Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Chapter 9 Sandrix at the Blessings of Habilah
(00:16):
You peer through the darkness, you see another large cavern.
This is a very big underground cavern. We're talking a dome type shape that is a radius of 60 yards.
It's huge. You can see these pillars of stalagmites all around, just a huge pile of sand.
(00:40):
Just in the center as you approach and as you enter the clam chill closes.
It's lit by this ambient purplish green light to light up the whole arena.
And yeah, you're there.
He said arena. I'm not seeing much of an arena, but now that you know.
All right. So now as opposed to we were fighting a dragon.
(01:01):
Is it dark? It's lit. It's very lit.
There's a disco ball.
As you look upon this arena and this large pile of sand, it starts to whip up with wind and form around itself and do like a cyclone.
And then you see the form of this dragon built of sand and sea glass spread its wings and stand upon this pile.
(01:28):
Very large dragon, say a wingspan of about 30 yards.
Damn, damn. Shinra didn't think you guys were going to come in there for a second.
You know, that is the most bitchy thing I've ever seen.
Appreciate it. I'm thinking we should probably head back out now.
Do you want to like that's not an option anymore.
(01:50):
Do you want to drink with us? We're drinking.
What kind of wine is that? Red.
I only like white roll initiatives.
I was hoping like in the next section, I could just like use the keg as like a fucking beer bomb for him.
(02:11):
I think every time I roll initiative, I get a better initiative than the last time.
I'm going up by one every time. 16.
Oh, 16 for Bernard.
That's probably first. Anyone got higher than 16? Yeah.
No, I got a 15 though.
10. Argon.
10. Who has higher decks?
(02:34):
Two. Two. Who got a higher dragon dive?
Five. One.
Okay, there we go. Geez.
Okay, so as you guys are here, this dragon takes up a majority of the center.
You are about 20 yards away at this all in the same spot at the close clamshell at the edge of the circle.
(02:55):
There are various amounts of stalagmites and like water pools around.
And the cavern goes up pretty damn high. You can't really see the ceiling.
Is anyone excited for this?
No, I was kind of, you know, when I struck out with the mermaid, I was happy that I wouldn't have sand everywhere.
You actually hit on the mermaid.
(03:16):
Yeah, dude. Props.
I like this guy. What's your name?
Sandrix.
Sandrix? Yes.
Like Rick Sand or?
Rick's. R-I-X.
Rick's your last name?
My first name.
First name.
So Rick Sand.
Oh, I like this guy.
(03:37):
Do we really have to fight you, man?
Well, yeah, you can't get through.
Why would we just want to chill here with you?
Well, I'm going to get hungry.
Oh, well, eventually.
What do you eat?
Whatever is stupid enough to come in here.
I'm scared.
I think that's us.
Well, at this point, unfortunately, yeah.
(03:59):
So what?
Is there any other dragons out there besides just, you know, maids out of sand?
I mean, there's probably a lot, but I don't know. I haven't met them. We don't hang out anymore.
Oh, man, I'm sorry.
Everyone gets too pushy.
You know?
Like these are my, like, sacred god items, so nobody else can have them.
Yeah, I don't want them, dude.
Good. Well, now I'm going to get you guys.
(04:21):
Bernard, go ahead first.
I can't even.
I don't know what to do.
I don't get to be dragons.
I don't like I don't want to have, like, slay him or hurt or kill him because he's so fucking fun and cool.
A dragon made of fucking swirling sand.
(04:43):
Like, when have you ever get to find sea glass eyes and like gems throughout the wings?
This guy is too cool.
Yeah, so you're 20 yards away, Bernard.
Well, I'd like to go hide in one of those pools.
OK, you're going to go in the water.
Oh, yeah. Is that a bad idea?
(05:05):
I don't know. You tell me. Go for it.
Yeah, you can definitely. What's your movement speed?
13. Yeah, you can get to one.
One about 10 yards away.
You just dive into the water. Yeah, I roll stealth.
Go for it. Yeah.
17. Wow.
Yeah, you just hit from a dragon. Congratulations.
(05:27):
Wow. All right.
So, yeah, you do successfully jump in and hide in the pool.
That's my goal. Nice.
Morgana. Bernard just takes off.
Wait, where is he going?
I don't know.
Do you see him?
I don't. I don't know.
Those pools go pretty deep.
(05:50):
You know what? That's fine.
There's your snack now.
Can we just like chill? We can eat the gnome.
No. Oh, I have a feeling you guys want to touch my items.
I didn't know you had items.
I worked really hard to get those items.
Why wouldn't I take something that's yours?
It doesn't interest me.
Well, you came through the shell. Yeah.
So anyone that comes through the shell only wants the things.
(06:12):
I don't want them.
I just want to just move past and get out of here.
We'll see. That's near my items.
We'll just take your items and just move the entrance and just clean it up.
Now just walk past it.
That's a lot of work, man.
How much fucking shit do you have?
Don't worry about it. Stop looking at my horde.
Sorry.
What you got, Morgana?
(06:35):
Yeah, I'd like to flameless.
Okay. Are you in range or that you're going to have to move first?
I'm going we're 20 yards away.
I'll move 12 yards closer.
Okay.
And I have eight yard range.
Do it.
How hot is your fire?
Are you turning this dragon to glass as you're hitting them?
18 beats TN dots for stunt points.
(07:00):
Okay.
I'll make the acrobatics.
It's yeah.
Oh, yeah.
You have to beat a 14.
It's a 15.
Unfortunately.
That's five damage for the first and for the second is four damage.
Are you flying blastin?
Yeah.
(07:21):
Well, let me roll for the second save.
Oh, is that a separate?
Which fails the 10.
So roll your full damage on the second.
Five total of 10.
Yes.
Okay. And then I'd like to look back at the door and see if he saw me use my breath.
(07:42):
That was awesome.
Yeah.
You do the same kind of combo.
So like you're right.
Blast and then tie it in with your dragon breath.
So it's just a swirling dragon head and it goes up and just hits the dragon is.
Fuck dude.
That was a little warm.
That's what it was supposed to do.
So you kind of throw the vibe off here.
(08:05):
Yeah.
Honestly, you kind of interrupt it.
We're just have like a conversation.
Just breathe five.
I mean, it was fucking cool and I really liked it, but he was such a nice guy.
He's just, you know, protecting his shit.
Yeah. His space.
Trying to light myself on fire.
Is there a way we can like exit out trying to light you on fire?
She's got the hots for you.
Interesting.
(08:26):
Dragon on dragon action.
You might roll seduction.
That'll bring us to the dragon.
Yeah.
You wanted to go first on what you wanted to go before the dragon, didn't you?
There's no way in hell I would be able to.
Actually, I don't know if it was a good thing.
(08:47):
If he went before the dragon, he probably wouldn't have talked.
I probably wouldn't.
I'm just kidding.
You curse.
So at this point, he flaps his huge wings and flies up and gets over right in between Morgana and you two warriors.
And it's going to go ahead and use its breath weapon on you too.
Since you're standing next to each other still.
(09:08):
No.
So go ahead and do a.
Actually, I have to roll for this.
So let me see.
Since he's made of sand, does it like you can see you kind of build up all the way throughout his whole body like from his stomach or?
Yeah, it's just like kind of like cycles in a little cyclone.
And it's like we'll start those still out of sand blast.
(09:32):
But that is a 14 to hit.
You have to have some fucking hits no matter what.
So go ahead and make dexterity acrobatics tests.
Are you kidding me?
No.
12 plus two.
14.
Nine.
Both fail.
So you will take full damage.
(09:54):
It goes through armor.
No, no, no.
Yes, it is.
Fuck nine penetrating damage to each of you as you just get ripped through with sand.
That was cool.
But is this turn, which will take us to bar and you have this dragon bearing down on you.
(10:17):
So he's flapping his wings.
He's up.
He's up.
No, he landed and breathed on you guys.
So he's on the ground right in front of you.
Actually, breath does not have that much range.
Oh, shit.
OK.
Well, is he right up on me?
Actually, he'd be about four yards away.
I'm going to pull my weapon out.
I would say you already had your weapon out.
OK.
You came into this knowing you were going to fight.
(10:39):
Yeah, but then I kind of like pointed down and like talking to the guy.
All right.
I'll point back up and then I'll just activate Berserker and then I'll just fucking swing at him.
You want to charge?
Well, you have to charge.
Oh, OK.
Thank you.
Charge.
Charge gives you a plus one, right?
17.
Yeah, that's got some stunts.
(11:02):
Got some stunts.
And since this creature is too big, you cannot knock Brown, correct?
You would imagine not.
Got it.
You know what?
I'm going to do a mighty blow and I'm going to do a plus one for boost.
I'm going to do my last one for boost.
(11:23):
OK.
So if I roll stunts, I get an extra.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Go for it.
Roll some damage.
All right.
18, 19.
That's 20 damage.
He's just swinging.
He's run at it and swing into his leg and take out chunk of sand.
I'm sorry.
You're trying to kill us and I can't have that happen.
(11:45):
I mean, that's fair.
We are fighting.
I know, but you seem so cool.
That's OK.
I don't feel good about this.
No, it's fine.
Are you OK if I melt you down and make you into a weapon?
No, I'm not cool with that.
What happens if I put you as the Dragon Slayer?
I'll think about it.
OK, cool.
Argon, that's to you.
(12:06):
I am terrified of this thing.
Fucking hit him.
How far is he from me?
Four yards.
So you can do the same thing that Baron just did.
Charge this motherfucker.
Yeah, just go ahead and charge it.
OK.
Yeah.
Yeah.
OK.
Let's see, add a plus one to your attack roll.
That's 10 plus 11.
(12:31):
So 16.
You can use your minor attack during Berserker's.
A strange whisper in my head.
Oh, you minor attack to go into Berserker mode.
All right.
You want to Berserker first?
Yeah.
Perfect.
So that means you get a plus two damage on this.
Did you roll any stunts?
No.
OK.
Yeah.
So go ahead and roll your attack.
(12:52):
So your Halberd, I believe, is a plus five.
Well, your damage is 2d6 plus nine or some shit.
Yeah, 2d6 plus nine.
Plus two from Berserker.
So that's a one and a five, six.
Six plus 11.
(13:13):
17 damage.
Yes.
Oh my god.
Fuck you.
Take that.
Dude, holy crap.
That Halberd's sick.
Thanks, bro.
I can't wait to add it to my collection.
What?
Wait a minute.
Now you can't steal our stuff.
Well, when you guys are dead, obviously I'm going to keep it.
That's how I get more stuff.
(13:35):
You know, fair point.
Bernard, you're in the pool.
I'd like to look and see if there's a series of pools leading up to the magical stuff on
the wall.
Go ahead.
Roll perception C and underwater.
What's your constitution, by the way?
Two.
Oh, OK.
So you can hold your breath for three minutes.
Twelve rounds of combat.
(13:56):
Hey, means you can move.
Wow.
This old man's got some lungs still.
Yeah, perception C or searching.
Thirteen.
Yeah, these pools connect.
I love it.
All right.
I'd like to.
But you also see some of these piranhas in between each like so you can see the light
(14:24):
coming down from each like pool, like the six of them that are around.
And they're also like fish in between like each pool.
Am I able to jump out of the pool stealthily and roll stealth and then go to the next pool?
Yeah, you can certainly try.
I would give it a shot.
OK.
I'm going to say he's going to have some pretty major disadvantage because he's attacking
(14:48):
currently and you already stealth.
If you don't beat that.
Eighteen.
Oh, my God.
Yes.
Yeah, you stay hidden.
Sweet.
Probably from everyone in the room.
I love it.
Yeah.
And I'd say, oh, your movement speed just dump into the next pool.
Yep.
OK.
(15:09):
You just hop over to the next one.
Oh, yeah.
Morgana, your turn.
You're behind a dragon.
I will cast I see grip.
OK.
No, doesn't count.
Doesn't cast.
Doesn't cast.
You can push the spell if you want.
Push it.
Push it.
(15:30):
Push it.
Push it.
Push it.
So how low are you?
How much did you miss the TN by?
Eight, nine, ten, eleven.
The target number is twelve.
So you would just spend an extra mana or an extra magic point to do it.
Yeah, I'll do that.
Plus the cost of it originally.
Minus five.
OK.
Cool.
That succeeds.
So he takes the one D6 and at the start of his turn makes the roll.
(15:52):
Yes.
I think I used Envelop him in the cloud of ice.
That is six points damage.
Dang.
Nevermind.
Is penetrating.
OK, first the fire, now the ice.
Like, why?
I had the air conditioning set perfect.
I didn't like the air conditioning in here.
Guys, I feel horrible about this.
(16:14):
Humidity was great for my collection.
I have wooden items back there.
And I can freeze them for you.
That'll split them.
Don't do that.
Why would you even do that?
No, seriously, why?
Anything for a minor action.
Um, for a minor, I will.
I will stun fast.
(16:35):
OK.
All right, then that'll take us to the dragon again.
He is going to go ahead and use it for a minor action.
Buff it.
So anyone within four yards, which is the three of you.
We're going to hear right behind him.
Oh, no, sorry.
The beginning of his turn, he has to make that save.
(16:56):
Constitution stamina.
Yes.
Oh, my God, Ben.
Actually, I'm sorry.
It's Dex Acro.
Triple sixes.
Oh, that goes my attack roll, though.
So thanks for that.
You're welcome.
Thank you.
Either way, the buff it.
So the three of you will be affected.
Go ahead and make strength might tests.
So I get to use intelligence.
(17:17):
Yes.
Or no, it's not a magical thing.
He flaps his wings.
Yeah, it's a physical.
He just literally whips up the sand and tries to blow you guys over.
Well, what's your dragon?
Three fifteen fifteen.
(17:38):
Oh, you guys both pass.
We're going to you fell.
So I fell straight.
So you get thrown back six yards into like the center pile of all the stuff, but you're not knocked prone.
So you just kind of get blown back trying to just hold yourself.
Well, he's going to go ahead and take a bite attack at you are gone.
(18:00):
That is triple fours.
So that's going to be a 16 to hit.
So with five stop points because of triples, it's a dragon.
I'm going to make it hurt.
Lethal blow.
Damn.
Go ahead and take 23 damage.
Holy.
(18:22):
He just comes in and just rips you in this huge mom.
That was fucking cool.
That was just as hard on his mouth.
All right.
That'll be his turn to bar him.
All right.
I'm going to take a swing down his neck.
Is this dragon on two legs or four legs?
(18:43):
I mean, four kind of at this point, it has like it has like claws.
But so he has to be down and he's a claw pedal.
All right.
I'm going to aim.
So give me a plus one.
Damn.
I wish I had stones on the 16.
Oh, yeah.
That's 19 damage.
(19:04):
I see parts of like the sand like body are starting to just flake off a little bit.
OK, guys, this is kind of not cool.
I'm sorry, man.
Be gone.
Bit my friend over there.
Well, yeah, I kind of had to come and he hit me with a stick.
Yeah, you fucking did.
Oh, it's fair.
They'll take us to Argonne.
Would like to attack.
(19:25):
I'm kind of freaking out inside of this lizard's mouth.
Son of a gun.
14.
That is three and a four.
Using your halberd still.
Yes.
Seven plus 11.
18 damage.
(19:47):
Yes.
Oh, take that.
Yeah.
See, this is why I bite you.
Dick.
Anything else where you are gone?
Can I use a minor and you guard up?
Yeah.
OK.
Plus one defense.
Yes.
Google Bernard.
I would really like to stay off to the other pool.
All right.
(20:08):
It's going to drive.
Yeah.
About that.
I'd like to use my scouting in the rear all my stuff.
Yeah.
I'll tell you what you have to beat here.
Oh, 18.
Good luck.
I rolled for me.
Let me reroll that.
Please, my bad lady.
(20:30):
That's my dice.
13.
You get out of the pool and, hey, what are you doing back there?
I knew you were trying to get to my stuff.
Don't mind me.
I just like going for swims.
I don't think that's true.
I enjoy swimming.
This isn't a Pilates class, old man.
You got to stay fit and do your cardio.
(20:53):
Anyway, I smelled a thief among you.
So that means you're going to attack him and not us, right?
Probably.
All right.
Do I have any movement or anything left?
What can I do?
I mean, you can go jump in the other pool.
Fucking run, man.
I'm going to jump in the pool.
Just jump in the pool.
Maybe he knows you're there.
Does it make a little...
(21:15):
Perfect.
Morgana.
I'd like to ice grip.
That's two sixes and a five.
One T one.
That beats the TN.
We have a lot of stunts.
Yes.
I will use four stunts points to do my fire breath, flame breath.
(21:40):
And then I'll use battle magic to do a free arcane blast.
Oh, damn.
OK.
So she's casting three, essentially.
So she's got an original cast.
She's got fire and then an arcane blast on top.
Damn.
OK.
So roll your D6 penetrating for the ice.
That's full penetrating for the ice.
(22:02):
OK.
When she's making these spell attacks, like, does it...
Is it three separate, like, dragon heads turning into one?
I mean, for this...
Kind of like how, like, Goku's dragon fist?
Kind of.
That's how I'm imagining when she does the flame breath with herself.
Dude, that's so freaking sick.
Like, if you were to, like, hand and then fire, like, that's dumb.
It would just be like a full on, like, going into it.
(22:24):
That's so badass.
All you Dragon Ball Z nerds out there, that's so sick.
Yeah, thank you, John.
Thanks for being my Dragon Ball Z nerd.
Absolutely.
I am the Dragon Ball Z guy.
Dex, acros.
Oh, which is a 10.
So you get two D6 plus one fire.
Seven, eight.
All right.
(22:46):
And then arcane blast.
You get your arcane blast attack.
11, 12.
That hits.
So that's one D6.
Which is three plus two, five.
That's a nice hit.
All right, yeah.
So this time you combine the third one.
You just get a little under arcane blast in there with your icy fire.
(23:07):
What is wrong?
Why?
Since...
Why do you do both?
That's weird.
I like to keep some variety in there.
Fire and ice, that's really odd.
Since he's turned around facing us, is she just like nailing his nuts every single time?
Damn.
I don't think she would aim for his nuts.
I mean...
(23:30):
Grab his dick and twist it.
Grab his dick and twist it.
You'd have to grapple it first.
You just hear Bernard in the back.
Grab his dick and twist it.
What?
From the water?
Well, anything for a minor action, Morgana.
Smoke a cigarette before a job well done.
All brought up.
(23:51):
Okay.
Geez.
He's gonna go ahead while he has to make his constitution save.
You get him his turn.
Nineteen.
Okay, yeah.
He successes.
It's again taking my good rolls.
You guys are all pissing him off.
Good.
Especially the gnome.
(24:12):
Put his whole mouth in the pool, grab the gnome, take him all out.
He's got a breath weapon.
Argon and barn.
When he did the wing attack, did we take damage from that?
Nope.
He's got pushback.
I was like...
Twelve to hit.
Yeah, it hits because Berserker gets a minus two to defend.
(24:33):
Well, you have a minus two because of Berserker.
Motherf...
Yes.
Okay, so you guys both get hit again.
No.
You can make acrobatics tests.
13.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
13?
Nope.
Uh, yes.
The take four penetrating.
(24:55):
It's not too bad.
And then he's going to fly back 15 yards towards his horde.
So over you Morgana and kind of closer to the pool that Bernard is in.
That'll take us to barn.
So now this dragon is 15 yards away from you.
I'll walk to move and charge.
I get you 15 yards.
(25:17):
Yeah, I'm at eight right now.
So if I move eight, then it's half of that.
It's 12.
You know, I'm going to run and use my movement to see if I can try to get behind him a little bit.
Okay.
So you kind of want to try to get around.
So that's going to be 20.
Okay.
So move.
So it's going to be 16.
Actually, I don't think you can move and run at the same.
(25:39):
Oh, then I will move 16 and do minor minor.
So you just get up to him.
Yeah.
Okay.
Argon, you're in the same boat 15 yards away.
15.
But you actually have a range weapon.
But when did that take my turn?
If I drew out my short bow, it's just a minor to switch.
(26:00):
I totally forgot.
I'll take out my short bow.
And I believe that's your range.
The crossbow range is like 30 yards.
I know.
I totally forgot to pull it out.
Well, like, that's the minimum.
You can't use it unless someone's outside of 30.
Max for mine is a 32.
Well, what's your short?
16.
So yeah, that's fine.
(26:22):
He's within range.
But well, do you have to be at least 16 away?
Take a step back.
You're within that.
That's okay.
I'm not going to be that much of a stickler over one.
Thanks, buddy.
See you.
Roll your tech.
What is up with today?
Eight plus.
(26:44):
If you bring your own dice, maybe you can roll better.
Yeah, it does not hit.
It's a 10.
Well, these are my own dice.
The dragon dies at least mine.
Oh, damn it.
That's what happens.
Oh, I got double.
You know what?
Maybe I should.
It doesn't matter if you can hit.
I should have gotten you dice for Christmas.
Back to Bernardo.
I'd like to take my chances with this piranha.
You swim?
(27:05):
Yep.
Okay.
Dragon's guy's head right at the go.
I'm going to come on.
Roll swimming test.
All right.
13.
That's just enough to get through them without them being able to attack.
I love it.
You just swim through them and get to the other hole.
Yeah, go ahead and roll stealth.
(27:27):
Okay.
Since you were able to move.
13.
Yeah.
You beat him.
No way.
So he doesn't know where you are now.
Oh, I love this game.
As far as what hole you're in.
That'll take us to Margana.
I think this time I'll just arcane blast.
Okay.
Absinthe 11.
That does not hit.
That's all I got.
I will, um, I'm going to roll.
Okay.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
(27:48):
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
I'm going to roll.
Okay.
So, that's a draw.
Okay.
I will, um, guard it.
Okay.
(28:09):
Uh, that takes us back to the dragon.
Yeah.
I'll do a bite attack on Arn since you ride a Bonham.
Oh, geez.
It's 12 to hit with three stump points.
Mm.
This is going to hurt.
Isn't it?
Uh.
How can I hate and respect someone at the same time?
He's going to lighten an attack.
Oh, damn, good one.
(28:29):
So you will take 13 damage.
And then he'll come at you with a claw for the lightning.
13 to hit.
Yep.
That would have been five stomp points.
Yeah.
Nine damage.
And then he is going to fly another 15 yards to his horde
(28:51):
right in front of the last pool.
Excuse me?
I know there's a thief in here.
What's with stuff?
Would you quit moving?
I'm not after your stuff.
I'm after you now.
You guys, that guy has bad cardio, man.
Look, and he's not even moving.
He's breathing hard.
I know.
I don't know what's up with that.
He was breathing hard when I met him.
He breathes that hard in his sleep.
And when he prays, I don't know.
(29:12):
That'll take us two.
I think he needs a nose strip.
You're doing barn.
Across what is 30 yards, correct?
Mm-hmm.
Minor, minor.
That's my turn.
You go up to him?
Yep.
Okay.
Argon.
He's like 30 yards away from this dude.
(29:33):
Damn.
Well, he's still within range of my short bow.
I guess I'll just try to shoot him again.
Okay.
And after this turn, your Berserker will drop.
Okay.
I thought it's for encounter.
Two turns without a melee attack.
Oh.
Three, two.
Okay, so that's a six plus.
(29:53):
Plus the plus two.
Which is an eight, which does not hit.
Motherf.
Your dice are cursed.
Here, do you want to use the good dice?
Yes, give me these dice.
Damn it.
Which will bring us back up to Bernard.
Oh.
You're in this pool and you just see the figure
(30:14):
of this sand dragon above the surface.
Is there any way I could get air while sneakily breathing?
I'm gonna say no on this one.
If you come up for air, he's gonna know you're there.
All right.
Do I know how much time left I have to breathe?
I mean, what did I say it was?
(30:34):
12 rounds.
12 rounds.
Three minutes.
You just started that, so yeah, you have,
you got some time.
Okay.
I would like to,
let's go ahead and,
I'm just gonna swim there and I pull out my,
I guess I pull out my fustable just in case.
(30:56):
Okay.
And then I load it with one of my mushrooms.
A mushroom?
Oh yeah, you take it.
You haven't rolled for that yet.
For your mushroom talent.
No, I haven't.
Yeah, you should do that.
What do I do?
I didn't even write anything.
Roll a D6 while I sent you the info.
Oh, that's right, it's on text.
(31:17):
Yeah, so go ahead and roll a D6.
I know it's that much.
I don't remember the specifics.
It's on my head.
Yeah.
So what's your constitution?
My con is two.
So roll two D6s and tell me what the numbers are.
Oh!
Off the.
So each separate number.
(31:39):
One, six, one, two.
Six and a two.
So a two is a mushroom that will cause paranoia.
Great, we need this guy to be even more paranoid.
God, now he's tripping.
And then a six is one that causes paralysis.
Oh no.
So the only way to use these
without having somebody just like eat them,
like you can hide them in like somebody's food,
(32:00):
or if they willingly eat it, the effect will happen.
Otherwise as an attack, it would be a two stunt point
to like either infuse it like onto your dagger
or load it into Feastable.
Okay, so I can't use like the assassin talent?
You can use your assassin talent.
You can mark the dragon.
GM.
Because that's what that does.
And then you just do two extra damage every time you hit it.
(32:21):
That'd be cool.
Because it's like pick out a spot of weakness.
I didn't know if I could do his mouth.
Yeah.
Sweet.
Swap and see if he gets bitten.
Can you just like drop a couple in his throat?
I mean, if something,
cause you're from the mouth of something,
I would definitely give you some easy rolls.
Hon.
But you'd have to be actively in the mouth.
Okay.
So yeah, you can do that.
(32:42):
Yeah, I'm gonna load my Feastable.
Okay.
Is marking him as an assassin.
That's a minor.
That's a minor.
Yep.
Do I have a minor left or no?
Because you got your Feastable ready now.
So it's two minors.
You just stay under the water.
Morgana.
You're fairly far from this thing now, 23 yards.
(33:04):
I will start.
I will use a minor to move 12 yards.
Okay.
So what's that?
How far?
32 you said?
He was 23.
So now you're 11.
And then I will Arcane Blast.
Okay.
18.
(33:24):
Yeah, it hits.
So it was five stun points.
I guess I will Mighty Blow and Pierce Armor.
Okay.
And then you just have one more.
You can skirmish yourself.
So that's 10.
And then I can skirmish myself forward.
(33:44):
Yeah.
Oh, plus my Willpower, 12.
Yeah, he's definitely taking damage.
Which takes us back to him.
I just got here.
Stop following me.
You're too close to my stuff.
(34:05):
Stop moving.
That lava on your beard, don't get that on my stuff.
I'm not trying to, sorry.
Yeah, he's gonna bite you, Baron.
You're the easiest target.
Which is a 10 to hit.
Yeah.
Four stun points.
That's fine.
(34:27):
Mighty Blow, Pierce Armor.
14 damage.
All right.
And for a minor, he's gonna guard up.
Just take us to Baron.
I would like to start, I'm gonna aim.
(34:49):
18.
Yeah, it hits.
Okay.
No stuns?
No.
It was a five, six and a one.
18 damage.
All right, seriously, this is not cool, guys.
Did you fucking hurt?
No, you're hurting me.
You're hurt.
No, you're hurt.
No, dude, you're hurt.
No, dude, you're hurt.
Now I can see it, you're bleeding.
I know and you're losing sand over there.
(35:09):
So?
Dude, I can see it leaking from your body.
I have lots of sand.
I know, just put it back in yourself.
Yeah, put the blood back in yourself.
I'm trying.
It's gross.
I'm trying to live over here, how is that gross?
Aren't you supposed to be berserkered?
Yeah.
And?
I thought you didn't talk.
No, I can talk.
(35:30):
Right.
Argon.
Argon, fine.
Arr.
The dragon speaks berserker.
They're just like.
Arr.
Arr.
Arr.
Arr.
Arr.
Arr.
Arr.
Your turn, Argon.
Just like a motorboat in everything.
The mermaid's not here.
(35:53):
I would like to move.
Yeah, you have 13 yards of movement.
So you can get 13 yards closer.
Okay.
Yeah.
I'll do that.
So you're still 27 yards away?
Yeah.
I mean, you can do that twice.
Okay.
17, so now you're only four yards away.
Yay.
So you're back up on the dragon.
Yeah, bitch.
About time, those arrows sucked.
(36:14):
I don't think you could hit the broadside of a barn, dude.
Okay, first off, I'm winded.
I have no cardio.
Clearly.
You know, the dragon's also right.
You couldn't hit shit.
Pull out your sword, pull out your weapon.
Yeah, you might be able to do something.
That stick actually kind of hurt.
Hold on a minute.
(36:34):
Fine.
Barnard, under the water.
I didn't mean to hurt your feelings.
I'm definitely about to lose my breath here soon.
Do you understand three minutes?
To make another Dragon Ball Z reference,
he's like Goku under the water
with his Kamehameha's right now.
He's just holding his skin there.
He's just freezing,
and he's literally just holding his weapon.
(36:55):
Dude, that was awesome.
So that was kind of basically like two rounds of combat.
You have like 12 rounds.
Yeah, you still have 10 more rounds.
Oh, I thought it was every time you guys did something.
No, no, no.
Every round, round.
So yeah, from the top.
So every time you go is the start of a new round,
which is only 15 seconds.
(37:15):
To give fight perspective, yeah, it's only 15 seconds
that all of you guys are doing everything at the same time.
Okay. That's how fast these fights are.
There's some reason I thought it was every movement,
not the end of initiative.
No, everyone goes simultaneously, technically.
Like if you're watching the battle,
it would be insanely fast.
Okay. Well, let's rewind.
(37:38):
I still have my breath, so.
You're just gonna hang out?
He's just floating there.
What do I see around me?
Is there more than one hole?
I understand that.
You're best friends.
I mean, there's just the other pools,
like the light coming down from the other ones
in a circle around this arena.
Am I in the farthest pool to the walls?
You're right next to the horde.
(37:59):
Oh man.
And there's one last hole to get.
Well, there's like, so you have the one you came in,
you hopped, you hopped, and then there's another one,
another one, another one, so they're just going
in a big circle.
Oh, okay.
So I'm as far as I can get to the wall.
You're right there, yeah.
And he's right on top of me.
Yes.
Damn.
Doesn't like people touching stuff.
But no, it's always on top.
I really feel out of place here.
(38:22):
Yeah, I guess I'll just hang out for a second.
Wasn't there four of you?
No.
I thought there was.
I mean, there's four of us in this room right now.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
Weird.
I thought there was an old man.
That wouldn't make sense.
You guys wouldn't bring an old guy in here.
That'd be just ridiculous.
Absolutely.
(38:43):
He'll fall over.
No, not at all.
How old are you?
I don't know.
I don't remember.
I think at least 600.
Why are you even in here?
Why are you in?
Oh, my, Habela told me to chill in here.
Protect her stuff.
All my stuff.
And you do what she says?
Yeah, she's a god.
(39:04):
Fair point.
You don't listen to your god?
I listen to my god, but why do you listen to her?
Because she's my god.
I thought you followed the god of the dragons.
Why you follow a mermaid?
Oh, well, I'm not technically like a dragon dragon.
Like she has like the dragon blood.
She has scales and stuff.
Yeah, but you got to.
She's a dragon like made from sand.
(39:27):
But isn't that a dragon?
Yes.
So you're not a real dragon?
I'm a sand dragon.
But you're also a dragon?
Yes.
All right, hold on a sec.
All right, I'm gonna put my weapon down.
I sit down.
I'm like, okay.
I do breath attacks.
I have wings.
I'm just made of sand.
So that's a fucking dragon.
Yes, but not like a scale dragon.
(39:48):
Not a Yavala dragon.
Oh, I'm gonna figure it out.
Morgana, your turn.
I'm sorry you're winded from this.
Let's go ahead and arcane blast again.
14.
That hits.
(40:09):
Three points damage.
Yeah, it just like kind of pings off some of the sea glass.
Oh, see I am a dragon.
Look, it doesn't hurt.
You're the one convinced me that you're not a dragon.
And I will god up.
Okay.
Nothing.
(40:30):
Okay.
Okay.
That'll take us back to the dragon.
Sandrix, since you moved back up there Argon,
we're gonna do a breath weapon on you too.
Fucking hell, that is 16 to hit.
How far does the breath weapon go?
(40:50):
Am I out of range?
I believe you are.
Eight long, two wide.
You're just outside of the range.
I'm at nine yards.
Or no, four yard.
Yeah, four by six wide for the cone.
Cause you can choose between a cone and a stream.
That's fucking cool.
Dude.
Yeah.
You guys make acrobatics tests.
(41:11):
You guys know I can do this in a stream too.
Not just like a cone.
Wait, what?
It's cool.
You know what?
We host these underground fights.
You know, you'd be perfect for, you know,
like one of these nights.
Well, I don't want to leave.
This is my stuff.
You can bring your stuff.
No.
All right.
15.
(41:34):
So close.
Fuck you.
I rolled a third.
Yeah, both fail.
I rolled a 13 too.
You were just there, man.
Six, four and a three.
Why are we so identical?
One under.
Did you count your decks?
Count your decks.
Plus two.
Yeah, you don't have the acrobatics focus.
Yeah, I don't.
(41:55):
So close.
I'll see both.
Did you get 15?
Yeah.
Fuck.
Yeah, you both fail.
Just barely.
I'm going to die.
Six penetrating damage.
Stop copying me.
You're going to die.
I'm going to die.
You're both going to die.
You're both going to die.
Minus six from the health.
Yep, yeah.
Directly from your health, no armor.
(42:15):
It's penetrating.
And we'll go ahead and do a Buffet also.
So go ahead and make strength might test as well.
The two of you.
Fire.
15.
Five, six and a two.
That's 13 plus your strength might.
To three.
(42:35):
So that's a 16?
Yeah.
Yeah, that passes.
You guys are good.
You just stand your ground against the wind of the dragon.
Woo, I'm still alive.
See, this is why I'm attacking you guys.
You're a little strong.
You know, I'll take that as a compliment.
Dragon just gave us a compliment, guys.
You know, I feel pretty good right now.
Oh, you do.
I swear there was an old guy.
No, no, no, no.
(42:56):
Am I losing it?
There's only three.
You know what?
You're right, where is he?
See, I knew it.
Shut up.
You know what?
He's right.
You just kissed the dragon.
You just kissed the dragon, man.
Yes.
Dude, that's not cool.
Just take it.
Did you just get sand in your mouth?
(43:18):
You couldn't feel the crunching.
Oh, the worst.
I have to ask what's with you in that.
He's one of those weird yammy guys.
You still haven't told me how you felt.
Why you still feel bad?
About what?
You don't remember how you felt bad, really,
before we walked into clam and now you're...
Oh, nevermind.
(43:38):
This is not the place for the group therapy
that was supposed to be done in the hot tub.
We already did that in the hot tub.
Enough, attack.
So we shouldn't be talking about bad vibes.
That's bad for the collection.
Oh, sorry.
How you doing?
I'm fine.
All right.
You look hurt.
You look hurt.
No, I'm fine.
Not guilty.
I'm hurt.
(43:59):
Barron, your turn.
Barron, your turn.
I'm gonna back up two yards
and then I'm gonna charge.
Okay.
It's only plus two, right?
Or is it plus one?
Plus one, you're right.
Thank you.
I mean, you know also there is such a thing
as an all out attack, right?
If you don't wanna move.
(44:20):
No, I did not know.
All out attack.
I didn't write that down.
If you hit the major.
You choose to replace one of your damage dice
with the result of the attack roll stunt die
but you're required to do so.
Whether or not this attack hits,
you suffer a two to your defense to your next turn.
So that means I what again with my stunt die?
(44:41):
So say you rolled like a five on the stunt die
and you hit and then you rolled your damage
and one of them was like a two.
You could use the five instead of the two.
That's cool.
I didn't understand that when I read it.
So it's called an all out attack?
Uh-huh.
I'm gonna try that.
I'm gonna try it.
Instead of backing up and doing the charge, right?
Yep.
(45:01):
So it's just a major.
Then I guess we're gonna aim.
Okay.
That's a good call.
Oh, Jesus roll big.
Die.
So that's a 17 on its own.
Holy shit.
20, 22, 22.
Yeah, you missed.
What?
(45:21):
No.
I saw that kind of tracking.
Yeah, that fucking hits.
So what's your stunt die?
Six.
Dragon die.
So you have a six to use for your damage.
All right.
After you add six stump points.
Good God.
I'm going to pierce armor for two.
(45:45):
Pierce armor, mighty blow.
I actually have shit to think about.
Oh yeah, this is a big, big decision.
He's more than a man.
He's a shiny golden guard.
Oh, oh, I'm gonna do crushing blow
and reduce his armor by two.
Yeah, you can do that with a mighty blow too.
(46:08):
Because you have six points.
I'll do that in a mighty.
All right.
Actually, no, I'm gonna do that and a pierce armor.
Oh, you dick.
I'm gonna replace that too with a six.
Okay.
Okay.
So, oh, with a mighty.
So that's 10, 13.
(46:28):
Fuck.
14, 19, 20, 21 damage.
With a pierce armor.
Yeah.
And the defense lower also.
Yeah, by two.
Which makes it zero.
What'd you say 21?
21.
No, not lethal.
(46:50):
Not lethal.
Not lethal.
Please, I don't wanna, I just wanna knock his ass out.
Guys, we can knock his ass out and take all this stuff.
So yeah, you.
We can really make this guy feel normal.
You just go and all out,
throw everything you have,
your rest of your life force,
cause I assume you're pretty hurt.
Yeah, I'm pretty fucking hurt.
Just the last ditch effort,
you swing your ax up and just break in.
(47:11):
Oh shit.
No man, come on.
I'm sorry.
Oh shit.
He just explodes into sand crystals.
What?
Yes.
All right.
Let's grab the gnome, let's grab his shit
and we'll just fucking leave as fast as we can.
No, you guys don't have to leave.
You see that little bit of sand structure
turns into a tiny little version of Sandrix
(47:33):
from the sand pile.
Guys, come on.
Is he like, is he fucking solid?
I'd like to jump out of the water
and hit him with my first ball.
Can I scoop him?
Yeah, scoop and go ahead and make opposed
acrobatics versus attack roll.
Pick on someone your own size.
You guys are the same height.
(47:55):
What am I doing?
They're all in attack with your fusible.
That's what you wanted to do.
16.
18.
Yeah, you scoop him right in the mushroom flies past.
What's up man?
I didn't want to kill you, man.
I'm sorry.
Oh, I don't die.
Look, I'm fine.
I can regrow after like, I don't know,
(48:16):
a couple hundred years.
Is this guy freaking serious?
So we can keep him as a pet.
I absolutely would.
I don't know if, well, you could ask a Bella
if you could take me, I guess.
Isabella is okay.
Isabella.
Who's Isabella?
I'm sorry.
I'm so confused.
I thought this dragon would be a lot tougher.
I thought I'd steal some magic stuff.
Hey you're a sneaky little thief.
(48:36):
Yeah, you are a thief.
You guys took him out before I could even get to the stuff.
Why haven't happened to the gold that we're given?
What are you talking about?
You don't remember the gold from the mob boss?
He threw a sack of gold out the,
I still haven't been able to find it, you guys.
Well, congratulations are in order for you guys.
Thanks man.
You completed the trials of Isabella.
(48:57):
Super proud of you.
Nice job.
You know, you can come with us
and then your stuff will just follow you where you go.
You don't have to lose it.
That's a really fair point.
Well, I won't be big for a long time.
So, can you guys carry it for me?
Fuck yeah, dude.
All right, well here's the thing.
(49:18):
So there's stuff or you could just ask Isabella
to just have like a blessing.
I'm still so confused.
I really thought there'd be a bigger fight
and I didn't even help
and I feel really shameful right now.
I was trying-
You were swimming the entire time.
You kind of should.
I was just trying to get magical stuff to help-
What are you, like an assassin or something?
(49:38):
Like shifty tactics, probably fighting.
Can I push him back in the pool?
Can I throw him?
Can I throw him back in the pool?
I really-
Can I roll?
I'm gonna roll.
One on one.
You're going to get the piranhas.
Dex acrobatics.
I really apologize guys.
I was trying to help.
I just didn't know it would be that easy for you.
(49:58):
Acrobatics.
Bernard.
What do I do?
Dexterity acrobatics.
Six plus two.
That's it?
Yeah.
For your strength might?
17.
I got 15.
Can I just-
(50:20):
Is your rope still hanging?
I'd like to grab his rope so he can't go far.
Oh my gosh.
You can add like a tether so we like tap him
to go back in the pool and just get his yanked little things.
I'm gonna pull him back so you can't throw him.
That's a fail.
See how Bernard you dodge out of the way.
It's all good cubs to grab you.
I told you I'm sorry.
I was trying to help the best way I knew how.
You were swimming the entire time.
(50:42):
I took a swimming talent.
I really thought I would come and hand it.
I almost died.
Well, you're fine.
I have seven health.
You guys can take a breather here if you need to.
Thanks.
I'll have to take a breather.
But either way, let me tell you,
he pulls these cards out from his bag.
Let me tell you what you might get.
(51:02):
What?
Do you think I could use my fire
to turn him into a little ice drag?
Like a little glass dragon?
Glass dragon, but then I'd break like real easy.
Yeah, I mean, he's really cool.
I don't want to kill him.
Just put him out of his misery.
I don't know if I can die.
Don't you dare go near the dragon.
I'm like literally like kind of made specifically by a god.
(51:25):
I don't know if I can actually die.
Yeah, I don't want you to die.
The couple times I've been destroyed,
I just come back as this.
But you know what?
I don't want to test that theory.
Fair enough.
Can I kiss him?
Yeah, please do.
All right, here you go.
I pull him off my shoulder.
Oh, geez.
Oh my God.
He gets hand mouthed.
So to let you guys know your choice here,
(51:47):
I will tell you what the blessing is,
but I will not, and I will tell you what the items are.
I will not tell you what the items do
until lest you choose to take it.
Understood.
So this is the blessing you can choose
in lieu of an item.
And each of you get to pick either the blessing or an item.
So the blessing of a Bella.
So like whenever you're within 10 miles
(52:07):
of the ocean or the sea,
you'll receive a plus one attack rolls
against every creature, plus two against any sea creature.
And you get the use of healing waters every 24 hours,
which is a healing spell.
And you get the aquatic quality,
which means you can breathe underwater and swim like normal.
(52:28):
What are the items?
The items you see before you, all my stuff, man.
So I got like this super cool, like sea glass thing.
And it's this orb that is a piece of sea glass
that is shimmering with like gold filigree around it.
It's misshapen, but it's definitely looks like ornamental.
There's this cool piece of coral,
(52:49):
and it's this big giant like speared out,
almost like a trident,
but like weaving in itself of like long coral,
super sharp tip, like a spear, like coral spear.
I use it as a toothpick, but we also have the seaweed,
like cloth thing.
(53:10):
You can like hide stuff in it.
And this is this veil of seaweed cloak,
like dark black green.
Then there's the shell.
Is it a magic conch?
The big pink conch shell.
I don't really get a say because I didn't help very much,
but-
You did not.
Yeah.
(53:30):
I'll let you guys pick.
You guys can pick.
I mean, I don't think you should let the whole guy
have anything.
No, not at all.
What?
Can I try to throw him again?
You start chasing him around.
I'm mad.
I was trying to help.
The two of you, I guess, who wants to pick first?
So there's-
Damn, this is hard.
So you got the shell, you got the cloak,
and you got the spear, and you got the conch shell.
(53:53):
So it's-
So there's the seaweed, seaweed trout,
Seaweed wrap.
The endless conch, the coral spear,
and the arcane sea glass.
This sounds fucking dope.
Or, you know, a blessing from God is not the battle either.
Or the blessing of a bella.
So both are permanent.
If you get the blessing of a bella right now,
anytime you're within 10 miles,
I'll like check on the map that I have,
(54:15):
and if you're anywhere within coastline,
you get that blessing.
Once you have the blessing, it never goes away.
And that's just around the sea water or water?
So it's-
So sea, the ocean.
So each of us get to pick either blessing or weapon.
Oh, I thought it was like one blessing
for only one person in the group can have the blessing.
No, you can choose between either
if you personally want the blessing,
(54:36):
or if you want to pick one of the items.
All right.
I don't want-
You can all go first.
Please don't be mad at me, I'm sorry.
You know, I wasn't-
You know, the mermaid chick really got in my head.
She's all, yeah, you need steel, mine, and all that crap.
And I'm like, what, steel oats?
And she said, not steel oats.
And then I was really sounding my thoughts.
I thought, okay, let's swing to the magic stuff.
(54:57):
Hold on, he holds up his little dragon club.
Props for trying shooting your shot, man.
Thank you.
I do, I can't, he's got some balls.
I'll say that.
I'm gonna throw you now.
I appreciate it.
He's a coward in battle, but he has some balls.
I was trying to get the magic stuff
to help beat the magic sand dragon.
I mean, that's actually a pretty fair strategy.
That's actually pretty nice.
I thought it was a mind game.
(55:17):
I didn't think, I thought you'd regenerate
every time you got hit by the sand and maybe the water.
You couldn't go in the water.
You should totally have regeneration this time.
You know what?
Yeah.
Dang.
Ask your Bella.
You know what?
We'll find some magic shit for you to regenerate.
Well, that'd be cool.
Well, either way, don't you guys have somewhere to be?
Shouldn't you make this kinda quick?
Can I choose to bring you along
(55:39):
instead of the item or what?
You could, well.
Are you okay with that?
I'll just, I can ask the mermaid.
All right.
I'll wait.
If you get the cloak, you can hide him in your cloak.
I don't know.
She's been talking weird.
She's made it seem like you guys were the last ones
that were ever gonna be here.
All right, so.
(56:01):
Maybe I won't be needed anymore.
And then you won't be fed anymore.
You should.
Put out of your misery.
You'll starve to death.
Even if you will have one.
I'm not dying.
He's not dying.
Oh, okay, sorry.
I'm not a drowned seagull.
Oh, you heard about that.
Well, it's an old adage.
Oh, that's right.
It's been around since the Halthor Empire.
So have I.
So this guy's been around for six hundred years.
(56:23):
He's also has knowledge.
That wasn't long enough for that,
but that was before my time even.
Just kidding.
I just know about it.
So after our decision, you will remain here.
Fuck no.
I'm gonna try to go with you guys.
Yeah, I'm taking him with me.
I'm taking him with us.
I ain't land this guy.
I have a size fucking dope.
I don't wanna sit here and not have anyone around.
Not eat ever again.
No, I can't have that.
(56:43):
He would make a great addition to the team.
Thanks.
You just thought about leaving?
We need all the allies we can do.
We can take your guys stuff.
You know, that's a fair point.
Absa fucking lutely.
Cool.
And we'll carry your stuff for you in the meantime.
See, it's an even bargain.
Now we have two dragons.
This is what I like.
Oh, that's right.
Well, now you have a sand dragon and a half dragon.
(57:04):
Kind of.
You wanna go by health?
Whoever has the lowest health picks first.
I mean, you guys could also go by initiative, but.
It's tough.
That's not fair.
I have the highest initiative.
I'll take the blessing.
You'll take the blessing?
I'll take the blessing.
No, wait.
Can we just like bring that item along and just not use it
so he can have the stuff?
No.
(57:24):
But we're taking his stuff with us.
We're carrying it for him.
You want the blessing?
Yeah.
Are you sure?
Why do you have to say it like that, man?
Just making sure.
It's a trick.
I don't want it anymore.
No.
I'll fucking take the blessing.
Okay.
Thank you.
(57:45):
Yeah, Bernard, you get to go last.
That's fine.
Argon, what would you like?
Man, I don't know.
There's so many good choices in this.
All right.
I will choose the cloak.
Seaweed shroud.
Thank you.
All right.
(58:05):
What the hell?
What does the dragon want?
Holy crap.
The dragon needs to go before the gnome.
Oh my God.
Hell yeah.
I'm taking the blessing.
Any hints on what the magic conch shell does?
You can make an intelligence arcana arcane lore.
(58:28):
13.
It's magical.
Definitely magic.
You're not sure exactly what its magic is,
but you know it's magical.
Smells fishy.
You could talk to your girlfriend through that.
You think?
Yeah, no one's ever taken that one.
It's been here for a really long time.
Yeah, there's only been like,
there's actually a stockpile that's overflowing.
(58:50):
No one has taken one.
How big is that, you know, pointy fork, spear?
Trident thing.
It's a spear.
It's like,
definitely.
For you, it would be really hard to wield probably.
That's what I was thinking.
You know, I can do like a pull cube, God.
I can actually hold it for you
and then you can use the power
just to let your momentum to push it.
(59:12):
I can guide it and you can fucking, you know, stab someone.
I'll do the magic conch.
Thank you.
Hold on.
It's kind of a silly thing,
but I think it's really fun for the party to have.
Especially for Bernard.
Yeah, I think actually Bernard might be the best one
to have that.
Really?
Okay, can I read this?
(59:32):
Yeah, go for it.
As a major action,
you cause a number of gallons of water equal
to your willpower,
minimum one gallon to pour out of the conch.
This water can pour into a container
and is clean and safe to drink.
Onto a small fire to quench it or even onto a target.
(59:53):
Such a target must make a strength might
to avoid being knocked prone.
So it's heavy water.
You know, that'll be also good
and best situation since you're a assassin.
So it pretty much can just at will.
So like out of combat, you can literally just make water.
That's good.
For one, you won't stop.
We're in a bad situation.
(01:00:13):
If you make enough, you can swim in it.
If you're too young.
And as you grab it, it's like this big to you
and it shrinks down to like your size.
So you can easily just handle it.
That's cool.
Like a mini spring.
Cool.
Well, you always have clean water now.
Yeah.
So as you take that item and you guys get your blessings.
So Baron and Morgana, two of you,
as the other items just sink back into the wall,
(01:00:36):
just feel this light and this warmth
and hear like crashing waves.
The blessing of a Bella is put upon you.
Cool guys.
Yay.
So what are you doing now?
We're gonna fight some fucking pirates.
Cool.
And you're coming.
Right.
Yeah.
(01:00:57):
Well, let's go see a shell opens back up
at the other end of the room.
You know, it just driving.
It took a minute.
Can we take it?
Literally one minute.
Give it a breath.
Yeah, you guys gotta breath.
Oh my God.
Damn.
Okay.
So take back your health.
That's why I'm so confused.
I got out of the pool one minute.
Yeah, I just, you guys were way stronger
as the two like sword guys.
(01:01:17):
I didn't know you guys would kamikaze that shit.
You know, I thought you'd kind of use strategic.
It's kind of what I'm used to.
I'm just used to hitting something until it stops moving.
That's definitely like the least strategy I've ever seen,
but it worked out really well.
That's usually how we go into five.
Thanks.
It's going to be interesting though
with the pirate guy, huh?
Yeah, I'll put you on my shoulder.
(01:01:38):
You guys head back out to the cove, I assume.
Yeah, what the fuck is right?
He's out.
Oh, you actually survived.
I'm sure all of you did your fair part in the trial.
Not really.
Not all of us.
Oh, I know.
I watched the whole thing.
I was kidding.
You really got in my head with the whole steal oats thing.
I told you to steal your mind.
What does that mean?
(01:01:59):
If you have to ask, you'll never know,
even at almost 300 years.
What, does it mean be mindless
and just suicide into this dragon?
I mean, I didn't mean that,
but it's definitely seemed to work.
Even I'm not that dense.
Oh, Sandrick's, you were allowed to leave the lair.
Yeah, I guess I'm free.
Yeah, I didn't want him to starve in there
since we're probably the last ones in there.
(01:02:20):
Well, clearly you are then.
Save a life, give a life, take a life.
I mean, that means it's true.
So, Habela's blessing is leaving this land.
I'm so fucking.
So there's a darker tiding here than the captain.
This Broden with his halvedix god.
It's very concerning.
(01:02:42):
One question I should have thought of beforehand,
but these blessings from Habela,
when Habela leaves the land,
we kind of lose the blessing, right?
It's the last piece that she left, so.
Oh, so it's permanent.
She says not adding any more to the world.
Oh, I see.
Damn, I should have took that.
I mean, the conscious meat.
(01:03:06):
No one's ever taken it.
It will keep you from dying in dire situations,
from starvation.
You just always be hydrated.
I'm sure you'll find some use for it.
You think if I added coffee grounds,
I could have permanent coffee?
You know what?
It's worth a shot.
You can always make coffee wherever you are.
Pop coffee into the shell.
(01:03:26):
We'll just have to.
So it expenses.
It turns into an old Stanley thermos.
All we have to do is just boil it.
But nice.
I suppose you'll be on your way.
Be wary.
Like I said, the halvedix problem,
it's more concerning to me than Bolton,
even though the Bolton one is more pressing.
(01:03:48):
Well, I have time.
There's really not supposed to be any other gods.
This halvedix is a new name.
Well, hold on a sec.
Not supposed to be another god.
It's my god, doesn't fucking matter.
Oh, what, your follower of Torvine?
Yeah.
He's one of the old.
Yeah, I know.
There shouldn't be new gods.
I thought your god's name was Gimli.
(01:04:10):
Give me what?
I don't know.
What are you giving me?
Give me your conch shell.
No, I want it.
Did you though?
Did you really?
Okay, well I got the pink.
I'll trade you for all that gold.
So as a final, well, ass boon,
aside from having sandrix.
He's fucking dope.
(01:04:30):
I think my time here is probably done as well.
Where would you like to go back to?
Anywhere?
Temple.
We'll get to pick.
If I could go back home, that'd be really nice.
I could grab my jacquan roast.
That seems like you'd be a coward.
You know what?
We're gonna ask her to drop us off at the academy
(01:04:50):
and we can just actually just.
Well, anywhere within the city.
Oh.
Can drop you at the.
Can it be outside?
Back at the temple.
Like in the waters.
I mean.
Well, pirates are.
Near the docks or, there is actually an alcove
on the coast.
How about you just put us up on the pirate ship there
and we just get it over with and kill the guy.
(01:05:13):
If only I could,
but there's definitely something unholy about that man.
Well, we need to go back to warn the town
or what's left of the town.
Well, you have that magic stone.
Oh shit.
Oh yeah.
I forgot.
It's a good thing I was watching.
(01:05:33):
Thank God the gods are here.
I was looking at it, but you know,
didn't think about what I had.
So should we use this to communicate before we shove off?
So, you know, we can actually develop a plan.
Wait, you guys are actually gonna make a strategy?
I'm not used to that.
I try to do it myself and I get blasted for it.
So I was thinking we can talk to them
(01:05:53):
and let us know that, you know,
where should we appear, what's the plan, what we're doing?
And then we can ask her to, you know,
drop us off where we need to be.
You know, I hate to say it,
but let's just talk to the night lieutenant.
Yeah, you guys need to make a call.
Do you not want to?
Agreed.
We need to make a quick phone call.
Can I get my one phone call?
Not guilty.
(01:06:15):
I think you guys were pretty guilty actually
after watching that.
What happened?
Wait a minute.
You know, that old man that you sent on the war path
actually is still fighting.
What a good guy.
I can't wait to hear his stories.
What'd you guys do when I was gone?
Nothing happened.
Clearly.
(01:06:35):
Yeah, you guys can use my cave
if you want to make a private call.
Oh, fuck you.
Fuck you.
I like this guy.
So you go use the-
Oh my gosh, Spellstone.
Ddu-du-du-du-du-duh.
Ddu-du-du-du-du-duh.
(01:07:02):
Hello.
You're alive?
Yes, we are alive.
Good.
That's very good.
Why do you sound like
you didn't think we would be alive?
It's been almost the three days.
It's been just about two days, so we figured.
Yes, there was a maze and kind of got lost in the maze, but we made it.
Interesting.
(01:07:23):
There was a dragon and yeah.
Well, they're up here.
The night lieutenant got a little rash.
He made a little hole, once of all.
And?
That's a little concerning.
Yeah, we had to barricade it fairly quick, but he was able to get a scout or someone
(01:07:45):
to look out and yes, bad.
The city is a pretty overrun with the more walkers.
Looks like it's the East District has Broden's little lightning vault thing.
And speaking of Broden, yeah, he's come back the past day and took more of our numbers
(01:08:05):
into his ranks.
I don't know what he's planning.
How many are left?
All the way up on our still.
We lost another few guards.
As far as fighting numbers, I think the night lieutenant said around 150.
Oh, that's a lot more than I thought.
Yeah.
So what's your plan?
Yeah, we were.
(01:08:26):
I don't know what's your plan.
What do you want us to do?
We're waiting on you.
We're calling to see what.
Did you get some blessings?
Yes, we did.
We had a conch.
Oh, interesting.
And we can choose to go back to any part of the city.
Right.
Now, this sounds more like something you might want to consult with the night lieutenant.
(01:08:48):
Hold on.
If you ask me, I think we should appear in the prison and that way we can activate the
ballistas and actually launch them upon the ships, take out some of their numbers.
Oh, wow.
You guys are actually alive.
Why does everybody keep saying that?
The trials are deadly.
Like nothing against the four of you.
And someone decided to take a swim.
(01:09:09):
As soon as my mom's cooking, but I don't need it.
Right.
Well, so what are your thoughts?
Well, I thought I'd call you and make Morgana, you know, use her, you know, fun little rock
ringing tone.
And anyway, what do you where do you want us to come at?
And do you want us to like go on the outside of the wall and just kill all the people and
(01:09:30):
then let you guys out?
If you think you can, there's a veritable army out there.
Well, I'm thinking we can actually all go to the prison and that way we can actually
start bringing up the defenses and actually have a fighting chance.
I mean, at the very least, that would definitely be a diversion.
The walls coming down in a few hours and maybe if you draw them to the walls, we could at
(01:09:50):
least get the citizens out.
Is there a intercom system there at the prison?
I don't know if it's up and running.
It was magic stones.
I think I have an idea we can actually gather everyone's attention.
And that place is definitely a fortress in and of itself if they chose to make it that
(01:10:11):
way.
Why is everything run on magic?
You ever heard of cables and electricity?
No, what is that?
Yeah.
That scan is a little behind the times.
Noted.
Wi-Fi is great.
I don't like your mushroom.
I live a noble life.
(01:10:32):
They have no love.
Modest, I think is the word you're looking for.
They have no love as coral.
It ain't much, but it's honest work.
Well, I mean, it doesn't help that Broden keeps harboring and taking more of my guards.
Don't worry, we'll kill him too.
I don't know.
I'm almost have a worse feeling about him than pirates, but we need to get out of here.
(01:10:54):
You have a bad feeling about everybody.
Affir.
So should we go to the prison and create a diversion?
Well, that's just my idea.
I want to hear your thoughts.
Well, you have a plan to evacuate all the citizens.
Yeah, first put some pants on.
Well, we were hoping you would create a diversion or do something to clear a path for them.
(01:11:17):
And otherwise, as far as Broden keeps talking, he has his own small army behind his clouds.
Maybe you could try to get in there and see what he's actually doing.
He's got an army in the clouds.
I think we need to take back prison.
Quick sidebar.
Um, have any of you thought maybe we would just take this and get out of town?
(01:11:40):
I'm worried.
This guy always wants to run, doesn't he?
Yeah, but I have no idea.
I mean, I kind of do.
I was there on the situation.
You saw it?
Yeah, absolutely.
You saw me eating him.
That was a mistake.
I already said I'm sorry.
Okay, guys, what are you thinking?
(01:12:03):
Prison.
You could go anywhere in the city.
You could go out into the streets and see what happens.
You could try the docks, try to get a boat and meet Balton out.
I want to go someplace with some cover.
I don't want to just go into the streets.
We don't know how many eels are out there.
Where's the biggest boat you have?
(01:12:23):
Uh, I'm sure it's been overrun by now, but we did have a military vessel in the dock.
Oh, that's fucking cool.
You guys want to go to a boat?
I like boats.
I do too.
I'm not sure what the state of the ballistas are.
If they're using them or if they'd be ready to, you might get shot out of the water pretty
quick.
Oh, in that case, ballistas.
Wait, where is the main point of attack coming from?
(01:12:45):
Uh, the bay.
The water.
I think we should go there.
If we can eliminate that threat.
Or.
But we need the ballistas to eliminate that threat.
We can also, I mean, if we go.
We might need the ballistas to eliminate.
If we, or we can just take out the ballistas and then we can just head to the main point
of the water.
That way they're not used against us.
Uh, that's a fair point.
(01:13:06):
We made a hole.
I wouldn't want to leave the citizens completely unprotected.
Maybe I could take a small band of knights to try to get the other wall.
Agreed.
I think you should rest.
Oh, we're pretty rested.
I'm not.
They've been resting for three days.
We don't have time to rest anymore.
It's time to act.
(01:13:28):
Sorry, but I want to go to the prison.
There is another option.
There are catacombs that allegedly lead underneath the sea to the great lighthouse itself.
I don't know what shape they're in after the destruction, but walking to where Bolton
might be is a possibility.
Not a guarantee.
(01:13:48):
So the catacombs lead up to the lighthouse.
They're said to, but it's not a massive amaze as you were just in.
Why can't you just put us in the lighthouse?
Like I said, Bolton's presence there is unholy.
All right.
So we got to shore.
We have the light, uh, you know, catacombs to the lighthouse and then we got to prison
(01:14:12):
and we have get the fuck out of here.
I say we go to the blisters and then, uh, shoot the lighthouse.
Okay.
I love the lighthouse, but I mean, if he's in there, that's a good idea.
It could be rebuilt.
So no more retreat.
That's already going to have to be.
All right.
I agree with the gnome.
To the blisters.
All right.
Blisters.
To the prison.
(01:14:32):
Can you set us in the, yeah.
Okay.
Yes.
Well, would you?
So I guess I'll leave a small band to the other one.
We could try to retake both walls.
We had all those defenses.
We could very much, very much draw their attention and even destroy some of the fleet.
Fuck yeah.
We also bring a dragon.
(01:14:53):
You have a dragon.
We have a dragon.
Well, he's a baby dragon at this point, but I'm sure he can still do some damage.
You might be confused hearing earlier that we were lovers and now there's a baby dragon.
I'll cover.
I didn't think it was possible.
That's I'll cover.
Don't hurt his feelings.
Oh, it's a tiny sand.
(01:15:14):
You just have an ornament, right?
Sand, sand dragon, yes.
Okay.
Everyone's a critic.
This is its mother.
All right.
Well.
Are you not its mother?
Are you heading there right now?
Yes.
Yes.
Why not?
Yes.
As soon as this phone call ends.
Well, then we'll head out.
Got to take a leak first.
Well, good luck.
(01:15:35):
Goodbye.
We'll all die right now or we'll save the city.
Hmm.
All right.
Blessings of Yumi be upon you.
Yes.
How about like hangs up the phone?
Oh, sure.
God's name is Gimli.
You mean.
Why do you don't think there's a there's a Gimli is no Gimli never heard of it.
(01:15:55):
That's a dwarf.
Damn.
Up in the mountains.
Cool guys.
So we go on.
Let's do it.
Absolutely.
Cue the music.
Put some free bread on.
Yes.
All right, then.
Well, good luck.
I suppose you want to head there right now.
(01:16:18):
Can we heal?
I don't know if you have time.
We have time.
Oh, damn.
All right.
Actually, you know what?
We can.
We can.
Absolutely.
We have to.
It sucks to be them.
What the hell was that?
How injured are you right now?
I like to use.
Pretty bad.
(01:16:39):
Even after you.
Yeah, I only got 15.
Even after all that, I was down to a seven.
Yeah.
Well, that dragon.
Well, if you want to give me your healers kit, I can use one.
You saw.
OK, fine.
Can just maybe see.
(01:17:00):
Can just drink some water.
He'll.
Yeah, take some water out of this punch.
He's poor water out.
Actually will put my head down.
It's.
Whoa.
It is some tasty water.
That does work.
What's your dragon day?
Six.
Holy crap.
So you will heal for.
What's your intelligence?
Oh, so you heal for 10 more.
(01:17:24):
Thank you.
So is it 3D six or 3D six plus con?
3D six.
Oh, all right.
All right.
That's 10 more.
Yeah, you just call back your magical water to your hand and a little cupful and heals
you right up like a healing potion.
(01:17:45):
All right.
That's fucking good shit.
I didn't want to use my last one in case one of you need it later.
You could just use her Bella's healing.
Well, the healing kit would be to heal everybody else.
Well, I have two healing kids.
Right.
If you're ready to go, I'll send you on your way.
(01:18:06):
Would you like to be?
I'll see what I can do.
Can you put us on the wall?
I'd like to be in the ballista in the ballista.
We're firing the mage.
We're fighting far the dragon, far the dragon.
I like him.
I don't want to be in.
Or do we need to work from the the guard's office?
(01:18:28):
Can we do like the guard's office and then work for them?
I don't think we have a choice.
Why not?
I rolled two sixes and a five with six on the dragon.
All right.
So we have.
So you guys have any choice you'd like?
(01:18:48):
Where would you like to be?
Let's think about this.
Yeah, we must really think about we go directly into our list.
Are we still on the phone?
No, you're not the phone shit because we go directly into that compound.
Yeah, we could be hit with a surprise attack.
I think we should go outside.
I think we have to be the surprise attack.
I mean, but we don't know.
(01:19:10):
It's yeah, but they don't know the secrets.
Well, who cares?
Who the hell has been?
It's a fortress.
I'm sorry.
It's a fortress.
We go inside.
We don't penetrate the fortress.
You know what?
I mean, if you guys are like behind enemy lines, like that's how to get fortresses.
So that's what I'm saying.
I like this dragon guy.
What about into the main office?
(01:19:31):
Thank you.
The Knights Templar, you know, room thing.
I wonder if there's weapons in there or people just kick the shit out of that too.
We've really thinned numbers.
And that's also where the intercom would be.
So that's like on the lower level.
Blisters are higher up.
Are on the top.
You know what?
We have to make our way up.
(01:19:52):
They are the walls themselves stand about six stories.
So they're pretty tall.
I don't know.
It sounds like a cool weapon.
I haven't fired one.
I kind of want to try.
When I say anywhere, you could literally appear right on top next to the blisters.
Yeah, they fight our way.
All right.
(01:20:13):
I guess let's do it right next to the blisters.
You know what?
I have a great idea for your new shell.
You can actually drown someone in it.
Like a pigeon.
It's supposed to be a seagull.
That's right.
I'm sorry about the old adage.
I always forget.
I was thinking you just do some like water torture on people.
Oh, waterboarding.
Yeah.
Damn.
(01:20:34):
He was an assassin.
Holy shit.
That's some dirty halfling tricks.
Well I did learn from the mob boss.
So next to the blisters?
Next to the blisters.
Yes.
All right.
I'll do what I can.
Thank you.
Everyone quick.
Did you just really just kiss the maid?
(01:20:54):
Yeah.
The mermaid takes your kiss.
The wall kind of opens.
How did you do that?
Water flows out.
Yes.
Bye, Argonne.
Goodbye.
Is it taking all of us one by one?
And you guys just down.
Wait, my shoe.
And you're in blackness.
Why you keep losing all your shoes?
I don't know.
I need to get laces.
(01:21:14):
And then next thing you know, you're going to have to get a new one.
And then you're standing and you're outside and you're on top of this wall.
Thank you for listening on your magical devices and thanks for listening to Adventure Nights.
(01:21:36):
Specifically, if you like what you hear, please leave a review or a comment.
Tell your friends about us if you can.
And if you want to learn more, head to Adventure Nights pod on Facebook.
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