July 4, 2025 • 12 mins
These are the things that nobody talks about when it comes to building a coaching business, or business in general. It's not the systems that hold us back and make us resent our business, it's the stories. It's the voice in our head that says "you don't deserve this" or "it's not safe being seen"
So you play small. Try to fit in. Sell what everyone else is selling.
F*ck that.
If you're done playing small and are ready to step fully into yourself, send me a DM on instagram today with "BREAKTHROUGH"
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
the amount of times that I've been so incredibly
close to burning my businessesdown in the past, I mean, we
wouldn't be here today, guys.
And I see coaches every singleweek who, all of a sudden, I'll
check in on their stuff, andthat they, yeah, man, I'm going
to start with you next month,I'm just getting some stuff
(00:21):
together.
They haven't posted in a month,they're not doing it anymore,
and sometimes it's the rightcall.
More often, though, I know,because this has been happening
for a few years, I check in onthem a couple of years later.
How'd you do it?
(00:47):
How do you stay going?
And that's the thing, guys.
We look for these systems, welook for this organizational
toolkit, we look for thisdashboard, we look for the ad
strategy, and all of that isjust an add-on to the most
important piece, and that'srecognizing what levers are
being pulled when we are in ourbusiness.
I see individuals go throughnasty divorces, nasty breakups,
(01:09):
and then start blaming theirbusiness for their life, not to
mention, like, the choices theymade along the way, or maybe the
fact that the other person wasjust toxic, but because they're
now in this raw emotional state,they want to burn their
business to the ground that theyjust had a record fucking month
in Guys.
The victim mentality is anacquired personality trait where
(01:30):
we, the victim mentality is anacquired personality trait where
a person tends to regardthemselves as the victim of the
negative actions of others, evenin the absence of clear
evidence, and it depends on ahabitual thought process and
attributions, attributions.
Aka, if we have stories runningin our head that say, nope, I'm
(01:55):
not worthy of this business,nope, I'm not that person that
makes this money, then as westart to toe up against that
line, that edge of our identity,guess what is going to happen?
We're going to say things likenah, man, it took too much work
to get here.
No, I just I don't enjoy thisbusiness Really.
Like, maybe that's true andmaybe there's ways to fix that,
(02:20):
as opposed to saying, nope, Ineed to burn it down because I
believe that I don't deservethis level of income.
I don't believe that I am theperson who deserves to run a
business like this.
I don't believe that I am theperson who can go out and be
fully seen in my rawestexpression of me, fully
(02:45):
delivering my unique gifts tothe world.
I don't believe that.
So what am I going to do?
I'm not going to admit that, Idon't believe that, because that
would actually crack the dooropen into me shifting that
belief and having to step into anew paradigm.
So I'm just going to take thislittle, this piece of evidence
that I can find over here andI'm going to attribute it to my
shit can find over here and I'mgoing to attribute it to my shit
(03:06):
story around my business andI'm going to say, nope, business
just isn't for me, it's allsnake oil, it's all just like
once you see how the sausage ismade, it's all just sausage.
Guys, like the amount of peoplewho are waiting, who I'll back
this up If I had quit, if I hadfolded up shop before COVID,
(03:29):
there was a couple of roughmonths well before COVID where I
actually sat down with my dadand went to tears so, man, I
might have to sell my car, mychildhood car, the car I said
I'd never sell again, my Camaroto keep the gym afloat.
And we sat down, we had a longtalk and we found a way around
(03:50):
it and my landlord stretched onemonth of rent throughout the
end of the year.
And guess what, guys, westarted having record months in
the gym, like heading into COVID.
We had our best month ever, andit wasn't because I found some
new system, it was because Imoved through the story that was
(04:12):
saying, no, I don't, I don'tdeserve the gym, so that must
mean I don't deserve this careither, because obviously, like,
I'm not making money right now,so I don't deserve any of this.
No, I found a solution, okay,and I kept moving, I decided and
I kept going, and this was wellbefore I even got into Enlifted
(04:37):
and practicing these storiesand looking at these stories
like we're talking about, I mean, the things that started
happening there.
Well, now we started sellinghigher ticket stuff in the gym
that people were impressed with.
I dropped the story of no, itdoesn't need to be that
expensive.
Guess what guys?
Some people enjoy buying Lexusesand Mercedes because they get
(05:00):
nice things and they have aprice tag that reflects their
investment.
Some people want to spend a lotof money on the things that
they like.
My wife bought an $800 redlight mask for her skin because
she likes nice things.
It's out there.
I mean, all y'all health nuts.
You're spending 12 to 15 bucksa pound on grass-fed and
(05:21):
finished beef.
I see you, you like nice things.
So why do?
We sometimes run stories, runnarratives, that say, no, it's,
people won't pay that for this.
Yes, they will.
People pay silly money forreally silly things, and we can
look at all the reasons thatsomething won't happen If we
(05:44):
want.
Guess what?
It'll never fucking happen, andwe will end up burning our
business to the ground becausewe don't believe that we're
worthy of it, because we don'tbelieve that we can go be fully
seen, and I mean, hey, maybe itwas that time that I pulled a
(06:07):
really dick move in middleschool and circulated papers
saying that my quad, my chorusteacher, was a there's a site
where you can make an articleabout a phantom pooper and I
used her name for it, and shewas so fucking hurt like I used
my own abilities to do theseperceive, perceivably funny
(06:31):
things right.
Um, as a kid, that hurt people.
I physically hurt people.
So some of the things that Ihave been able to move past as I
start looking at these reasonsthat I was holding myself back.
It was because, when I actuallyapplied myself, I was applying
in the wrong direction in thepast.
Now, though, since I startedshifting that and taking that
(06:55):
energy and applying it in a gooddirection, I mean a few of the
things.
My clients have called me aspiritual guide, a steward of
consciousness, the unsung heroof self-actualization, and three
of my clients have mentioned mein their book.
I love when my camera freezes.
For those of y'all that are onYouTube right now, riverside is
(07:18):
having trouble getting a signalfor my video, so it's blurry
right now.
There we're back, but if I hadshut up shop, those three books
that I mentioned in that allhappened in the last three years
.
Now, it's not about the factthat I'm in books.
(07:38):
What it is about is ifsomebody's life was impacted on
such a scale that it was worthputting my name and a story
about our interactions intotheir book, that ripple effect
never would have been created ifI had stopped Now.
(07:59):
Here's the tricky part here,guys, some of y'all might be
listening to this and you'relike you're right, chase, I'm
going to keep going.
I'm going to keep going, andthat'll last for about a fucking
week.
And then that narrative fromwhen you got hit by a ball and
T-ball and everybody laughed, soyou don't want to apply
yourself anymore.
Then that narrative from whenyou got hit by a ball and t-ball
and everybody laughed, so youdon't want to apply yourself
anymore.
Then that narrative from yourcoach, who was well-meaning but
(08:22):
operated like they were in the1960s, who used to just belittle
you for being the slowest onthe team, will come back and
tell you that you're not ascapable of everybody as
everybody else.
Then that narrative from yourparents' business failing and
entrepreneurship being hard willcome back.
Until we go in and veryspecifically unwire these
(08:44):
beliefs.
It's the thing Business is aninside game and it's personal
development on steroids.
And here's the funny part y'allA lot of you coaches know this.
Yet the content of mine that youconsume the most is three ways
to overcome DM objections.
(09:04):
Like, yeah, that's cool, andyou know what happens when we
lean into these stories andunwire them so that we can
actually become the person whoruns the business.
We know what we're selling, weknow the change that we affect.
So guess what happens?
I mean crazy idea.
(09:25):
Those DM conversations becomeautomatic.
You don't need this template orthis script.
You have the realizations ofwhat's going on, because these
people are your ideal clientsand you are inside their head,
because they are in a spot whereyou used to be Plain and simple
.
It's not the system, guys, itis the story.
(09:46):
That is such a beautiful freezeframe.
I'm going to enjoy watching theYouTube back.
Guys, if you're listening tothis on the audio form on the
podcast, go to YouTube and checkout some of these freeze frames
from when my video hasuncoupled for a second, I'll
leave you all with this.
A fair amount of you who followme know about the reticular
(10:10):
activating system, know aboutthe power of our words, yet you
don't have the business that yousay you want.
And I used to be in that samespot and I would give myself an
out by saying, well, happinessis created over here and this
and that, yeah, that's cool.
And if you still look at thattrip, that car, that giant
(10:36):
crystal, that singing bowl,those organic clothes, the $80
pop, one golden thread shirts,the grass fed and finished man,
it would be nice to be able toafford that, then you're lying
to yourself, plain and simple.
You are lying to yourself aboutwhat you, what you want, and
(11:01):
you are giving yourself an outby saying, oh well, that's just
my ego that wants those things.
Man, this might lose some ofy'all, but fuck it.
We are here, we incarnated in atheme park.
So stop trying to kill your egoand start reintegrating it into
your story and use it to deliveryour most raw, authentic,
(11:24):
powerful fucking magic, becausepeople need it.
And the more that you let thestories win that say, no, we can
play small, that reallyunderneath that story is.
I don't want to be fully seen.
I don't think I deserve thissuccess.
I am still operating from thatlittle kid who grew up without
(11:45):
money, and I think that's who Iam.
The more that you let thosestories win, the more that you
let your potential clients down,you let those stories win.
The more that you let yourpotential clients down, and I
know that anybody who made itthis far through this episode
that right there ought to beenough to start moving the
needle.
My question to you, though, iswhat the fuck are you going to
do about it?
the amount of times that I've been so incredibly
close to burning my businessesdown in the past, I mean, we
wouldn't be here today, guys.
And I see coaches every singleweek who, all of a sudden, I'll
check in on their stuff, andthat they, yeah, man, I'm going
to start with you next month,I'm just getting some stuff
(00:21):
together.
They haven't posted in a month,they're not doing it anymore,
and sometimes it's the rightcall.
More often, though, I know,because this has been happening
for a few years, I check in onthem a couple of years later.
How'd you do it?
(00:47):
How do you stay going?
And that's the thing, guys.
We look for these systems, welook for this organizational
toolkit, we look for thisdashboard, we look for the ad
strategy, and all of that isjust an add-on to the most
important piece, and that'srecognizing what levers are
being pulled when we are in ourbusiness.
I see individuals go throughnasty divorces, nasty breakups,
(01:09):
and then start blaming theirbusiness for their life, not to
mention, like, the choices theymade along the way, or maybe the
fact that the other person wasjust toxic, but because they're
now in this raw emotional state,they want to burn their
business to the ground that theyjust had a record fucking month
in Guys.
The victim mentality is anacquired personality trait where
(01:30):
we, the victim mentality is anacquired personality trait where
a person tends to regardthemselves as the victim of the
negative actions of others, evenin the absence of clear
evidence, and it depends on ahabitual thought process and
attributions, attributions.
Aka, if we have stories runningin our head that say, nope, I'm
(01:55):
not worthy of this business,nope, I'm not that person that
makes this money, then as westart to toe up against that
line, that edge of our identity,guess what is going to happen?
We're going to say things likenah, man, it took too much work
to get here.
No, I just I don't enjoy thisbusiness Really.
Like, maybe that's true andmaybe there's ways to fix that,
(02:20):
as opposed to saying, nope, Ineed to burn it down because I
believe that I don't deservethis level of income.
I don't believe that I am theperson who deserves to run a
business like this.
I don't believe that I am theperson who can go out and be
fully seen in my rawestexpression of me, fully
(02:45):
delivering my unique gifts tothe world.
I don't believe that.
So what am I going to do?
I'm not going to admit that, Idon't believe that, because that
would actually crack the dooropen into me shifting that
belief and having to step into anew paradigm.
So I'm just going to take thislittle, this piece of evidence
that I can find over here andI'm going to attribute it to my
shit can find over here and I'mgoing to attribute it to my shit
(03:06):
story around my business andI'm going to say, nope, business
just isn't for me, it's allsnake oil, it's all just like
once you see how the sausage ismade, it's all just sausage.
Guys, like the amount of peoplewho are waiting, who I'll back
this up If I had quit, if I hadfolded up shop before COVID,
(03:29):
there was a couple of roughmonths well before COVID where I
actually sat down with my dadand went to tears so, man, I
might have to sell my car, mychildhood car, the car I said
I'd never sell again, my Camaroto keep the gym afloat.
And we sat down, we had a longtalk and we found a way around
(03:50):
it and my landlord stretched onemonth of rent throughout the
end of the year.
And guess what, guys, westarted having record months in
the gym, like heading into COVID.
We had our best month ever, andit wasn't because I found some
new system, it was because Imoved through the story that was
(04:12):
saying, no, I don't, I don'tdeserve the gym, so that must
mean I don't deserve this careither, because obviously, like,
I'm not making money right now,so I don't deserve any of this.
No, I found a solution, okay,and I kept moving, I decided and
I kept going, and this was wellbefore I even got into Enlifted
(04:37):
and practicing these storiesand looking at these stories
like we're talking about, I mean, the things that started
happening there.
Well, now we started sellinghigher ticket stuff in the gym
that people were impressed with.
I dropped the story of no, itdoesn't need to be that
expensive.
Guess what guys?
Some people enjoy buying Lexusesand Mercedes because they get
(05:00):
nice things and they have aprice tag that reflects their
investment.
Some people want to spend a lotof money on the things that
they like.
My wife bought an $800 redlight mask for her skin because
she likes nice things.
It's out there.
I mean, all y'all health nuts.
You're spending 12 to 15 bucksa pound on grass-fed and
(05:21):
finished beef.
I see you, you like nice things.
So why do?
We sometimes run stories, runnarratives, that say, no, it's,
people won't pay that for this.
Yes, they will.
People pay silly money forreally silly things, and we can
look at all the reasons thatsomething won't happen If we
(05:44):
want.
Guess what?
It'll never fucking happen, andwe will end up burning our
business to the ground becausewe don't believe that we're
worthy of it, because we don'tbelieve that we can go be fully
seen, and I mean, hey, maybe itwas that time that I pulled a
(06:07):
really dick move in middleschool and circulated papers
saying that my quad, my chorusteacher, was a there's a site
where you can make an articleabout a phantom pooper and I
used her name for it, and shewas so fucking hurt like I used
my own abilities to do theseperceive, perceivably funny
(06:31):
things right.
Um, as a kid, that hurt people.
I physically hurt people.
So some of the things that Ihave been able to move past as I
start looking at these reasonsthat I was holding myself back.
It was because, when I actuallyapplied myself, I was applying
in the wrong direction in thepast.
Now, though, since I startedshifting that and taking that
(06:55):
energy and applying it in a gooddirection, I mean a few of the
things.
My clients have called me aspiritual guide, a steward of
consciousness, the unsung heroof self-actualization, and three
of my clients have mentioned mein their book.
I love when my camera freezes.
For those of y'all that are onYouTube right now, riverside is
(07:18):
having trouble getting a signalfor my video, so it's blurry
right now.
There we're back, but if I hadshut up shop, those three books
that I mentioned in that allhappened in the last three years
.
Now, it's not about the factthat I'm in books.
(07:38):
What it is about is ifsomebody's life was impacted on
such a scale that it was worthputting my name and a story
about our interactions intotheir book, that ripple effect
never would have been created ifI had stopped Now.
(07:59):
Here's the tricky part here,guys, some of y'all might be
listening to this and you'relike you're right, chase, I'm
going to keep going.
I'm going to keep going, andthat'll last for about a fucking
week.
And then that narrative fromwhen you got hit by a ball and
T-ball and everybody laughed, soyou don't want to apply
yourself anymore.
Then that narrative from whenyou got hit by a ball and t-ball
and everybody laughed, so youdon't want to apply yourself
anymore.
Then that narrative from yourcoach, who was well-meaning but
(08:22):
operated like they were in the1960s, who used to just belittle
you for being the slowest onthe team, will come back and
tell you that you're not ascapable of everybody as
everybody else.
Then that narrative from yourparents' business failing and
entrepreneurship being hard willcome back.
Until we go in and veryspecifically unwire these
(08:44):
beliefs.
It's the thing Business is aninside game and it's personal
development on steroids.
And here's the funny part y'allA lot of you coaches know this.
Yet the content of mine that youconsume the most is three ways
to overcome DM objections.
(09:04):
Like, yeah, that's cool, andyou know what happens when we
lean into these stories andunwire them so that we can
actually become the person whoruns the business.
We know what we're selling, weknow the change that we affect.
So guess what happens?
I mean crazy idea.
(09:25):
Those DM conversations becomeautomatic.
You don't need this template orthis script.
You have the realizations ofwhat's going on, because these
people are your ideal clientsand you are inside their head,
because they are in a spot whereyou used to be Plain and simple
.
It's not the system, guys, itis the story.
(09:46):
That is such a beautiful freezeframe.
I'm going to enjoy watching theYouTube back.
Guys, if you're listening tothis on the audio form on the
podcast, go to YouTube and checkout some of these freeze frames
from when my video hasuncoupled for a second, I'll
leave you all with this.
A fair amount of you who followme know about the reticular
(10:10):
activating system, know aboutthe power of our words, yet you
don't have the business that yousay you want.
And I used to be in that samespot and I would give myself an
out by saying, well, happinessis created over here and this
and that, yeah, that's cool.
And if you still look at thattrip, that car, that giant
(10:36):
crystal, that singing bowl,those organic clothes, the $80
pop, one golden thread shirts,the grass fed and finished man,
it would be nice to be able toafford that, then you're lying
to yourself, plain and simple.
You are lying to yourself aboutwhat you, what you want, and
(11:01):
you are giving yourself an outby saying, oh well, that's just
my ego that wants those things.
Man, this might lose some ofy'all, but fuck it.
We are here, we incarnated in atheme park.
So stop trying to kill your egoand start reintegrating it into
your story and use it to deliveryour most raw, authentic,
(11:24):
powerful fucking magic, becausepeople need it.
And the more that you let thestories win that say, no, we can
play small, that reallyunderneath that story is.
I don't want to be fully seen.
I don't think I deserve thissuccess.
I am still operating from thatlittle kid who grew up without
(11:45):
money, and I think that's who Iam.
The more that you let thosestories win, the more that you
let your potential clients down,you let those stories win.
The more that you let yourpotential clients down, and I
know that anybody who made itthis far through this episode
that right there ought to beenough to start moving the
needle.
My question to you, though, iswhat the fuck are you going to
do about it?
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