March 2, 2025 • 48 mins
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome back to Dead Mom Scavenger.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Hunt, I'm Christmas and I'm Cara and we're going to
talk about the first part of ourDead Mom Scavenger Hunt, alaska
recap.
Alaska yes, um, so there arebasically three legs in
geographically speaking, on thescavenger hunt that she left us.
(00:22):
However, we have taken it uponourselves to also add in things
that we know she wanted to doand isn't able to, things that
we think she would enjoy, thatwe're going to do together,
because she can't, and we'regoing to go do them for her.
Yep, alaska was straight fromthe horse's mouth.
You girls have to take anAlaskan cruise together.
(00:44):
Yep, mouth, you girls have totake an alaskan cruise together.
Yep, cara and I had both beenvehemently cruise, uh, adverse.
Yeah, we had both been on.
I had been on one before, I hadbeen on one also and I said
never again.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
I was like I was 20, wanted to go on a big family
cruise.
So we did that.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
It was lovely to be with the family.
They paid, they made us go.
It was great to get to spendtime with them, but I knew that
cruising was not for me not acruiser.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
What was it about that larger commercial type
cruise that you did not like?
I mean, I know what I didn'tlike but the food sucks.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
Even in the nicest restaurants it's all the same
food.
It comes out of the samekitchen.
It might be a nicer tableclothand it might be nicer flatware,
but most of the food is exactlythe same and it sucks.
The people it was just a bunchof people stuffing themselves at
a buffet.
Um, the pool it looked okaywhen we first got on the boat,
(02:01):
but you know, by day threethere's a nice film it looked
like a frat party had happened.
It looked like pond, like pondscum.
There was like a film oflotions and sunscreens.
Um, there were so many childrenand I have really created my
life such that I'm not aroundscreaming children at all.
(02:25):
Occasionally it happens, butthere were a lot of screamy kids
.
It's just not my scene.
I also, I, whenever I travel, Ilike to go to very non-touristy
, out of the way places.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
You, want an authentic experience.
I want an authentic experience.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
I want authentic food .
I want to give my money to theactual people who live in these
places.
I don't want all the um, quote,unquote.
Ports were basically just in aextension of the cruise ship.
They had the same shittychashkis and a different version
of the same trinkets and likeone of the stops.
(03:06):
In fact I couldn't.
I wanted to find it on a mapand I couldn't find it and I was
like what, why can't I evenfind this on a map?
This is so weird.
Come to find out.
It's actually just a man-madeisland owned by the cruise ship.
Oh my god that.
So you're just giving yourmoney back to the cruise ship.
It's not helping the countrythat you're visiting.
(03:27):
It's not putting money in theirlocal economy.
I think, instead of saying whatdid you like about it or what
didn't you like about it, maybea better question would be what
did you like about it?
Speaker 1 (03:43):
I was trying to establish a comparison like a
bar, Because the bar was so low.
I also had the same complaintswhen I was on the cruise that I
went on the big commercialcruise, yeah, but my biggest
issue was all the waiting aroundall the standing in line, a lot
of lines, yeah, like we stoodin line for lot of lines yeah,
(04:04):
although, like we stood in linefor hours to get on the boat and
then every time you wanted toget on and off the boat, off and
back on, you were in line againfor hours and hours and hours
and it was just fucking awful.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
So that alone made me not want to ever do a cruise
again sure so when bonnie saidto us, when she saddled us with
yes, well, and also also when myhusband and I are my friends
and I travel.
As you know, when we traveltogether, I like to have a very,
very loose, skeletal outlineLike this is where we're going
(04:37):
to sleep.
Maybe, if there's a greatrestaurant that I'm dying to try
, we might have a meal there,but I like to fly by the seat of
my pants and, as you and I say,see where the travel magic
leads us or where, which way thewinds blow us, because that's
where you have the bestexperience, the experience that
you could have never evenimagined.
(04:58):
But if you have this regimentedplan of we're going, we're
going to get on a bus and thenwe're going to go see this, you
know, preserve, and then we'regoing to get on a bus and then
we're going to go see this, youknow, preserve, and then we're
going to get back on.
But also, I hate buses.
I'm not getting on a bus whenyou get really carsick I get
terribly carsick and just Idon't want to feel like I'm
being cattled around.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
I don't think that's really a word, but you know what
I did herded yeah, and I don'twant to and I don't want to be
with a, but I don't want aspoon-fed whitewashed experience
yes, agreed, agreed.
So that's kind of why we wereinitially like, oh god, do we
have to do this?
Speaker 2 (05:35):
but she said yes, you have to do this, yeah so, but
she did not specify what kind ofboat, how big the boat, her
whole thing was.
There's just some beautifullandscapes that you can only see
by boat.
And she was not wrong, notwrong not wrong?
Speaker 1 (05:52):
no, absolutely not so .
So we set to work trying tofind a small outfit.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
A smallish outfit, I think you and I both googled
cruises for people who hatecruises.
Speaker 1 (06:02):
We did that was the first thing I cruised.
I didn't check, I didn't checkchat gpt, because I don't know
if that was even Well at thetime, chat GPT had just become
widely available to us as as uhthe general, to the general
public, and it did not have themore most recent information
online that it does now Gotcha.
So we were, we still had toGoogle things, and I mean, we
(06:23):
still Google things whatever.
It doesn't matter.
The point is we spent copiousamounts of time researching.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
So much research.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
Eventually, you asked some friends of yours who had
been on a smallish it's like amicro luxury cruise.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
Basically it is.
Yeah, there's only 600 peopleon the boat as opposed to 3000,
plus Good God, and it might'veeven been less.
It might have been like four orfive hundred.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
I mean, I know the boat holds that many.
I think part most of thosepeople.
Well, like half Wait is sixhundred.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
Does that include staff?
Speaker 1 (06:52):
OK, so then it's like four hundred guests.
Yeah, maybe four hundred guests.
Four hundred guests, which isnot that many for a cruise.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Two hundred staff, no because there was like one
staff member for every twopeople.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
That sounds right.
If we're wrong, somebodycorrect us or whatever.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Seaborn, feel free to correct us, but we're singing
your praises, so maybe don't.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Or whatever.
Yeah, so we decided on Seaborn,we booked it.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
Yes, and I had friends who had been, and this
circles back to just what Ithink should be really just
advice you should always take inlife.
Ask the gays Lovely gay couplefriends of mine were like we did
a seaborne one and we loved itand I was like I trust them and
(07:32):
I trust their judgment.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
They have impeccable taste.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
They like good food.
They're not going to be herdedaround like show ponies.
Um, and so we landed onseaborne, because it also left
from vancouver and we knew wehad to go to vancouver because
that was on the list.
Yep, from bonnie.
Yeah, um, and it ticked theboxes so we flew out.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
We ended up here, so here was our itinerary for
alaska.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
We flew out on um the 24th which was the day she died
, one year later yep, we met upin the morning in Seattle.
Very teary.
Welcome, welcome.
We looked like lovers runningtowards each other in an embrace
.
You've seen it in the movies,you know.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
We both are notorious overpackers, oh my God.
And you also like to buysweatshirts wherever you go, so
we needed extra luggage forKara's sweatshirts.
Speaker 1 (08:25):
I typically don't buy sweatshirts.
I typically don't even.
I almost never pack a bag likeor check a bag.
I never check a bag, I onlycarry on.
But for this trip we decided weneeded space so we each checked
a bag or two yeah, and you werein charge of the rental car,
okay.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
Okay, to be fair, what you requested was a small
SUV.
I did.
I requested a small SUV.
We just wanted to make sure wehad room for the luggage and we
were going to be doing a littlebit of road tripping, in that we
were driving from Seattle toCanada.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
So we flew into Seattle.
We were spending one night inSeattle and doing all the things
in Seattle Basically a day anda half in Seattle and then we
were going to drive up throughBellingham, spend the afternoon
in Bellingham and then carry oninto Vancouver and spend another
night in Vancouver and then geton the ship the next day, which
is what we did, Correct.
So we got to the airport inSeattle and tearful hello
(09:22):
reunion.
Then we went to look for ourrental car.
This was the first.
This is where the travel magicbegan, because we could not find
no where we were supposed toget this rental.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
In hindsight, I should have read the email with
the instructions in it well,part of this, part of the
challenge was that we werepicking up the car in one
country and dropping it off inanother country.
Yes, so this is not just aregular like Hertz Avis
Enterprise.
Yeah, that adds a degree ofdifficulty.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
Yeah, so I did use a transport company that I was not
familiar with and it did nothave a central hub in the
airport.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
So we ended up, but the reason we chose it was
because we could just drop itoff at the hotel we were staying
at in Vancouver.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
It appeared that that was the case.
Yes, it actually was the case,we just fucked it up.
We'll get there.
Okay, let's not get ahead ofourselves.
First we had to find this SUV.
You can't see me If you're notin our Patreon.
You can't see me making quotesKara's making air quotes.
Air quotes.
Quote SUV, Small SUV.
So we finally found the shuttleto take us to this lot that was
(10:28):
far away from the airport.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
It was a 10 minute drive from the airport.
It was not walkable.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
No.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Put it that way, especially not with our big ass
suitcases.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
With all of our.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
The Couture Malls.
Speaker 1 (10:38):
Yeah, All of our stuff.
We have a picture that'sprobably we'll put it.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
We were really good about documenting this on
Instagram, all different phasesof it, and I will put those on
our Instagram page.
I will put them, though, asInstagram highlights.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
Probably like Alaska 1, Alaska 2, Alaska 3, because
there are 500 plus.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
Yeah, we'll go alaska one through five, um, so you'll
, you'll start with one as hisgreat advice for life.
Yeah, um, but look in thehighlights, because it won't
just be on our regular feed,because it would take up our
regular feed for months at atime yeah, so we documented this
whole thing and it was funnybecause my family was like, oh,
like they were so annoyed that Ikept like sharing all these.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
There was a lot of updates, right, but some people
really loved it.
Oh my gosh, no one was annoyed.
Speaker 2 (11:30):
People, people I didn't even know were texting or
not, however, you like, dmingme through Instagram and being
like this is so funny.
I wake up every morning and,like every day, I just want to
see what you guys are doing, andevery day, I want to see what
ridiculousness is happening, andevery day, I want to see where,
where you're at and what whoyou're meeting and what
experiences you're happening,you're happening, you're
(11:53):
happening, you're happening.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
So we get to this lot and we get off the bus and
we're we're looking for.
I had a picture of the parkingspace number the parking space
number.
The parking space number, but Idon't think it said what kind
of vehicle it was.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
It did not say what kind of vehicle it was.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
And so I was looking for the.
We thought we found the parkinglot number.
It was a little bit like fadedin the concrete.
So the bus takes off and we'restanding there with all of our
luggage and it's this ChevySilverado truck, and I get on
the app that they had asked usto download and I'm having to
(12:27):
take pictures of all of this,this truck, so that they can see
the condition it's in before wetake it, and whatever.
And the keys are supposed to bein it.
Yeah, the keys are supposed tobe in it.
Um, the code that they gave usdid not work.
We could not get into thistruck.
That is because it was thewrong space, at which point we
realized we were in the wrongplace and it was the right
number.
It was like g21 and we were upin t21 or something like that we
were, but we were in the wronglot, yeah, so we had to flag
down another bus, get back on abus, go to this other lot.
(12:51):
We eventually did find it andwe pull up to the lot, the, the
space number, and they're likehere's your vehicle and it's a
14 passenger.
Sprinter van it is a giantsprinter van giant sprinter van
now.
You love.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
You drive everywhere we go, because you get car sick
yes I would have been finedriving the sprinter van oh, I
was so excited to drive this badboy.
I have a transit van at home.
Speaker 1 (13:13):
Yes, you do.
It's basically the same thing.
It's not a tall one, it's amedium roof, but it still is.
You know, it's basically thesame thing.
I would have been okay.
This thing could have easilyheld 20 people.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
I'm surprised they didn't have a special class
license to drive it.
I think it had 14 seatbelts.
Okay, 12 or 14 seats.
Speaker 1 (13:30):
It was a lot.
It was like the biggest onethey make and it was, you know,
big black transit van with allthe blacked out windows.
Oh yeah, I love a big black van, and so we're All right, we're
so overcome with the magnitude.
I think glee is what I wasovercome with.
I was just fucking shocked.
So we get in, we unlock it,we're putting our shit away and
(13:52):
Christmas says wait, where's mybag?
Speaker 2 (13:56):
She's missing a bag, one of my little bags.
Yeah, I had to sprint from thesprinter to the now driving away
bus, yelling wait, do you have?
Speaker 1 (14:05):
a bag and we're going to another country when I bus
yelling wait, do you have a?
Speaker 2 (14:10):
and we're going to another country I've never seen
a woman run so frantically ohdude, flojo got nothing on this
girl when she's missing a bag.
I was in the bag.
Uh, what was in the bag?
It was the tiny bag.
What was it?
Was it like bathroom stuff?
Like personal?
It was bathroom stuff because Ididn't want to have to get into
the big bag until we got on theboat and we were going to be in
seattle and vancouver for twonights, so it was just what I
(14:31):
need for those two nights,clothing wise, but also
toothbrush, toothpaste, yeah,all the stuff you really kind of
want.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
Sleep mask drugs, drugs important things yeah so
she kicks off running after thisvan trying to trying to tackle
this guy to the ground.
Get him to stop this van beforehe leaves the lot to go pick up
more crazy did you see meactually catch it or did you not
know I caught it?
You were you were kind ofaround a billboard.
I couldn't see you when youcaught him until I emerged, I
(14:59):
didn't know you caught him untilyou started walking back with
your.
I emerged victorious, so thatwas I.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
I felt like I was running, you know, walking up
like I feel it coming in the air.
I break the rules.
I know I had brianna vibes, soI was ready to run this town,
and then we were ready to go.
Um, yep, we were ready to goand we were.
I'm very familiar with downtownSeattle.
I love Seattle, I go thereregularly, have spent a good
(15:33):
amount of time there, so I knewwhere we were going and I was
thrilled to.
For those of you in the Patreonwho are seeing the video of
this, I'm just getting to thepictures because I don't want to
forget anything pertinent.
Yeah, I'm looking in mypictures too.
That's what we're looking atand we get off on the exit that
we need to take for downtownSeattle and the our hotel, which
is a hotel that I love.
(15:54):
Cheers to the Inn at the Market, big fan Tip of the hat.
We get off on the exit andwe're driving, you know, down
the street and Kara's like well,I, I mean at least we're the
biggest thing on the road.
At that precise moment, a giantand I mean giant tractor
(16:15):
trailer, john Deere tractorpulls up right next to us on a
main thoroughfare as if to sayyeah like what the fuck?
as if to say oh, you think youare the biggest thing on the
road and you are not.
Yeah, um, there will bepictures on the uh instagram as
well as video.
Yeah, so that's fun.
Um, so we go to check in to thehotel and ditch the car, and at
(16:42):
which point we discover there'snowhere to park.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
They have covered parking and we cannot park under
any circumstances they do nothave a lot.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
You, you have to valet, you must valet, and they
say we can't fit your big bitchhere.
Speaker 1 (16:57):
Yeah, and so we're like well, where do you suggest
we park?
We're just parked on the sideof the street at this point
talking to someone, we're parkedat the valet where they like.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Take your back to the valet and he's like I.
I can't take this.
Yeah, they were I mean they feltbad about it, but they were
like, uh, I don't know.
Well, one guy was like I don'tknow, let me ask my fellow valet
, homie.
And that guy says, well,there's another hotel, two
blocks down, one block up, thathas a few spaces that are not
(17:27):
covered and they might be ableto take it.
So we gave them all our bagsand, with hope and a prayer in
our hearts, we drove to theother hotel and said we will pay
you whatever you want to keepthis for one night, yeah.
And they said that'll be $80.
Is that what it was?
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:45):
Okay, and I said and they said that'll be $80.
Speaker 2 (17:48):
Is that what it was?
Yeah, and I said I'm reallyhappy to pay that.
Thank you very much You'redoing good work here Great work
here yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
So they did take our van and we walked the two blocks
, three blocks, back to thehotel that we were staying at.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Yeah, when our bags already were, which they were
still there.
They were excellent.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
They were great got checked into our room and then,
um, I think we, then we went tolunch.
We, uh, at that point we werelike, can we just get a beer and
some french fries please?
So we walked down to a placewhere also we could oversee the
sound.
Um, we got a great view at pikeplace, had some french fries,
did a beer sampling oh that'sright, which was delicious.
Speaker 1 (18:31):
I don't remember what it was called, but it was.
Speaker 2 (18:33):
I don't remember what that place was called right
either oh it was called.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
Oh, it was old stove beer, oh, old stove brewery.
Speaker 2 (18:41):
Old stove brewery.
Yeah, great view right by PikePlace, um, great view of the Big
Wheel, which was one of thethings that was absolutely on
mom's list.
Old Stove Brewing Company.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
There you go.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
Old Stove Brewing Company.
We had oh God, we had thosewarm pretzels with the cheese
sauce, those like little pretzelbites.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
God, I love a warm pretzel which you needed, the
carbs after running after thattrolley.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
Yeah, yeah yeah, yeah .
Speaker 1 (19:08):
So we had a snack.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
We had a snack and then, oh, because we were
waiting for matt's at the marketto open, because we were going
to get lunch there yes.
So then we walked to matt's atthe market, which was also
another thing that was on mom'slist.
Yep, the big wheel matt's atthe market.
So so far we've only hit thebig wheel mats at the market.
(19:30):
So so far we've only hit.
We go to mats at the market.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
We had this salad that I made 30 times after I got
home I made it once after wegot home and I did not nail it
and I will not try to make itagain, I will make it for you,
okay.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
Um, not right now because melon's not in season,
right, but it was a salad thatwas honey and and I know melon
can be polarizing for people,but trust me when I tell you
this was fucking so good.
Honeydew Cantaloupe, did ithave watermelon too?
Speaker 1 (19:57):
I think it had watermelon too.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
Okay so three kinds of melon, mint, mint A, so
delightfully salty but likecrispy on the outside, grilled
halloumi cheese.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
I had never had halloumi cheese before, so that
was new to me, uh.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
Marcona almonds and a honey mustard dressing with
champagne vinegar.
It was so I called them to getthe recipe for the dressing.
Yeah, it was so good.
I think about that salad a lot.
Yeah, um, had had that.
And at that point I told karait was time to go on the big
(20:34):
wheel.
If you don't know what the bigwheel is in seattle, it is a
permanent structure, giantferris wheel.
So, and you the, the, the seats, it's what would you call those
?
The capsule Cage, the cage youare in.
They're all glass so you'reenclosed.
But you go so high it would beso windy up there, so you have
(20:55):
to be enclosed in glass.
But the views are incredible.
You're right over the PugetSound.
As our mom used to say, themajesty of the Puget Sound.
There's nothing more beautifulthan the majesty of the Puget
Sound.
Speaker 1 (21:08):
I was not.
This was not a highlight of thetrip I was looking forward to.
No, she were kind of dreadingit.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
So I, when I got pregnant with Parker, I
developed out of nowhere, adebilitating fear of heights,
which is so funny.
I'm not the only person thatthis has happened to.
Do you think it's becauseyou're like now I have someone I
have to be around for I thinkit's evolutionary.
I think it's evolutionary.
Yeah, this is someanthropomorphic shit.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
Yeah, because I used to mountain bike in the canyon
in the area where we live andthere's lots of like drop offs
and things.
And mountain lions Well, yeah,but that doesn't matter.
I mean, it matters, but that'snot relevant to the.
Never even thought aboutfalling off the cliff and dying.
It never even occurred to methat that was a problem.
(21:49):
Or an option you had I didn'teven notice the cliff right
After Parker.
That was all I could thinkabout was the sheer edge that I
was going to die off of, and Isuddenly had this like visceral
fear of heights.
That was just out of nowhere.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Because?
Was it because A you didn'twant to die and not see him grow
up, or because you were like Ican't leave him because then
jeremy's a single dad?
Probably both, okay never.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
It wasn't like a conscious thing, it was very
subconscious, visceral.
I don't.
I'm assuming that's what it was, because the older he got he's
18 now the older he got, theless intense it was interesting.
Speaker 2 (22:21):
I don't have children , which is well documented, so
we were curious how this whole,and I'm genuinely curious about
these not that I want kids,because no no, thank you, but I
am curious about you know,because I love you and I love
parker and I love jeremy, I'mcurious about what the actual
feelings were.
Speaker 1 (22:37):
I'm not trying to like no, no, I'm shitty about it
.
No, I didn't think you were.
It was a very interestingphenomena, yeah, that I
experienced, because, um, and Iwas like, no, I don't do heights
, like I don't want to go onthis ferris wheel because I'm
afraid of heights, but I wascurious because we number one,
we had to do it well, and also Itold you that mom was afraid of
heights too.
Speaker 2 (22:57):
Yeah, which she was, and when she and I, I made her
go on the big wheel the firsttime, she went on it and it goes
around thrice and I did know Ihad noted that the fear of
heights was abating slightlyokay over time.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
So I figured we'd we'd just, we're gonna see what
happens.
Yeah, how I feel if I freak out, let me off this fucking thing.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
We didn't know, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (23:17):
This was the first heights experiment we had well
also.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
They have now very smartly changed it so that you
can.
It used to be if you wanted tobring alcohol on the big wheel,
you, you had to sneak it,smuggle it, you had to smuggle
it.
Now they were like, oh, here'san extra revenue stream and
people are doing this anyway.
We stood in line and bought ourwine sippy cups.
Yeah, we had wine sippy cupsthat we took on the big wheel.
(23:41):
It goes around thrice.
When mom and I went on it thefirst time it went up, she was
like, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck,oh fuck, oh fuck.
The second time she was likeokay, I'm feeling a little
better.
Oh, that's kind of pretty.
This is kind of a cool view.
The third time around she waslike, oh my God, this view is
fucking incredible.
This is the greatest thing ofall time.
(24:01):
And then she wanted to go on itagain.
So the feeling.
Speaker 1 (24:08):
So I had a feeling that was kind of what was going
to happen with you, but againdidn't know, Also didn't want to
find out.
And what happened?
It didn't even register that wewere off the ground to me.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
I had no, but how dope were those views.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
It was gorgeous, I mean if you go to Seattle.
I know it sounds cheesy, butget a sippy cup of wine and get
on that Ferris wheel.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
Get on that big wheel .
Speaker 1 (24:30):
Get your sipping cup.
And it was just majestic.
It was majestic as fuck, yeah,so we did the ferris wheel.
It was a success.
Check off the list.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
We were doing so good , we had so many we're doing so
good okay.
So after that we took somepictures.
Where did we go to dinner?
Oh, zigzag.
We went to zigzag.
I love zigzag um.
Big fans of zigzag cafe.
Um, the staff there isincredible, they're lovely.
(24:54):
The owner's great.
It was amazing, cool vibes um,and we had had a pretty big and
emotional day at that point.
Speaker 1 (25:01):
So I yeah, by that point, what was it I was?
I was smoked and, as you know,I don't do well in loud, dark
places late at night.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
Yeah, kara um kara handled sensory issues yeah,
carol kara handles crowds andsensory issues much differently
than I do, which is to say thatI don't.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
If I don't, I try not to handle them at all yeah, um,
um.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
So we we got to the hotel and found that not only
did we have the exact same sleepmask, we both had the same
readers, because now that's athing, the reason that we had
the same sleep mask, because Iasked you oh, did you?
I ordered the one that you toldme to order, that's why Okay.
Speaker 1 (25:41):
Um, but yeah, my my glasses, I don't wear readers.
Well, I do now, but I didn'tthen.
Um, I my glasses, I don't wearreaders well I do now, but I
didn't then.
Um, I my glasses matched yourreaders when I put yeah, I took
my contacts out, my glasses andyour glasses were like I don't
even need readers and they'renot prescription and in fact
they look so cute on you though,oh thanks.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Um, I went to the eye doctor because I was sure I was
like I must need readersbecause I bought, surely, surely
, well, and I bought a pair.
That was just a level one and Iput them on and I was like holy
shit, I did not know this bookcould be this clear.
I have superhuman sight.
Now I can read anything.
I just look at me, look at me.
I was, it was just.
(26:18):
It was like those stupid oldblue blockers.
Commercials like these new blueblockers are great.
Everything's so much sharperand clearer.
But I felt like that.
So I ever since then, when Iread a book at night and I'm one
of those people that alwaysreads at night my level one
readers are great, and Iactually tried level like 1.25
(26:39):
or 1.5, and it was too much justto just a gentle little one.
So we had the same readers andsleep mask and looked like big
fucking nerds.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure youposted that picture too.
There's so many pictures.
Um spent the night.
Luckily, cara and I are bothearly birds in the morning time,
thank god, um, we got up, wewent and had at one of my
(27:01):
favorite bakeries a ham andcheese croissant.
That's so good it will make youcry.
Is this where we fess upbecause your husband's never
gonna listen to this, or do we?
Speaker 1 (27:10):
not he makes it to this episode, I would be shocked
kara's husband is a vegetarianand he feels very passionate
about it which I get.
Speaker 2 (27:19):
We have been to therapy over a chicken salad
sandwich yes, he, um, he feelsvery strongly about it, so kara
does not eat the agreement thecontract in my home.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Okay, great Is that we don't cook meats at home.
I mean other than Parker eatingsteak and things like that, but
we don't cook chicken at home.
Speaker 2 (27:39):
Well, and you don't cook meat for yourself at home.
Speaker 1 (27:41):
Right when I am at home with my husband and my
family.
He and I are vegetarian.
Speaker 2 (27:47):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Out in the world.
I am an independent contractor,yes, and I can do what I want.
Yes, it would hurt his heart tosee me eat ham.
Speaker 2 (27:57):
So it made my heart very happy, because you should
have seen the look on her facewhen she bought in or brought
bought bit bit, bought bit bit.
I bought.
When she bought, you boughtinto it and you bit into it.
When she bit into this ham andcheese croissant, which also has
just a little bit of a Bernaysin it, the look on her face it
(28:19):
was what was the name of thebakery?
I think it's just La Blu,lingerie or something like that.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
It wasn't really.
Oh no, that's not.
Speaker 2 (28:26):
I have a tote bag from there in the other room,
but I'm not going to get up andget it.
Speaker 1 (28:30):
Hold on, I'll find it .
We'll link it in the show notes, don't?
Speaker 2 (28:31):
worry about it.
It's at Pike Place.
It's like the main Frenchbakery there.
It's literally kitty cornerfrom the end of the market.
You can see it from there.
It was a great coffee, greattea and those croissants, man.
Um, we walked through pikeplace, we looked at beautiful
(28:53):
flowers, we saw all thewonderful farm standee markets
and, oh god, seafood and big assshrimp and medium ass shrimp.
Um, and then we decided we hadto kind of get going because we
had places to go and we had tomake it to Vancouver.
We had to book it.
We had to book it to Bellinghambecause we were planning on
(29:14):
spending some time in Bellingham, which is mom's hometown.
Oh, I almost said shout out,big ups to Bellingham.
What's the punishment forsaying shout out?
You get to slap me.
Speaker 1 (29:24):
No, I don't want to slap you you can punch me in the
arm.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
Oh, to slap me?
No, I don't want to slap you.
You can punch me in the arm.
Oh, that was a pathetic punch,wasn't it God?
You punched like a puss.
Go ahead, that's better.
I know I can do better thanthat.
That was better.
And we wanted to spend sometime in downtown Bellingham.
We had two addresses of housesthat she lived in when she was
little.
Speaker 1 (29:41):
One was an actual oh wait wait, don't get a two ahead
of made a.
We made a big discovery on theway to bellingham, do you tell?
We discovered that I am theshittiest videographer.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
Oh my god, okay, since I was driving, I was like
carrie, you have to takepictures for the gram of like
street signs.
It was a simple assignment.
Cara might be the worstphotographer slash photo
documentarian of anyone I haveever met in my life, and she's a
very bright woman with lots ofdifferent skill sets.
(30:15):
This is not one of them.
I don't you couldn't even tryto get it that bad.
No, I couldn't be worse if Itried.
If you go to the gram, you willget to see some of her work.
She is very it turns out verygood at taking pictures of one
thing and one thing only, andthat is Ford Rangers Ford.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
Rangers.
I am pretty good at capturingthe Ford Rangers For some reason
in so many pictures.
Speaker 2 (30:40):
There's just one random, crystal and clear Ford
fucking Ranger.
And every other picture isblurry, it's just raindrops,
it's your feet, it's the centerconsole, it's just your hand
covering it.
Look, man.
Speaker 1 (30:58):
We can't all be good at all the things it's true,
it's very true and, like I said,you have many other amazing
skills that I'm so grateful for.
I was not gifted in this area,no no.
I am all you had at this moment.
So we have.
You're often all I have we havecorners of signs that we were
trying to capture and thingslike that.
So we were trying to capture,like the picture of the
(31:18):
Bellingham Welcome to, pictureof the bellingham welcome to
bellingham side, and it's likeraindrops on the windshield, not
even in focus and no, it'sterrible.
There's some great video of melip syncing and this continued.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
This was a trend that continued throughout the trip,
but we did.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
Oh, it continues to this day we did eventually make
it to bellingham which is one ofthe cutest towns of all time.
Yeah, we had a really cute.
So what did we?
Where did we go?
First in Bellingham.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
First did we get snacks, first Did we go to the
taco place.
Speaker 1 (31:49):
No, we went to her house first.
Speaker 2 (31:51):
We did.
Speaker 1 (31:51):
Yeah, it looks like according to my calculations, we
went to the houses.
Oh, here's a Ford Rangerpicture.
We took some pictures, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:57):
Okay, we took pictures, oh, yeah.
So we went to the two placesthat she grew up.
One of them is so cute and hadlike 27 hummingbird feeders.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
Yeah, it was adorable .
And, like Mardi Gras beads, westopped and took a picture of
Queen Anne's lace.
Her favorite flower Growing upthrough the concrete, because
that was her favorite flower,which a lot of people think it's
a weed.
Speaker 2 (32:15):
I mean, I guess it technically is a weed.
Yeah, I guess, but it grows.
It's really, it's in the eye ofthe beholder, it's true.
And then, oh, we went and sawBellingham High, yep, her high
school, home of the fighting.
What are pine trees?
No Osprey.
Speaker 1 (32:36):
No, what are they?
Speaker 2 (32:37):
What's Bellingham High School?
Speaker 1 (32:38):
I have no idea.
Somebody tell us.
Speaker 2 (32:40):
Home of the wild cats .
No that sounds right, actuallydoes it well, it might be wild
cats, it might not.
Um, um, yeah, we don't know.
Speaker 1 (32:51):
We don't know.
Speaker 2 (32:52):
Somebody tell us it's probably right in and tell I'm
gonna guess it's not the pinetrees or the osprey home of the
fighting hiking boots.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
We did look this up on the the trip because they
have changed it since it wasdifferent.
It was home of something whenshe was there.
It is not the same now.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
Well, no, it's a bigger high school, but they
didn't change the mascot, didthey?
Yeah, oh, for politicallycorrect reasons.
What is Bellingham?
Speaker 1 (33:15):
High's mascot.
Speaker 2 (33:19):
Sorry, it is home of the Bay Hawks, okay, okay, big
red is it was previously the redraiders, remember?
Speaker 1 (33:30):
okay, it was changed to a bird of prey when the
school reopened in 2000 after atwo-year closure.
Speaker 2 (33:35):
So okay okay, problem , the fighting mystery solve.
See wait, see bay hawagles, bayhawks my god, my god seagulls,
sea eagles, the bay hawks um,okay anyways, then we went into
downtown bellingham, which isadorable, which is adorable.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
I had parked the van like a fucking rock star you did
really poorly, really poorly,on every parking assignment with
that big ass thing it was, wasit wasn't good, it wasn't great
we all have our weaknesses.
Thank you, and I love youanyway.
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
Luckily I had you to guide me in air traffic control
style on a few of them.
Yeah, left to my own devices.
I would have parked at an anglewith the ass end of the van
four feet from the curb.
Speaker 1 (34:21):
I think we posted a picture on Instagram of this guy
that we saw with a cat on hisshoulder.
Speaker 2 (34:26):
Oh yeah, like a parrot just perched down.
Yeah, just walking down thestreet.
Speaker 1 (34:29):
Not a parrot, but a cat, that's when we went to the
Mexican food place and got likemargaritas or something.
We got margaritas and guacamole.
Speaker 2 (34:36):
And then we walked to a distillery that I wanted to
check out, but before we got tothe distillery Next door, to the
distillery.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
Yes, we got waylaid.
Speaker 2 (34:46):
We got so waylaid by a doggy Rescue.
Speaker 1 (34:53):
I mean, what do you even call this Like?
Well, it's like they have those, those cat cafes.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
It was like a puppy rescue, yeah, and you could go
in, you could go in and look atthe puppies and look at the
puppies playing or play with thepuppies.
You could pay a small fee andgo inside the gates and play
with the puppies.
And my favorite smell on theplanet puppy paws, puppy breath
oh, I like puppy paws.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
Oh, there's like corn chips popcorn oh, I okay.
Speaker 2 (35:19):
Yeah, they smell like malolactic fermentation.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
I live in the wine country.
Give me the puppies oh puppybreath.
Speaker 2 (35:27):
There was one that I was very close to trying to
figure out.
Didn't you call Hammer and say,hey, this puppy home, but not
(35:47):
for a week?
Also, it's a Mastiff pit bullmix and it's the cutest thing
I've ever seen.
He didn't go for it.
We have a beautiful, sweetlittle rescue pit bull already.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
If you're in the Patreon.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
You can see her.
She's sleeping right behind us.
Then we went to the distilleryChill no, what's it called Chill
Cook?
Speaker 1 (36:10):
No, that was in Alaska.
Speaker 2 (36:12):
It is called, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
I have pictures of us at the bar, but I don't
remember what it was called.
Did you buy some hot sauce fromthere.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
I did because I have a friend who lives in seattle um
big snaps to funky's hot sauce.
If you are in oh sorry, helives in bellingham.
Actually, if you're in thebellingham area um funky's hot
sauce, he makes lots of them.
They're very, very good.
Yeah, what was the name of thatdistillery?
I feel like it started with a c.
I think the bar was called thepenny farthing.
The bar at the penny farthingit was yeah that's the name of
the bar that's connected to it.
(36:50):
Yeah, um, penny farthingfunky's hot sauce.
Speaker 1 (36:55):
We got out of there and made our way to the border
yep, so we drove the rest of theway up to the border, and if
you've ever crossed the Canadianborder, you will know that well
.
If you've ever crossed theCanadian border with any degree
of regularity which we used todo when I was a kid all the time
, you will know that it is atotal crapshoot.
(37:16):
As to which type of borderagent you're going to get, yeah,
yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Yeah, yeah of border agent you're gonna get.
Speaker 1 (37:24):
Yeah, yeah, yeah could be a friendly person who's
like I feel like I've gottenlucky and really only had
friendly ones.
Uh, yeah, so my grandma iriswas really lucky in that way.
She would always tease them andlike flirt with the young men
and always be like like shecould have smuggled anything
across the border I cannotpicture your grandma iris
flirting with anyone she wouldalways wink at him and be like
how you doing honey, like shewas so funny with the border
patrol agents.
Speaker 2 (37:44):
I'm going to be like that when I'm old.
Speaker 1 (37:48):
Jeremy, when he crossed the border after a
mountain biking trip, he gotthis border control agent.
He was coming back into the USand this guy was like are you
bringing back any alcohol orfruits or vegetables or anything
like that?
And they're like I think wehave a few beers back there, but
otherwise no, or fruits orvegetables or anything like that
.
And they're like I think wehave a few beers back there, but
otherwise no, and he was likehow many beers Jesus Christ?
Like real aggressive and thiswas a US agent.
Speaker 2 (38:08):
right, yeah, that tracks.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
That tracks yeah, we're not real proud of where
we're at right now as a country,but that's another episode.
Speaker 2 (38:14):
And our Canadian brethren are known for being
polite.
Yeah, yeah, they're.
I mean, I'm canadian.
Yeah, kara is my mom's.
Kara has dual citizenship andI've never been more jealous.
My nana dropped the ball andrelink or like, let hers lapse,
and then didn't get it from mymom.
So I do not have canadiancitizenship.
I wish I did.
If there's any citizenshiplawyers out there who would like
(38:37):
to contact me about where wasyour nana born?
Uh, nana, she would have to getit because I think she was.
I think she was born in the us.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
Okay, then it wouldn't apply to you anyway.
Speaker 2 (38:50):
It was only ever two generations of descent, okay, so
her mom could have gotten it,but she you couldn't okay, but I
think there are some loopholes,if there's any canadian
citizenship lawyers who know ofa way that I could get it or buy
it, well, you can?
Speaker 1 (39:08):
I've read.
Speaker 2 (39:09):
Anyway, okay, we're getting way off track.
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
Speaker 1 (39:11):
This is going to be a long episode anyway, because
we're hovering the trip, right.
Speaker 2 (39:14):
Yeah, it might be a two-parter.
We don't know, we might have tobreak it up.
Speaker 1 (39:16):
We'll let you know, we'll.
Crossed through.
The guy was giving him a hardtime and he was like pull over,
let me look in your van.
How many beers, how many beersthey're like I don't know, like
five or ten or whatever.
And they're like, ah, pull over.
And he did go through all theirstuff and he found a bell
pepper, like a single bellpepper that what color was it?
Speaker 2 (39:32):
I think it was a red bell pepper.
Okay, well, if it was green,they should be arrested.
Speaker 1 (39:35):
They had forgotten it was in there in the cooler, and
they're like oh yeah, sorry, weforgot about that and he was,
he held it up and he's like I'mtaking this, oh and they're like
okay, we ran into a bad, like akind of a dick when we crossed
over on a whistler trip bellpeppers several years ago
because we went to kind of anout of the way one of the
(39:55):
stations that was kind of well,the crossing was kind of out of
the way because it was.
My mom said it would be like noline that time of day and the
guy was like why are youcrossing through here?
What?
Why didn't you go throughBlaine Like he was also?
yeah, and we were like I don'tknow.
My mom said to go through hereand it ended up being fine, so
we didn't know where we were,what we were going to get at the
at the border.
(40:16):
But we like spoiler alert wedid get through, but but she was
very suspicious as to why wewere driving a giant cargo van
with two people in it, with onlytwo people.
She was like so why are youdriving?
Literally just asked usstraight out why are you driving
a giant cargo van?
Speaker 2 (40:33):
we said you know what we?
Had the same goddamn question.
We would also love to know theanswer to that.
Yes, we tried to get a compactsuv, yeah, so we looked and we
ended up with this Also on myflight.
There was a group of maybe 14young Mormon boys that's right
Heading out on on their mission.
(40:54):
Um, I got to wonder if maybethose 14 had to maybe squeeze
into a compact SUV it was meantfor us while we rolled out in
their sprinter.
Speaker 1 (41:06):
Yeah, so we did get through the border and we headed
into Vancouver With one veryimportant stop we had to drop
the van off.
Speaker 2 (41:15):
No, before that.
Oh, we had to stop and getketchup chips.
We had to stop and get all thedelightful Canadian snacks, and
all dressed chips, all dressedchips, and the violet crumble
yes, all the.
Canadian treats.
All the Canadian snacks, snacksall dressed, all dressed,
violet crumble.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
Yes, all the canadian treats, all the canadian snacks
.
My god, I love ketchup.
So good, all dressed, all of it.
So we got all our trash snacks,trash snacks, and then we
hightailed it over to the hotel,as do you want me to make you a
cheese?
Cracker.
Uh, sure, okay, I think westayed at the pan pacific we did
stay at the pan pacific um, andwe needed to drop off the van
(41:50):
the van the.
Speaker 2 (41:53):
Thank you, I'll let you take over while I eat my um,
we had to drop off the van and,as we said before, the part of
the reason we rented this van isbecause it would be so easy to
just drop it off at the panpacific.
And we pull up to the panpacific and we're like so where
do we drop it off?
Speaker 1 (42:11):
it might have been the fairmont, was it?
Speaker 2 (42:14):
either way, it was right there, right next door to
each other.
Yeah it was right there, um,and they were like we don't know
, and you had, I had an address,a map and some coordinates I
didn't know.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
I had a map.
It was in an attachment in anemail.
We made like three loops, yeah,around looking for where we
were supposed to drop this vanoff, before we finally called
them and we were like, hey,where the fuck are we supposed
to drop this van?
Yeah, we are down by the harbor.
There's nothing but parkingstructures and we're about to
(42:46):
leave it on the side of the road.
Speaker 2 (42:47):
We don't know what to do.
Yeah, um help, the guy had tocome physically come down.
He had to physically come down,wave us.
Speaker 1 (42:55):
We never would have found it.
We had to go through this likelittle narrow entryway and then
park in a specific set of rowswhich you fucked up, so he had
to fix it.
I think there's a picture of us.
There's a video, I think, onInstagram of him reparking the
van, I mean.
I will put all these up so youguys can see my shame.
(43:16):
They're on Instagram, yeah, andthen we had to follow him
through like a set of doorswhere there was a key code.
Speaker 2 (43:23):
I think we just that was the like a set of doors
where there was a key code.
I think we just that was thelike employee entrance.
That was just backdoor style.
That was crazy.
Because, when we did get beyondthe actual outside baggage drop
valet, there was a counterthere that we could have just
taken and given the keys to.
But we didn't know that.
We didn't know we went throughthe back alleyway.
Speaker 1 (43:41):
But that's the instructions that were also
attached in the email.
We could have just handed thisguy the keys at the front door,
had we known, but we didn't sowe didn't.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
Anyway, it worked out .
We checked into our hotel,which I don't maybe hold on.
Maybe I'll tell you, um, if itwas the pan pacific or the
fairmont, whatever it was, theviews were incredible, it was
beautiful.
It was the Pan Pacific or theFairmont, whatever it was.
The views were incredible, itwas beautiful.
It was walking distance to abunch of places.
Oh yeah, here's my parking,shame, whatever.
Um, I don't know what it was.
(44:17):
Oh, we went to happy hour there.
Surprise, surprise, yeah, oh,some of these are from you and
some of these are from me, me.
And then we just remember therewas that restaurant I wanted to
go to.
Yes, we said we walked thereand we passed some.
A lovely canadian gentlemanwearing the exact same outfit as
me.
Oh yeah, I had on plaid andcould not have looked more
(44:38):
canadian, had I tried.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
All these will be up on thegram yep, so we took a walk, we
were in, we saw.
We saw the gas town steam clock,which is a big deal there
apparently.
Speaker 1 (44:55):
Um, we saw the original old spaghetti factory,
which is that the original theyclaim to be okay, so I took a
picture of that because my dadlikes the old spaghetti factory
a lot.
We saw xylophone band.
A weird triangle building.
Then we had drinks at a coolbar restaurant.
Speaker 2 (45:14):
What is the name of that place?
I'm the one that wanted to gothere and I don't even remember.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
I don't remember either.
Speaker 2 (45:19):
Oh, guilt and Company .
Okay, spelled G-U-I-L-T.
Not Guilt and Company.
Okay, spelled G-U-I-L-T.
Not guilt like gilded, butguilt as in.
You are guilty.
Guilt and Company.
Yeah, great cocktails, greatsnacks, great bathroom.
It was the Pan Pacific becausewe had fancy geek cars.
(45:40):
God, those views are so fuckingbeautiful.
What are we at time wise here?
About an hour should we stophere for part one, or should we
keep going?
Speaker 1 (45:53):
um well, let's just wrap up part one, and then we'll
um, where do you want to stoppart one?
Speaker 2 (46:01):
do you want to get on the boat?
Speaker 1 (46:04):
I think we should stop right now, before we get on
the boat, cause we had to spendthe night in.
Speaker 2 (46:10):
Vancouver.
Yeah, I didn't know if youwanted to talk about the
dropping our bags and getting onthe boat and what they took
from me.
Speaker 1 (46:18):
Oh yeah, We'll start with that Um in the next episode
.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
this is a long one, so this was the first little
first part of three days and twonights alaska trip of the dead
mom scavenger hunt trip.
Speaker 1 (46:30):
One alaska and then we will um to be continued.
Speaker 2 (46:36):
Thanks for joining us .
Check out thanks for joining us.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
When the next episode drops, we'll talk about getting
on the boat where we we went inAlaska the stops, the food, all
the things and you can find.
Speaker 2 (46:45):
You can email us at dmshpod, at gmailcom.
Our Instagram is at dmshpod andagain, I will post all of our
Alaska stupidity and crazinessin highlights.
Speaker 1 (47:04):
Yes, I will start with alaska one and also drop us
.
Just drop us a message and tellus what you think and, um, let
us know if you've ever been toalaska or to vancouver or
bellingham and what you loved,in case somebody else wants to
take the trip, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (47:20):
Yeah, and if you adopted any of those cute
puppies, the one that I waslooking at, she was half Mastiff
and half Pitbull and she wasblack and white and I think her
name was Dottie right, she haddots.
Oh, if you adopted Dottie, oh,you're a lucky, lucky human.
All right, that's it, bye, bye.
Welcome back to Dead Mom Scavenger.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Hunt, I'm Christmas and I'm Cara and we're going to
talk about the first part of ourDead Mom Scavenger Hunt, alaska
recap.
Alaska yes, um, so there arebasically three legs in
geographically speaking, on thescavenger hunt that she left us.
(00:22):
However, we have taken it uponourselves to also add in things
that we know she wanted to doand isn't able to, things that
we think she would enjoy, thatwe're going to do together,
because she can't, and we'regoing to go do them for her.
Yep, alaska was straight fromthe horse's mouth.
You girls have to take anAlaskan cruise together.
(00:44):
Yep, mouth, you girls have totake an alaskan cruise together.
Yep, cara and I had both beenvehemently cruise, uh, adverse.
Yeah, we had both been on.
I had been on one before, I hadbeen on one also and I said
never again.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
I was like I was 20, wanted to go on a big family
cruise.
So we did that.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
It was lovely to be with the family.
They paid, they made us go.
It was great to get to spendtime with them, but I knew that
cruising was not for me not acruiser.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
What was it about that larger commercial type
cruise that you did not like?
I mean, I know what I didn'tlike but the food sucks.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
Even in the nicest restaurants it's all the same
food.
It comes out of the samekitchen.
It might be a nicer tableclothand it might be nicer flatware,
but most of the food is exactlythe same and it sucks.
The people it was just a bunchof people stuffing themselves at
a buffet.
Um, the pool it looked okaywhen we first got on the boat,
(02:01):
but you know, by day threethere's a nice film it looked
like a frat party had happened.
It looked like pond, like pondscum.
There was like a film oflotions and sunscreens.
Um, there were so many childrenand I have really created my
life such that I'm not aroundscreaming children at all.
(02:25):
Occasionally it happens, butthere were a lot of screamy kids
.
It's just not my scene.
I also, I, whenever I travel, Ilike to go to very non-touristy
, out of the way places.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
You, want an authentic experience.
I want an authentic experience.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
I want authentic food .
I want to give my money to theactual people who live in these
places.
I don't want all the um, quote,unquote.
Ports were basically just in aextension of the cruise ship.
They had the same shittychashkis and a different version
of the same trinkets and likeone of the stops.
(03:06):
In fact I couldn't.
I wanted to find it on a mapand I couldn't find it and I was
like what, why can't I evenfind this on a map?
This is so weird.
Come to find out.
It's actually just a man-madeisland owned by the cruise ship.
Oh my god that.
So you're just giving yourmoney back to the cruise ship.
It's not helping the countrythat you're visiting.
(03:27):
It's not putting money in theirlocal economy.
I think, instead of saying whatdid you like about it or what
didn't you like about it, maybea better question would be what
did you like about it?
Speaker 1 (03:43):
I was trying to establish a comparison like a
bar, Because the bar was so low.
I also had the same complaintswhen I was on the cruise that I
went on the big commercialcruise, yeah, but my biggest
issue was all the waiting aroundall the standing in line, a lot
of lines, yeah, like we stoodin line for lot of lines yeah,
(04:04):
although, like we stood in linefor hours to get on the boat and
then every time you wanted toget on and off the boat, off and
back on, you were in line againfor hours and hours and hours
and it was just fucking awful.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
So that alone made me not want to ever do a cruise
again sure so when bonnie saidto us, when she saddled us with
yes, well, and also also when myhusband and I are my friends
and I travel.
As you know, when we traveltogether, I like to have a very,
very loose, skeletal outlineLike this is where we're going
(04:37):
to sleep.
Maybe, if there's a greatrestaurant that I'm dying to try
, we might have a meal there,but I like to fly by the seat of
my pants and, as you and I say,see where the travel magic
leads us or where, which way thewinds blow us, because that's
where you have the bestexperience, the experience that
you could have never evenimagined.
(04:58):
But if you have this regimentedplan of we're going, we're
going to get on a bus and thenwe're going to go see this, you
know, preserve, and then we'regoing to get on a bus and then
we're going to go see this, youknow, preserve, and then we're
going to get back on.
But also, I hate buses.
I'm not getting on a bus whenyou get really carsick I get
terribly carsick and just Idon't want to feel like I'm
being cattled around.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
I don't think that's really a word, but you know what
I did herded yeah, and I don'twant to and I don't want to be
with a, but I don't want aspoon-fed whitewashed experience
yes, agreed, agreed.
So that's kind of why we wereinitially like, oh god, do we
have to do this?
Speaker 2 (05:35):
but she said yes, you have to do this, yeah so, but
she did not specify what kind ofboat, how big the boat, her
whole thing was.
There's just some beautifullandscapes that you can only see
by boat.
And she was not wrong, notwrong not wrong?
Speaker 1 (05:52):
no, absolutely not so .
So we set to work trying tofind a small outfit.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
A smallish outfit, I think you and I both googled
cruises for people who hatecruises.
Speaker 1 (06:02):
We did that was the first thing I cruised.
I didn't check, I didn't checkchat gpt, because I don't know
if that was even Well at thetime, chat GPT had just become
widely available to us as as uhthe general, to the general
public, and it did not have themore most recent information
online that it does now Gotcha.
So we were, we still had toGoogle things, and I mean, we
(06:23):
still Google things whatever.
It doesn't matter.
The point is we spent copiousamounts of time researching.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
So much research.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
Eventually, you asked some friends of yours who had
been on a smallish it's like amicro luxury cruise.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
Basically it is.
Yeah, there's only 600 peopleon the boat as opposed to 3000,
plus Good God, and it might'veeven been less.
It might have been like four orfive hundred.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
I mean, I know the boat holds that many.
I think part most of thosepeople.
Well, like half Wait is sixhundred.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
Does that include staff?
Speaker 1 (06:52):
OK, so then it's like four hundred guests.
Yeah, maybe four hundred guests.
Four hundred guests, which isnot that many for a cruise.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Two hundred staff, no because there was like one
staff member for every twopeople.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
That sounds right.
If we're wrong, somebodycorrect us or whatever.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Seaborn, feel free to correct us, but we're singing
your praises, so maybe don't.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Or whatever.
Yeah, so we decided on Seaborn,we booked it.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
Yes, and I had friends who had been, and this
circles back to just what Ithink should be really just
advice you should always take inlife.
Ask the gays Lovely gay couplefriends of mine were like we did
a seaborne one and we loved itand I was like I trust them and
(07:32):
I trust their judgment.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
They have impeccable taste.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
They like good food.
They're not going to be herdedaround like show ponies.
Um, and so we landed onseaborne, because it also left
from vancouver and we knew wehad to go to vancouver because
that was on the list.
Yep, from bonnie.
Yeah, um, and it ticked theboxes so we flew out.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
We ended up here, so here was our itinerary for
alaska.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
We flew out on um the 24th which was the day she died
, one year later yep, we met upin the morning in Seattle.
Very teary.
Welcome, welcome.
We looked like lovers runningtowards each other in an embrace
.
You've seen it in the movies,you know.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
We both are notorious overpackers, oh my God.
And you also like to buysweatshirts wherever you go, so
we needed extra luggage forKara's sweatshirts.
Speaker 1 (08:25):
I typically don't buy sweatshirts.
I typically don't even.
I almost never pack a bag likeor check a bag.
I never check a bag, I onlycarry on.
But for this trip we decided weneeded space so we each checked
a bag or two yeah, and you werein charge of the rental car,
okay.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
Okay, to be fair, what you requested was a small
SUV.
I did.
I requested a small SUV.
We just wanted to make sure wehad room for the luggage and we
were going to be doing a littlebit of road tripping, in that we
were driving from Seattle toCanada.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
So we flew into Seattle.
We were spending one night inSeattle and doing all the things
in Seattle Basically a day anda half in Seattle and then we
were going to drive up throughBellingham, spend the afternoon
in Bellingham and then carry oninto Vancouver and spend another
night in Vancouver and then geton the ship the next day, which
is what we did, Correct.
So we got to the airport inSeattle and tearful hello
(09:22):
reunion.
Then we went to look for ourrental car.
This was the first.
This is where the travel magicbegan, because we could not find
no where we were supposed toget this rental.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
In hindsight, I should have read the email with
the instructions in it well,part of this, part of the
challenge was that we werepicking up the car in one
country and dropping it off inanother country.
Yes, so this is not just aregular like Hertz Avis
Enterprise.
Yeah, that adds a degree ofdifficulty.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
Yeah, so I did use a transport company that I was not
familiar with and it did nothave a central hub in the
airport.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
So we ended up, but the reason we chose it was
because we could just drop itoff at the hotel we were staying
at in Vancouver.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
It appeared that that was the case.
Yes, it actually was the case,we just fucked it up.
We'll get there.
Okay, let's not get ahead ofourselves.
First we had to find this SUV.
You can't see me If you're notin our Patreon.
You can't see me making quotesKara's making air quotes.
Air quotes.
Quote SUV, Small SUV.
So we finally found the shuttleto take us to this lot that was
(10:28):
far away from the airport.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
It was a 10 minute drive from the airport.
It was not walkable.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
No.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Put it that way, especially not with our big ass
suitcases.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
With all of our.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
The Couture Malls.
Speaker 1 (10:38):
Yeah, All of our stuff.
We have a picture that'sprobably we'll put it.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
We were really good about documenting this on
Instagram, all different phasesof it, and I will put those on
our Instagram page.
I will put them, though, asInstagram highlights.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
Probably like Alaska 1, Alaska 2, Alaska 3, because
there are 500 plus.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
Yeah, we'll go alaska one through five, um, so you'll
, you'll start with one as hisgreat advice for life.
Yeah, um, but look in thehighlights, because it won't
just be on our regular feed,because it would take up our
regular feed for months at atime yeah, so we documented this
whole thing and it was funnybecause my family was like, oh,
like they were so annoyed that Ikept like sharing all these.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
There was a lot of updates, right, but some people
really loved it.
Oh my gosh, no one was annoyed.
Speaker 2 (11:30):
People, people I didn't even know were texting or
not, however, you like, dmingme through Instagram and being
like this is so funny.
I wake up every morning and,like every day, I just want to
see what you guys are doing, andevery day, I want to see what
ridiculousness is happening, andevery day, I want to see where,
where you're at and what whoyou're meeting and what
experiences you're happening,you're happening, you're
(11:53):
happening, you're happening.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
So we get to this lot and we get off the bus and
we're we're looking for.
I had a picture of the parkingspace number the parking space
number.
The parking space number, but Idon't think it said what kind
of vehicle it was.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
It did not say what kind of vehicle it was.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
And so I was looking for the.
We thought we found the parkinglot number.
It was a little bit like fadedin the concrete.
So the bus takes off and we'restanding there with all of our
luggage and it's this ChevySilverado truck, and I get on
the app that they had asked usto download and I'm having to
(12:27):
take pictures of all of this,this truck, so that they can see
the condition it's in before wetake it, and whatever.
And the keys are supposed to bein it.
Yeah, the keys are supposed tobe in it.
Um, the code that they gave usdid not work.
We could not get into thistruck.
That is because it was thewrong space, at which point we
realized we were in the wrongplace and it was the right
number.
It was like g21 and we were upin t21 or something like that we
were, but we were in the wronglot, yeah, so we had to flag
down another bus, get back on abus, go to this other lot.
(12:51):
We eventually did find it andwe pull up to the lot, the, the
space number, and they're likehere's your vehicle and it's a
14 passenger.
Sprinter van it is a giantsprinter van giant sprinter van
now.
You love.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
You drive everywhere we go, because you get car sick
yes I would have been finedriving the sprinter van oh, I
was so excited to drive this badboy.
I have a transit van at home.
Speaker 1 (13:13):
Yes, you do.
It's basically the same thing.
It's not a tall one, it's amedium roof, but it still is.
You know, it's basically thesame thing.
I would have been okay.
This thing could have easilyheld 20 people.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
I'm surprised they didn't have a special class
license to drive it.
I think it had 14 seatbelts.
Okay, 12 or 14 seats.
Speaker 1 (13:30):
It was a lot.
It was like the biggest onethey make and it was, you know,
big black transit van with allthe blacked out windows.
Oh yeah, I love a big black van, and so we're All right, we're
so overcome with the magnitude.
I think glee is what I wasovercome with.
I was just fucking shocked.
So we get in, we unlock it,we're putting our shit away and
(13:52):
Christmas says wait, where's mybag?
Speaker 2 (13:56):
She's missing a bag, one of my little bags.
Yeah, I had to sprint from thesprinter to the now driving away
bus, yelling wait, do you have?
Speaker 1 (14:05):
a bag and we're going to another country when I bus
yelling wait, do you have a?
Speaker 2 (14:10):
and we're going to another country I've never seen
a woman run so frantically ohdude, flojo got nothing on this
girl when she's missing a bag.
I was in the bag.
Uh, what was in the bag?
It was the tiny bag.
What was it?
Was it like bathroom stuff?
Like personal?
It was bathroom stuff because Ididn't want to have to get into
the big bag until we got on theboat and we were going to be in
seattle and vancouver for twonights, so it was just what I
(14:31):
need for those two nights,clothing wise, but also
toothbrush, toothpaste, yeah,all the stuff you really kind of
want.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
Sleep mask drugs, drugs important things yeah so
she kicks off running after thisvan trying to trying to tackle
this guy to the ground.
Get him to stop this van beforehe leaves the lot to go pick up
more crazy did you see meactually catch it or did you not
know I caught it?
You were you were kind ofaround a billboard.
I couldn't see you when youcaught him until I emerged, I
(14:59):
didn't know you caught him untilyou started walking back with
your.
I emerged victorious, so thatwas I.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
I felt like I was running, you know, walking up
like I feel it coming in the air.
I break the rules.
I know I had brianna vibes, soI was ready to run this town,
and then we were ready to go.
Um, yep, we were ready to goand we were.
I'm very familiar with downtownSeattle.
I love Seattle, I go thereregularly, have spent a good
(15:33):
amount of time there, so I knewwhere we were going and I was
thrilled to.
For those of you in the Patreonwho are seeing the video of
this, I'm just getting to thepictures because I don't want to
forget anything pertinent.
Yeah, I'm looking in mypictures too.
That's what we're looking atand we get off on the exit that
we need to take for downtownSeattle and the our hotel, which
is a hotel that I love.
(15:54):
Cheers to the Inn at the Market, big fan Tip of the hat.
We get off on the exit andwe're driving, you know, down
the street and Kara's like well,I, I mean at least we're the
biggest thing on the road.
At that precise moment, a giantand I mean giant tractor
(16:15):
trailer, john Deere tractorpulls up right next to us on a
main thoroughfare as if to sayyeah like what the fuck?
as if to say oh, you think youare the biggest thing on the
road and you are not.
Yeah, um, there will bepictures on the uh instagram as
well as video.
Yeah, so that's fun.
Um, so we go to check in to thehotel and ditch the car, and at
(16:42):
which point we discover there'snowhere to park.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
They have covered parking and we cannot park under
any circumstances they do nothave a lot.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
You, you have to valet, you must valet, and they
say we can't fit your big bitchhere.
Speaker 1 (16:57):
Yeah, and so we're like well, where do you suggest
we park?
We're just parked on the sideof the street at this point
talking to someone, we're parkedat the valet where they like.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Take your back to the valet and he's like I.
I can't take this.
Yeah, they were I mean they feltbad about it, but they were
like, uh, I don't know.
Well, one guy was like I don'tknow, let me ask my fellow valet
, homie.
And that guy says, well,there's another hotel, two
blocks down, one block up, thathas a few spaces that are not
(17:27):
covered and they might be ableto take it.
So we gave them all our bagsand, with hope and a prayer in
our hearts, we drove to theother hotel and said we will pay
you whatever you want to keepthis for one night, yeah.
And they said that'll be $80.
Is that what it was?
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:45):
Okay, and I said and they said that'll be $80.
Speaker 2 (17:48):
Is that what it was?
Yeah, and I said I'm reallyhappy to pay that.
Thank you very much You'redoing good work here Great work
here yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
So they did take our van and we walked the two blocks
, three blocks, back to thehotel that we were staying at.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Yeah, when our bags already were, which they were
still there.
They were excellent.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
They were great got checked into our room and then,
um, I think we, then we went tolunch.
We, uh, at that point we werelike, can we just get a beer and
some french fries please?
So we walked down to a placewhere also we could oversee the
sound.
Um, we got a great view at pikeplace, had some french fries,
did a beer sampling oh that'sright, which was delicious.
Speaker 1 (18:31):
I don't remember what it was called, but it was.
Speaker 2 (18:33):
I don't remember what that place was called right
either oh it was called.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
Oh, it was old stove beer, oh, old stove brewery.
Speaker 2 (18:41):
Old stove brewery.
Yeah, great view right by PikePlace, um, great view of the Big
Wheel, which was one of thethings that was absolutely on
mom's list.
Old Stove Brewing Company.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
There you go.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
Old Stove Brewing Company.
We had oh God, we had thosewarm pretzels with the cheese
sauce, those like little pretzelbites.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
God, I love a warm pretzel which you needed, the
carbs after running after thattrolley.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
Yeah, yeah yeah, yeah .
Speaker 1 (19:08):
So we had a snack.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
We had a snack and then, oh, because we were
waiting for matt's at the marketto open, because we were going
to get lunch there yes.
So then we walked to matt's atthe market, which was also
another thing that was on mom'slist.
Yep, the big wheel matt's atthe market.
So so far we've only hit thebig wheel mats at the market.
(19:30):
So so far we've only hit.
We go to mats at the market.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
We had this salad that I made 30 times after I got
home I made it once after wegot home and I did not nail it
and I will not try to make itagain, I will make it for you,
okay.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
Um, not right now because melon's not in season,
right, but it was a salad thatwas honey and and I know melon
can be polarizing for people,but trust me when I tell you
this was fucking so good.
Honeydew Cantaloupe, did ithave watermelon too?
Speaker 1 (19:57):
I think it had watermelon too.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
Okay so three kinds of melon, mint, mint A, so
delightfully salty but likecrispy on the outside, grilled
halloumi cheese.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
I had never had halloumi cheese before, so that
was new to me, uh.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
Marcona almonds and a honey mustard dressing with
champagne vinegar.
It was so I called them to getthe recipe for the dressing.
Yeah, it was so good.
I think about that salad a lot.
Yeah, um, had had that.
And at that point I told karait was time to go on the big
(20:34):
wheel.
If you don't know what the bigwheel is in seattle, it is a
permanent structure, giantferris wheel.
So, and you the, the, the seats, it's what would you call those
?
The capsule Cage, the cage youare in.
They're all glass so you'reenclosed.
But you go so high it would beso windy up there, so you have
(20:55):
to be enclosed in glass.
But the views are incredible.
You're right over the PugetSound.
As our mom used to say, themajesty of the Puget Sound.
There's nothing more beautifulthan the majesty of the Puget
Sound.
Speaker 1 (21:08):
I was not.
This was not a highlight of thetrip I was looking forward to.
No, she were kind of dreadingit.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
So I, when I got pregnant with Parker, I
developed out of nowhere, adebilitating fear of heights,
which is so funny.
I'm not the only person thatthis has happened to.
Do you think it's becauseyou're like now I have someone I
have to be around for I thinkit's evolutionary.
I think it's evolutionary.
Yeah, this is someanthropomorphic shit.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
Yeah, because I used to mountain bike in the canyon
in the area where we live andthere's lots of like drop offs
and things.
And mountain lions Well, yeah,but that doesn't matter.
I mean, it matters, but that'snot relevant to the.
Never even thought aboutfalling off the cliff and dying.
It never even occurred to methat that was a problem.
(21:49):
Or an option you had I didn'teven notice the cliff right
After Parker.
That was all I could thinkabout was the sheer edge that I
was going to die off of, and Isuddenly had this like visceral
fear of heights.
That was just out of nowhere.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Because?
Was it because A you didn'twant to die and not see him grow
up, or because you were like Ican't leave him because then
jeremy's a single dad?
Probably both, okay never.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
It wasn't like a conscious thing, it was very
subconscious, visceral.
I don't.
I'm assuming that's what it was, because the older he got he's
18 now the older he got, theless intense it was interesting.
Speaker 2 (22:21):
I don't have children , which is well documented, so
we were curious how this whole,and I'm genuinely curious about
these not that I want kids,because no no, thank you, but I
am curious about you know,because I love you and I love
parker and I love jeremy, I'mcurious about what the actual
feelings were.
Speaker 1 (22:37):
I'm not trying to like no, no, I'm shitty about it
.
No, I didn't think you were.
It was a very interestingphenomena, yeah, that I
experienced, because, um, and Iwas like, no, I don't do heights
, like I don't want to go onthis ferris wheel because I'm
afraid of heights, but I wascurious because we number one,
we had to do it well, and also Itold you that mom was afraid of
heights too.
Speaker 2 (22:57):
Yeah, which she was, and when she and I, I made her
go on the big wheel the firsttime, she went on it and it goes
around thrice and I did know Ihad noted that the fear of
heights was abating slightlyokay over time.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
So I figured we'd we'd just, we're gonna see what
happens.
Yeah, how I feel if I freak out, let me off this fucking thing.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
We didn't know, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (23:17):
This was the first heights experiment we had well
also.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
They have now very smartly changed it so that you
can.
It used to be if you wanted tobring alcohol on the big wheel,
you, you had to sneak it,smuggle it, you had to smuggle
it.
Now they were like, oh, here'san extra revenue stream and
people are doing this anyway.
We stood in line and bought ourwine sippy cups.
Yeah, we had wine sippy cupsthat we took on the big wheel.
(23:41):
It goes around thrice.
When mom and I went on it thefirst time it went up, she was
like, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck,oh fuck, oh fuck.
The second time she was likeokay, I'm feeling a little
better.
Oh, that's kind of pretty.
This is kind of a cool view.
The third time around she waslike, oh my God, this view is
fucking incredible.
This is the greatest thing ofall time.
(24:01):
And then she wanted to go on itagain.
So the feeling.
Speaker 1 (24:08):
So I had a feeling that was kind of what was going
to happen with you, but againdidn't know, Also didn't want to
find out.
And what happened?
It didn't even register that wewere off the ground to me.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
I had no, but how dope were those views.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
It was gorgeous, I mean if you go to Seattle.
I know it sounds cheesy, butget a sippy cup of wine and get
on that Ferris wheel.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
Get on that big wheel .
Speaker 1 (24:30):
Get your sipping cup.
And it was just majestic.
It was majestic as fuck, yeah,so we did the ferris wheel.
It was a success.
Check off the list.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
We were doing so good , we had so many we're doing so
good okay.
So after that we took somepictures.
Where did we go to dinner?
Oh, zigzag.
We went to zigzag.
I love zigzag um.
Big fans of zigzag cafe.
Um, the staff there isincredible, they're lovely.
(24:54):
The owner's great.
It was amazing, cool vibes um,and we had had a pretty big and
emotional day at that point.
Speaker 1 (25:01):
So I yeah, by that point, what was it I was?
I was smoked and, as you know,I don't do well in loud, dark
places late at night.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
Yeah, kara um kara handled sensory issues yeah,
carol kara handles crowds andsensory issues much differently
than I do, which is to say thatI don't.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
If I don't, I try not to handle them at all yeah, um,
um.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
So we we got to the hotel and found that not only
did we have the exact same sleepmask, we both had the same
readers, because now that's athing, the reason that we had
the same sleep mask, because Iasked you oh, did you?
I ordered the one that you toldme to order, that's why Okay.
Speaker 1 (25:41):
Um, but yeah, my my glasses, I don't wear readers.
Well, I do now, but I didn'tthen.
Um, I my glasses, I don't wearreaders well I do now, but I
didn't then.
Um, I my glasses matched yourreaders when I put yeah, I took
my contacts out, my glasses andyour glasses were like I don't
even need readers and they'renot prescription and in fact
they look so cute on you though,oh thanks.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Um, I went to the eye doctor because I was sure I was
like I must need readersbecause I bought, surely, surely
, well, and I bought a pair.
That was just a level one and Iput them on and I was like holy
shit, I did not know this bookcould be this clear.
I have superhuman sight.
Now I can read anything.
I just look at me, look at me.
I was, it was just.
(26:18):
It was like those stupid oldblue blockers.
Commercials like these new blueblockers are great.
Everything's so much sharperand clearer.
But I felt like that.
So I ever since then, when Iread a book at night and I'm one
of those people that alwaysreads at night my level one
readers are great, and Iactually tried level like 1.25
(26:39):
or 1.5, and it was too much justto just a gentle little one.
So we had the same readers andsleep mask and looked like big
fucking nerds.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure youposted that picture too.
There's so many pictures.
Um spent the night.
Luckily, cara and I are bothearly birds in the morning time,
thank god, um, we got up, wewent and had at one of my
(27:01):
favorite bakeries a ham andcheese croissant.
That's so good it will make youcry.
Is this where we fess upbecause your husband's never
gonna listen to this, or do we?
Speaker 1 (27:10):
not he makes it to this episode, I would be shocked
kara's husband is a vegetarianand he feels very passionate
about it which I get.
Speaker 2 (27:19):
We have been to therapy over a chicken salad
sandwich yes, he, um, he feelsvery strongly about it, so kara
does not eat the agreement thecontract in my home.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Okay, great Is that we don't cook meats at home.
I mean other than Parker eatingsteak and things like that, but
we don't cook chicken at home.
Speaker 2 (27:39):
Well, and you don't cook meat for yourself at home.
Speaker 1 (27:41):
Right when I am at home with my husband and my
family.
He and I are vegetarian.
Speaker 2 (27:47):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Out in the world.
I am an independent contractor,yes, and I can do what I want.
Yes, it would hurt his heart tosee me eat ham.
Speaker 2 (27:57):
So it made my heart very happy, because you should
have seen the look on her facewhen she bought in or brought
bought bit bit, bought bit bit.
I bought.
When she bought, you boughtinto it and you bit into it.
When she bit into this ham andcheese croissant, which also has
just a little bit of a Bernaysin it, the look on her face it
(28:19):
was what was the name of thebakery?
I think it's just La Blu,lingerie or something like that.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
It wasn't really.
Oh no, that's not.
Speaker 2 (28:26):
I have a tote bag from there in the other room,
but I'm not going to get up andget it.
Speaker 1 (28:30):
Hold on, I'll find it .
We'll link it in the show notes, don't?
Speaker 2 (28:31):
worry about it.
It's at Pike Place.
It's like the main Frenchbakery there.
It's literally kitty cornerfrom the end of the market.
You can see it from there.
It was a great coffee, greattea and those croissants, man.
Um, we walked through pikeplace, we looked at beautiful
(28:53):
flowers, we saw all thewonderful farm standee markets
and, oh god, seafood and big assshrimp and medium ass shrimp.
Um, and then we decided we hadto kind of get going because we
had places to go and we had tomake it to Vancouver.
We had to book it.
We had to book it to Bellinghambecause we were planning on
(29:14):
spending some time in Bellingham, which is mom's hometown.
Oh, I almost said shout out,big ups to Bellingham.
What's the punishment forsaying shout out?
You get to slap me.
Speaker 1 (29:24):
No, I don't want to slap you you can punch me in the
arm.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
Oh, to slap me?
No, I don't want to slap you.
You can punch me in the arm.
Oh, that was a pathetic punch,wasn't it God?
You punched like a puss.
Go ahead, that's better.
I know I can do better thanthat.
That was better.
And we wanted to spend sometime in downtown Bellingham.
We had two addresses of housesthat she lived in when she was
little.
Speaker 1 (29:41):
One was an actual oh wait wait, don't get a two ahead
of made a.
We made a big discovery on theway to bellingham, do you tell?
We discovered that I am theshittiest videographer.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
Oh my god, okay, since I was driving, I was like
carrie, you have to takepictures for the gram of like
street signs.
It was a simple assignment.
Cara might be the worstphotographer slash photo
documentarian of anyone I haveever met in my life, and she's a
very bright woman with lots ofdifferent skill sets.
(30:15):
This is not one of them.
I don't you couldn't even tryto get it that bad.
No, I couldn't be worse if Itried.
If you go to the gram, you willget to see some of her work.
She is very it turns out verygood at taking pictures of one
thing and one thing only, andthat is Ford Rangers Ford.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
Rangers.
I am pretty good at capturingthe Ford Rangers For some reason
in so many pictures.
Speaker 2 (30:40):
There's just one random, crystal and clear Ford
fucking Ranger.
And every other picture isblurry, it's just raindrops,
it's your feet, it's the centerconsole, it's just your hand
covering it.
Look, man.
Speaker 1 (30:58):
We can't all be good at all the things it's true,
it's very true and, like I said,you have many other amazing
skills that I'm so grateful for.
I was not gifted in this area,no no.
I am all you had at this moment.
So we have.
You're often all I have we havecorners of signs that we were
trying to capture and thingslike that.
So we were trying to capture,like the picture of the
(31:18):
Bellingham Welcome to, pictureof the bellingham welcome to
bellingham side, and it's likeraindrops on the windshield, not
even in focus and no, it'sterrible.
There's some great video of melip syncing and this continued.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
This was a trend that continued throughout the trip,
but we did.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
Oh, it continues to this day we did eventually make
it to bellingham which is one ofthe cutest towns of all time.
Yeah, we had a really cute.
So what did we?
Where did we go?
First in Bellingham.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
First did we get snacks, first Did we go to the
taco place.
Speaker 1 (31:49):
No, we went to her house first.
Speaker 2 (31:51):
We did.
Speaker 1 (31:51):
Yeah, it looks like according to my calculations, we
went to the houses.
Oh, here's a Ford Rangerpicture.
We took some pictures, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:57):
Okay, we took pictures, oh, yeah.
So we went to the two placesthat she grew up.
One of them is so cute and hadlike 27 hummingbird feeders.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
Yeah, it was adorable .
And, like Mardi Gras beads, westopped and took a picture of
Queen Anne's lace.
Her favorite flower Growing upthrough the concrete, because
that was her favorite flower,which a lot of people think it's
a weed.
Speaker 2 (32:15):
I mean, I guess it technically is a weed.
Yeah, I guess, but it grows.
It's really, it's in the eye ofthe beholder, it's true.
And then, oh, we went and sawBellingham High, yep, her high
school, home of the fighting.
What are pine trees?
No Osprey.
Speaker 1 (32:36):
No, what are they?
Speaker 2 (32:37):
What's Bellingham High School?
Speaker 1 (32:38):
I have no idea.
Somebody tell us.
Speaker 2 (32:40):
Home of the wild cats .
No that sounds right, actuallydoes it well, it might be wild
cats, it might not.
Um, um, yeah, we don't know.
Speaker 1 (32:51):
We don't know.
Speaker 2 (32:52):
Somebody tell us it's probably right in and tell I'm
gonna guess it's not the pinetrees or the osprey home of the
fighting hiking boots.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
We did look this up on the the trip because they
have changed it since it wasdifferent.
It was home of something whenshe was there.
It is not the same now.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
Well, no, it's a bigger high school, but they
didn't change the mascot, didthey?
Yeah, oh, for politicallycorrect reasons.
What is Bellingham?
Speaker 1 (33:15):
High's mascot.
Speaker 2 (33:19):
Sorry, it is home of the Bay Hawks, okay, okay, big
red is it was previously the redraiders, remember?
Speaker 1 (33:30):
okay, it was changed to a bird of prey when the
school reopened in 2000 after atwo-year closure.
Speaker 2 (33:35):
So okay okay, problem , the fighting mystery solve.
See wait, see bay hawagles, bayhawks my god, my god seagulls,
sea eagles, the bay hawks um,okay anyways, then we went into
downtown bellingham, which isadorable, which is adorable.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
I had parked the van like a fucking rock star you did
really poorly, really poorly,on every parking assignment with
that big ass thing it was, wasit wasn't good, it wasn't great
we all have our weaknesses.
Thank you, and I love youanyway.
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
Luckily I had you to guide me in air traffic control
style on a few of them.
Yeah, left to my own devices.
I would have parked at an anglewith the ass end of the van
four feet from the curb.
Speaker 1 (34:21):
I think we posted a picture on Instagram of this guy
that we saw with a cat on hisshoulder.
Speaker 2 (34:26):
Oh yeah, like a parrot just perched down.
Yeah, just walking down thestreet.
Speaker 1 (34:29):
Not a parrot, but a cat, that's when we went to the
Mexican food place and got likemargaritas or something.
We got margaritas and guacamole.
Speaker 2 (34:36):
And then we walked to a distillery that I wanted to
check out, but before we got tothe distillery Next door, to the
distillery.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
Yes, we got waylaid.
Speaker 2 (34:46):
We got so waylaid by a doggy Rescue.
Speaker 1 (34:53):
I mean, what do you even call this Like?
Well, it's like they have those, those cat cafes.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
It was like a puppy rescue, yeah, and you could go
in, you could go in and look atthe puppies and look at the
puppies playing or play with thepuppies.
You could pay a small fee andgo inside the gates and play
with the puppies.
And my favorite smell on theplanet puppy paws, puppy breath
oh, I like puppy paws.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
Oh, there's like corn chips popcorn oh, I okay.
Speaker 2 (35:19):
Yeah, they smell like malolactic fermentation.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
I live in the wine country.
Give me the puppies oh puppybreath.
Speaker 2 (35:27):
There was one that I was very close to trying to
figure out.
Didn't you call Hammer and say,hey, this puppy home, but not
(35:47):
for a week?
Also, it's a Mastiff pit bullmix and it's the cutest thing
I've ever seen.
He didn't go for it.
We have a beautiful, sweetlittle rescue pit bull already.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
If you're in the Patreon.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
You can see her.
She's sleeping right behind us.
Then we went to the distilleryChill no, what's it called Chill
Cook?
Speaker 1 (36:10):
No, that was in Alaska.
Speaker 2 (36:12):
It is called, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
I have pictures of us at the bar, but I don't
remember what it was called.
Did you buy some hot sauce fromthere.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
I did because I have a friend who lives in seattle um
big snaps to funky's hot sauce.
If you are in oh sorry, helives in bellingham.
Actually, if you're in thebellingham area um funky's hot
sauce, he makes lots of them.
They're very, very good.
Yeah, what was the name of thatdistillery?
I feel like it started with a c.
I think the bar was called thepenny farthing.
The bar at the penny farthingit was yeah that's the name of
the bar that's connected to it.
(36:50):
Yeah, um, penny farthingfunky's hot sauce.
Speaker 1 (36:55):
We got out of there and made our way to the border
yep, so we drove the rest of theway up to the border, and if
you've ever crossed the Canadianborder, you will know that well
.
If you've ever crossed theCanadian border with any degree
of regularity which we used todo when I was a kid all the time
, you will know that it is atotal crapshoot.
(37:16):
As to which type of borderagent you're going to get, yeah,
yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Yeah, yeah of border agent you're gonna get.
Speaker 1 (37:24):
Yeah, yeah, yeah could be a friendly person who's
like I feel like I've gottenlucky and really only had
friendly ones.
Uh, yeah, so my grandma iriswas really lucky in that way.
She would always tease them andlike flirt with the young men
and always be like like shecould have smuggled anything
across the border I cannotpicture your grandma iris
flirting with anyone she wouldalways wink at him and be like
how you doing honey, like shewas so funny with the border
patrol agents.
Speaker 2 (37:44):
I'm going to be like that when I'm old.
Speaker 1 (37:48):
Jeremy, when he crossed the border after a
mountain biking trip, he gotthis border control agent.
He was coming back into the USand this guy was like are you
bringing back any alcohol orfruits or vegetables or anything
like that?
And they're like I think wehave a few beers back there, but
otherwise no, or fruits orvegetables or anything like that
.
And they're like I think wehave a few beers back there, but
otherwise no, and he was likehow many beers Jesus Christ?
Like real aggressive and thiswas a US agent.
Speaker 2 (38:08):
right, yeah, that tracks.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
That tracks yeah, we're not real proud of where
we're at right now as a country,but that's another episode.
Speaker 2 (38:14):
And our Canadian brethren are known for being
polite.
Yeah, yeah, they're.
I mean, I'm canadian.
Yeah, kara is my mom's.
Kara has dual citizenship andI've never been more jealous.
My nana dropped the ball andrelink or like, let hers lapse,
and then didn't get it from mymom.
So I do not have canadiancitizenship.
I wish I did.
If there's any citizenshiplawyers out there who would like
(38:37):
to contact me about where wasyour nana born?
Uh, nana, she would have to getit because I think she was.
I think she was born in the us.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
Okay, then it wouldn't apply to you anyway.
Speaker 2 (38:50):
It was only ever two generations of descent, okay, so
her mom could have gotten it,but she you couldn't okay, but I
think there are some loopholes,if there's any canadian
citizenship lawyers who know ofa way that I could get it or buy
it, well, you can?
Speaker 1 (39:08):
I've read.
Speaker 2 (39:09):
Anyway, okay, we're getting way off track.
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
Speaker 1 (39:11):
This is going to be a long episode anyway, because
we're hovering the trip, right.
Speaker 2 (39:14):
Yeah, it might be a two-parter.
We don't know, we might have tobreak it up.
Speaker 1 (39:16):
We'll let you know, we'll.
Crossed through.
The guy was giving him a hardtime and he was like pull over,
let me look in your van.
How many beers, how many beersthey're like I don't know, like
five or ten or whatever.
And they're like, ah, pull over.
And he did go through all theirstuff and he found a bell
pepper, like a single bellpepper that what color was it?
Speaker 2 (39:32):
I think it was a red bell pepper.
Okay, well, if it was green,they should be arrested.
Speaker 1 (39:35):
They had forgotten it was in there in the cooler, and
they're like oh yeah, sorry, weforgot about that and he was,
he held it up and he's like I'mtaking this, oh and they're like
okay, we ran into a bad, like akind of a dick when we crossed
over on a whistler trip bellpeppers several years ago
because we went to kind of anout of the way one of the
(39:55):
stations that was kind of well,the crossing was kind of out of
the way because it was.
My mom said it would be like noline that time of day and the
guy was like why are youcrossing through here?
What?
Why didn't you go throughBlaine Like he was also?
yeah, and we were like I don'tknow.
My mom said to go through hereand it ended up being fine, so
we didn't know where we were,what we were going to get at the
at the border.
(40:16):
But we like spoiler alert wedid get through, but but she was
very suspicious as to why wewere driving a giant cargo van
with two people in it, with onlytwo people.
She was like so why are youdriving?
Literally just asked usstraight out why are you driving
a giant cargo van?
Speaker 2 (40:33):
we said you know what we?
Had the same goddamn question.
We would also love to know theanswer to that.
Yes, we tried to get a compactsuv, yeah, so we looked and we
ended up with this Also on myflight.
There was a group of maybe 14young Mormon boys that's right
Heading out on on their mission.
(40:54):
Um, I got to wonder if maybethose 14 had to maybe squeeze
into a compact SUV it was meantfor us while we rolled out in
their sprinter.
Speaker 1 (41:06):
Yeah, so we did get through the border and we headed
into Vancouver With one veryimportant stop we had to drop
the van off.
Speaker 2 (41:15):
No, before that.
Oh, we had to stop and getketchup chips.
We had to stop and get all thedelightful Canadian snacks, and
all dressed chips, all dressedchips, and the violet crumble
yes, all the.
Canadian treats.
All the Canadian snacks, snacksall dressed, all dressed,
violet crumble.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
Yes, all the canadian treats, all the canadian snacks
.
My god, I love ketchup.
So good, all dressed, all of it.
So we got all our trash snacks,trash snacks, and then we
hightailed it over to the hotel,as do you want me to make you a
cheese?
Cracker.
Uh, sure, okay, I think westayed at the pan pacific we did
stay at the pan pacific um, andwe needed to drop off the van
(41:50):
the van the.
Speaker 2 (41:53):
Thank you, I'll let you take over while I eat my um,
we had to drop off the van and,as we said before, the part of
the reason we rented this van isbecause it would be so easy to
just drop it off at the panpacific.
And we pull up to the panpacific and we're like so where
do we drop it off?
Speaker 1 (42:11):
it might have been the fairmont, was it?
Speaker 2 (42:14):
either way, it was right there, right next door to
each other.
Yeah it was right there, um,and they were like we don't know
, and you had, I had an address,a map and some coordinates I
didn't know.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
I had a map.
It was in an attachment in anemail.
We made like three loops, yeah,around looking for where we
were supposed to drop this vanoff, before we finally called
them and we were like, hey,where the fuck are we supposed
to drop this van?
Yeah, we are down by the harbor.
There's nothing but parkingstructures and we're about to
(42:46):
leave it on the side of the road.
Speaker 2 (42:47):
We don't know what to do.
Yeah, um help, the guy had tocome physically come down.
He had to physically come down,wave us.
Speaker 1 (42:55):
We never would have found it.
We had to go through this likelittle narrow entryway and then
park in a specific set of rowswhich you fucked up, so he had
to fix it.
I think there's a picture of us.
There's a video, I think, onInstagram of him reparking the
van, I mean.
I will put all these up so youguys can see my shame.
(43:16):
They're on Instagram, yeah, andthen we had to follow him
through like a set of doorswhere there was a key code.
Speaker 2 (43:23):
I think we just that was the like a set of doors
where there was a key code.
I think we just that was thelike employee entrance.
That was just backdoor style.
That was crazy.
Because, when we did get beyondthe actual outside baggage drop
valet, there was a counterthere that we could have just
taken and given the keys to.
But we didn't know that.
We didn't know we went throughthe back alleyway.
Speaker 1 (43:41):
But that's the instructions that were also
attached in the email.
We could have just handed thisguy the keys at the front door,
had we known, but we didn't sowe didn't.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
Anyway, it worked out .
We checked into our hotel,which I don't maybe hold on.
Maybe I'll tell you, um, if itwas the pan pacific or the
fairmont, whatever it was, theviews were incredible, it was
beautiful.
It was the Pan Pacific or theFairmont, whatever it was.
The views were incredible, itwas beautiful.
It was walking distance to abunch of places.
Oh yeah, here's my parking,shame, whatever.
Um, I don't know what it was.
(44:17):
Oh, we went to happy hour there.
Surprise, surprise, yeah, oh,some of these are from you and
some of these are from me, me.
And then we just remember therewas that restaurant I wanted to
go to.
Yes, we said we walked thereand we passed some.
A lovely canadian gentlemanwearing the exact same outfit as
me.
Oh yeah, I had on plaid andcould not have looked more
(44:38):
canadian, had I tried.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
All these will be up on thegram yep, so we took a walk, we
were in, we saw.
We saw the gas town steam clock,which is a big deal there
apparently.
Speaker 1 (44:55):
Um, we saw the original old spaghetti factory,
which is that the original theyclaim to be okay, so I took a
picture of that because my dadlikes the old spaghetti factory
a lot.
We saw xylophone band.
A weird triangle building.
Then we had drinks at a coolbar restaurant.
Speaker 2 (45:14):
What is the name of that place?
I'm the one that wanted to gothere and I don't even remember.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
I don't remember either.
Speaker 2 (45:19):
Oh, guilt and Company .
Okay, spelled G-U-I-L-T.
Not Guilt and Company.
Okay, spelled G-U-I-L-T.
Not guilt like gilded, butguilt as in.
You are guilty.
Guilt and Company.
Yeah, great cocktails, greatsnacks, great bathroom.
It was the Pan Pacific becausewe had fancy geek cars.
(45:40):
God, those views are so fuckingbeautiful.
What are we at time wise here?
About an hour should we stophere for part one, or should we
keep going?
Speaker 1 (45:53):
um well, let's just wrap up part one, and then we'll
um, where do you want to stoppart one?
Speaker 2 (46:01):
do you want to get on the boat?
Speaker 1 (46:04):
I think we should stop right now, before we get on
the boat, cause we had to spendthe night in.
Speaker 2 (46:10):
Vancouver.
Yeah, I didn't know if youwanted to talk about the
dropping our bags and getting onthe boat and what they took
from me.
Speaker 1 (46:18):
Oh yeah, We'll start with that Um in the next episode
.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
this is a long one, so this was the first little
first part of three days and twonights alaska trip of the dead
mom scavenger hunt trip.
Speaker 1 (46:30):
One alaska and then we will um to be continued.
Speaker 2 (46:36):
Thanks for joining us .
Check out thanks for joining us.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
When the next episode drops, we'll talk about getting
on the boat where we we went inAlaska the stops, the food, all
the things and you can find.
Speaker 2 (46:45):
You can email us at dmshpod, at gmailcom.
Our Instagram is at dmshpod andagain, I will post all of our
Alaska stupidity and crazinessin highlights.
Speaker 1 (47:04):
Yes, I will start with alaska one and also drop us
.
Just drop us a message and tellus what you think and, um, let
us know if you've ever been toalaska or to vancouver or
bellingham and what you loved,in case somebody else wants to
take the trip, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (47:20):
Yeah, and if you adopted any of those cute
puppies, the one that I waslooking at, she was half Mastiff
and half Pitbull and she wasblack and white and I think her
name was Dottie right, she haddots.
Oh, if you adopted Dottie, oh,you're a lucky, lucky human.
All right, that's it, bye, bye.
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