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April 22, 2023 • 23 mins

On our journey to recovery and healing, when our resilience feels has disappeared, we tend to focus on what things have not gone right.

Today we focus on why that may be, and we will do a visualisation to find a compassionate and kind vow to ourselves, that will help you to work on what it matters and is valuable for you!

Hope you enjoy.

Remember to follow the podcast and share it if you like it 😊

Jaime

Website: https://Online-cbt.com

Twitter: https://twitter.com/CBTOnline_

#buildingresiliace #beyourbestself #podcast #mentalhealthmatters #nurtureyourself

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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:07):
Hello one. Welcome again to this podcast
I'm Jaime online.com so you can drop me an email if you need or
you want to give me feedback or any DC if you wish for us to
think about something that's perfectly fine.

(00:28):
And today we are I never knew podcast and thanks for the.
I've been having more time series.
I've been able to do a few more podcasts that be great.
I hope you enjoyed the last podcast and the please, the A's
and the B's where interesting and hopefully you manage with

(00:49):
Device utilization. Get you some of those little
steps that you may want to get through on think that it will
build your risk resilience. So today what we are going to do
is you're gonna have a bit of a last last episode.
I spoke about the bit of a why we may be focusing on negative
things. And I thought we met maybe Booth

(01:11):
worth for us to have a bit of explanation, how I explain in
with people. I work with wipe things made my
my my Why that might be the case.
So after that, I'll think we'll revisit against resilience and
we'll we'll try to make a voucher with selves will try to

(01:34):
see how that works. Okay, so I hope you enjoy.
I once again, thank you for tuning in.
Right. So I was thinking about why we
may be focusing on on think so 10, how how I tend to explaining

(01:54):
that this is from a sort of revolutionary emotional Theory,
doesn't mean that. This is the only Theory doesn't
say that this is the valid Theory.
This is the one that I think I believe is sort of More likely

(02:14):
or that explains better, why certain things why we behave and
we feel and we think in a certain way when we are facing
certain circumstances. So how I tend to explain it
always is about sort of when we evolved when we sort of way back

(02:38):
to know how many Millennials agomillenniums ago.
We sort of were living in in thewilderness, the wildest so we
had to survive. So the way things we did so we
we sort of gather in people in mobs, in crowds in, you know

(02:59):
what, it just like a like a pact, right?
So we have P. We gather together.
Well, we did then is sort of started communicating and I
started thinking you know, that might not be exactly the same
stay that's not an exact timeline but it's sort of make

(03:21):
them happen at the same time on different time so please bear
with me. This that doesn't mean that it
is like you know, Sofia anyway. So when it happened is that the
some point through that Evolution, we had To survive.
And then we started to survive. What happens is when we think

(03:43):
about developing thinking cognition, We we have those
emotions that will help us to fight flight or sometimes freeze
which is a reptilian part of ourbrain, which will be discussing
another time. Anyway.
So what happens is that if you were to think, you went out for

(04:04):
a walk or I was out for a walk, don't you go to collect some
fruit was lovely or some nice vegetables and I found Dab a or
a tiger or a mammoth. I will be scared and then I
would either fight it, freeze itor fright, it flight or freeze.

(04:30):
So more likely example would be that I would fly yet.
So I will run away answer to go back to my past.
Go to my crowd, to that tribe and sort of explain it
communicated. And then we there with the star
thing. Taking what was about that
place? How do I get there was signs,

(04:52):
were there. What did we do, right?
What did we do wrong? What could have improved, what
should be done differently. So, we started to problem solve
that with the intention that we are learning from it.
I'm then next season next week, then we can figure out how to

(05:14):
overcome those problems. So then that's when we start to
think future. So we're thinking in the past to
make sure that we don't make thesame mistake.
So to, through go through thingsand we think into the future.
So we can problem solve, similarly scenarios, and then we
can be in the Here and Now collecting hunt hunting and

(05:36):
survive. She so that was really helpful
back then and it is helpful. Now, some of us, they have that
process more and some of Art andfinds himself worrying about the
future excessively. So there is a lot of what ifs or
a lot of Doubt or a lot of sort of time to problem-solve
situations that have not happened and they are varied.

(05:59):
And these thoughts, the thoughtsabout these situations then are
very distressing and then some of us I'd be very much about
thinking in the past and focusing on the negative.
So, to learn from their past. So sometimes called rumination.
So, with ruminate on certain things, What happens in both
scenarios is when we thinking into the future.

(06:21):
Then we magnify we sort of have a distorted version of the
future, maybe, when we're thinking about the path
sometimes, when we go through a nice scenario time, and time
again on an event in our life time and time again.
Sometimes some people have identified people, I work with

(06:44):
the actions that he feels that it Changes, right?
All we trying to implement things that we didn't do too, so
make it right in our mind, right?
But we can't really change, but with Roman and so that would be
thinking future intuitive. Ruminate is what the Harper
says. Well, now, what resilience is
down When there's a lot of things happening, it is natural.

(07:10):
Process of survival, gets activated.
All right. Today, there are no Tigers to
Dynamic method. They are not, there are not
other things so that there are some survival.
So, I work with some police officers, military personal,

(07:32):
first time, fizz, fizz fizz responders I work with people to
work in a very stressful jobs. So, sometimes that very same
process is really helpful in those situations and is really
helpful to survive mine, whetheryou're going to fight the
situation or we are gonna flightwill park again with park again

(07:56):
that Reptilian Brain by freeze. So that is a really helpful and
that is what keep us. It was kept us alive through
Millennials and it's got that here and that being part of a
tribe communicating and think. We overcome some of the largest
animals that would we would haveeat us or would kill us.

(08:19):
Okay. So, when we, our resilience is
now, when we've done time and time again, will we can do we
start to see some that we can't that that gets activated?
And we perhaps start thinking more about the future about
Heidi's traffic or we thinking about the past.
And that's where we start thinking very negatively.

(08:39):
A of a week. A know why cannot do.
So in the last episode, I mentioned about having a record
of what we actually do that these successful and we can
bring to our awareness. So especially we feeling
hopeless or helpless and feels that there is no way out and

(09:03):
we've been really hard put in adding those positive emotions
and accumulating those emotions I will be building on some of
these activities that we enjoy and we feel that we're going to
proficient. A mastering then getting that
part will always help us to recall back those times and

(09:27):
acknowledge and validate that wemay be really resilient and we
really want To be the best out of ourselves.
And then this particularly time today, I'm not feeling 100%.
And what I'm thinking, is sort of a way, of problem solving and

(09:48):
emotion or that they are perceived danger.
And that is because we go back to the positive data log, or the
positive diary, or the journaling, or the voice
messages, to remind us that yet.Today, feels our way.
Now, three weeks ago, it was a different matter and I could

(10:09):
cope. So what can I take from that and
apply today? And how would that change my
future thinking, right? So that is a very natural if you
want to know more about it. If you want me to be more in
detail, please drop me a line. You can do so through my website

(10:31):
online, hyphen central.com, and you can contact easy.
As wait, podcast ad online hyphen, supe t.com and we kind
of spend that kind of spend. It usually takes around half an
hour to 45 minutes from me to gothrough things and we and I, we
can take that time. So, What happens is when we are

(10:54):
not, when we are resilient is impacted, we then might be
focusing more on the - from whatwe have, or we cannot achieve or
what we cannot get over. And if you remember a few
episodes ago, we had the visualization about how to
forward, what would have, we learn from the past, right?

(11:14):
So you can use that visualization with this positive
data log. Or that scripture that's voice
messages and say, alright, okay let's do this visualization.
Let's see. What was that about?
Okay, all these all what I discussed or what I share with
you all what we do in this journey of healing and regaining

(11:36):
your resilience is accumulative.So one thing may not work for
you, you can use another one. However, all of them can be used
regularly on the top, on the top, one on the top.
Okay, how we do that? One of the things I invite
everyone is taking 30 minutes, 45 minutes of the week just

(11:57):
taking a set. I think what, how what, how has
been my weight? But did I sit here last?
We can set for me to do how did I go?
Well what do I what? How is my resilience today?
You can write it from zero to ten.
Has are there any external factors that are impacting my

(12:18):
resilience? This is only about me and take
those 30 minutes checking out inyourself.
Reviewing, what you, what you should've looked at last week or
last month and then setting yourself what is helpful for the
next week. And then, you can take that
forward and review it again. Okay, so I hope that is

(12:40):
clarified really place. I would appreciate if you
contact me if you wanted to cover, Bill detail, episode this
and now we'll move to the next step.
Hope you enjoyed Hi, and now again we will have another

(13:01):
visualization will have another time where you start to hear the
Chimes or the bells of the fish is a pencil.
Be honest with you. It depends what I find.
I have some sounds, and it's theone I find today that feels more
right with the visualization. So, once again, we feel safe.

(13:23):
It is you're in a safe place. You, you are such relaxing, not
doing anything else. You will just about to listen to
this podcast on visualization, allows you to close your eyes
and take a deep breath in and a long breath out.

(13:45):
An alarm and another deep breathin.
And a long breath out, I pray and I would like you to bring
your awareness again. She that Park.
She thought wrote that the street that place where you
Society unclean Nation. Are you going to start walking
out towards that Meadow? Where that perfect, sit, perfect

(14:11):
place, where you could sit and rest?
Ace. This time.
Fixes slightly easier to walk. I've done Meadow.
It just feels a bit more. Paste.

(14:37):
And you notice that it you don'tget as tired. and if you do
that's perfectly fine, you can, once again, take a break, Look
around. Enjoy the scenery.
When you're ready, continue walking out.

(14:59):
As you can to the top. I should notice the sun and the
breeze and the lovely weather that Meadow that blue sky.
And notice how that feels. You risk in your eyes.

(15:21):
And invite you to have start some grass.
Smells of flowers, make your wayto that's it.
The comfortable place, the wrong, a chair next, should
stream, what I need. 103, whatever they fight, whatever
you mind needs to him and you feel calm and content.

(15:47):
Not sure that you should take a deep breath and a long breath
out. Now, I would like you to reflect
everybody matters to you. What core values?
Do you have in your life? What is important?

(16:15):
And when you're doing so it's continue breathing in.
I'm no longer breathing. And notice how that feels bring
into your awareness. Those values and that's things
are bad. And just reflect on what you may
have done in the last few weeks,would you make that it's been a

(16:40):
line with your values. And that is Ben An action that
you've been accumulated to be your best self.
Whatever that is. And if he comes a thought, Or a
memory of the last week, the last month.

(17:01):
When you shifting your attentionchoose, what it didn't go.
Well, take a deep breath in and a long breath out and then
knowledge, the fact that that's perfectly normal But that's what
we do. I'm will be are designed to do.

(17:23):
No, we cannot. Undo it.
And we have the choice to focus back on what it matters and I've
liked it. To focus on that your values are
morning, Amanda's. Now, as you're focusing on that

(17:44):
value, somebody matters to you. I would like you to think.
I will let you imagine. To bring.
A path. Or a tablet.
Or a magical pen. A have a pen that draws.

(18:09):
Lovely clouds. Somewhere where you can't take a
note of this value makes yourself.

(18:31):
And now I'll ask you to get thatpet.
We're done typing machine, whatever it is.
I would like you to think. And right on your own words.
How a vow or a self-referring statement?

(18:58):
That will help you live according what it matters to
you. if these words, Don't feel kind and compassionate.
You can change them. You may want to write what you

(19:24):
would like to do. You may want to write.
What you would like to? Meat.

(19:51):
We don't want any words. That bring the sense of
pressure. No shoots, no.
Must know what Only boots. May's alikes. may I be patient

(20:21):
with myself. May, I be patient with myself
when I make a mistake. May I be kind to myself?
No chutes. No codes.
Know what? if you notice that there are

(20:46):
some of these shoots so knots and could, You can kindly.
Change those words and remind yourself.
What were you doing is really difficult and at this particular
time you may be needing more resilient. when you've written

(21:08):
that bow down as you chew, closeyour eyes again in your memory
as you are in a image. And notice how that feels.
You can bring into your heart toyour mind, you can put it
between your hands. No ^.

(21:31):
That value makes yourself. Now, I'd like you to take a deep
breath in and along the thumb. And turn around, stand up, turn
around, be grateful for this Meadow.
And notice how he feels. Making a voucher, be or

(21:56):
resilience. According to, when he passed.
Now, I'm invite you again to walk down that path, that wrote.
That is straight. On the count of five. 432.

(22:26):
Take a deep breath in and open your eyes.
Thank you for joining. I hope you enjoy.
I hope it's been helpful. You're more than welcome to
write down that. Wow, on the paper or somewhere
and then see it in the Press. Yeah, and this is all for today.

(22:55):
I hope you really enjoyed. I hope the imagery was helpful.
And once again, Remind yourself that that kindness that
compassion is always important for your own resilience.

(23:18):
And how I know say thank you fortuning in.
You can follow me, you can subscribe, I can send me an
email to your podcast, sad all night, iPhones, the ratite.
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