In many marriages, there’s a quiet, often invisible dynamic that keeps one person shrinking and the other wondering why they feel so alone — even when both partners care deeply.
It’s called the “one down” position.
And it’s more common than you might think.
Sometimes it looks like always apologizing…
Or saying, “You deserve better than me.”
Or hiding behind a wall of withdrawal and silence.
But underneath, it’s all rooted in shame — a belief that “I’m not enough,” or “I don’t belong in this relationship as I am.”
In this week’s episode of AwakenYou in Your Marriage, I’m diving deep into this dynamic:
💬 What it really means to be one down
🔄 The two different ways it can show up — walled off or boundaryless
💡 How it might be quietly playing out in your own marriage
🌱 And most importantly, what you can do to begin shifting back into equal, emotionally safe partnership — whether it’s your spouse who’s stuck there, or you.
This episode is an invitation to reflect with compassion — not judgment — and to start noticing the patterns that might be keeping connection just out of reach.
🎧 Listen now and begin the journey of stepping into deeper emotional equality
CBS News Interview: 6 Tips For A Healthy & Loving Relationship
Unlock deeper connection in your marriage with my free guide, Daily Prompts for Deeper Connection with Your Spouse—get it now!
Start feeling more connected and loved in your marriage today with my free Reclaim More Love in Just 3 Days process. This process will have you learning how to shift your focus, in a healthy way, and nurture thoughts that build connection and transform how you feel about your marriage.
More resources and how you can start the process of Awakening(YourTrue)You and being the partner who creates your best version of what marriage looks like for you: https://christinebongiovanni.com/
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