Behind Grief, Navigating Grief and Loss with Dr. Chinasa Elue

In this powerful episode of Behind Beliefs, Behaviors and The Brain, I sit down with Dr. Chinasa Elue, award-winning professor, grief coach, and founder of True Titans Consulting Group, for a deeply human and necessary conversation about grief. We explore how grief shows up not only through the loss of loved ones but also through life transitions, identity changes, workplace shifts, collective trauma, and even the loss of public figures we never personally knew. 

Dr. Elue shares her own story of losing her mother in 2019, an experience that unfolded just before the global grief of the pandemic. She walks us through the emotional, relational, and physiological realities of grief and highlights why grief remains one of the most avoided conversations in society. Together we discuss why individuals fear collapsing under the weight of grief, how to support people without overstepping, and how organizations can create compassionate space for employees experiencing loss. 

This episode invites us to humanize grief, understand its many forms, and learn how to honor it within ourselves and one another. 

 

Key Takeaways 

Grief Goes Far Beyond the Loss of Loved Ones 

Grief shows up in many life experiences including layoffs, career transitions, retirement, divorce, medical diagnoses, surgeries such as hysterectomy or mastectomy, friendship changes, children leaving home, and loss of identity. Recognizing the breadth of grief helps us name what we are actually feeling. 

We Are Still Living in a State of Collective Grief 

The world has not fully recovered from the emotional impact of the pandemic. People continue to navigate chronic stress, uncertainty, and losses of normalcy, safety, and connection. This ongoing grief influences how people show up in relationships and workplaces. 

People Avoid Grief Because They Fear It Will Stop Their Lives 

Many worry that if they allow themselves to feel grief, they will fall apart and be unable to function. This perception leads people to suppress emotion rather than create space for healing. Yet suppressed grief often resurfaces in anxiety, irritability, or emotional shutdown.  

Vicarious and Parasitocial Grief Are Real and Often Unnamed 

Grief can also appear when a beloved public figure or celebrity dies. Even without personal connection, the emotional impact can be significant because of the meaning or memories attached to that person. These feelings are legitimate and deserve acknowledgment. 

Supporting Someone Who Is Grieving Is About Presence, Not Words 

There are no perfect words to make grief disappear. Avoid platitudes like “they are in a better place.” What matters most is presence, listening, acts of service, and gentle check-ins. Simple gestures like bringing food or helping tidy the home can offer real comfort.  

Organizations Must Recognize and Accommodate Grief 

Most workplaces offer minimal bereavement policies and expect immediate performance afterward. Leaders can help by offering workload adjustments, flexible schedules, gradual return plans, temporary redistribution of responsibilities, and ongoing check-ins. Compassionate leadership reduces harm and supports long-term wellbeing. 

Grief Shows Up in Behavior and Communication 

Signs of grief can include irritability, withdrawal, distractedness, missed deadlines, lowered motivation, or increased emotional reactions. Recognizing shifts in behavior and approaching with care can open supportive dialogue.  

Grief Lives in the Body 

Physical symptoms such as anxiety, restlessness, fatigue, and tension are common in grief. Movement can help regulate the nervous system. Even ten to fifteen minutes of walking or gentle activity supports emotional processing. 

 

Helpful Resources: 

• Creating Space for Grieving Employees 

Leaders can support team members by normalizing conversations about grief, asking what support is needed, and offering temporary adjustments without penalizing performance. A human-centered approach fosters trust and psychological safety. 

• How to Care for a Grieving Friend or Colleague 

Presence, heartfelt listening, practical acts of service, and marking important dates such as holidays or anniversaries can make a tremendous difference. Small gestures remind people that their loved one is not forgotten. 

 

 

About the Guest 

Dr. Chinasa Elue is an award-winning professor, TEDx speaker, grief coach, and CEO and Founder of True Titans Consulting Group. Her work centers on creating spaces for authentic conversations about grief to foster more holistic and compassionate support in our communities. Through her grief coaching practice, she walks alongside individuals navigating loss of all kinds, helping them move forward with empathy and care. 

Dr. Chinasa Elue, is host