Episode 60: Normalizing the Grief Journey with Dr. Serign

In this episode with Dr. Serign Marong, we discuss the often-overlooked experience of grief, particularly within men and communities of color. Dr. Serign shares his journey of losing his wife suddenly while raising two young children and how that loss reshaped his life and work. We explore the importance of embracing sorrow as love, the impact of avoidance, and how healing begins when we stop running from pain. We also touch on legacy, fatherhood, and the unpredictability of grief. Tune in for an inspiring conversation that reminds us that while grief may take many forms, healing often comes in unexpected ways. 

 

Key Takeaways:  

Grief Cannot Be Compared – Everyone's grief is unique, and it’s icmportant not to compare losses. The emotional reaction to grief can be intense regardless of the situation, and it's okay to feel deeply no matter the cause of loss. 

The Grieving Process Starts Later –  For many, the true grieving process doesn’t begin immediately after a loss. Initially, people may be in survival mode, functioning on autopilot, and only later, when the distraction of logistics fades, does the full weight of grief set in. 

Avoidance is Part of the Journey – Trying to avoid pain or difficult emotions is natural. Grief can make you want to escape, but it’s a step in the process of healing, even if it doesn’t feel like it at the time. 

Facing Grief is Necessary for Healing –  While avoiding pain might feel like the easiest way to cope, eventually, you have to face it. Healing starts when you allow yourself to feel and process the grief. 

Legacy and Purpose Matter –  Thinking about the future and your legacy can help you find motivation to keep going. In this case, thinking about what kind of story your kids would tell about you made all the difference in pushing through the pain. 

Grief is a Journey – Grief doesn’t have an endpoint. It’s a journey that evolves over time. You might feel differently about your grief at different stages, and that’s okay. It’s important to acknowledge that you’re changing along with the process. 

 

Helpful Resource: 

• Grief Doesn't Follow a Set Timeline –  Grief doesn’t follow a specific schedule. You may not be “over it” at the expected time, and that’s okay. Everyone’s healing journey is different. 

• Normalizing the Grief Process –Grief is personal, and there’s no “right” way to grieve. It’s important to normalize the experience of grieving and allow people to grieve in their own time and manner. 

• Support and Connection in Healing –  Healing often comes when we’re surrounded by people who understand. Sometimes you can’t see it at the moment, but other people’s support, even when it’s hard to accept, helps you heal. 

 

Notable Highlights: 

"Everybody’s gonna have a different experience and I don’t think it can be controlled. It’s just going to be what it is and you have to adjust to that." 

"Loss can look like many things: losing a spouse, family members, divorce, jobs, even a license. There are different levels of grief." 

"Grief is a survival mode for a while, and then something happens that flips the switch, and that’s when the grief journey begins." 

"Divorce is definitely grief. It’s not losing the person you love, but it’s losing a life you had planned." 

"Grief is just love with nowhere to go." 

 

About Dr. Serign Marong 

Dr. Serign Marong is a board-certified family physician, grief advocate, and storyteller who transforms loss into healing. After the sudden passing of his wife in 2014, he stepped away from medicine to navigate deep grief and rebuild his life. Now remarried with a beautifully blended family, he brings compassion and lived experience to his thriving private practice in Tucson, AZ. Through his platform Dr.Serendipity.MD, he shares his journey, inspiring others through st