Backpack Heist, Forgotten Manners, Gen X Survival and the Modern Parenting Crisis

A stolen wallet at a Boston hospital becomes the unlikely catalyst for a fascinating journey through generational divides in parenting, discipline, and workplace ethics. When Cynthia shares her experience of having cash taken from her Mickey Mouse backpack at work, it opens a floodgate of stories about security violations, boundaries, and how our sense of safety has evolved over time.

Rick's tale of his mother's stolen documents sparks an impassioned conversation about the consequences we face when our personal spaces are invaded. But it's the exploration of parenting styles that truly ignites the group. From Maurio hiding books in his pajamas to avoid his mother's discipline, to Alma withholding a Nintendo DS until a child's birthday to teach accountability, these authentic Gen X experiences paint a vivid contrast to modern parenting approaches.

The hosts don't just reminisce—they critically examine how childhood discipline practices shape workplace behaviors. Is there a connection between participation trophies and the entitlement seen in today's professional environments? Why do some younger workers struggle with basic organizational skills and accountability? The conversation doesn't villainize any generation but instead questions where the balance lies between emotional intelligence and personal responsibility.

Perhaps most nostalgically, the group reflects on their "latchkey kid" experiences—the freedom of unsupervised afternoons, drinking from garden hoses, and playing at arcades until dark. These moments of independence fostered resilience that many feel is missing in today's carefully scheduled childhoods.

Whether you're nodding along with familiar experiences or gaining insight into generational perspectives different from your own, this episode offers a thought-provoking examination of how we raise children, build character, and shape future workplaces. Subscribe now to join more authentic conversations that bridge generational divides while celebrating what makes each uniquely valuable.

Thank you for stopping by. Please visit our website: All About The Joy and add, like and share. You can also support us by shopping at our STORE - We'd appreciate that greatly. Also, if you want to find us anywhere on social media, please check out the link in bio page.

Music By Geovane Bruno, Moments, 3481
Editing by Team A-J
Host, Carmen Lezeth


DISCLAIMER: As always, please do your own research and understand that the opinions in this podcast and livestream are meant for entertainment purposes only. States and other areas may have different rules and regulations governing certain aspects discussed in this podcast. Nothing in our podcast or livestream is meant to be medical or legal advice. Please use common sense, and when in doubt, ask a professional for advice, assistance, help and guidance.

Episode Transcript

Carmen Lezeth (00:00):
Hey everyone, welcome to All About the Joy.
This is Carmen Lisette, yourhost.
We get right into theconversation.
So let me tell you who is inthe house.
It is Cynthia Lopez, it is RickCosta, it is Mario Dawson and
his better half, alma Dawson.
Welcome to the Private Lounge sojust to recap um, in the green

(00:32):
room we were having aconversation because Cynthia's
had a really bad mother effingweek, um, and a really bad day.
Um, she was continuing thestory and so I started off the
show with us just continuing on.
So we're gonna let her vent andthen we're gonna be in
happiness mode, we're gonna letit out, but basically, we do a
little recap.
You got money stolen from youtoday at your office.
We're trying to figure out.

(00:52):
We I'm all in the investigationnow.
Uh, the cops are involved inher office.
Somebody came in and was in thehallway.
That seemed somebody that mightbe a courier or a messenger or
something, so no one thoughtanything of it.
But now they're realizing thatthis person might be an oddity,
but they stole stuff out of herwallet.

(01:12):
It was a big to do I know.
Okay, cynthia, I'm sorry, Ijust want to give them a recap.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (01:18):
Yeah, that's pretty much that.
That was just today.
That was today, monday.
Of course they started with thelayoffs um, I'm okay, my job's
okay, thankfully, um, but acouple of my co-workers will let
go, and it was just the waythat they did.
It was just really kind ofmessed up, I think.
How did they do it?
So they didn't even wait tilllike the end of the day or like

(01:42):
even tell them before they camein.
No, they waited till likeeverybody was in their offices,
everyone was there, and it waslike 1030, 11 o'clock was like
they pulled this person into theoffice and like 10, 15 minutes
later, the person comes backinto the office crying and she's
like today's my last day, likein front of of, in front of

(02:06):
other people, and it's just likeokay, this is not the way you
do things, like you justembarrassing this poor person
who's been there for 36 yearstoo oh yeah is this the person
that you don't like, though?
not that I don't like her.

Carmen Lezeth (02:25):
she's was the older person that we were.
Okay, but still it's the waythey did it.
But it wasn't just her.
You said there were massivelayoffs right At the hospital.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (02:32):
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, absolutely.
And in our department therewere three, in my sister's
department there were 20.
Oh yeah, yeah, all on the sameday day, and it was just bad.
Yeah and yeah, and it's justbeen crazy.

(02:53):
And I've been doing some work,so much work.
I'm doing the work of likethree or four people right now.
So, and then for this to happentoday and it's not even friday
the 13th, it's thursday the 13th, like, and this happened today
I'm like I am, I'm, I'm justreally sorry.

Carmen Lezeth (03:13):
I just I don't.
Even I was gonna cancel todaybecause she responded in the
email, you know, when I sent outthe link or whatever, and I was
thinking about canceling, andthen I was, but she said she
wants to talk about it on theshow and I'm like.
So I was a little confused.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (03:28):
I just needed to vent a little, but I
needed some joy.
I need some good stuff tohappen, you know.

Carmen Lezeth (03:37):
I'd get up and tap dance for you, but I don't
think that'll work.

Maurio Dawson (03:40):
Go for it.

Carmen Lezeth (03:52):
Well, so they're doing an investigation.
They think they might know whoit might be.
It might be the gentleman thatthey everyone thought was a
messenger or whatever, um, andthat person might have ties to
someone else in the office yes,I mean, it definitely seemed
like it was kind of a a personwho knew exactly where to go.
Well, that's what I would say,okay, cause you know what.
They went into her backpack andthey only took cash.

(04:12):
Now, I'm sorry, I grew up inthe hood.
We wouldn't just risk all thatfor cash.
I would have taken your creditcards, I would have taken some
other stuff, whatever littlethings you had on.

(04:33):
Then you have a lot of disneystuff on your desk, huh, yeah,
yeah, like I just uh, it wasjust the cash, yeah, so they
just it's just a weird thing.

Alma Dawsom (04:36):
So I mean, either way, it sucks.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (04:37):
I'm so sorry , rick, how are you doing like
targeted, like they knew, likeyou said, they knew where to go,
they knew and it's not like,like I don't really talk to that
many people in my, in mydepartment anyways, and you know
what I mean.
It's like I have a mickey mouseeverybody I know right, I have
like a mickey mouse backpack.
You know what I'm saying.
Like I look like a school kidwhen I walk in the office, so

(04:59):
that's why I think nobody knew.

Carmen Lezeth (05:01):
that's why I'm like they just took cash first
of all.
That's why I was being so meanto you in the green room.
I mean, I wasn't really, but Iwas like why do you have a
thousand dollars of cash?
No, who carries a thousanddollars of cash?

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (05:13):
I'm just saying that's why I was like
nobody would know that thatyou're carrying cash.
That's the thing.
No one knows that I carry cash.

Maurio Dawson (05:20):
Everyone knows now.

Carmen Lezeth (05:26):
Well, we cash because everyone knows now what
we know now.
So, yeah, you need to invest inzell and venmo.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (05:28):
Seriously, all of you?
Yeah, no, I usually do, andthat's the thing.
And it's like I happen to havecash.
This time, because I usuallyonly use my card I happen to
have cash um on me because, um,someone I had lent money to had
just paid me back and I wasgoing to deposit it because they
didn't have zell, whatever.
And I was going to deposit itbecause they didn't have Zelle
or whatever.
And I was going to deposit itright after work, thinking, you

(05:48):
know, I'm in the office, I'm ina secure place, you know no one
comes and bothers me, butnowhere safe apparently Tell the
truth.

Maurio Dawson (05:56):
You know you're a gamer.
Go to strip club.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (05:58):
Yeah, officer.

Carmen Lezeth (06:03):
It was all singles.
I don't know they paid me backin singles.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (06:13):
It's not even the fact that they stole
the money, it's just a securitything.
You know what?

Alma Dawsom (06:17):
I mean Like you don't feel safe, exactly.

Maurio Dawson (06:20):
Yeah.

Alma Dawsom (06:21):
Exactly that I was going to say.
It's that part of it.
They violated your space,really your safe space.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (06:30):
Where I sit.
It's like you literally, whenyou come in the office, you
literally have to go aroundanother desk to even find my
desk.
That's why I feel like somebodyknew something.

Maurio Dawson (06:43):
Or saw something.
Right yeah, and you guys don'thave cameras in the offices.

Carmen Lezeth (06:47):
Oh no, the Boston police are in the building when
you walk in.
Oh yeah, Exactly.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (06:53):
I don't know what that means.
They were very bold.
And where my desk is literallythe doctor's office is right
next to me.
His door is always open, soit's like this person had some
serious balls, because you don'tknow if he's sitting in there.
There's another office next andthe door is closed.
You don't know if anybody'sbehind that door.
You're taking a chance.

Carmen Lezeth (07:14):
I think the person does.
They've cased the place.
We're like, do do do They'vebeen there before.
They know something, becausethat don't make no sense.
Why would you go to a.
Mickey Mouse book bag.
Right, you can think about that.

Maurio Dawson (07:29):
Well, you know what I got robbed in Boston, so
I'm sorry.
I feel like I got robbed in.

Carmen Lezeth (07:39):
Boston.

Maurio Dawson (07:39):
In the mall.

Carmen Lezeth (07:40):
In the mall All of a sudden.

Maurio Dawson (07:43):
It's Boston, it's all Boston.

Carmen Lezeth (07:45):
Sorry, come on LA .
Go ahead ahead, rick.
What were you gonna say I?

Rick Costa (07:49):
was joking, I was gonna say I was waiting for that
.
My house was broken into.
Um, this was years ago.
Mom was still lucid, she haddementia and I I wasn't home and
she wasn't home.
She was visiting my dad in anursing home.
I was bringing my son back tohis mom's house like 45 minutes

(08:14):
away, and I had just dropped himoff.
And then I'm getting a callfrom my mom and a good portion
of that road there's noreception.
And she called me right beforethe reception cut off and all I
got was we just got robbed.
We just got robbed and I waslike what, ma, ma, ma, reception

(08:35):
going.
I hit the gas, I didn't care,cops, nothing, because I'm
thinking she was in the house,right, I didn't know what to
think, so I jet and she was inthe house.
Right, they're going to dosomething to her.
I didn't know what to think so,I jet.
And then she was like oh no, Iwas with your dad.
I was like you could have toldme that.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (08:52):
But, you got the cops right behind you.

Alma Dawsom (08:56):
Yeah.

Rick Costa (08:56):
But what they did was they took a rock and smashed
a window and then just reachedin and unlocked the door and we
even have a dog he did nothing.

Carmen Lezeth (09:06):
He's so friendly.
So much pressure on the puppies.
I'm just telling you they'renot all gargoyles.
You did nothing.
You did nothing little Pepe.

Rick Costa (09:18):
The worst part was she had put in a locked box not
jewelry cash, no, her passport,her American citizenship papers
all like legal documents and ofcourse there's going to be some
money there's, yeah.
Now we have.
We have none of that.
I called to find out how muchwas.

(09:39):
Before you get a passport yougot to prove your American
citizenship for her or whatever.
And I said how much does itcost?
Because obviously it's going tocost something with the
government.
So I said how much does it costto get a copy of that?
She said, oh, it'll be about$600.
I said, excuse me, whoa.

Carmen Lezeth (09:57):
Wait, wait, wait.
$600 for what For a passport?
That's not right.

Alma Dawsom (10:00):
No no, no, it's a naturalization document.

Rick Costa (10:03):
A naturalization document.

Carmen Lezeth (10:04):
Oh yeah, that I can't help you with.

Rick Costa (10:05):
So I said hold on.
You're telling me a piece ofpaper not made out of gold costs
$600?
.
I made it repeat it five timesso I couldn't believe it.
I was like $600 for a piece ofpaper.
So yeah, we still have it.

Carmen Lezeth (10:19):
Is that because it's from Portugal?
Is it because you have to go toPortugal to get it?

Rick Costa (10:24):
Well, I mean she's an American citizen, right.
Really, she did all thatprocess.
My dad did too, but they stolethat.
So to renew the passport,that's one of the things she
needs, because she wasn't bornhere and so no passport, no,
nothing, so yeah.

Alma Dawsom (10:46):
But we ain't going nowhere anyway so we don't care
anymore, but at the time it waslike mom, why did you do that?
When you become an Americancitizen, they give you a
certificate, like with yourpicture, your naturalization
number, all of that.
So then you need thatcertificate in order to get your
passport.
So then that's what you weretrying to replace.
Was that actual certificate$600.
That's what you were trying toreplace.
Was that actual certificate$600.

Rick Costa (11:08):
That's insane.

Carmen Lezeth (11:10):
That's a lot of money.

Rick Costa (11:12):
I was having a heart attack, driving in the car
thinking you don't, I didn'tcare about stolen, I didn't care
about my mom.
Did they do something?

Maurio Dawson (11:20):
That's it.
Like they say, things can bereplaced, people can't.

Carmen Lezeth (11:28):
Well, clearly not for $600.
I'm just saying it's a lot ofmoney.
I mean they can be replaced,but it's like $600.
That's a lot of money.

Rick Costa (11:38):
It's a huge violation and it takes a while
to get over that, to be honestwith you, really tough.

Maurio Dawson (11:46):
But you're going to be alright.
Juan's going to walk you towork every day.
He's going to sit by you.
He's going to look over yourshoulder, look at she laughing.

Carmen Lezeth (11:58):
He ain't going nowhere.

Rick Costa (11:59):
Carmen wins the lottery and none of us can't
work my money no more.

Maurio Dawson (12:02):
Right, carmen wins the lottery and gives Rick
a day off.

Carmen Lezeth (12:05):
It's going to be, great, I said half a day, let's
keep going Half a day.

Maurio Dawson (12:13):
Damn, you got twice and a half Rick.

Rick Costa (12:16):
Day.
It's going to work somewhere.
Talk about it.
I got to shut up.

Carmen Lezeth (12:24):
Yeah, you know, I don't have an have an
experience I mean, knock on woodright now of anything being
stolen from me.
Um, you know, but we've allbeen violated in very different
ways and, like it, it is yourpersonal space and your safety
that becomes the thing to getused to again.
Um, you don't feel safe, youknow, and it doesn't matter what

(12:47):
you do to protect yourself,right, because sometimes you
can't see it coming you know,but you will get there again.
Oh, no, no, no, you will.
I mean you will, especiallybecause you're going to and I
hate to say it this way becauseit sounds like I'm blaming the
victim and I'm not but what arewe never going to do again?
We already know one of thethings we're never going to do

(13:09):
again is have a thousand dollarsin our backpack, like you're
never going to do that again, Ipromise you.

Maurio Dawson (13:14):
you know what I mean.
Can you sell me?

Carmen Lezeth (13:17):
and if people can't sell you like, okay, I'm
not going to keep harping on themoney thing, but that's one of
the things you.
You know what I mean Likethings that I don't do anymore
is I do not walk anywhere bymyself at night.
It just doesn't matter.
You know what I mean Like.
I do not Like.
I used to do that as a kid allthe time.
I would walk from Forbes Streetto Rosemary Street one o'clock

(13:39):
in the morning and have no carein the world, not a care in the
world, not a caring what whattwo, what is?
it two miles, two and a halfmiles.
Yeah, I would walk as a kid andthen I learned a very valuable
lesson never to do that again.
You know what I mean.
And and from that to in what?
Was I 14 when all that happened?
Um, I, when it's night time out, I don't care if I'm at a party

(14:02):
, if I'm, like at a guest houseor whatever somebody's home and
whatever, and we're having aparty and I have to walk to my
car, I will ask someone to walkme to my car, and I don't care
if it's across the street.
You know what I mean.
And again, that whole bougie.
God, I'm so bougie.
It's just right there, thankyou, thank you, I'm bougie.
I need to be walked to my car,thank you, I mean I was raised

(14:23):
that that's a gentlemanly thingto do anyway.
You started with.
I was raised you know what Imean Like um, but that kind of
segues into kind of thedifferences from being raised
Gen X to how children are beingraised today.
Not to get into the wholeparenting thing, but just the

(14:44):
whole Gen X thing.
There are just things we did askids that you don't do today.
You know what I mean, and Iheard somebody the other day get
upset because somebody held thedoor open for her.
She turned around.
She's like you don't need tohold the door and I was like one
of the guys at work held thedoor open for a woman and she
was upset about it and I had topull her over.

(15:07):
She was a potential client,which I hope they don't take her
on as a client whatever, butshe wasn't a client for me
because that would have beendone.
My boss was meeting her and shewas incensed that a man would
think that she'd want the dooropen for her.
It was interesting and it's adifferent generation.

(15:31):
I think that's weird, but it'salso just different ideas of
what like she thought of.
Like she was I don't know weakor I don't even know what she
was thinking like.
Why would you get upset aboutthat?

Maurio Dawson (15:41):
I can't explain that one.
I have no.
I have no words for that,because it's just, it's a.
It's an words for that becauseit's just an act of kindness.

Carmen Lezeth (15:50):
And it's manners, it's just good manners, you
know what.

Maurio Dawson (15:54):
I'm sorry, these young people, they really in
general do not have mannersperiod.

Carmen Lezeth (16:00):
Do you guys believe that?
Yes?

Maurio Dawson (16:03):
I mean because even with our daughter, we have
taught her manners, so she isnot the norm.
Let's just say it like that.
She's the exception, not thenorm.
You know, please, and thank you, go a long way and a lot of
these kids forget to say it now,or may I?

(16:23):
Or excuse me, excuse me.

Alma Dawsom (16:26):
That part.

Carmen Lezeth (16:28):
I can't tell you how?
Many times people just likewalk in front of me or like rub
my shoulder, like not rub, pushmy shoulder.
I'll say it, Excuse me.

Alma Dawsom (16:40):
At the happiest place on Earth.
I will stand right there andpeople are coming and I will
stand and look at them.
Then they finally catch a clueand they'll go around.
I'm not loving it.

Carmen Lezeth (16:55):
You're talking about Disney?
Isn't that like the capital?

Maurio Dawson (16:58):
of the continent.
People are rude.
People are people everywhere.

Alma Dawsom (17:02):
Oh yeah.

Maurio Dawson (17:04):
Do you think people are?

Carmen Lezeth (17:05):
more rude now than they were back in the day.

Maurio Dawson (17:07):
No, no, people are rude.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (17:09):
That's about the same.

Maurio Dawson (17:12):
No, that part I won't.
It's still the same.
A-holes are A-holes.

Alma Dawsom (17:17):
It's a different.
I'll say it's a different kindof rude they're so rude.

Carmen Lezeth (17:24):
People are rude.
Someone're so rude.
Yeah, I think people are rude.
People will call someone calledme out the other day because I
used the wrong pronoun.
I think I told you guys thisbefore.
Oh yeah, I used the wrongpronoun and they were like
incensed by it.
Like incensed.
I was like I was like Iapologize, I did not know that
they go by they them.
You know, I apologize.
I did not know that they go bythey them.

(17:44):
I kept saying he, I didn't know, how am I supposed to know.
I don't know how I'm supposedto know, but I guess you're not
supposed to assume.
Oh my God.

Rick Costa (17:54):
I don't know.
I was going to ask Alma,because you work with kids.
You see how they act, do youthink?

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (18:02):
Look at her face.

Rick Costa (18:04):
Manny's all decreased.
Yes, most definitely how theyact.
Look at her face, manners aredecreased?

Alma Dawsom (18:08):
Yes, most definitely.
But see, if you come into myspace, you're going to have
manners or you will not getserved, basically, so you walk
in.
It's a good morning, it's hello, it's please, it's thank you,
and we start that the minutethey walk through the door.
Not all of this, you know.
Oh, can I have nope, and I'llstand there and they'll, and

(18:33):
they finally oh, good morning,oh, good morning today you know,
it's just one of those whereit's like no, no, you know so no
definitely.
And then you know, definitelyran into some you know parental
figures who are like they don'thave to speak, they don't have
to, and I'm like well.

Carmen Lezeth (18:55):
I'm sorry, People without children.

Maurio Dawson (18:58):
I don't know what that means?

Carmen Lezeth (19:00):
What do you mean?
They don't have to speak.
Who don't have to speak?

Alma Dawsom (19:03):
They don't have to greet.

Maurio Dawson (19:04):
The child does not.

Alma Dawsom (19:06):
They don't have to greet anyone, they don't have to
say To who?
To anyone?

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (19:12):
So the parents are not teaching the kid
manners, they're not teachingthem to say good morning.

Carmen Lezeth (19:17):
Yeah, okay, wait, wait, wait.
I need more information.

Alma Dawsom (19:22):
So parents come into the school.
The parent comes into theschool to meet with you, yes,
and to say, oh, I, I, um.
My kid came and said that youmade them say hello, yes, I did,
I did okay, no are you beingfunny?

Carmen Lezeth (19:41):
no, I'm not being .
No, I'm not being funny?

Alma Dawsom (19:43):
No, I'm not being funny.
Yes, I did.
No, not you.

Carmen Lezeth (19:49):
I know you did.
I'm saying the parents came into tell you that the child said
that you made them say goodmorning and hello and that was a
problem.

Alma Dawsom (20:00):
Yes, oh hell to the no.
There's no way.
Yes, oh, hell to the no,there's no way.

Carmen Lezeth (20:11):
These are the types of things that we're
dealing with in the schoolsetting now.
Yes, those types of things.
I am shooketh.
I swear to God, I am shooketh.

Alma Dawsom (20:18):
It's because it's kids having kids.

Maurio Dawson (20:21):
That part.

Alma Dawsom (20:22):
Yes.

Maurio Dawson (20:23):
And so you are still.
We have millennials now havingkids who are Gen Zers, who are
now teaching the millennials nottheir entitlement, which is now
passing down to these children.

Alma Dawsom (20:35):
Yeah, they have no social skills and they're
teaching their children.

Maurio Dawson (20:39):
No social skills.

Carmen Lezeth (20:41):
Wow, the respect for elders to me was just not
even.
I don't even remember learningit.
It's like you were born knowingyou better respect your elders
and you will say good morningand ma'am and sir, and well, I
don't think we said, and I'mgonna say this um, it's very for
me, for me, for me.

Alma Dawsom (21:03):
We said Doña, but what I'm saying is that it's
very, very cultural For me.
A lot of those lines are verycultural and I can tell when
it's, let's say, latino familieswho are born here or Latino

(21:27):
families who are immigrants.

Carmen Lezeth (21:30):
So let me guess the ones who are immigrants are
all okay and their children arewell-mannered.

Alma Dawsom (21:37):
And they still respect the authority of the
teacher.
If the teacher says I'm goingto call your mom, oh, those kids
are like besides themselves,like no sorry, yes.
And the generations like myselfwho were born here and now have
there, that that level ofrespect, that level of you know

(21:59):
is not, is no longer.

Carmen Lezeth (22:01):
It's very American to be.
I don't know what it is and youknow I'm not a parent, it's
just what I see.
This thing about being friendswith your children seems to be a
very common American thing.
Like it don't matter what agethey are.
Like we're going to negotiateand we're going to have a
conversation about why you stolethat piece of candy when I told

(22:25):
you you couldn't have it.

Alma Dawsom (22:28):
And I'm like no, back in.
And you're gonna go and you'regonna tell them I'm so sorry, I
took this and you're, you knowit's like no, I'm not gonna let
you take it with you.
No, we're gonna go back in.
We're not having a conversation.
I told you'll be fine, youcannot have this and you're
gonna march yourself back andyou're gonna go put it back.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (22:49):
Do you ever get the ones that are like I'm
sorry I took this, but can Istill have it?
No, You're not sorry, are you?

Carmen Lezeth (23:03):
I don't get that whole thing.
I don't remember.
I know you guys are going tolaugh, but I really was a very
quiet kind of shy kid, exceptwhen it came to performing.
I know you guys are going tolaugh, but I really was a very
quiet kind of shy kid, exceptwhen it came to performing.
I just you know what I mean.
I know, I know it's incredible,it's true, I was lovely.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (23:22):
I know you were.

Carmen Lezeth (23:25):
No no, it's true, I was a pretty quiet kid
because I was always out ofsorts, right, I was always out
of place.
I was always um.
This is after my mother died,but even before I mean I was
really young, even before I wasjust, you know, I was a good kid
, but I don't ever.
I was afraid of adults.
I was afraid of getting eitherhit or dismissed or pushed away

(23:49):
or whatever Cause.
You always wanted your, yourparents and your elders to be
proud of you, to think well ofyou to.
You know what I mean.
So, but now I feel like kidshave a weird resentment towards
their parents.
I don't know if resentment'sthe right word, but, like some,
it's weird.
It's just a weird dynamic.

Alma Dawsom (24:08):
I think that I understand what you're saying,
but I think that you know howthey say you go to extremes.
I think that we've taught this,this younger generation, to
love themselves and that onlytheir opinion matters and only
what they think of themselvesmatters.
And so then you know, andthey've invalidated that

(24:31):
external need for validation.
I'll say it, but it really so.
I understand that part of it.
You're not going to base yourvalue on external validation,
but it's not.
But it's like the respect wentout the window along.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (24:47):
It's like it becomes.
It has now become anentitlement.
Exactly, exactly.

Rick Costa (24:52):
I saw a really funny video of and I'm sure every
culture probably has theirversion of it, but it was
American versus Portugueseparents, and so the father
coming into the kid's room,American first.
Hey honey, dinner's ready.
Come on, let's go eat.
We're going to go eat now.
I made your favorite spaghettiand meatballs.
Oh, you don't like spaghettiand meatballs.

(25:16):
Oh, I'm sorry, what do you want?
What do you want?
Um, oh, you want chinese.
Sure, I'll order around, no,problem.
Then it switches to portuguese.
Hey, stop playing that stupidgame.
Come on, we're gonna eat whatyou mean, what we're gonna eat,
no matter what you want, if youdon't want to eat it, then you
ain't gonna eat nothing.

Maurio Dawson (25:26):
Come on, let's go , that's right that's that,
that's cultural too, becausethat's us too.
But I was telling when you guyswere talking I was thinking
about my mother would always sayshe could tell the difference
between a city child and aSouthern child and how they were

(25:47):
raised and their manners.
And you would always.
My mother says she can alwayslook at someone and say, oh,
their parents are from the South.
I said how do you know that,Because that mom will put them
in check right there on the spotand they say yes, ma'am, and no
ma'am, and they say please andthank you, and they get up and
open the door or they'll get upand do something.

(26:08):
My mother says it all the time,but even culturally.
She said, but I said, mom,they're from Chicago.
Yeah, but I bet you their mamawas from Arkansas.

Carmen Lezeth (26:19):
See, I've heard it differently.
I've heard you can always tella rich kid or a poor kid, right,
poor kids are alwayswell-mannered.
At least back in the day, whenwe were growing up, you know
what I mean, like poor kidsalways had good manners when
they were outside of their ownarea, especially messing around,
we didn't have nothing.
And I mean I remember we had towear a uniform to go to school

(26:42):
and we and I only had one whiteshirt and one uniform jumper.
Remember Cynthia?
Oh my God, yeah, it's thoseugly things, ugly, ugly cat
school girl, plaid crap thingsor whatever, and we would have
to wash it and then the moreit'd still be wet and my mother
would make us iron it so youcould kind of get it dry, it, to

(27:02):
dry it out, and it'd still bekind of
damp but it'd have that nicelittle crease in the white right
there.
You know what I mean.
It was chilly but it was cleanand you were proper, you know,
and that's yeah.
So it's kind of the same thing,the whole south thing on and
city kid, but it's also, uh,poor kids, at least where I was
going up, we had manners.

(27:23):
Yeah, you would get the chunkman, you would get it upside the
head like well, now I need youto go in the sit out or what do
they call it.
Go sit in the time out, timeout, I know, but my friends
would be like I was on a timeout, a time out.
I would have been grateful fora motherfucking time out.

(27:43):
Are you kidding me.
I had to go to my room and read,okay go to your room.

Rick Costa (27:49):
Thank you, I would have been so.

Carmen Lezeth (27:51):
I used to love when my friends are like Okay,
thank you.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (27:53):
I would have been.
I used to love when my friendsare like oh sorry, I can't go
out, I'm grounded.
I was like what does groundedmean?
I didn't know what grounded was.
If you did something bad, youwere getting spanked, or like
getting something taken away.
I got both.
You have both yeah.
I got both.

Carmen Lezeth (28:15):
Yeah, I never got hit.
I only only got hit once.
It wasn't about my mother, but,um, but my mother would do that
.
Look, and that's what I'msaying a disappointment, but
like the fierce like.
And you knew you were introuble, you know, you knew you
did something bad and your wholeshoulders would just like this
you'd be, be like you would justfeel horrible and there was
none of this stuff.

(28:35):
Like a day later Cause Iremember watching the Huxtables
right, the Cosby show being likeI wish it was like that what I
said a day later, please no, no,I'm just saying do you remember
like watching the cosby showand like they would get mad at
the kids or whatever, and thenthey would go and have a

(28:56):
conversation of what they didwrong and did you learn your
list and blah, blah.
That'd be like I wish it waslike that.
No, it'd be like a day later,you still be in trouble.
A day later, you still feellike shit.
You know what I mean.
A day later, and you, your momwould never come.
My mother would never come upand give me a hug and be like
it's okay, baby, I understandNever that never happened.

Alma Dawsom (29:18):
So I will say that I was a combination of both.
I definitely got, I definitelygot her.
I mean, she'll tell you herself, I got her.
I mean she'll tell you herself,I got her we got her who.
Our daughter.
She definitely got spanked,Definitely got spanked.

(29:40):
I think the favorite thing thatwe ever did was one time she
wanted that DS, you know thathandheld Nintendo.
Oh, she wanted it bad for herbirthday, she wanted it.
Oh, my birthday, she wanted it,oh, my goodness.
So we did it.
We got it.
We got it for her.
No, we got it for Christmas.

Rick Costa (29:57):
It was Christmas time.
It was supposed to be Christmas.
We got it for.

Maurio Dawson (29:59):
Christmas.

Alma Dawsom (30:02):
And it was three stories.
So it was the landing.
She would slide down the stairs.
And we told her you need tostop because you're going to
hurt yourself.
You need to stop because you'regoing to hurt yourself.
So then one time she slid andshe went head first and hit the
wall.
I mean like she hit the wall.

Maurio Dawson (30:22):
And put a dent in the wall.

Alma Dawsom (30:23):
And oh, I lost it.
Of course she was hurt.
I hurt her some more.
She was, she was.
We had to take her to thedoctor.
You know the whole nine of them.
This was maybe a week beforeChristmas.
So then Christmas came and sheopened up her gift and it was

(30:44):
the DS right the box.
But inside was a note fromSanta that said oh, I heard that
you weren't behaving well andthat you hurt yourself on the
wall, so we're going to see howyou're doing by your birthday
and you might get your gift then.
Oh, sure.

Rick Costa (31:01):
Her birthday is in May oh that's awesome.

Alma Dawsom (31:08):
So then she was I mean, she lost it, of course
crying, and then we sat down andwe said well, do you know why
that happened?
Yes, you know, and she was ableto explain why it happened
earlier, though you didn't waittill May, did you?
No, yes, we did we wanted onher birthday we are cold bloody

(31:29):
with it and that's the thing youhave to follow through.
You can do a different style ofparenting, whatever, but the
thing is you have to followthrough and not give in.
They understand, yes, why theygot in trouble.
But you don't wait a day, youget them on the spot so they
understand.
Oh, what I just did was notokay.

(31:51):
Then you explain to them why itwasn't okay.
But you don't wait a day, youget them on the spot so they
understand.
Oh, what I just did was notokay.
And then you explain to themwhy it wasn't okay.
But you don't just oh, oh, no,I know.

Carmen Lezeth (32:00):
I was talking back to their parents in the
grocery store of all ages.
I'm shook by that too.
Like kids that talk back, I'mlike.

Alma Dawsom (32:10):
And you know I'm the one, oh, you, let you let
your child talk to you like that.

Rick Costa (32:17):
I can imagine your daughter saying what did you get
for Christmas?
I got this bump on my head,exactly, exactly.

Alma Dawsom (32:26):
But see unlike us.

Maurio Dawson (32:30):
My mother would torture me, I would get in
trouble.
She's like, okay, I'm going toget you.
And so she would make me waitlike days, and like I'm sitting
there looking over my shoulder.
And so then, what she used todo, she would wait until I fell
asleep and I would snatch thecovers off and whoop my tie up

(32:50):
in my sleep, so I had nowhere togo.
So then, okay, that's mean no,I know what's going on.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (32:58):
My mom did that to me too.

Maurio Dawson (33:01):
See, I'm not the only one.

Alma Dawsom (33:02):
But, you got to wait and hear what he did.

Maurio Dawson (33:05):
This one right here.
I got in trouble.
I knew it was coming.
I was like, okay, I can't livelike this.
So every night I just startedstacking books in my clothes.
I put books like the soft books, the little foldable books.
I would put them in my clothes,in my pants, in my pajamas, and

(33:28):
I would cover up.
And so one night I knew it wascoming.
She snatched the covers off andshe's whooping my tail and I
would cover up.
And so one night I knew it wascoming.
She snatched the covers off andshe's whooping my tail and I'm
not moving.
So she's like what, get up man,get up boy.
And so she sees me all bulkedup, take off your clothes, look

(33:49):
at her falling out of my clothes.
She walked out of the room andshe had to laugh she still
laughs to this day because Ijust I couldn't, I couldn't take
my mother would.
She played mind games with me.

Alma Dawsom (34:08):
She would just like that's hard, that's's hard she
was.
But she was a single momraising a young man.

Carmen Lezeth (34:15):
No, no, no, I get it.
Look, I'm not a parent.
I am not judging nobody.
I am not a parent, I am notjudging.

Rick Costa (34:23):
I'm just saying that's hard.
I applaud your ingenuity.
Thank you, thank you.

Carmen Lezeth (34:29):
It was good.
How old were you then?

Maurio Dawson (34:31):
Eight, and then I got in trouble the next year at
nine, because I can't sayeverything I said, but I cussed
out a teacher at nine and so youknow, at a Christian school it
happened, but no, it was bad.
It's too blue for the show andso I cannot so.

(34:58):
I had to put you in the greenroom because I can't stay with
you.
And so not only did I get introuble there, that was when
they used to swat you withpaddles, because it was private
school, so I got swatted with apaddle.
Then I got home and my mothergot me again.
And then it was on my ninthbirthday, by the way, and I had

(35:22):
gotten a 10-speed bike for mybirthday which I had to sit.
She set it by the front doorand made me look at it every day
for a month.
My mother was cold, she wascold-blooded.
She would make me look at itfor a month and she said you
better not move.
I mean that tire, better notmove.

(35:42):
She marked it like the-.

Carmen Lezeth (35:44):
She marked it, that's for real.

Maurio Dawson (35:46):
I knew that was coming, she marked it and it did
not move If I touched it, if Isneezed on it, she knew.
So she was like my mother wasjust.
She was a genius with herpunishment because I never
forgot them and I never forgotthe lesson behind it, whereas

(36:07):
these parents don't do that now.
They're like, oh, sitting inthe timeout.
Did you learn your lesson?
What was the lesson?

Carmen Lezeth (36:14):
Hey, listen, I'm not advocating any, I am not a
parent.
I don't want to get no DMs.
I don't want to get no emailsYou're advocating hitting.
I'm not advocating nothing.

Maurio Dawson (36:24):
No, I'm not saying that now.

Carmen Lezeth (36:26):
Yeah, no, no, no, no.
We're just talking about backin the day how it was, and just
the differences that happened.
Today, I think there needs tobe a happy medium.
I think the biggest problem Isee as an outsider and I am
valid in being able to say this,because I do have children in
my life, so I can say this partis I don't know where that line
happened, where people thoughtit was more important to have

(36:48):
your kids like you than toparent them, and I think there
is a big confusion with that.
Like I know, when you're older,your kids become your friends
or whatever, because theyrespect you and they're adults
or whatever.
But that whole, beginning fromlike birth to like 21 or
something, needs to be you beingan adult, and that has always

(37:12):
been my problem Always.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (37:17):
No, what I was going to say was that my mom
did that to me when I wasprobably about eight or nine.
I had lied and said that I wasat the afterschool program and I
was really at my friend's housewho her house was literally
right behind the school program.
And I was really at my friend'shouse, who her house was
literally right behind theschool.
She found out.
It happened to be the one daythat she called the school to

(37:37):
ask for me to tell me that shewas gonna be home late from work
or something, and I was notthere and somehow found out that
I was at my friend's house,called my friend's house.
She answered, asked if I wasthere, she puts me on the phone,
and she said you better gethome now and I will see you when
I get home.
I flew out that house, ran home, got settled like if I was in

(38:05):
bed asleep.
Oh no, that did not.
That didn't work either.
She knew I was not asleep.
She took the covers off andbeat my ass.

Alma Dawsom (38:16):
I came in on the good part.

Carmen Lezeth (38:19):
I'll beat her ass .
That's right.
I remember your mother, so I I100% true.
I totally believe all of that.
May she rest in peace.
She was hardcore, though,because she used to beat you
guys with the cord and shit.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (38:39):
The extension cord yeah, my sisters
used to get that and I got thebrush.
I used to get the brush and thechocolate.

Maurio Dawson (38:46):
Corporate punishment is not cool.
I just want to say that.

Carmen Lezeth (38:52):
It's not, but it's a different Cultural,
different time and you know, weall turned out great, we're fine
.
I mean, I Never got hit, but Ithink there's the emotional
abuse part of Things that Ithink is kind of what I've
always said this like physicalPain is not really the problem.
It, I think, is kind of whatwhich I've always said this like
physical pain is not really theproblem.

(39:13):
It's the emotional kind ofpsychology part of it that I
think messes you up even more.
But it's also good, because youneed to know rules, you know
you need to understand things.
I mean and I get it I've neverhit a child in my life, nor
would I, because they're not mykids or whatever.
But I'm not against peopleparenting.
I'm against people parentingbadly, which seems to be the

(39:37):
norm and not the exceptionnowadays.
So, um, and I mean even kidsthat I work with, and I say kids
cause they're you know, they'reGen Z, um, I think are.
There's some parts of them thatI love I'm just trying to get my
water one minute.
There's one part of them that Ilove, um, because there's so

(40:00):
much about them Like they grewup with technology, they're not
afraid of stuff, they're verylike they have this independence
, they know, like they want towork smarter, not harder, and I
kind of love that whole idea ofyou know cause.
We're like we'll work sevendays a week, whatever we need
for our little stupid checkevery week, and they're not like
that.
They're like I'm getting paidfrom nine to five, that's all
I'm working and I will do my job.
And I love that, you know.

(40:21):
But there's that other part ofit where I just see how they
lack just things like disciplineand structure and manners.
And you know, like it's notalways about you and you don't
learn that unless it's alwaysbeen about you, right?
If it's always about you andyour household, because you were

(40:41):
the little kid, then that's howyou're going to behave in the
workplace and then get upsetwhen no one gives a shit about
what you're saying because it'sabout a team.
You know.
No one gives a shit about whatyou're saying because it's about
a team, you know.
So I see how it reflects back onthe workspace.
You know, and I have a coupleof people like they won't do
things.
I'll tell them you need to dothese four things or whatever,

(41:06):
and they'll be like all right,well, I'll get to it.
I'm like yeah, no, no, no, no,no, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm
the boss, right, and you need todo this.
And if you don't do it, this isgoing to be another reason why
when I fire your ass oh, carmen,you're so dramatic Like even

(41:28):
saying that I know they will saythat they will say God, okay,
I'll do it now.
Like these, I'm not kidding, itis, and this is the norm in the
workspace.
That's why I can tell it's badparenting, and I'm not just
blame, you know, it's theenvironment.
It's a different thing.
Like also not winning, like,okay, I'll give you an example.
Like we'll give an award, notan award, but we'll give people,
like a bonus and say you didsuch a great job, thank you so
much for working on that project.

(41:48):
We want to give you, you know,a thousand dollars.
Whatever it is, you know itdepends you know a little
percentage of what the jobprofit was, and it's not all the
time, but it's when somebodydoes something exceptional,
whatever the moping, thathappens because other people
didn't get it.
Instead of finding happinessfor that person, the moping, or
doing like a self-analysis likeoh man, next time I'm going to

(42:15):
try to do.

Maurio Dawson (42:15):
You know what I mean?
Yeah, the lack of incentive.
Yes, it's the lack of incentive, the fact that he's saying you
know what Dang they got it?
What did they do that?
I'm not doing the selfreflection, there's none of that
anymore.
And the lack of accountabilityof taking responsibility for
your ill-preparedness or yourlack of incentiveness.

Carmen Lezeth (42:43):
It's just no, that's true and and and and.
It's a fierce jealousy which Imean we've all been jealous,
right, we've all had but the,the fierce jealousy, as opposed
to it being about incentive orself-analysis or whatever it is
yeah, that part for sure, forsure.
So, wow, I didn't know we weregonna have a whole show about

(43:03):
parenting.
I love this for us.
I was not on the agenda at all.
How was your parenting, rick?
I mean, you're a dad, you're adoctor?

Rick Costa (43:17):
Oh, for my son, you mean?
I thought you meant me and mydad, because y'all already heard
that.

Carmen Lezeth (43:24):
Yeah, nothing about you.
Your son is a doctor, he's adoctor.

Rick Costa (43:30):
From birth I put the fear of God in him, so he
became like me.
All I got to do is just giveyou a look and you're shaking.

Carmen Lezeth (43:36):
already I can't even imagine you being that
parent.
But I believe you Right?
I don't know.
I'm not real in all my.
Totally see it.
Cynthia and Rick, you guys arenice people.

Maurio Dawson (43:46):
I don't know Rick you guys are nice people.
I don't know.
I know you're mean.

Carmen Lezeth (43:52):
What you saying, you saying I'm not nice.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (43:54):
You can even ask my nieces.
They were like, oh no,cynthia's strict and they know.
They already know not to lie tome, because they already know,
I find out.

Carmen Lezeth (44:04):
I forgot that you have a facade going on because
everyone thinks you're the sweet, nice person on the show.
But we've seen your villainous,evil meanness.
It's true, I know y'all thinkshe's the sweet one and the kind
one.
She's not.
She's not.
I'm the sweet and kind one.
Y'all think I'm the mean one.
That's the weird thing, ain'tit true?

(44:25):
It's so true, I'm the kind one.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (44:33):
You're ain't it.
True, it's so true, I'm thekind one.
It is, it's so weird.

Carmen Lezeth (44:35):
It is, it's true.
I'll admit to that.
It is true.
But, rick, go ahead.
What did you do to make yourson be so fabulous and become a
doctor?

Rick Costa (44:41):
if I said something, I said it once.
Now we'll do this and that's it.
If you didn't do it, you paythe consequences.
You know, I'm gonna tell youagain.
I'm gonna tell you no, no, noone time, and that's it what
were the consequenceswaterboarding, whatever he
enjoys, he ain't doing it.

Maurio Dawson (45:03):
I'm so kidding for the listeners, I'm so
kidding.

Rick Costa (45:08):
We don't believe in corporate whatever he enjoys
doing, he ain't doing that nowthat's it, that's all, and how's
your relationship with your sonnow good, even with that level
of discipline?
Always, always was good.
Just, I mean teenage years.

(45:28):
You know it was a little roughbecause every excuse not to see
me not almost sick, I got toomuch homework.
Mind you, I'm driving 45minutes to go see him.

Alma Dawsom (45:40):
Every excuse in the book, but then you know things
change teenager yeah, now okaywell, I want to touch back on
something that you said beforeabout you know people feeling
like, because that person gotsomething, they have to get it
too.
It's that participation trophymentality you know today For

(46:03):
real, like, even though, yes,they have this work life balance
thing down to a T, but theyreally don't.
They do lack initiative, theydefinitely, you know, lack
organizational skills.
Oh for sure For real real andjust the work ethic.

(46:24):
Ok, fine, you're only going towork nine to five, but in that
nine to five, you need to showme what you can do.
I don't want to be hounding youand coming after you every
minute.
Did you already do what I askedyou?
Did you already?
Oh, guess what?
It's a write-up.
Now Let me go ahead.
I don't play.
I'm like, I just don't play.
Here's your, here's your email.
We're going to meet tomorrow atthis time.

(46:51):
Here's the paper copy ofeverything.
Here's all this stuff.
And then you're going to gotake this class because I need
to know that you know how to doit.
And so then now give me anexcuse and don't do it.
When I ask you to do it thefirst time, I just don't.
And it's like and when theyfind somebody like that, they're
like oh yeah, oh, oh yeah.
I get that all the time time.
I feel like this is becomingtoxic.

(47:12):
Well, they learned some bigphrases growing up and I, and,
and, and, literally, just like Iuse it with the parents, I will
use it with you.
Know, co-workers, whoever youcan look up the policy you, you
can call here.
Here's the number to call.
Call this office and they willI think sometimes it's not even

(47:32):
like I just find it's not evenworth it anymore.

Carmen Lezeth (47:34):
Like I mean, I know what you're saying the
people I work with, all of them,especially like I'm exhausted
by the amount of complaining.
Yes, like everything is so muchwork and I'm like you have no
idea what it is to work hard.
I'm sorry, like when I think ofmy mother being a housekeeper,

(47:56):
or I'm thinking of like peoplenow that work real jobs where
they're sweating and they'remanual work no labor, no right,
real.
No right, real, real labor.
Like I'm like nothing I do willever compare to that type of
work.
Nothing, nothing.
When I first moved to California, I got a free room and board in

(48:19):
Westwood from a gentleman, anolder gentleman, his name was Mr
Nasher, may he rest in peacebut he was like in his seventies
or eighties old.
He was a frail guy and, um, hehad, uh, someone who came in and
cleaned his house on a liketwice a week regularly, um, and
he had a nurse who came and heplayed the piano.
So he had an ad that said youknow, free room and board, um

(48:42):
for light housekeeping.
So when I first moved here, Itook that place and you have
your room.
I had to buy a mattress.
You had to buy your own littlefurniture or whatever.
It was a desk or something, soit wasn't much.
And you did light housekeepingokay, light housekeeping.
So he would make breakfast inthe morning.
You would have to clean upafter him.
You know what I mean.

(49:03):
There was a.
There was a side bathroom, nothis bathroom, but there was
another side bathroom.
You had to clean that bathroom.
You had to sweep the kitchen.
You had to clean that bathroom.
You had to sweep the kitchen.
You had to take care of thegarden in the back.
You know what I mean, not thelandscaping part, but, just like
you know, make sure the birdfeeder had feed in it or
whatever, and pick up any of theleaves that may be until the
gardener came, or whateverlittle stuff.

(49:23):
You know what I mean.
I did that for eight months,crying my eyes out every night
because it was so hard to do.
You know what I mean, but it washard.
I had just graduated fromcollege and I was trying to find
a job and I was doing like Iwas cleaning the little bathroom
and cleaning the floors and inthe kitchen and that's my whole

(49:46):
point is like I knew how hardthat work was and it wasn't even
the full housekeeping shit, youknow, because he was like
carmen carmen, come over herelike he'd be on the piano and he
would have his whatever, hisliquor or whatever, and his he
can you come and clean up thisstuff?
And he'd have like peanuts orsomething and just the amount of
work and getting the vacuum orwhatever.

(50:08):
And I know I'm making it like,but that's what I'm saying is
like I will never know what realhard labor is.
So when I hear thesemotherfuckers who have done not
even that much and they can't doshit like filing, I have to
tell you filing seems to be thething gen z cannot do.
I, I need you to file this.
They're like what, what?

(50:30):
I need you to file this stuffwe need it done.

Alma Dawsom (50:34):
It's the next generation.

Maurio Dawson (50:35):
That part they cannot file.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (50:38):
And it's like they forgot their ABCs
because it's like it's so hardfor them.

Alma Dawsom (50:43):
Oh, my goodness, oh my God, yeah, it's a whole
thing.

Carmen Lezeth (50:48):
I will never know or I'll always be respectful.
I love anybody that.
I love the people that work formy clients in their homes, like
the housekeepers, thelandscapers, whatever and also I
always work on my spanish withthem.
You know what I mean speakingin spanish, so I could, uh, work
on my Spanish, but they are themost lovely people, they work

(51:10):
the hardest, they make the leastamount of money.
You know what I mean.
They're so kind, they're suchgood people and they are treated
like shit by everyone.

Alma Dawsom (51:20):
That's the one thing that I made sure that you
know.
Our daughter knows her rootsand where she came from.
My mother came to this countryand that's how she made her
living.
She made her livinghousekeeping.
I started going to work with mymother when I was 11 years old
and she would put me on the busto go to one of the houses.

(51:42):
She would start, another house,she would finish and then she
would meet me and help me finish.
Like that.
Those were my summers.
I didn't know what summer campwas, I didn't know.
I mean, you get what I'm tryingto say.
I was like I was like they doon tv.
I want to do that.
But I mean, I did exactly.

(52:03):
I mean, but you know, butthat's why I made sure that she
understood, but she got to dosummer camp.

Maurio Dawson (52:12):
Yeah, you know what?

Alma Dawsom (52:13):
I'm saying that's so good, that's so good, yeah,
but she also understood the hardwork and the sacrifice that
came with it.
So, anywhere that she's gone, Idon't care where it is, she's
gone, you know, to great placesgreat places.
And I always tell her, whereveryou go, the people that you want

(52:35):
to know are the people who areworking behind the house, the
people who are working in theoffices, In the restaurants.
Those are the people that youwant to know Because, guess what
?
They know some of everyone andeverything.
They know who everyone is, theyknow where everyone is, they
know where, they know all thesecrets and they will be the

(52:55):
ones who will help you.
I said nobody else is gonna.
I said you know and and andit's been very true for her.

Maurio Dawson (53:03):
Perfect example Once you moved to Switzerland,
and the people who worked in thekitchen and in the service
areas of the school those wereher lifesavers.

Alma Dawsom (53:18):
Yeah, they were always going to look out for her
.

Maurio Dawson (53:21):
And that's what really got her through.

Carmen Lezeth (53:23):
Oh my God, Wow.
Well, that was a show I wasn'texpecting, wow.

Maurio Dawson (53:31):
It was a gift I kept giving and you didn't know
it.

Carmen Lezeth (53:34):
Yeah, no, I mean, I think I learned a lot.
You know, we are the bestgeneration.
That's what I've learned.
We were raised well though Iagree.
There were bad things about theway we were raised, though, too
.
Let's you know, we were allpretty much latchkey kids, I
assume.

Maurio Dawson (53:51):
I was yes.

Carmen Lezeth (53:52):
Which you know, for those people who don't know
what that means.
You know, we didn't have a lotof supervision.
We'd come home after school andit comes from having a key
around your neck and you'd letyourself in and you'd make your
own food and you'd do yourhomework and you'd play outside
till the lights came on orwhatever, and um you drink from
a water hose isn't that funnythat people think that's such a

(54:15):
big deal.
I'm like not at all but if yousay it, they get like kids are.
That was a big thing.
On tiktok, you drink from awater hose?
Yes, we drink from.
That was our water fountain.

Maurio Dawson (54:27):
Yes, and we kept playing and kept going.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (54:30):
Right.

Maurio Dawson (54:31):
We didn't have video games.
We had Atari back in the day.
Then we had Nintendo.

Carmen Lezeth (54:36):
Centipede I loved Centipede.
No, we went to the arcade, thearcade.

Alma Dawsom (54:41):
Yeah, the corner store had the machines that you
put on.

Maurio Dawson (54:46):
You go to the bodega or the liquor store that
you put up.
You go to the bodega or theliquor store.
You stay there for four hoursplaying video games in the store
and you knew everybody on yourblock and everybody take turns
and you bring your stack ofquarters and you stack up saying
I'm next, I'm up next.
That was the stuff I remember.

Carmen Lezeth (55:02):
And then you would watch all the elders who
you knew were all gang members,playing pool, playing pool, dr
pool, and all the ladies of theevening who were so nurturing
and loving to you.
As a kid being in the pool hall, you remember right what was

(55:23):
the name of that pool houseright there, where high, low was
what was it.
We used to go play arcades.
All the time it was a bowlingalley and, yes, yes, it had our
game and there were a bunch oflike gangsters.
I mean, they weren't, they werejust older men and ladies call

(55:43):
it what it was back in the dayback in the 70s, that know what
it was.

Maurio Dawson (55:47):
Back in the 70s they was calling pips in house.
I didn't know what it was.

Carmen Lezeth (55:52):
We didn't know what was behind those other
doors, we didn't care, we werejust hanging out man.
But you know what?
I really was so naive I thinkmost of us were.

Maurio Dawson (56:03):
You were yeah.

Carmen Lezeth (56:04):
But you felt safe around all these people.

Alma Dawsom (56:07):
They didn't harm any of the children I mean not
that I know of Because that wasour village, that was you know,
and I think that now theseyounger kids have access to so
much information that we didn't.

Carmen Lezeth (56:21):
Yeah, that we did not.
That's a good point too.
Wait, Cynthia, what were yousaying?
That was our village.
Right, that was our town, thatwas our village.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (56:28):
Yeah too Wait.
Cynthia what were you saying?
That was our village, right,that was our town.

Carmen Lezeth (56:34):
That was our village, yeah, and everyone knew
everyone and everyone coulddiscipline you.
But I think that's part of thething, though right Too right,
the discipline too, but therewas also that part of it too is
that when anything did happen,that was bad or wrong or
horrible to a child, because itdid happen, and I think that's
what ended up making this.
We've gone, the pendulum hasgone the other way, because
there would be a child abductedor something horrible would
happen and people got reallyafraid and scared or whatever.

(56:56):
And then the pendulum went theother way, where there's all of
these like we have to have whatdo you call them when you go and
play dates?
Oh my God.
Like scheduling you know and Iremember talking to Juliana one
time and she said actually shewas on the podcast, she
scheduling, you know.
And I remember talking tojuliana one time and she said
actually she was on the podcast.
She said this, she said thewhole idea that all she wishes
it was like in the 80s when yourparents didn't have to come
with you to go hang out withyour friends, because and I was

(57:19):
like, what are you talking about?
But because they have toschedule play dates, that means
the parents have to get alongand then they go and hang out
with each other and then thekids have to play with the other
kids you know we hated that.

Maurio Dawson (57:31):
What?
Yeah, you, but the parentswanted for us, like my best
friends cory and chris.
Our mothers knew each other,but we didn't all.
They didn't all hang like wewould.
Just, I want to go to cory'shouse, okay, is his mama going
to be home?
I'm dropping you off and thenI'll see you later that was it?

Carmen Lezeth (57:51):
It was like I understand what you're saying it
was not a big thing.
It wasn't a big thing.
Well, I mean I never had theplay date, the scheduled date,
but yeah, I mean you did have to, but we would lie all the time.
What no sleepovers.

Cynthia Ruiz Lopez (58:05):
Oh nope, they can come stay at your house
, but you couldn't stay attheirs.
I was older.

Carmen Lezeth (58:14):
Yeah, I don't have that experience because I
was staying at people's housesall the time, but that's because
it was a different.
I didn't have my parents, yeah,so you guys couldn't go stay
over at people's houses.

Maurio Dawson (58:26):
They could come to your house, but you couldn't
go to theirs.
My best friends came to myhouse, but I never went to.
No, I went to their house onetime and then all hell broke
loose.

Carmen Lezeth (58:36):
But that's another, that's a story for
another day all right okay, well, now I'm all nostalgic and
everything but um, wow, allright anyway, thank you everyone
.
It was great to hang out andremember.
At the end of the day, itreally is all about the joy, all
about the joy.

(58:57):
Thanks for stopping by.
All About the Joy Be better andstay beautiful.
Folks have a sweet day.