June 27, 2025 • 10 mins
Strategies for balance don't work without the right mindset to support them. No matter how many wellness tools you try, they'll only become effective when paired with crucial mindset shifts that ambitious women often miss.
• Meditation works when you shift from trying to stop thoughts to letting go and processing your day
• Time blocking requires detaching from the belief that busyness equals importance
• Waking up early needs preparation and clarity about why that time matters to you
• Self-care becomes possible when you separate your self-worth from your to-do list
• Boundaries only work when you know who you are and what matters to you
• Small acts of self-care can be as valuable as grand gestures
• Learning to tap into what you actually need rather than what you think you should do
• Letting go of guilt which robs you of joy
Share this episode with a friend who needs to hear it today, and don't forget to subscribe to Balance and Beyond for full episodes and more of these bite-sized breakthroughs.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Welcome to Balance and Beyond Moments.
Your weekly dose of insight,wisdom and mindset shifts, all
in 10 minutes or less, whetherit's a powerful truth, a fresh
perspective or a spark ofinspiration.
This is your space to pause,reflect and reset.
Let's dive in.
Do you feel like you're doingall the things that you're told
(00:28):
are meant to work to help bringyou balance, Whether it's
meditation, getting up early,taking care of yourself?
You've got all the fridgemagnets, you've seen all the
quotes and yet, no matter howhard you try, they are not
giving you the results that theyare meant to.
Well, you are not alone.
I thought I had what was apretty good toolkit.
(00:49):
I was doing all the things thatsuccessful people were meant to
do, and yet I was feeling worseand nothing converted.
So today I want to share withyou what actually is going on
when you're trying to use thesetools.
What is going wrong for you and, most importantly, what is the
missing ingredient?
What is the missing shift that,in particular, I have found
(01:11):
ambitious women.
What are we missing that isstopping these working for you?
The good news is, there'snothing wrong with your
strategies.
Meditation works.
Time blocking works.
Waking up early works.
You can take care of yourself.
However, if you do not have themindset that supports your
strategy, no amount ofstrategies are going to work.
(01:32):
And this is the piece no one isteaching us.
No one is teaching us, as awoman who's working, who's
juggling, kids and family andfour-legged friends and the rest
of it what is the mindset thatyou need to ensure that any
strategy for you is actuallygoing to work?
Let me talk you through each ofthese five elements that I've
tapped into and what is missingfrom a mindset perspective
(01:56):
that's going to allow you forthat strategy to now implement.
And the good news is, when youstart to really understand
yourself, you build thisself-awareness and you can learn
to shift your mindset.
Any strategy that you pick up,whether it's from a podcast or a
leadership program or a friendor something you've read, it's
actually going to land.
(02:17):
And this is the mostfrustrating part is women come
to me saying, jo, I've triedeverything, I've read every
podcast and I'm trying and I'mtrying strategy and I'm trying
to do it and it's not working.
And it's not the strategy, myfriend, it is your mindset.
You need to learn how to shiftyour mindset around all of these
pieces or it's never going tochange.
(02:38):
So let's talk about meditationand how meditation is actually
going to work for you.
Now again, it's not the strategyof sitting down and trying to
get quiet for five minutes, forfive or 10 minutes.
What actually needs to shifthere is your mindset that
meditation isn't about trying tostop your thoughts, because I
(02:59):
don't know about you, but Ifound that impossible.
My brain is very, very busy.
But meditation works when yousee it as an opportunity to let
go and process your day, when itbecomes an opportunity to tap
into your body and see what isthere and get beyond the
thoughts.
So they just become likeannoying clouds that are
(03:19):
floating across the sky and youcan detach yourself from that.
Some people will say you justneed time, you need to continue
to sit on the cushion and or,you know, lie from that.
Some people will say you justneed time, you need to continue
to sit on the cushion and or,you know, lie down, or and just
persist and persist and persist.
But I gave meditation a darnhot go.
I did it for months, I think Ieven because I'm competitive got
myself up to like a hundred daystreak and it still wasn't
(03:39):
doing what it was meant to forme, and usually that's because I
was trying too hard.
So again, it comes down to whatis the purpose of this.
What is the mindset I'm takingto go into meditation?
Time blocking only works whenyou have detangled yourself from
the feeling that being busyequals important and when you
(04:02):
stop prioritizing everybodyelse's stuff, whether it's their
laundry or whatever it is, overyour own.
Because when you do not haveagency over your own time, when
you don't think that your timematters, you will continue to
give it away.
And this is all about saying no.
Usually, it's not about sayingno to others, it's about saying
(04:25):
yes to you.
It's wine with a friend, or awalk or a nap, or to sit and
read your book, or for somebodyelse to pick up the laundry for
that day.
But until you're able to reallydisentangle, to detach and
shift your mindset that beingbusy does not make you important
, you will only ever want to putout fires.
(04:47):
And even though I have peopleall the time saying to me Jo, I
don't like doing this, I knowthis doesn't serve me, and yet,
from a mindset perspective, on asubconscious level, you have
not yet cleared those blocks.
So while logically,intellectually, you know this
doesn't serve you.
You haven't yet done themindset work deep enough to
(05:09):
better stop these patternshappening.
Likewise, we talk about wakingup early.
Well, what's the mindset thatyou need in order to get up
early and actually block outthat time for you?
Well, first and foremost, yougot to get to bed early.
Getting to bed at 1am and thentrying to get up at 5am is
clearly not enough sleep.
(05:29):
That's the first piece.
The other piece is you need toreally understand why is it that
I want to get up early?
And I really, really hope it'snot to just get in an extra load
of laundry.
If you're getting up early, howdo you ensure that this time is
for you and you are very, veryclear on what you're doing and
why?
Because I don't know about you,but my brain isn't the most,
(05:52):
let's say, firing or it's not,as its full capacity could be a
better way to describe it at 5am.
So if I'm ever deciding to getup early, and pretty regularly,
I do this, but the night beforeI've decided I'm getting up
early.
This is why, and this is whatI'm going to do, so that I get
up and there is no intellectualthought required, because that
thought's going to go oh, snoozeor no intellectual thought
(06:13):
required because that thought'sgoing to go oh, snooze or oh,
and we're going to go straightinto right.
I've got to do this and thisand this and this and say no.
This time is for me, this is mytime.
When we talk about taking careof yourself, we mentioned before
.
You know what stops us notdoing this is the guilt and the
hassle.
The mindset that you need inorder to actually take care of
(06:37):
yourself and enjoy it isseparating your self-worth from
your to-do list, because you aremore than just things that you
can get done.
You have nothing to prove, youhave nothing to do and you
certainly don't need to earn thetime to take care of yourself.
So many women tell me that I'veonly taken care of myself when
things have started to break.
I will only make the time totake myself to the doctor when I
(06:59):
literally can't get out of bed.
Or, you know, a friend will buyme a voucher because I can't
bear to spend the money onmyself because of the guilt and
this is another piece.
You have to learn to let go ofguilt.
It is an emotion that does notserve you and it will rob you of
any joy.
The other mindset shift you needto make around taking care of
(07:21):
yourself is to move beyond thegrand gestures of the spa days
and the massage and like to beclear.
Go for it, my, my friend, asmuch as you can.
However, how can you reframetaking care of yourself and it
become about a nice cup of teastanding in the sunshine?
How can taking care of yourselfmean feeding yourself lunch?
(07:45):
How can taking care of yourselfmean space to breathe or to
move your body, even if it's nota 45-minute sweaty workout, but
you've only got 10?
Well, taking care of myself ismoving my body in a way that
serves me in those 10 minutes.
Taking care of yourself is alsoensuring that you ask yourself
(08:09):
what you need, which is a verydifferent mindset to right got
to do this and this and this andthis.
For some mornings I wake up andthink, okay, I really I need to
go for a run.
And I wake up and tap into mybody and it says, oh, you're
actually quite sore from theweekend.
Why don't you do yoga instead?
Do something a little moregentle, and I'm able to listen
(08:31):
to that because I've shifted mymindset and go ah, because it's
not about I have to sweat and Ihave to do 45 minutes.
It's about what do I actuallyneed?
And sometimes 10 minutes ofyoga, I feel fabulous because
that is what I needed.
So I've separated thatself-worth from the list.
And then, lastly, the mindsetshift here around boundaries is
(08:54):
you can't boundary somethingthat you don't know where it
begins and where it ends, thatyou don't know where it begins
and where it ends.
I hear all the time that youknow, jo, I don't know who I am
anymore.
I've become so defined by mylabels call them mother, wife,
ex-executive, ex-profession andI don't know what I enjoy.
(09:18):
I've completely lost myself intaking care of others.
So when you don't know what Ienjoy, I've completely lost
myself in taking care of others.
So when you don't know whatmatters to you, when you don't
know who you are, is it anywonder you continue to look
outside yourself for thesereference points?
We compare ourselves Ah,they're doing that.
Do I want to do that or not?
Instead of learning to tap intothat innate wisdom that lies
(09:41):
within?
It only happens when you makethe space to actually get quiet
and when you know who you areand what matters to you, it
becomes really easy to hold up aboundary about.
Do I really want to do that?
Yes, okay, great, well, I'mgoing to do it and make that
choice and move on, and then youcan implement strategies around
(10:06):
saying no, but if you don'tknow what you're saying no or
yes to well, then nothing's evergoing to stick.
The boundary is going tocollapse at the first sign of
pressure.
Can you see how mindset reallyis?
Everything?
Really is everything.
Thanks for taking this momentfor yourself.
If this resonated, share itwith a friend who needs to hear
(10:26):
it today, and don't forget tosubscribe to Balance and Beyond
for full episodes and more ofthese bite-sized breakthroughs.
See you next time.
Welcome to Balance and Beyond Moments.
Your weekly dose of insight,wisdom and mindset shifts, all
in 10 minutes or less, whetherit's a powerful truth, a fresh
perspective or a spark ofinspiration.
This is your space to pause,reflect and reset.
Let's dive in.
Do you feel like you're doingall the things that you're told
(00:28):
are meant to work to help bringyou balance, Whether it's
meditation, getting up early,taking care of yourself?
You've got all the fridgemagnets, you've seen all the
quotes and yet, no matter howhard you try, they are not
giving you the results that theyare meant to.
Well, you are not alone.
I thought I had what was apretty good toolkit.
(00:49):
I was doing all the things thatsuccessful people were meant to
do, and yet I was feeling worseand nothing converted.
So today I want to share withyou what actually is going on
when you're trying to use thesetools.
What is going wrong for you and, most importantly, what is the
missing ingredient?
What is the missing shift that,in particular, I have found
(01:11):
ambitious women.
What are we missing that isstopping these working for you?
The good news is, there'snothing wrong with your
strategies.
Meditation works.
Time blocking works.
Waking up early works.
You can take care of yourself.
However, if you do not have themindset that supports your
strategy, no amount ofstrategies are going to work.
(01:32):
And this is the piece no one isteaching us.
No one is teaching us, as awoman who's working, who's
juggling, kids and family andfour-legged friends and the rest
of it what is the mindset thatyou need to ensure that any
strategy for you is actuallygoing to work?
Let me talk you through each ofthese five elements that I've
tapped into and what is missingfrom a mindset perspective
(01:56):
that's going to allow you forthat strategy to now implement.
And the good news is, when youstart to really understand
yourself, you build thisself-awareness and you can learn
to shift your mindset.
Any strategy that you pick up,whether it's from a podcast or a
leadership program or a friendor something you've read, it's
actually going to land.
(02:17):
And this is the mostfrustrating part is women come
to me saying, jo, I've triedeverything, I've read every
podcast and I'm trying and I'mtrying strategy and I'm trying
to do it and it's not working.
And it's not the strategy, myfriend, it is your mindset.
You need to learn how to shiftyour mindset around all of these
pieces or it's never going tochange.
(02:38):
So let's talk about meditationand how meditation is actually
going to work for you.
Now again, it's not the strategyof sitting down and trying to
get quiet for five minutes, forfive or 10 minutes.
What actually needs to shifthere is your mindset that
meditation isn't about trying tostop your thoughts, because I
(02:59):
don't know about you, but Ifound that impossible.
My brain is very, very busy.
But meditation works when yousee it as an opportunity to let
go and process your day, when itbecomes an opportunity to tap
into your body and see what isthere and get beyond the
thoughts.
So they just become likeannoying clouds that are
(03:19):
floating across the sky and youcan detach yourself from that.
Some people will say you justneed time, you need to continue
to sit on the cushion and or,you know, lie from that.
Some people will say you justneed time, you need to continue
to sit on the cushion and or,you know, lie down, or and just
persist and persist and persist.
But I gave meditation a darnhot go.
I did it for months, I think Ieven because I'm competitive got
myself up to like a hundred daystreak and it still wasn't
(03:39):
doing what it was meant to forme, and usually that's because I
was trying too hard.
So again, it comes down to whatis the purpose of this.
What is the mindset I'm takingto go into meditation?
Time blocking only works whenyou have detangled yourself from
the feeling that being busyequals important and when you
(04:02):
stop prioritizing everybodyelse's stuff, whether it's their
laundry or whatever it is, overyour own.
Because when you do not haveagency over your own time, when
you don't think that your timematters, you will continue to
give it away.
And this is all about saying no.
Usually, it's not about sayingno to others, it's about saying
(04:25):
yes to you.
It's wine with a friend, or awalk or a nap, or to sit and
read your book, or for somebodyelse to pick up the laundry for
that day.
But until you're able to reallydisentangle, to detach and
shift your mindset that beingbusy does not make you important
, you will only ever want to putout fires.
(04:47):
And even though I have peopleall the time saying to me Jo, I
don't like doing this, I knowthis doesn't serve me, and yet,
from a mindset perspective, on asubconscious level, you have
not yet cleared those blocks.
So while logically,intellectually, you know this
doesn't serve you.
You haven't yet done themindset work deep enough to
(05:09):
better stop these patternshappening.
Likewise, we talk about wakingup early.
Well, what's the mindset thatyou need in order to get up
early and actually block outthat time for you?
Well, first and foremost, yougot to get to bed early.
Getting to bed at 1am and thentrying to get up at 5am is
clearly not enough sleep.
(05:29):
That's the first piece.
The other piece is you need toreally understand why is it that
I want to get up early?
And I really, really hope it'snot to just get in an extra load
of laundry.
If you're getting up early, howdo you ensure that this time is
for you and you are very, veryclear on what you're doing and
why?
Because I don't know about you,but my brain isn't the most,
(05:52):
let's say, firing or it's not,as its full capacity could be a
better way to describe it at 5am.
So if I'm ever deciding to getup early, and pretty regularly,
I do this, but the night beforeI've decided I'm getting up
early.
This is why, and this is whatI'm going to do, so that I get
up and there is no intellectualthought required, because that
thought's going to go oh, snoozeor no intellectual thought
(06:13):
required because that thought'sgoing to go oh, snooze or oh,
and we're going to go straightinto right.
I've got to do this and thisand this and this and say no.
This time is for me, this is mytime.
When we talk about taking careof yourself, we mentioned before
.
You know what stops us notdoing this is the guilt and the
hassle.
The mindset that you need inorder to actually take care of
(06:37):
yourself and enjoy it isseparating your self-worth from
your to-do list, because you aremore than just things that you
can get done.
You have nothing to prove, youhave nothing to do and you
certainly don't need to earn thetime to take care of yourself.
So many women tell me that I'veonly taken care of myself when
things have started to break.
I will only make the time totake myself to the doctor when I
(06:59):
literally can't get out of bed.
Or, you know, a friend will buyme a voucher because I can't
bear to spend the money onmyself because of the guilt and
this is another piece.
You have to learn to let go ofguilt.
It is an emotion that does notserve you and it will rob you of
any joy.
The other mindset shift you needto make around taking care of
(07:21):
yourself is to move beyond thegrand gestures of the spa days
and the massage and like to beclear.
Go for it, my, my friend, asmuch as you can.
However, how can you reframetaking care of yourself and it
become about a nice cup of teastanding in the sunshine?
How can taking care of yourselfmean feeding yourself lunch?
(07:45):
How can taking care of yourselfmean space to breathe or to
move your body, even if it's nota 45-minute sweaty workout, but
you've only got 10?
Well, taking care of myself ismoving my body in a way that
serves me in those 10 minutes.
Taking care of yourself is alsoensuring that you ask yourself
(08:09):
what you need, which is a verydifferent mindset to right got
to do this and this and this andthis.
For some mornings I wake up andthink, okay, I really I need to
go for a run.
And I wake up and tap into mybody and it says, oh, you're
actually quite sore from theweekend.
Why don't you do yoga instead?
Do something a little moregentle, and I'm able to listen
(08:31):
to that because I've shifted mymindset and go ah, because it's
not about I have to sweat and Ihave to do 45 minutes.
It's about what do I actuallyneed?
And sometimes 10 minutes ofyoga, I feel fabulous because
that is what I needed.
So I've separated thatself-worth from the list.
And then, lastly, the mindsetshift here around boundaries is
(08:54):
you can't boundary somethingthat you don't know where it
begins and where it ends, thatyou don't know where it begins
and where it ends.
I hear all the time that youknow, jo, I don't know who I am
anymore.
I've become so defined by mylabels call them mother, wife,
ex-executive, ex-profession andI don't know what I enjoy.
(09:18):
I've completely lost myself intaking care of others.
So when you don't know what Ienjoy, I've completely lost
myself in taking care of others.
So when you don't know whatmatters to you, when you don't
know who you are, is it anywonder you continue to look
outside yourself for thesereference points?
We compare ourselves Ah,they're doing that.
Do I want to do that or not?
Instead of learning to tap intothat innate wisdom that lies
(09:41):
within?
It only happens when you makethe space to actually get quiet
and when you know who you areand what matters to you, it
becomes really easy to hold up aboundary about.
Do I really want to do that?
Yes, okay, great, well, I'mgoing to do it and make that
choice and move on, and then youcan implement strategies around
(10:06):
saying no, but if you don'tknow what you're saying no or
yes to well, then nothing's evergoing to stick.
The boundary is going tocollapse at the first sign of
pressure.
Can you see how mindset reallyis?
Everything?
Really is everything.
Thanks for taking this momentfor yourself.
If this resonated, share itwith a friend who needs to hear
(10:26):
it today, and don't forget tosubscribe to Balance and Beyond
for full episodes and more ofthese bite-sized breakthroughs.
See you next time.
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