Love, Loss and Learning : Reflections on the World Events

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Some moments change us forever. Standing beneath the Twin Towers as a college student in 1999, I couldn't have imagined how those buildings would come to symbolize both our national trauma and our capacity for unity just two years later. 

The anniversary of 9/11 prompted me to record these unplanned reflections about what we've gained and lost since that day when Americans briefly set aside their differences to grieve together. Working in Texas politics taught me that survival depends on finding common ground with those who think differently. You learn quickly that disagreement doesn't have to mean division—that you can build something meaningful together even when you don't see eye-to-eye on everything.

But something has shifted in our society. Where did we lose the ability to disagree peacefully? When did differences become dangerous? Growing up in small-town Texas where kids kept guns in their trucks at school without incident feels worlds away from today's landscape of political violence and school shootings. Fear has replaced trust. Labels have replaced humanity. And I wonder how we find our way back.

I don't have all the answers, but I believe the path forward requires more courage, more honest conversations, and more willingness to see each other as people first—not as the letter behind a name or the title on a business card. True understanding comes not from books but from lived experiences that teach us humanity. Even through my hardest times, including homelessness, love has sustained me. And love—for family, friends, and even those who challenge us—might be what saves us yet.

Join me in this moment of reflection as we remember not just what we lost on 9/11, but what we briefly found: our shared humanity.

https://www.jamapantel.com

Episode Transcript

Jama Pantel (00:00):
Hey y'all, it's Jama.
Today's episode is going to bedifferent and I wasn't even
planning on recording today, butwith the anniversary of 9-11
and everything happening in theworld right now, I felt called
to do this and share some of myreflections.
I couldn't get through mymorning walk or lift without

(00:21):
stopping to write down mythoughts, so here they are.
I tend to put pen to paper whenstuff like this happens, but I
don't always share.
I honestly started this podcastto share more than short viral
social media clips because it'sso hard to convey anything in

(00:48):
five-second viral clips.
I still remember going to acollege party in 1999 in New
York City in what was called theTwin Towers District.
I'd just arrived at the party,got out of the cab and looked up
in awe at two of the tallestbuildings I have ever seen in my
life and of course, I was atourist in that moment looking
up.
I'm from flat farmland in SouthTexas and I had never seen

(01:09):
anything like that in my lifeand I have since traveled the
world and seen a lot, but thatone moment will stick out in my
mind forever.
Two years later, I was workingfor the Texas Senate.
That morning I planned on goingin late because I was helping
some friends pack and move.
We didn't have the TV on, wewere just all busy working.
That morning the movers arrivedon time and came in and told us

(01:34):
to turn on the TV.
About 10 of us total sat there,movers included, in silence,
together, watching the worldchange in real time, and I will
never, ever forget how I felt atthat time.
That day is burned into mymemory and over the years I've
thought a lot about what itmeans for how we live and work

(01:55):
with one another.
I make a living in politics inTexas, analyzing and lobbying
policy.
And here's the truth If youwant to survive in that world,
you need to learn how to talk topeople who think differently
than you, learn how to listen,learn how to find common ground.
You realize you don't have toagree on everything, but you can

(02:16):
always still find something,however small, to build upon
together.
And I wonder sometimes whathappened to that.
The truth is, some days peoplelove what I brought to the table
and other days they hated it.
And many times they had thosesame feelings in the same
meeting, where they loved andhated what I had to say, and

(02:37):
that is just how it was.
And here's where it gets heavy,because lately I've been asking
myself how did we get herewhere we are now?
In the recent past we've seenpolitical killings, both D's and
R's alike.
We've seen school shootingsover and over again.
We've been vilified, victimizedand everything else, and I

(02:59):
can't help but compare that tomy own upbreaking.
I grew up in a really smalltown in Texas where kids kept
guns in their trucks in schools.
It wasn't scary, it wasn'tsomething we thought about, it
was just part of our day-to-daylives.
Something has shifted.
Somewhere along the way fearreplaced trust, division
replaced common ground andlabels replaced humanity.

(03:22):
And let me be clear.
I am not perfect.
I am a sinner.
I stumble and I get it wrongmore often than I care to admit,
but I try my best to listen andunderstand all sides in
different situations I face.
When did we start viewingdifferences as evil?
When did we start thinkingsomeone is dangerous simply
because we don't agree with them?
How do we relearn to live indisagreement but still in peace?

(03:48):
I don't have answers to any ofthese questions and I know what
I'm saying right now, somepeople might hear it and think
that I'm wrong, but does thatmean I deserve to be attacked
for it?
Does that mean I deserve to behurt over it?
I've said it before and I'llsay it again: Learn to have
conversations with people whoseopinions differ from your own.
Learn to talk to the human, notthe letter behind the name or

(04:11):
the title on the business card.
And I'm not talking about peoplewho are different growing up
than you, who still went to thesame school as you did.
I'm talking about people whodon't have schooling, who don't
have what you have.
For me, it's never matteredwhere you went to school, or
even that you did go to school.
What matters is whether you'velived in the real world.

(04:31):
What matters is whether you'vewalked through different
experiences and learned fromthem.
That's where empathy comes in.
That's where understandinggrows.
Book knowledge can give youfacts, but lived experiences
teaches you humanity.
And as I think about all of this, I mourn the loss of all life.

(04:51):
Every single one matters.
I also love deeply and I'mthankful for my family and
friends, both those who thinklike me and those who don't, and
those who challenge me.
Even when I was homeless, I wasgrateful to have had love in my
life.
That love sustained me then andit will sustain me now.
I will keep loving my peopleand my family tightly.

(05:11):
I will keep cherishing the timeI have with them because, at
the end of the day, that's whatmatters most.
On September 11, 2001, for amoment, we were all united.
We were different people indifferent places, with different
lives, different beliefs, butwe were all human together.
I still believe we can be thisagain, but it's going to take

(05:33):
more conversations, more courage, more willingness to admit we
are imperfect and more of uschoosing to see each other as
people first.
Thanks for coming to my TEDTalk, but honestly, thank you
for listening to my reflectionsand my experience.
I'll be back to my regularlyscheduled episodes soon, but
today I just wanted to sit herewith you in this moment and

(05:56):
reflect.
Thanks, y'all.