Standards, Conflict, Red Pill & AI: What We Learned [Ep 101]

A hundred down… and here’s the other fifty. 🎉

This is Part 2 of our 100th-episode celebration: a rapid-fire recap of Episodes 51–100. We revisit the biggest lessons (and a few hot takes): standards vs. expectations, how long to stay unhappy, defensiveness, chivalry, “what do you bring to the table?”, community, conflict, brutal truths for young and older women, modern-traditional roles, AI + dating, the “financial abuse” debate, winning your wife back, and the #1 relationship killer (resentment).

What you’ll learn

• How men can raise standards (not expectations) and stop tolerating disrespect

• A sane way to assess “I’m unhappy”—without pulling the parachute

• Why defensiveness torpedoes intimacy (and how to drop it)

• Chivalry, compliments, and the right kind of masculine leadership

• Why tolerance breeds resentment—and how to use conflict to bond

• The real talk for young women (leverage youth wisely) and older single women (lead with warmth, not baggage)

• How community accelerates growth—and when misalignment means boundaries

• Why red-pill hate harms boys and men—and what servant leadership looks like instead

• AI, smut, and social media: guarding desire in a digital world

• Practical steps to “win your wife back” (nothing manipulative—just standards)

Chapters (drop these in and tweak times after upload)

00:00 Cold open: Men, red pill, and leading with love

02:10 What we’re doing: Episodes 51–100 recap

04:05 E51 Standards vs. expectations (and why men set the bar too low)

07:35 E52 How long to be unhappy—and what “no parachute” actually means

11:05 E53 Our most important lessons (defensiveness, vulnerability, timing)

14:00 E54–55 Gold diggers, flirting with confidence (not “nice guy” energy)

18:10 E56–60 Chivalry, “women don’t care about men’s feelings?”, breakups, and “I need space”

24:00 E61–64 Is love enough? Why conflict beats tolerance every time

28:50 E65–66 Brutal truths for young vs. older single women

33:40 E67–68 Modern-traditional roles & can the right relationship heal you?

38:10 E69 Hard advice for men in their 20s (build, don’t date)

41:15 E70–72 She’s DMing your husband?! + The Way of the Superior Man + The Queen’s Code

46:00 E73–74 Red-pill crisis & the power of forgiveness (how we used it)

51:00 E75–77 “Men are dumb, women are crazy,” health, loyalty under stress

55:30 E78–80 Fighting styles, toxic ties, and “high standards vs. mediocre men”

59:30 E81–83 AI & dating, “women out of control?”, and marriage myths that hurt men

1:04:30 E84–86 Compliments men never hear, why waiting can help, and simps/pay-pigs

1:09:20 E87–90 Myths debunked, how to win your wife back, status crazy

1:14:10 E91–96 Wired to cheat/status, the “financial abuse” dust-up, destroying your sex life

1:19:20 E97–100 Therapy-speak fatigue, investment > sex, and Ep. 100 recap wrap-up

1:23:10 What changed for us: dropping defensiveness & cleaner conflict

Books & resources we mention

• The Way of the Superior Man — David Deida

• The Queen’s Code — Alison Armstrong

• The Surrendered Wife — Laura Doyle

Join the conversation

Which episode from 51–100 changed your mind the most—and why? Drop a comment (be kind, be specific).

About the show

Better Than Perfect is two imperfect people helping each other grow into one better-than-perfect relationship. New episodes every week.

Support the pod

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• Listen/watch all episodes at betterthanperfectpod.com

#BetterThanPerfectPodcast #Episode101 #relationships #marriage #boundaries #polarity #datingadvice #marriageadvice #conflictresolution #traditionalrelationship #AIandDating

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
And I guess my thing is, as men,it is your responsibility to
help actually guide men in the right direction.
And with the red pill stuff, it's causing more hate and more
problems rather than actually helping men and young boys.
That's on men because men aren'tgoing to listen to women anyway,
and men who hate women. So it's on men to try to help

(00:23):
these people understand in a healthy, proper way how to be a
man, not just be fueled by hate.And then now our children are
learning these things. You think they're going to
magically stop hating them Beyond?
The perfect we discovered through our flaws we complete
each other. Better than perfect we stay

(00:47):
through every fault we fight. No way.
All right, welcome back to the Better Than Perfect podcast,
where every week we share with you how 2 imperfect people
helping each other grow equals 1better than perfect
relationship. And we're back for Round 2.
Round 2 of Episode 100. Episode 100 point.

(01:07):
Five, yeah, but it's actually one O 1, yes.
So figure that out. Actually, one O 1, yeah.
So what we're doing is we're recapping some of our episodes
and giving a synopsis. Some points, if we change our
mind on them, we went through onepisode 100.
One through 50. Yep, so.
Go check that out, yeah. So we'll do 51 through 100.

(01:30):
Yeah. All right, let's see, let's
we'll have to speed run it stillbecause it's still a lot so.
We like to talk. All right, so episode 51 was men
set to low standards for women. Do you remember what we talked
about there? No.
I mean, I would think that maybeit's kind of what you said in

(01:53):
some of the other episodes that women just need to be attractive
to men. They don't really think about
the other sort of things as much.
I think that's. What I would assume that that's
what it is. Yeah, yeah, I'm, I'm.
Trying to they need to vet is what I'm thinking, which is what
I said in the other ones. Oh, a difference between
expectations and standards. We talked about that.

(02:14):
So it's like. In that episode.
Yeah, yeah. How to shift from having
expectations to standards like that, that men should have these
standards the way that women should treat them the way that
they should. Like they, they said too low
standards in terms of the treatment that they get from
women. So they tolerate disrespect,
they tolerate yelling in their face, they tolerate physical
abuse, like things like that where they shouldn't be

(02:35):
tolerating those things they should have.
From the beginning. Exactly.
Yeah, Yeah. How long should you be unhappy
in a relationship? Episode 52.
Didn't you say like years? You said like years.
I think I said maybe 2 years, but I think you said 5 or
something. Technically forever, right,

(02:57):
because we you talked about the parachute pulling the parachute.
Like we're not talking about abuse, but if you made a
commitment to be married to someone, it's it's to death to
you part. But two years of trying, is that
not the same episode where you talked about where if you give
it your all and don't worry about your needs for three to

(03:17):
six months? I can't remember how long you
said. Yeah, then.
Then you can make a decision. That should be in a.
It should be in a long term relationship, but not
necessarily in a marriage. Like a marriage is something
that like, unless there's abuse,you shouldn't really be exiting
that. I mean, I agree with that, but
also it's like. Abuse.

(03:40):
Cheating. You think someone's not going to
cheat if they're unhappy for twoyears?
Like I don't think it's OK. Well then, if they do, then for.
Five years, like I feel like that's when people do cheat is
and then they don't talk about it.
They do stuff behind people's backs because they're unhappy,
but they're supposed to stay there.
You see what I mean? Like I don't think we talked
about this in that episode, though.

(04:00):
But like, being that unhappy forthat long for years is usually
what ends up causing people to go behind the person's back and
make things even worse than if they just did.
You leave a marriage just because you're unhappy.
I don't think like you should ifyou haven't worked on it and

(04:25):
you're just like I'm. Unhappy, I'm gonna.
Leave. But then why are you making a
commitment? Why are you getting married?
Just don't get married. Just stay together and live in a
long term relationship and live together.
But that's why I think like if you're happy enough and like you
really want to be with that person and you know that before
you get married, I don't think you're will really even get to
that point. You shouldn't, but you should be

(04:47):
sure that that you're making like if you make the promise, if
you say I will love you like I will be with you till death do
us part right in sickness and health also mental health right
then. For better, for worse.
For better for worse, right? So that's not, there's no wiggle
room in there. That's like, well, if I'm not

(05:08):
happy, then I'll leave. If it's been 2 years and I'm not
happy I'll I'll leave. But then if you cheat what you
shouldn't do, then someone leaves.
So it's like. Then that's different because
that's that's breaking the contract at that point, it's
it's open because they've already broken.
Either way is breaking the contract, so I guess being.
Unhappy isn't breaking the contract.
If you like, left because you were unhappy.

(05:28):
Yeah, that's breaking the contract exactly.
That's what I'm saying, right? Is that so?
So it being unhappy should not be a reason to leave.
I think. In a marriage I agree with.
You. But I think if you're so unhappy
that you're going to cheat anyway, you might as well end
the relationship. Before you cheat, right?
Yes, yeah, yeah. Or, but just don't do either of
those. Things, Right, Right.

(05:49):
No. Like if you're committing,
you're committing to work through it no matter what.
Yeah. It's like if I'm like, I'm so
stressed out, I need to smoke a cigarette.
So I'm either gonna be stressed out or smoke a cigarette.
No, no, no. You could do neither of those
things. Like, find it differently,
right? Find something else, right?
So like work on their relationship.
The problem? Yeah.
Like you got to think that you're hitched to this person
permanently, right? Like there's no escape plan.

(06:11):
There is no parachute. There's no, you know, that's
really. And that's why you have to make
a really good decision when you get married.
Yeah, but also things can happenthat are outside of your
control. Your spouse could be in a car
accident, their face could be disfigured.
They could be in a coma. They could be and.
People leave people like that though.
I don't think that's OK, but. Or they could have a

(06:33):
debilitating illness that happens, right?
My mom, that's how she passed away from Parkinson's.
My dad stuck with her to the end.
Yeah. So.
So there's value in. Yeah, there is for.
Sure, there definitely is. I agree all.
Right, the Most important relationship lessons we've
learned Episode 53. That was kind of a bit of a
recap ish kind of episode. 53 I wonder which ones we've said in

(06:59):
that one let. Me see if I can.
I mean, I'm sure we, like you said, recapped.
Oh, being defensive was the big one.
That was the big one, yeah. Vulnerability is the key to
unlocking true intimacy. Hitting dangers of letting
issues fester. Transformative power of timely,
thoughtful communication. How to balance the masculine to

(07:19):
feminine energies? Yeah, being defensive is
probably still top tier. Yeah, because I feel like that
creates a lot of the actual conflict and arguments where it
gets messy. I think a lot of things would be
fixed a lot easier without the defensiveness.
And it's really hard to not be defensive.

(07:40):
Yeah. You know, unless you've really
practiced it and worked at it. Yeah.
So. Yeah.
Yeah. But those are good, Yeah.
And that's helped us a lot. I ain't seen She's a Gold Digger
but episode 54. Men talking about gold diggers.
Yeah, I think it was. Oh.

(08:03):
Our men gold diggers. That's what it was.
Men are the real gold diggers. That's what we were saying is
that the episode synopsis says John Nicole.
Explore why feeling unworthy destroys relationships and how
to embrace our flaws leads to deeper connection.
No, it was that men are gold. The real gold diggers.
The surprising truth about gold diggers and why men's fears are

(08:25):
often misplaced. It's because they're the gold
diggers. It's because they're they're the
gold diggers in terms of. Some of them are just straight
up gold diggers. Some are just straight up gold
diggers. That is true.
But but more men think that women are gold diggers.
But what they're really looking for is they're gold diggers.

(08:47):
They're looking for a success. They're looking for men that
that are committed to excellence.
To success, have ambition and Dr. Yeah and purpose.
They're gold diggers, sure. Which is.
Gold. Diggers avoid the friend zone by
learning to flirt like an asshole.
That's a good title. Episode 55 There we talked about

(09:07):
the flirting. So you don't be a, I'm sure.
Like coming across with confidence and assertiveness.
Yeah, let's see even. Learn how to flirt.
Go listen to that one. Have modern women killed
chivalry episode 56? Yeah, I think we said that they
did in some ways, because when they get pissed that a guy's

(09:28):
holding a door open, yeah, it makes a man less likely to do
that. And it's just straight up rude.
Like, it's just straight. You wouldn't yell at some granny
who held the door open for you, right?
So why are you yelling at a man who held the door open for you,
Right. Yeah.
Especially a man that you're going on a date with and he,
like, opens the car door and you're mad about that?
Like, are you kidding me? And I think The thing is, and I

(09:49):
think I said in the episode too,is that men have to not allow
women to kill children. It's like it doesn't matter.
Keep doing what? You think you just keep on doing
it. It's like a.
Woman will appreciate it one day.
I. Had been on dates with women
that tried to say something and I just that's what I do.
So I'm just I'm acting like she's crazy, Like I'm not
getting mad and yelling at her or trying to have the debate.
I'm just like because I'm the man.

(10:11):
Like why am I going to buy into your frame, this ridiculous
frame and even argue with you about it?
I'm just going to do the thing like try and stop.
And it shouldn't matter because if you're opening the door to
try to like get brownie points with her, that's also going to
come across that way. But if you're opening the door
because that's who you are as a person and as a man, that is

(10:31):
gonna actually get you what you want because you're standing
firm in what you want to do and how you're gonna treat people.
Exactly. And you can convert her into
like being like, oh, I was wrong.
You're right. Like that is really nice of you
to do, right? Because you're holding your
ground. Whereas like if you're a nice
guy and she's like, you don't have to hold the door open for
me. And then you, you stop doing it,

(10:52):
She's gonna know your pushover, right?
Exactly. And she's gonna know you're a
nice guy. Yeah, if you're like, I'm sorry.
You're like, stop apologizing all the time.
I I will. I won't.
I won't apologize. Sorry.
Yeah. I mean, I, I, yeah, I mean, I
won't. It's like, OK, you're done.
You're friend zone. All right?
Women don't care about men's feelings.
Episode 57. This was a super popular

(11:14):
episode. Yeah.
And and it and there was some truth to it in the sense that we
were talking about how like a lot of men do feel like that.
I think we we had the. The IT was like a clip of the.
Video Yeah, the. Guy had 1/2 on he.
Had this spool of wire that represented his life and then

(11:36):
his wife basically belittled what he was saying and then he
was like, that's why I. Wasn't there something about a
hat? She was saying like, are you
upset because whatever sports team lost or whatever, like she
simplified it down to she didn'treally care what?
What he said she wasn't really listening to him.
And then women want to be listened to and their feelings
want to be heard, but they don'tgive men the same courtesy.

(11:59):
Yeah, yeah, I think it is like we're talking about how a lot of
women do lack empathy. You know that they they have
sympathy, but they don't have true empathy.
I think they don't have a lot ofempathy for men specifically too
because of like their issues with men, just like men don't
have a lot of empathy for women a lot of the time too.
It's because of that underlying like hatred towards each other,

(12:23):
like dislike or like, I don't want to be taken advantage of by
this person. So they kind of keep each other
at arm's length and like treat each other poorly, which I don't
think is the right way to do it.But yeah, I mean, and I agree,
it's more complicated with men actually, because it's a
delicate balance. Whereas like women, you know, if

(12:46):
they feel like men don't have empathy towards them, it's, it
is more detrimental, I would sayto the relationship cuz women
have such big feelings and they're more feminine and that's
gonna be a lot. But it's harder for men to deal
with because they're told by everybody.
Don't share too much of your feelings with your wife for,
like, your concerns, but like, you still need to talk about

(13:09):
them. But then they don't know how.
So they shove stuff down a lot, and that causes resentment
because they don't know how to talk about it.
Yeah. So like it's more complicated
for men? Right.
Because if a man's a crybaby, right, then the women.
Attract. Empathy exactly.
And so men complain. It's like, well, if you women
say they want a man who is in touch with his emotions, but

(13:31):
then if he shares his emotions, then she's less attracted to
him, right? But it's like, yes and no.
If you're a crybaby and you showthat you're a wuss who can't
handle life or you're unsure of yourself all the time, doubting
your own self and you're not confident.
And like, yes, as a man, you're gonna have some insecurities.
But that's where it's like, callyour buddy up, have a group of

(13:52):
men that you talk to you share your insecurities with them, but
not with your woman. You know what I'm saying?
But but it's not the same. Like she can share her
insecurities, that's fine, but you shouldn't be sure.
Well, you're the leader. I think maybe even in that
episode, you, you said it in oneof the episodes, you talk about
how if you're in the military and your generals like, oh, do
you guys want to go in there? Yeah.

(14:12):
And they're like, no, not really.
You're like, all right, yeah. We shouldn't go in.
There or if you're like, I'm really scared, like I don't
know, guys like I just want to talk to you before the big
battle tomorrow. Like, I know you guys are
scared, but I'm also scared like, you know?
Yeah, when you're a leader, it does make it more complicated
because you can't share. That kind of.
Stuff you can't share a certain extent because then it does at

(14:36):
least make the people who are following your lead a little bit
more weary, right? Like a little bit like, OK,
maybe he doesn't have it handledas much as he thinks he does.
But even if like like your womantrusts you and you know, she
fully trusts you 100%, you can still kind of wear at that like

(14:59):
leadership like her following your lead.
If you're coming to her and talking to her about things that
you're supposed to be handling, but you don't really feel like
you have a handle on it. And then she just listens.
And then she can't do anything though, cuz she's not supposed
to do anything. And it makes her feel helpless.
But like, no, I can help you. But then it's like so it's more

(15:19):
complicated. For.
Men. Yeah, for sure.
Women do need to listen to what men want to say.
But men do have to pick and choose, like you said, what they
talk to their women about. Unfortunately.
Like, I wish it could be totallyopen, but honestly, men need
more masculine energy in those moments where they're like, I'm
scared. I don't know if I can do this.

(15:39):
They need somebody to be like, you can do this, brother.
They don't need like, a woman being like, oh, honey, you don't
have to do that if you don't want to, because then they'll be
like, OK, yeah, I don't. Want to, you know, and that's
going to make them feel like less attractive to that woman
and, and she's going to feel like and.
Then she doesn't trust your leadas much.
Or even if a guy's like, like, honey, I'm just scared that

(16:01):
you're looking at other men like, oh God, that's going to
kill the attraction. Like it's so it's fine if a
woman says that to a guy, But ifyou as a guy are not confident
enough that you like you're you're scared, like you're,
you're showing insecurities in that way to a woman.
Not attractive. Yeah, right.
So it doesn't work. It doesn't work both ways but.

(16:22):
You just got to know you're a baddie.
Yeah, All right, let me see where we're at.
OK. What do women bring to the
table? Episode 58?
This was a good I the worst question.
That question, yeah, it's still to this day, it's still dumb.
It's very guys are the Princess mindset.

(16:44):
Yeah, not understanding. Servant leadership at all?
And what did you provide me that's basically saying to a
woman, like, how are you going to be my servant when it should
be if you're the leader, if you're the masculine man, a
woman should be asking a man what he brings to the table.
Right, exactly. And he's like this.

(17:04):
It's like, like I said in the episode, it's a a woman is like
a magnificent piece of art. You're not like what it do
though. Right, but what does it do for
me? Yeah, like what can I do with
this? You can admire this this
beautiful thing and take care of.
It for what it is, yeah. Not like what it do.

(17:25):
Yeah, I mean, I don't think evenwomen should ask men what men
bring to the table. I don't think anybody should ask
that question. Because if you don't talk to
somebody and you, if you can't figure out for yourself what
someone brings to the table there you need to work on some
other things. Yeah, but a man should tangibly
bring things to the table, right?
He should make money. But she.
Can know. That she should.

(17:46):
Know because she knows what he does for his work.
She's been around him and knows how his character is.
Yeah, she should know these things by how he's acting.
Exactly. Rather than his word.
No, no. Yeah, yeah.
You don't even have to ask that question.
Actions. Over words in general.
But a woman doesn't need to bring anything to the table.
She just needs to be her beautiful self, feminine self.
She just needs to be feminine. Like a woman has value just

(18:08):
being a woman. Being feminine.
Is value. A man has to create his value in
this world. And that's what it is.
Like a woman's value can be lostby losing her innocence, by
losing the purity that she has, right?
A man has to create his value inlife.
OK, Yeah. All right.

(18:31):
We are breaking up episode 59. It was just about break UPS, not
about us actually breaking. Up.
No. Yeah, I knew that.
You knew that? Yeah, but the.
But we were talking about breakups.
How Yeah, don't like, go into a full spiel, Just accept it.
Yeah. Or just be like, OK, we're
breaking up. For a guy to be like, we talked

(18:53):
about the threat, like when a woman says I'm breaking up with
you and you're like, OK, cool. Right?
Because look, she's made-up her mind like, or she's using it as
a manipulation tactic, right? And if she gets all upset, I
can't believe you said OK, cool.Like, don't you?
You can't threaten to break up. Yeah, if you're like, hey, we
need to have a talk because I'm not happy.
That's different than I would. Break up with somebody if they

(19:14):
threaten to break up with me in order to not break up with me.
Right. Yeah, because it's just straight
up manipulation, right? Yeah, but a lot of guys fall for
that. No, I'm just.
Yeah. That's why it's like the most
powerful thing you can do is say, OK, cool, right?
Like, yeah. And.
Then and then move on. Yeah, like actually move on.
Yeah. And then, you know, if she is
bluffing, then she'll come back and.

(19:36):
Then she wants to repair at thatpoint, Yeah, then that's up to
you to decide. The highest chance of.
But of her changing her mind then because and then you have
to be like, you cannot threaten me with breaking up in order to
get what you want. Yeah, that was the one and last
time that that will ever happen.So yeah, next time you're you're
in or you're out like my, my parents, she was supposed to
say, are you in or you're out? Can't be, can't be letting the

(19:59):
air conditioning, can't be letting the air conditioning
out. If you guys are out, you're out.
All right, Episode 60, if they need personal space, it's a bad
sign. Yeah, I mean, people, again, I'm
not trying to like attack people's relationships or

(20:21):
anything, but if you want to be away from your partner, yeah.
You need a break. Someone who valued before this
relationship my me time. My alone time.
Yeah, if that is more appealing to you than spending time with
your partner. Your relationship needs work.
Yeah, it should be our alone time, right?
And it doesn't mean you don't dothings like we said.

(20:43):
Hey, I go for a run, I go to thegym.
We also go to the gym together. But you don't like running?
I don't like I go to dance. I don't like shaking my ass at
Madhouse. You would like it.
OK, I would, but you know, but you go and you do that, you
know, and it's like, so you do have time or you have time when
you're hanging out with your friends, right?
But you don't need alone time where you're like, I don't want

(21:03):
to be around anyone, right, including my spouse.
That if that's the case, then there's something broken with
your relationship because all that time that you have, you
should be wanting to spend it with them.
Right, right. And that can be fixed.
You just got to figure out what's causing you to want space
from your partner, because it's probably some sort of resentment
for something swept under the rug.
Yeah, but you can get back to that.

(21:24):
Like your partner should be yourbest friend and like who doesn't
want to spend all their time with their best friends?
And that's why COVID destroyed so many cause so many divorces,
right? Because people were.
Forced to be together. And then, yeah, so that's a bad
sign like that. Like that's that's what we're
trying to prevent. Right, if you can't spend time
with each other like that, you you need to look at your

(21:46):
relationship with a microscope and figure out.
What's going on, if you even arelike, oh, I just need to get
need to get a break from my partner or get away for a little
bit. Yeah, that's a bad sign that's
going down that. Path.
There's resentment. There is love enough.
Maybe not Episode 61, I don't know.
Oh, Oh yeah, we talked about like if, if, if love can get you

(22:09):
through everything. Or is it situation or
circumstances? And I think we said love wins.
Yeah, I think love is enough. And I think we said that, you
know, because I think it true love, I think that's what we
classified it as, is true love. Because people say that love is
not enough, but they're neglecting all these other

(22:31):
things. And it's like if those things
really matter to you, you can still love a person and not be
with them. So like, if you married somebody
that isn't really financially literate and he's trying to lead
and he just doesn't get it, but you love them, it's like if
that's really that big of a dealwhere you feel like love isn't

(22:52):
enough, that his financial illiteracy is ruining the
relationship, then you shouldn'thave made that decision, right?
You know what I mean? Like, that's not true love
because true love is loving somebody for who they are right
now. And like, people could be in the
same situation and he's still not financially literate, but

(23:13):
she's like, we'll figure it out or he'll figure it out.
I trust him, whatever. And still that is enough because
she truly loves him. She loves him for his life.
But he's got to be able to love his success.
So actually I take it back now. Now I think love is not enough
because I'll tell you why, because I'm thinking about that
situation as you're talking about that.
It's like as a man, like you gotto like, you got to perform like

(23:36):
you got there's, you got to be the leader.
You got to do like your relationship will die if it's
just based on love. Like there's also performative
actions that must happen, right?You have to have boundaries.
You have to be a leader like youhave to do.
You have to invest in a relationship and learn and grow.
If you're just like, oh, we justlove each other, you're gonna

(23:56):
have a dysfunctional relationship which will
eventually dissolve. But I guess I just.
The development needs to be there.
That comes with the territory oflove, of true love, true love.
If you truly love someone. You want to be the best version
for them. You want to better yourself, you
want to do stuff for them. You care about what they say.
That's. Why it's true.
Love the chicken or the egg. True.

(24:17):
Love is enough, but not just love.
Not like familiar love or friendlove or this love that's like
romantic but it's a lower level.Love is willing to do all the
things that you can in order to do the best for your partner,
right? You want the best.
If you're not in that mindset, then you might be in love with
someone or you might love that they love you right but or be

(24:40):
attracted to them. But you're not truly in love
with them if you're not willing to make changes in your life for
grow for them. Exactly.
Yeah, well, just like we don't yell at each other, call each
other names. Like that's not something that I
even think about doing. It's something that naturally
happens because I have such a high level of love and respect
for you. That's what I'm trying to say.

(25:01):
It's like there's plenty of people who yell at each other
and call each other names that even love each other, but it's
not that high of a level of loveif you can even do those things.
Right, if you're. Not thinking about.
Without working on trying to improve and not do those things.
Right. I mean.
Cuz you could be even. Then I feel like.
You haven't reached that level of love.

(25:23):
Yeah, yeah, which you could work.
Towards which is just in generalin life of love, of life of
people, of being a loving person, because the loving
person does not want to see other people.
Yeah, it doesn't spread no matter what.
Hate. Yeah.
No matter what they've done, youdon't want to see them hurt,
right? Like, yes, maybe you they need
discipline, but it's further but, but that's the difference

(25:44):
between discipline and punishment.
We talked about this before too,is that discipline is for their
own good, right? Punishment is for your enjoyment
of their suffering, right? Right.
That's what it is like as a parent, if you punish your
child, it's for your enjoyment of their suffering.
If you discipline your child, it's because you're doing it for
their own good. So you don't wish harm on them.
Like even someone who's done bad, like even a criminal who's

(26:04):
committed a crime or did something harmful to you, you
would seek discipline for them or some correction for their own
goods so that they can can become better, not for your
revenge then, you know, so you haven't reached that level of
love as a human being if you're still seeking that.
You know, which was the whole problem that with the whole
thing that happened with the Charlie Kirk thing, was that

(26:27):
people were, you know, seeking harm.
They're fighting fire with fire,and everything was on fire.
Yeah, whether you like them or not.
Like it's like, OK, if there's no world in which I accept any
kind of stance where you would say that oh, good that that
happened or be happy that someone else is suffering.
Like there's no, it doesn't matter who it was.
It doesn't matter if it was on the other side of the fence or

(26:50):
what it was like anyone, whoeveris wanting, like enjoying
someone else's pain, that says alot about them as a person.
There's no world in which that'sgood.
I agree so, but we're not going to go down this tangent.
Further. So we got to stay on track.
But OK. Oh, this is a good one.
Women are supposed to be difficult.

(27:12):
Episode 62. That's right.
Yeah, we are. We're a challenge.
Men like challenge, but not a challenge intentionally.
Like you're not mean to your husband or whatever to give him
a challenge. No, but men and women are
different. Yeah, it's difficult sometimes
for me to understand your guy logic, just like it's difficult

(27:34):
for men to understand women logic.
Well, and a woman, I think we talk about this too, always has
to test a man. Right.
She's going to continually. There's no point in which she
doesn't test you, no matter how much you've proven yourself.
And it's not an insult to you, it's just that it makes her feel
safe, right? That she's got.
She knows exactly that you're. Still that strong guy and so
she. Said earlier that women need to

(27:55):
piss the guy off to see how he acts.
Yeah, and they got to keep on testing it to see because you
won't. You might turn crazy.
One day. Yeah, you won't feel safe if
there's no boundaries, if if youfeel like the guy can just be
pushed over. Yeah.
That's true. So it's supposed to be that way.
And it's a good thing. And and and and and women.
Should view it as a good. Thing and it makes the man

(28:16):
stronger, right? Like it.
Like the things that that that you what doesn't.
Kill you makes you. Stronger, yeah.
Have those things have made me stronger?
So all right, we discovered something amazing we were
missing. Episode 63.
What is it? Community.
This was because of the. John and Sabrina's wedding.

(28:38):
Yeah. So I think that was important.
That's true, yeah. That is one that we really
didn't like. We had friends, but we didn't
have like, such a big group. Yeah.
That even now we've like continued to expand right like
our friend group and things likethat, but we're very intentional
with who we like to spend time with you.

(28:59):
And I think that was the first time that we were around a lot
of people that for the most partwere also seem very intentional
and very, you know, aware and wanting to grow and things like
that. And there's obviously been some
things that happened though since that episode.
And it's, I don't want to discredit the importance of

(29:21):
community because it is very important.
And we did learn that and it's important to have that community
still. But even sometimes you feel like
you get a community and there might be people in there that
you didn't really know how they were.
But that doesn't mean to get ridof the whole community or like
the aspect of community. Like it's still very important.

(29:44):
Obviously it's important to haveboundaries.
And like, if you find something out about somebody that doesn't
really align with you, you're, you can still be like, OK, I
don't think, you know, we we canbe as close as previously had
thought. But it's, it's still very
important to have group of people that you can rely on,

(30:07):
Yeah. And that you feel aligned with
and. Yeah, you have shared values,
right, Because it also reinforces because especially
with the traditional relationship, the world is
against us. Yeah, most of society does not
like what we're doing, right. They they don't, they don't
agree with it. They think they're gonna tell
you as a one, No, he's he's financially abusing you and
suppressing you. Yeah.

(30:28):
And and whatever they're gonna tell me as a man.
Oh, you know. She's just gonna take all your
money. Exactly, and that's not and
leave you as a it's not accurate.
Yeah, I mean, or it's like, oh, it should be 5050 and, and all
of these things, right? And it's the, you need the
people that understand, right. And and then I think that's also
important is like just the aspect of if your friends are

(30:49):
into trouble, they're not, then you're going to get into
trouble. Right.
Well, I was going to say, I wantto clarify that.
Like when I say that people are aligned with us, I don't mean
that they have to believe everything we believe and live
the way we live. No, even though that obviously
is going to be kind of like an easier connection to make.
I mean, morally, yeah, we align because it's like we can have

(31:12):
gay friends, we can have people that are in 5050 relationships,
like that is not an issue. But morally, if they're doing
things that we do not agree withor, you know, they're not living
from a place of integrity or things like that, that is what

(31:33):
causes the disconnect. Not like different walks of
different people, because I think it's important to have
different walks of people of life in your life, but you have
to be morally aligned and like in your integrity and things
like that that matter. Well, and, and I think though
that you do still have to have people that are also in

(31:53):
traditional relationship like no, I can you can, you can have
your circle be expanded, but youneed to have some core group of
people that are an alignment in your value systems and beliefs.
Well. They help understand more like
truly what you're going through the most.
So yeah, I agree. Let's see, you need more
conflict in your relationship. Here's why.

(32:13):
Episode 64. More.
Conflict. Yeah, I think we were talking
about. Like you got to actually talk
about the stuff and not sweep itunder the rug.
Yeah, we talked about why tolerance destroys love and how
confronting conflict. Makes you stronger.
Head on builds on shaple bond Yeah exactly.
So cuz cuz tolerance was The thing is like tolerating if

(32:35):
you're tolerating behavior things, you know, suppressing
the things instead of just talking about them.
Yeah. Are you tolerating A burp or
it's? Suppressing.
Not supposed to tell my secret, but no.
Yeah, a lot of these, if people haven't picked up on it, are
about resentment, right? Yeah, cuz that's what we

(32:56):
discovered in doing this podcastwas the number one killer of
relations. We did episode on that.
But yeah, resentment is the biggest thing that you have to
avoid cuz that's what that's what does it.
That's true a brutal truth to young women about how to attract
versus keep a man. So this was the episode 65 The
young women which. Is basically use your looks to

(33:18):
your advantage while you can, and if you find a good man
settled, don't be afraid to settle down with him.
Yeah, yeah, I don't if you wasteyour your time, you know, but
don't, don't settle early just to settle.
But if you find a good guy, don't be like, I'm still young,
I can still party because. But I do think women still need
some time on their own cuz I feel like a lot of women that

(33:41):
aren't truly single or live on their own, they're not gonna
make the best decision for themselves long term
romantically because they're more codependent.
Yes, yeah. And they don't understand and
like. And then they won't value like a
man taking care of them. It's like if you haven't gone
they. Just went from parents to man.

(34:03):
Yeah, you got to work some shitty job 1st and then some guy
rescues you and you're like, oh,I appreciate the money.
Otherwise you might be a little bit of a spoiled brat.
And it's like, oh, like the money just comes.
I just get money. It just, you know, we just go on
trips to. Learn from life's experiences.
Yes, yeah. And.
Then it helps them make better decisions.
Yeah, but yeah. That's why I don't think they

(34:25):
should get married too young. Honestly.
I think I said 25 was like a good age.
Yeah, I think I'm fine with that.
Yeah. So yeah, that gives them plenty
of time to get their stuff together, and they're in a
little. And also, and they do need to
understand that their attractiveness will diminish
with time. Like it's just it's going to
happen. Like it happens to all of us.
But for women, it affects them more.

(34:47):
Like you cannot be. He's calling me an old tag over
here. This is not except for you now.
You added it well, but the key thing is though, what's
important about that is that if you find the right man in his
eyes. And he will always be beautiful
to. Him, in his eyes you will always

(35:07):
be, no matter what. Well, I'll always be younger
than you. Well, yeah, that's true, but you
will always be radiantly beautiful to him.
So find that guy because. That helps with the witchcraft.
Though Yeah, yeah, it helps withthe witchcraft.
But but you know, but that time is like, I think the biggest
thing was that women, sometimes women, young women are given the

(35:29):
wrong message. And even like, you know, I
showed you some clips from that whatever podcast.
I don't always like what's on there, but there's some real
truths there where he has women on there all the time and he
asks them to rate themselves andthey always rate themselves A10.
And then he asks them questions like it, do you think you'll be
more attractive or less attractive in 10 years?
And then they always say more attractive.
And then he says 20 years and they still say a lot of them.

(35:50):
I mean, some of them tell the truth, but most of them say more
attractive and they really believe this.
And there's a ton of women that believe this, and it's because
they've been told this. Men say the same things too,
though. It's not the same though.
It's not the same. Not all men age well.
No, not all men, but they but they they can like it's, it's a
different, it's a different thing, right?
You know there's a reason why there's daddy vibes, right?

(36:12):
Yeah, but that's only certain men.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you could be that guy.
But what I'm saying is though, that it's just a lot of women
are given the wrong message. They don't understand that the
the youth and beauty that they have is a resource that they
should capitalize on because it will diminish over time.
I. Agree, but how do you tell a
woman that without making her insecure?

(36:34):
Well, because she should realizethat that better not be the only
attribute that she has, so she better work on other attributes.
I agree. OK.
And that while she does have that attribute, she needs to use
that to her advantage because she's not always gonna have that
attribute, right? Just like, look, I'm not always
gonna have my knees, you know, I'm not always wearing.

(36:56):
Her knees. I'm not always be able to run
marathons or lift weights like I'm getting older, Like when I
hit 70, I'm not gonna be as strong.
And as you're gonna go, OK, I'm gonna run, but I'm not gonna be
as strong. I'm not gonna have the same kind
of strength that I have now. I'm not gonna have the same kind
of heck. Oh, you know what I would have
wish I would have. Someone would have told me when

(37:16):
I was younger that when you're 40, you're not going to have the
energy that you had because I would have worked a little
harder at building a business because it's a lot harder to
work those 12 hour days. Now, those are those.
These are realities of life. Yeah.
So Eve is as. That's why we called it, brutal
truth. Yes.

(37:37):
And then brutal truth to older women about how to attract
versus Keep a man Episode 66. John thinks you're an old hag
now and the rest of men, but youhave your sparkling personality
to win men over. Well, yeah, you better not have
all this baggage, right, becausebecause you lost some of the

(37:59):
beauty and youth that you had. That's true.
Like you can't, that's not goingto come back with with Botox and
fillers and all that stuff like.I don't know these new age.
Facelifts, Yeah, actually I takethat the new age facelifts,
yeah, OK, if you got the like 50grand for the new age facelift,
then maybe, but but even then you shouldn't be relying on on

(38:19):
that, right? It's like it.
Should not even ever. Like, I guess my issue is that I
hate even talking about this because it shouldn't be all
about looks, like. And I know it's not, and I know
that's not what you're saying, but like, women are already so
afraid to get old. And then when you hear guys be

(38:39):
like, oh, yeah, when you hit thewall at 27, you know, you better
have all this other stuff because you're ugly now.
It's like that's just. Well, but that's an extreme.
It's not like it's extreme. But a lot of men talk about it.
And but there is a point where every woman will wake up and she
will realize that she's not thatyoung hot 20 year old that she

(39:01):
was, and now she has to deal with the reality of life like
that's just how it's going to be.
Which I don't think that that's not like what women face, right?
I think it's like, how do you hear men talk about young
attractive women all day and then when you are old and you
can't do anything about it, how are you supposed to feel
confident that your man even still likes?

(39:23):
You well, but the the that's what the younger women don't
hear the message, that's the thing.
But the older women the message is is that especially if you're
single and you're older, you should you better not have all
of this like you better be feminine.
You better like you can't be this and demand all the stuff
that that maybe you could when you're younger.

(39:43):
You could get away with being annoying and being feminist and
and all of these things because guys would tolerate it because
of your youth and beauty. But at that point, you better be
a lot more agreeable. They don't tolerate it.
You may not be a frog farmer at that point because you know what
I'm saying, But again, I think it's important that makes.

(40:04):
Me feel like is personality evenreally enough for men then if
they value no so highly? No, that's what we're talking
about. Yeah, so when you lose your
looks, though, how as an older woman, am I supposed to feel
like that's. Enough, but you're not a single
older woman. So it's only if you're single.
Yeah, yeah. That's what this whole thing was

(40:25):
directed towards. Maybe that's a miscommunication
was that this is sort of single women.
It's not towards. It's not towards you.
Feel that every man man thinks similar to what you're saying.
So like women's fear is that menwill find a younger, more
attractive woman and run away. And that is what happens a lot
of the time. No, a woman who has been

(40:48):
faithful and loyal to a man and gives him her feminine energy is
that above looks is eternally youthful and beautiful.
Is that above looks? Yeah, it's above looks at that.
At that point, you're. Confidently saying that.
Yes, in in a relationship, in a committed long term
relationship. And you think you married the
guy? Say that.
Yeah, I would say that most men are starved for respect.

(41:12):
Most men do not have a woman that it truly admires him looks
up to them that that is feminineand soft to him, like he would
value all those things above looks for.
Sure, and if you think he got those things he wouldn't get
bored of that or take that for granted and then want the other
stuff. Nope.

(41:33):
Nope, absolutely not. Because that's what what men
really, truly want. Now, if you're single, it's a
different thing because you can't present that part of it to
overcome the looks part initially because he's going to
get a girl that has looks and has that because those are out
there too. So that's what I'm saying is
that like you better have that part if you're older and single.

(41:54):
It's true, right? I mean, think if you can get
both things, why would you choose one?
So but I. Understand because women would
make the same decision. Right.
Of course women would make the same decision.
But, but I think it's good that you said that because if you are
with a man, right, like to me, you'll be eternally beautiful
and youthful to me, you know, because of who you are and

(42:17):
because of the relationship thatwe have, because it transcends
the looks. Yeah, it's just kind of hard to
believe sometimes as a woman because you're you're saying all
the things that a lot of men sayabout the looks being so
important. So it's really hard to, I
believe that that's not the caseeven if you have the other
things. Does that make?

(42:37):
Sense. Yeah, it's because the imprint
of you in my mind is permanent. So I always see you just as
beautiful and young as as you were kind of.
Mentioned that if you think the same way that I think cuz I feel
like you don't age so maybe that's.
But it's because of our relationship, you know, that's
why so, but I think that's. Because I'm a get old.

(42:59):
I don't. I ain't doing no facelift.
That sounds painful. Yeah, I wouldn't want you to do
that. I wouldn't like that.
I'd like to see you gracefully age.
Hopefully it's graceful and not like a Mack.
Truck it it well and well I meanthey also like take care of
yourself like don't get fat don't like like not I'm not

(43:20):
talking to you specifically. I mean, it's like just like for
anyone, yeah, be like take care of yourself.
Like you can age gracefully. Like there's no, no reason why
so. And, and that should be a
beautiful thing is aging gracefully and and not having to
like do all these things to to try and chase the thing, but.
It's like Carrie Bradshaw, like I'm I'm and Pamela Anderson,

(43:41):
like, it's very inspiring to seecelebrities do that because it's
so easy. They can go get a Kris
Kardashian facelift and look just like they did a long time
ago, but they're aging like their body is supposed to.
Yeah. Yeah, OK.

(44:03):
Episode 67, modern traditional relationships.
This one was with John and Sabrina, our first guest.
Yes, yeah, So that was cool. And we talked about modern
traditional relationships. But they also have a modern
traditional relationships. And then episode 68, we still
had them back on the show and wesaid, can the right relationship
heal you? Yeah.

(44:24):
And actually I've been seeing more and more.
I won't go too in depth because I know we got a lot to go
through, but I've been seeing more and more people like
therapists and things like that on the Internet talk about how
that's the only way. And we've talked about it too,
that you can truly get as close to healing yourself completely
as possible. Because like you said, when

(44:44):
you're on your own, you don't. You don't touch on a lot of the
points because you don't have to.
There's no one there poking those points or reflecting them
back to you. But when you're in a
relationship, that's when you can do the most transformative
healing. I truly believe that.
And that's what they talk about as well, too.
I can't reach certain parts of my own back to scratch them.

(45:08):
Like you can't reach certain parts of your own depth.
You need someone else to do it for.
You. I thought you were implying that
I am forced to scratch your back.
You're like, yeah, I can't scratch my back, so you have to
do. It the depth all right.
Hard Advice to men in their 20s Episode 69.

(45:29):
Oh, how fitting. Yeah.
What was the hard advice? Do you remember?
Let's see. Be a man, I'm sure.
Take a pride. Yeah, I think that's a man,
basically. What other things?
It's your responsibility. Let me see with that.
Everything's your fault. Oh yeah yeah basically yeah Why

(45:51):
traditional relationship advice fails men and how to truly
prepare for lasting love baggageWhy starting fresh can be an
advantage how to develop emotional intelligence without
extensive dating experience critical skills men need to
master what is financial stability like you have to make
money in order to well. And be able to handle money,

(46:14):
yeah. Yeah, but, and basically I was
telling guys in their 20s like, don't get married, don't get
into a serious relationship until you're in your 30s.
Yeah. Like focus on like getting your
shit together, you know? Makes sense?
And then and then it's hard thatlike.
Being a man, it's. Hard.
It's going to be competitive, like you are going to have to

(46:34):
outperform other men. But if.
You're a good man. Like if you learn how to be a
good masculine man, you are a you're a Unicorn.
All right, episode 70, she's coming for your husband.
Oh, that was with the lady that was like, mad at some comment.
Yeah, commenter. So she like, went and found the
lady's husband. Yeah.

(46:54):
D Ming. D Ming, People's Husbands.
And you said majority of people's husbands would respond.
Would fall for it, yeah. And so I'm sure you said that
women need to test the temperature of their
relationship. The thermometer, because they're
the thermostats, yeah. Whip that man and.
Like you should know whether or not that like that

(47:16):
relationship's tight enough thatif some chick however hot she
was, message your husband he would ignore that.
DM if you don't know that for. Absolutely confirm.
This. Yeah, you've.
Seen that happen? Message John.
Yeah, but yeah. But like if you don't know that
as a woman, you're that like, and then it's kind of on you a

(47:38):
little bit because you should know that you should like, if
you're not sure, you better findout like and don't.
It doesn't mean like test it. It means like build the
relationship like. Have a conversation.
Exactly. Yeah.
All men should read this book, Episode 71.
I think it was the way of the superior man.
Yeah, we still have to do one onthe masculine relationship.

(47:59):
You have to read. That one, yeah, yeah, Men should
read Way of the Superior Man. Yeah.
OK, this one book holds the key to ending fights with Your man
forever episode 72. The Queen's code.
Or was it the. Yeah, it was the Queen's Code, I
think. We didn't do an episode on the
the Empowered Wife. This was on the Queen's Code.

(48:21):
I think we didn't do one on the Empowered wife because we had
already done one on the Surrendered Wife, if I remember
correctly. But.
But yeah, but that's a really good book.
The Queen's Code. Yeah, Seriously.
Good. Yeah, that was where we talked
about the the the frog farmer. Yeah, yeah.
But yeah, women really need to read that book.
By Allison Armstrong. Yeah #73 unpacking adolescence.

(48:46):
How the Netflix hit show exposesthe red pill crisis.
That was a lot. Yeah, that's it.
Just shows how messed up though that men hating women has come
in society that children. Granted, this isn't an actual

(49:06):
event that happened, but it could.
And it has. There are actual events that are
very similar that have happened for sure.
Yeah, I mean, I mean, it happensall the time.
It's mostly adolescent or young men shooting people, causing,
ending people's lives. I mean, it's usually men in
general, period. But so like as men, I guess my

(49:30):
thing is, as men it is your responsibility to help actually
guide men in the right direction.
And with the red pill stuff, it's causing more hate and more
problems rather than actually helping men and young boys.
Right. Exactly.

(49:50):
Yeah. So like that's on men because
men aren't going to listen to women anyway.
And men who hate women, the red pill community definitely aren't
going to listen to women. So it's on men to try to help
these people understand in a healthy, proper way how to be a
man, not just be fuelled by hate.

(50:12):
And then now our children are learning these things exactly
from a young age, and then they get hopeless.
They hate women from teenage years.
You think they're gonna magically stop hating them?
No, and then it's just even justin general that whole like
dehumanizing people, right, right.
So it's like love should be the message.
If you're like dehumanizing people, you think that whoever

(50:35):
it is even political like this person's bad, they're evil.
They're that's then it allows violence to be done to them like
that. That's the number one propaganda
that's always used in a war in order to make it OK to kill the
enemy is like like our for murder, you know, or slaughter
of people is dehumanizing them, right?
And it's never OK. Yeah, and that's what happens.

(50:57):
That's unfortunately that's whatRed Pill does, is it makes
women's thoughts, right. That's the terminology that hoe
over there, right? Like they they say things.
You didn't know what that meant.I don't listen to all those like
words. Yeah, but it's like those those
kind of words, right? It's like, that's what.
Yeah. Why are they inventing these
words? Because those are.

(51:18):
Just other ones. Those are just.
Four O 3 or three O 4. Yeah, yeah, three O 4 it's like.
You guys need to realize you're making words and terms that like
no one else is paying attention.To It's dehumanizing.
It's dehumanizing, but it's alsolike immature, like a man
wouldn't do that. Have you ever heard a man call
someone a thought? Yeah, a man.

(51:40):
A real man. No.
Or a three O 4. Right, Yeah.
And but it doesn't help also though on the other side of it
real quick is that when the whole women versus bear thing
came or men versus bear like I'dchoose the bear that was also
dehumanizing moment where women dehumanize men.
Yeah, you know, like was not good because.

(52:01):
I mean, they use their fear to justify that behavior.
They're afraid of men. Yeah, well, fear like you
there's you're either moving in the direction of fear or love,
not both. Every action that you ever do is
always motivated by either fear or love.
And so you have to choose love. And that's that's the thing.
Speaking of which, one of my favorite episodes, How

(52:24):
forgiveness saved our Relationship and How it can Save
yours. Episode 74, The Power You.
Have to forgive, yeah and and wipe clean.
Yeah, forgiving is forgetting, right?
I think that a lot of people hold on to the.
And the proper way to apologize and.
Yeah, yeah, that's suit. Like if you watch one episode, I
think that's one of the most powerful episodes to change your

(52:47):
life. That's true.
Because a lot of people are holding on to stuff.
Right, empty your backpack. Yeah, stop carrying around all
your hurt and forgive people. But this was a good one.
This was Nicole's brilliance. Why Men are Dumb and Women are
Crazy. The surprising truth about
relationships. Right, because men are singular
focused and women are what is itmulti focused?

(53:10):
Yeah, I forget what she called the actual term, but basically
men can only think about one thing at a time where women can
multitask. And so men come across dumb just
to give a brief summary because they can only they only focus on
one thing at a time. And women, what is it?
Men are dumb and women are crazybecause she's thinking about a

(53:31):
million things at one time. Like I might say to you like, Oh
my God, next Tuesday, should I wear this red raincoat or this
yellow raincoat? And you're like, what?
You're why are you even thinkingabout Tuesday?
It's freaking Thursday. That seems crazy to you.
But or we might be in some situation where I'm like, John,
what do we do? And you're like, but wait, where

(53:53):
are my keys? And I'm like, why are you
worried about your keys right now, right?
Because you focus on. Right.
Like it's that aspect. The crazy part for the women
though was about the emotions. But because women experience a
greater degree of emotions and so.
I mean, it's emotions, but I think it's also like doing
multiple things at one time thatdon't.

(54:14):
It's not going to make sense to men because they're thinking in
one tracked mind. Yeah, if you're getting
actually, I'm running out of time, But if you're getting fat
in your relationship, listen to this episode 76.
It's basically the same of what you said earlier is in the terms
of like take care of yourself. As you go into old age, you

(54:35):
should take care of yourself anyway you should so you can
live a long time, Yeah. It is respectful to your
partner. It's disrespectful to your
partner if you just don't care about how you look like.
Would your partner leave you if you got sick?
Episode 77. They shouldn't.
Shouldn't masculine and feminineroles and the alchemy alchemical

(54:59):
journey with the golden life? This was David.
And. His wife?
Yeah. I forgot her name.
Am I? Trying this summer?
Oh. David and Alyssa Alyssa I.
Was like trying. To we talked about their the
fight language she talked about and yeah, toxic relationship

(55:21):
survival guide episode 79. So we talked about toxic
relationships. Right, which I feel like it's
pretty self-explanatory. So go watch that if you feel
like you're in a toxic relationship.
Yeah, yeah. If you keep on breaking up with
someone and getting back together, you're in a toxic
relationship. Yes.
Hello I'm feeling like what's this like what's the guy in so I

(55:49):
married an axe murderer. I.
Don't. Know OK are women's standards
too high or are men just mediocre?
Episode 80 That was a good one about like.
Both. It's yeah, both, yeah.
And I think we explained that further in that episode.
How AI will affect the future ofrelationships in dating episode
81 we kind of talked about. That I just hope ChatGPT doesn't

(56:13):
kill me one day. But I think it might be good
that a lot of guys that might have caused trouble in the world
will just be happy with their AIgirlfriend.
That's a good thing and that's sad though.
And again, as men, that should make you guys sad that as a man,

(56:34):
you know, that it's better that some of these guys that are
problematic are better off with not real women.
Yeah. Like, I agree with you.
That is the best case scenario. But that's sad.
Yeah. And as a man, I feel like if I
was a man, you're a man. And I know you're on this
mission to help men be better. Right.
But more men should be on that mission.

(56:55):
Yeah. Like you shouldn't want to be.
I would be sad if I was like, yeah, some women are gonna have
to just be with robots. And I'm sure that's that's a
reality as well too, but that would make me sad.
That would that would make me more so want to be like, no,
like you can be feminine and be your true version of yourself.
Like come learn this thing. You know what I mean?
So. I have to I have to send a text

(57:17):
because I'm late for a a meeting.
We just go off on too many tangents.
Yeah. But yeah, I mean, I agree with
you that it would be better for those men to end up with
something that keeps them fulfilled and out of trouble,

(57:38):
but it's just really sad. Yeah, and I do.
It is sad like that. That shouldn't be the way that
things are going to go. I do think it's not.
Going to be good for the population.
It's better than violence, so. Yeah, because.
That's what's going to happen ifif things kept going that way.
It is better than violence, but I do think we're going to see
less and less babies. Oh yeah?
Well, the population is going toshrink dramatically at some

(58:00):
point here very soon. Women have gotten out of
control. It needs to stop.
Episode 82. This is The Secret Life of
Mormon wives. Yeah, this was when you had that
eye opening awakening moment of seeing how.
It's not even, it wasn't even really eye opening and
awakening. It just was very hypocritical
and I'm like, we can't do that. Women get away with being

(58:22):
hypocritical and that's really not OK like.
Yeah, you can't be like, oh, we can go to a Chippendales, but Oh
my God, if a man goes to a stripclub or if he looks at another
woman, like what if he turns hishead and checks out a woman?
Well, wait a minute. But if you're going to
Chippendales or Magic Mike's or whatever, you're just having
fun, OK? There's a problem.
Can't be bossy and controlling as a woman and then like not

(58:46):
expect somebody to be fed up with that.
Because no woman would tolerate A bossing controlling right?
And if she is with one, then sheprobably doesn't know how to get
out of that situation. Yeah, And if a man has
boundaries and standards, that'snot controlling and domineering
and insecure. It's like he's like, no, I don't
want you doing this right. Like he's supposed to be the
leader. You can't be like.

(59:07):
Right. And you can't manipulate him
being like you're you're just not being fair.
Like that's horrible. Like, yeah, no, that's not OK.
Yeah, it's like you're controlling me, keeping me OK.
Lies about marriage that hurt men.
This is the Psych Hacks episode where he where we went through
that. We went through the whole video

(59:27):
so that would be 1 to go and watch because we went through
like section by section. Yeah, yeah.
He was calling men workhorses that and that was the issue.
But you don't owe anyone anything.
Episode 84 I think that speaks for.
A good philosophy just in general.
What happens when a woman compliments a man?

(59:49):
This is what? Lana.
Lana Rico. Yeah.
So that was good. That was a good one.
Yeah. Cuz she talked a lot about how
men don't get complimented. And I don't think women even
really think about that. We're used to being the ones
that get complimented. And she really put in
perspective how a compliment makes men feel and that you can
actually use it to to your advantage and you should be

(01:00:11):
complimenting men that you enjoyand care about.
Yeah. Women should wait three months
before sex. That was also with Lana Rico.
Yeah, and she changed your mind.On that she did.
I agreed with that. Like, OK, I mean, that's a long
time, but it does make sense theway she put it.
A man will definitely be invested if he waits that long.
Yeah, yeah. And I think if you're the right

(01:00:31):
woman of, of that, of a femininewoman of that, yeah, then it.
You have to be high caliber for a man to wait that.
Long he's got to be like why like is this woman worth right
you know it's like people will people will wait in line
overnight for that new iPhone yeah I mean that's because
they're not going to do that forlike a you know a normal phone

(01:00:53):
right so SIM culture OF and pay pigs are rooting society again
that. Men can complain about all those
things, yet men are paying for those things again.
Yeah, 15 most common relationship myths debunked.
That one was like a whole list of things, so.

(01:01:15):
The only way to win your wife back.
Nothing else will work. Episode 89.
Having standards breaking up with her if necessary.
Yeah, you have to actually be a man.
Yeah, like trying to just beg toget her background.
Yeah. The crazy things.
And that was a really good episode.
Like if you do if you are havingtrouble.

(01:01:37):
Yeah. Like we went in depth on how to
when your wife back OK the crazythings women will do for rock
stars and rappers episode 90. That one wasn't that long ago.
No, that was a lot of but a lot of crazy.
Like it just shows how status. Yeah, but you shouldn't be
somebody that will throw your morals out the window for a man

(01:01:59):
that has status as a woman. Like it's not, it's not
respectable of yourself. It shows you don't have self
respect. Yeah, men are wired to cheat.
Women are wired for status. Episode 91.
So then we did go even more intodepth of the the chat, the this,

(01:02:20):
the status, the. Chat the chat.
I invented a new thing. It's Chad.
No, don't be like them making words, John.
Is this financial abuse $250,000a year and gives her an
allowance. Episode 92.
I'm just going to add to that I'm not being financially abused
like everyone thinks I am on. Twice if you're being

(01:02:43):
financially abused on Morse codemessage.
TikTok. Oh my God, that's just
ridiculous. But OK, yeah, that one was just
crazy about financial abuse. Like the problem I had also with
the word, like we talked about this before, but abuse the word
abuse, right? Like don't take the power away

(01:03:04):
from that word. Yeah.
Because like people who are actually being abused, like
physically abused or emotionallyabused, when you say financial
abuse, you're lessening their actual.
Like they went you. Know what I mean?
It's like using the R word or stuff like that, Like just to
describe things like that. No, like these are things that
are. Right.
They're serious. You don't use the word unless
you're serious. And then we had the extra dirty

(01:03:26):
truth. Or drink no booze, all pain.
Wheel of Hot Sauce episode 93. Maybe we'll have to bring Wheel
of Hot Sauce back when it maybe not.
Hot sauce? No, I'm not.
That didn't mess up my stomach for a while, but wheel of
something, Yeah, Wheel. We'll, we'll bring the wheel
back in the game. The game would be fun too.
Yeah, the wheel of shots. No needles or.

(01:03:48):
Drinks. Needles.
No. Be like live Nicole getting over
her needles. Number one killer of
relationships no one talks aboutepisode 94.
Resentment. Exactly.
Go watch all those if you're feeling like you got resentment.
How to completely destroy your sex life episode 95.

(01:04:08):
How to completely? That was the guy that like had.
The guy who was like, if you don't do this, I'm going to go
find someone else and you need to watch Korn so that you can
act like that. Exactly.
Yeah, I have to actually episode96 for us, it just came out
today how a man should take careof his women.

(01:04:30):
I'm testing titles on this one. It's like I have the title of,
oh, is it going to show me the title because they add this new
title test feature. I think one of them is like a
kept woman ones like how a man should take care of his woman.
And and then I can't remember what the other one was, but
yeah. So that one was about like

(01:04:50):
actually how to not financially abuse like right.
You know how the what it actually means to.
Take care how to treat your woman well.
Yeah, when you're a good man. Yeah.
And to make sure that when you die, everything's is good that
you. Oh, yeah, that you have
everything set up and that you're not just leaving her
because that's, that was other people's objections.

(01:05:12):
They're like, I've seen women that when their husband dies,
they don't know anything and he left her with nothing to figure
out. Like just figure out all this
stuff. Yeah, and then episode 97, what
was that? After that episode?
It was about some Reddit thing Ithink.

(01:05:32):
Don't you have them on the published thing?
Yeah, we didn't. Think, no, I didn't.
I didn't. This the title.
Yeah, we're like. Because we're ahead of you guys.
Yeah, I don't, I don't recall. Let me look at my notes and
maybe it's 98. Therapy speak.
Fatigue. Oh yeah, yeah, that was 97.

(01:05:53):
I don't know. I have financial set up.
I think, I think it was a therapy speak fatigue.
That's where we're using those words and then 98.
That was a MIS. I don't have it on here.
Did the therapy speak? I know what 99.
Was though. What's 99?
Because that's the one we're missing.

(01:06:13):
That's the one that was. Oh, that's the one we did.
Yeah. Early.
We don't know. 98. Yeah, we're very.
Organized. Yeah.
What was 99? What did we do?
You're the one that has, I know.The things it was the one about
about men like that they if theywant a long term relationship
that they need to go for the sexinstead.

(01:06:34):
Yes, that was 99, Yeah. And then obviously a. 100 I
can't remember what 100 was about.
Was our recap, but before we go,since we don't have a end
segment thing, yeah. What is something that you've
learned while doing the podcast like that we've learned, you've
learned along the way or something that really stood out

(01:06:57):
to you? Doesn't have to be new, but
maybe that you fully or more fully got a grasp on while doing
this. Gosh, there's a lot of things.
I would say that. I mean, the biggest thing is
just the power of not being defensive.

(01:07:18):
I think that's the biggest thingthat I've learned, yeah.
Yeah, and you have done really well with that cuz you went from
being very defensive to not being defensive.
No, that wasn't. Not that's not easy to do
defensive. That's you.
Can tell wrong, it's not easy todo.
Like, I think you're mischaracterizing me just.
Kidding, Just kidding. No, you've done a really good

(01:07:39):
job with that. But yeah, I mean, I think along
the same lines of that, you know, how our conflict
management has evolved from likethe start, You know, we used to
have basically something every week.
Yeah, yeah. And now we don't, and if we do,
it can still be a little intensesometimes, but that's usually

(01:08:01):
because I forgot, you know, to not be defensive or something.
But it's still improved a lot. I feel like even from episode 1,
you know, we have less things that bother us.
We have more open communication and talking about the things.
And, you know, especially I wantyou to be able to talk about,

(01:08:21):
you know, whatever's bothering you.
And I'm working on not being as defensive myself and really
listening to you and being therefor you because I feel like I do
support you and do a lot of goodthings when things are good.
But I want to be able to be there for you and not feel like
our relationship's just gonna crumble, even though I never

(01:08:43):
feel like that. Yeah, it's actually gonna
happen. But it's still like a thing that
scares me, you know? And I feel like that's when
myself sabotage acts up. I'm like, oh, well, it's ruined.
We had an argument. It's ruined.
I know it's OK, whatever, like I'll figure it out somehow, but
that's not the way to be. And so I feel like by facing a

(01:09:04):
lot of this stuff, yeah, it's helped me heal a lot of those
things, and that our communication has gotten better
and conflict resolvement has gotten better.
Yeah, yeah. But you have a call, so it's a
it's time for us to go. Yeah.
But I hope you've enjoyed our 100 and 100.5 episode.

(01:09:28):
Yeah, we hope to crank out. 100 more Yeah, even if no one
watches. Some different balloons for 200.
But I think after doing 100 episodes you're in the like top
10% of podcasts or something andlike most like 90% podcasts
don't make it to 100 episodes. I can believe it, it's been
almost 2. Years.
It might even be 95% I think. So it's been almost two years

(01:09:49):
since we started this so. Haven't missed a week.
But check us out on better than perfect pods.com Yeah, which has
all the other avenues of where you can watch our podcast, like
and share and subscribe and. We'll see you next week.
Tell your friends to watch our stuff and family.
Bye, see you next Tuesday.