Holiday Expectations

Holidays are difficult for people who have dysfunctional families. They are also painful for people with loss and bad memories. While you cannot change the circumstances, one of the things you can do is to change your expectations. Watch this video to see how this simple change can make a big difference. #changeexpectations #holidayemotions #dysfunctionalfamilies

 

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Watch this video on YouTube: https://youtu.be/ZDxMivGYs8M

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
You're listening to an audio recordingby Change My Relationship, featuring
licensed marriage and family therapistand author Karla Downing.
These audios are designed to provide youwith practical solutions
based on biblical truthsfor all your relationships.

(00:20):
I am going to read
you December 23rd out of my book, Change

My Relationship (00:25):
365
Daily Devotions for Christiansin Difficult Relationships.
I'm reading you all of the holidaydevotions, one in each video.
And today is December 23rdand it's called Holiday Expectations.
The lips of the righteous knowwhat finds favor,

(00:46):
but the mouth of the wickedonly what is perverse.
Proverbs 1032
family, love, joy.
Peace.
Happiness. Togetherness.
Fun, laughter.
These reminders all around us
telling us how our holidays should look.

(01:08):
But if our situation prevents usfrom experiencing
these things,we need to adjust our expectations.
When we adjust our expectations,we let go of the ideal holiday.
We open ourselves upto celebrating a different way,
maybe in a different time,maybe with different people.
By letting go of our expectations,we allow ourselves to accept things

(01:31):
as they are.
We open ourselves up to the possibilityof finding those things
in places and circumstancesthat aren't where we usually look.
If it feels impossibleto get through the day,
we can remind ourselves that it isonly one 24 hour
period out of 365.

(01:53):
We can do it. We've done it before.
We can remind ourselvesthat we aren't alone.
Christ came to redeem brokenpeople in a broken world.
Our difficult relationshipsand circumstances
are a part of living in that brokenness.
When we let go of expectations,we can enjoy whatever good comes our way.

(02:15):
And often timeswhen we let go of our expectations,
we will be pleasantly surprisedrather than disappointed
when our expectations are unrealisticfor our circumstances.
So adjust your expectations.
What are you expecting this holiday?
Is it unreasonable?

(02:35):
Is it unattainable?
Is it unlikely?
Are you likely to get disappointed?
Change your expectations.
Look at them. Look at
something different as a possibility.
Allow God to do something new.
Allow God to bring in answers

(02:59):
or bring in opportunitiesthat you wouldn't normally look for.
So it's only one day.
It doesn’t have to be the wayit's always been.
It doesn’thave to be exactly like you want it.
It can be.
Wonderful, miraculous,
marvelous day in a brand new way.

(03:21):
Or it can just be 24 hoursthat you get through.
Because this year,the holidays are really painful for you.
Sometimes they are.
And it just is what it is,and there is no other way around it.
The prayer says, God,
help me to adjust my expectations

(03:44):
so I will be unexpectedly surprisedrather than disappointed.
I pray for youthat you will be unexpectedly surprised
during these
holidays rather than disappointed.
Thank you for listeningto Change My Relationship.
We hope you will subscribe to thesepodcasts and share them with your friends.

(04:07):
Karla would love to hear from you.
She welcomes ideas for a future podcast,as well as your feedback
on how the podcasts have helped your lifeand relationships.
You can email her at.
[e-mail]
For more informationon Change My Relationship and Karla
Downing's ministry, including her books,studies, devotionals, podcasts

(04:31):
and YouTube videosvisit changemyrelationship.com.