Podcast Episode #185 - Authentically You

Welcome back, you beautiful, beautifully cluttered souls, to 'I AM' – the podcast that tackles the messy bits of life with a side of mindful mischief. Today, Find the Freedom to Be You (Authentically You) ...watch this episode on YouTube

“One of the greatest regrets in life is being what others would want you to be, rather than being yourself.”―Shannon L. Alder

I discovered that some people may not necessarily be “people pleasers”, but they still don’t live with self-integrity…you know not living in accordance with one's priorities, desires and values. That could be because they don’t truly know themselves or maybe don’t want to ruffle any feathers. Therefore, they feel it’s safer to live by societal expectations and beliefs rather than their true beliefs.

There’s also the trap of having an overly busy lifestyle that many people embark on with - little time to ask themselves “what do I really want?” or “what makes me happy?” I get it. I've spent my lifetime being a people pleaser, so when I broke the cycle I decided to dedicate the last 12 years to building a business that guides and supports individuals in living an authentic and fulfilling life.

But first, why does authenticity even matter? Well, it’s way easier being yourself than putting so much effort and energy into people pleasing for others.

The energy it requires to continuously analyze situations and people so you can respond “appropriately” is insane!!! When someone is authentic, we look at them and feel their honesty, confidence and most likely wish we could do the same. Actually, don’t you feel great being around someone who is authentic? It gives you the permission to be authentic too - feeling the freedom to be you. There are so many benefits to being authentic – respect from others, greater trust, solid and meaningful relationships, you can self-actualize, and simply be at your best!

If you’re on the “becoming my authentic self” journey, read on to understand the four pillars to being your authentic self. Essentially a roadmap on how to achieve (and maintain) being authentic – i.e. NO MORE PEOPLE PLEASING, oh, and some questions to support you on this journey.

In the midst of our busy lives, it's essential to carve out time for self-care and reconnect with our authentic selves. One powerful way to achieve this is through engaging in hobbies. Hobbies not only provide a welcome escape from the demands of daily life but also serve as a means to nurture and express our individuality

“As my awareness increases, my control over my own being increases.” – William Schutz

Four Pillars

No.1 Self-Awareness

• Who are you having a difficult time being yourself with? Why do you think that is?
• When do you catch yourself shrinking and almost disappearing? What is the reason for that?
• When are you stressed out? Who are you with? Why is that?
• Who do you have a hard time saying no to, but would like to? What are you afraid of? So what?
• In what area of your life do you feel lacks authenticity? I.e. Where do you feel you might be living out of integrity?

"Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom."–Aristotle.

No.2 Self-Discovery

• When thinking about your personality traits, do you think you are funny, shy, intelligent, introverted, secretly flamboyant, predictable, giving, athletic, direct, methodical? How would you describe yourself?
• Did you discover negative traits you might have? Like selfishness, blunt, lazy, compulsive, false, selfish, gullible, vindictive, naive, or moody? Do you always express those traits?
• What do you love to do? What do you despise? What are your dreams and aspirations?
• What are your biggest challenges lately and what are you doing about it?
• What are 25 things that make you smile?

“What self-acceptance does is open up more possibilities of succeeding because you aren’t fighting yourself along the way.” – Shannon Ables

No.3 Self-Acceptance

Part of self-acceptance is also realizing that whatever you did in that moment (good or bad), is simply what you did in that moment, and what you were capable of doing in that moment. When you are able to see that truth, self-judgment disappears and self-love comes in! In the moment, you did the best you could. Instead of self-judgment, learn and move on.

Self-acceptance is also the gateway to accepting others and their life path. Honestly, this is where we can begin practicing “Christ Consciousness” on earth. Becoming a vess