October 15, 2025 • 45 mins
A woman is “found dead.” The headline ends there, but the story doesn’t—and neither does our responsibility. Ingrid sits with Vanessa and Yaneth to honor Lizzbeth by name, define femicide without euphemism, and follow the thread from a family’s search to a community’s demand for change. What emerges is both deeply personal and relentlessly systemic: a town that looked away, a police response that lagged, and a courtroom outcome negotiated on the killer’s terms.
Vanessa, founder of Vivan Las Autonomas, explains how a small group of young immigrant women stepped into the vacuum—pressuring investigators, guiding a family through pre-trial and trial twists, and partnering with media to cover Lizzbeth as a whole person, not a headline. We talk about why survivors often look “emotional” while abusers appear “credible,” how passive language like “woman found dead” erases intent, and why undercounted data distorts policy. The result is a cycle where agencies tally cases, police move on, and the public accepts femicide as an isolated tragedy rather than a pattern we can interrupt.
We go deeper into plea deals, the narrowness of legal charges, and what “justice” feels like when key harms—tampering with evidence, the presence of a child, the brutality of disposal—don’t show up on the charging sheet. Then we widen the lens to prevention: treating femicide as a public health crisis, funding multilingual rapid response, building cross-agency protocols for missing women, and using art and data together to change hearts, habits, and budgets. Vanessa shares details of an upcoming Connecticut femicide site that memorializes victims, tracks cases, and gives communities leverage with lawmakers.
Lizzbeth was a mother, a sister, and a bright, funny presence who deserved safety—and a system ready to act. If you’re ready to move beyond thoughts and prayers to concrete action, listen, share, and join the work. Subscribe for more stories, leave a review to boost visibility, and tell us: what would real accountability look like where you live?
Links:
https://www.1in3podcast.com/guests/vivan-las-autonomas/
https://www.instagram.com/vivanlasautonomas/
https://www.facebook.com/vivanlasautonomas/
1 in 3 is intended for mature audiences. Episodes contain explicit content and may be triggering to some.
If you are in the United States and need help right now, call the national domestic violence hotline at 800-799-7233 or text the word “start” to 88788.
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Thank you for listening!
Cover art by Laura Swift Dahlke
Music by Tim Crowe
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
Hi, Warriors.
Welcome to One and Three.
I'm your host, Ingrid.
As I've shared over the last fewepisodes, this year's Domestic
Violence Awareness Month carriestwo powerful themes with
Survivors Always and EveryoneKnows Someone.
Today's episode reflects both.
I'm honored to welcome Vanessaand Yannet, who will share the
(00:23):
advocacy work of Vivan LasAutonomas and the story of
Yannet's sister, Lisbeth.
Let's get started.
Hi, ladies.
Thank you so much for joining metoday.
How are you?
unknown (00:37):
Good.
SPEAKER_02 (00:38):
How are you?
SPEAKER_00 (00:39):
Good, thanks.
Um, before we get into ourconversation, do you mind just
giving a little bit of abackground on yourselves just so
the listeners get to know yousome?
SPEAKER_03 (00:50):
My name is Vanessa Sarah.
Um, I'm a moving boardimmigrant, based in advocate.
Uh, I'm a community organizerand advocate.
Um, I founded by NASA Alabama,um, which is an organization
that supports and organizesfamilies impacted by femicide,
(01:13):
as well as supporting survivors,victims of domestic and sexual
violence.
SPEAKER_00 (01:19):
Okay.
Do you want to talk about alittle bit more about your
organization?
And I mean, you you mentionedalready what it does, but and
I'm sure most people understandwhat femicide is, but just to
bring everybody up to speed sowe're all on the same page.
SPEAKER_03 (01:35):
Of course, no, I usually have the question.
I actually found it in my workthat most people don't know what
femicide is, both in English andin Spanish.
Um, femicide is the intentionalkilling of a woman because of
her gender.
Um and, you know, I came intothis word and bringing awareness
(01:56):
about feminicide because of whathappened to Easter and her
killing in 2020.
Um it was at a time where Imyself had been years um of the
judicial system as a survivor ofsexual abuse and that
(02:16):
experience.
And then I heard about Lisa thatshe had listed for some time and
that she was then found.
Um and there was no communityorganizing around the time,
despite that there are a lot ofa little bit like advocacy
groups in the area, but therewas no focus to uh gender
(02:41):
violence, um, and there was nouh really advocacy around what
happens when missing when womenare missing in our community, or
what happens when women areemerging in our community
because of domestic violence,because of the part of violence.
Um and so, you know, we've gotmessaged over not started that
(03:05):
work started really um inresponse to uh the need for
these best family at the time,um, who was looking for
community and support tonavigate something that was so
unexpected and traumatic andthat um as a community, right,
we hadn't yet known how to howto come together uh in this way,
(03:29):
right?
How to break from this idea thatuh domestic violence happens to
just one person and it's anisolated issue, um, and to look
at really how is this acommunity issue?
Um, how are we failed to respondto this, um, right?
And who are the entities thatare failing to respond, right?
(03:50):
And in Miss Bett's case, um shewas living in a town in Captain
that was predominantly white,um, and uh predominantly a lot
of Italian families.
Um, it was not a very welcominguh community to immigrants.
Um, in fact, it had the historyof actually the police being
(04:13):
very violent and racist towardsthe immigrants.
Um, and there was like the thethere was a whole FBI
investigation.
Um and so it, you know, whenwhen Lee Smith was missing and
when everything was happening,it was no surprise that folks in
East Haven were not talkingabout it, were acting as if it
(04:36):
didn't matter yet in this smalllittle town that I grew up in
when I moved to Connecticut, um,I know that if it had been a
white woman that had gonemissing, a young white mother,
27 years old, Libany Smith, um,I know it would have been a talk
of the town.
And um, it was very hurtful tome, um, you know, as an imminent
(05:00):
ranking lifter for someone tofeel like so if something
happens to us, no one cares, noone asks questions, no one says
anything.
Um and so our work began both intrying to uh raise awareness
within the community, but alsocalling out um the town
officials, the mayor, the policedepartment, you know, why aren't
(05:22):
they doing more?
You know, why aren't they doingmore?
Because frankly, from from ourend, you know, the family did so
much, Yagi did so much, thesister did so much.
Um, and the justice that we havegotten today for these baiths,
everything that we've gotten forthese baths has really been
because of the family and andtheir willingness to fight for
(05:43):
justice and to not give up andto make sure that you know her
story is known and it doesn'tjust end uh i in this in the
violent way that her life wastaken, but that there's really
more to her story than that.
Um so I think that you know whenyou when you walk with families
(06:04):
through this journey that that'sbeen more than four years, um,
you know, you you learn so muchnot just about what things could
have been done, how we as acommunity could intervene to
stop this.
Um, but you learn so much tooabout how these systems are
failing uh women, whether theyreport or not, right?
(06:24):
It's it's really not about us orthis burden that is placed on
victims to um to do everythingin order to prevent our deaths.
It's just too much.
SPEAKER_00 (06:34):
So before we get into Lisbeth's uh story in a
little bit more detail, I knowin that case you guys jumped
right in and you were helpingwith the investigation and all
of that.
Is there anything else that yourorganization does besides
helping with uh findinginformation and seeking justice?
SPEAKER_03 (06:53):
Yeah, so we help families navigate um the legal
system, right?
Um, when it both from, you know,before police make an arrest,
pushing police to make anarrest, right, to move on
something when an arrest ismade, navigate the whole process
pre-trial to trial.
Um, outside of that, too, youknow, we do um community
organizing, we've done campaignsto specifically raise awareness
(07:14):
in cases of feminicide, like inthe space case, also in the case
of Roya Bohamali, who's anAfghan Muslim woman who was
murdered, and her case has, youknow, not been properly
investigated by police.
Um, and so we do a lot of umcultural and artistic events in
the community, um, vigils andart festivals, all that are
(07:36):
really dedicated to not justraising awareness about domestic
violence, about femicide, aboutsexual violence, but also really
um trying to make a shift, youknow, in our in our culture, in
our society, as far as how weunderstand these issues and how
uh we understand what we're ableto do about it, right?
(07:56):
Because many of us, even when wegrieve for the loss of a woman,
we we still see it as somethinglike, well, I what could I have
done, right?
If she didn't report, if shedidn't do this, right?
And in reality, there's so manythings that we as a community
can be doing to help make thatthat shift in society, and so
(08:17):
that the burden isn't always onthe victims, because a lot of
the time victims are alreadydoing a lot to get themselves
out of these situations.
And I just don't think thatwe're meeting where we need to
be.
And their best, right, provesthat.
And then when we're not takingthe time to really stop and
(08:38):
process what what led to thevictims, right?
What was what happened to reallyunpack that, um, then we're
losing this opportunity, right?
That is to learn from that andto really prevent it in a real
way.
Um, because we say that domesticviolence is preventable and we
know that it is, and yet when ithappens, we almost accept that
(09:00):
it's it it just it just sort ofhappens in our communities,
right?
SPEAKER_00 (09:05):
Yeah, definitely.
Uh and I I so appreciate whatyour organization is doing
because you know, victims, evenif they survive, they're still
very much victimized, and it'sreally difficult for them to
seek justice on their own.
And the perpetrators or theabusers are typically very uh
(09:27):
removed from any sort of uhempathy or accountability of
what they've done.
So they actually can go in andbe calm and collected and look
like they're the ones who arenot the crazy one.
The victim a lot of the timeslooks like they are the crazy
individual because they're soemotional from the abuse that
(09:48):
they've been experiencing.
So I really appreciate the workthat you guys are doing with the
victims and and families andseeking justice.
Um, I know in this case, youhadn't just started your
organization, right?
SPEAKER_03 (10:01):
Like, so how did you a collective of girls?
We were just young.
Um, we were all around Yanni'sage, and um we had done you know
years of organizing around theimmigrant community, and so we
had that experience.
Um and we had just come up likeum doing a lot of work to
(10:27):
support independently victims ofum domestic and sexual violence,
we're doing correctness withfundraisers, um, getting
emergent to five, getting um youknow, working to take the hotel,
we're doing that at a smallscale.
Um, but then you know, I'm gonnado it.
So it was like there's someoneworking back.
(10:52):
And I think the fact that it wassome point on the door that it's
part of this police, I don'tknow what that was a gap in of
like no one's actuallyresponding to gender violence
after advocacy groups, notorganized groups, right?
We don't we don't have a placefor families to go to when it's
(11:15):
happy other than the police.
But what do you do when thepolice aren't responding, right?
What do you do when the policeare believing the lives of the
perpetrator?
What do you do when you knowthey're violent to properly,
right?
And this idea that, oh, womenjust kick off, women just
disappear, women just abandontheir families, right?
What do you do when police areso violent and you know fail to
(11:40):
respond with urgency to thedepths of black family women so
much, right?
And there's no community groupthat is that is there to fill
that need, right?
And so we started as a group ofyoung women who just really
wanted to be there for youngmen, um, who also had sisters
and could imagine what thiswould be like if we got you know
(12:04):
our sister went listening andyou know we would have turned to
each other.
And so that's kind of how westarted, and um, frankly, like
Yankee's courage and her, youknow, that fire of just like
that that's inside you that Ithink that it she really was
(12:26):
away for us, you know.
We were right there behind her,and we had her her side, her
back, the front, but it was itwas really her um showing us
like what do you do when yoursister's missing, you know, and
she went in and she did a lot ofthe groundwork before um we got
connected with her.
And I think a lot of our workwas sort of helping also
(12:48):
navigate with the media becausethey weren't covering this issue
and what does it look like whenthey do start to cover this
issue, but how to do it in asensitive way, in a way that
honors the victim's life, right?
Not just that moment of deathand how she was found, because
you know, it it was very violentand very brutal.
Um, though not just the way inwhich she was killed, but the
(13:09):
aftermath of it too.
Um, and and and the way that youknow he tried to discard her
body.
That was another form ofviolence, that was another way
of killing her again, you know.
So I think that um it, you know,really we we stand because you
know Yami's experience herfamily taught us that, you know,
(13:30):
so many families are left reallyalone when they're when their
loved one who is a woman iskilled, who, you know, when
police say a woman quote isfound dead, there's really a lot
more to that.
And often because of the way themedia portrays it, which is
similar to the way policeportray it, which is just women
found dead, we don't askquestions and we think that it's
(13:52):
that maybe they die.
We just like want to assume theydie as a non-violent way, but
that's usually not the case, youknow, when a woman is found
dead.
Um, you know, that doesn't justcoincidentally happen.
You know, we're not just birdsdropping from the sky.
Um, especially when they'refound in their homes, you know,
like women were killedviolently.
Um, and I think that it's it'svery harmful the way that you
(14:17):
know the media continues andpolice um to sort of minimize um
this issue of femicide, right?
Of just like, oh, domesticviolence is an isolated issue
when it's not, and we see ithappening across our
communities, um, across race,across um language, across
economic status, acrosseverything, you know.
SPEAKER_00 (14:39):
Yeah, and so I I you and I talked before, and I said
I had heard the story on uhanother podcast.
And as I was listening, I wasjust infuriated with hearing how
much of the investigative workwas done by the family.
And I just uh I thought that wasnot fair, but of course the part
(14:59):
that was sticking out to me wasdomestic violence and the
frustration that I had with alot of domestic violence cases,
is where it's it's just easierto believe the perpetrator than
to really dig into it.
Uh for those listeners who arenot familiar with the story, do
you guys mind sharing a littlebit as much as you want in
(15:20):
whatever detail as far as whathappened?
SPEAKER_03 (15:23):
My name is Tatan, and I think at the time uh with
her boyfriend Jonathan, and hewas also the father of her
child.
And you know, what we came tofind out, you know, was that
(15:45):
Jonathan uh killed these babe umin the early dollars of her
birthday.
Um he buried her body uh behinddumpsters uh in a Brantford
restaurant called La Michael'srestaurant, uh an Italian
(16:07):
restaurant that he used to workat.
Um he knew that the restaurantwould be shut by the holidays,
and he used that to hisadvantage to bury her body
there.
Um Lizbeth was missing uh fordays, um, and that's sort of how
(16:39):
uh it all started because youknow I think as a sister, Yanni
knew like there was somethingwrong, and um her sister who was
a dedicated living mother wouldnot just abandon her child under
any circumstance, and so umthings just weren't adding up.
(16:59):
Um, but Jonathan had uh a stringof lies um and deceptions and uh
really tried to manipulate thefamily into believing um that
she she abandoned him and theirchild and um you know fed the
(17:20):
same lies to police um to getpolice to not look for her, um,
even though the family wasreporting her missing.
SPEAKER_00 (17:33):
When he finally went to trial, um I think one of the
things that uh stuck out to mewas his ultimate sentence and
how even that was unfair and itwas not really a form of justice
because he was able to accept aa plea deal.
So even as he's being tried forthis crime, um he still was able
(18:01):
to almost control or navigatewhat his final outcome was.
And from what I understand, youguys were frustrated with that
as well.
SPEAKER_03 (18:12):
Yeah, yeah, I think it was very um, I think,
disrespectful um overall, notjust to his best memory, but I
think to the family who's youknow carried this pain for
years, and even though trialwould have been its its own
painful process, um, that's aright that they have to choose.
(18:37):
Um, if if they prefer that andtaking those risks to get closer
to what feels like justice, youknow.
And I, you know, I think thestate spends so much time always
telling families that you knowthere's so much a possibility of
losing with jurors, you neverknow.
And even sometimes they haveevidence and they have video
(18:59):
footage, and the juror stillends up bringing down the
charges from you know frommurder to attempted
manslaughter, and so there'salways this constant um talk and
pressure from the state thatlike you know it's not worth
going to to trial, there's toomany um risks, we don't have
(19:22):
enough uh in terms of evidence,and it's frustrating to hear
that because if they don't haveenough evidence, that's that's
the police to wake, you know,that's not in the family.
And um, you know, you wouldthink after everything, and even
the fact that FBI comes involvedat some point, you would think
(19:43):
that um there would be moreevidence.
Um and so to hear that even whenyou have a family that's doing
everything going above andbeyond, because right, police uh
when police don't react withurgency, right, and they fail to
collect evidence in due time,right?
Whether it's footage or whetherit's whatever, um, you know,
(20:05):
that has a lasting impact.
And you know, when police give,when police perform differently
in certain cases in certaininvestigations, right, because
of white women or because of animmigrant woman or whatever,
that has a lasting impact,right?
And so the state felt positive,they felt like they didn't have
enough um to go to trial.
(20:28):
And for us, it was just like itit's not, you know, what when
you ask a family what is theamount of years that would feel
right, there is no number.
Um, when you ask a family whatis it about the charges, it's
both a yes and a no.
Because, you know, for beinghonest, at the end of the day,
(20:52):
all he was charged with wasmurder, but he didn't just kill
her.
You know, it's the way hedisposed of her body.
There are charges for that whenyou tamper with elements, when
you move a body.
There's so man, there was um achild who was present um when
this happened.
And whether she saw it or not,she was with in the home.
You know, there are risks ofinjury to a minor charges that
(21:14):
could have been applied, butthat wasn't there.
So if we're talking aboutcharges, there's yes, there's a
list of charges that could havegone on, right?
Um, strangulation, right?
She was strangled to death.
We she could have been chargedfor that.
And when there were plea dealsthat were discussed in the
process, right, that was one ofit.
Like they they at one point thestate wanted to reduce the
(21:36):
murder charge and offer him, ifhe was willing to do more years,
reduce it to manslaughter andwith strangulation, and I think
with a tampering evidencecharge.
It was like three chargecombination that would result in
like 20, 50, 35 years, and theywould sort of let the judge
(21:58):
decide what the what the yearswould be between that range.
And you know, that that was a nofor a definite no because even
though it had the stimulationfrom the other stuff, it was
like he had accidentallymurdered her.
There was this there was nothingaccidental about this.
This was all premeditated.
(22:20):
And to to let him off the hookin that way is is is very
insulting to her memory, and towhat actually happened, you
know.
At the end of the day, Lee Smithhas a daughter who's gonna grow
up to want to know the truth anddeserves to know the truth,
right?
And and those journeys is not areflection of what really
(22:40):
happened, you know, and itdoesn't honor Beast, it doesn't
honor her story, it doesn'thonor her loved ones who have
fought so hard for truth andjustice, right?
Um, so we pushed back heavily onthat, and you know, I think it
got to a point where Jonathanstarted to understand that the
(23:02):
family was willing to go totrial, um, if it meant making
sure that we we had a murdercharge on the table.
And you know, I think thatscared him.
And I think that's why lastminute he sort of um and you
said at the end of the day, itwas still on his terms.
He always made things on histerms, and the state was always
(23:24):
it felt like giving into histerms and conditions of what
he's willing.
It was always he's not willingto do more than 20.
That was always clear to us.
He's not willing to do more than20.
I was like, I don't care.
Did he just did he make that upwhen he killed her?
Like, I don't understand, youknow, what gives him the right.
Um, but it was it it was reallyfar right, and you know, I think
(23:47):
last night he ends up decidinghe would stick with the writer
charge, um, but only if he didthe minimum amount of years,
which was 25.
He wasn't going to risk doing upto 60.
And, you know, once the stateheard that they were like,
great, it's a plea murder, welove it.
We'll take it.
And it was enough for them.
(24:08):
And it's hard to fight the stateand to expect them to do well in
a trial when they already feellike they have enough um
justice, right?
Even if that's not enough forthe family.
Um, how do you the state isn'tadvocating for you, right?
Like victims of femicide andtheir loved ones don't have an
(24:31):
attorney, don't have someonewho's representing their
interests.
The state is representing thestate's interests, and while,
yes, Lisbon is the victim, youknow, we don't spend enough
talking, enough time talkingabout, you know, the victims'
rights and their loved ones'rights in that way.
Um, and so it very much feelslike these cases sort of
revolver with the perpetratorwith the killers willing to
(24:55):
acknowledge what they're willingto do.
Um and it's hard because a lotof the time they don't have
resources.
Um, and resources takes lesslike very many, many forms, has
many forms, right?
It's not just financialresources, it's also the support
that you have from family andfriends.
Like that's a huge, hugeresource that a lot of the
(25:18):
victims don't have, thatfamilies in tactic by femicide
don't have.
They're grieving, right?
They're not here building theirnetwork and getting all their
alliances, like they're grievingand they're trying to navigate a
system while just whilegrieving.
And so I think that you know,visas have such a vantage point,
and the system is in many waysset up for them to support them,
(25:42):
not to support the families orthe victims.
Um, and so you know, the termswere sort of set by him, and the
state felt like it was enough,and so families, I feel like,
are just kind of shuffled alongthe process.
Um and it's very grateful.
And I think that um, especiallywhen you have families that are
(26:05):
just pouring into giving so muchto make sure that there is
justice.
Um, I don't I don't think youknow the state has the right to
give up on bad links or to or tobring less to the table, you
know, and and I understand thatjuries and jurors help how
complicated all of that is.
Um, but that is also why we dothat, you know, working in the
(26:25):
community, that cultural work.
Because yeah, we have to get toa point where we're
understanding these issues whereit's not about the evidence.
How much evidence do I have?
Can I see the footage of how hedid this and why he did this?
Like if we're not always gonnahave all of that evidence, but
we have enough information,data, and research about
(26:46):
domestic violence, about partnerviolence, about all this results
in um the deaths of women.
And so I think we need to stopturning away from it, right?
And when you see the theconnections, like the dump, we
need to make those connections.
Like a lot of times we don'tidentify the women who have been
killed as victims of domesticviolence.
(27:06):
Or if we do, it's not until muchlater, you know, and and that's
that's harmful for communitiesbecause it is not helping us
understand like how often it ishappening and how real a public
issue is within our communities.
SPEAKER_00 (27:21):
You are so right on so many levels of what you just
said.
Um, you know, the statistics areoff and the statistics matter
because when you have the theappropriate statistics, that's
what pushes for change and getsthe attention of lawmakers and
the legal system as far as okay,these statistics look really
bad, we need to do somethingabout it now.
(27:43):
Um the judicial system a lot oftimes does look at what their
idea of justice is, and they dooften forget what justice means
to family and to victims.
And victims often turn into acase.
And I don't I don't want that tohappen with Lise Beth.
(28:05):
She was a person.
So I would love for you guys totalk about her.
Let let us know the kind ofperson she was, the kind of mom,
the kind of sister that she was,and let's just talk about her as
a person.
So we because we all need toremember that victims, it's not
just a tragic story, it's aperson.
SPEAKER_02 (28:32):
Um I don't remember um it's probably 15, and it was
probably like 12, 13, 12.
So yeah, like that, like that.
(29:07):
Um we're gloved and all that,but she did her best.
(29:27):
I know she did.
And when she became a mother.
She surprised me on horn becauseshe became kind of like that
mother that she never never hadin her life.
So she was very um very caring.
As she um she was bornpremature, she was about six,
(29:52):
seven months.
So um, for her to become amother as well was very, very
difficult.
unknown (29:59):
Um
SPEAKER_00 (31:03):
For those of us who never had the opportunity to
meet her, is there anything thatyou would want us to
specifically know about her?
SPEAKER_02 (31:14):
I wanted to talk to the time for people that she's
lovely.
And that's all I just want tosay.
She'll have a person that willbother anyone.
She'll just like go back towork.
(31:36):
She'll come back to her family.
Trying to be with the levels aswell, which is very funny and
very good as well.
(31:59):
Like I said, you can't bother.
No at least like, oh, it's gonnause that.
Just emotional secretity.
Or something too.
Yeah, for her own.
But um in my opinion, she justdidn't have a lot too too left.
(32:26):
Yeah.
I don't I don't think he was thelove of her life.
I think she got that.
They met when they were veryyoung and they went.
She met when she was in highschool, so and they're more like
(32:50):
ten years or so, so the personthat was great.
(33:17):
You know, come into a newcountry where you're not the
language, you're not the peopleyou already know your neighbors.
Kind of like the couple friendsthat you have, you just have to
stick to.
It's much easier than homesometimes.
(33:41):
Also for us to like open upabout this area.
It's kinda like a whole lot ofit.
You know, from where we comefrom.
You know, we know the neighbors,we know who's around, and it's
(34:04):
it's it's just different inculture, it's completely
different in here, but it's justso that you have to hide, you
know, before you pretend likeyou're not there.
Um but yeah, it's it's it's justthe fear of putting all those
(34:29):
things out there too.
They were lucky in so manyaspects, um It's unfortunately
(34:54):
that this happened.
Um things have happened to a lotof women.
Um we've seen this a lot as wellin Mexico, but I know so because
I have to be the none that talksabout it.
Um but it it affects you themost when it's what's happened
to someone and you love someoneyou can.
(35:16):
So we start seeing a bigpicture, but it's just not only
one little thing.
It's beyond that.
It's a lot of things going on.
It's all starts with what thefamily hat.
(35:37):
It all starts with the you knowthe love you receive.
SPEAKER_00 (35:41):
Um she sounds like an amazing woman.
Amazing mom, maybe amazingsister.
Um Vanessa, if people want tolearn more about Vivan Les
Autonomous, um how do they howdo they get in touch?
SPEAKER_03 (36:00):
Um can follow our Instagram page, um Vivan Les
Autonomous, uh, which um inEnglish that means um long link
autonomous women.
Um and so we you know we believewomen have autonomy in terms of
you know the lifestyle they wantto live, who they want to love,
um, how they want to evolve, youknow.
(36:22):
I think that often what we'reseeing is that the way women are
current, often by people thatlove them because of who we are
and how we choose to live ourlives free um in autonomous way.
And um yeah, so we we do a lotof work in the community to
raise awareness around not justfemicide um but gendered
(36:43):
violence and all the ways itshows up.
Um so you can follow ourInstagram page.
Um, we have a link treeconnected out there, and we
don't have a website yet, but umwe are working um next year to
launch um Connecticut's firstfemicide website.
Um, and so we're really excitedabout that.
It's been um really a projectthat I've been working on since
(37:07):
the spent death.
Um I really wanted to understandhow else this was showing up in
our communities.
I wanted to understand how manywomen were missing and have been
murdered and what was funny withtheir stories and their cases.
And so since 2020, I've beentracking um the deaths of women
(37:28):
across Connecticut, allgender-related killings.
And so our goal is to launch awebsite next year.
Um, I it won't have all of ityet because I think we've
actually have quite a lot ofdatabase, um, which is it's
really sad that it's that many,but I think um we're really
excited for our initial launchbecause um we are not just
(37:54):
sharing um femicides acrossConnecticut as a form of data.
It really is more of an artisticproject.
It is really um a labor of love.
Um, and I think that you knowit's both a way to show elected
officials across our state thatthis is a serious issue that
(38:17):
it's actually not beingaddressed by the current
institutions and agencies thatare supposed to be addressing
this or they think that theyare, right?
Um and so I think it's gonnashow um the real uh of the
issue, you know, how prevalentis femicide.
Um, and frankly, our numbers umare more and different than the
(38:41):
numbers that um domesticviolence agencies are reporting
as far as fate families umbecause of domestic violence,
right?
And so what does it mean whenagencies are only counting
certain deaths, right?
And what does it look like whenwe actually have a higher number
of women in our state that arebeing killed because of gender
(39:03):
violence than what we thinkthere is.
Um, and I think that, you know,for us, it's really important
for folks to also understand uhwho these women were, right?
And that they had a story andthat they were someone, and that
um the the loss of of theirlife, of their light, um has a
(39:24):
tremendous impact and not justfor their loved ones, but um for
community members as well.
Um, you know, I I have seen umhow this devastates um beyond
family members.
And um I think you know it'sit's way past time that we don't
(39:44):
not just create the resourcesfor these families, but also
create a space that honors allof these victims and that helps
these families connect with oneanother and really feel like
they're not isolated in thistype of violence and this type
of grief and loss, um, thatunfortunately it's happening
form that we think it is.
(40:05):
Um, but that if we all, right,what would it look like if we
all came together and demandedthat our elected officials
really prioritizes, right?
Like what would it look like ifwe um the municipal level
started to issue that or you maybe aware of the fact that um
femicide is a public healthissue, that this is a crisis
(40:26):
that we're in, right?
What would it look like if ourlocal government started to look
and respond to it as that?
Um but we don't even have that.
Um we don't that's not aconversation we're having on a
local or state level, despite umnumerous deaths of women, you
know.
And and it's not it's immigrantwomen, it's black women, it's
white women, it's everyone.
(40:47):
And the the response has stillalways been the same.
Police investigate, you know,we'll take the trial, maybe,
maybe not.
There's a conviction, but that'sit.
There's nothing else other thanyou know funding domestic
violence agencies, which theyhave stated, they don't do
anything about the fact that awoman is killed because of
(41:08):
domestic violence, right?
Their job, their scope of theirwork goes up, you know, is as
far as women are alive.
But if they die or when theydie, that is that is not part of
their responsibilities or theirwork that they have to do.
They don't have to follow up,they don't have to look into
why, they don't have to reportto the state, you know, how how
they're going to change the whatthey're doing, their approach,
(41:30):
or nothing.
It doesn't require anything,even if the victim was being
serviced by that agency.
There is nothing they have to doother than report this victim
died because of domesticviolence.
That's it.
And, you know, that's that's notgetting us anywhere, right?
Especially when we have electedofficials that think these these
are the agencies that areresponding to their deaths, or
(41:50):
not, they're just reportingthem, they're not responding to
them.
And the police aren't umaddressing the issue either.
They're just they're supposed toinvestigate, and then in most
cases, they're not caught worththe investigating it, right?
And so I think uh we're leftwith then what what are we gonna
do about this?
And I and our hope is that byhiding this, um, launching this
(42:12):
website and and sharing storiesand doing it um with intention
and through art, that we're ableto really um not just reach some
parts of folks, but get folks toum to also start um to be in
deep reflection about how thisis genuinely showing up in our
communities and what we can andcannot do.
(42:34):
I think for a long time we'vejust convinced ourselves that
there is nothing we can dounless the victim reports.
And I think we need to stopsaying that and really start
owning this issue of like if awoman dies in our community,
essentially we have all failedher, right?
And if we normalize this, we'recontinuing to fail women.
So what are we individually andcollectively doing to make sure
(42:58):
that we don't normalize this,right?
To make sure that we are askingthe questions, to make sure that
there are proper investigations,to make sure that there is
urgency and conversation killed,and it's not just I'm sorry for
this family, you know, singingprayers and thoughts.
Like that is not helping us endgender violence or end femicide.
SPEAKER_00 (43:20):
Vanessa, thank you so much for all of your work
you're doing, your dedication,your perseverance to keep that
light alive and be that voicefor so many individuals who are
either choosing to be silent orfeeling that they're they have
to be silent, that they have noother choice but to be silent.
Your work that you're doing isamazing.
(43:41):
And I would love to keep updatedwith how you guys are doing.
Um, and you know, thank you somuch for your time and sharing a
little bit of an insight intoyour sister um with all of us.
And I really appreciate that.
I know it's difficult to talkabout, um, but she sounds like
(44:01):
she was a beautiful person, andI'm uh honored that you shared
her with us.
All right, thank you guys somuch.
Thank you again, Vanessa andIneth, for joining me today, and
thank you, warriors, forlistening.
I've included the links Vanessawas referring to as well as her
(44:22):
one in three profile in the shownotes.
I will be back next week withanother episode for you.
Until then, stay strong, andwherever you are in your
journey, always remember you arenot alone.
Find more information, registeras a guest, or leave a review by
(44:43):
going to the website one inthreepodcast.com.
That's the number one, I and thenumber three podcast.com.
Follow one in three onInstagram, Facebook, and Twitter
at one and three podcast.
To help me out, please rememberto rate review and subscribe.
One in three is a.5 Pinoyproduction.
Music written and performed byTim Crow.
Hi, Warriors.
Welcome to One and Three.
I'm your host, Ingrid.
As I've shared over the last fewepisodes, this year's Domestic
Violence Awareness Month carriestwo powerful themes with
Survivors Always and EveryoneKnows Someone.
Today's episode reflects both.
I'm honored to welcome Vanessaand Yannet, who will share the
(00:23):
advocacy work of Vivan LasAutonomas and the story of
Yannet's sister, Lisbeth.
Let's get started.
Hi, ladies.
Thank you so much for joining metoday.
How are you?
unknown (00:37):
Good.
SPEAKER_02 (00:38):
How are you?
SPEAKER_00 (00:39):
Good, thanks.
Um, before we get into ourconversation, do you mind just
giving a little bit of abackground on yourselves just so
the listeners get to know yousome?
SPEAKER_03 (00:50):
My name is Vanessa Sarah.
Um, I'm a moving boardimmigrant, based in advocate.
Uh, I'm a community organizerand advocate.
Um, I founded by NASA Alabama,um, which is an organization
that supports and organizesfamilies impacted by femicide,
(01:13):
as well as supporting survivors,victims of domestic and sexual
violence.
SPEAKER_00 (01:19):
Okay.
Do you want to talk about alittle bit more about your
organization?
And I mean, you you mentionedalready what it does, but and
I'm sure most people understandwhat femicide is, but just to
bring everybody up to speed sowe're all on the same page.
SPEAKER_03 (01:35):
Of course, no, I usually have the question.
I actually found it in my workthat most people don't know what
femicide is, both in English andin Spanish.
Um, femicide is the intentionalkilling of a woman because of
her gender.
Um and, you know, I came intothis word and bringing awareness
(01:56):
about feminicide because of whathappened to Easter and her
killing in 2020.
Um it was at a time where Imyself had been years um of the
judicial system as a survivor ofsexual abuse and that
(02:16):
experience.
And then I heard about Lisa thatshe had listed for some time and
that she was then found.
Um and there was no communityorganizing around the time,
despite that there are a lot ofa little bit like advocacy
groups in the area, but therewas no focus to uh gender
(02:41):
violence, um, and there was nouh really advocacy around what
happens when missing when womenare missing in our community, or
what happens when women areemerging in our community
because of domestic violence,because of the part of violence.
Um and so, you know, we've gotmessaged over not started that
(03:05):
work started really um inresponse to uh the need for
these best family at the time,um, who was looking for
community and support tonavigate something that was so
unexpected and traumatic andthat um as a community, right,
we hadn't yet known how to howto come together uh in this way,
(03:29):
right?
How to break from this idea thatuh domestic violence happens to
just one person and it's anisolated issue, um, and to look
at really how is this acommunity issue?
Um, how are we failed to respondto this, um, right?
And who are the entities thatare failing to respond, right?
(03:50):
And in Miss Bett's case, um shewas living in a town in Captain
that was predominantly white,um, and uh predominantly a lot
of Italian families.
Um, it was not a very welcominguh community to immigrants.
Um, in fact, it had the historyof actually the police being
(04:13):
very violent and racist towardsthe immigrants.
Um, and there was like the thethere was a whole FBI
investigation.
Um and so it, you know, whenwhen Lee Smith was missing and
when everything was happening,it was no surprise that folks in
East Haven were not talkingabout it, were acting as if it
(04:36):
didn't matter yet in this smalllittle town that I grew up in
when I moved to Connecticut, um,I know that if it had been a
white woman that had gonemissing, a young white mother,
27 years old, Libany Smith, um,I know it would have been a talk
of the town.
And um, it was very hurtful tome, um, you know, as an imminent
(05:00):
ranking lifter for someone tofeel like so if something
happens to us, no one cares, noone asks questions, no one says
anything.
Um and so our work began both intrying to uh raise awareness
within the community, but alsocalling out um the town
officials, the mayor, the policedepartment, you know, why aren't
(05:22):
they doing more?
You know, why aren't they doingmore?
Because frankly, from from ourend, you know, the family did so
much, Yagi did so much, thesister did so much.
Um, and the justice that we havegotten today for these baiths,
everything that we've gotten forthese baths has really been
because of the family and andtheir willingness to fight for
(05:43):
justice and to not give up andto make sure that you know her
story is known and it doesn'tjust end uh i in this in the
violent way that her life wastaken, but that there's really
more to her story than that.
Um so I think that you know whenyou when you walk with families
(06:04):
through this journey that that'sbeen more than four years, um,
you know, you you learn so muchnot just about what things could
have been done, how we as acommunity could intervene to
stop this.
Um, but you learn so much tooabout how these systems are
failing uh women, whether theyreport or not, right?
(06:24):
It's it's really not about us orthis burden that is placed on
victims to um to do everythingin order to prevent our deaths.
It's just too much.
SPEAKER_00 (06:34):
So before we get into Lisbeth's uh story in a
little bit more detail, I knowin that case you guys jumped
right in and you were helpingwith the investigation and all
of that.
Is there anything else that yourorganization does besides
helping with uh findinginformation and seeking justice?
SPEAKER_03 (06:53):
Yeah, so we help families navigate um the legal
system, right?
Um, when it both from, you know,before police make an arrest,
pushing police to make anarrest, right, to move on
something when an arrest ismade, navigate the whole process
pre-trial to trial.
Um, outside of that, too, youknow, we do um community
organizing, we've done campaignsto specifically raise awareness
(07:14):
in cases of feminicide, like inthe space case, also in the case
of Roya Bohamali, who's anAfghan Muslim woman who was
murdered, and her case has, youknow, not been properly
investigated by police.
Um, and so we do a lot of umcultural and artistic events in
the community, um, vigils andart festivals, all that are
(07:36):
really dedicated to not justraising awareness about domestic
violence, about femicide, aboutsexual violence, but also really
um trying to make a shift, youknow, in our in our culture, in
our society, as far as how weunderstand these issues and how
uh we understand what we're ableto do about it, right?
(07:56):
Because many of us, even when wegrieve for the loss of a woman,
we we still see it as somethinglike, well, I what could I have
done, right?
If she didn't report, if shedidn't do this, right?
And in reality, there's so manythings that we as a community
can be doing to help make thatthat shift in society, and so
(08:17):
that the burden isn't always onthe victims, because a lot of
the time victims are alreadydoing a lot to get themselves
out of these situations.
And I just don't think thatwe're meeting where we need to
be.
And their best, right, provesthat.
And then when we're not takingthe time to really stop and
(08:38):
process what what led to thevictims, right?
What was what happened to reallyunpack that, um, then we're
losing this opportunity, right?
That is to learn from that andto really prevent it in a real
way.
Um, because we say that domesticviolence is preventable and we
know that it is, and yet when ithappens, we almost accept that
(09:00):
it's it it just it just sort ofhappens in our communities,
right?
SPEAKER_00 (09:05):
Yeah, definitely.
Uh and I I so appreciate whatyour organization is doing
because you know, victims, evenif they survive, they're still
very much victimized, and it'sreally difficult for them to
seek justice on their own.
And the perpetrators or theabusers are typically very uh
(09:27):
removed from any sort of uhempathy or accountability of
what they've done.
So they actually can go in andbe calm and collected and look
like they're the ones who arenot the crazy one.
The victim a lot of the timeslooks like they are the crazy
individual because they're soemotional from the abuse that
(09:48):
they've been experiencing.
So I really appreciate the workthat you guys are doing with the
victims and and families andseeking justice.
Um, I know in this case, youhadn't just started your
organization, right?
SPEAKER_03 (10:01):
Like, so how did you a collective of girls?
We were just young.
Um, we were all around Yanni'sage, and um we had done you know
years of organizing around theimmigrant community, and so we
had that experience.
Um and we had just come up likeum doing a lot of work to
(10:27):
support independently victims ofum domestic and sexual violence,
we're doing correctness withfundraisers, um, getting
emergent to five, getting um youknow, working to take the hotel,
we're doing that at a smallscale.
Um, but then you know, I'm gonnado it.
So it was like there's someoneworking back.
(10:52):
And I think the fact that it wassome point on the door that it's
part of this police, I don'tknow what that was a gap in of
like no one's actuallyresponding to gender violence
after advocacy groups, notorganized groups, right?
We don't we don't have a placefor families to go to when it's
(11:15):
happy other than the police.
But what do you do when thepolice aren't responding, right?
What do you do when the policeare believing the lives of the
perpetrator?
What do you do when you knowthey're violent to properly,
right?
And this idea that, oh, womenjust kick off, women just
disappear, women just abandontheir families, right?
What do you do when police areso violent and you know fail to
(11:40):
respond with urgency to thedepths of black family women so
much, right?
And there's no community groupthat is that is there to fill
that need, right?
And so we started as a group ofyoung women who just really
wanted to be there for youngmen, um, who also had sisters
and could imagine what thiswould be like if we got you know
(12:04):
our sister went listening andyou know we would have turned to
each other.
And so that's kind of how westarted, and um, frankly, like
Yankee's courage and her, youknow, that fire of just like
that that's inside you that Ithink that it she really was
(12:26):
away for us, you know.
We were right there behind her,and we had her her side, her
back, the front, but it was itwas really her um showing us
like what do you do when yoursister's missing, you know, and
she went in and she did a lot ofthe groundwork before um we got
connected with her.
And I think a lot of our workwas sort of helping also
(12:48):
navigate with the media becausethey weren't covering this issue
and what does it look like whenthey do start to cover this
issue, but how to do it in asensitive way, in a way that
honors the victim's life, right?
Not just that moment of deathand how she was found, because
you know, it it was very violentand very brutal.
Um, though not just the way inwhich she was killed, but the
(13:09):
aftermath of it too.
Um, and and and the way that youknow he tried to discard her
body.
That was another form ofviolence, that was another way
of killing her again, you know.
So I think that um it, you know,really we we stand because you
know Yami's experience herfamily taught us that, you know,
(13:30):
so many families are left reallyalone when they're when their
loved one who is a woman iskilled, who, you know, when
police say a woman quote isfound dead, there's really a lot
more to that.
And often because of the way themedia portrays it, which is
similar to the way policeportray it, which is just women
found dead, we don't askquestions and we think that it's
(13:52):
that maybe they die.
We just like want to assume theydie as a non-violent way, but
that's usually not the case, youknow, when a woman is found
dead.
Um, you know, that doesn't justcoincidentally happen.
You know, we're not just birdsdropping from the sky.
Um, especially when they'refound in their homes, you know,
like women were killedviolently.
Um, and I think that it's it'svery harmful the way that you
(14:17):
know the media continues andpolice um to sort of minimize um
this issue of femicide, right?
Of just like, oh, domesticviolence is an isolated issue
when it's not, and we see ithappening across our
communities, um, across race,across um language, across
economic status, acrosseverything, you know.
SPEAKER_00 (14:39):
Yeah, and so I I you and I talked before, and I said
I had heard the story on uhanother podcast.
And as I was listening, I wasjust infuriated with hearing how
much of the investigative workwas done by the family.
And I just uh I thought that wasnot fair, but of course the part
(14:59):
that was sticking out to me wasdomestic violence and the
frustration that I had with alot of domestic violence cases,
is where it's it's just easierto believe the perpetrator than
to really dig into it.
Uh for those listeners who arenot familiar with the story, do
you guys mind sharing a littlebit as much as you want in
(15:20):
whatever detail as far as whathappened?
SPEAKER_03 (15:23):
My name is Tatan, and I think at the time uh with
her boyfriend Jonathan, and hewas also the father of her
child.
And you know, what we came tofind out, you know, was that
(15:45):
Jonathan uh killed these babe umin the early dollars of her
birthday.
Um he buried her body uh behinddumpsters uh in a Brantford
restaurant called La Michael'srestaurant, uh an Italian
(16:07):
restaurant that he used to workat.
Um he knew that the restaurantwould be shut by the holidays,
and he used that to hisadvantage to bury her body
there.
Um Lizbeth was missing uh fordays, um, and that's sort of how
(16:39):
uh it all started because youknow I think as a sister, Yanni
knew like there was somethingwrong, and um her sister who was
a dedicated living mother wouldnot just abandon her child under
any circumstance, and so umthings just weren't adding up.
(16:59):
Um, but Jonathan had uh a stringof lies um and deceptions and uh
really tried to manipulate thefamily into believing um that
she she abandoned him and theirchild and um you know fed the
(17:20):
same lies to police um to getpolice to not look for her, um,
even though the family wasreporting her missing.
SPEAKER_00 (17:33):
When he finally went to trial, um I think one of the
things that uh stuck out to mewas his ultimate sentence and
how even that was unfair and itwas not really a form of justice
because he was able to accept aa plea deal.
So even as he's being tried forthis crime, um he still was able
(18:01):
to almost control or navigatewhat his final outcome was.
And from what I understand, youguys were frustrated with that
as well.
SPEAKER_03 (18:12):
Yeah, yeah, I think it was very um, I think,
disrespectful um overall, notjust to his best memory, but I
think to the family who's youknow carried this pain for
years, and even though trialwould have been its its own
painful process, um, that's aright that they have to choose.
(18:37):
Um, if if they prefer that andtaking those risks to get closer
to what feels like justice, youknow.
And I, you know, I think thestate spends so much time always
telling families that you knowthere's so much a possibility of
losing with jurors, you neverknow.
And even sometimes they haveevidence and they have video
(18:59):
footage, and the juror stillends up bringing down the
charges from you know frommurder to attempted
manslaughter, and so there'salways this constant um talk and
pressure from the state thatlike you know it's not worth
going to to trial, there's toomany um risks, we don't have
(19:22):
enough uh in terms of evidence,and it's frustrating to hear
that because if they don't haveenough evidence, that's that's
the police to wake, you know,that's not in the family.
And um, you know, you wouldthink after everything, and even
the fact that FBI comes involvedat some point, you would think
(19:43):
that um there would be moreevidence.
Um and so to hear that even whenyou have a family that's doing
everything going above andbeyond, because right, police uh
when police don't react withurgency, right, and they fail to
collect evidence in due time,right?
Whether it's footage or whetherit's whatever, um, you know,
(20:05):
that has a lasting impact.
And you know, when police give,when police perform differently
in certain cases in certaininvestigations, right, because
of white women or because of animmigrant woman or whatever,
that has a lasting impact,right?
And so the state felt positive,they felt like they didn't have
enough um to go to trial.
(20:28):
And for us, it was just like itit's not, you know, what when
you ask a family what is theamount of years that would feel
right, there is no number.
Um, when you ask a family whatis it about the charges, it's
both a yes and a no.
Because, you know, for beinghonest, at the end of the day,
(20:52):
all he was charged with wasmurder, but he didn't just kill
her.
You know, it's the way hedisposed of her body.
There are charges for that whenyou tamper with elements, when
you move a body.
There's so man, there was um achild who was present um when
this happened.
And whether she saw it or not,she was with in the home.
You know, there are risks ofinjury to a minor charges that
(21:14):
could have been applied, butthat wasn't there.
So if we're talking aboutcharges, there's yes, there's a
list of charges that could havegone on, right?
Um, strangulation, right?
She was strangled to death.
We she could have been chargedfor that.
And when there were plea dealsthat were discussed in the
process, right, that was one ofit.
Like they they at one point thestate wanted to reduce the
(21:36):
murder charge and offer him, ifhe was willing to do more years,
reduce it to manslaughter andwith strangulation, and I think
with a tampering evidencecharge.
It was like three chargecombination that would result in
like 20, 50, 35 years, and theywould sort of let the judge
(21:58):
decide what the what the yearswould be between that range.
And you know, that that was a nofor a definite no because even
though it had the stimulationfrom the other stuff, it was
like he had accidentallymurdered her.
There was this there was nothingaccidental about this.
This was all premeditated.
(22:20):
And to to let him off the hookin that way is is is very
insulting to her memory, and towhat actually happened, you
know.
At the end of the day, Lee Smithhas a daughter who's gonna grow
up to want to know the truth anddeserves to know the truth,
right?
And and those journeys is not areflection of what really
(22:40):
happened, you know, and itdoesn't honor Beast, it doesn't
honor her story, it doesn'thonor her loved ones who have
fought so hard for truth andjustice, right?
Um, so we pushed back heavily onthat, and you know, I think it
got to a point where Jonathanstarted to understand that the
(23:02):
family was willing to go totrial, um, if it meant making
sure that we we had a murdercharge on the table.
And you know, I think thatscared him.
And I think that's why lastminute he sort of um and you
said at the end of the day, itwas still on his terms.
He always made things on histerms, and the state was always
(23:24):
it felt like giving into histerms and conditions of what
he's willing.
It was always he's not willingto do more than 20.
That was always clear to us.
He's not willing to do more than20.
I was like, I don't care.
Did he just did he make that upwhen he killed her?
Like, I don't understand, youknow, what gives him the right.
Um, but it was it it was reallyfar right, and you know, I think
(23:47):
last night he ends up decidinghe would stick with the writer
charge, um, but only if he didthe minimum amount of years,
which was 25.
He wasn't going to risk doing upto 60.
And, you know, once the stateheard that they were like,
great, it's a plea murder, welove it.
We'll take it.
And it was enough for them.
(24:08):
And it's hard to fight the stateand to expect them to do well in
a trial when they already feellike they have enough um
justice, right?
Even if that's not enough forthe family.
Um, how do you the state isn'tadvocating for you, right?
Like victims of femicide andtheir loved ones don't have an
(24:31):
attorney, don't have someonewho's representing their
interests.
The state is representing thestate's interests, and while,
yes, Lisbon is the victim, youknow, we don't spend enough
talking, enough time talkingabout, you know, the victims'
rights and their loved ones'rights in that way.
Um, and so it very much feelslike these cases sort of
revolver with the perpetratorwith the killers willing to
(24:55):
acknowledge what they're willingto do.
Um and it's hard because a lotof the time they don't have
resources.
Um, and resources takes lesslike very many, many forms, has
many forms, right?
It's not just financialresources, it's also the support
that you have from family andfriends.
Like that's a huge, hugeresource that a lot of the
(25:18):
victims don't have, thatfamilies in tactic by femicide
don't have.
They're grieving, right?
They're not here building theirnetwork and getting all their
alliances, like they're grievingand they're trying to navigate a
system while just whilegrieving.
And so I think that you know,visas have such a vantage point,
and the system is in many waysset up for them to support them,
(25:42):
not to support the families orthe victims.
Um, and so you know, the termswere sort of set by him, and the
state felt like it was enough,and so families, I feel like,
are just kind of shuffled alongthe process.
Um and it's very grateful.
And I think that um, especiallywhen you have families that are
(26:05):
just pouring into giving so muchto make sure that there is
justice.
Um, I don't I don't think youknow the state has the right to
give up on bad links or to or tobring less to the table, you
know, and and I understand thatjuries and jurors help how
complicated all of that is.
Um, but that is also why we dothat, you know, working in the
(26:25):
community, that cultural work.
Because yeah, we have to get toa point where we're
understanding these issues whereit's not about the evidence.
How much evidence do I have?
Can I see the footage of how hedid this and why he did this?
Like if we're not always gonnahave all of that evidence, but
we have enough information,data, and research about
(26:46):
domestic violence, about partnerviolence, about all this results
in um the deaths of women.
And so I think we need to stopturning away from it, right?
And when you see the theconnections, like the dump, we
need to make those connections.
Like a lot of times we don'tidentify the women who have been
killed as victims of domesticviolence.
(27:06):
Or if we do, it's not until muchlater, you know, and and that's
that's harmful for communitiesbecause it is not helping us
understand like how often it ishappening and how real a public
issue is within our communities.
SPEAKER_00 (27:21):
You are so right on so many levels of what you just
said.
Um, you know, the statistics areoff and the statistics matter
because when you have the theappropriate statistics, that's
what pushes for change and getsthe attention of lawmakers and
the legal system as far as okay,these statistics look really
bad, we need to do somethingabout it now.
(27:43):
Um the judicial system a lot oftimes does look at what their
idea of justice is, and they dooften forget what justice means
to family and to victims.
And victims often turn into acase.
And I don't I don't want that tohappen with Lise Beth.
(28:05):
She was a person.
So I would love for you guys totalk about her.
Let let us know the kind ofperson she was, the kind of mom,
the kind of sister that she was,and let's just talk about her as
a person.
So we because we all need toremember that victims, it's not
just a tragic story, it's aperson.
SPEAKER_02 (28:32):
Um I don't remember um it's probably 15, and it was
probably like 12, 13, 12.
So yeah, like that, like that.
(29:07):
Um we're gloved and all that,but she did her best.
(29:27):
I know she did.
And when she became a mother.
She surprised me on horn becauseshe became kind of like that
mother that she never never hadin her life.
So she was very um very caring.
As she um she was bornpremature, she was about six,
(29:52):
seven months.
So um, for her to become amother as well was very, very
difficult.
unknown (29:59):
Um
SPEAKER_00 (31:03):
For those of us who never had the opportunity to
meet her, is there anything thatyou would want us to
specifically know about her?
SPEAKER_02 (31:14):
I wanted to talk to the time for people that she's
lovely.
And that's all I just want tosay.
She'll have a person that willbother anyone.
She'll just like go back towork.
(31:36):
She'll come back to her family.
Trying to be with the levels aswell, which is very funny and
very good as well.
(31:59):
Like I said, you can't bother.
No at least like, oh, it's gonnause that.
Just emotional secretity.
Or something too.
Yeah, for her own.
But um in my opinion, she justdidn't have a lot too too left.
(32:26):
Yeah.
I don't I don't think he was thelove of her life.
I think she got that.
They met when they were veryyoung and they went.
She met when she was in highschool, so and they're more like
(32:50):
ten years or so, so the personthat was great.
(33:17):
You know, come into a newcountry where you're not the
language, you're not the peopleyou already know your neighbors.
Kind of like the couple friendsthat you have, you just have to
stick to.
It's much easier than homesometimes.
(33:41):
Also for us to like open upabout this area.
It's kinda like a whole lot ofit.
You know, from where we comefrom.
You know, we know the neighbors,we know who's around, and it's
(34:04):
it's it's just different inculture, it's completely
different in here, but it's justso that you have to hide, you
know, before you pretend likeyou're not there.
Um but yeah, it's it's it's justthe fear of putting all those
(34:29):
things out there too.
They were lucky in so manyaspects, um It's unfortunately
(34:54):
that this happened.
Um things have happened to a lotof women.
Um we've seen this a lot as wellin Mexico, but I know so because
I have to be the none that talksabout it.
Um but it it affects you themost when it's what's happened
to someone and you love someoneyou can.
(35:16):
So we start seeing a bigpicture, but it's just not only
one little thing.
It's beyond that.
It's a lot of things going on.
It's all starts with what thefamily hat.
(35:37):
It all starts with the you knowthe love you receive.
SPEAKER_00 (35:41):
Um she sounds like an amazing woman.
Amazing mom, maybe amazingsister.
Um Vanessa, if people want tolearn more about Vivan Les
Autonomous, um how do they howdo they get in touch?
SPEAKER_03 (36:00):
Um can follow our Instagram page, um Vivan Les
Autonomous, uh, which um inEnglish that means um long link
autonomous women.
Um and so we you know we believewomen have autonomy in terms of
you know the lifestyle they wantto live, who they want to love,
um, how they want to evolve, youknow.
(36:22):
I think that often what we'reseeing is that the way women are
current, often by people thatlove them because of who we are
and how we choose to live ourlives free um in autonomous way.
And um yeah, so we we do a lotof work in the community to
raise awareness around not justfemicide um but gendered
(36:43):
violence and all the ways itshows up.
Um so you can follow ourInstagram page.
Um, we have a link treeconnected out there, and we
don't have a website yet, but umwe are working um next year to
launch um Connecticut's firstfemicide website.
Um, and so we're really excitedabout that.
It's been um really a projectthat I've been working on since
(37:07):
the spent death.
Um I really wanted to understandhow else this was showing up in
our communities.
I wanted to understand how manywomen were missing and have been
murdered and what was funny withtheir stories and their cases.
And so since 2020, I've beentracking um the deaths of women
(37:28):
across Connecticut, allgender-related killings.
And so our goal is to launch awebsite next year.
Um, I it won't have all of ityet because I think we've
actually have quite a lot ofdatabase, um, which is it's
really sad that it's that many,but I think um we're really
excited for our initial launchbecause um we are not just
(37:54):
sharing um femicides acrossConnecticut as a form of data.
It really is more of an artisticproject.
It is really um a labor of love.
Um, and I think that you knowit's both a way to show elected
officials across our state thatthis is a serious issue that
(38:17):
it's actually not beingaddressed by the current
institutions and agencies thatare supposed to be addressing
this or they think that theyare, right?
Um and so I think it's gonnashow um the real uh of the
issue, you know, how prevalentis femicide.
Um, and frankly, our numbers umare more and different than the
(38:41):
numbers that um domesticviolence agencies are reporting
as far as fate families umbecause of domestic violence,
right?
And so what does it mean whenagencies are only counting
certain deaths, right?
And what does it look like whenwe actually have a higher number
of women in our state that arebeing killed because of gender
(39:03):
violence than what we thinkthere is.
Um, and I think that, you know,for us, it's really important
for folks to also understand uhwho these women were, right?
And that they had a story andthat they were someone, and that
um the the loss of of theirlife, of their light, um has a
(39:24):
tremendous impact and not justfor their loved ones, but um for
community members as well.
Um, you know, I I have seen umhow this devastates um beyond
family members.
And um I think you know it'sit's way past time that we don't
(39:44):
not just create the resourcesfor these families, but also
create a space that honors allof these victims and that helps
these families connect with oneanother and really feel like
they're not isolated in thistype of violence and this type
of grief and loss, um, thatunfortunately it's happening
form that we think it is.
(40:05):
Um, but that if we all, right,what would it look like if we
all came together and demandedthat our elected officials
really prioritizes, right?
Like what would it look like ifwe um the municipal level
started to issue that or you maybe aware of the fact that um
femicide is a public healthissue, that this is a crisis
(40:26):
that we're in, right?
What would it look like if ourlocal government started to look
and respond to it as that?
Um but we don't even have that.
Um we don't that's not aconversation we're having on a
local or state level, despite umnumerous deaths of women, you
know.
And and it's not it's immigrantwomen, it's black women, it's
white women, it's everyone.
(40:47):
And the the response has stillalways been the same.
Police investigate, you know,we'll take the trial, maybe,
maybe not.
There's a conviction, but that'sit.
There's nothing else other thanyou know funding domestic
violence agencies, which theyhave stated, they don't do
anything about the fact that awoman is killed because of
(41:08):
domestic violence, right?
Their job, their scope of theirwork goes up, you know, is as
far as women are alive.
But if they die or when theydie, that is that is not part of
their responsibilities or theirwork that they have to do.
They don't have to follow up,they don't have to look into
why, they don't have to reportto the state, you know, how how
they're going to change the whatthey're doing, their approach,
(41:30):
or nothing.
It doesn't require anything,even if the victim was being
serviced by that agency.
There is nothing they have to doother than report this victim
died because of domesticviolence.
That's it.
And, you know, that's that's notgetting us anywhere, right?
Especially when we have electedofficials that think these these
are the agencies that areresponding to their deaths, or
(41:50):
not, they're just reportingthem, they're not responding to
them.
And the police aren't umaddressing the issue either.
They're just they're supposed toinvestigate, and then in most
cases, they're not caught worththe investigating it, right?
And so I think uh we're leftwith then what what are we gonna
do about this?
And I and our hope is that byhiding this, um, launching this
(42:12):
website and and sharing storiesand doing it um with intention
and through art, that we're ableto really um not just reach some
parts of folks, but get folks toum to also start um to be in
deep reflection about how thisis genuinely showing up in our
communities and what we can andcannot do.
(42:34):
I think for a long time we'vejust convinced ourselves that
there is nothing we can dounless the victim reports.
And I think we need to stopsaying that and really start
owning this issue of like if awoman dies in our community,
essentially we have all failedher, right?
And if we normalize this, we'recontinuing to fail women.
So what are we individually andcollectively doing to make sure
(42:58):
that we don't normalize this,right?
To make sure that we are askingthe questions, to make sure that
there are proper investigations,to make sure that there is
urgency and conversation killed,and it's not just I'm sorry for
this family, you know, singingprayers and thoughts.
Like that is not helping us endgender violence or end femicide.
SPEAKER_00 (43:20):
Vanessa, thank you so much for all of your work
you're doing, your dedication,your perseverance to keep that
light alive and be that voicefor so many individuals who are
either choosing to be silent orfeeling that they're they have
to be silent, that they have noother choice but to be silent.
Your work that you're doing isamazing.
(43:41):
And I would love to keep updatedwith how you guys are doing.
Um, and you know, thank you somuch for your time and sharing a
little bit of an insight intoyour sister um with all of us.
And I really appreciate that.
I know it's difficult to talkabout, um, but she sounds like
(44:01):
she was a beautiful person, andI'm uh honored that you shared
her with us.
All right, thank you guys somuch.
Thank you again, Vanessa andIneth, for joining me today, and
thank you, warriors, forlistening.
I've included the links Vanessawas referring to as well as her
(44:22):
one in three profile in the shownotes.
I will be back next week withanother episode for you.
Until then, stay strong, andwherever you are in your
journey, always remember you arenot alone.
Find more information, registeras a guest, or leave a review by
(44:43):
going to the website one inthreepodcast.com.
That's the number one, I and thenumber three podcast.com.
Follow one in three onInstagram, Facebook, and Twitter
at one and three podcast.
To help me out, please rememberto rate review and subscribe.
One in three is a.5 Pinoyproduction.
Music written and performed byTim Crow.
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