Ep 126: Alanis Mortise-Set

The guys agree that Alanis Mortise Set might be the best episode title so far and kick off Thanksgiving week with Colton already up in Tioga at his in laws place chopping wood and doing horse stuff while Jess is staying local because they have a big trip planned for early December

Ross reveals his Thanksgiving menu game is next level with a 12 to 14 hour Cajun smoked turkey using mesquite wood and injecting flavor underneath the skin like turkey Botox plus a 14 pound brisket and he shares his third favorite which is Greek style lamb roast that requires cross hatching the meat and shoving whole garlic cloves down into the skin

The crew dives deep into the perfect lamb preparation technique which involves covering the entire roast in olive oil and rosemary then slow cooking at 180 to 200 degrees for 10 hours before kicking it up to 250 for the final two hours and Ross explains you have to put it in the night before to get that perfect fall off the bone texture

This episode delivers the promised Deep Cut hair trivia segment covering everything from barbers being the original multi tool professionals to beards representing power fashion and rebellion throughout history plus mustaches going through their own eras with styles like the handlebar walrus Fu Manchu chevron and that pencil thin villain look

The guys drop some incredible mustache facts including that Tom Selleck had his signature Magnum PI mustache insured for over a million dollars and he was originally discovered as the Marlboro man before becoming a Hollywood icon which explains his rugged look

They reveal that Salvador Dali famously stiffened his pencil thin mustache with shellac and waxed it vertically to impossible angles creating his trademark surrealist look and the word mustache actually comes from the Greek word mystax which translates to lip bristle or upper lip hair

Colton shares a story about dressing up as Tom Selleck for Halloween which is when his wife Crystal fell in love with him and there is apparently a secret bar in Houston called the handlebar with Tom Selleck pictures all over the walls constantly playing his movies on the TVs

Jess launches into a passionate snipe about Home Depot trailer parking spots being taken by regular vehicles when contractors with actual trailers need them and he cannot understand why Home Depot does not enforce the rules better especially since there are literally a thousand other parking spots available

The conversation shifts to practical shop knowledge with Jess explaining the three four five rule for squaring corners using basic trigonometry where you measure three feet one way four feet the other way and if the diagonal between those points is exactly five feet then you have a perfect 90 degree corner

Ross shares two essential home maintenance nuggets including using SharkBite fittings for copper pipe connections which plumbers might not love but work great for amateur DIYers and the importance of updating old fixtures like shutoff valves and gas line connections when you have appliances pulled out since his 1976 original connections were causing water damage