Fast Five #28 – Breakaway Blondes, Couch Crimes, and a Beer That Controls People

Welcome to Fast Five #28 – the only podcast episode where we pitch five completely original movie ideas based on actual beers, and none of them are safe for the Oscars… or humanity.

This week, we recover from the chaos of Stuffed Cheeks (Feature Film #27) and dive headfirst into five new cinematic disasters waiting to happen. We’ve got a Angels vs Demons + Amish thriller, a sentient couch conspiracy, and yes, time manipulation via craft beer.

And YOU get to decide which one becomes our next feature film. That’s right — five beers enter, one beer-inspired movie leaves.

🎥 Featured Beers:

•Breakaway Blonde – She’s faster than your alibi.

•Overcast Café – Coffee, clouds, and possible secrets.

•Couch Time – The furniture is alive… and it has thoughts.

•Activator – Espionage, and possible anti-DraftKings-Propaganda.

•Newfallen – A mystical winter tale or an angelic rumspringa

🎧 Listen now, laugh with us, and then head over to Instagram to cast your vote for next week’s feature film: https://www.instagram.com/beermethatmovie

📈 Don’t forget to like, comment, and subscribe to help us keep this madness going!

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CHAPTER MARKERS:

00:00 - Intro

01:32 - Recap: Stuffed Cheeks

08:16 - BOTW - Hop Beard from Fonta Flora

12:27 - Beer #1 - Breakaway Blonde

20:32 - Beer #2 - Overcast Cafe

26:30 - Beer #3 - Couch Time

33:57 - Beer #4 - Activator

43:32 - Beer #5 - Newfallen

51:54 - Get Ready To Vote

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