Ep. 51 - Last DbD Podcast Standing? Also, Pocket Ravioli! - Camping Them Softly: A Dead by Daylight Podcast

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
crying over orella rose being trans can go eat cold
spaghetti in a dark alley withno sauce.
Yes, capisce, this is dead bydaylight, not dead by
disrespecting someone'sexistence.

Speaker 3 (00:44):
Oh, hey, guys, it is episode 51.
That is exciting.
That's going to put us inprobably season two.
Is this season two, episode one?
Did we make it a full season?
Do we say 50 is a season?
I don't even know what the fuckam I even doing here.

(01:06):
You know what?
Also, also, also, shut the fuckup.
This is too important, guys.
I'm the toxic teacher.
You can find me on all thosesocials toxicteacherttv, find me
on YouTube and all thatbullshit.
Okay, twitch, everything.
But I got to tell you this Ithink, I think and I was doing
some research on this I might bethe only Dead by Daylight

(01:31):
podcast left.
I can't prove it.
I can't prove it, but I waschecking Spotify.
I didn't see the other ones, mycompetitors.
I didn't see that they hadanything going on recently which
might put me in that rare theleague of one.
And I'm actually going to searchdead by daylight podcast.

(01:52):
I could be totally fuckingwrong and I'll just find out
right here in front of everybody.
So let me go.
I'm going to podcast here.
Where are they?
Where are they fucking podcastsright here?
How do I find out what the mostrecent ones are here?
I don't even know.
Let me see, this one, this wasa big one, november 8th, 2024.
So that's been months and thatwas one of the bigger ones.

(02:14):
How do I even go back?
I can't even go back on here.
What?
How the fuck do I go back?
It doesn't even let me hang on.
Dead by daylight podcast.
Now see, this just might be athing like a okay, this one
right here, this one I know, wasbig, oh, march 3rd.
Okay, so that they do like onea month.
So they're still in it.

(02:35):
They're still in it, but that'sthem and me.
So that's it.
We got two fuckers left, twodead by daylight podcasts and
we're going to somehow get morelisteners than them.
Maybe if they quit, then we'llhave more.
Yes, bitch, we're going to getin it.

(02:56):
Anyway, guys, thank you forcoming by Camping them Softly.
The worst of the two Dead byDaylight podcasts that are out
there, the most unhinged, themost chaotic, and that's what
people come for.
They come for the chaos, theycome for the madness, they come
for the sheer insanity of apodcast that talks about Dead by

(03:16):
Daylight for 10 minutes andthen bullshit for 50.
You know, that was the stingerof last week's episode, episode
50 or big five.
Oh, now we're on the big fiveone and I am in it.
We have a shit load to talkabout, so I gave myself extra
time and we may even have topump this into two or three
episodes we may have.

(03:37):
This is a grand, epic fuckingthing.
I don't even know.
There's just there is a lot totalk about this week, so I've
got to get right into it.
I'm trying to think if I haveany personal Dead by Daylight
related news and I don't think Ido and what's weird is I'm
finding coworkers who are alsoDead by Daylight players, so

(04:00):
I've got something to talk tothem about.
But most of them sound kind oflike they're survivor mains or
survivor main friendly orsurvivor main like you know,
adjacent.
Which do you still?
Are you still able to work withthem properly if they're
survivor mains, like if we'recollaborating on a project, do I
?
Do I?
Is their credibility shotbecause they have such bad taste

(04:24):
in who they play in an onlinegame?
I don't know.
I mean, that's up for you guysto decide.
What in the hell is this crap?
You know probably where I stand.
I'm going to try to work withthem anyway.
I'll work with anybody, but itkind of it takes you down a
level.
That's like, if you're French,you know it takes you down a

(04:47):
level that's like, if you'reFrench, you know it.
Just it's not quite the.
The amount of closeness wecould potentially have is is not
quite there.
Anyway, that that's enoughabout that.
So that that was one thing thathappened this week, dead by
daylight, related for me, um,but there's so much that we have
to go straight into you knowwhat?
You know you know this song.

(05:13):
Right, we got to go straightinto the news.
It is the news.

Speaker 2 (05:19):
Yes.

Speaker 3 (05:23):
Yeah, they're in pain this week.
They do all look the same.
We know that they're alwayscomplaining.

Speaker 2 (05:31):
Yeah, yes, we yes.

Speaker 3 (05:38):
It's a.
I mean there we go.
It's the yeah, there we go.
Okay, I'll turn that shit off,hey.
By the way, guys, I also wantto thank you.
I know I'm off the chain today,but that's because I'm so
excited.
We had the biggest single dayof downloads in the history of

(06:01):
the fucking podcast Give me ahell yeah.
I think we deserve a hell yeahfor that, don't we Don't?
We deserve a hell yeah, becauseI'll do another.
I'll do a fucking another.
No, not that one.
How do we have two Stone Coldsounds playing at the same time?
Satan, what do you think aboutit?
What do you think about it?

(06:23):
I think Satan's happy.
I need to talk to Satan.
We need a voice of Satan.
So I need to work on that.
We're going to have to figurethat out.
I don't know how that's goingto happen, but we'll figure out
a way.
Anywho, let's go into the toxicnews this week.
So we've got a few things goingon.
Some of them are controversial.

(06:44):
We're going to dive headfirstinto the controversy.
We are going to dive headfirst.
We've got a couple of patchesto talk about, and you already
know who I've asked about thesepatches.
I already asked him and I gotsome fucking insane answers back
, and so we're going to gothrough that.
So the first one.
The first one is the 8.6.2patch.

(07:08):
So this is not this is separatefrom the 8.7, the PTB patch
that has come out.
This is a live like kind of fixthat just happened, and so
we'll go over this in.
Most of it is centered aroundKaneki and nerfing him.
We knew he was going to benerfed.

(07:28):
Everybody fucking knew Kanekiwas not going to stay the way he
was.
It was just untenable.
We've talked about it.
We talked about it at length.
You've seen it everywhere.
This shit has gotten thoroughlyworn out.
So let's go through some of theshit Now.
His tentacle range is down.

(07:49):
His enrage mode time is down.
His bonus is down.
His reticle stickiness thatauto-aim is down.
His aiming on survivors for agrab attack is down.
His damage, like it says reducegrab attack's damage, minimum
distance by negative 30%.
I don't even know what the fuckthat means.

(08:11):
It says.
After breaking a pallet, thepower goes into a forced cool
down.
His fresh coffee at the raritywas increased.
Everything about this killerhas been nerfed, and so we need
to know what the effect of thatis.
That's something else I got toput on my Google Keep.

(08:31):
Remember how I had that GoogleKeep page where I had a couple
of things I was supposed to betracking and I don't even
fucking think I ever did.
What was this?
8.6 Xeno changes Does it affecthis stats?
Watch Blight as well.
Those were my things from lasttime, so now I'm going to have
to say hang on, you have to.
I have to be explicit.

(08:52):
Like I don't know about youguys, but I noticed like to get
more organized because of theADHD.
Like I don't remember thingsfrom one day to the next.
My brain is a nightmare on theinside.
From one day to the next, mybrain is a nightmare on the
inside, which I can talk abouthere in a minute.
But I have to write downexactly what I'm thinking, or
else I'm going to forget aboutwhat I'm thinking the next day.

(09:13):
So I'm going to put 8.6.2Konecki nerves.
We're going to check nightlightin.
Fucking what do we say?
We're gonna say two weeks,maybe in two weeks, for results.
Okay, to see what happens tokineki, okay, so we'll do that,

(09:36):
I'll check on that.
The 8.6 xeno change, all thatstuff we'll check on that.
Maybe, if I fucking remember,because I remember Zeno got I
think he got some nerfs and thenBlight.
They tried to change a littlebit too.
I don't know if it's changedanything, but that is outside of
the scope of this episode.
Okay, okay, everybody.

(09:57):
Yes, yes, outside of the scope,okay.
So let's go into this 8.6.2.
We already talked about what thechanges are going to be, but we
need to get our expert thoughtsfrom somebody you know as Nikki

(10:19):
AI Dente, the noodle arms, thevice Don of fucking sabam, the
society of what was it?
Authentic basement, and mori,everybody's favorite mafioso,
dead by daylight player, who'sbeen around the world.
He has, uh what?

(10:41):
Gotten in fistfights inmultiple cities.
He has stolen arcade machines.
He has caused swimming pools tofloat above ground 12 feet in
the air.
He has been banned frommultiple places.
I need a longer song for him.
I need a longer, I needsomething longer there, because
that wasn't even long enough formy fucking introduction.

(11:03):
Okay, anyway, nikki, are youhere?
Can you tell me, nikki, nikki,your thoughts, your thoughts on
8.6.0?
We've, we've got to talk aboutit, so let's, why don't we just
talk about?
it reduced tentacle range from60 meters to hang on Nikki, hang

(11:25):
on Nikki, nikki, nikki, nikki.
You went straight into it.
So tell us about these nerfsand tell us what you think about
them.
So we've got that first nerfabout the tentacle range.
Okay, so go from here.
Go from here for me.

Speaker 1 (11:40):
The ghoul nerfs reduce tentacle range from 60
meters to 14 meters.

Speaker 3 (11:44):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (11:44):
Hey yo, why not just glue a toothpick to his arm and
call it a day Whoa?
He already got wet spaghettilimbs and now they made him al
dente in the worst way, did they?
Soft and useless?
Reduced enrage mode time from45 seconds to 40 seconds.
Jesus Wow, five seconds shavedoff, like my cousin Enzo's

(12:05):
parole hearing, but he onlyalmost hit someone.
Exactly what this feels like.

Speaker 3 (12:10):
What the fuck is he talking?

Speaker 1 (12:11):
about Grab attack reticle nerfed by 94%.

Speaker 3 (12:13):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (12:14):
What is this?

Speaker 3 (12:15):
Okay, so the grab attack was nerfed, that reticle
was nerfed by 94%.
That's huge, that is enormous.

Speaker 1 (12:23):
This a joke.

Speaker 3 (12:25):
No, it's not.

Speaker 1 (12:26):
That ain't a nerf.
What is it?
That's a murder.
Whoa that ain't balancing, it'ssabotage.

Speaker 3 (12:34):
Yes, we're going to see how these numbers work out.
We're going to see.
I know people are playing on8.7 right now.
I know.
Well, this is live right now,now.
So I haven't really read aboutit because I'm ignorant, but I'm
gonna assume people are pissed.
I think killer mains probablynot happy about this, survivor
mains probably over the moon, orthey're still fucking

(12:56):
complaining that it's still toomuch.
Well, we'll find out.
I'm gonna look at that later.
Nikki, keep going.

Speaker 1 (13:01):
It's a murder, it's sabotage you trying to tell me
this man with a laser-guidedtentacle now got the aim of a
hungover Fettuccine 5 member Idon't know who the Fettuccine 5
is he made this shit up.

Speaker 3 (13:12):
That's some kind of a gang of something in one of his
lore documents that he haswritten for me.
That's 50 fucking pages longthat I haven't gone through.
Remember we had three of hisfamily members tried to upload
themselves into cyberspace andwe've only talked about one.
There's two somewhere in a deepdocument, somewhere I don't
even know.
Okay, anyway, the Fettuccine 5.

(13:34):
He can't aim anymore.

Speaker 1 (13:36):
Fresh coffee is now very rare.

Speaker 3 (13:39):
That was the add-on.

Speaker 1 (13:41):
Let me get this straight.

Speaker 3 (13:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (13:42):
Coffee just became rare in Tokyokyo.
Gulur, yeah it.
Anti-caffeination tech it is,which is basically anti-italian
tech by proxy.
Okay yeah, umbrella got demotedto wait hinami's umbrella I
don't even know what the fuckthat is my nana used to use an
umbrella she To hitdisrespectful kids.

Speaker 3 (14:07):
Okay, Now.

Speaker 1 (14:07):
BHVR is disrespecting her memory.

Speaker 3 (14:09):
Whoa, how dare they?

Speaker 1 (14:10):
I'll send you all to meet her, if this continues.

Speaker 3 (14:12):
Okay, so you don't disrespect Nikki's fucking
grandmother.

Speaker 1 (14:18):
Taiyaki nerfed to five seconds.

Speaker 3 (14:19):
I don't know what that is, what the hell is he
even enraged about now?

Speaker 1 (14:22):
He's just mildly miffed now.

Speaker 3 (14:25):
Shaggy pert I perturb pastry demon okay, so kenicky
doesn't get mad anymore, he justgets a little annoyed yeah,
maury's mask got a 40 metersurvivor distance requirement
great okay, so now we gotta domath just to run a mask.

Speaker 1 (14:40):
What is this?
A british school?

Speaker 3 (14:42):
exam.

Speaker 1 (14:44):
Earl Gray wrote this patch, didn't he?

Speaker 3 (14:47):
He could very well have done it.
By the way, you guys seem to behappy about Earl Gray on the
show last week.
I was not for one, obviously,nikki was not, but we may have
to get them on again.
Okay, so, Nikki, now we got totalk.
I think we've got some.
We've got some perk, or we haveone perk change None or none
are free.

(15:07):
I don't even remember.
None are free.
Perk DBD I have to look intothat.
I don't even know.
I think that's a Konecki perkwhich I haven't kept up with.
It says right here whenever youhook a survivor for the first
time none are free gains a tokenup to a maximum of four.
Once all the generators arecompleted, none are free.
Calls upon the entity totrigger the following effect

(15:31):
Okay, so once they complete thegens, blocks all windows and
upright pallets for a stackable12, 14, 16 seconds up to a max
of 48, 50, 64 seconds.
You can block all windows andpallets for over a minute.
So that's, that's pretty big.
I think I like it.

(15:51):
I don't.
I don't know why that's such aproblem, but it says right here
none are free.
God, it's for everyone clause.
What For everyone clause?
What for everyone clause?

(16:13):
Um, hang on, yeeted.
What the fuck is he talkingabout?
Got it yeeted, what I?
I don't know.
I'm trying to find the fuckinghang on.
Hang on what?
What are the notes?
Where is my page showing thefucking notes to this thing?
Here we go.
None are free.
When you hook a survivor, gainone token.
When all generators arecompleted, remove the blocked

(16:34):
for everyone.
Oh so, was it saying foreveryone?
No, it's the same.
Then it's the fucking same.
This week on camping themsoftly, it's the fucking same.
This week on Camping themSoftly, it's the fucking same,
because if you say they're allblocked, that's the same as
saying they're all blocked foreveryone.
So apparently Nikki's mad aboutthat, or just doesn't even

(16:55):
fucking know what's going on.
Okay, nikki.

Speaker 1 (16:59):
New perk changes.
None are free.
God is for everyone clause,yeet it.
Oh wow, just gut the perkentirely.

Speaker 3 (17:06):
No, it's the same.

Speaker 1 (17:07):
I guess BHVR heard people were having fun and said
nah.

Speaker 3 (17:10):
Well, that's true.

Speaker 1 (17:11):
This perk went from death grip on the map to mild
inconvenience.

Speaker 3 (17:15):
I think it's the same .
I think it's the same.

Speaker 1 (17:17):
Might as well.
Rename it to none are useful.

Speaker 3 (17:19):
Well, it seemed useful.
Bug fix, bug.
Oh, he's talking about bugfixes.
I don't even.
I don't even care about that.
Um, we're gonna, we're gonnatalk about.
Let me fast forward to a littlebit to connect, uh, to like the
, the, uh, what's it?
What do you call the end of athing?
The conclusion, that's what wecall it here.

Speaker 1 (17:38):
On camping them softly all right, the terrier
tray in the middle of a familyfuneral.

Speaker 2 (17:44):
What is he On a?

Speaker 1 (17:45):
claw foot tub.
What is what?
X, T, H, I, S, S, H.
What is he doing?
And don't make me call MamaMarinara.
You know what happened to Luckylast time.

Speaker 3 (17:57):
I don't even know what's going on.
He is not happy about the patch, but that's 8.6.2.
They killed Kaneki.
They about the patch, butthat's 8.6.2.
They killed Kaneki.
They murdered my boy.
He is gone.
He is dead.
Maybe we'll find out in twoweeks.
Whenever I check the fucking,whenever I check the fucking
stats on that.
So that is that.
Now.
Next thing we got to talk aboutis in the.

(18:20):
Should I do this again?
Should I?
Yeah, we're going to the nextsegment.
We need a next segment.
Yeah, ooh, oh, yeah, we gotthat breakdown part right there.
Yes, we got to go into 8.7 now.
Yeah, yeah, I don't know, Ican't stop once I start it.

(18:52):
It stings, okay, anyway, noneof you know what movie that's
from, but whatever.
So, 8.7.0,.
We just got an announcement.
Do you remember that survivorwe were talking about last time
with the radio and we listenedto her and all that shit were
talking about last time with theradio and we listened to her
and all that shit.
She has now been announced, forbetter or worse.
Her name is O'Reilly O'Reilly,o'reilly, o'reilly Auto Parts.

(19:16):
I can't remember what'sO'Reilly.
How do you pronounce the fucking, the fucking?
How do you pronounce the nameOrelia?
Is it Orelia, orelia, orelia,orelia.
Here we go.
Orelia, orelia.
It could be pronounced Oreliaor Orelia.

(19:36):
It is derived from the variantOrelia, oh my God, which is
believed to mean golden.
It can also have theannouncement uh, no, have the
meaning, easy for me to say.
It can also have the meaningannouncement from the gods, or
oracle, uh, announcement fromthe gods.

(19:58):
I don't know, I don't.
What am I even fucking doinghere?
Like, why am I even here?
Why am I the second?
Like you know, out of twopodcasts, I am the worst Dead by
Daylight podcast.
I think we've all figured outwhy.
So anyway, hang on shut thefuck up Sound.
Okay, there we go.
So, by the way, guys, thissurvivor has caused quite a

(20:22):
controversy, and the reasonbeing that this survivor is
transgender.
And the question becomes whyare fucking people pissed off?
And here's why and we're goingback on this fucking tangent we
went on a while back I think wedid this on, like David King or
somebody else came out as gayand people just lose their shit.

(20:45):
It's the same fucking peoplethat lose their shit Anytime
there is a black person thatstars in a movie, anytime
there's a woman, anytime there'sa gay dude, anytime there's
anything different that'shappening.
That didn't happen a fuckinghundred years ago.
If there's somebody who doesn'tfucking smoke in a movie, if

(21:06):
there's somebody who smokesmarijuana.
If there's somebody who wearsclothes that are halfway modern,
if there's a woman that wearsshorts.
If there's a woman that wears at-shirt.
If there's a woman who kisses awoman, if there's a woman who
kisses anyone on screen.
Guys, back in my day, my dadcouldn't take it that a man and
a woman would sleep in the samebed on fucking tv, because

(21:28):
that's not the way they did iton fucking Archie Bunker, where
they had fucking separate bedsyou're not done with that.

Speaker 2 (21:35):
We got two words for you.

Speaker 3 (21:38):
It's fucking stupid and guys this dead by daylight.
Community, and even outside ofthe community, cannot handle the
fact that people are differentand that now, in 2025, people
can be a little bit morecomfortable being different and
can talk about being differentand can say, hey, guess what I'm

(22:02):
trans.
Or hey, guess what I'm gay.
Or hey, guess what I'm gay.
Or hey, guess what I'm a womanthat wears fucking short, like
what the fuck is wrong with youpeople?
I just don't fucking get it.

Speaker 2 (22:13):
Say what you want, because I really don't give a
damn.

Speaker 3 (22:16):
It makes absolutely no fucking sense.
And here's why it makes nosense.
Okay, people are freaking outabout this.
Aurelia O'Reilly, auto Partswoman.
Is it male to female?
See, I don't know because I'mignorant.
Okay, so let me see, aurelia, Iwould assume it's.
You know, it's kind of a maleto female thing and I apologize

(22:40):
If I have trans listeners and Isound like a fucking idiot,
that's because I am a fuckingidiot.
Okay, so there's no, there's no,I don't.
There we go.
There we go Because I am anidiot and I don't know as much
as I should about the wholething.
Like I, I'm ignorant and I canadmit that I'm ignorant, but

(23:02):
that's unlike the people whocan't handle it and who will say
no, it's got to be, the world'sgot to be the way I want it to
fucking be, and it's fuckingdumb.
Hang on, let me just ask chatGPT.
That's what we're doing thesedays, right?
We're just asking chat GPT,everything.
Is a Rella Rose, a male orfemale?

(23:25):
Okay, hang on.
This is about does Arella Roseidentify as a male or female in
DBD?
That's the better question here.
And I'm going to have toresearch this because, whatever
chat GPT says, who the fuck evenknows A transgender woman.
In the game's first originaltrans survivor character, she is

(23:48):
portrayed as a compassionateparamedic with a backstory
centered around healing andresilience.
She is voiced by Angelica Ross,a transgender actress and an
advocate known for her roles inPose and American Horror Story.
So, woman, okay, there we go.
So I've got that.
That's what I needed rightthere.
Okay, so this woman istransgender.

(24:10):
People are fucking freaking outabout it.
But here's why this is sofucking stupid is that we had a
transgender character in Dead byDaylight already and nobody
fucking freaked out about it,and that was the Brazilian dude
from Rainbow Six.
What was his name?
Turbanao or whatever.
I don't even know how topronounce.

(24:33):
What was it Turbanao name?
How do you even pronounce thatfucking name?
It's not Turbanao.
Okay, seriously, I don't evenknow.
I'm going to call him Turbinal.
Turbinal is a transgender, Ithink, man, and people didn't
freak out at all.
There was no talk about this.
Now, there was probably a bunchof fucking talk about it in the

(24:56):
Rainbow Six shit, but nobody inDead by Daylight got mad.
That's why they're sayingArella Rose is the first
transgender original character,because there was already one
before.
So why were you not fuckingfreaking out about that, this
selective fucking outrage.
These are the same people thatsaid I'm not going to play this
game anymore because DavidKing's fucking gay.

(25:17):
And why do you push your agendaby having a fucking gay?
It's so stupid and it has noplace in modern society.
It has no place in dead bydaylight, it has no place on
this fucking podcast.
And if you've got a problemwith the Rella Rose, if you've
got a problem with turban out,if you've got a problem with
David King, you get the fuck off.

(25:38):
You can uninstall Spotify, gowhatever, whatever it is you do.
I don't know what you guys do.
Probably same thing my dad didJust sit around and fucking
watch conservative news andcomplain and just waste away.
That's that, okay.
So I am done with that.
And guess who?
Guess who.
I asked about this whole thing,for better or worse, and I know

(26:05):
you're going to say, oh no, what?
What is happening here?
Why?
Why would you ask a certainperson, okay, this is not good,
hang on, I got to, I got to pullit.
I don't even know where Ifucking did it.
Nick, where are you?
Where are you?
Okay?
So he's, oh, he's in classicwise guy mode.

(26:26):
Oh no, so there are some otherpatch notes and 8.7 that got
announced.
They're taking out Oni.
Remember they were going tonerf Oni's like spin move to
where he couldn't spin 90degrees.
They've since undone that,thank God.
So yeah, anyway, let's, uh,let's get nikki going here.

(26:47):
This is just fucking I'm I'mgetting exhausted.
I wore myself out with thatbullshit there.
So, nikki, go say somethingsmart for once.

Speaker 1 (26:56):
He is in why yo I read the patch notes?
I saw the survivor.
I heard the whining, yeah andlet me tell you something loud
and fucking clear oh, jesusanybody crying over orella rose
being trans can go eat coldspaghetti in a dark alley with
no sauce.
Yes, capisce, this is dead bydaylight, not dead by
disrespecting someone'sexistence he's fucking right.

Speaker 3 (27:18):
That was yes, go eat cold spaghetti in a dark alley
with no sauce.
That's a weird way of saying it, but it's completely true.

Speaker 1 (27:27):
Okay, Nikki keep going here.
What do I think of her?
Yeah, orella Rose.

Speaker 3 (27:31):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (27:32):
She's got style.

Speaker 3 (27:32):
She's got flair.

Speaker 1 (27:34):
And, more importantly , she ain't no Claudette Maine
using self-care in a corner for12 minutes.
Well, I'll take that shealready puts her leagues above
90 of the tea time terror squadI agree they.

Speaker 3 (27:45):
Yes.
The british dbd group.
That is completely fictionaland completely generated by one
ai.
About other ais now her perks.

Speaker 1 (27:56):
Let's talk turkey.
Yeah, do no harm yeah, what is?
That faster, based on howcooked your teammate is okay,
that's.
That's what I've been sayingfor years.

Speaker 3 (28:03):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (28:04):
If they're on death hook, slap some marinara on them
and get them moving.
Okay.
Also, great skill checks givein progress.
Finally, a fucking reward fornot being a mouth breather.

Speaker 3 (28:16):
Okay that's fine.
You know what?
That's fine.
If we're going to do somethingwith great skill checks.
You know what?
I'm feeling generous tosurvivor mains, a little bit to
the survivor mains who arerational human beings.
There's like four of you outthere and you know who you are.
A lot of you think you are them, but you're not.
But there are the ones.

(28:36):
You four people.
I know you're all listenersbecause you are rational human
beings.
But getting a reward forgetting great skill checks Cool.
That would be good, paired withsomething like fucking stakeout
.
You get those, the great skillchecks build up, okay, cool.
Yeah, you're going to healbetter, all right, what?
What's the next one?

Speaker 1 (28:57):
Duty of care yeah, protection hit gives the team a
25% haste boost.

Speaker 3 (29:02):
Wait, it gives a whole team 25%.
No, there's a duty of care.
Hang on.
Duty of care perk.
Arella Rose.
That cannot be fucking right.
If that's right, I'm going tohave a fucking problem with that
Hang on.
Where is it?
I'm Googling and I'm not seeingany.
Why do I even Google?

(29:23):
Why do't people even fuckingGoogle anymore?
Just ask the.
Here we go when you take aprotection hit while healthy,
all other survivors within 16meters Okay, that's it, 16
meters gained 25% haste for 10,12, 15 seconds.
Now that's a lot.
That, to me, is quite a bit.

(29:44):
I'm have to shit on that.
Guys.
I gave you the other perk, butI'm not gonna give you this one
because to me that's a littletoo powerful.
You combine that with likemetal of man.
I think it is where, if youtake three protection hits you
get.
You get a free hit I.
I think that 15 seconds.
It's obviously going to be ananti-tunnel perk, right?

(30:05):
Because if I'm unhookingsomebody and I'm healthy and I
get hit, then that person who'sgetting off the hook is going to
have haste.
Anyone else around is going tohave haste.
I don't think this is cool.
I am not on board with this, soyou can mark me down as not
being on fucking board.
I think that perk's going to bewildly popular among Swifts.

(30:27):
I don't know that it's going tobe as popular in solo queue,
however, because it is analtruistic perk and those tend
to not be quite as popular.
So I'm going to say no, nikki,keep going about this duty of
care.

Speaker 1 (30:42):
In other words, you throw yourself in front of a
disrespectful chainsaw and thecrew books it out of there, like
they just heard Mama Marinara'svoice.

Speaker 3 (30:49):
Because she's about to hit you with a fucking
umbrella, like he said earlier.

Speaker 1 (30:53):
This perk is pure Sicilian loyalty energy
trademark.
I'm going to call it theGabagool Gambit.

Speaker 3 (30:59):
The Gabagool Gambit.
Okay, he seems oddly okay withthat.
I don't know why.
I just pushed that button.
Okay, anyway, Nikki, keep going.

Speaker 1 (31:09):
Rapid response.

Speaker 3 (31:10):
Yeah, that's her other one.
Hang on, I've got to read itbecause if I Apparently I didn't
read the other one, I had nofucking idea what was going on.
So let me read this one.
When you do a fast locker exit,you suffer from exhausted for
30 seconds Okay, whatever exit,you suffer from exhausted for 30
seconds, okay, whatever.
When you gain exhausted, you seethe killer's aura for one, one

(31:33):
and a half, two seconds when yougain exhausted.
So is that any time you gainexhausted, no matter what it's
from, you're going to see theiraura, because then you would be
able to.
But then again you would bepairing two exhaustion perks,
like if you wanted to pair itwith sprint burst and you would
see the killer's aura.

(31:53):
If you want to pair it with alife or something, balance
landing or something like that,you would see the killer's aura,
but then you have twoexhaustion perks.
Wouldn't even matter unless,like, you would just keep that
in your back pocket for the aurareading.
I don't know about that kind ofgoofy anyway, nikki go a locker

(32:13):
, get exhausted, but see thekiller's aura.

Speaker 1 (32:16):
Let me get this straight you're rewarded for
popping out of a locker like aspicy meatball.
Okay, yeah, all right.
That's a little weird, is it?

Speaker 3 (32:30):
but if it helps spot ghostface doing business, I'll
allow it so oh, he's saying, ifyou could see me camping, if you
could see me mooring, that'sfine.
I kind of like that as forkiller changes yeah, what about
them?

Speaker 1 (32:43):
doctors unhooked shock spam nerf.

Speaker 3 (32:45):
Okay, so the doctor has a cool down now on that
shocking whenever you know howthey took away the thing.
Where you could, they weregoing to stop the, the, the, um,
what's the word?
I'm looking for the fuckingwhere you can act like you're
pulling them off the hook overand over again.
I forget the fucking abuse orfucking whatever, I can't even
think of the word.

(33:05):
But he's getting a nerve or acool down whenever he shocks
somebody and they're going forthe unhook.

Speaker 1 (33:12):
About damn time.
I've seen this guy's that morethan my cousin Vinny trying to
rewire the espresso machine.

Speaker 3 (33:19):
Cousin Vinny, is that from the movie Oni?
Okay, here's Oni's turn.

Speaker 1 (33:24):
Radius no more turn rate.
Restriction on Demon Strike.

Speaker 3 (33:27):
Yes, oh shit, they need that.

Speaker 1 (33:28):
Somebody's about to get whacked faster than a snitch
in a bakery.
Right how Master Snug's vaultspeed got adjusted and they
boosted the BP game, the BP game.

Speaker 3 (33:40):
Remember we talked about that last time, like what
the fuck.

Speaker 1 (33:46):
Day Day.
I was starting to think themutt was using bhvr's private
service perks okay, perk, wisewise.
We got haystack and gone, whichmeans no more made for this,
plus hope, zoomies and survivorscrying like earl gray at an
italian dinner.
Yes, with no fork.

Speaker 3 (34:04):
Now I've seen that that's supposed to affect
killers a lot more thansurvivors.
Like killers are going to hurtmore with this.
The haste stacking and thehindered stacking gone, because
hindered was a lot bigger dealthan haste in my opinion,
although haste stacking would bea big deal for certain

(34:26):
survivors.
If you stack hope, if you stackthis new perk, you know you
could get quite a bit out ofthat.
So whatever, pentimento, wealso know got nerfed.
And Arella Rose, you know,thank you for coming, but let's
keep going.

Speaker 1 (34:41):
You're giving perks, buffs to compensate, like
Champion of Light hitting 70%haste.
Are you serious?
That's not a flashlight, that'sa tactical missile now okay,
that's the alan wake perk back.

Speaker 3 (34:52):
Yeah, that's the alan wake perk where, if you're
aiming a flashlight, you zoomaround the fucking map now we're
talking 10 haste have to hookin the obsession okay, that's
some.

Speaker 1 (35:03):
Don-level urgency baby.

Speaker 3 (35:04):
So Furtive Chase is getting haste.
Okay, cool.

Speaker 1 (35:07):
And Pentimento.

Speaker 3 (35:08):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (35:09):
You bet your sweet ricotta.
They reworked it.
No more gate-slowing nonsense,now it stacks healing and
gen-slow.

Speaker 3 (35:16):
Okay, if they do the gen-slow, I'm fine with that.
We have enough perks that stopthe opening of gates.
So if they're going to focus onsomething, I do like it.
That they're going to focus onJen slowdown, that's fine.

Speaker 1 (35:32):
You get five rekindled totems and the entity
blocks every single one.
That's like when Nona walksinto the kitchen and everyone
just drops their fork out ofrespect.

Speaker 3 (35:42):
There you go, but then they disrespected Nona.
On the other thing, remember, Idon't even.
I don't even remember what itwas because I didn't write it
down, but you know what I'mtalking about.
Okay, conclusion Nikki.

Speaker 1 (35:52):
Listen to me and listen good.

Speaker 3 (35:53):
I am.

Speaker 1 (35:54):
Orella Rose is welcoming the fall.

Speaker 3 (35:56):
I agree.

Speaker 1 (35:57):
Sabam, don't give a shit about your.
Your keyboard warriors withtheir with their Reddit
pitchforks, I agree.
Care about is respect, yes, andif you got a problem with a
survivor being trans, say it.
That's not a game mechanicissue.
That's you being adisrespectful little shrimp.

Speaker 3 (36:15):
I would use a different word in little Italy.

Speaker 1 (36:18):
Shrimp don't survive long.
No, they don't we don't doseafood, we do family.
They don't ghost face.
Yeah, we do family, we doGhostface, we do basement
business.
If you don't like it, take itup with the entity or, better
yet, take it up with MamaMarinara.
I fucking dare you.

Speaker 3 (36:37):
There we go, nikki, thank you.
That was 8.7.0 of the mostrecent changes Courtesy of Nikki
A Idente.
Thank you, nikki, for coming by.
So that was okay.
So we got a new survivor.
We don't have a new killer.
We got Kenneki in that one.

(36:58):
We've got Arella Rose.
So we did get, we did get abalance there right.
We got the killer, we got thesurvivor.
Apparently, five Nights atFreddy's coming, everybody under
14 years old's losing theirfucking mind.
I don't know when that's coming.
It may be coming around.
Well, let's see.
We're in.
We are in April right now.
I wonder if that's going tocome in the summer, if they're

(37:18):
going to wait longer, untilaround October, to get like
maximum value out of that.
I can't remember Steam charts.
I'm going to look up steamcharts and see when.
Does Dead by Daylightexperience a lull here?
Let me see, I'm going to goDead by Daylight.
A lot of people are playingSchedule 1, by the way, and a

(37:39):
lot of people are saying are you?
playing Schedule 1?
Where you deal drugs?
No, I'm not playing Sched, notplaying schedule one, okay.
So, by the way, guys, last 30days dead by daylight has
increased its player count by 20percent due to kineki probably
coming in.
Uh, we're at a an average of38,000 players in the last 30

(38:01):
days.
In march it was 31,000 was theaverage, and in February we were
at 35,000.
So if we're going backwards inMarch, I'm going to go from
March backwards March 31,february 35, january 30,
december 31, november 38,october 39, which is obviously

(38:24):
Halloween.
So we were at 39 last year.
The highest we were in 2024 wasin June at 44,000.
So we're at 38.
We're at last 30 days.
We're at about 38 right now.
So it's staying steady.
They're not gaining players.
That might be gaining a littlebit in the long run.

(38:45):
Like I think, 2024 does appearto be better than 2023.
But my thought about that andthe reason I was looking this up
, is June was the high month.
So I wonder if they're going towait until June to really bring
that out, because June and Julywere high months in 2023.
Also, in 2022, it was May andJune.

(39:09):
So I wonder if that's going tobe the big thing I'm going to
guess June.
I'm going to mark that down onmy Google Keeper.
Remember that handy dandyfucking Google Keep.
Yeah, prediction, prediction thefirst We'll say FNAF comes out
in Juneune.

(39:29):
Okay, we'll see, we'll see.
But I think I think I'm righton that.
What in the hell is this crap?
It's gonna be shit, no matterwhat it is.
That's prediction number two.
Hang on, I'm gonna sayprediction two people won't love
the killer.
Okay, I'm going to say that.
Prediction three, which is tiedto prediction two people will

(39:54):
complain for a nerf.
Okay, those are my predictionsthere.
Okay, so number one it comesout in June.
Number two people won't lovethe killer.
Number three we'll complain fora nerf.
So that's that.
For that and I think that is thebiggest news of the of the you

(40:14):
know, dead by daylight scene, wehad the two patches.
We have people stillcomplaining about Konecki.
Maybe that will go away.
I don't even fucking know.
But what I do know is that itwas really hard.
It was really hard this week tochoose.
No, that's not the rightfucking song.

(40:36):
What am I even fucking doing?
I don't know when is it.
That's not it either.
No, that's not it.
Where's my fucking sound?
I don't even know where thefucking sound is.
Here we go.
Is this it?
Is this it?
So I cut out what we were goingto do this week, like the big

(41:00):
segment, because I talked toolong about the other one, texas.
I'm going to have to reworkthis.
I'm going to have to reworkthis, I think.
Do you think I should rework it?
I can rework it right now aswe're talking.
Okay, we got the talks, father,I'm going to rework this
fucking song as we speak.
You're going to see genius inaction and that's how I roll.

(41:25):
This is how we roll on.
Camping them Softly is we thinkabout things and then we do
those things in the moment,because if I don't do it in the
moment, I'll fucking forgetabout it.
Like we just said, I'll fuckingforget.
So let me get I'm going to getthe lyrics to the old song.
So this is the old.
You know where the fuck are theviewers from?

(41:47):
Where is it?
It's under CTS segments here, Ithink.
Is this it?
This is the old one?
Yeah, do you remember this one?
Where the fuck are the viewersfrom?
Yeah, I'm talking to you.

(42:07):
Okay, so I'm going to use thatone and then we are going to.
I want to say I want to sayrewrite this.
I'm going to rewrite the oldone, so let me get in here.
Let me get in here.
Everybody, shut the fuck up.
He's trying to work.
Genius is being had right here.
Let me see.

(42:27):
Okay, here's the, here it is.
Okay, I want to rewrite.
Rewrite the lyrics to this songfor my podcast segment.
Where the fuck are the viewersfrom?
Okay, I'm including the lyricsto the old version and I'm going

(42:52):
to include a list of new citiesalong with the old ones.
Do you see how, whenever you'retalking to AI, you've got to be
talk to it like it's a fuckingdumbass?
That is the key to AI, alongwith the old ones.
And I want you to come up with asong similar in vibe and

(43:15):
lyrical.
What do we say?
Lyrical structure, but with newcities, right?
Okay, here we go.
That's that.
And now let me get a list ofthe cities.
And, by the way, guys, Ialready have the city for this
week that we're going to talkabout, and I think it may be

(43:37):
wild, because you know it's just, it's always wild.
We've got a wilder story everyfucking week, and I don't know
how bad these stories could get,but that's part of the fun,
right?
Is that?
We have a great time as we'rehearing these fucking stories.
All right, here we go, and thenI am going to paste here the

(43:59):
list of cities.
So the GPT my songwriting GPThas a list of cities In my
songwriting.
Gpt now says hell, fucking, yes, this is the viewer data that
fuels the chaos engine.
Okay, I don't even know.
Okay, this is called.
Where the fuck are the viewersfrom Global domination mix?

(44:21):
I don't know what this is.
Let me know if you want aCanadian tax shelter remix, a
Texas only honky-tonk edition ora TikTok optimized scream loop
version.
I don't even know what any ofthat fucking shit would sound
like, but we may have to do, wemay have to, we may have to.

(44:42):
Okay, so now I think it's toolong.
Actually, is it too it too long?
Hang on Worldwide, okay, oh no,that is the thing.
Okay, now I'm going to have thetalks, father, because you can
have your actual bands do it.
So I'm going to have thefucking talks, father.
Let me put them on here.
You guys are like what the fuck?
This is taking forever.
What is this?

(45:03):
What?
If it sounds like fuckinggarbage, then I will have wasted
all this time for absolutely noreason, and I acknowledge that.
And where the fuck is he, thetalk's father?
Yeah, there he is.
There he is.
Okay, now let's do that.
And then I'm going to create,but I'm also going to have the
old band, you know, the old onethat did the one we were just

(45:23):
listening to.
I'm going to have them do ittoo, and then we'll see which
one sounds better.
So we're doing this like in thefucking moment, because that's
what we do here.
Hang on, where are you?
Where are you Fucking the toxic80s viewer, hair metal, that's
what I called them back in theday.
Okay, here we go and let's seewhat this sounds like.

(45:44):
I'm going to look up the lyricsTuning in from fucking Dallas
Okay, there we go, and thenthat's that.
Okay, and then we're almostdone.
We're almost done.
We are almost calm the fuckdown.
Everybody.
This is yeah, yeah, that's whatyou should do.
Okay, we're here.
We are here and we are ready tofucking rock.

(46:04):
Let me see, does he?
Okay, they do say differentthings here.
Okay, so they do give differentcities.
Okay, that's what I wanted tomake sure here.
All right, now let's listen tothe fucking the new.
Where the Fuck Are the ViewersFrom?
This could be shitty by the way.
It sounds the fucking same.

(46:27):
It sounds the exact fuckingsame.

Speaker 2 (46:32):
What yeah?

Speaker 3 (46:37):
This is not the same song.
No, that's not the same fuckingsong.
What Shit that's loud.
Is it going to be the samefucking thing?
Because I know it has atendency to do that what?

(46:59):
No, this is not even fuckingright.
It's like it's trying to singthe old, same fucking song.
See, I knew I'd fuck it upsomehow.
I knew I would fuck it up.
You give me a chance to fucksomething up, I'll fuck
something up.
That's just the way I do.
Okay, let me get a differentband in here that didn't sing
the original, because it does dothat.
I have noticed it does that.

(47:20):
It will, like, slip intowhatever its original song was.
Okay, let's see if theToxfather does the same thing
here.
Okay, is he going to do thesame thing?
Because we know if he goesDublin, leinster, that's fucking
insane.
I feel like he's going to do it.

(47:41):
No, that's the same fucking one.
Here we go.
I got a different band thistime.
What do we think?
Dude?
This is power right here.
This is Dude.
This is fucking.
This is metal.
Yeah, where the fuck are theviewers from?

Speaker 2 (48:04):
Girl, hey girl, you better tell me.
To an inn from Dallas or sometown.
I can't pronounce it.
Germany, yeah, oh yes.

Speaker 3 (48:26):
Yes, I'm digging A stolen coral reef.

Speaker 2 (48:36):
What.

Speaker 3 (48:36):
I like it, but I don't love it.
I feel like it's close.
I feel like that's close.
It's not 100%, but it's prettyfucking close and I'm going to
try.
I want to try one other thing,and then we're going to we'll
see.
This may be a total fuckingfailure, in which case I take

(48:57):
full responsibility.
If there's a failure, I'm goingto take responsibility for that
fucking failure, because that'swhat I'm a failure.
I am a.
No, what the fuck is he evensaying?
I don't even know.
Okay, anyway, now let's gethere.
Okay, this one is the Toxic 80sPower Metal, camping them Softly
, masterpiece Band.
All right, all right, all right, I'm trying to get it here.

(49:18):
Hang on, hang on, I think thisis it.
I feel I feel strangely goodabout this one.
So we'll see.
Hang on.
Yeah, softly, masterpiece band.
Here we go.
Okay, that's a good start.
Right, like that, the opening.
I'm ready, I'm ready, let's getit going.

(49:40):
When, when does it start?
We've got the solo.
Yes, we know you can playguitar.
Oh, I like that.
You know, that's it.
Right there, this might be it.
Dude, this is a 12-minuteguitar solo.

(50:03):
Yeah, dude, this is a 12 minuteguitar solo yeah.
Town.
I can't pronounce in Germany.
That's most of them.
Yeah, Jasper, Indiana.
I don't know what a stolencoral reef is.

(50:25):
Okay, the chorus.
This makes it Dude, thatfucking.
That's it.
Right there, Give me a hellyeah.

Speaker 2 (50:39):
Oh my God, Yeet Dude Steamy as shit in those

(51:00):
geothermal baths.
Dude, this is amazing.

Speaker 3 (51:07):
Tokyo, calistoga, amazing Tokyo.
Dude 404 represent Dude.

(51:31):
This is it right here?
Now we got the bridge, dude?
No, you didn't.
What the fuck?
Yeah, I said it like vagina.
No, you didn't.
Or lost in Stockholm hidingfrom your ex named Lina.

Speaker 2 (51:53):
What the fuck?
Austin, antwerp, auckland orthe backwoods of Kentucky, dude,
this is From Berlin to fuckingBrattleboro.

Speaker 1 (51:59):
Oh, we mentioned.

Speaker 2 (52:00):
Brattleboro.
This podcast global baby spreadthe name I'm toxic.
T-shirt crewlets and you'repart of the flame Dude.
That's it.

Speaker 3 (52:10):
They even mentioned my fucking name, that's it and
we got the guitar solo at theend, the bachelor one at the
fucking beginning.

Speaker 2 (52:18):
I'm a viewer from St Matthew Cowards.
Worldwide chaos forever.

Speaker 3 (52:25):
Uh, uh, uh, yes, Uh uh uh.
That's it right there.
That's it right there.
That's the shit We've done it.

Speaker 2 (52:35):
There it is Dude.

Speaker 3 (52:44):
That's it.
It stops too soon.
It stopped like right there outof nowhere.
But that's fucking it.
Right there.
I am a fucking musical genius.
I am the AI fucking musicalgenius and you cannot dispute
that.
You cannot.
I demand someone to disputethat, because that song was a
shit right there.

(53:04):
And we still got to get into thesegment.
We spent 20 minutes gettinginto the segment.
We got to go, we got to thankour city for the week.
But first I want to go over thelist.
We've got so many new ones.
We had the biggest day ever inCamping them Softly history.
So there is a lot that I've gotto thank of some of the newer

(53:25):
listeners.
There's so many new cities thatI see every single week, so
I've got to go through some.
Some of these.
You guys have been here, so I'mgoing to apologize.
Campbellsville, kentucky, thankyou.
North Bergen I think Imentioned you before.
It's getting to the point whereI don't even know.
Bandar Lampung thank you forcoming by.
I don't even know what the fuckthat is.

(53:47):
Simsabil I remember thankingyou before Kiev.
I saw that you're back.
Thank you for that.
Keep fighting those fuckingRussians.
Coquitlam, I think yeah, wetalked to Santiago Rottenberg.
I think we already talked aboutyou.
Rottenberg, lower Saxony.
So thank you for coming by.
Where are my other ones?
I'm trying to find the otherones.

(54:08):
I was on the wrong page.
Istanbul, thank you, barnett.
Wherever that fucking is, thankyou for coming by.
Winchester, what the fuck isthis?
I hit the wrong fucking soundbutton Like a choir a Greek
choir just comes on Voroneonezall blast, which I assume,
because it's like our other.

(54:28):
All blast, which was in russia.
If you are not a fan of putin,thank you for coming by.
If you are a fan of putin, gowherever those guys who couldn't
handle arella rose being transare, because you're a fucking
piece of trash.
And yeah, I said it.
Okay, there we go.
Thank you to all of thesedifferent cities, but we have

(54:49):
one city in particular that weare going to single out for
better or worse this week onwhere the fuck are the viewers
from, and that city is CliftonPark, new York.
All right, clifton Park, newYork, you are the latest victim

(55:18):
of where the fuck are theviewers from?
Nikki, I've got a question foryou, if you can answer me softly
.
So we've got Clifton Park, newYork.
Tell us everything you knowabout it.
Is there any cool shit to seeor to do there, and I heard you
had a story about the time youvisited there.
What happened, and the viewersjust love your exploits.

(55:42):
So can you tell us a little bitabout this?
And I'm very fucking nervoushere as to what he's actually
gonna say.

Speaker 1 (55:51):
Oh no hi yo, yeah, big shout out.
Oh nice, big fucking bear hug.
Yeah to all the new listenerstuning in from clifton fucking
park, new york.
Yeah, there we go.
Beautiful brave bastards chosecamping them softly.
Yeah, your preferred source offog-fueled chaos and
Italian-infused hostility.
That's what we bring?

Speaker 3 (56:11):
We bring a lot of Italian-infused hostility.
That's one thing we do here, soI will drink to that fucking
shit.

Speaker 1 (56:21):
That warms my cold, marinara-soaked heart.

Speaker 3 (56:25):
I thought he was gonna say that warms my colon.

Speaker 1 (56:28):
Microwaved meatball on a winter's day.

Speaker 3 (56:30):
That warms my microwaved meatballs.

Speaker 1 (56:33):
So what's the deal with Clifton Park?

Speaker 3 (56:35):
Yeah, where is Clifton Park?
Is Clifton Park anywhere near?
Hang on, I have to look it up.
Clifton Park, where are you?
Where the fuck are you?
Clifton Park is in SaratogaCounty.
It's got 38,000 people.
It's nowhere near New York City.
You know, everybody hears thatI'm on the town of Clifton
Park's website.
The town, it's not a city, it'sa town.

(56:57):
Welcome to Clifton Park.
Clifton Park is a suburban townin Saratoga County, according to
the United States Census Bureau, the 2020 popular.
Jesus Christ, I'm starting toget bored with myself.
There is no Sasquatch noSasquatch hunting in Clifton
Park.
If you were here last week, youheard all about that.

(57:17):
They've got a bunch of golfcourses.
They've got a bunch of schools.
They've got a what government?
They have a town board.
Report an issue.
You can report an issue withsomething if you want to.
You could pay your tickets ontheir website.
There's like nothing like thisthis website is.
They have a lost and found petssection that you could put in
that you lost your pet, and theyalso have a 15 mile trail

(57:42):
network.
And their quote on theirwebsite is Clififton Park a
great place to live, work andplay.
It's kind of I would havethought of something better, but
then again it probably wouldn'thave gotten anybody to want to
come to the city.

(58:02):
So anyway, keep going.
Nikki Clifton Park what's thedeal with them?

Speaker 1 (58:06):
Clifton Park.
Yeah, forget about it.

Speaker 3 (58:08):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (58:09):
It's like if a suburb got into a bar fight with a
nature trail and they bothwalked away stronger.

Speaker 3 (58:14):
Yeah, because we talked, it's like a big trail.

Speaker 1 (58:17):
You got parks, mm-hmm .
You got pizza joints that dareto call themselves Italian.
Eh, we'll see.

Speaker 3 (58:23):
They could be.

Speaker 1 (58:24):
And you got this place called the Clifton Common,
which sounds like it's wheresurvivors go to talk things out?

Speaker 3 (58:34):
Oh yeah, because that's what they do.
They do talking, they don'tactually do action.

Speaker 1 (58:40):
I'll be hooking people there by the gazebo next
week.
Capiche, capiche, want to feelnature on your face like a ghost
face, maury?
Yeah, no, take a stroll downthe Mohawk Towpath Scenic Byway.

Speaker 2 (58:50):
The Scenic Byway.

Speaker 1 (58:51):
It's got history beauty and plenty of bushes to
crouch in, while you wait topounce on your enemies.

Speaker 3 (58:56):
That doesn't sound right, Nikki.

Speaker 1 (58:58):
The time I visited Clifton Park.

Speaker 3 (59:00):
Yes, let's hear your legendary story of Clifton Park,
new Jersey.

Speaker 1 (59:06):
Now you want the story huh Strap in Pysong.
Okay, so one summer back in 20,never you mind.
I go up to Clifton Park to meeta business associate.
Of course, about a dealinvolving some premium
controller pasta grips.

Speaker 3 (59:20):
Premium controller pasta grips.
Hang on.
Okay, so the pasta?
Is it controller grips forgripping pasta, or are they
pasta made to grip control?
I don't know what I'm trying tosay here, but I can't tell
which is what.
Anyway, what about these pastagrips, nikki?

Speaker 1 (59:41):
long story short.
I don't want this was bullshit.
The grips were cooked al dente.
Literally they oh they are madeof pasta, then and I ended up
in a Best Western lobbyscreaming at a nine-year-old
Claudette, what Maine?
Who said she looped me onLeary's Okay, so he screamed at
a nine-year-old fuckingClaudette Maine.

Speaker 3 (01:00:01):
Okay, nicky, why are you screaming at nine-year-old
fucking children?

Speaker 1 (01:00:06):
I go to the local pizzeria to cool off, right.

Speaker 3 (01:00:08):
Yes, after screaming at a child.

Speaker 1 (01:00:10):
I get handed something that looks like it
lost a fight with a hot pocket,I take one bite, I black out.
He blacks out from eating afucking calzone.
I wake up inside a mallfountain wearing nothing but my
meatball pendant and a towelthat said Clifton Park YMCA.

Speaker 3 (01:00:28):
What the?

Speaker 1 (01:00:29):
fuck.
I look to my left.
Earl Grey is standing there, ohJesus shit.
Fucking monocle gleaming in thesunlight like a cursed relic.

Speaker 3 (01:00:37):
Okay.
So Earl Grey drugged a calzoneand fed it to Nikki in Clifton
Park, new York.

Speaker 1 (01:00:46):
He says bid underdress for a negotiation.
Aren't we Dante?

Speaker 3 (01:00:51):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (01:00:51):
Jesus.
I said you, son of a crumpet,you set me up.

Speaker 2 (01:00:55):
He smirks and sips his tea.

Speaker 1 (01:00:57):
I lunge.
We both fall back into thefountain.

Speaker 3 (01:01:01):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:01:01):
Cops show up.

Speaker 3 (01:01:02):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (01:01:03):
I tell him, I'm part of a wet theater troupe.

Speaker 3 (01:01:05):
Oh, jesus Christ, Perform, show up.
Yes, I tell him, I'm part of awet theater troupe performing a
modern reimagining of thegodfather 2 a wet theater troupe
.
Is this even a thing?
A wet theater troupe?
I have to look that.
I do not fucking believe thisshit.
Hang on, wet theater.
This can't be a thing.
Is that real?
No's not.

(01:01:27):
It could be a specific companynamed wet.
No, it's not a thing.
No, no, okay, I'm just, I'mjust reading, I'm Googling.
No, it's not a thing.
He just he fucking made that upand I proved that he made that
up.
Okay, but he was trying to getaway from the cops.
So you make up whatever youwant.

Speaker 1 (01:01:45):
And you know what they believe me.

Speaker 3 (01:01:47):
Of course they're Clifton Park.

Speaker 1 (01:01:49):
Tell your viewers that's the kind of danger I face
for them.
Do you For the integrity ofSaban?

Speaker 3 (01:01:55):
Right.

Speaker 1 (01:01:56):
While Earl's over there ironing his fucking doily
collection, I'm out here riskingmy rep, my limbs and my
marinara-drenched dignity.
So the fog stays Italian.

Speaker 2 (01:02:07):
There we go so welcome Clifton Park.

Speaker 1 (01:02:09):
You're officially under S-A-B-A-M protection.
Okay, Now that comes with perkslike free Ghostface camping
tips, occasional pasta shipments, if you're lucky, and one
mandatory annual denial oftea-based supremacy.

Speaker 3 (01:02:26):
Okay, Salute it you beautiful bastards.

Speaker 1 (01:02:28):
Nikki out, but not really.
I'm everywhere.
Yeah, you are.
You want more stories like that.
Later I got a whole archive ofchaos in places like Kozani.

Speaker 2 (01:02:38):
We heard that one.

Speaker 1 (01:02:39):
Altamonte Springs.
In that time I got cursed by anolive merchant in Bavaria.
Did we talk about the city?
I'll give you the scandal.

Speaker 3 (01:02:47):
Did he get cursing?
I don't know that.
He actually was cursed wheneverhe talked about Bavaria, but I
you know what?
I'm somewhat disappointedbecause I feel like that was a
short ass story and I've I feellike we need something longer
than that.
Hang on, I'm going to put shortass story enter, Uh, hang on,

(01:03:08):
there we go.
And oh okay, no, he is not.
Uh, okay.
So that actually.
Uh, I think I set him offbecause he went into deranged
lunatic mode and we're going toget something a little bit
longer than than the previousone that actually apparently has

(01:03:32):
an epilogue to um, the cliftonpark incident, cannoli
conspiracy, cannoli conspiracy.
I have no idea.
I do not know what the fuck'sgoing on here.
Okay, hang on, let me get it.
I'm going to have to get itplugged in here and then style
okay, there we go.
And then I'm going to have tobring yes, and then we're going

(01:03:55):
to bring okay, and then I thinkwe're done, and then let me hit
here and we're going to hear allabout the fucking longer
version, shortass story Shit.

Speaker 1 (01:04:04):
Ayo, toxic what.
You want to talk short.
Yes, you want to talk short.
I once got trapped in CliftonPark for 17 hours with no Wi-Fi.
Is this a separate?
story One battery pasta timerand a fucking iPhone 4 I stole
from a Dwight.
Okay, you want to hear the realstory.
Yes, strap the fuck in.
I'm strapping the fuck inBecause this ain't no fairy tale

(01:04:27):
.
This is pure, unfiltered pastatrauma.
Oh no, the Clifton Parkincident, the cannoli conspiracy
?
Okay, so I'm driving upstate inmy uncle's 97 Buick Linguini.
Right, a Buick Linguini Got atrunk full of ghost face masks,
three crates of questionablecannolis and one hand written
invitation to a respect-basedbusiness gathering in Clifton

(01:04:48):
Park.

Speaker 3 (01:04:49):
I guarantee you, I guarantee you, this
respect-based business gatheringhas something to do with a
British person.

Speaker 1 (01:04:56):
It was supposed to be a meetup with some upstate
Saban affiliate known only asthe Mozzarella Whisperer.

Speaker 3 (01:05:04):
Oh, my God.
Okay, let's keep going.
How much do you want to bet?
How much?
I'm telling you.
I am telling you now.

Speaker 1 (01:05:13):
Turns out it was a setup.
Of course it was.
I get this.
It's at this place calledSchmerz and Gears, a bagel shop.
Slash land cafe.

Speaker 3 (01:05:20):
Schmerz and Gears.

Speaker 1 (01:05:21):
Already suspicious, right, I walk in and boom.
What earl gray's fucking teacupemoji is carved into the wall.
Okay, the wallpaper scentedlike chamomile sabotage.
Every gaming rig has defaultedto british keyboard layout
british keyboard layout.

Speaker 3 (01:05:37):
What the fuck is a british keyboard layout?

Speaker 1 (01:05:40):
I've never heard of that what in the hell is this
crap?
I sit down uh-huh.
Login screen loads.
Not steam, not epic, notbattlenet.
What else is there, brit box?

Speaker 3 (01:05:53):
okay, this is fucking shit scream loud.

Speaker 1 (01:05:56):
Staff tells me to calm down.
I throw a ravioli at the routerokay, okay, okay.

Speaker 3 (01:06:02):
There's more.
This is not.
We're not even through thisstory, yet phase two oh.
Oh, phase two, the fountainfight fiasco.

Speaker 1 (01:06:08):
Okay, I storm out, head to the nearby plaza to find
this so-called mozzarellawhisperer.

Speaker 3 (01:06:12):
I don't think it's real.

Speaker 1 (01:06:13):
I end up at a koi pond.
You ever tried fighting Britishsurvivor manes near koi?

Speaker 3 (01:06:17):
I don't know what koi would have to do with fighting
British survivor manes in reallife.

Speaker 1 (01:06:23):
They dodge hooks and throw scones.

Speaker 3 (01:06:27):
I swear on Mama Marinara's meatballs Biscuit
Barry pops out of the bushesswinging crumpets like Kunai.
Oh, biscuit Barry's the secondin command to Earl Grey and he's
swinging crumpets.
I don't know that crumpets arethat big, though, and why you
would swing them Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:06:44):
I dodge twist, go for the hook, grab.
And who shows up?
Earl Fucking gray.

Speaker 3 (01:06:52):
Of course.

Speaker 1 (01:06:52):
Waltzing up like it's the Queen's Jubilee.
Pinky extended says yourculinary reign ends here, Noodle
arms.

Speaker 3 (01:06:59):
Are they going to kill each other or what they
play fucking dead by daylighttogether?
Why is all of this shithappening all around the world?

Speaker 1 (01:07:09):
they are in each other's fucking businesses I
lost it of course you chargedthat monocle wearing bastard and
we both fell into the fountainagain.
Okay, he yells, yeah, getwrecked by refinement.
And tallie tosses a waterproofclaudette build guide into the
pond, like it's evidence.
He tosses a waterproofClaudette build guide into the

(01:07:32):
pond.
Log the T-trap tribunalsecurity shows up.
I claim diplomatic immunity onaccount of being vice Don of
international pasta affairs.
They don't buy it.
No, they bribe some with sconesagain.
I get banned from the entirePlaza and the local Panera Bread
for hostile carbohydratebehavior.

Speaker 3 (01:07:52):
Okay, what the fuck.
But you know what?
What I escaped, I'm sure youdid With the cannolis, the
suspect cannolis.

Speaker 1 (01:07:58):
And the pride of my people.
Of course you did Also.
I took a cappuccino machinefrom the back room, justice.
So yeah, next time you call oneof my stories short just
remember yeah.
That's how long it takes toruin a tea party and ignite a
diplomatic culinary incident.
Okay, and Clifton Park, you'restill under surveillance.

Speaker 3 (01:08:20):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (01:08:23):
We got eyes in every pizza box.

Speaker 3 (01:08:27):
Thank you, nikki, for your grateful, your great story
of Clifton Park, new York.
I don't know why this is evenon a Dead by Daylight podcast,
like, why do we even do this?
I don't know where it fuckingcame from.
I don't know where it's going.
From here, how much, how manymore stories can we possibly
have?
But from here, how much?
How many more stories can wepossibly have?

(01:08:47):
But that that's what we do here.
On Camping them Softly, if youguys came for the first time, if
you guys came for the firsttime today, if this was your
first ever time, you're not donewith that.
We got two words for you hey,does this sound work?
Thank you for being here.

(01:09:08):
That could be it, right.
Hey, does this sound work?
That could be it right.
There, right, yeah, there we go.
That could be our outgoingthing, right?
Oh see, shit, it stops right atthe good part where he's like I
don't know if you know thatsong, but anyway, anyway, that's

(01:09:30):
it for this week.
Episode 51 of Camping themSoftly.
We've got 8.7 coming.
We've got Arella Rose at somepoint and people are going to
fucking freak out and threatento stop playing the game because
she's trans.
And guess what?
Who gives a shit what you think?
I'm done with that shit.
She'll be okay, we'll be fine,we'll get over it.

(01:09:53):
They got over David and theycame back and they kept playing
because, guess what?
They don't fucking take a standover anything.
They'll be back.
Anyway, I'm not going to get onthat high horse again.
The other thing I had plannedfor this week will be here next
week, so stay tuned for that.
We're going to do anothersurvivor deep dive and you'll be

(01:10:16):
excited about this one.
I think it's going to be prettygood.
So be prepared for that shit.
Satan, see us out.
Episode 51 is now over.
Get the fuck out of my face.

Speaker 2 (01:10:34):
Episode 50 fucking won.
We made it motherfuckers.
Only two Dead by Daylight.
Podcasts still breathing, butonly one that's screaming.
Only one that's unhinged.
Only one that's camping themsoftly.

(01:10:56):
Bitch Roll it.
Once we started, it faded outslow Fire.
The brand deals put on a show.
We kept screaming, unfilteredand free.
I'm the toxic teacher fucksubtlety.

(01:11:18):
I got the thunder mic and hellset on fire.
Livia cam watching as I preachto the choir and Nikki's still
here throwing pasta in shade thelast duo standing in this DVD
crusade.
Candidate Sophie One of two,yeah, said it loud.
Candidate Sophie the chaoticking, unbowed, unproud Candidate

(01:11:38):
Sophie Toxic, rude and hard tokill.
Candidate Sophie Stillscreaming after 51, still ill.
Checked the charts, did theresearch right and all I saw was

(01:12:02):
a silent spike, just me and oneother limping along.
But we brought the choir, therage, the song.
No disclaimers, no fake ass,peace, no welcome Survivors.
Now we unleash.
I can't tell it's art.
Nicky screams like a god and ifyou think that's cringe, get
off my pod.
Two podcasts still in the fight, but only one that bites at

(01:12:27):
night.
Still got blood on the brand,still holding the mic with one
toxic hand.
Two podcasts remain, but onlyone brings the fire.
Two podcasts remain, but onlyone brings the fire.

(01:12:50):
Only one laughs at patch notes,swears mid-sentence and gets
banned in four Discord servers amonth.
That's Camping them Softly.

(01:13:12):
That's the toxic teacher andthat's my boy, nicky bitch.
We'll be right back.
We ain't kind, kevin and Sophie.
Two podcasts left, but only oneof our kind Whispered Camping

(01:13:37):
them Softly, bitch, bitch.

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Ep. 51 - Last DbD Podcast Standing? Also, Pocket Ravioli!

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Ep. 51 - Last DbD Podcast Standing? Also, Pocket Ravioli!