January 30, 2025 • 19 mins
On this episode of The Karen Kenney Show, I talk about the simple, yet powerful concept of "starting your day over".
I love the power embedded in the idea that no matter how badly your day may have started, you have the ability to hit that reset button - and begin again at any point.
I share a story (with permission) about a friend in my spiritual mentoring group - The Nest, who by 4pm, had already decided her “whole day” was ruined. 😆
This got me reflecting on how, as children, we would simply call out "Do-over!" when things weren't going our way, and how we can still apply that same mindset as adults.
I explain how this child-like solution is far better than letting our ego hijack us by sending us into a downward spiral of self-sabotage.
I also share some insights I learned back in the day from Al-Anon about not being "sentenced" to a bad day.
The fact is we can consciously choose to shift our perspective at any time, and I offer some practical tools to help us do just that!
KEY POINTS:
• Start Your Day Over Anytime
• Shift Your Perspective With Compassion
• Change Your Physical State, Change Your Emotional State
• Interrupting Negative Patterns
• Trials are Learning Opportunities
• Choose Differently, Choose Again
• The Nest - Group Mentoring Program
BIO:
Karen Kenney is a certified Spiritual Mentor, Writer, Integrative Change Worker, Coach and Hypnotist. She’s known for her dynamic storytelling, her sense of humor, her Boston accent, and her no-BS, down-to-earth approach to Spirituality and transformational work.
KK is a wicked curious human being, a life-long learner, and has been an entrepreneur for over 20 years! She’s also a yoga teacher of 24+ years, a Certified Gateless Writing Instructor, and an author, speaker, retreat leader, and the host of The Karen Kenney Show podcast.
She coaches both the conscious + unconscious mind using practical Neuroscience, Subconscious Reprogramming, Integrative Hypnosis/Change Work, and Spiritual Mentorship. These tools help clients to regulate their nervous systems, remove blocks, rewrite stories, rewire beliefs, and reimagine what’s possible in their lives and business!
Karen encourages people to deepen their connection to Self, Source and Spirit in down-to-earth and actionable ways and wants them to have their own lived experience with spirituality and to not just “take her word for it”.
She helps people to shift their minds from fear to Love - using compassion, storytelling and humor. Her work is effective, efficient, memorable, and fun!
KK’s been a student of A Course in Miracles for close to 30 years, has been vegan for over 20 years, and believes that a little kindness can make a big difference.
KK WEBSITE: www.karenkenney.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Karen Kenney (00:01):
Hey you guys, welcome to the Karen Kenney show. I'm super duper excited to be here talking to you about this topic, which I'm not sure what I'm going to call. I
could call this episode a bunch of differentthings, but I'll probably call it something like starting your day over, just just starting that son of a bitch right over. You
(00:25):
ever have, oh my god, you ever have one ofthose days when before, maybe even before, your feet hit the floor, or not too long after that, you've already kind of like shot
yourself in the foot, whether it's with yourown pissy attitude, or breaking a promise to yourself, or doing something you said you were gonna do, like doing something not
(00:53):
doing something you said you were gonna do,or you find yourself doing something you said you weren't gonna do, and you're Just like, ah, like, just bug it. Like, I already
ruined it. It's already ruined. So I got tothinking about this because we were talking on a call for the nest. My The nest is my spiritual mentoring group, right? It's a
(01:14):
it's an experience, it's a program, it's acommunity. It's like, amazing people. And my friend who's in the group, was telling a story about how the other day at around,
like, four o'clock, she had found herself,like, in a mood. Excuse me, so she was like, kind of in a mood, and she had already just pretty much determined she's, like, it was
(01:38):
only four o'clock, but I knew, like, I wasgonna be in that mood, like I had just decided, like, the day is already shot. The rest of the day is already shot, and I'm
gonna, like, just gonna stay in this stateof mind. And so it got me to thinking about how a children's game, this little children's game that we played when we were
little kids, or this thing that we wouldcall out, could literally just like, like, it's like having a time traveling device. It's like, it's like being able to, like,
(02:07):
have, like, a white eraser board right onyour life, on your day, in your mind. And it's this simple thing where we it's a do over. It's like, can I just get a do over?
Like, I want to do over. And I know, like,if you were a kid. And I think I did an episode about this, something like this. It wasn't in the same exact angle, but it was
(02:28):
like 200 episodes ago, and it was liketalking about, like, can I just get a duo? VA, so when we were kids, one of the fun things about when you were a little kid and
you're playing a game, and if things aren'tgoing the way that you want them to. Like little kids will just randomly scream, do over, do over. But here's the thing, this
(02:51):
child like solution is still wicked good,like we can still put it to work and to use today as adults. So any time that your day is starting to turn to crap, or is already
turned to crap, right, pose like you're justlike, you realize, like, you just want to bang your face off your desk, because it's been one of those days. So I will say this
(03:16):
though, okay, so when you're in one of thosetizzies, when you're in one of those, like, panties in a bunch when you're in like, a mood, or you're just determined, determined
to self sabotage yourself, this child likesolution is way better than being hijacked by our cranky little bastard of an ego and acting childish, because that's one of the
(03:38):
things that happens when things aren't goingour way, or things aren't going the way we want them to we expect them to. Stuff isn't turning out, quote, unquote, right, right,
really, like, really, just how we hadprojected our preferences onto we can start to act like little spoiled brats. We start to have what I call like adult tantrums,
(04:00):
trust me, double Amen, hands if you knowwhat I'm talking about, if you did this. Okay. Okay, so I learned about this concept, of course, as a child, right when we would
just randomly scream out, do over, do over.But this concept also got solidified, and I re learned it, and I might do a whole podcast on this. I've been talking to my, my
(04:22):
one to one client, about this quite a bit,and my the people in the nest as well, about how so much of personal development work, mind shift work, spiritual mentoring, all
the different things you want to whateveryou want to call it, so much of it is about unlearning, learning and then relearning. So something that I learned and continue to
(04:44):
relearn all the time is a concept that Ilearned years ago in Al Anon. So if you don't know what Al Anon is, most people do, but if you don't, so there's aa. AA is, you
know, alcoholics, anonymous. And that's forpeople who find themselves needing help with addiction to substances or whatever. Right to booze, alcohol. Al Anon is for people who
(05:11):
have you know, found themselves inrelationships, whether that's parental, like your family, your sister, your brother, a friend, your sweetie, whoever. So this is
for the people who like, quote, unquote, asthey would say, Love the alcoholics, right? So I used to go to Al Anon. I've often jokingly said I have been lucky enough to
(05:32):
know and love quite a few alcoholics in mylifetime. So in Al Anon, though, there's this concept that is like you are not sentenced, like you are not inflicted by
right? You are not sentenced to having a badday, meaning we are not stuck with the day as the way it's going. And if things aren't going well, right, we can stop that sucker
(05:58):
over at any time. So this concept of you canbegin your day again at any point has literally been life changing. For me, there's a part of us I think that when
things get hot or things aren't going wellor right, or all the labels we put on it, we sometimes just want to, like, pull the cover up over our heads, or just say, Screw it.
(06:20):
And we can apply this to, like, lots ofdifferent things. Food's just an easy one. Let's just say you decided that you were going some particular habit, whether you
were going to start going to the gym or youwere going to stop eating a particular thing, right? And let's just use food, like I said, because it's universal and it's
pretty easy. So let's say you just decided,like, I'm not going to drink diet soda anymore. I'm not going to drink beer anymore. I'm not going to eat chocolate,
(06:44):
whatever the thing is. And then, lo andbehold, you find yourself doing the thing, or you say something like, I'm going to stop at one piece of pizza, whatever it is. And
then all of a sudden, like you're threedeep. You're like three pieces deep. And some little part of your ego mind says something like this, fuck it. You already
(07:04):
ruined it. Let's just keep going. Let's justkeep ruining it. Let's just like, make it worse. A, A, we do this because we're kind of, like insane, instead of just like,
noticing what we're doing, stopping it andnot creating further Havoc or further damage or whatever. We kind of throw up our hands in a little adult tantrum, and we just kind
(07:28):
of go, like, fuck it. I'll start tomorrowinstead. Or, Oh, I already blew it. And it's kind of like, it's kind of like, let's imagine you're driving a car and it's got
four tires, and you you get one flat orsomething, right? You drive in and you roll over a nail, whatever it is you get flat. Instead of just stopping and fixing that
flat, you just get out and slash all therest of your tie is like the other three, just the other three. You just totally disable yourself because you're, you're that
(07:58):
inner critic is beating you up so bad, andit also gives you an excuse to keep doing the behavior that you know isn't going to serve you right. So it's not logical in any
way that we would keep doing that, that wewould keep perpetuating our own suffering. And yet, we do it all the time, and a lot of it, it's because our ego, we are being
(08:20):
hijacked by that ego mind we are beinghijacked by that part of our mind that is trying to prove to us just how bad and guilty and shameful and all that that we
are. And if any of this sounds familiar,right? If you haven't already listened to my previous episode with my teacher, David Bedrick, it's the last episode The unshaming
(08:40):
way. It's such a powerful such a powerfulepisode, and I highly recommend that you give it a listen. So okay, here's the point I'm trying to make. If your day starts to go
to crap, just know
that you can always start your day again.You can start it like right over at any time. I don't care if it's 1030 at night, you still have an hour and a half left in
(09:04):
that day. You can start your day over at anypoint. And the most profound shift that you can have is to simply just start to shift your point of view, shift your perspective
on yourself and like what's going down, ashift in perspective. This isn't A Course in Miracles. We talk about how a shift in perspective in your mind from a thought
(09:27):
system of fear, fuck it. I already blew it.I'm stupid. I'm a mess. I'm like, all that criticism, all that judgment, all that attack. When we can shift out of that mode
and instead shift it to love that, in fact,is a miracle. And I think one of the things is that we sometimes forget, just like when we were little kids and we were playing a
(09:49):
game and we didn't like how it was going,and we would just go do over, like, it's like, there are no rules. There were no rules. Then, right, we're making up the
rules as we go, and there's. Really kind ofno rules now. So if your day starts off on the wrong foot, if your day starts to turn to shit, like if it really, if things start
(10:09):
to go badly, rather than continuing to leteverything go downhill, simply start your day over again. This is like genius. This is like genius, and we discount it, I think,
because it is so simple. So here are acouple of tools. So number one, here's what we need to do. We need to, number one, catch ourselves doing it. We need to catch
(10:34):
ourselves in that sabotaging act and noticethat we're doing that whole like I am determined to be miserable, so it's three o'clock, it's four o'clock, it's two,
whatever time it is, and you start torealize that you you not only have been sitting in your shitty diaper, you you want to keep sitting. When you start to notice
(10:54):
that, right? This is when we have theopportunity catch ourselves, recognize what we're doing, okay, and then choose differently, and then we get to choose
differently. There's a line in A Course inMiracles, and it basically says that, all right, I gotta, I gotta really think on this for a second. Hold on. Oh shoot. Okay. I
(11:21):
just remembered it's, this is the this is,this is a line, I'm paraphrasing, but it's like trials, trials, meaning trials and tribulations, tough times, whatever the
situation is, trials are but lessons thatyou failed to learn, these trials that are showing up now. They're just lessons that you failed to learn presented once again,
(11:43):
meaning it's coming back around. Right?Trials are but lessons you failed to learn presented once again. Where before? Right? Where before, you did this thing. Now you
can choose again. You can choosedifferently. You can choose peace instead of this, and this is such a helpful thing, all right? Number one, we got to slow down
(12:04):
enough to catch ourselves in the act, andthen, instead of meeting ourselves with judgment and cruelty and attack, we can simply just be curious and say, Oh,
interesting. I'm about to do the thingagain, right? Meet ourselves with a sense of humor, with compassion, with curiosity, and then choose differently. Okay? So here's a
couple of tools. First of all, literally,just take a big breath in when you're about to catch yourself when you're about to go into that loop. Just pause. Take a big deep
(12:33):
breath in, okay, and then we're going tobegin again. We're going to start our day all over again. So when we're all worked out, I wrote myself this note, when we're
all worked up and determined to stay in theshitty diaper, we might not immediately be able to remember all the great spiritual tools that we have in our spiritual toolkit.
So that's what I say. Like I have a lot oftools in my spiritual toolkit. I have a lot of ways to interrupt patterns, everything from breath work to bilateral simulation to
(13:01):
tapping to peripheral vision, like all thesetools that I've learned over the years, right? But when we're in a moment, when we're being hijacked by our ego, we might
not always be able to remember or access allthose tools, but something as simple and easy and fun as do over. I think all of us, I think all of us can probably, like,
(13:26):
remember that, right? I think we've got apretty good shot at remembering just yelling out do over, okay, so if my own mind starts to get squirrely and things are starting to
go in the shit out, right, I'm just like, ifI'm dangerously close, like, if I find myself dangerously close to either thinking, saying or doing something that I've
(13:47):
convinced myself might feel good in themoment, but I know that I'll probably regret later. It's really helpful to know that I can take a big breath in, stop right, choose
again, like shift my perspective,perspective, and to choose differently this time, to not just keep, like, not getting out of the car and slashing the rest of the
(14:07):
ties. And so, you know, I already blew it.It's like, No, I can begin again at any time. And so can you number two, this can be really helpful tool. When you change your
physical state, you change your emotionalstate, and that's what's really happening, is our thoughts are often driving our behaviors, our choices, our actions, our
(14:30):
patterns, our habits. You know, the thingsthat we're about to do or continue to do that's just going to self sabotage us and make it even harder for us to begin again,
right tomorrow. So when we change ourphysical state, it can significantly impact our emotional state. The mind and the body are connected. We all know this at this
(14:51):
point, not just spiritually. The scientistshave proven it right. So when we alter our physical posture, when we alter movement, or even how. Breathing, our breathing patterns.
We can totally influence our mood. We cantotally change our overall well being, our emotional well being. So here's the thing, if you want to feel better, move your body
(15:14):
differently. So here are some of the thingsI wrote down that you could do. You could say or shout out loud do over. And whenever I do that, right, it makes me laugh.
Laughter is powerful medicine. So that's anice pattern. Interrupt. You can literally get up, do some jumping jacks, dance around, literally go out a door and come back again,
(15:35):
signifying a new start. You can open awindow, breathe in some fresh air and just be like, do over I am starting fresh right? You can take some deep breaths. You can
place your hands on your heart, or you canplace your hands on your head. And when you're in that space, take a nice big breath in through your nose, exhale out twice as
(15:57):
long, and make a conscious decision tochange your mind, to shift your perspective. And I know that some of this might be like, there's no way that this works like this is
way too simple, but I swear, I swear, youguys, it works if you consciously choose to shift your mind, if you constantly, if you consciously choose to shift your body and to
(16:22):
choose something different. So do over, andI don't care if it's been three months, three weeks, three minutes, three hours, or whatever, we can interrupt the pattern that
we are going down that neural network in ourbrain, that we are just making that neural network stronger and stronger every time we do this pattern or this habit, and if we can
(16:45):
interrupt it, I'm telling you so much changecan happen. So don't feel like you're stuck. Don't feel like you have to be stuck. But, you know, with that adult tantrum and that
hijacked ego, mind and like, just like,again, think of it that way, literally. Oh, I've gotten one flat tire, and now I'm insisting on deflating the other three,
(17:06):
right? Like that is not gonna help or getyou anywhere. So this idea that you can start your day over at any time is so powerful. And look, there's no rules. You
are the captain of your own ship. You arethe CO creator of your life, and you can do whatever you need to do or want to do so that you're making better choices that
(17:28):
reflect who you really are, which is love.So I hope this has been helpful in some way. It's a quick one, it's a short one, but I was just thinking about it, and it came up
in a couple of different places, so I wantedto share it with you. So my desire is always to help you in some way, have some spiritual tools that we can apply to everyday living.
(17:50):
And look, we all have a story of ourselves,right, just like sabotaging ourselves, like right out of the gate and then just continuing to roll on down the road, just
going deeper and deeper into our owncircumstances that we've created that we know is not going to end well. So we can always choose again. Remember trials are but
(18:11):
lessons that we failed to learn presentedonce again, where before we made a faulty choice. We can now right. We can now our internal teacher calls to us, right? And
says, my brother, my sister, choose again.Choose differently. I could choose peace instead of this. Alright, you guys, any any way that
(18:34):
you want to find out about what I'm up to,what I'm doing, how we can work together, just go to Karen kenney.com it's all there on my website. I always love hearing from
you guys, and I hope this was helpful insome way. And I love you guys, and I appreciate you. Okay, wherever you go, may you leave yourself in the animals and the
place and the people, the environment,better than how you found it, wherever you go, may you your presence, your energy, your love, be a blessing. Bye, bye.
Hey you guys, welcome to the Karen Kenney show. I'm super duper excited to be here talking to you about this topic, which I'm not sure what I'm going to call. I
could call this episode a bunch of differentthings, but I'll probably call it something like starting your day over, just just starting that son of a bitch right over. You
(00:25):
ever have, oh my god, you ever have one ofthose days when before, maybe even before, your feet hit the floor, or not too long after that, you've already kind of like shot
yourself in the foot, whether it's with yourown pissy attitude, or breaking a promise to yourself, or doing something you said you were gonna do, like doing something not
(00:53):
doing something you said you were gonna do,or you find yourself doing something you said you weren't gonna do, and you're Just like, ah, like, just bug it. Like, I already
ruined it. It's already ruined. So I got tothinking about this because we were talking on a call for the nest. My The nest is my spiritual mentoring group, right? It's a
(01:14):
it's an experience, it's a program, it's acommunity. It's like, amazing people. And my friend who's in the group, was telling a story about how the other day at around,
like, four o'clock, she had found herself,like, in a mood. Excuse me, so she was like, kind of in a mood, and she had already just pretty much determined she's, like, it was
(01:38):
only four o'clock, but I knew, like, I wasgonna be in that mood, like I had just decided, like, the day is already shot. The rest of the day is already shot, and I'm
gonna, like, just gonna stay in this stateof mind. And so it got me to thinking about how a children's game, this little children's game that we played when we were
little kids, or this thing that we wouldcall out, could literally just like, like, it's like having a time traveling device. It's like, it's like being able to, like,
(02:07):
have, like, a white eraser board right onyour life, on your day, in your mind. And it's this simple thing where we it's a do over. It's like, can I just get a do over?
Like, I want to do over. And I know, like,if you were a kid. And I think I did an episode about this, something like this. It wasn't in the same exact angle, but it was
(02:28):
like 200 episodes ago, and it was liketalking about, like, can I just get a duo? VA, so when we were kids, one of the fun things about when you were a little kid and
you're playing a game, and if things aren'tgoing the way that you want them to. Like little kids will just randomly scream, do over, do over. But here's the thing, this
(02:51):
child like solution is still wicked good,like we can still put it to work and to use today as adults. So any time that your day is starting to turn to crap, or is already
turned to crap, right, pose like you're justlike, you realize, like, you just want to bang your face off your desk, because it's been one of those days. So I will say this
(03:16):
though, okay, so when you're in one of thosetizzies, when you're in one of those, like, panties in a bunch when you're in like, a mood, or you're just determined, determined
to self sabotage yourself, this child likesolution is way better than being hijacked by our cranky little bastard of an ego and acting childish, because that's one of the
(03:38):
things that happens when things aren't goingour way, or things aren't going the way we want them to we expect them to. Stuff isn't turning out, quote, unquote, right, right,
really, like, really, just how we hadprojected our preferences onto we can start to act like little spoiled brats. We start to have what I call like adult tantrums,
(04:00):
trust me, double Amen, hands if you knowwhat I'm talking about, if you did this. Okay. Okay, so I learned about this concept, of course, as a child, right when we would
just randomly scream out, do over, do over.But this concept also got solidified, and I re learned it, and I might do a whole podcast on this. I've been talking to my, my
(04:22):
one to one client, about this quite a bit,and my the people in the nest as well, about how so much of personal development work, mind shift work, spiritual mentoring, all
the different things you want to whateveryou want to call it, so much of it is about unlearning, learning and then relearning. So something that I learned and continue to
(04:44):
relearn all the time is a concept that Ilearned years ago in Al Anon. So if you don't know what Al Anon is, most people do, but if you don't, so there's aa. AA is, you
know, alcoholics, anonymous. And that's forpeople who find themselves needing help with addiction to substances or whatever. Right to booze, alcohol. Al Anon is for people who
(05:11):
have you know, found themselves inrelationships, whether that's parental, like your family, your sister, your brother, a friend, your sweetie, whoever. So this is
for the people who like, quote, unquote, asthey would say, Love the alcoholics, right? So I used to go to Al Anon. I've often jokingly said I have been lucky enough to
(05:32):
know and love quite a few alcoholics in mylifetime. So in Al Anon, though, there's this concept that is like you are not sentenced, like you are not inflicted by
right? You are not sentenced to having a badday, meaning we are not stuck with the day as the way it's going. And if things aren't going well, right, we can stop that sucker
(05:58):
over at any time. So this concept of you canbegin your day again at any point has literally been life changing. For me, there's a part of us I think that when
things get hot or things aren't going wellor right, or all the labels we put on it, we sometimes just want to, like, pull the cover up over our heads, or just say, Screw it.
(06:20):
And we can apply this to, like, lots ofdifferent things. Food's just an easy one. Let's just say you decided that you were going some particular habit, whether you
were going to start going to the gym or youwere going to stop eating a particular thing, right? And let's just use food, like I said, because it's universal and it's
pretty easy. So let's say you just decided,like, I'm not going to drink diet soda anymore. I'm not going to drink beer anymore. I'm not going to eat chocolate,
(06:44):
whatever the thing is. And then, lo andbehold, you find yourself doing the thing, or you say something like, I'm going to stop at one piece of pizza, whatever it is. And
then all of a sudden, like you're threedeep. You're like three pieces deep. And some little part of your ego mind says something like this, fuck it. You already
(07:04):
ruined it. Let's just keep going. Let's justkeep ruining it. Let's just like, make it worse. A, A, we do this because we're kind of, like insane, instead of just like,
noticing what we're doing, stopping it andnot creating further Havoc or further damage or whatever. We kind of throw up our hands in a little adult tantrum, and we just kind
(07:28):
of go, like, fuck it. I'll start tomorrowinstead. Or, Oh, I already blew it. And it's kind of like, it's kind of like, let's imagine you're driving a car and it's got
four tires, and you you get one flat orsomething, right? You drive in and you roll over a nail, whatever it is you get flat. Instead of just stopping and fixing that
flat, you just get out and slash all therest of your tie is like the other three, just the other three. You just totally disable yourself because you're, you're that
(07:58):
inner critic is beating you up so bad, andit also gives you an excuse to keep doing the behavior that you know isn't going to serve you right. So it's not logical in any
way that we would keep doing that, that wewould keep perpetuating our own suffering. And yet, we do it all the time, and a lot of it, it's because our ego, we are being
(08:20):
hijacked by that ego mind we are beinghijacked by that part of our mind that is trying to prove to us just how bad and guilty and shameful and all that that we
are. And if any of this sounds familiar,right? If you haven't already listened to my previous episode with my teacher, David Bedrick, it's the last episode The unshaming
(08:40):
way. It's such a powerful such a powerfulepisode, and I highly recommend that you give it a listen. So okay, here's the point I'm trying to make. If your day starts to go
to crap, just know
that you can always start your day again.You can start it like right over at any time. I don't care if it's 1030 at night, you still have an hour and a half left in
(09:04):
that day. You can start your day over at anypoint. And the most profound shift that you can have is to simply just start to shift your point of view, shift your perspective
on yourself and like what's going down, ashift in perspective. This isn't A Course in Miracles. We talk about how a shift in perspective in your mind from a thought
(09:27):
system of fear, fuck it. I already blew it.I'm stupid. I'm a mess. I'm like, all that criticism, all that judgment, all that attack. When we can shift out of that mode
and instead shift it to love that, in fact,is a miracle. And I think one of the things is that we sometimes forget, just like when we were little kids and we were playing a
(09:49):
game and we didn't like how it was going,and we would just go do over, like, it's like, there are no rules. There were no rules. Then, right, we're making up the
rules as we go, and there's. Really kind ofno rules now. So if your day starts off on the wrong foot, if your day starts to turn to shit, like if it really, if things start
(10:09):
to go badly, rather than continuing to leteverything go downhill, simply start your day over again. This is like genius. This is like genius, and we discount it, I think,
because it is so simple. So here are acouple of tools. So number one, here's what we need to do. We need to, number one, catch ourselves doing it. We need to catch
(10:34):
ourselves in that sabotaging act and noticethat we're doing that whole like I am determined to be miserable, so it's three o'clock, it's four o'clock, it's two,
whatever time it is, and you start torealize that you you not only have been sitting in your shitty diaper, you you want to keep sitting. When you start to notice
(10:54):
that, right? This is when we have theopportunity catch ourselves, recognize what we're doing, okay, and then choose differently, and then we get to choose
differently. There's a line in A Course inMiracles, and it basically says that, all right, I gotta, I gotta really think on this for a second. Hold on. Oh shoot. Okay. I
(11:21):
just remembered it's, this is the this is,this is a line, I'm paraphrasing, but it's like trials, trials, meaning trials and tribulations, tough times, whatever the
situation is, trials are but lessons thatyou failed to learn, these trials that are showing up now. They're just lessons that you failed to learn presented once again,
(11:43):
meaning it's coming back around. Right?Trials are but lessons you failed to learn presented once again. Where before? Right? Where before, you did this thing. Now you
can choose again. You can choosedifferently. You can choose peace instead of this, and this is such a helpful thing, all right? Number one, we got to slow down
(12:04):
enough to catch ourselves in the act, andthen, instead of meeting ourselves with judgment and cruelty and attack, we can simply just be curious and say, Oh,
interesting. I'm about to do the thingagain, right? Meet ourselves with a sense of humor, with compassion, with curiosity, and then choose differently. Okay? So here's a
couple of tools. First of all, literally,just take a big breath in when you're about to catch yourself when you're about to go into that loop. Just pause. Take a big deep
(12:33):
breath in, okay, and then we're going tobegin again. We're going to start our day all over again. So when we're all worked out, I wrote myself this note, when we're
all worked up and determined to stay in theshitty diaper, we might not immediately be able to remember all the great spiritual tools that we have in our spiritual toolkit.
So that's what I say. Like I have a lot oftools in my spiritual toolkit. I have a lot of ways to interrupt patterns, everything from breath work to bilateral simulation to
(13:01):
tapping to peripheral vision, like all thesetools that I've learned over the years, right? But when we're in a moment, when we're being hijacked by our ego, we might
not always be able to remember or access allthose tools, but something as simple and easy and fun as do over. I think all of us, I think all of us can probably, like,
(13:26):
remember that, right? I think we've got apretty good shot at remembering just yelling out do over, okay, so if my own mind starts to get squirrely and things are starting to
go in the shit out, right, I'm just like, ifI'm dangerously close, like, if I find myself dangerously close to either thinking, saying or doing something that I've
(13:47):
convinced myself might feel good in themoment, but I know that I'll probably regret later. It's really helpful to know that I can take a big breath in, stop right, choose
again, like shift my perspective,perspective, and to choose differently this time, to not just keep, like, not getting out of the car and slashing the rest of the
(14:07):
ties. And so, you know, I already blew it.It's like, No, I can begin again at any time. And so can you number two, this can be really helpful tool. When you change your
physical state, you change your emotionalstate, and that's what's really happening, is our thoughts are often driving our behaviors, our choices, our actions, our
(14:30):
patterns, our habits. You know, the thingsthat we're about to do or continue to do that's just going to self sabotage us and make it even harder for us to begin again,
right tomorrow. So when we change ourphysical state, it can significantly impact our emotional state. The mind and the body are connected. We all know this at this
(14:51):
point, not just spiritually. The scientistshave proven it right. So when we alter our physical posture, when we alter movement, or even how. Breathing, our breathing patterns.
We can totally influence our mood. We cantotally change our overall well being, our emotional well being. So here's the thing, if you want to feel better, move your body
(15:14):
differently. So here are some of the thingsI wrote down that you could do. You could say or shout out loud do over. And whenever I do that, right, it makes me laugh.
Laughter is powerful medicine. So that's anice pattern. Interrupt. You can literally get up, do some jumping jacks, dance around, literally go out a door and come back again,
(15:35):
signifying a new start. You can open awindow, breathe in some fresh air and just be like, do over I am starting fresh right? You can take some deep breaths. You can
place your hands on your heart, or you canplace your hands on your head. And when you're in that space, take a nice big breath in through your nose, exhale out twice as
(15:57):
long, and make a conscious decision tochange your mind, to shift your perspective. And I know that some of this might be like, there's no way that this works like this is
way too simple, but I swear, I swear, youguys, it works if you consciously choose to shift your mind, if you constantly, if you consciously choose to shift your body and to
(16:22):
choose something different. So do over, andI don't care if it's been three months, three weeks, three minutes, three hours, or whatever, we can interrupt the pattern that
we are going down that neural network in ourbrain, that we are just making that neural network stronger and stronger every time we do this pattern or this habit, and if we can
(16:45):
interrupt it, I'm telling you so much changecan happen. So don't feel like you're stuck. Don't feel like you have to be stuck. But, you know, with that adult tantrum and that
hijacked ego, mind and like, just like,again, think of it that way, literally. Oh, I've gotten one flat tire, and now I'm insisting on deflating the other three,
(17:06):
right? Like that is not gonna help or getyou anywhere. So this idea that you can start your day over at any time is so powerful. And look, there's no rules. You
are the captain of your own ship. You arethe CO creator of your life, and you can do whatever you need to do or want to do so that you're making better choices that
(17:28):
reflect who you really are, which is love.So I hope this has been helpful in some way. It's a quick one, it's a short one, but I was just thinking about it, and it came up
in a couple of different places, so I wantedto share it with you. So my desire is always to help you in some way, have some spiritual tools that we can apply to everyday living.
(17:50):
And look, we all have a story of ourselves,right, just like sabotaging ourselves, like right out of the gate and then just continuing to roll on down the road, just
going deeper and deeper into our owncircumstances that we've created that we know is not going to end well. So we can always choose again. Remember trials are but
(18:11):
lessons that we failed to learn presentedonce again, where before we made a faulty choice. We can now right. We can now our internal teacher calls to us, right? And
says, my brother, my sister, choose again.Choose differently. I could choose peace instead of this. Alright, you guys, any any way that
(18:34):
you want to find out about what I'm up to,what I'm doing, how we can work together, just go to Karen kenney.com it's all there on my website. I always love hearing from
you guys, and I hope this was helpful insome way. And I love you guys, and I appreciate you. Okay, wherever you go, may you leave yourself in the animals and the
place and the people, the environment,better than how you found it, wherever you go, may you your presence, your energy, your love, be a blessing. Bye, bye.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Special Summer Offer: Exclusively on Apple Podcasts, try our Dateline Premium subscription completely free for one month! With Dateline Premium, you get every episode ad-free plus exclusive bonus content.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!