know what happened.
My wife had ours naturally.
So I have no idea.
I don't know if it's a, I don't think it's a local, she's just talking to you.
The only thing I know for sure is the only thing I know for sure is in that case, there is in fact a curtain that I will be behind.
I believe that's so very true, but there, there you go.
(08:14):
So what are you hoping for?
No, you never want surgery.
No, it's always search surgery.
Whatever's best for the baby and easiest is what I want.
But yeah, that was immediately like, Oh yeah, no, you're you'll be there.
I'm like, fantastic.
Yeah.
There's no, there's no 1950 father anymore, but you were talking about having a cigar and having a martini here at the waiting room, right?
(08:36):
Unless you're just, you just want to start off the whole, the whole, uh, parenthood real bad.
It's like disappointing.
I'm leaving the room.
Disappointing everyone.
Yeah.
Just disappoint everyone.
Yeah.
Let me know when you're done.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
No, you'll be fine.
I'm sure.
But you were wrong.
I was wrong.
I was wrong.
It's good that you can see that.
I think there might be based on what happened last episode.
(08:58):
Yep.
We might have a new one that's called Kelly is never wrong because of the way she handled the controversy that has already been resolved of whether or not Carlo truly guessed the Lululemon backpack without going to four questions.
If I ever get in any legal trouble, I'm calling her.
(09:19):
That's it.
You should.
I'm not calling a lawyer.
I'm calling Kelly.
It was, it was fantastic the way she, I couldn't believe it.
I'm like, just write him a little note.
I don't recall Senator.
I will never write him a note.
She will never admit it.
No, it's fine.
We were both right.
Kelly.
That's that's true.
(09:39):
I know she's listening to this on the chair.
We're watching on her right now.
Watching it right now.
So there was, I was wrong.
So you're doctoring it up.
You're, you're doing all the, you're cleaning the hands.
You're putting on the, you're putting on the, uh, the scrubs.
You're, you're doing it all.
I don't know.
I didn't even like to wear a mask during COVID.
I don't want to do that, but we'll see.
(10:00):
That's no, it's, it's, it's gotta be.
Honestly, it's probably a lot easier to do that.
Cause you know, you're just, there's that, like you said, the blanket that's covering half the body.
Yup.
You're just talking to her up there or maybe not.
I don't know if she's awake or not.
I don't know what you're doing.
You could be just, just apologize.
(10:21):
Then, then the natural is natural.
You're going to be, you're going to be everybody's up and running.
Yeah.
So we'll see.
We'll see.
But that's, I was wrong.
We'll have the video going for the podcast in the room.
You know what I thought?
I thought about, I, and I talked to Kelly about this.
What I might do for that is, and you tell me what you think of this.
(10:41):
Sure.
I will.
What I told her was I'll have her find the most horrific video she could possibly find.
She'll do the research, find the video.
Okay.
And then have you ever seen like these videos of like Ben reacts to whatever?
Sure.
So we'll set up the two of us.
(11:02):
We'll sit in the home theater with a camera on us and the video will play.
So we won't, we won't show you the video.
Yeah.
But she, and that's the first thing Kelly said.
It was like, well, as long as we don't, we're not going to infringe on copyright.
She is a lawyer.
Why does this is what you think about?
But you're not thinking about your husband crying on camera.
(11:24):
Like, oh my God.
But so we could do that.
We could do a Frank feints live.
So the video is going to be of a, we'll have her find a video of a birth of a late.
And then we will play it in the home theater, but the camera, Oh, let's do that tonight.
I got the popcorn.
I want to see what happens to you.
We want to see if you run it.
(11:46):
We'll run it.
I will.
At the very least I'll be seated.
But yeah, I thought we could do it.
It'll be, that would be fun.
I'm in.
If I'd have to find the way I want to tie it into my Fitbit.
So you can watch my heart rate spike.
The wife's coming over for, for a podcast.
Maybe we can watch movie night.
(12:07):
We usually have movie night.
This will be a different movie night.
Different kind of movie night.
Well, I'm in, if you guys can figure that out, I'm in.
Okay.
So that we might do that in the future.
Oh, Kelly, she's getting into it now.
This is great.
I love it.
Yeah.
She's involved.
That's the executive producer level.
I got to give her the credit.
She's going to be our producer.
I'm going to have to have titles at the bot.
Yep.
Our lawyer.
(12:29):
Entertainment lawyer.
Entertainment lawyer.
All right, I'm in.
Copyright lawyer.
So the next segment that we're going to roll into now, again, a perennial favorite, the Silver Fox mailbox.
I love this part.
So the Silver Fox mailbox, really what we have to go over this time is, we're, it is, you know, this, this episode comes out on Christmas Eve.
(12:49):
Tomorrow, we will be putting out the results of the voting.
There's going to be an announcement tomorrow.
Yep, an announcement of our Name the Baby initiative.
So again, as a refresher, you could still vote until we're going to say midnight on Christmas Eve.
(13:12):
Okay.
That's the deadline.
I'm going to close the Google form.
So it's out there.
It's on the Google form.
We have, the possibilities are Carmella Rose, Gabriella Marie, Lucia, Sophia, Michaeline, Froot Loop, Jasmine Bubbles, Mariela, Madeline, Francesca Kelly, Josephine, Charlotte, Nicole, and Kiara.
(13:39):
And I will say, so far, the leader in the voting, and it's close, but the leader is, Josephine.
Wow.
Currently.
Okay.
Madeline is a close second.
Okay.
There's time, people.
But there's time.
You can get, if you get those votes in there, just get them in, and I will make us, we're going to have a special announcement tomorrow, but that's, that's where we are.
(14:04):
So far, it could be baby Josie.
I have no problem with that at all.
Although you desperately want it to be Madeline.
Well, yeah, for, for the sake of my home and health.
Happiness.
Happiness.
Your marriage.
But no, Josephine is also a family name for me.
So I'll be happy with a fake baby Josie.
Fake baby Josie.
(14:26):
That could be it.
It'll be better than Jasmine Bubbles.
Jasmine Bubbles or Carlina Louise.
Oh, that's right.
Carlina Louise.
Yeah, that was another one from our dear friend Dave.
From Dave.
Yeah.
That's right.
So that's our Silver Fox mailbox update.
And now we're going to move into, if this is the first time, a lot of work has gone into this one.
(14:50):
This is our first installment of the database.
Welcome to the inaugural episode of the database, where I'm going to try to learn from friends, dads that I don't know, people with different perspectives on parenting and different experiences.
(15:11):
And I am joined today by somebody whose work I've respected for many, many years, Mr. Paul Giamatti, ladies and gentlemen.
Pleasure to be here.
I've got a break between movies.
And I thought, what better place?
Working at that, what's that studio in Liverpool called?
Doing their latest film.
I'm the grumpy principal.
(15:35):
He could play that.
So in fact, this is not a Paul Giamatti, but he bears a striking resemblance to him.
This is John Taylor, a gentleman that I've known for now.
Over 25 years.
97 to 2002 was when I worked for Circuit.
(15:58):
So we met somewhere right around.
I mean, 98, 99.
Yeah, 98 or 99.
The better part of 25 years that we've known each other.
And we ended up initially playing in a band together briefly.
I joined an existing concern.
(16:19):
You did, but you traveled immense distances to make it happen.
It's true.
A testament to your dedication.
I enjoyed it very much.
So we've known each other for a very long time, most recently and also for quite a while now, 10 years.
We have worked together in the location-based entertainment business.
(16:40):
But I guess to start off, I think I'd like to hear just from your perspective.
What is the uniqueness of your dad, your fatherhood situation right now?
And a little bit about you generally.
Yeah, sure.
Thank you.
So obviously, the fact that I'm here hopefully implies that I am a dad.
(17:06):
I'm the youngest of four, and none of my siblings ended up having kids.
And I kind of, as life moved on, I kind of thought I wasn't going to have kids.
Even prepared my mom that, hey, sorry, mom is on the cards.
You're not going to be in the grandma business.
You are not going to be a grandmother.
And as luck would have it, you know, life found a way to go my way.
(17:31):
And I did end up meeting someone and getting married.
And we had a kid right before I turned 40.
So I snuck a kid in right at 39.
So still a little bit older, dad.
Yeah, yeah, no, I was definitely nervous about that for sure at that time.
And now I do have an eight-year-old.
(17:54):
I am currently I am divorced.
So I'm a single dad who does get along very amicably.
Good, good co-parenting situation.
Yeah, it's every day is it's cliche, but every day is an adventure.
Having a child leading right up to an eight-year-old where I'm at now.
So I mean, it's interesting because it's as common now kind of 50-50, right?
(18:18):
To be in a single dad, single mom situation.
Yeah.
As you know, as a married couple or a committed couple with kids.
But I do think that's obviously a different perspective.
And you kind of have you have both, right?
So you have kind of when you were together in the early days with Jacob.
Yeah.
And then now kind of the day-to-day and managing co-parenting that I think is going to make your perspective unique.
(18:45):
Yeah.
And one of the things that I do think when I think about our history together and you with Jacob, the memory that comes back to me first is a couple of weeks before.
Well, it was just we worked together, John and I.
John's working in the same location, one of the locations that I manage.
(19:06):
I was there officing, you know, in that spot.
So we saw each other a lot.
And John had just completed like a coaching conversation with an employee and I was that I kind of I didn't feel great about.
And we were having one of those developmental conversations that we sometimes have.
And I said, and I was just like, look, just do me a favor.
(19:27):
Just never have a kid, never have a kid.
Because if you do, you will destroy that child.
Like, just don't do it.
You can't communicate to this way.
And like two weeks later to not even I think it was really close.
And John comes in, he's like, I'm going to I'm going to be a father.
I'm like, immediately I thought back to that.
I'm like, oh, my God.
(19:48):
And I have to say very I'm very pleased to have been completely wrong.
Jacob's a great kid, you know, and he seems like he's healthy and and doing really well and thriving.
And it's great.
The few opportunities I've had to interact with him.
He's a good kid.
So but I do I think when I'm like, why did I have this?
(20:09):
It is funny.
It's funny how it happens.
It was so purely from a position of self-interest for me.
Yeah.
What do you think?
What was the biggest challenge you faced in the like the early months of the first few months of of fatherhood?
Yeah, sure.
(20:29):
Well, one very interesting fact is prior to my own child, I had never held a baby before.
That that's something.
So I was it was all new to me.
And no exposure whatsoever.
None.
Wow.
So I had as little experience as you could possibly have.
(20:52):
Right.
Starting with a clean slate.
That's good.
And I would say it's the scary part is how, you know, the way the hospital goes.
There is essentially there's two things that you have to have covered in order to go home with the baby.
So you're in the hospital.
You've got the baby and you you need two things.
(21:15):
You need to watch a 1970s video on not to shake your baby.
And you need to have a car seat.
And those are the only.
That's the bar.
Literally the only prerequisites for them to allow you to go home.
Okay.
And and you get home that night and it's you just it's impossible not to feel like, how could they let this happen?
(21:40):
How could they send us?
Why did they trust us with this?
It's it's impossible not to feel that way.
And those early nights, you know, we you know, we had the we had the bassinet.
You know, you get all the things that you think you need.
You had all the stuff.
Yeah.
And and we put the baby in the bassinet and the baby did not want to be in the bassinet.
(22:02):
And the bassinet was supposed to be this thing that we needed.
And it it just turned out to not be a thing that we needed.
And so those early days, I think it was just a learning all the things that you prepare for.
Some of them are going to be great.
You know, he ended up sleeping in this very.
(22:23):
It almost like was shaped like kind of skinny, like a green bean.
And it was on two two kind of rocking legs.
But it kind of ensconced him at the sides.
And that ended up being like.
That was the thing.
It was far cheaper than the bassinet.
But that was what he liked to sleep in.
Right.
(22:43):
So, yeah.
So did did your wife have experience with little kids?
No, no.
What was very interesting is while obviously a lovely person, never really had much interaction with kids.
And one of the one of the early things I noticed, we were we were cashing out in a grocery in the grocery store and we're in the line.
(23:07):
And I mean, it's stuck out to me like like a lightning bolt.
The way she was interacting with, you know, there's somebody in front of you in line with a cart.
It's a mom with a young child.
And the way she just.
Became a completely different person.
(23:27):
And the way she was interacting with these little kids, it was also engaging with children prior to that.
I mean, they if they were there, it was just gray static, just completely unaware of these things.
And I was the same way.
I have a buddy who's got older teens.
And, you know, I've I've known him for over 20 years as well.
(23:50):
And I was friends when, you know, when he had kids and the kids were there, but they were just, again, static background.
They just didn't notice them.
Yeah.
And then everything does it just it just changes.
That's got to be interesting.
So those initial challenges were literally like you starting from ground up with.
(24:11):
Yeah.
I mean, I had to be doing all I had changed diapers, hadn't done, you know, bottles, hadn't.
Was there a clear?
Who was better at it?
Because you were both kind of equally inexperienced.
Yeah.
Was was your wife so of a natural at it than you?
I mean, she is amazing at at all of it.
(24:35):
OK.
And I will say, I mean, I I'm so fortunate at how good she is at things.
I was very good at getting him to sleep.
Really?
Yeah.
You were the one who could get him to fall asleep.
I am.
So I can.
It's the dulcet tones of your voice.
It could be.
(24:55):
I I I remember the early days.
I would kind of go robotic in the sense of like, OK, I'm going to pick you up and I am going to walk in a track throughout the home.
Which is not as big as a track outside.
And I'm just going to walk on this track, kind of rocking you and walking through this until you fall asleep.
(25:22):
And whether it takes five minutes, 15 minutes, a half hour.
This is all I am just the world got very small and all you you're kind of forced to see what's right in front of you.
I think what's interesting is the things you will be able to accomplish that you in a million years didn't think like you're like, oh, my gosh, I'm not going to be able to change diapers or I'm not going to be able to do this.
(25:43):
And you just somehow do.
You just figure it out.
But yeah, she I mean, she was amazing is continues to be amazing at everything.
But yeah, I think bedtime and going to sleep.
That was your thing.
That was your superpower.
Yeah.
Getting them to sleep.
So was there anything that.
(26:04):
In those first few months that you thought I I wish I had done whatever that thing is before before he was born, like what was the was there that if only I had done X.
Oh, that's a good question.
I had a lot of books that I don't think I read.
(26:25):
I've already experienced.
I definitely I look I I read through some of the stuff.
It isn't to say I didn't read anything, but there are so so many books out there.
There is literally I'm constantly talking about it.
I have this list of books stack now.
And Kelly is a voracious reader.
So she's tearing through the stuff and they just go into my pile.
(26:48):
I've been almost exclusively like there were four dog like books on how to introduce the dogs to the baby for just on that.
And finally, after like three, I didn't I just gave up.
I'm like, I'm not reading the fourth one.
But yeah, there's there's a tremendous amount of reading.
And yeah, so I can picture that.
(27:09):
So you were like looking for the yeah, the bold passages.
And I mean, the high is everything is with hindsight.
There was and to be unhelpful, I'm not going to remember the app, but there was an app that I remember we had that I don't I don't think it was called the Wonder Years, but it basically it mapped out their brain.
(27:35):
Kind of by day and week and month, and it was almost a pregnancy, the development.
No, no, this is when they're very little.
And it it essentially it lined up when your kid was going to be really or basically it was like a weather app.
(27:58):
And it would it would it graphically use like storm clouds and and all these things.
And I wish I was making this up.
It lined up because you look at at your partner and you're like, this is this is insane.
What is happening right now?
Why?
Why is everything so crazy?
And then you would look and you're like, oh, we're in one of the we're in one of the storm cloud patches.
(28:21):
So it's like over like it would be like a week that, oh, this is a danger week.
Yeah.
And it was accurate.
I got to find out what I was.
I will.
Afterwards, we'll do some research because I promise you that sounds invaluable.
It was it was helpful because I guess, yeah, you can't really prepare, read, read about this.
But, you know, being prepared for all the things that you're going to unexpectedly go through.
(28:47):
Gotcha.
That's interesting.
So, yeah, but yeah, yeah.
That would be the forecast app.
I'll find out what the name is.
And do the reading, basically.
Oh, yeah.
OK.
Everyone has, you know, you you think you feel because you're in it.
You feel like, oh, my gosh, nobody's ever gone through this until you realize that basically most everyone has gone through this.
(29:12):
Yeah, there's the one book that I'm finally in now is the one that everybody's supposed to read.
What to expect when you're expecting.
I think that was the one.
And already because I started because I started it so much later because of all the dog books, I'm now reading about what has already happened in the pregnancy.
And I'm like, I wish I knew.
Yeah, it would have made things easier.
(29:32):
So I guess I definitely get that.
So no experience baby wrangling before Jacob arrived on the scene.
Yeah.
So what is the what is there a hack?
Is there a trick?
Is there something that you did learn once Jacob arrived?
That is like the thing that so, you know, I would say.
(29:53):
So the funny thing is, is one of the early nights where you're alone, you've got the baby and you're just like, I don't I don't know what to do here.
I remember I was I had him in his little swaddle and I'm we were taking kind of turns to get sleep.
And it's like the middle of the night and I'm walking and he just won't sleep.
And I, you know, I put him on top of the stove and I just remember looking at him like, why is this happening?
(30:22):
You know, before picking him up and walking.
But I took that.
The stove wasn't on.
The stove was not on.
There's nothing controversial about this.
But I do I do distinctly remember.
That's an image.
And putting him, you know, on top of this stove and just under that that sort of dome light that they have.
And just looking at this baby like, what is it like?
(30:42):
What is happening?
Trying, trying to trying to get this.
But the thing we learned and that we were very fortunate and every child is going to be completely different.
But we got we were very if we were good at anything due to our inexperience, the one thing we were good at was consistency.
We were, I mean, probably to a fault.
(31:05):
We were so consistent about we tracked all of the feedings, all of the diaper changes, naps, same times every day, bedtime, same time every day.
And just we just stayed very, very pattern based, consistent.
So at that point, is it pretty much just your choice?
(31:27):
It's not like you have to convince the kid to go to bed at that point.
It's just that's.
So in at the very beginning, you have to teach the baby what daytime and nighttime is.
OK.
They don't know what that is.
And to give a little backstory, my son was born.
It was it was a very scary incident.
(31:48):
So he's born.
And the moment he's born, like five plus people rush into the room and take him away.
Really?
Yeah.
Inexplicably, you don't know what's going on.
It's already the scariest thing I've ever seen.
Sure.
And then they rush in, take him away.
I'm looking at my wife.
(32:09):
She's looking at me.
We're both like, what?
We don't know what's happening.
And nobody's telling like nobody tells.
In the moment that I don't remember, I don't have a memory of it.
Right.
OK.
It wasn't it wasn't long.
We're told that the baby probably felt like it was terrifying.
It was terrifying.
Baby swallowed meconium.
(32:30):
Oh, meconium.
That is a word that Carlo keeps mistaking for what killed Superman.
So that so this happened during during childbirth.
Yeah.
Or yeah, or like during the birth or right before the birth.
I'm not sure how how close it was, but I think it was during the birth.
And so they rush in because they have to clear that out.
(32:52):
It's right.
And yeah, that can be very bad.
Yes.
So he ends up spending five days in the NICU.
Oh, wow.
All due to that.
Yes.
Wow.
And like, you know, you're talking like the little incubator with the tape and all the stuff.
And you can't really interact.
No.
And I've you know, I've long maintained if I was ever to become a millionaire, I would give every penny to the NICU nurses at Crouse Hospital.
(33:21):
Because when I tell you that place is unlike any that specifically the NICU ward and the people who work there.
I mean, I've never been in such a an almost heavenly place that the quiet, the tranquility, the peace, the kindness, because everyone there is not there for a good reason.
(33:45):
And the nurses there are just.
I mean, nurses are nothing short of miracle workers.
That's fantastic.
So we are back from our first installment of the database.
So that is our time spent with John Taylor.
First part of that interview.
And what did you think?
First of all, love John.
(34:07):
John Taylor, not of Duran Duran.
Is that one of the?
John Taylor's of Duran Duran.
Oh, okay.
So when people thought, they're going to have John Taylor on it.
Yeah.
You got Duran Duran talking about fatherhood.
Yeah.
They're like, that's not John Taylor.
John Taylor.
Yeah.
I thought that was, I thought that was a funny part.
There's some, some real stuff in there that I remember happening.
(34:30):
Because I, again, I was working with you guys.
Yeah.
We were all, we were kind of all together at that point.
And yeah.
And I did when he, as soon as he said meconium, I'm like, oh my God.
I love talking about that for three episodes.
Yeah.
We looked at each other and we just started laughing.
And then I remembered, yeah.
I remember the doctor saying that to us, uh, with our first.
(34:52):
And I just, you just forget, you know, you forget it.
Nothing happened luckily to our child.
So it was like in and out.
This could happen.
It didn't happen.
So we never thought about it again until our second one didn't happen either.
So, but it was funny when I was watching him going, oh my God, that's right.
I remember that they said, if this happens, they're going to have to take the baby away and all that good stuff.
(35:12):
And, and I'm glad it obviously didn't work.
Like when he said that immediately, like immediately I kind of chuckled because of hearing meconium.
But then when he talks about it, like it had to be absolutely terrifying.
You go from this intense experience to the kids gone.
Like they just, they swoop in and take the kid and then five days in the NICU.
(35:33):
And yeah, that had to be absolute.
Like, like I have these nothing's happening and I'm getting terrified.
So in a situation like that, like, yeah, that had to be absolutely.
That happened to us.
Yeah.
So remember when I told you the, our first was almost three weeks early.
Yes.
So when, when they had, when my wife had the baby, someone said to the doctor, oh, it's it's three something.
(36:01):
It's it's preemie or something.
Cause it was a small, it was very small.
And the doctor was like, oh my God, grabbed them.
And they were talking amongst each other.
So we don't know what's going on.
We just see the doctor taking the baby, bringing them to like the other side of the room.
Right.
The baby's not crying yet.
Right.
Right.
Oh no.
(36:21):
Yeah.
The baby's not.
So I'm, I'm like, oh my God, something's wrong.
Then I hear the crying.
So, okay.
I got that.
So right.
Like you said, it's 15 seconds.
It lasts in your mind three days.
It's, it's, it's, it's eternity.
Right.
So obviously you hear the crying.
So it's not that, then like you're freaking out.
Then I hear, then I hear somebody going, oh, it's, it's two and a half weeks.
(36:43):
Early.
The doctor goes, oh, okay.
And that told him, okay.
His lungs are probably.
Yeah.
That's a big difference.
Right.
It's a huge difference.
So it went from real, you know, like, oh my God, let's figure this out.
Five to about, oh, okay.
So it's just a small baby.
Right.
Just a, you know, two, two and a half weeks.
Right.
So yes, very scary.
(37:03):
So I couldn't even imagine.
Yeah.
With John just five days away.
No one's explaining it.
Yeah.
Yup.
Yup.
Yeah.
No, it was great.
So I enjoyed it.
Hopefully you guys did too.
We'll, we'll, we'll have more of that interview coming in the future.
Um, but for now we get to move on.
This is only the second time we will have done this segment.
(37:25):
We're going to move on to the diaper diet.
So if you recall, let's get real.
Last time we talked about this, I was there.
So the whole idea again is I'm trying to lose weight as Kelly is gaining weight with the baby and trying to stay ahead of it.
(37:46):
So last time I was behind in the race by 1.2 pound.
So I had, she had gained like 12.4 at that point and I had lost 11.2. So I was down by 1.2. So it's been three or four weeks.
Okay.
And, but there was, I want to qualify.
(38:07):
I want to qualify that there was a Thanksgiving in there.
Now the good part was it was a Thanksgiving at my brother's house.
So there wasn't that much of a challenge.
Okay.
But because when it's at home, it's just horrible.
But anyway, so I avoided a lot of leftover, that kind of stuff.
So what do you think?
Where, where do you think?
(38:27):
I was optimistic that I was going to be able to start catching up maybe.
But as we've talked about, you talked about her appetite has increased.
So, and the last time we talked about, she gained 12.1. She had gained, I was behind by 1.2. She had gained at that point 12.4 pounds and I had lost 11.2. Now this is, this is women.
(38:51):
It's different than us.
Right.
I mean, we, we, we go on a diet, we lose like 30 pounds in a week.
And they're like, I lost two pounds in six months.
It's a lot harder for them, but she's putting it, you know, she's going the other direction.
Gaining could be a lot easier.
Again, I have not seen her.
So do not, do not take this like offensive.
Like this is tough.
Cause yeah, you haven't seen her.
Not seen her.
I'm going to say from what you're telling me, the, the, the eating and stuff, I'm going to say she probably gained three pounds.
(39:17):
Oh no.
Oh really?
Yeah.
So more the game.
Yeah.
So now the, you might be in trouble.
I'm now behind by nine pounds.
Oh, and I still lost another three.
So she went, she is now up 23.2 pounds.
(39:41):
Okay.
And I am nine pounds behind.
So I've lost a little over 14.
So both of you, it's good.
I'm good for her.
Yeah.
Like she, I think she's like, she's doing very well.
She's doing very well.
It's not like she doesn't, she isn't blowing up.
She's got a nice little baby bump.
It's been good.
Now, this last, the last week, and we'll talk about some of the challenges when we get into the next, her, her, her eating has changed a little bit, but yeah, so that, that's where we are right now.
(40:12):
She's plus 20.
23.2. 23.
And I said three pounds.
So I was off by a lot.
Yeah.
Well, over the course of a month in this stage of the pregnancy, this is when you start to put on the weight.
That's awesome.
So, yeah, so she's doing well, but, but I got a tough road to home.
I, yeah, I do have to say, I did see her last week.
Right.
(40:32):
After the show.
Yeah.
Yeah, you did.
And she looked good.
So I guess I didn't.
Yeah.
So it's all being Kelly.
It's all baby.
Yeah.
So congratulate to you too.
I mean, I'm telling you, and we talked about this before.
I did not do any losing weight when my wife was pregnant.
Both times.
There was no losing weight.
It has been a little, little by little.
(40:54):
Hopefully I can, I don't know if I'm able to catch up, but we'll see.
Yeah.
But I'm down, I'm down nine.
So you have any weight loss tips for aging fathers?
Let me know.
Yeah.
But we'll see.
So that is the diaper diet.
And now we will move on to what just happened.
(41:15):
So in the last week, lots of little things that again, pregnancy wise, not a lot going on right now.
No, kind of slow.
Yeah.
Now, next week, we're going to have some more doctor's appointment stuff.
That'll be fine.
Sure.
Something like that.
So what one interesting thing that has happened in the last week there, there's always, as you know, every time you come here, there's a stack of packages from Amazon.
(41:45):
I just took a photo.
I laughed.
I took a photo.
There's a lot.
I might just, I'll share that.
I'll send it to you.
Part of this is a function of, of just the baby and stuff.
The other part is we do a lot of our Christmas shopping online.
Sure.
And things are just showing up.
(42:06):
So I can't, if it says Kelly on the package, I know could be mine.
Gotcha.
Could be someone else's.
You don't want to open it.
But I can't take any chances.
So I just leave a stack and I'm like, okay.
And then they go into the guest room.
Sure.
So the guest room is literally, you'll have to look, it's full, but big box shows up.
Okay.
(42:26):
And I'm like, what the heck is this?
And, and I ask, and Kelly says, oh, that might be the chair.
I'm like chair.
So I open it up and Kelly's sister is clearly going to be a very enthusiastic.
Oh yeah.
Aunt.
(42:48):
And she's like, you gotta look at it.
This is a Snoopy chair.
It's, it is custom.
Of course.
Has the baby's name on the chair.
It's like white and red, like Snoopy's dog house.
Sure.
And it's like a child size, but like for a three-year-old to sit in like a, like a bark lounger, like it's, it's, it's adorable.
(43:09):
You gotta store this for the next three years.
You know, I'm like, where do we put it?
Thanks.
And Kelly, I mean, this is like, I told her she's cut off.
Like she can't, she has to stop, but it's, it's adorable.
At least have gifts that are age appropriate.
Already, still not even born yet and already has custom furniture.
Yeah.
You're wow.
(43:30):
Well, you'll probably find a little place in the room, right?
Sure.
Yeah.
Or three years later.
In her dorm.
Like, I don't know.
It's cute.
It's going to be adorable.
So there's, there is that.
That's funny.
Yeah.
You're going to, you're going to see, but they've already, well, they have, uh, she has brothers that have children or at least one brother who has, who has two.
(43:54):
So this is the first time the sister is probably very close.
And this is the first, she doesn't have a, she doesn't have a kids herself.
So this is different, right?
The sister, the sister.
Yes.
That's the thing.
Yeah.
So you got to watch out for her.
Cause she's going to have gifts all over your house.
I'm sure it'll be, it'll be good.
Yeah.
But that's super cute.
Yeah.
Super cute.
So we had that.
The thing I thought when I always, I will talk with Kelly before we record these.
(44:19):
So what's, what, what do we talk about from this week?
Like, what do you think are the notable?
And she's like, well, she's been moving and grooving, moving and grooving.
So we've been moving and grooving.
There's a lot of activity in there and on a kind of a regular schedule.
So that, that has been good.
I was going to, no, I was going to say this.
(44:40):
Kelly had noticed certain things that are like on TV or music that the baby moves more or, you know, is there something that's triggering it more than other things?
I don't know if she has, has noticed anything like that.
Not yet.
Okay.
But she's noticing that there's kind of typical behavior at certain times of day.
(45:00):
Yep.
She does Pilates for a little while.
But so there's that, that stuff.
The, the, the bad thing is this week unrelated to the, well, I guess tangentially related to the, the pregnancy, but she's had a really bad cold this week and she can't take anything.
Right.
So she can't take, she's had a sore throat.
(45:21):
She's got a cough.
She can't take, can't take any cough medicine.
She can't do any of that.
So she's been having a hard time and it's, I will, this is one, this is a very strange thing.
And I almost, I feel bad even bringing it up, but I'm going to, because it's funny or at least it's a little funny.
Because we have a podcast and we talk about everything.
(45:42):
The first time this ever happened, we were, we were in London.
We had gone on a trip to London.
Okay.
It was in the, it was around this time of year.
And so we're going to all these London, there's all these Christmas markets and beautiful, it's a great city.
And so we're out in the cold and, and, and spending time and she came down with a little bit of a cold.
(46:04):
So we're staying, we're staying in this place and Knight's Bridge.
It's a really nice part of London.
And we're there and she's, we just, she needed some cold medicine.
So we go to, there's a drug store on the corner.
We go down there and the, you don't think about this, but you're in another country.
Right.
There's no like NyQuil.
(46:25):
Sure.
It's all these weird brands.
Right.
There's stuff, right.
So there's this thing called night nurse.
Right.
Okay.
And we were asking the girl at the counter and they're like, yeah, that's the closest thing to night, whatever.
Night nurse.
So she takes it, we go to sleep and, and I keep waking up to her making these noises.
(46:47):
These like literally, and it's not like a cold noise, like a snore.
Right.
It's like a, like, like.
Whining, like a.
Like non-verbal complaining.
Oh, like in pain.
Like, like these whiny sounds.
Oh, okay.
But it's like, it's disconcerting.
(47:07):
I'm like, I'm like, are you okay?
And she's like, she has no idea.
She's asleep, but she's making these noises.
And I attributed that to the, to the night nurse.
So we're like, we're never taking that again.
No.
So never hasn't.
Now this was a few years ago.
We were in London like three, four years ago.
Has not happened since, but it was not the night nurse.
(47:31):
Apparently the last couple of nights.
The nurse is back?
Yeah.
It's the weirdest thing.
She will just like, as soon as she falls asleep, make these little squeaky noises.
So when I first got married, Trina would talk in her sleep.
I did not know this.
(47:51):
Okay.
Right.
So I would freak out because there was conversations in bed and I'm thinking, are, are, are we doing talk time now?
Like, do we, I thought we were napping and I'd turn around and she would be asleep.
Like you said, and I'm like, Oh, she's a talker.
Yeah.
She's one of those.
(48:12):
Yeah.
And she did it for a while.
Did they make sense?
No.
Okay.
No, no.
It was clear.
Yeah.
I mean, I knew you could hear what you were saying.
You had no idea what it was completely.
And for some reason, I don't know.
I could be in my head screwing this up, but I don't know if the pregnancy changed it.
She does.
(48:32):
She doesn't do it anymore.
You know why?
Cause she's happy.
Now she's happy.
Before she was like, who am I in bed with?
She was confused.
And another thing about pregnancy, my wife, all her life, we got married up to the point where she got pregnant.
Her hair was, you couldn't even curl it.
(48:54):
It was just straight hair.
I know you probably got straight.
That's it.
Really?
She would curl it.
Like if we were going out to a dance or a wedding or whatever it was, she would curl it within like an hour.
It's straight hair.
Right.
And she gets pregnant and she has curly hair from that moment on 23 years now.
Really?
Plus she's never, her hair never straightened out again.
(49:17):
It turned curly.
That's interesting.
The whole thing changed.
When I first met her to, like I said, to when she got pregnant straight hair, straight hair.
That's interesting.
Yeah.
Things change.
So I don't know.
What do you, what do you think that you think she's, is she trying to talk?
No, like she is.
So like in the beginning when we were first together, she would do the talking thing, but it was like in the morning, like right when you're getting her wake up.
(49:45):
And I discovered because she would say things that made absolute, again, clear as a bell.
Right.
But it may just made no sense.
And that was, it was like when you're in that twilight of waking up.
Cause so that was that.
But this thing was only happened when we were in London.
And now this, this time.
And both times sick.
(50:06):
Yes.
Sick with a cold.
With a cold.
Like a sore throat.
This time there's no medicine at all in her.
No, she can't have anything.
So it's not, it's not.
No night nurse.
Huh?
So yeah.
So it's, it's gotten better.
But to the point where the one, like I had, I crammed in earplugs.
Really?
I, it was way.
And I sleep pretty soundly and I had to put them in her.
(50:28):
It was, it was, I wasn't getting any sleep.
Come says the man who rattles the world when he used to sleep.
So in my defense, uh, what inside was referring to is we had gone, we had gone out.
We had gone to see a, to a formula one race in Montreal.
We shared a room with, with another friend.
(50:52):
And I remember I snore a lot.
I always did snored.
I was not, I thought it was just like, I snore.
So what?
And you told us you go up.
I said, I warned him that would happen.
That was the way when I would have to travel in the type of work that I did with retail, you'd have to go to meetings.
And that was the way I always got a single instead of having to bunk with somebody because I snore.
(51:14):
They like, if you put somebody with me, they're not going to get any sleep.
Cause I snore like a tractor and that would always get me up.
So I, I warned them.
But I remember the next morning we woke up and you said something to the effect of, you don't snore, you die a little.
I sure did.
Because for some reason I, I, I thought I was going to sleep that night and I went to bed and I had to, I got woken up by, by this sound and I, I literally could not close my eyes and I just stared at him going, I'm, he's going to die tonight.
(51:54):
It was, I don't know if he knows that or not.
Not long after that, my doctor suggested that I get a sleep study done.
Yes.
Cause she's like, do you snore?
Yeah.
Do you ever wake up?
Yeah.
So did your friend ever think you were going to die?
Yeah.
So I did this, I do the sleep test and they, they tell you that like, I think the number is maybe 10 or 15 an hour, 10 or an hour.
(52:19):
I was having, I was having like 65, like every minute my airway was closing.
She's like, oh yeah, you need to, you need a CPAP.
So I've been, I have a CPAP that I've been using, but it's nice and quiet.
Oh no, no, no.
Yeah, yeah.
You're good.
That, that is something that never has been inflicted upon.
Upon Kelly.
I've had a CPAP since before we met.
(52:41):
That story comes back in my mind every time I hear like a, you know, somebody snoring or something that immediately goes back to that hotel room and you just, and the other guy, our other friend's sleeping like a baby.
Yeah, it didn't bother him.
Didn't even.
Cause the rest, the rest of the world doesn't know.
No, me, I'm like staring at him going, I'll be here if anything happens to you, my friend.
(53:03):
I will be ready to pounce on your chest.
Yeah.
It was some ribs.
It was bad.
It was, but no, I'm like, that's the thing.
That's the good part now is with a CPAP, you, you know, you have, I don't, you have different kinds.
I have one that's a full mass.
It covers my nose and my mouth.
I have headgear.
It's fantastic.
But I put it on there and it's nice and quiet.
But when the thing that's, the thing is it's pumping air.
(53:25):
It's, it's kind of like inflating your airway so it doesn't collapse.
So because I want to get away from the sound, I've got earplugs in, I put on my CPAP and then I can pull, I can pull the covers up over my head.
Cause it's like a snorkel.
It's like, it's feeding you air.
So I'm literally like giving myself a Dutch oven so I can get away from the sound.
(53:49):
Oh my God.
You got headphones.
You got a mask on your face.
You got Dutch oven.
It's a, we're a wreck.
Oh, we're going to have a child.
How did, oh God, it's so good.
Oh, I'm not laughing.
I'm, I'm just laughing.
Yeah.
You just, you don't even see me.
There's just a big bump.
That's so good.
And a hose for the CPAP.
That's it.
(54:09):
So there's a vacuum in my head.
That's it.
Oh, you just hear the little whoosh, the whoosh of the CPAP.
God, I love Kelly.
That's, she's fantastic.
She just looks, you can go, you need to impregnate me.
I'm just, I'm hoping, I'm hoping that she's going to feel better with the cold stuff.
But very interesting about that.
(54:30):
So there's, there's that.
So yeah.
And yeah, I'm really hoping the talking goes away.
It is very disconcerting.
It is just.
Carlo was not that right.
He was still a little wrong.
Shut up, go to bed.
That's it.
So there's, there was that.
Then the one thing we did in between her not feeling well, we have, we have, and I wanted to ask about kind of Christmas traditions.
(54:55):
One Christmas tradition that we have since we moved here.
We moved into the house that we live in now, where the studio is here.
We've been here for, well, one, two, three, four.
This will be our fifth Christmas.
Yeah, it doesn't seem like that long.
But somewhere or another, I got the idea back in the first year, the first Christmas, that we would go by, because we have kind of a big yard, and we went and bought a little Christmas, like a bald Christmas tree.
(55:29):
From Hafer's, we went to a local, local place, picked out a little Christmas tree.
And I set it up kind of in our backyard, where we can see it from the roof off the deck.
And put, put little Christmas lights on it.
And then in the spring, I plant it.
Oh, okay.
And I've been planting them along the driveway.
Christmas tree.
So now we have four Christmas trees, because every year we do that.
(55:50):
So we went and got our Christmas tree.
Okay.
And we were thinking like, this will be something that we're going to get to do.
Absolutely.
With the baby, every year we'll go, and it'll be a fun thing.
So now it's just the two of us.
We go and we pick out the tree.
But so we'll have that tradition for Christmas, for every Christmas, we'll do that.
That's cute.
I like that.
And then you, it's like a reset.
Then you plant it.
(56:11):
So now it becomes, yeah.
Yeah, so now it's good.
Now it's, we're just in the point, the first one I planted way out toward the road, is now getting to be big enough that I can't put lights.
Like, it took like four net lights to light it.
So I'm going to, but that's why I put Christmas lights on them.
Do you guys use real trees in the house, or do you have a fake?
No, in the house we have two fake ones.
(56:32):
Doesn't say you can chop these down and use them now in your house.
We, you could do, there's a service.
I was telling my brother about this.
The new thing for Christmas trees, instead of, if you want a real tree.
Okay.
What they do is, it's a subscription service.
Of course.
So they bring you a tree.
You pick a tree, a bald tree, root ball.
(56:53):
They bring it.
You decorate it.
It's your tree.
Then after Christmas, you call them up.
They come and get the tree.
They bring it back.
They plant it again.
It grows.
Next year you get the same tree back.
It's a little bigger.
Oh my God.
And you do that year after year after year.
That's your Christmas tree.
And then when it's too big for your house, they bring it and you plant it.
(57:17):
I think that's great.
That's a cute idea.
That's a very cute idea.
I have no idea what that costs and I will never do it.
Probably a lot.
But you're kind of doing it.
Well, I'm doing, but we, we get it and we plant that in the spring, like right away.
But yeah, so there's all kinds of fun.
And it's so funny.
That tradition that you started is going to, as awesome as it is, you look forward to it.
When you put the child now.
(57:38):
Oh, it's going to be so much fun.
Yeah.
It changes that whole thing.
Cause then it's going to be like, that's her first tree.
That's awesome.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
First tree.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's going to be fun.
That will be fun.
So are there, I'm, I'm particularly interested in the, are there things that you did with the boys when they were little, like that we came like, what were the Christmas things that you did with them when they were little?
(58:00):
The one thing Trina always make sure that you keep these traditions going because it's, you know, if it was me, I'd probably give up a little bit.
And I know that about me.
That's why you have a partner that can pick up what you.
I, in this situation, I'm in our relationship.
I'm Trina.
You're Trina.
I'm the one who was like, we, this is something.
(58:22):
So Christmas, you know, the cinnamon rolls, there's the orange, orange cinnamon rolls, orange flavor, orange, orange flames.
Okay.
Okay.
So every year, I don't know why, how it started.
Maybe when she was young, they did it.
I'm not sure.
She'll remind me in the morning.
She'll bake these.
So we wake up to the smell of the cinnamon orangey kind of smell.
(58:44):
So we all know now we get our presents Christmas Eve with our family, but then we keep ours for the kids at the house and we open up our presents.
We have our hot cocoa, our coffee, the pastries that she just made, and we'll open up the gifts and then you'll play around a little bit.
(59:05):
Then we'll all get ready and we go to church.
Awesome.
Yeah.
So that's a neat, that's a neat thing.
That was a neat thing.
And then as we got older, now our traditions now, not now, but in the last probably decade or so is we all go to midnight mass.
So that is our tradition.
That's neat.
(59:25):
So now that's one of the things that Kelly talks about is she's from Buffalo and she was, and she was saying that when, when growing up, they would always go to midnight mass at the Basilica.
There's a beautiful Basilica in Buffalo.
I've never been.
Have you been there?
No, but I mean, we have one in Syria.
(59:46):
So they do, they would have like a full choir and all the, all the music.
And she's like, we should, we should do that.
So you must go to midnight mass at Pompeii.
I have been to midnight mass there not in a long time.
That it's a beautiful, beautiful church.
And they do all the points set.
It's like, it's gorgeous.
(01:00:07):
Absolutely gorgeous.
Yeah.
So that's our tradition.
That's neat.
And it's so funny.
You think these things, I think you might think these things don't matter, but then you stop and the kids go, wait a minute, why are we going to midnight mass?
Wait a minute.
Where's the, you know, the hot cocoa or the orange scented going through the house.
So it does, you gotta keep doing it.
(01:00:29):
It means so much for the kids and yourselves, because you're going to look back and go, oh my God, we used to do this, that, and the other.
And I miss it.
And you know, but it's, but the midnight mass is probably a great way to start your Christmas.
I think that it's going to be fun to come up with new traditions.
The tree is something.
Then you guys are going to come up with new ones.
(01:00:50):
Yeah, that's right.
So far, our traditions is a couple.
We do the one that my favorite is Kelly makes.
She uses the cinnamon brioche bread and makes French toast.
See again, food traditions.
But yeah, traditions are, you got to keep them going.
Yeah.
And you'll have my, my baby's first or the baby's first tree.
(01:01:12):
Oh yeah.
All that stuff.
We have them all.
And every year, every year when we put the tree up, we have the kids put up their stuff and we go through the pictures that they made in first grade.
And we can put on the tree and you see all these years.
Yep.
And it's crazy because, you know, now my son is six foot one and whatever.
And he goes, the tree looks small.
(01:01:32):
I go, no, you're just bigger.
Same tree.
Because you're a giant now.
You're a giant now.
You used to have to get up on a chair to put the star up.
No, it's funny because we just trimmed the tree the other day and I have this little, it was probably like, it was probably some ornament that my mother got at Kmart.
It was, it's just a little felt, little plastic elf, little guy.
(01:01:58):
Then when I was a kid, there was tons of them.
There was a whole set of them, like one survived and I have that.
That's awesome.
And that always ends up going on like right at the top of the tree, right at the top of the tree.
Exactly.
No, no, we have a lot of those.
I've always, over the years, I've had it for years and years.
I always put it on.
And then I think Kelly is the only person I've ever let put that on the tree.
(01:02:24):
And so she has- Because you're usually the one touching it.
That was mine.
And so she has done it and then we were trimming the tree the other day.
She's like, this will be the last time either of us do this because now it'll be up to her.
And I thought, yeah, that's kind of cool.
And I'm looking at this thing, I'm like, it's amazing to me how a little piece of plastic can have so much meaning.
(01:02:48):
I mean, you look at our tree and there's like these pictures and these things that they made in kindergarten and first grade.
Like, what's that?
Yeah, it doesn't even look like anything to anyone.
But to us, it's like gold.
That's it.
And I was like, oh my God, that has to be right there in the center where everybody can see it.
Yep.
But that's, I mean, come on, that's what we have in this life, man.
Yep.
(01:03:09):
I mean, you gotta make memories and treasure them.
Memories like that.
That's true.
So, well, that kind of covers everything we had to talk about.
The last thing to talk about is Lullaby Land.
So this will be our third installment.
This is going to be a little bit different because after all, it's Christmas time.
So I wanted to share something a little different.
(01:03:32):
So several years ago, I had an idea for a song and it was, and we've talked about, I think it was in the very first episode.
We talked about fathers who have a little bit of a challenge saying, I love you to their children, right?
We have very common experience with that.
So I was thinking about the idea of a dad who, even though he feels, you know, very deeply for his children, has a hard time saying, I love you.
(01:04:04):
And I had the idea that this dad in the song gets the idea that he's going to pretend he found a note from Santa Claus and he wants to read it to his kids in order to use that as a device to be able to tell his children how he feels.
(01:04:24):
So it's not a lullaby, but it's Christmas.
The song is called Santa Loves You.
And it's going to play right next.
I hope you enjoy it.
More importantly, I hope you have a wonderful Christmas with your family.
Thank you very much for listening to us again.
And we will talk to you on New Year's Eve.
(01:04:44):
Oh my goodness.
Get the champagne out.
(01:05:11):
Want to run along to find your friends and play and see what Santa brought them to.
But maybe you could stay.
I found this note from Santa Claus.
(01:05:32):
He must have left last night.
If you'll stay, I'll read it to you.
Would that be all right?
So climb up on my Soon enough, you'll see.
(01:06:01):
We'll have so little time to share.
Now let's see what Santa had to say.
He's been so mean, you hardly can believe how much you've changed and how you've grown since your last Christmas Eve.
(01:06:33):
He wishes he could see you more and had the time to play.
But making all the toys this year has left more work than day.
So each day when his work is through, when you're asleep at night, he peeks into your little room to see that you're all right.
(01:07:09):
He's so proud to see how bright and kind and strong you are.
So do your best to dream and trust those dreams will take you far.
Most of all, remember these few things.
(01:07:36):
Be brave, be good, and know that if he only could bring you every last thing on your list, and if there's even one thing that he may try again next year, but until then, Santa loves you and he'll be back when Christmas comes again.
(01:08:55):
Well, folks, that's another episode of the Gray Hair and Day Care podcast in the books.
Thanks very much for tuning in and spending this time with us.
We hope it was fun.
If you enjoyed this week's descent into the madness of dadness, be sure to subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss any of our future adventures.
While you're at it, give us a like and share the cast with your friends on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Carrier Pigeon, or wherever you're watching this from.
(01:09:17):
Whatever you crazy kids are using.
Have any hilarious parenting stories of your own?
Questions about navigating fatherhood later in life or even when normal people do it?
Email us at ghdc.podcast at gmail.com.
We'd love to hear from you.
And now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to bed.
This is the gray hair and daycare podcast with a combined age of 111 years and a combined IQ right in that same range.
Your hosts, Frank Cereo and Karlo Russo.
Welcome back.
Here we are.
This is episode nine and most very importantly, it is Christmas Eve.
(00:40):
Or at least this is me released on Christmas Eve.
I can smell the fish.
The feast.
Do you do the feast of the seven fishes?
We do.
I don't know if we do all seven.
I think we substituted some stuff in there.
I don't know if we ever get to seven.
Yeah, I don't think we've ever got.
And I don't know if we ever do the traditional.
So the traditional ones are the cod, the cod with the tomatoes, which I always, if they don't soak it enough.
(01:08):
You got to soak the salt.
Or it's just that it's salty.
It's like eating a shoe.
So the cod, which is.
Cod, so, or the.
Calamari.
Calamari.
My dad always liked to do smelt.
Smelt, fried smelt.
I like, I still like doing that.
And I make, I have a Emeril Lagasse special, very, very fancy tartar sauce with the smelt.
(01:33):
Very good.
It's really good.
I will also do, I do, I have a dish.
It is a bacon wrapped scallop with a brie cream sauce.
Bring it.
I think that's, that's an added on.
It's awesome.
It counts.
I don't know if it's one of the seven, but it counts.
We got shrimp, right?
Shrimp is.
Shrimp cocktail.
That's an easy one.
Throw in there.
(01:53):
I don't know about your family, but did you guys do octopus or octopus salad or.
Now, I believe that's one of the fish.
But that stuff was really, my dad was the only one who liked it.
So there wasn't, and we didn't do like Christmas Eve.
We didn't do the, that stuff.
There was lots of food, but we didn't really do the fish.
So that's something.
We always did.
Yeah.
(02:13):
And I could be wrong.
This could be a segment, you know, back.
I was wrong.
In 10.
I don't think we did it in Italy.
No.
No.
Maybe it is an American.
I could be wrong.
I don't, I don't know.
I wasn't in Italy long enough to, to remember.
Right.
Check with mom.
I'm going to check with mom and dad and check with my sister, my, my sister-in-law's family.
(02:35):
Yeah.
Cause I, I remember asking once and they go, you know what?
We don't do that in Italy.
I don't know.
Maybe I'm wrong, but, but we do it here.
So we still do it.
Yep.
We now have a catered though.
That's nice.
Not catered, but we, we have.
You order it.
We order out.
Yeah.
We order it because it's too much.
It's a lot of work.
Yeah.
And with the frying, it's, it's also the thing that to do all that stuff, you got to do it right then.
(02:58):
Yeah.
So somebody's cooking the whole time.
Somebody's cooking.
So right after I leave the studio, I'm going to be going and picking up the fish.
There you go.
Go pick up the fish.
I'll pick up the fish.
Look, you know what Kelly will make a very nice.
She has a recipe for sea bass, which we do sometimes with, we're talking, this is really about, this isn't about a child and it's just about food.
(03:20):
It's Christmas Eve.
She does a recipe for sea bass with an olive tapenade.
Wow.
It is delicious.
Fantastic.
Okay.
Well, I got to try that.
And her fruit cake thing.
Either way.
So yes.
That, so, so it is, hopefully everybody's having a very merry Christmas Eve and enjoying their holidays, but yeah, here we are.
(03:44):
So as always.
I am Frank Cereo.
I'm 55 years old and my wife is 26 weeks pregnant and yeah, it's just going flying right by.
It's going buddy.
So the, the update for some reasons, I've looked at multiple websites to, for the weekly kind of the weekly size produce size produce.
(04:05):
Again, this week again is a cauliflower, which we talked about last time.
So size of a head of cauliflower.
Now she sleeps and wakes on a schedule.
So she has a sleeping and waking schedule in her little apartment there and my lovely wife, her, while her lungs are not fully developed still.
(04:27):
Okay.
But at this point she could breathe with help.
So just from one week to the next, the development is happening so quickly.
Seven days.
Look what happens.
That's it.
Seven days.
So week 26 had a cauliflower sleeping and waking on a schedule and lungs are developing and to the point where she could get by with a little help.
(04:49):
So that is all.
She's cooking up just fine.
I think so.
Yeah.
It's it's, it's funny.
I was, because preparing for the holidays and we're buying seems like all of a sudden there's more cookies around and stuff like that.
And I happen to, for those many people in my family know, but for those of you who don't know, when I was a kid, my dad was a distributor or Stella Doro cook.
(05:15):
I just saw them in the kitchen walking in.
And they're up there.
That's cookie.
Absolutely.
I was teasing Kelly saying you you're shaped like an S cookie now.
She's got the cute little belly.
But yeah, everything, everything seems to be moving along.
I'm telling you, I know, I know you're probably growing up with it, probably sick of just looking at him.
But the minute I walked in, I looked at that.
(05:37):
I'm like, I want to walk.
I haven't had him in such a long.
Honestly, the ones I liked the most were the Swiss fudge.
Oh yeah.
They were so good.
But that was, that was the thing was when he was, when he did that, we didn't get, we would get the, the stales.
So when he would, when something would expire before it's sold at like Williams or you'd come on the big lot or a broken package or something.
(06:00):
Yeah.
We got big lots now.
And it was never the Swiss fudge.
It was like the margaritas.
You know, what's funny is my brother to this day talking about food again.
He is, we are talking about, but he, he helped my father deliver the cookies when he was a kid and I was too little before I stopped doing that.
(06:21):
But my brother to this day can tell you which cookie and how many were on the shelf of the truck.
Wow.
He remembers it.
He will recite it occasionally when we get together right here was like, he can, he was still remembers it now 50 or 60 or 60 years later.
(06:43):
So it's out, it's on the counter.
Yeah.
I saw it.
Yeah.
There's cookies everywhere.
There's, there's some cookies out, but the S cookie may, I was teasing Kelly.
You're like, that's cookie.
Yeah.
So she's a, so she's got the shave.
She gets a little cute little belly, but the, but to now stop talking about food and start talking about the podcast and what we should be talking about our first segment, which I knew was going to be in everyone.
(07:07):
And here it is.
Once again, I was wrong.
So I was wrong this week from last episode, we discussed my deep fear of being involved in the birth of my child and how I thought, well, if it was a cesarean, we weren't sure what the protocol was.
(07:30):
Apparently I get to scrub in.
If I think I might've said you might just scrub in.
I get to, I'm astonished.
That they would want a lay person in there at all.
Like, can't you just like, they have to put her out.
Like, isn't she under assume again?
(07:50):
We don't know.
I don't know what happened.
My wife had ours naturally.
So I have no idea.
I don't know if it's a, I don't think it's a local, she's just talking to you.
The only thing I know for sure is the only thing I know for sure is in that case, there is in fact a curtain that I will be behind.
I believe that's so very true, but there, there you go.
(08:14):
So what are you hoping for?
No, you never want surgery.
No, it's always search surgery.
Whatever's best for the baby and easiest is what I want.
But yeah, that was immediately like, Oh yeah, no, you're you'll be there.
I'm like, fantastic.
Yeah.
There's no, there's no 1950 father anymore, but you were talking about having a cigar and having a martini here at the waiting room, right?
(08:36):
Unless you're just, you just want to start off the whole, the whole, uh, parenthood real bad.
It's like disappointing.
I'm leaving the room.
Disappointing everyone.
Yeah.
Just disappoint everyone.
Yeah.
Let me know when you're done.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
No, you'll be fine.
I'm sure.
But you were wrong.
I was wrong.
I was wrong.
It's good that you can see that.
I think there might be based on what happened last episode.
(08:58):
Yep.
We might have a new one that's called Kelly is never wrong because of the way she handled the controversy that has already been resolved of whether or not Carlo truly guessed the Lululemon backpack without going to four questions.
If I ever get in any legal trouble, I'm calling her.
(09:19):
That's it.
You should.
I'm not calling a lawyer.
I'm calling Kelly.
It was, it was fantastic the way she, I couldn't believe it.
I'm like, just write him a little note.
I don't recall Senator.
I will never write him a note.
She will never admit it.
No, it's fine.
We were both right.
Kelly.
That's that's true.
(09:39):
I know she's listening to this on the chair.
We're watching on her right now.
Watching it right now.
So there was, I was wrong.
So you're doctoring it up.
You're, you're doing all the, you're cleaning the hands.
You're putting on the, you're putting on the, uh, the scrubs.
You're, you're doing it all.
I don't know.
I didn't even like to wear a mask during COVID.
I don't want to do that, but we'll see.
(10:00):
That's no, it's, it's, it's gotta be.
Honestly, it's probably a lot easier to do that.
Cause you know, you're just, there's that, like you said, the blanket that's covering half the body.
Yup.
You're just talking to her up there or maybe not.
I don't know if she's awake or not.
I don't know what you're doing.
You could be just, just apologize.
(10:21):
Then, then the natural is natural.
You're going to be, you're going to be everybody's up and running.
Yeah.
So we'll see.
We'll see.
But that's, I was wrong.
We'll have the video going for the podcast in the room.
You know what I thought?
I thought about, I, and I talked to Kelly about this.
What I might do for that is, and you tell me what you think of this.
(10:41):
Sure.
I will.
What I told her was I'll have her find the most horrific video she could possibly find.
She'll do the research, find the video.
Okay.
And then have you ever seen like these videos of like Ben reacts to whatever?
Sure.
So we'll set up the two of us.
(11:02):
We'll sit in the home theater with a camera on us and the video will play.
So we won't, we won't show you the video.
Yeah.
But she, and that's the first thing Kelly said.
It was like, well, as long as we don't, we're not going to infringe on copyright.
She is a lawyer.
Why does this is what you think about?
But you're not thinking about your husband crying on camera.
(11:24):
Like, oh my God.
But so we could do that.
We could do a Frank feints live.
So the video is going to be of a, we'll have her find a video of a birth of a late.
And then we will play it in the home theater, but the camera, Oh, let's do that tonight.
I got the popcorn.
I want to see what happens to you.
We want to see if you run it.
(11:46):
We'll run it.
I will.
At the very least I'll be seated.
But yeah, I thought we could do it.
It'll be, that would be fun.
I'm in.
If I'd have to find the way I want to tie it into my Fitbit.
So you can watch my heart rate spike.
The wife's coming over for, for a podcast.
Maybe we can watch movie night.
(12:07):
We usually have movie night.
This will be a different movie night.
Different kind of movie night.
Well, I'm in, if you guys can figure that out, I'm in.
Okay.
So that we might do that in the future.
Oh, Kelly, she's getting into it now.
This is great.
I love it.
Yeah.
She's involved.
That's the executive producer level.
I got to give her the credit.
She's going to be our producer.
I'm going to have to have titles at the bot.
Yep.
Our lawyer.
(12:29):
Entertainment lawyer.
Entertainment lawyer.
All right, I'm in.
Copyright lawyer.
So the next segment that we're going to roll into now, again, a perennial favorite, the Silver Fox mailbox.
I love this part.
So the Silver Fox mailbox, really what we have to go over this time is, we're, it is, you know, this, this episode comes out on Christmas Eve.
(12:49):
Tomorrow, we will be putting out the results of the voting.
There's going to be an announcement tomorrow.
Yep, an announcement of our Name the Baby initiative.
So again, as a refresher, you could still vote until we're going to say midnight on Christmas Eve.
(13:12):
Okay.
That's the deadline.
I'm going to close the Google form.
So it's out there.
It's on the Google form.
We have, the possibilities are Carmella Rose, Gabriella Marie, Lucia, Sophia, Michaeline, Froot Loop, Jasmine Bubbles, Mariela, Madeline, Francesca Kelly, Josephine, Charlotte, Nicole, and Kiara.
(13:39):
And I will say, so far, the leader in the voting, and it's close, but the leader is, Josephine.
Wow.
Currently.
Okay.
Madeline is a close second.
Okay.
There's time, people.
But there's time.
You can get, if you get those votes in there, just get them in, and I will make us, we're going to have a special announcement tomorrow, but that's, that's where we are.
(14:04):
So far, it could be baby Josie.
I have no problem with that at all.
Although you desperately want it to be Madeline.
Well, yeah, for, for the sake of my home and health.
Happiness.
Happiness.
Your marriage.
But no, Josephine is also a family name for me.
So I'll be happy with a fake baby Josie.
Fake baby Josie.
(14:26):
That could be it.
It'll be better than Jasmine Bubbles.
Jasmine Bubbles or Carlina Louise.
Oh, that's right.
Carlina Louise.
Yeah, that was another one from our dear friend Dave.
From Dave.
Yeah.
That's right.
So that's our Silver Fox mailbox update.
And now we're going to move into, if this is the first time, a lot of work has gone into this one.
(14:50):
This is our first installment of the database.
Welcome to the inaugural episode of the database, where I'm going to try to learn from friends, dads that I don't know, people with different perspectives on parenting and different experiences.
(15:11):
And I am joined today by somebody whose work I've respected for many, many years, Mr. Paul Giamatti, ladies and gentlemen.
Pleasure to be here.
I've got a break between movies.
And I thought, what better place?
Working at that, what's that studio in Liverpool called?
Doing their latest film.
I'm the grumpy principal.
(15:35):
He could play that.
So in fact, this is not a Paul Giamatti, but he bears a striking resemblance to him.
This is John Taylor, a gentleman that I've known for now.
Over 25 years.
97 to 2002 was when I worked for Circuit.
(15:58):
So we met somewhere right around.
I mean, 98, 99.
Yeah, 98 or 99.
The better part of 25 years that we've known each other.
And we ended up initially playing in a band together briefly.
I joined an existing concern.
(16:19):
You did, but you traveled immense distances to make it happen.
It's true.
A testament to your dedication.
I enjoyed it very much.
So we've known each other for a very long time, most recently and also for quite a while now, 10 years.
We have worked together in the location-based entertainment business.
(16:40):
But I guess to start off, I think I'd like to hear just from your perspective.
What is the uniqueness of your dad, your fatherhood situation right now?
And a little bit about you generally.
Yeah, sure.
Thank you.
So obviously, the fact that I'm here hopefully implies that I am a dad.
(17:06):
I'm the youngest of four, and none of my siblings ended up having kids.
And I kind of, as life moved on, I kind of thought I wasn't going to have kids.
Even prepared my mom that, hey, sorry, mom is on the cards.
You're not going to be in the grandma business.
You are not going to be a grandmother.
And as luck would have it, you know, life found a way to go my way.
(17:31):
And I did end up meeting someone and getting married.
And we had a kid right before I turned 40.
So I snuck a kid in right at 39.
So still a little bit older, dad.
Yeah, yeah, no, I was definitely nervous about that for sure at that time.
And now I do have an eight-year-old.
(17:54):
I am currently I am divorced.
So I'm a single dad who does get along very amicably.
Good, good co-parenting situation.
Yeah, it's every day is it's cliche, but every day is an adventure.
Having a child leading right up to an eight-year-old where I'm at now.
So I mean, it's interesting because it's as common now kind of 50-50, right?
(18:18):
To be in a single dad, single mom situation.
Yeah.
As you know, as a married couple or a committed couple with kids.
But I do think that's obviously a different perspective.
And you kind of have you have both, right?
So you have kind of when you were together in the early days with Jacob.
Yeah.
And then now kind of the day-to-day and managing co-parenting that I think is going to make your perspective unique.
(18:45):
Yeah.
And one of the things that I do think when I think about our history together and you with Jacob, the memory that comes back to me first is a couple of weeks before.
Well, it was just we worked together, John and I.
John's working in the same location, one of the locations that I manage.
(19:06):
I was there officing, you know, in that spot.
So we saw each other a lot.
And John had just completed like a coaching conversation with an employee and I was that I kind of I didn't feel great about.
And we were having one of those developmental conversations that we sometimes have.
And I said, and I was just like, look, just do me a favor.
(19:27):
Just never have a kid, never have a kid.
Because if you do, you will destroy that child.
Like, just don't do it.
You can't communicate to this way.
And like two weeks later to not even I think it was really close.
And John comes in, he's like, I'm going to I'm going to be a father.
I'm like, immediately I thought back to that.
I'm like, oh, my God.
(19:48):
And I have to say very I'm very pleased to have been completely wrong.
Jacob's a great kid, you know, and he seems like he's healthy and and doing really well and thriving.
And it's great.
The few opportunities I've had to interact with him.
He's a good kid.
So but I do I think when I'm like, why did I have this?
(20:09):
It is funny.
It's funny how it happens.
It was so purely from a position of self-interest for me.
Yeah.
What do you think?
What was the biggest challenge you faced in the like the early months of the first few months of of fatherhood?
Yeah, sure.
(20:29):
Well, one very interesting fact is prior to my own child, I had never held a baby before.
That that's something.
So I was it was all new to me.
And no exposure whatsoever.
None.
Wow.
So I had as little experience as you could possibly have.
(20:52):
Right.
Starting with a clean slate.
That's good.
And I would say it's the scary part is how, you know, the way the hospital goes.
There is essentially there's two things that you have to have covered in order to go home with the baby.
So you're in the hospital.
You've got the baby and you you need two things.
(21:15):
You need to watch a 1970s video on not to shake your baby.
And you need to have a car seat.
And those are the only.
That's the bar.
Literally the only prerequisites for them to allow you to go home.
Okay.
And and you get home that night and it's you just it's impossible not to feel like, how could they let this happen?
(21:40):
How could they send us?
Why did they trust us with this?
It's it's impossible not to feel that way.
And those early nights, you know, we you know, we had the we had the bassinet.
You know, you get all the things that you think you need.
You had all the stuff.
Yeah.
And and we put the baby in the bassinet and the baby did not want to be in the bassinet.
(22:02):
And the bassinet was supposed to be this thing that we needed.
And it it just turned out to not be a thing that we needed.
And so those early days, I think it was just a learning all the things that you prepare for.
Some of them are going to be great.
You know, he ended up sleeping in this very.
(22:23):
It almost like was shaped like kind of skinny, like a green bean.
And it was on two two kind of rocking legs.
But it kind of ensconced him at the sides.
And that ended up being like.
That was the thing.
It was far cheaper than the bassinet.
But that was what he liked to sleep in.
Right.
(22:43):
So, yeah.
So did did your wife have experience with little kids?
No, no.
What was very interesting is while obviously a lovely person, never really had much interaction with kids.
And one of the one of the early things I noticed, we were we were cashing out in a grocery in the grocery store and we're in the line.
(23:07):
And I mean, it's stuck out to me like like a lightning bolt.
The way she was interacting with, you know, there's somebody in front of you in line with a cart.
It's a mom with a young child.
And the way she just.
Became a completely different person.
(23:27):
And the way she was interacting with these little kids, it was also engaging with children prior to that.
I mean, they if they were there, it was just gray static, just completely unaware of these things.
And I was the same way.
I have a buddy who's got older teens.
And, you know, I've I've known him for over 20 years as well.
(23:50):
And I was friends when, you know, when he had kids and the kids were there, but they were just, again, static background.
They just didn't notice them.
Yeah.
And then everything does it just it just changes.
That's got to be interesting.
So those initial challenges were literally like you starting from ground up with.
(24:11):
Yeah.
I mean, I had to be doing all I had changed diapers, hadn't done, you know, bottles, hadn't.
Was there a clear?
Who was better at it?
Because you were both kind of equally inexperienced.
Yeah.
Was was your wife so of a natural at it than you?
I mean, she is amazing at at all of it.
(24:35):
OK.
And I will say, I mean, I I'm so fortunate at how good she is at things.
I was very good at getting him to sleep.
Really?
Yeah.
You were the one who could get him to fall asleep.
I am.
So I can.
It's the dulcet tones of your voice.
It could be.
(24:55):
I I I remember the early days.
I would kind of go robotic in the sense of like, OK, I'm going to pick you up and I am going to walk in a track throughout the home.
Which is not as big as a track outside.
And I'm just going to walk on this track, kind of rocking you and walking through this until you fall asleep.
(25:22):
And whether it takes five minutes, 15 minutes, a half hour.
This is all I am just the world got very small and all you you're kind of forced to see what's right in front of you.
I think what's interesting is the things you will be able to accomplish that you in a million years didn't think like you're like, oh, my gosh, I'm not going to be able to change diapers or I'm not going to be able to do this.
(25:43):
And you just somehow do.
You just figure it out.
But yeah, she I mean, she was amazing is continues to be amazing at everything.
But yeah, I think bedtime and going to sleep.
That was your thing.
That was your superpower.
Yeah.
Getting them to sleep.
So was there anything that.
(26:04):
In those first few months that you thought I I wish I had done whatever that thing is before before he was born, like what was the was there that if only I had done X.
Oh, that's a good question.
I had a lot of books that I don't think I read.
(26:25):
I've already experienced.
I definitely I look I I read through some of the stuff.
It isn't to say I didn't read anything, but there are so so many books out there.
There is literally I'm constantly talking about it.
I have this list of books stack now.
And Kelly is a voracious reader.
So she's tearing through the stuff and they just go into my pile.
(26:48):
I've been almost exclusively like there were four dog like books on how to introduce the dogs to the baby for just on that.
And finally, after like three, I didn't I just gave up.
I'm like, I'm not reading the fourth one.
But yeah, there's there's a tremendous amount of reading.
And yeah, so I can picture that.
(27:09):
So you were like looking for the yeah, the bold passages.
And I mean, the high is everything is with hindsight.
There was and to be unhelpful, I'm not going to remember the app, but there was an app that I remember we had that I don't I don't think it was called the Wonder Years, but it basically it mapped out their brain.
(27:35):
Kind of by day and week and month, and it was almost a pregnancy, the development.
No, no, this is when they're very little.
And it it essentially it lined up when your kid was going to be really or basically it was like a weather app.
(27:58):
And it would it would it graphically use like storm clouds and and all these things.
And I wish I was making this up.
It lined up because you look at at your partner and you're like, this is this is insane.
What is happening right now?
Why?
Why is everything so crazy?
And then you would look and you're like, oh, we're in one of the we're in one of the storm cloud patches.
(28:21):
So it's like over like it would be like a week that, oh, this is a danger week.
Yeah.
And it was accurate.
I got to find out what I was.
I will.
Afterwards, we'll do some research because I promise you that sounds invaluable.
It was it was helpful because I guess, yeah, you can't really prepare, read, read about this.
But, you know, being prepared for all the things that you're going to unexpectedly go through.
(28:47):
Gotcha.
That's interesting.
So, yeah, but yeah, yeah.
That would be the forecast app.
I'll find out what the name is.
And do the reading, basically.
Oh, yeah.
OK.
Everyone has, you know, you you think you feel because you're in it.
You feel like, oh, my gosh, nobody's ever gone through this until you realize that basically most everyone has gone through this.
(29:12):
Yeah, there's the one book that I'm finally in now is the one that everybody's supposed to read.
What to expect when you're expecting.
I think that was the one.
And already because I started because I started it so much later because of all the dog books, I'm now reading about what has already happened in the pregnancy.
And I'm like, I wish I knew.
Yeah, it would have made things easier.
(29:32):
So I guess I definitely get that.
So no experience baby wrangling before Jacob arrived on the scene.
Yeah.
So what is the what is there a hack?
Is there a trick?
Is there something that you did learn once Jacob arrived?
That is like the thing that so, you know, I would say.
(29:53):
So the funny thing is, is one of the early nights where you're alone, you've got the baby and you're just like, I don't I don't know what to do here.
I remember I was I had him in his little swaddle and I'm we were taking kind of turns to get sleep.
And it's like the middle of the night and I'm walking and he just won't sleep.
And I, you know, I put him on top of the stove and I just remember looking at him like, why is this happening?
(30:22):
You know, before picking him up and walking.
But I took that.
The stove wasn't on.
The stove was not on.
There's nothing controversial about this.
But I do I do distinctly remember.
That's an image.
And putting him, you know, on top of this stove and just under that that sort of dome light that they have.
And just looking at this baby like, what is it like?
(30:42):
What is happening?
Trying, trying to trying to get this.
But the thing we learned and that we were very fortunate and every child is going to be completely different.
But we got we were very if we were good at anything due to our inexperience, the one thing we were good at was consistency.
We were, I mean, probably to a fault.
(31:05):
We were so consistent about we tracked all of the feedings, all of the diaper changes, naps, same times every day, bedtime, same time every day.
And just we just stayed very, very pattern based, consistent.
So at that point, is it pretty much just your choice?
(31:27):
It's not like you have to convince the kid to go to bed at that point.
It's just that's.
So in at the very beginning, you have to teach the baby what daytime and nighttime is.
OK.
They don't know what that is.
And to give a little backstory, my son was born.
It was it was a very scary incident.
(31:48):
So he's born.
And the moment he's born, like five plus people rush into the room and take him away.
Really?
Yeah.
Inexplicably, you don't know what's going on.
It's already the scariest thing I've ever seen.
Sure.
And then they rush in, take him away.
I'm looking at my wife.
(32:09):
She's looking at me.
We're both like, what?
We don't know what's happening.
And nobody's telling like nobody tells.
In the moment that I don't remember, I don't have a memory of it.
Right.
OK.
It wasn't it wasn't long.
We're told that the baby probably felt like it was terrifying.
It was terrifying.
Baby swallowed meconium.
(32:30):
Oh, meconium.
That is a word that Carlo keeps mistaking for what killed Superman.
So that so this happened during during childbirth.
Yeah.
Or yeah, or like during the birth or right before the birth.
I'm not sure how how close it was, but I think it was during the birth.
And so they rush in because they have to clear that out.
(32:52):
It's right.
And yeah, that can be very bad.
Yes.
So he ends up spending five days in the NICU.
Oh, wow.
All due to that.
Yes.
Wow.
And like, you know, you're talking like the little incubator with the tape and all the stuff.
And you can't really interact.
No.
And I've you know, I've long maintained if I was ever to become a millionaire, I would give every penny to the NICU nurses at Crouse Hospital.
(33:21):
Because when I tell you that place is unlike any that specifically the NICU ward and the people who work there.
I mean, I've never been in such a an almost heavenly place that the quiet, the tranquility, the peace, the kindness, because everyone there is not there for a good reason.
(33:45):
And the nurses there are just.
I mean, nurses are nothing short of miracle workers.
That's fantastic.
So we are back from our first installment of the database.
So that is our time spent with John Taylor.
First part of that interview.
And what did you think?
First of all, love John.
(34:07):
John Taylor, not of Duran Duran.
Is that one of the?
John Taylor's of Duran Duran.
Oh, okay.
So when people thought, they're going to have John Taylor on it.
Yeah.
You got Duran Duran talking about fatherhood.
Yeah.
They're like, that's not John Taylor.
John Taylor.
Yeah.
I thought that was, I thought that was a funny part.
There's some, some real stuff in there that I remember happening.
(34:30):
Because I, again, I was working with you guys.
Yeah.
We were all, we were kind of all together at that point.
And yeah.
And I did when he, as soon as he said meconium, I'm like, oh my God.
I love talking about that for three episodes.
Yeah.
We looked at each other and we just started laughing.
And then I remembered, yeah.
I remember the doctor saying that to us, uh, with our first.
(34:52):
And I just, you just forget, you know, you forget it.
Nothing happened luckily to our child.
So it was like in and out.
This could happen.
It didn't happen.
So we never thought about it again until our second one didn't happen either.
So, but it was funny when I was watching him going, oh my God, that's right.
I remember that they said, if this happens, they're going to have to take the baby away and all that good stuff.
(35:12):
And, and I'm glad it obviously didn't work.
Like when he said that immediately, like immediately I kind of chuckled because of hearing meconium.
But then when he talks about it, like it had to be absolutely terrifying.
You go from this intense experience to the kids gone.
Like they just, they swoop in and take the kid and then five days in the NICU.
(35:33):
And yeah, that had to be absolute.
Like, like I have these nothing's happening and I'm getting terrified.
So in a situation like that, like, yeah, that had to be absolutely.
That happened to us.
Yeah.
So remember when I told you the, our first was almost three weeks early.
Yes.
So when, when they had, when my wife had the baby, someone said to the doctor, oh, it's it's three something.
(36:01):
It's it's preemie or something.
Cause it was a small, it was very small.
And the doctor was like, oh my God, grabbed them.
And they were talking amongst each other.
So we don't know what's going on.
We just see the doctor taking the baby, bringing them to like the other side of the room.
Right.
The baby's not crying yet.
Right.
Right.
Oh no.
(36:21):
Yeah.
The baby's not.
So I'm, I'm like, oh my God, something's wrong.
Then I hear the crying.
So, okay.
I got that.
So right.
Like you said, it's 15 seconds.
It lasts in your mind three days.
It's, it's, it's, it's eternity.
Right.
So obviously you hear the crying.
So it's not that, then like you're freaking out.
Then I hear, then I hear somebody going, oh, it's, it's two and a half weeks.
(36:43):
Early.
The doctor goes, oh, okay.
And that told him, okay.
His lungs are probably.
Yeah.
That's a big difference.
Right.
It's a huge difference.
So it went from real, you know, like, oh my God, let's figure this out.
Five to about, oh, okay.
So it's just a small baby.
Right.
Just a, you know, two, two and a half weeks.
Right.
So yes, very scary.
(37:03):
So I couldn't even imagine.
Yeah.
With John just five days away.
No one's explaining it.
Yeah.
Yup.
Yup.
Yeah.
No, it was great.
So I enjoyed it.
Hopefully you guys did too.
We'll, we'll, we'll have more of that interview coming in the future.
Um, but for now we get to move on.
This is only the second time we will have done this segment.
(37:25):
We're going to move on to the diaper diet.
So if you recall, let's get real.
Last time we talked about this, I was there.
So the whole idea again is I'm trying to lose weight as Kelly is gaining weight with the baby and trying to stay ahead of it.
(37:46):
So last time I was behind in the race by 1.2 pound.
So I had, she had gained like 12.4 at that point and I had lost 11.2. So I was down by 1.2. So it's been three or four weeks.
Okay.
And, but there was, I want to qualify.
(38:07):
I want to qualify that there was a Thanksgiving in there.
Now the good part was it was a Thanksgiving at my brother's house.
So there wasn't that much of a challenge.
Okay.
But because when it's at home, it's just horrible.
But anyway, so I avoided a lot of leftover, that kind of stuff.
So what do you think?
Where, where do you think?
(38:27):
I was optimistic that I was going to be able to start catching up maybe.
But as we've talked about, you talked about her appetite has increased.
So, and the last time we talked about, she gained 12.1. She had gained, I was behind by 1.2. She had gained at that point 12.4 pounds and I had lost 11.2. Now this is, this is women.
(38:51):
It's different than us.
Right.
I mean, we, we, we go on a diet, we lose like 30 pounds in a week.
And they're like, I lost two pounds in six months.
It's a lot harder for them, but she's putting it, you know, she's going the other direction.
Gaining could be a lot easier.
Again, I have not seen her.
So do not, do not take this like offensive.
Like this is tough.
Cause yeah, you haven't seen her.
Not seen her.
I'm going to say from what you're telling me, the, the, the eating and stuff, I'm going to say she probably gained three pounds.
(39:17):
Oh no.
Oh really?
Yeah.
So more the game.
Yeah.
So now the, you might be in trouble.
I'm now behind by nine pounds.
Oh, and I still lost another three.
So she went, she is now up 23.2 pounds.
(39:41):
Okay.
And I am nine pounds behind.
So I've lost a little over 14.
So both of you, it's good.
I'm good for her.
Yeah.
Like she, I think she's like, she's doing very well.
She's doing very well.
It's not like she doesn't, she isn't blowing up.
She's got a nice little baby bump.
It's been good.
Now, this last, the last week, and we'll talk about some of the challenges when we get into the next, her, her, her eating has changed a little bit, but yeah, so that, that's where we are right now.
(40:12):
She's plus 20.
23.2. 23.
And I said three pounds.
So I was off by a lot.
Yeah.
Well, over the course of a month in this stage of the pregnancy, this is when you start to put on the weight.
That's awesome.
So, yeah, so she's doing well, but, but I got a tough road to home.
I, yeah, I do have to say, I did see her last week.
Right.
(40:32):
After the show.
Yeah.
Yeah, you did.
And she looked good.
So I guess I didn't.
Yeah.
So it's all being Kelly.
It's all baby.
Yeah.
So congratulate to you too.
I mean, I'm telling you, and we talked about this before.
I did not do any losing weight when my wife was pregnant.
Both times.
There was no losing weight.
It has been a little, little by little.
(40:54):
Hopefully I can, I don't know if I'm able to catch up, but we'll see.
Yeah.
But I'm down, I'm down nine.
So you have any weight loss tips for aging fathers?
Let me know.
Yeah.
But we'll see.
So that is the diaper diet.
And now we will move on to what just happened.
(41:15):
So in the last week, lots of little things that again, pregnancy wise, not a lot going on right now.
No, kind of slow.
Yeah.
Now, next week, we're going to have some more doctor's appointment stuff.
That'll be fine.
Sure.
Something like that.
So what one interesting thing that has happened in the last week there, there's always, as you know, every time you come here, there's a stack of packages from Amazon.
(41:45):
I just took a photo.
I laughed.
I took a photo.
There's a lot.
I might just, I'll share that.
I'll send it to you.
Part of this is a function of, of just the baby and stuff.
The other part is we do a lot of our Christmas shopping online.
Sure.
And things are just showing up.
(42:06):
So I can't, if it says Kelly on the package, I know could be mine.
Gotcha.
Could be someone else's.
You don't want to open it.
But I can't take any chances.
So I just leave a stack and I'm like, okay.
And then they go into the guest room.
Sure.
So the guest room is literally, you'll have to look, it's full, but big box shows up.
Okay.
(42:26):
And I'm like, what the heck is this?
And, and I ask, and Kelly says, oh, that might be the chair.
I'm like chair.
So I open it up and Kelly's sister is clearly going to be a very enthusiastic.
Oh yeah.
Aunt.
(42:48):
And she's like, you gotta look at it.
This is a Snoopy chair.
It's, it is custom.
Of course.
Has the baby's name on the chair.
It's like white and red, like Snoopy's dog house.
Sure.
And it's like a child size, but like for a three-year-old to sit in like a, like a bark lounger, like it's, it's, it's adorable.
(43:09):
You gotta store this for the next three years.
You know, I'm like, where do we put it?
Thanks.
And Kelly, I mean, this is like, I told her she's cut off.
Like she can't, she has to stop, but it's, it's adorable.
At least have gifts that are age appropriate.
Already, still not even born yet and already has custom furniture.
Yeah.
You're wow.
(43:30):
Well, you'll probably find a little place in the room, right?
Sure.
Yeah.
Or three years later.
In her dorm.
Like, I don't know.
It's cute.
It's going to be adorable.
So there's, there is that.
That's funny.
Yeah.
You're going to, you're going to see, but they've already, well, they have, uh, she has brothers that have children or at least one brother who has, who has two.
(43:54):
So this is the first time the sister is probably very close.
And this is the first, she doesn't have a, she doesn't have a kids herself.
So this is different, right?
The sister, the sister.
Yes.
That's the thing.
Yeah.
So you got to watch out for her.
Cause she's going to have gifts all over your house.
I'm sure it'll be, it'll be good.
Yeah.
But that's super cute.
Yeah.
Super cute.
So we had that.
The thing I thought when I always, I will talk with Kelly before we record these.
(44:19):
So what's, what, what do we talk about from this week?
Like, what do you think are the notable?
And she's like, well, she's been moving and grooving, moving and grooving.
So we've been moving and grooving.
There's a lot of activity in there and on a kind of a regular schedule.
So that, that has been good.
I was going to, no, I was going to say this.
(44:40):
Kelly had noticed certain things that are like on TV or music that the baby moves more or, you know, is there something that's triggering it more than other things?
I don't know if she has, has noticed anything like that.
Not yet.
Okay.
But she's noticing that there's kind of typical behavior at certain times of day.
(45:00):
Yep.
She does Pilates for a little while.
But so there's that, that stuff.
The, the, the bad thing is this week unrelated to the, well, I guess tangentially related to the, the pregnancy, but she's had a really bad cold this week and she can't take anything.
Right.
So she can't take, she's had a sore throat.
(45:21):
She's got a cough.
She can't take, can't take any cough medicine.
She can't do any of that.
So she's been having a hard time and it's, I will, this is one, this is a very strange thing.
And I almost, I feel bad even bringing it up, but I'm going to, because it's funny or at least it's a little funny.
Because we have a podcast and we talk about everything.
(45:42):
The first time this ever happened, we were, we were in London.
We had gone on a trip to London.
Okay.
It was in the, it was around this time of year.
And so we're going to all these London, there's all these Christmas markets and beautiful, it's a great city.
And so we're out in the cold and, and, and spending time and she came down with a little bit of a cold.
(46:04):
So we're staying, we're staying in this place and Knight's Bridge.
It's a really nice part of London.
And we're there and she's, we just, she needed some cold medicine.
So we go to, there's a drug store on the corner.
We go down there and the, you don't think about this, but you're in another country.
Right.
There's no like NyQuil.
(46:25):
Sure.
It's all these weird brands.
Right.
There's stuff, right.
So there's this thing called night nurse.
Right.
Okay.
And we were asking the girl at the counter and they're like, yeah, that's the closest thing to night, whatever.
Night nurse.
So she takes it, we go to sleep and, and I keep waking up to her making these noises.
(46:47):
These like literally, and it's not like a cold noise, like a snore.
Right.
It's like a, like, like.
Whining, like a.
Like non-verbal complaining.
Oh, like in pain.
Like, like these whiny sounds.
Oh, okay.
But it's like, it's disconcerting.
(47:07):
I'm like, I'm like, are you okay?
And she's like, she has no idea.
She's asleep, but she's making these noises.
And I attributed that to the, to the night nurse.
So we're like, we're never taking that again.
No.
So never hasn't.
Now this was a few years ago.
We were in London like three, four years ago.
Has not happened since, but it was not the night nurse.
(47:31):
Apparently the last couple of nights.
The nurse is back?
Yeah.
It's the weirdest thing.
She will just like, as soon as she falls asleep, make these little squeaky noises.
So when I first got married, Trina would talk in her sleep.
I did not know this.
(47:51):
Okay.
Right.
So I would freak out because there was conversations in bed and I'm thinking, are, are, are we doing talk time now?
Like, do we, I thought we were napping and I'd turn around and she would be asleep.
Like you said, and I'm like, Oh, she's a talker.
Yeah.
She's one of those.
(48:12):
Yeah.
And she did it for a while.
Did they make sense?
No.
Okay.
No, no.
It was clear.
Yeah.
I mean, I knew you could hear what you were saying.
You had no idea what it was completely.
And for some reason, I don't know.
I could be in my head screwing this up, but I don't know if the pregnancy changed it.
She does.
(48:32):
She doesn't do it anymore.
You know why?
Cause she's happy.
Now she's happy.
Before she was like, who am I in bed with?
She was confused.
And another thing about pregnancy, my wife, all her life, we got married up to the point where she got pregnant.
Her hair was, you couldn't even curl it.
(48:54):
It was just straight hair.
I know you probably got straight.
That's it.
Really?
She would curl it.
Like if we were going out to a dance or a wedding or whatever it was, she would curl it within like an hour.
It's straight hair.
Right.
And she gets pregnant and she has curly hair from that moment on 23 years now.
Really?
Plus she's never, her hair never straightened out again.
(49:17):
It turned curly.
That's interesting.
The whole thing changed.
When I first met her to, like I said, to when she got pregnant straight hair, straight hair.
That's interesting.
Yeah.
Things change.
So I don't know.
What do you, what do you think that you think she's, is she trying to talk?
No, like she is.
So like in the beginning when we were first together, she would do the talking thing, but it was like in the morning, like right when you're getting her wake up.
(49:45):
And I discovered because she would say things that made absolute, again, clear as a bell.
Right.
But it may just made no sense.
And that was, it was like when you're in that twilight of waking up.
Cause so that was that.
But this thing was only happened when we were in London.
And now this, this time.
And both times sick.
(50:06):
Yes.
Sick with a cold.
With a cold.
Like a sore throat.
This time there's no medicine at all in her.
No, she can't have anything.
So it's not, it's not.
No night nurse.
Huh?
So yeah.
So it's, it's gotten better.
But to the point where the one, like I had, I crammed in earplugs.
Really?
I, it was way.
And I sleep pretty soundly and I had to put them in her.
(50:28):
It was, it was, I wasn't getting any sleep.
Come says the man who rattles the world when he used to sleep.
So in my defense, uh, what inside was referring to is we had gone, we had gone out.
We had gone to see a, to a formula one race in Montreal.
We shared a room with, with another friend.
(50:52):
And I remember I snore a lot.
I always did snored.
I was not, I thought it was just like, I snore.
So what?
And you told us you go up.
I said, I warned him that would happen.
That was the way when I would have to travel in the type of work that I did with retail, you'd have to go to meetings.
And that was the way I always got a single instead of having to bunk with somebody because I snore.
(51:14):
They like, if you put somebody with me, they're not going to get any sleep.
Cause I snore like a tractor and that would always get me up.
So I, I warned them.
But I remember the next morning we woke up and you said something to the effect of, you don't snore, you die a little.
I sure did.
Because for some reason I, I, I thought I was going to sleep that night and I went to bed and I had to, I got woken up by, by this sound and I, I literally could not close my eyes and I just stared at him going, I'm, he's going to die tonight.
(51:54):
It was, I don't know if he knows that or not.
Not long after that, my doctor suggested that I get a sleep study done.
Yes.
Cause she's like, do you snore?
Yeah.
Do you ever wake up?
Yeah.
So did your friend ever think you were going to die?
Yeah.
So I did this, I do the sleep test and they, they tell you that like, I think the number is maybe 10 or 15 an hour, 10 or an hour.
(52:19):
I was having, I was having like 65, like every minute my airway was closing.
She's like, oh yeah, you need to, you need a CPAP.
So I've been, I have a CPAP that I've been using, but it's nice and quiet.
Oh no, no, no.
Yeah, yeah.
You're good.
That, that is something that never has been inflicted upon.
Upon Kelly.
I've had a CPAP since before we met.
(52:41):
That story comes back in my mind every time I hear like a, you know, somebody snoring or something that immediately goes back to that hotel room and you just, and the other guy, our other friend's sleeping like a baby.
Yeah, it didn't bother him.
Didn't even.
Cause the rest, the rest of the world doesn't know.
No, me, I'm like staring at him going, I'll be here if anything happens to you, my friend.
(53:03):
I will be ready to pounce on your chest.
Yeah.
It was some ribs.
It was bad.
It was, but no, I'm like, that's the thing.
That's the good part now is with a CPAP, you, you know, you have, I don't, you have different kinds.
I have one that's a full mass.
It covers my nose and my mouth.
I have headgear.
It's fantastic.
But I put it on there and it's nice and quiet.
But when the thing that's, the thing is it's pumping air.
(53:25):
It's, it's kind of like inflating your airway so it doesn't collapse.
So because I want to get away from the sound, I've got earplugs in, I put on my CPAP and then I can pull, I can pull the covers up over my head.
Cause it's like a snorkel.
It's like, it's feeding you air.
So I'm literally like giving myself a Dutch oven so I can get away from the sound.
(53:49):
Oh my God.
You got headphones.
You got a mask on your face.
You got Dutch oven.
It's a, we're a wreck.
Oh, we're going to have a child.
How did, oh God, it's so good.
Oh, I'm not laughing.
I'm, I'm just laughing.
Yeah.
You just, you don't even see me.
There's just a big bump.
That's so good.
And a hose for the CPAP.
That's it.
(54:09):
So there's a vacuum in my head.
That's it.
Oh, you just hear the little whoosh, the whoosh of the CPAP.
God, I love Kelly.
That's, she's fantastic.
She just looks, you can go, you need to impregnate me.
I'm just, I'm hoping, I'm hoping that she's going to feel better with the cold stuff.
But very interesting about that.
(54:30):
So there's, there's that.
So yeah.
And yeah, I'm really hoping the talking goes away.
It is very disconcerting.
It is just.
Carlo was not that right.
He was still a little wrong.
Shut up, go to bed.
That's it.
So there's, there was that.
Then the one thing we did in between her not feeling well, we have, we have, and I wanted to ask about kind of Christmas traditions.
(54:55):
One Christmas tradition that we have since we moved here.
We moved into the house that we live in now, where the studio is here.
We've been here for, well, one, two, three, four.
This will be our fifth Christmas.
Yeah, it doesn't seem like that long.
But somewhere or another, I got the idea back in the first year, the first Christmas, that we would go by, because we have kind of a big yard, and we went and bought a little Christmas, like a bald Christmas tree.
(55:29):
From Hafer's, we went to a local, local place, picked out a little Christmas tree.
And I set it up kind of in our backyard, where we can see it from the roof off the deck.
And put, put little Christmas lights on it.
And then in the spring, I plant it.
Oh, okay.
And I've been planting them along the driveway.
Christmas tree.
So now we have four Christmas trees, because every year we do that.
(55:50):
So we went and got our Christmas tree.
Okay.
And we were thinking like, this will be something that we're going to get to do.
Absolutely.
With the baby, every year we'll go, and it'll be a fun thing.
So now it's just the two of us.
We go and we pick out the tree.
But so we'll have that tradition for Christmas, for every Christmas, we'll do that.
That's cute.
I like that.
And then you, it's like a reset.
Then you plant it.
(56:11):
So now it becomes, yeah.
Yeah, so now it's good.
Now it's, we're just in the point, the first one I planted way out toward the road, is now getting to be big enough that I can't put lights.
Like, it took like four net lights to light it.
So I'm going to, but that's why I put Christmas lights on them.
Do you guys use real trees in the house, or do you have a fake?
No, in the house we have two fake ones.
(56:32):
Doesn't say you can chop these down and use them now in your house.
We, you could do, there's a service.
I was telling my brother about this.
The new thing for Christmas trees, instead of, if you want a real tree.
Okay.
What they do is, it's a subscription service.
Of course.
So they bring you a tree.
You pick a tree, a bald tree, root ball.
(56:53):
They bring it.
You decorate it.
It's your tree.
Then after Christmas, you call them up.
They come and get the tree.
They bring it back.
They plant it again.
It grows.
Next year you get the same tree back.
It's a little bigger.
Oh my God.
And you do that year after year after year.
That's your Christmas tree.
And then when it's too big for your house, they bring it and you plant it.
(57:17):
I think that's great.
That's a cute idea.
That's a very cute idea.
I have no idea what that costs and I will never do it.
Probably a lot.
But you're kind of doing it.
Well, I'm doing, but we, we get it and we plant that in the spring, like right away.
But yeah, so there's all kinds of fun.
And it's so funny.
That tradition that you started is going to, as awesome as it is, you look forward to it.
When you put the child now.
(57:38):
Oh, it's going to be so much fun.
Yeah.
It changes that whole thing.
Cause then it's going to be like, that's her first tree.
That's awesome.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
First tree.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's going to be fun.
That will be fun.
So are there, I'm, I'm particularly interested in the, are there things that you did with the boys when they were little, like that we came like, what were the Christmas things that you did with them when they were little?
(58:00):
The one thing Trina always make sure that you keep these traditions going because it's, you know, if it was me, I'd probably give up a little bit.
And I know that about me.
That's why you have a partner that can pick up what you.
I, in this situation, I'm in our relationship.
I'm Trina.
You're Trina.
I'm the one who was like, we, this is something.
(58:22):
So Christmas, you know, the cinnamon rolls, there's the orange, orange cinnamon rolls, orange flavor, orange, orange flames.
Okay.
Okay.
So every year, I don't know why, how it started.
Maybe when she was young, they did it.
I'm not sure.
She'll remind me in the morning.
She'll bake these.
So we wake up to the smell of the cinnamon orangey kind of smell.
(58:44):
So we all know now we get our presents Christmas Eve with our family, but then we keep ours for the kids at the house and we open up our presents.
We have our hot cocoa, our coffee, the pastries that she just made, and we'll open up the gifts and then you'll play around a little bit.
(59:05):
Then we'll all get ready and we go to church.
Awesome.
Yeah.
So that's a neat, that's a neat thing.
That was a neat thing.
And then as we got older, now our traditions now, not now, but in the last probably decade or so is we all go to midnight mass.
So that is our tradition.
That's neat.
(59:25):
So now that's one of the things that Kelly talks about is she's from Buffalo and she was, and she was saying that when, when growing up, they would always go to midnight mass at the Basilica.
There's a beautiful Basilica in Buffalo.
I've never been.
Have you been there?
No, but I mean, we have one in Syria.
(59:46):
So they do, they would have like a full choir and all the, all the music.
And she's like, we should, we should do that.
So you must go to midnight mass at Pompeii.
I have been to midnight mass there not in a long time.
That it's a beautiful, beautiful church.
And they do all the points set.
It's like, it's gorgeous.
(01:00:07):
Absolutely gorgeous.
Yeah.
So that's our tradition.
That's neat.
And it's so funny.
You think these things, I think you might think these things don't matter, but then you stop and the kids go, wait a minute, why are we going to midnight mass?
Wait a minute.
Where's the, you know, the hot cocoa or the orange scented going through the house.
So it does, you gotta keep doing it.
(01:00:29):
It means so much for the kids and yourselves, because you're going to look back and go, oh my God, we used to do this, that, and the other.
And I miss it.
And you know, but it's, but the midnight mass is probably a great way to start your Christmas.
I think that it's going to be fun to come up with new traditions.
The tree is something.
Then you guys are going to come up with new ones.
(01:00:50):
Yeah, that's right.
So far, our traditions is a couple.
We do the one that my favorite is Kelly makes.
She uses the cinnamon brioche bread and makes French toast.
See again, food traditions.
But yeah, traditions are, you got to keep them going.
Yeah.
And you'll have my, my baby's first or the baby's first tree.
(01:01:12):
Oh yeah.
All that stuff.
We have them all.
And every year, every year when we put the tree up, we have the kids put up their stuff and we go through the pictures that they made in first grade.
And we can put on the tree and you see all these years.
Yep.
And it's crazy because, you know, now my son is six foot one and whatever.
And he goes, the tree looks small.
(01:01:32):
I go, no, you're just bigger.
Same tree.
Because you're a giant now.
You're a giant now.
You used to have to get up on a chair to put the star up.
No, it's funny because we just trimmed the tree the other day and I have this little, it was probably like, it was probably some ornament that my mother got at Kmart.
It was, it's just a little felt, little plastic elf, little guy.
(01:01:58):
Then when I was a kid, there was tons of them.
There was a whole set of them, like one survived and I have that.
That's awesome.
And that always ends up going on like right at the top of the tree, right at the top of the tree.
Exactly.
No, no, we have a lot of those.
I've always, over the years, I've had it for years and years.
I always put it on.
And then I think Kelly is the only person I've ever let put that on the tree.
(01:02:24):
And so she has- Because you're usually the one touching it.
That was mine.
And so she has done it and then we were trimming the tree the other day.
She's like, this will be the last time either of us do this because now it'll be up to her.
And I thought, yeah, that's kind of cool.
And I'm looking at this thing, I'm like, it's amazing to me how a little piece of plastic can have so much meaning.
(01:02:48):
I mean, you look at our tree and there's like these pictures and these things that they made in kindergarten and first grade.
Like, what's that?
Yeah, it doesn't even look like anything to anyone.
But to us, it's like gold.
That's it.
And I was like, oh my God, that has to be right there in the center where everybody can see it.
Yep.
But that's, I mean, come on, that's what we have in this life, man.
Yep.
(01:03:09):
I mean, you gotta make memories and treasure them.
Memories like that.
That's true.
So, well, that kind of covers everything we had to talk about.
The last thing to talk about is Lullaby Land.
So this will be our third installment.
This is going to be a little bit different because after all, it's Christmas time.
So I wanted to share something a little different.
(01:03:32):
So several years ago, I had an idea for a song and it was, and we've talked about, I think it was in the very first episode.
We talked about fathers who have a little bit of a challenge saying, I love you to their children, right?
We have very common experience with that.
So I was thinking about the idea of a dad who, even though he feels, you know, very deeply for his children, has a hard time saying, I love you.
(01:04:04):
And I had the idea that this dad in the song gets the idea that he's going to pretend he found a note from Santa Claus and he wants to read it to his kids in order to use that as a device to be able to tell his children how he feels.
(01:04:24):
So it's not a lullaby, but it's Christmas.
The song is called Santa Loves You.
And it's going to play right next.
I hope you enjoy it.
More importantly, I hope you have a wonderful Christmas with your family.
Thank you very much for listening to us again.
And we will talk to you on New Year's Eve.
(01:04:44):
Oh my goodness.
Get the champagne out.
(01:05:11):
Want to run along to find your friends and play and see what Santa brought them to.
But maybe you could stay.
I found this note from Santa Claus.
(01:05:32):
He must have left last night.
If you'll stay, I'll read it to you.
Would that be all right?
So climb up on my Soon enough, you'll see.
(01:06:01):
We'll have so little time to share.
Now let's see what Santa had to say.
He's been so mean, you hardly can believe how much you've changed and how you've grown since your last Christmas Eve.
(01:06:33):
He wishes he could see you more and had the time to play.
But making all the toys this year has left more work than day.
So each day when his work is through, when you're asleep at night, he peeks into your little room to see that you're all right.
(01:07:09):
He's so proud to see how bright and kind and strong you are.
So do your best to dream and trust those dreams will take you far.
Most of all, remember these few things.
(01:07:36):
Be brave, be good, and know that if he only could bring you every last thing on your list, and if there's even one thing that he may try again next year, but until then, Santa loves you and he'll be back when Christmas comes again.
(01:08:55):
Well, folks, that's another episode of the Gray Hair and Day Care podcast in the books.
Thanks very much for tuning in and spending this time with us.
We hope it was fun.
If you enjoyed this week's descent into the madness of dadness, be sure to subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss any of our future adventures.
While you're at it, give us a like and share the cast with your friends on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Carrier Pigeon, or wherever you're watching this from.
(01:09:17):
Whatever you crazy kids are using.
Have any hilarious parenting stories of your own?
Questions about navigating fatherhood later in life or even when normal people do it?
Email us at ghdc.podcast at gmail.com.
We'd love to hear from you.
And now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to bed.
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