201- I Don’t Know Who I Am: Using the Enneagram for Autistic Self-Rediscovery

What if understanding your burnout starts with understanding your why?

In this week’s episode of Beyond Chronic Burnout, Carole Jean Whittington shares how the Enneagram became a powerful guide for self-rediscovery during autistic burnout—and how it can help you or your clients finally make sense of your inner world.

Whether you’ve felt emotionally disconnected, chronically misunderstood, or simply unsure of who you are anymore... this conversation offers clarity, compassion, and practical tools for reconnecting with your true self.

💬 In this episode, you’ll explore:

• What the Enneagram really is—and why it works for autistic minds
  

• How it supports those who experience alexithymia (difficulty identifying emotions)
  

• Why self-understanding is key to burnout recovery
  

• How to identify your Enneagram Type
  

• Ways helping professionals can integrate Enneagram work with neuro-affirming care
  

✨ Plus: A gentle meditation, a downloadable Energy-Honoring Enneagram Assessment, journal prompts, and tips for translating these insights into both your personal healing and your professional practice.

🔗 Resources Mentioned:

The Energy-Honoring Enneagram Assessment (in this week’s issue of The Recharge)
Living Unmasked book + bonus tools: whittingtonwellbeing.com

Subscriber bonus: Enneagram Overview 

🧠 This episode is for you if:

• You’re autistic and feel emotionally disconnected or unsure of who you are
  

• You’re a therapist, clinician, or coach supporting neurodivergent women
  

• You want a deeper, more compassionate lens to navigate burnout and healing
  

🔔 Subscribe + turn on notifications so you never miss an episode of Beyond Chronic Burnout—where we explore what it really means to thrive as autistic women.

🔗 Connect with Carole Jean Whittington: 

How to get out of burnout - STEP 1: Take the Spicy Pepper Burnout Quiz and discover if you are in burnout or not, and if so, what’s your burnout level from a Poblano Pepper Level 1, where there’s just a bit of heat up to the Ghost Pepper Level 5 when “you’re so hot, you’re not.”  You’ll get the opportunity to join our free Step 2 Class after you take the quiz.

Take the Spicy Pepper Quiz: https://energize.whittingtonwellbeing.com/products/courses/view/1155744 

Subscribe to The Recharge Newsletter and receive weekly burnout recovery insights, tools for yourself or to use with your autistic clients, and learn about upcoming workshops at Whittington Well-Being.

🔗 Subscribe to The Recharge: 

https://energyuplevel.kit.com/becomeafan 

🌿 Ready to reconnect with your authentic Self and finally step into your Comfort Zone? Get your copy of Living Unmasked: An Autistic Woman’s Guide to Get Into Your Comfort Zone—and start your journey out of burnout and into sustainable well-being.

✨ Your $9.99 digital + audio bundle includes the full book, exclusive bonus meditations, printable worksheets, and your personalized Roadmap to Energy Mastery.

📘 Grab it here

:https://energize.whittingtonwellbeing.com/products/courses/view/1182513 

You don’t have to hustle your way to healing. Let’s unmask gently, together. 💛

#AutisticBurnout #SelfDiscovery #AutisticWomen #WellBeing #SelfHelp

#NeuroaffirmingCare #BurnoutRecovery #AutisticWomen #TraumaInformedPractice #Enneagram #HelpingProfessionals #ClinicalTools #BeyondChronicBurnout

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Have you ever wondered why you show up the way you do,
especially under pressure? Or why certain things drain you
faster than others? As autistic women, we often
spend so much time masking, adjusting, and surviving that we
lose track of our inner patterns.
The why behind our what. And that's where the anagram can

(00:24):
help. Today, we're exploring how the
anagram offers deep insights into our motivations, our fears,
and the unconscious patterns that shape how we move through
the world, and how all of this connects to burnout, masking,
and recovery. Whether you're brand new to the
anagram or have dabbled in it before, I invite you to stay

(00:46):
curious. This episode could be the start
of a whole new relationship withyourself.
Step out of the shadows until the power will rise.
Catch the spark inside you. Let your spirit fly.
Be on the chronic burner, Carol Jeans, you'll die.
Find your step. Be real.

(01:07):
A nice joy on the tide going forward.
Fight and roll. Leave the bird up far behind.
And this journey, hearts unfold.Hey there, beautiful humans.

(01:37):
I'm Carol Jean Whittington, Chief Well-being Officer here at
Whittington Well-being, and welcome to Beyond Chronic
Burnout, the talk show where autistic women and the
professionals who support them come together to explore
sustainable energy, deep well-being, and what it really
means to live unmasked. Let me ask you something.

(02:00):
Have you ever wondered why you keep to things a certain way
even when you thought you were past it?
Oh, yeah. That has happened a couple of
times in my world. Today, we're diving into a tool
that helped me uncover layers ofmyself I didn't even know
existed. The angiogram, and more

(02:20):
specifically, how this ancient framework can be used by
autistic women to understand ourmotivations, fears and patterns
beneath the mask. And how you as a practitioner
can use this with your clients too.
Let me take you back to when I first discovered the anagram.
I was deep in burnout, not as tired, but like system overload,

(02:44):
energy depleted, body shutting down, Burnout, a ghost Piper
Level 5, and it was desperate tofind a way back to myself.
When I started exploring the anagram, I immediately resonated
with Type 5. The investigator with a strong
wing for that combination. Deep thinking, relentless

(03:04):
research, needing to understand before taking action, craving
space and emotional depth, but not always knowing how to
express it. Sound familiar?
Reading about Type 5W4 felt likesomeone had quietly followed me
around with a journal, recordingmy hidden thought.

(03:25):
It was a little scary. It didn't give me a label, it
gave me a language, a mirror. I wasn't broken.
I just needed to better understand my inner ecosystem.
And the anagram that changed everything.
It was so funny because the bookthat I picked up the road back

(03:47):
to you, it just, it was one of those moments where when I read
the anagram type 5, it just immediately resonated.
And then as I continued to read,there were things that made me
like very uncomfortable because they were so true.
So you might be asking what is the anagram?

(04:10):
And it's spelled ENNEAGR AM but pronounced anagram.
So the anagram is a system of nine core personality types,
each driven by a unique set of motivators, fears, and desires.
But it's not about labeling. This isn't like Myers bricks.

(04:31):
It's about uncovering the unconscious patterns that drive
our actions, especially under stress.
So here's a quick rundown of thenine types.
See which one resonates most with you.
So type 1 is the reformer, ethical, responsible,

(04:54):
improvement focused. Type 2 is the helper, caring,
generous, people pleasing. Type 3 is the achiever,
ambitious, image conscious, success driven.
Now, let me just tell you each one of these types, all nine, we
all have elements of all nine types within us.

(05:17):
It's just what predominantly shows up in our patterns.
And the anneogram isn't just about like your personality, who
you are. It's who you innately were born
to be and how your environment has shaped you.
So it's a little bit of everything.
I really love the anneogram's approach.
It's very holistic. So a type 4 the individualist,

(05:41):
creative, sensitive, emotionallydeep.
Type 5, the investigator, analytical, independent,
emotionally reserved. Type 6, the loyalist,
responsible, anxious, security seeking.
Type 7 the enthusiast, spontaneous, fun loving, future

(06:03):
oriented. Type 8 is the challenger,
assertive, protective, independent, and Type 9 the
peacemaker, easygoing, agreeable, conflict avoidant.
So just remember any and all of these types.
We all have them within us at any given moment and they will

(06:28):
adjust based on maybe the circumstances we're in, the
environment, the season of life that we're in.
We may learn more towards some of these traits or
characteristics more than others.
But that one core type in the wing and we'll talk about that
in a second. Those are your most dominant
patterns and this framework really helps to identify more

(06:53):
about who you are because that'sone of the biggest questions
that that we have as late identified folks.
And for a lot of us, especially if we've even had an
identification early, it's neverfelt safe to explore.
So if you're here exploring yourself today and wanting to
peel back some mask and really get to answer that question, who

(07:16):
am I? This is where we start in the
Unveiling method. This is the very first module in
the Unveiling Methods FoundationBuilder.
And this is one of the key components that I talk about and
breakdown step by step in my newbook, Living Unmasked.
So now let's ground this in our lived experience.

(07:39):
All of these nine types, right? So autistic women are often
misread, misdiagnosed and misunderstood.
I don't know about y'all, but this is so true for me and my
experience. The anagram offers a neuro
affirming way to reconnect with ourselves, not through
behaviors, but through understanding the needs and the

(08:00):
motivations behind them. That's really powerful
information, and it can be especially helpful if you
experience Alexa thymia, which makes it difficult to identify
or articulate feelings. The aniogram isn't based on how
you feel in the moment, but on what drives you across time, so

(08:23):
it helps answer these three things in particular.
What am I always trying to avoid?
What patterns show up when I feel unsafe?
What really recharges me and why?
If you're autistic and struggling with burnout, the
anagram can help you understand how you operate on your terms.

(08:47):
Let's begin by preparing the soil.
This is our moment to pause, getgrounded, and createspace for
today's insights to take root. Let's take a moment to tune into

(09:08):
our inner world. If you're in a safe space where
you aren't operating a car or equipment, I invite you to close
your eyes if that feels comfortable.
Or simply soften your gaze if you're not in a space where you
can do that. Just listen and breathe along
with me. Take a deep breath in

(09:29):
comfortable. No, no hard work here.
Just nice full breath in and out.
Drop your shoulders a little bit, settle into your your chair
or wherever you are right now. Again, let's just take a nice
inhale and and exhale. Just relax your shoulders,

(09:57):
soften your jaw, relax your eyesjust a little bit more.
Now place your attention gently on your chest or your abdomen
and ask yourself, without needing an answer, what part of
me wants to be understood today?Don't try to fix or figure

(10:24):
anything out. Just TuneIn and listen to your
body. What part of me wants to be
understood today? You don't need an answer right

(10:49):
now if it's not quite coming to you.
You're just creating space, a little breathing room.
You're preparing the soil for you, for clarity.
Feel your body soften just a little bit more.
Release your shoulders, relax your jaw.

(11:16):
When you're ready, gently open your eyes, wiggle your toes,
your fingers. Maybe have a big stretch.
Now that we're grounded and open, let's move gently into
today's energy in action opportunity.

(11:37):
Heart first with compassionate curiosity.
Here's your invitation. This week, explore your anagram
type. In this week's Recharge
newsletter, I'm sharing my Energy Honoring Anagram

(11:59):
Assessment, a tool I've adapted and developed specifically for
autistic women to explore their anagram type through a
neuroaffirming lens that keeps energy resources in mind.
You'll also get my overview of all nine anagram types that
share insights to identify at a glance what is motivating you,

(12:23):
what fears are getting in the way of your nourishment, and
more. Tools you'll find in my newest
book, Living Unmasked, include the Anneagrams Stress Warning
Signs and Security Signpost Guide.
Anagram specific insights into how your type reacts under
stress versus when you feel safeand how that influences burnout,

(12:49):
recovery, and unmasking. All of these tools are part of
the Living Unmasked book resources.
If you have the book, you already have access, my friend.
If not, check the show notes or head to Whittington
wellbeing.com to learn more. As part of our Recharge
newsletter this week you will get those two anagram downloads.

(13:14):
This isn't about putting yourself in a box, remember.
It's about giving yourself a compass to navigate burnout,
energy and healing. And now we water and nourish.
These are your reflection prompts.

(13:35):
To deepen today's insight and support sustainable self
discovery. Let's journal.
Here are two prompts for this week.
How does my anagram type relate to my autistic traits?
Does it explain how I process transitions, relationships, or

(13:57):
sensory input? Question 2.
And these will be down in the show notes.
By the way, what insights did I gain about my core motivations
and fears? How does knowing this help me
support myself with more kindness?
Let this be gentle. You're not fixing anything,

(14:20):
you're just learning more about the incredible, layered,
beautifully woven person you already are.
There's no rush. Let your reflections unfold with
gentleness, with compassionate curiosity, because your healing
deserves time and tenderness. Feel like I need to break out

(14:42):
with the song? Just a little tenderness.
Y'all know I'm so quirky, right?Well, in this next segment route
to practice, this is our newest show segment and I'm really
excited about it. Where each week we'll take the
insights from today's episode and ground them into real world

(15:05):
tools for your work as a helpingprofessional.
Let's translate theory into meaningful neuroaffirming and
trauma sensitive care. The Enneagram can be a game
changer in your practice, especially if you support
autistic women. Here's why.

(15:28):
It helps clients explore their motivations and patterns without
needing to rely on moment to moment emotional language, which
can be inaccessible due to alexithymia.
And I have a great article out on LinkedIn and on the recharge
over at energize.whittingtonwellbeing.com
around Alexa Bimneum. It supports burnout recovery by

(15:53):
identifying how each type leaks energy and what they need to
feel safe. So the anaogram is really
helping you be very strategic inyour care of your client and
support. It gives you trauma informed
identity affirming framework to guide clients back into
alignment because ultimately burnout has occurred from being

(16:17):
out of alignment by masking heavily that integrator masking
style, especially sometimes for decades.
Here's how you can bring the anagram into your sessions with
autistic clients. You can use the ineogram to
tailor burnout interventions by type and in the unveiling

(16:38):
method. I provide you with all of these
tools as part of our Clinical Companion toolkit #2 Support
Masking Recovery through self-awareness.
This is such a beautiful place to help introduce your client to
themselves in a really beautifulway and #3 it helps client

(16:58):
clients understand their needs in relationships and in their
work and inside the living unmasked Bonus resources ioffer
Enneagram tools you can use right away with clients.
Here are your sessions with sensory and energy mapping.
So using tools like my Energy Body Appraisal or Sensory

(17:21):
Profile Blueprint alongside the anagram to notice how each type
responds to sensory input or depletion.
Teach your clients their stress and security signposts.
Each type shows signs of stress and safety in very distinct
ways, and I've put a whole list of these together in the

(17:41):
unveiling method. Helping clients name these signs
builds self trust and supports earlier burnout prevention.
You can access our Enneagram warning signs and security
signposts as part of the resources included with the book
Living Unmasked. That's your practice route for

(18:03):
today. Take what resonates adapted for
your style, and keep supporting your clients with care that's
grounded, compassionate, and real, while also caring for
yourself. Compassion fatigue is very, very
prominent right now, and your well-being matters just as much

(18:25):
as your clients. Understanding your inner world
isn't selfish, It's essential. Whether you're just starting or
rediscovering yourself post burnout, the anagram can give
you the compassionate clarity you've been searching for.
This week's affirmation to take with you.

(18:48):
I am gaining A deeper understanding of my inner world.
That's such a beautiful place togive ourselves permission to
Createspace for us to begin discovering.
And I think you're going to haveso much fun this week exploring
your Aneagram type. This weekend on social

(19:11):
Saturdays, I'm joined by Alexia Hetzel as we talk all things
ADHD, transitions, time, energy,and how to support your
beautifully wired brain. If you're not subscribed to the
Recharge newsletter yet, now is the time.
All the resources we discussed are LinkedIn the show notes

(19:33):
below, and you can also find those at Whittington
wellbeing.com. Sign up for the newsletter there
and get all the recharge goodness, especially those
things that we send out in our newsletter every week so you
don't miss them. Until next time, be kind to your
system and keep unmasking with care.

(19:57):
I'm so excited to be on this journey and supporting you along
the way my friend. Take care and I'll see you on
social Saturdays with my guest, Alexia Hetzel.
It's been quite all right. Let's turn the tide.
Top shelf guests dropping wisdombombs.

(20:18):
Join us next week where the energy's strong.
Beyond crying burnout, We're breaking free.
Podcast pumping full of energy, tips and tricks to boost your
fight. Fast pace and.
Fun. You'll feel alive.
Energy mastery. Come along for the ride behind

(20:41):
Beyond Burnout. We're on the rise.
Join us as we form a top shelf. There's nothing to energy
throughout us.