April 25, 2023 • 42 mins
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You relate to feeling lost and confused...and no one understands the antidote to those feelings better than my guest: Christina Drouin. If you've ever felt like you know you need to live differently but feel unclear about what you need (that will actually feel good and WORK for you) and HOW to implement it...girl, you are in the right place!
This episode is your view into building a specialized life plan that is aligned with your SOUL.
"Divine alignment occurs when the mind finds what the soul needs, and the heart desires." -Christina Drouin
Too often, we are mentally & emotionally overwhelmed, which distracts us from our true purpose and path. In this episode, Christina helps you tune into your core values and mission - which DO NOT disappear just because you are in a crisis.
Learn more about Christina Drouin and her work Here:
http://www.sacredjourneymapping.company.site/
or pick up a copy of her book here
https://www.amazon.com/Course-Sacred-Journey-Mapping-Second/dp/1735144630
Post Divorce Roadmap - 21 Days of Guided Journaling
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A podcast exploring the journey of life after divorce, delving into topics like divorce grief, loneliness, anxiety, manifesting, the impact of different attachment styles and codependency, setting healthy boundaries, energy healing with homeopathy, managing the nervous system during divorce depression, understanding the stages of divorce grief, and using the Law of Attraction and EMDR therapy in the process of building your confidence, forgiveness and letting go.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Hi, love, this is Dawn and you're listening to
Dear Divorce Diary with my coach, dawn, where we explore the
post-divorce life and you, thewoman who lives it.
We cover everything from traumaduring and after divorce to
feeling like a stranger in yourown life and the new frontier of
life as a single woman.
We're cozy in for theconversations we've been longing
(00:26):
to have about this new life.
Hi, loves, we have such a treatfor you today.
We have an amazing guest,christina Druin, a dear friend
of mine.
We go way, way back.
Welcome, christina.
(00:47):
Thank you Great to be here,dawn.
It is such an honor to have you.
So, christina and I go back anumber of years, nearly 15 now.
I think it's wild And we metbecause you came to me for grief
counseling, which is just sucha huge part of your story and
(01:08):
probably part of the birthplaceof what we're going to talk
about today.
Yes, indeed So, so many yearslater, you've been working as a
strategic planner for nonprofitsand our listeners might think
like well, dawn, what does astrategic planner for nonprofits
have to do with divorcerecovery?
But just wait, just wait.
(01:29):
It's so good And you've createda book and a course to help
people find their strategicpersonal spiritual life plan.
Yes, exactly, and I cannot waitto unpack it all because you
(01:52):
know I heard this quote recentlythat we're over resource with
regards to information.
We are given so muchinformation about what we need
to do and what we need to healand what we need to align, but
we're under resourced around theimplementation of the
information The how in the heck,dawn and Christina, do I
(02:13):
actually do it?
And what you and I are going tounpack today is an
implementation tool of like epicproportions.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
That's a huge statement.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
Yes, let's do it, let's do it, okay.
So I'm going to start byreading this quote of yours And
then I'm going to turn it overto you a bit.
But when I first land on yourwebsite right, this is the first
sentence I read and it justgives me all the chills.
Divine alignment occurs whenthe mind finds what the soul
(02:48):
needs and the heart desires.
I'm going to read it one moretime Divine alignment occurs
when the mind finds what thesoul needs and the heart desires
.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Yes, It's powerful.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
And I know that that's what our listeners today
are searching for.
Their minds are searching forthe things that their soul needs
and their heart desires, andthey need help with the how And
here you are, yes, and we thankyou, and we begin with the soul.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
I mean, i think when we begin with the soul we think
about.
That's our essence.
You know, our definingattribute is the soul, and so
it's the soul's cry that we wantto respond to.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
The soul is Right not the mind Exactly, yes, yes.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
And I think in our world, to your point about all
the information, we tend to gothe mind, the mind, the mind.
But there's a place to startthat isn't the mind, the place
is the soul.
What is the soul's, what is thesoul need?
And the soul needs more thananything, alignment.
(04:14):
The soul needs to understandthe human Yes And what the human
values, more than anything else, because that's the definition,
that's the personality I meanwe all have.
So every soul is different,right, As every person is
different.
And every soul is differentbecause every soul is made up of
(04:37):
different ideals and differentpriorities that are given to
With our own specific purpose.
Yes, exactly, exactly, and a lotof people I know who doesn't
want to find their purpose.
Everyone's looking for their.
Well, i found in my work,whether it's schools or
individuals, and I've been doingthis process with individuals
(04:57):
since 2016.
Okay, okay, so I just Duringthe pandemic.
In fact, i just put it into abook.
I was During the pandemic.
Yeah, during the pandemic, whenall my clients I work with
schools and faith-basedorganizations Nobody was in
person, everyone was frantic.
So, rather than not do anythingin my apartment overlooking
(05:21):
fights in CrossRam, mentel,manhattan, i said I'm going to
be inspired here.
Here I am in this location,above the world in a way.
You know high up.
Let me do something with thistime.
So I use the time to marry themodel that I use in my business
practice.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
With larger organizations.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
Right, with larger organizations, with the human
beings that also could benefitfrom having their own personal
plan, and I had been doing itwith small groups since 2016,.
But with stapled workbooks.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
You know how that is.
You put it all down here, kindof winging it Exactly, and had
so and still in contact with thesacred journey mappers that
went through that process atthat time and knew that there
was something there And Ithought, okay, you know, i
always look and say, okay, ifyour calendar is being cleared,
(06:25):
what is it that the divine wantsyou to do with this time?
I mean, that's my point of view.
So my calendar was cleared, aswas the world.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
Well, sure, And you know, just to tie it together
for our listeners, when you'regoing through divorce and you're
, you've lost so much of yourtrue identity, let's call
relationship loss a calendarclearing of sorts.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Yes, exactly.
So if we look at that calendarclearing as not as a negative
discourse but as a positiveopportunity that the space has
been cleared, you know, for anew time and a new point of view
and new discovery, so I alwayslook at that time as a time to
(07:13):
go inward you know, and becauseI've had trauma in my life, as
you know, i mean the original,you know, reason we met was for
grief, counseling, the loss ofmy husband, son loss of my
husband, and that inwardperspective, that time to go
inward can be something thatthat people that can handicap
(07:39):
you and paralyze you or it canfree you And I think it depends
on your point of view.
And I think if you, when you gothrough, so there's a line in
the book about in my book DearGod, where Do I Go From Here?
That you talked about a minuteago, that says you know your
(08:03):
core values in your mission.
Don't disappear in a crisis.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
They don't, they don't, we talk about that in
psychology.
Yes, we talk about that inpsychology, that there is always
this part of self right, and inspirituality we would call it
soul, but there is a part ofself that remains unaffected by
the traumas, clear, pure,unaffected.
Yes, yes, and the more you go,covered up by all the mind noise
(08:29):
.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Exactly, and that's why I think the work that I do
with individuals taking thatmodel into the human, you know,
the circle of life it gives them.
They write it down, they writedown their core values, they put
them on their phone.
They make a rock garden, aspiritual rock.
You know core values, rockgarden, to remind them.
(08:50):
I had a person who justfinished up that chapter in the
book that talks about thespiritual, that talks about core
values, and she sent me ascreenshot of her phone
screenshot, which is core valueson rocks.
I look at this every minute,every day, so you know what we
know internally.
Such can be, can feel fleeting,can feel like a clock going by
(09:17):
until we animate it.
I think if you make it thatfeeling, if you make it an
object, if you make it, intosomething.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Yes, we talk about that all the time on the pod and
I certainly use that tool.
I have mirror messages and, yes, i use my phone screen
background And if you could seebehind my desk here, you know
all the things that are pinned,because we do need those cues,
because it is we forget.
we're human, we forget, and soyou are providing a path for us
to get clarity and then to havea way to remind ourselves.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
Yes, yes, and also then, as you said, to remind
yourself, with an inanimateobject.
I have a rock that I wrote onthat.
Turn it.
On one side it's turn it over,and on the other side it's turn
it over.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
Turn it over And I turn it over.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
I can't even tell you how many times I turn it over
Literally it's with the-.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
It creates mind-muscle connection.
Exactly.
It sounds like a silly thing,something you would think about
at the gym to create mind-muscleconnection, but that's the
value of a God box in when I wasworking the steps in Allen on
and I had a God box right Andbecause when you write it down
and you put it in the box themind is like, oh okay, I gave
(10:40):
that over.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Yes, right.
And then if you can take thatfurther and turn it into a rule
of life in spirituality whetherit's meditation or whether it's
something, a place you go everysingle day, whether it's
journaling you know this fromyour work that you make it, that
you ritualize it then that corevalue that defines you- Has a
(11:07):
place to be expressed.
Absolutely, captain toAbsolutely, and then, once you
get your core values in place,which I think it's people.
When I first did this work,when I first did the
self-discovery work, i actuallythought my values were not were
different.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
But when I went, in and Like you thought it was one
thing and it turned out to beYeah.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
I mean I thought freedom was a huge value of mine
.
I thought independence becauseI'm a so independent woman I
mean I have been ever, foreverAnd I thought, you know, and
independence qualifies as avalue, freedom qualifies as a
value.
Values are nouns, they're notoutcomes.
You know they are they have inand of themselves intrinsic
(11:57):
worth And we all have what Icall a constellation of values
that make up our beings And wemake our decisions on the basis
of those values every day.
But there are only a very fewthat are, if you think of your
constellation, if you think of aconstellation, there are very
(12:17):
few that are the sun They giveyou that light and life Other
circle around you.
They'll be in those you know,like Pluto and Mars.
If Pluto was still a planet.
I don't see that.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
So are you teaching us that your process, your book
and your course teaches us?
to be able to tease out thedifference between our core
values and our beliefs, like,because a belief is just a
thought that we've thought anumber of times.
Right, and for many of us hereon the pod, independence is
actually a sign of trauma, right, it's that over-independent way
(12:50):
is actually from having beentoo resilient for too long.
Right, it's actually a traumasymptom typically.
So you're helping us, throughyour work, tease out What is
actually a core value from whatmaybe might be like a low-key,
hidden, negative belief orlimiting belief.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Yes, yes, and I mean values are defined you at your
best.
So, when you are at your best,what are the ideals that define
you?
So for me, those ideals arehope, joy, love, peace.
I see Gratitude, yes.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
They define you at your best.
And that is so powerful,Christina, because in this now
moment, our listeners are notfeeling their best And we get
bogged down in that right, Weget lost in the heaviness of it
and we lose track.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Yes, yes, But when you get, when that?
but that's your soul, that'sthe fabric of your soul.
Is you at your best?
Yes, That's your soul, is yourbest right?
So if you can get in touch withthose things to find you And
for me those things were, it wasdiscovery And then they, they
(14:13):
then, and this is where, to me,the power of this practice is in
connecting these values thatyou discover And you can only
discern them, and they're yoursand they're indefensible.
You don't have to defend themto anybody.
You know they are what is truefor you.
(14:34):
They define the heart and thesoul of the matter for you when
you are at your best and to dothat work, to get in touch with
those no more than five causeothers will be the constant.
So the more core values thatyou introduce into your system,
the more you introduce theopportunity to conflict, because
(14:55):
you make your decision on thebasis of your core values,
uh-huh uh-huh If you have 20core values you can't make
everybody happy all the time.
Exactly.
So you want to define thosevery few, up to five, which is
the five I gave you were mine.
Okay, So once you get those inplace, then those and connect to
(15:16):
your purpose, your life purpose, your mission, why you exist.
So, core values answer thequestion what do I stand for?
Mission answers the questionwhy do I exist?
So how do you know why youexist until you know?
Speaker 1 (15:32):
what you stand for.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
When you get the, what youstand for, in place, then all
the things, all the reasons youthink you may exist, whether
it's to do this activity or thatactivity or be a teacher, I
mean I write in the book.
How you know, until I did thiswork, I, you know, I thought my
(15:55):
purpose was to be.
I always wanted to be a teacher, my whole life, since I was a
little kid, right, Uh-huh.
But when I stopped teaching didI lose my life purpose?
Speaker 1 (16:04):
No.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
You know, I always, I always-.
No, because that's a role.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
Exactly A role We are , not our roles.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
Exactly, i always wanted to be a wife and a mother
.
When my husband died, mm-hmm.
There went that role yeah,exactly, that wasn't my purpose.
Purpose, you know, purpose, istranscendent of all that.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
What you are talking about right now is such a big
deal.
I think so.
Our roles are not our purpose.
They can be part of it, right,they can be an expression of Yes
, but they are not one and thesame.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
Exactly And that when you get that and you I don't
think you can get that,personally I don't think you can
get that until you're in touchwith your values, you have to do
that preliminary work.
When you do that, then the testof a mission statement, and
everyone could have one.
You know if you have and I'llshare mine with you in a minute,
(17:01):
but if you had one, thatmission statement would flow
logically from your core valuesand it would be transcendent of
circumstances And it would besimple and easy to remember, and
that's the key transcendent ofcircumstances.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
because, you know, no matter how much we heal in life
, no matter how much we findalignment, no matter how much we
find inner peace, circumstancesstill happen.
Speaker 2 (17:29):
Exactly, yeah, exactly.
And when those circumstanceshappen, when and it's not unlike
when I'm doing strategicplanning in an organization we
must be, we owe it to ourselvesto be aware of those
circumstances and to be able torespond to those circumstances
(17:50):
and, ideally, to prevail overthose circumstances.
Well, we do all that in thecontext of the ground we stand
on.
The ground we stand on are ourvalues and our mission, what we
stand for and our purpose.
So once we get that, that's likean anchor in the storm.
(18:11):
Those don't change, even thoughyou know all this other stuff's
going on.
And so in my work with schoolsand churches and humanitarian
organizations, there's so muchgoing on in the external
environment over which they haveno control, you know, And yet
they need to remain faithful andtrue to who they are Mission
(18:33):
driven like on task, Exactly.
And that's the same in our lives.
You know, there's so much goingon, like with your listeners.
There's so much going on intheir lives over which they have
no control.
Yes, You know, and that's okay,yes, but that they don't need
to allow that to impact theirsoul, their who they are, if
(18:59):
they're clear about it, if theyknow that's trouble.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
Yes, we've talked before on the pod about that
mindset difference.
you've referenced that kind ofdictates, the ground you stand
on right Is it?
this is happening to me, orthis is happening for me?
And that can be so toughbecause that thought and the
subsequent emotion that goeswith this is happening to me, it
just feels awful.
(19:26):
right, we've all felt thatfeeling, that thought this is
happening to me.
But what we're talking abouthere, in this sacred journey
mapping, tapping into yourvalues, your life's purpose it's
really through the lens of thisis happening for me.
My calendar has been cleared.
Yes, great intention.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
Yes, yes, and that's one of the principles.
So the system is organizedaround seven principles, and
that's one of the principles.
Is the universe desires mysuccess.
That's the whole thing.
We can feel not that way.
We can feel done unto I meanyou know we can feel, because we
(20:07):
feel hurt and in pain, in agony.
you know we can feel theuniverse is against us, hopeless
.
Speaker 1 (20:17):
Hopeless right.
If the universe is against me,I have lost hope.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
That's right, That's why hope is one of my core
values.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
Your core values And.
Speaker 2 (20:24):
I keep going back to that and say no, no, no, no, no,
It's not true, it's not capitalC.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
true, it's not a false thought.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Yeah, Yes, yes, and when you have those touchstones
to go back to, it helps put whathappens in perspective, you
know, and you get a chance tolook through that lens of
opportunity rather than despairyou know, because so much of
what happens in life can beviewed as tragic and can be
(20:55):
viewed as debilitating, and canbe viewed as you know, something
that is going to handicap ourfutures.
But if we understand what, ifwe really are clear, have
clarity and belief in our valuesand in our purpose, it can be
(21:18):
navigated.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
Everything springs from there.
Yes, 100%.
Everything can be overcome,everything can be integrated,
everything can be yeah, 100%.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
So my mission?
I told you I would share itwith you in a minute.
So my mission is I am aspiritual being whose earthly
purpose is to live aChrist-centered human adventure.
For me, the human adventure wasmy realization.
Aha, aha, the human adventure.
(21:49):
That was my big aha, becausethen everything that happens to
me I can look at through thatlens.
It's part of the adventure?
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Yeah, exactly, and man, have you been adventuring?
Speaker 2 (22:00):
I have, and I've moved like five times in the
last three years.
Yeah, I mean, it was sodifficult.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
Yeah, you've been adventuring your whole life
though love I know.
Absolutely true, yeahabsolutely true, you've traveled
and you've been doing literalmissions right.
So much yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:18):
Yeah.
So I think that gives us hopewhen we know that, ok, these
things are happening around us,but it's not going to fray the
fabric of my purpose.
In fact, it could enhance it ifwe look at it right.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
If we look at it.
So in your mission statementthat you developed about your
purpose, you have found thisfeels like a hard question
that's coming.
That that is enough specificityfor you to set goals and action
right, because to be on a humanadventure that doesn't sound
super specific to me.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Yeah, so when your mission doesn't have to be your
mission should be, if yourmission isn't overarching.
OK, yeah, mission is so.
so that's my mission, And sothere are challenges in four
areas of life.
that, in terms of sacredjourney mapping, that I found in
my discovery work in doingsacred circles getting in 2016,.
(23:18):
that, before I categorizedthese four areas, we would
attempt to surface people'sissues.
you know, issues in variousparts of life And after doing
many, many, many sacred circles,i found out that the issues
that people came up with are thechallenges were in four major
areas.
I see Self work, selfrelationships work and their
(23:44):
impact on the world.
It wouldn't impact on the world.
So self relationships work inworld.
So the specificity that you'retalking about comes in lower in
the plan itself.
So the mission is transcendentof it goes with it.
It's enduring.
It's the reason you exist.
And then you surface yourdrivers.
(24:07):
you know what your focal areasare, the things you're
passionate about, not what themain things are.
you know what you're in each ofthose four areas.
In this period of time, i wouldalways recommend that people
don't chunk out, you know.
don't be planning for 50 yearsfrom now.
It's ridiculous.
(24:27):
Think about three years, thinkabout five years.
Even three years is great.
I use three year journey mapswith people because things
change so quickly.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
I love three years.
Three years feels like notforever.
From now Exactly, feelsattainable.
Speaker 2 (24:43):
Exactly So when I thought about you know my
challenge area is when I did mymapping you solve for those
challenge areas in your visionstatement.
So your vision is what doessuccess look like?
What are you being called to?
Speaker 1 (24:59):
You know so is this like, so, your vision statement.
It's like if you were to make avision board.
Yes, it's like turning thatinto some sentences.
Yeah, one sentence, onesentence OK.
Five words OK.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
And let me, let me share it with you.
Ok, so this is my plan for 20.
So this is my sacred journeymap for 23 to 26.
My vision now.
You know my core values alreadyLove, gratitude, joy and peace.
That's, you know, piece numberone, my net.
You know my mission.
I'm a spiritual being whoseearthly purpose is to live a
Christ-centered human adventure.
(25:33):
Ok, you know my purpose rightRight Now.
What's my vision?
So, by 2026, i will be a lightbearer and a shining reflection
of Christ's present among us.
So that could be God's presence.
That could be whatever you're,whatever you know.
It could be the you know,whatever, the God of your
understanding.
(25:53):
So for me, that's what that was.
So by 2026, i will be a lightbearer and a shining reflection
of Christ's presence among us.
And so go ahead.
I was going to say so what?
how do I make that happen?
Is I have goals in each ofthose four areas.
So I have a goal in the area ofself, I have a goal in the area
(26:18):
of relationships, i have a goalin the area of work And I have
a goal in the area of.
So the goals come underneath.
Speaker 1 (26:26):
So the mission is transit.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
And the goals that I have are designed to advance
that vision.
So so my goal in the area ofself let me read it to you is by
2026, i will have sought andfound adventure and joy in the
next phase of my life.
Ok, sought and found, soughtand found.
(26:50):
And how am I going to do that?
So I'm going to take care of mysoul, i'm going to follow my
bliss And I'm going to embracehealth and lifestyle changes
that add youth and vitality.
So I have a goal in the area ofself And I have three major
pathways.
I call them promising pathways.
(27:11):
So the my success milestone inthe area of self is by 2026, i
will have sought and foundadventure and joy in the next
phase of my life.
See how that ladders up to thevision I love that.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
So now your map that you're taking us through.
It's so beautiful.
However, if someone were comingto this work from a place of
crisis, it might sound verydifferent from yours, right?
Yes?
So, for instance, let me justask some clarifying questions.
Yes, so if I'm coming from aplace of crisis post-heavours my
(27:50):
journey may involve being debtfree or owning a home, or being
done with litigation, or my kidsbeing settled in some certain
way, or these types of things,right?
Yes?
Speaker 2 (28:08):
Yes, but remember, the beauty of doing three-year
vision statements is you get tohave a new one every three years
.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
Right, i mean that's inspiring.
Yes, because we're not static,we're dynamic, we're always
changing and evolving.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
Exactly So.
you're going to put into thisyear's three-year plan those
things that you have to addressin this moment.
This three years.
yes, That's why mine sounds abit I've been doing this for a
long time.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
Gosh, it sounds beautiful, Like yes.
Speaker 2 (28:40):
But I can share with you.
I have several of secretjourney mappers that have
exactly what you have in it.
So then we would take thosepromising pathways, which are
the ways you'll reach yoursuccess milestone, and we
identify three things you'regoing to do this year for each
(29:02):
one of those, and those would bespecific things.
Like you're talking about thespecificity of it.
You get to build it into theplan, but don't build the plan
on the basis of specifics.
Build the plan on the basis of30,000 feet.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
Okay, that matters so much, And I just really want to
underscore that because rightnow I just know that for the
most part, we're painting with abroad brush right, But for the
most part, our listeners havebeen building a plan based on
the specifics and then feelinglike they're juggling too many
(29:40):
balls and pillows and I don'tknow rocks that are getting
thrown at them and then gettingsidetracked way late and feeling
like a failure.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
Yes, so easy to do when you're tied to the
specifics.
Yes, if you elevate theconversation, if you bring the
conversation up to 30,000 feet,like you're flying in a plane
and you're looking at your life30,000 feet outside.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
Strategically okay.
what strategically happened toreally get me where I want to go
?
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Yeah, and those things fall into their natural
course of importance.
Speaker 1 (30:11):
And then you have an easier time when the rocks get
thrown at you, saying likeswiping, swiping, like nope,
that's not in the story.
That's not in the strategicplan.
Not in the strategic plan.
Yes, yes, Get out of here 100%off plan, that's my phrase.
Speaker 2 (30:25):
It's off plan.
I have chills.
That's off mission.
Yeah, no, no, no, that's not away No shiny object syndrome.
Yeah, that's right, that's right.
But you only know that whenyou're you have to think big
first, yeah, and then fill inthe blanks.
I think you know it's inductiveversus deductive reasoning,
right, you start from the topand then build down, but then
(30:49):
you implement from the bottom up.
So you build it from the topdown, but you implement it from
the bottom up.
So it's big at the top, yes,and then it gets specific at the
bottom.
But if you focus on the bottom,then you're missing the top.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (31:04):
Is that making any sense?
You don't understand.
Speaker 1 (31:06):
Well, it makes so much sense to me, but also one
of my, one of my human giftingsis to be able to see the top
down and the bottom up at thesame time.
Yes, like that's just is one ofmy juiciest things I'm capable
of doing.
Speaker 2 (31:20):
Yes, Yes, absolutely, and you have and and and, to be
aware, if you don't have that,if the person doesn't have that
gift to understand that, thatyou can adapt to that.
If you think of it as a system,think of it as a system, right,
it's a continuous cycle.
So you're always.
(31:41):
you always look from the top,but you always when you're
looking from the top, you mustknow that.
you know and Peter Drucker isone of my, he's a management
guru from the Okay Century.
One of my oh my gosh.
I built my practice around hisway, his teachings.
I died at 95 and you know it'sso hysterical because in his
(32:04):
last few books people laughabout it.
In his last few books he wasunderlining and capitalizing and
bold facing.
He knew he was heading out andhe wanted to make sure that he
was getting through to peopleyou know.
And you know, one of the thingshe says is that a vision remains
only a dream until itdegenerates into work.
(32:25):
Ah, so, if you think of thevision at the top of your plan,
it remains only a dream.
So to your question about well,it sounds, really, doesn't
sound specific.
No, it isn't specific until youput teeth into it.
And so you put teeth into it.
You put teeth into it at thelowest levels, but we don't
begin by putting the teeth.
And putting teeth into what?
Speaker 1 (32:46):
Yes, you don't know what you put when you get
started Too many things at once,exactly.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
Yes, and so it's a scatter shot.
It's like you know they're notconnected, they're not knit
together.
Yes, and that's one of theadvantages of a sacred journey
map in any strategic plan,frankly, is that everything at
the bottom has to ladder up tothe top.
Speaker 1 (33:05):
That's how you create In an aligned right, Like it
has to.
Exactly Yes.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
Like a building.
Yes, a building has integritybecause things align.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
People have integrity because things align Yes, and
so so much of what our listenersare experiencing is a calendar
clearing because they were notin alignment right.
Something about that marriage,something about that life,
something about thatrelationship or how you were
showing up in it was not inalignment for you.
And it's terrifying to letthese things go because they're
(33:36):
big things and we hung our hatson them.
But the truth is we think alife of joy comes from these
certain boxes we check right,like you said, like wife, mother
, teacher, but really a life ofjoy comes from when my mind and
my heart and my soul are inalignment 100%, i'm not in
alignment anywhere and I'm goingto be on fire.
(33:57):
That's it, yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:59):
That's it in a nutshell, and that's why the
work in core values are soessential to life planning,
whether it's sacred journeymapping or anything you're doing
to think about your life.
You know because that's wherethose answers are And you search
for them like you would searchfor a precious jewel, because
when you get them, they makeeverything else make sense,
(34:19):
everything else makes sense,everything else makes sense.
And the things that arehappening you know that you have
no control over.
You can see through them andsee past them.
I know that sounds Pollyanna,but when you have these pieces
in place, you know it's just.
Speaker 1 (34:38):
It's just things get better, but it's also it's about
our focus, right, christina?
So so when we're in the pain,when we're in the, when we're in
the struggle, our focus tendsto be on the pain and on the
struggle.
What you're providing us as aframework to get our focus on
exactly what we talked about inthe beginning is when I'm at my
best.
These are my values, and whenwe switch our focus to that,
(35:01):
then all of a sudden thingsalready feel later because I'm
no longer focused on the pit,exactly.
And I'm climbing up instead ofdown.
Speaker 2 (35:12):
Exactly, exactly, and I think when you think of your
life in three year incrementsrather than 10 year increments,
who does that anymore?
I mean people you know in their, in their 20s and 30s and the
old days used to be saving forretirement, you know, or working
thinking they were going towork at the same place you know,
(35:32):
but who does that anymore?
I mean especially millennials,move around more than anyone.
We know that right.
So so, and we have to think ofour life.
If we think of our lives interms of three year increments,
we can see that we can buildtowards something, but also have
some kind of sense of beingable to manage what's happening
(35:52):
in that moment.
You know I would say about mylife.
There's a season for everythingYou know.
For me there was a season ofgrief.
It lasted a long time.
Thank you for helping me withthat.
I mean it really did, but partof I think this my whole sake.
My own sacred journey wasdiscovered when I went to Africa
(36:16):
on mission.
And really discovered, throughjust prayer and introspection,
and that the divine did not wantme to be in grief.
The divine did not.
That was not my soul's joy,that was not where my soul was
(36:38):
to be resting.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
So you were just kind of mind trapped there for mind
trapped for a while.
Speaker 2 (36:44):
I was for a long, for a long while and I just
couldn't get out of it And Ithink this whole my journey in
sacred journey mapping beganthen, when I realized it was
like, wow, this isn't me Griefwasn't me.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
No, grief was not me.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
I'm happy, joyous, peaceful person.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
I kept saying that you know, uh-huh, being able to
separate out who you are fromwhat you're thinking and feeling
and experiencing.
Yes, yes, they're separate.
they're separate.
They're overlapping, likeoverlapping, but they're not the
same, they're separate.
Speaker 2 (37:21):
And that's why I was stuck.
And when I got that, i said wow, and things began to change.
from there, i began to embracejoy and began to embrace the
parts of me that had beensubmerged, because grief was so
huge, you know, and trauma wasso huge, yes, so powerful.
And that alignment then clearsyour mind.
(37:45):
Yes, Then you can.
then, then you can see yourpurpose, and then you can dream
the dreams, and then you canplan your goal.
you know your successmilestones and your promising
pathways.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
Amazing Christina.
If someone wanted to buy yourbook or work with you or talk
with you further, say okay, okay, this is amazing ladies, but
like, how, where do I findChristina?
Tell us that, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tell us what you're up to, yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:10):
Yeah, that's excellent.
So the book Dear God, where DoI Go From Here?
A Course in Takerage?
I know it's true, dear God,where Do I Go From?
Where Do I Go?
A Course in Sacred JourneyMapping is available on Amazon
in its print version.
Awesome, we'll put that link inthe show notes, Yeah and then
(38:32):
also, i've found that people youknow, on devices, like to want
to maybe take it with them andwork on it on a device.
So there is a actually adownloadable e-book version of
it, meadow Yes, which is on,which is available on my website
, okay, yes,sacredjourneymappingcompanysite.
(38:57):
Okay, and people can go thereand get it there.
And I'm super excited about and, in fact, this week I'm signing
contract for mid summer, midweek Intensives in Maine Ooh,
sacred Journey Intensive.
(39:18):
So I'm super This is in person,in person, small, small groups,
no more than five, wow, andthese are replicating my sacred
circles that I began doing in2016 that people have just
literally It's changed theirlives.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
Yes, this is a big deal what you're talking about.
Okay, so if someone wanted toget started, they could either
download the e-book or buy thebook book, and then if they
wanted to just say, christina,just walk me through it, just
transform my life, then theycould book with you in July and
Maine, which sounds just likeamazing, like beautiful Sounds
amazing, Awesome.
Speaker 2 (39:53):
Yeah, and I'm also.
I have a curriculum in theworks for a master class, Okay
like online If people go to myInstagram, which is just at
Christina Druin, I'm going to beposting information about the
master class.
Fantastic, And people can gowith their own pace.
(40:13):
they can do it in a week.
This can be done in a weekendor it can be done over time.
It can be done over three orfour weeks, depending on your
life circumstances.
Speaker 1 (40:22):
But it doesn't have to take a long time.
It's like let's get to the meatof it.
Speaker 2 (40:27):
Let's get in there let's answer the questions and
100%, and the sacred journey,sacred circles that I began
doing in 2016 were a night, afull day and a half day, and
it's so funny because, as whenpeople were coming in and they
say this to me all the time Icame in, i knew my goals and I
just wanted you to tell me howto get to them.
(40:48):
Right, sound for a million.
Speaker 1 (40:51):
Bump the brakes, yeah , really.
Well, we like to be goodstudents and we like to be.
You know, i'm too you with that.
Speaker 2 (41:01):
I wanted to tell you, but the reality is is okay.
Okay, i hear that Let's putthat aside until we do the
working core values mission.
And to a person What theythought, what they came in
thinking they wanted to do.
Yeah, they discovered who theyreally are and what their
purpose was.
Speaker 1 (41:20):
Yeah, 180.
Yeah, oh, yeah.
And inspired, right, inspired,yeah, people leave their work
with you lighter and inspired.
Yes, Because that's whatalignment feels like.
It feels like inspiration, itfeels like joy, it feels like
lit up inside Yes, yeah And yes,and hope, yeah.
Speaker 2 (41:39):
It feels like hope, Yeah, and this hope.
We can't live without hope.
Speaker 1 (41:46):
No, no, not for long right, not for long Right.
So, christina, thank you somuch for coming on the pod and
for being with us and forsharing your light and your
mission and your vision and allthe things.
You are absolutely alightbearer, oh, thank you, And
it's such an honor to be part ofyour journey.
Speaker 2 (42:05):
Thank you.
I just thank you so much forthat.
What a joy to be here with youand all of what you're doing, So
such a full circle moment forus both.
I know right, exactly, i'msitting here like crying a
little bit.
I'm so happy Yay.
Speaker 1 (42:22):
All right.
Well, if you want to learn moreand to work with Christina.
All the information is in theshow notes.
Thank you so much for beingwith us today.
Loves Peace, thank you, thankyou, thank you, thank you, thank
you, thank you, thank you,thank you, thank you, thank you,
thank you.
Here's Diary is a podcast by MyCoach, john.
(42:43):
You can find more atmycoachjohncom uellecom.
Hi, love, this is Dawn and you're listening to
Dear Divorce Diary with my coach, dawn, where we explore the
post-divorce life and you, thewoman who lives it.
We cover everything from traumaduring and after divorce to
feeling like a stranger in yourown life and the new frontier of
life as a single woman.
We're cozy in for theconversations we've been longing
(00:26):
to have about this new life.
Hi, loves, we have such a treatfor you today.
We have an amazing guest,christina Druin, a dear friend
of mine.
We go way, way back.
Welcome, christina.
(00:47):
Thank you Great to be here,dawn.
It is such an honor to have you.
So, christina and I go back anumber of years, nearly 15 now.
I think it's wild And we metbecause you came to me for grief
counseling, which is just sucha huge part of your story and
(01:08):
probably part of the birthplaceof what we're going to talk
about today.
Yes, indeed So, so many yearslater, you've been working as a
strategic planner for nonprofitsand our listeners might think
like well, dawn, what does astrategic planner for nonprofits
have to do with divorcerecovery?
But just wait, just wait.
(01:29):
It's so good And you've createda book and a course to help
people find their strategicpersonal spiritual life plan.
Yes, exactly, and I cannot waitto unpack it all because you
(01:52):
know I heard this quote recentlythat we're over resource with
regards to information.
We are given so muchinformation about what we need
to do and what we need to healand what we need to align, but
we're under resourced around theimplementation of the
information The how in the heck,dawn and Christina, do I
(02:13):
actually do it?
And what you and I are going tounpack today is an
implementation tool of like epicproportions.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
That's a huge statement.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
Yes, let's do it, let's do it, okay.
So I'm going to start byreading this quote of yours And
then I'm going to turn it overto you a bit.
But when I first land on yourwebsite right, this is the first
sentence I read and it justgives me all the chills.
Divine alignment occurs whenthe mind finds what the soul
(02:48):
needs and the heart desires.
I'm going to read it one moretime Divine alignment occurs
when the mind finds what thesoul needs and the heart desires
.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Yes, It's powerful.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
And I know that that's what our listeners today
are searching for.
Their minds are searching forthe things that their soul needs
and their heart desires, andthey need help with the how And
here you are, yes, and we thankyou, and we begin with the soul.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
I mean, i think when we begin with the soul we think
about.
That's our essence.
You know, our definingattribute is the soul, and so
it's the soul's cry that we wantto respond to.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
The soul is Right not the mind Exactly, yes, yes.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
And I think in our world, to your point about all
the information, we tend to gothe mind, the mind, the mind.
But there's a place to startthat isn't the mind, the place
is the soul.
What is the soul's, what is thesoul need?
And the soul needs more thananything, alignment.
(04:14):
The soul needs to understandthe human Yes And what the human
values, more than anything else, because that's the definition,
that's the personality I meanwe all have.
So every soul is different,right, As every person is
different.
And every soul is differentbecause every soul is made up of
(04:37):
different ideals and differentpriorities that are given to
With our own specific purpose.
Yes, exactly, exactly, and a lotof people I know who doesn't
want to find their purpose.
Everyone's looking for their.
Well, i found in my work,whether it's schools or
individuals, and I've been doingthis process with individuals
(04:57):
since 2016.
Okay, okay, so I just Duringthe pandemic.
In fact, i just put it into abook.
I was During the pandemic.
Yeah, during the pandemic, whenall my clients I work with
schools and faith-basedorganizations Nobody was in
person, everyone was frantic.
So, rather than not do anythingin my apartment overlooking
(05:21):
fights in CrossRam, mentel,manhattan, i said I'm going to
be inspired here.
Here I am in this location,above the world in a way.
You know high up.
Let me do something with thistime.
So I use the time to marry themodel that I use in my business
practice.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
With larger organizations.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
Right, with larger organizations, with the human
beings that also could benefitfrom having their own personal
plan, and I had been doing itwith small groups since 2016,.
But with stapled workbooks.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
You know how that is.
You put it all down here, kindof winging it Exactly, and had
so and still in contact with thesacred journey mappers that
went through that process atthat time and knew that there
was something there And Ithought, okay, you know, i
always look and say, okay, ifyour calendar is being cleared,
(06:25):
what is it that the divine wantsyou to do with this time?
I mean, that's my point of view.
So my calendar was cleared, aswas the world.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
Well, sure, And you know, just to tie it together
for our listeners, when you'regoing through divorce and you're
, you've lost so much of yourtrue identity, let's call
relationship loss a calendarclearing of sorts.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Yes, exactly.
So if we look at that calendarclearing as not as a negative
discourse but as a positiveopportunity that the space has
been cleared, you know, for anew time and a new point of view
and new discovery, so I alwayslook at that time as a time to
(07:13):
go inward you know, and becauseI've had trauma in my life, as
you know, i mean the original,you know, reason we met was for
grief, counseling, the loss ofmy husband, son loss of my
husband, and that inwardperspective, that time to go
inward can be something thatthat people that can handicap
(07:39):
you and paralyze you or it canfree you And I think it depends
on your point of view.
And I think if you, when you gothrough, so there's a line in
the book about in my book DearGod, where Do I Go From Here?
That you talked about a minuteago, that says you know your
(08:03):
core values in your mission.
Don't disappear in a crisis.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
They don't, they don't, we talk about that in
psychology.
Yes, we talk about that inpsychology, that there is always
this part of self right, and inspirituality we would call it
soul, but there is a part ofself that remains unaffected by
the traumas, clear, pure,unaffected.
Yes, yes, and the more you go,covered up by all the mind noise
(08:29):
.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Exactly, and that's why I think the work that I do
with individuals taking thatmodel into the human, you know,
the circle of life it gives them.
They write it down, they writedown their core values, they put
them on their phone.
They make a rock garden, aspiritual rock.
You know core values, rockgarden, to remind them.
(08:50):
I had a person who justfinished up that chapter in the
book that talks about thespiritual, that talks about core
values, and she sent me ascreenshot of her phone
screenshot, which is core valueson rocks.
I look at this every minute,every day, so you know what we
know internally.
Such can be, can feel fleeting,can feel like a clock going by
(09:17):
until we animate it.
I think if you make it thatfeeling, if you make it an
object, if you make it, intosomething.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Yes, we talk about that all the time on the pod and
I certainly use that tool.
I have mirror messages and, yes, i use my phone screen
background And if you could seebehind my desk here, you know
all the things that are pinned,because we do need those cues,
because it is we forget.
we're human, we forget, and soyou are providing a path for us
to get clarity and then to havea way to remind ourselves.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
Yes, yes, and also then, as you said, to remind
yourself, with an inanimateobject.
I have a rock that I wrote onthat.
Turn it.
On one side it's turn it over,and on the other side it's turn
it over.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
Turn it over And I turn it over.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
I can't even tell you how many times I turn it over
Literally it's with the-.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
It creates mind-muscle connection.
Exactly.
It sounds like a silly thing,something you would think about
at the gym to create mind-muscleconnection, but that's the
value of a God box in when I wasworking the steps in Allen on
and I had a God box right Andbecause when you write it down
and you put it in the box themind is like, oh okay, I gave
(10:40):
that over.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Yes, right.
And then if you can take thatfurther and turn it into a rule
of life in spirituality whetherit's meditation or whether it's
something, a place you go everysingle day, whether it's
journaling you know this fromyour work that you make it, that
you ritualize it then that corevalue that defines you- Has a
(11:07):
place to be expressed.
Absolutely, captain toAbsolutely, and then, once you
get your core values in place,which I think it's people.
When I first did this work,when I first did the
self-discovery work, i actuallythought my values were not were
different.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
But when I went, in and Like you thought it was one
thing and it turned out to beYeah.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
I mean I thought freedom was a huge value of mine
.
I thought independence becauseI'm a so independent woman I
mean I have been ever, foreverAnd I thought, you know, and
independence qualifies as avalue, freedom qualifies as a
value.
Values are nouns, they're notoutcomes.
You know they are they have inand of themselves intrinsic
(11:57):
worth And we all have what Icall a constellation of values
that make up our beings And wemake our decisions on the basis
of those values every day.
But there are only a very fewthat are, if you think of your
constellation, if you think of aconstellation, there are very
(12:17):
few that are the sun They giveyou that light and life Other
circle around you.
They'll be in those you know,like Pluto and Mars.
If Pluto was still a planet.
I don't see that.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
So are you teaching us that your process, your book
and your course teaches us?
to be able to tease out thedifference between our core
values and our beliefs, like,because a belief is just a
thought that we've thought anumber of times.
Right, and for many of us hereon the pod, independence is
actually a sign of trauma, right, it's that over-independent way
(12:50):
is actually from having beentoo resilient for too long.
Right, it's actually a traumasymptom typically.
So you're helping us, throughyour work, tease out What is
actually a core value from whatmaybe might be like a low-key,
hidden, negative belief orlimiting belief.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Yes, yes, and I mean values are defined you at your
best.
So, when you are at your best,what are the ideals that define
you?
So for me, those ideals arehope, joy, love, peace.
I see Gratitude, yes.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
They define you at your best.
And that is so powerful,Christina, because in this now
moment, our listeners are notfeeling their best And we get
bogged down in that right, Weget lost in the heaviness of it
and we lose track.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Yes, yes, But when you get, when that?
but that's your soul, that'sthe fabric of your soul.
Is you at your best?
Yes, That's your soul, is yourbest right?
So if you can get in touch withthose things to find you And
for me those things were, it wasdiscovery And then they, they
(14:13):
then, and this is where, to me,the power of this practice is in
connecting these values thatyou discover And you can only
discern them, and they're yoursand they're indefensible.
You don't have to defend themto anybody.
You know they are what is truefor you.
(14:34):
They define the heart and thesoul of the matter for you when
you are at your best and to dothat work, to get in touch with
those no more than five causeothers will be the constant.
So the more core values thatyou introduce into your system,
the more you introduce theopportunity to conflict, because
(14:55):
you make your decision on thebasis of your core values,
uh-huh uh-huh If you have 20core values you can't make
everybody happy all the time.
Exactly.
So you want to define thosevery few, up to five, which is
the five I gave you were mine.
Okay, So once you get those inplace, then those and connect to
(15:16):
your purpose, your life purpose, your mission, why you exist.
So, core values answer thequestion what do I stand for?
Mission answers the questionwhy do I exist?
So how do you know why youexist until you know?
Speaker 1 (15:32):
what you stand for.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
When you get the, what youstand for, in place, then all
the things, all the reasons youthink you may exist, whether
it's to do this activity or thatactivity or be a teacher, I
mean I write in the book.
How you know, until I did thiswork, I, you know, I thought my
(15:55):
purpose was to be.
I always wanted to be a teacher, my whole life, since I was a
little kid, right, Uh-huh.
But when I stopped teaching didI lose my life purpose?
Speaker 1 (16:04):
No.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
You know, I always, I always-.
No, because that's a role.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
Exactly A role We are , not our roles.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
Exactly, i always wanted to be a wife and a mother
.
When my husband died, mm-hmm.
There went that role yeah,exactly, that wasn't my purpose.
Purpose, you know, purpose, istranscendent of all that.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
What you are talking about right now is such a big
deal.
I think so.
Our roles are not our purpose.
They can be part of it, right,they can be an expression of Yes
, but they are not one and thesame.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
Exactly And that when you get that and you I don't
think you can get that,personally I don't think you can
get that until you're in touchwith your values, you have to do
that preliminary work.
When you do that, then the testof a mission statement, and
everyone could have one.
You know if you have and I'llshare mine with you in a minute,
(17:01):
but if you had one, thatmission statement would flow
logically from your core valuesand it would be transcendent of
circumstances And it would besimple and easy to remember, and
that's the key transcendent ofcircumstances.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
because, you know, no matter how much we heal in life
, no matter how much we findalignment, no matter how much we
find inner peace, circumstancesstill happen.
Speaker 2 (17:29):
Exactly, yeah, exactly.
And when those circumstanceshappen, when and it's not unlike
when I'm doing strategicplanning in an organization we
must be, we owe it to ourselvesto be aware of those
circumstances and to be able torespond to those circumstances
(17:50):
and, ideally, to prevail overthose circumstances.
Well, we do all that in thecontext of the ground we stand
on.
The ground we stand on are ourvalues and our mission, what we
stand for and our purpose.
So once we get that, that's likean anchor in the storm.
(18:11):
Those don't change, even thoughyou know all this other stuff's
going on.
And so in my work with schoolsand churches and humanitarian
organizations, there's so muchgoing on in the external
environment over which they haveno control, you know, And yet
they need to remain faithful andtrue to who they are Mission
(18:33):
driven like on task, Exactly.
And that's the same in our lives.
You know, there's so much goingon, like with your listeners.
There's so much going on intheir lives over which they have
no control.
Yes, You know, and that's okay,yes, but that they don't need
to allow that to impact theirsoul, their who they are, if
(18:59):
they're clear about it, if theyknow that's trouble.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
Yes, we've talked before on the pod about that
mindset difference.
you've referenced that kind ofdictates, the ground you stand
on right Is it?
this is happening to me, orthis is happening for me?
And that can be so toughbecause that thought and the
subsequent emotion that goeswith this is happening to me, it
just feels awful.
(19:26):
right, we've all felt thatfeeling, that thought this is
happening to me.
But what we're talking abouthere, in this sacred journey
mapping, tapping into yourvalues, your life's purpose it's
really through the lens of thisis happening for me.
My calendar has been cleared.
Yes, great intention.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
Yes, yes, and that's one of the principles.
So the system is organizedaround seven principles, and
that's one of the principles.
Is the universe desires mysuccess.
That's the whole thing.
We can feel not that way.
We can feel done unto I meanyou know we can feel, because we
(20:07):
feel hurt and in pain, in agony.
you know we can feel theuniverse is against us, hopeless
.
Speaker 1 (20:17):
Hopeless right.
If the universe is against me,I have lost hope.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
That's right, That's why hope is one of my core
values.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
Your core values And.
Speaker 2 (20:24):
I keep going back to that and say no, no, no, no, no,
It's not true, it's not capitalC.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
true, it's not a false thought.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Yeah, Yes, yes, and when you have those touchstones
to go back to, it helps put whathappens in perspective, you
know, and you get a chance tolook through that lens of
opportunity rather than despairyou know, because so much of
what happens in life can beviewed as tragic and can be
(20:55):
viewed as debilitating, and canbe viewed as you know, something
that is going to handicap ourfutures.
But if we understand what, ifwe really are clear, have
clarity and belief in our valuesand in our purpose, it can be
(21:18):
navigated.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
Everything springs from there.
Yes, 100%.
Everything can be overcome,everything can be integrated,
everything can be yeah, 100%.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
So my mission?
I told you I would share itwith you in a minute.
So my mission is I am aspiritual being whose earthly
purpose is to live aChrist-centered human adventure.
For me, the human adventure wasmy realization.
Aha, aha, the human adventure.
(21:49):
That was my big aha, becausethen everything that happens to
me I can look at through thatlens.
It's part of the adventure?
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Yeah, exactly, and man, have you been adventuring?
Speaker 2 (22:00):
I have, and I've moved like five times in the
last three years.
Yeah, I mean, it was sodifficult.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
Yeah, you've been adventuring your whole life
though love I know.
Absolutely true, yeahabsolutely true, you've traveled
and you've been doing literalmissions right.
So much yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:18):
Yeah.
So I think that gives us hopewhen we know that, ok, these
things are happening around us,but it's not going to fray the
fabric of my purpose.
In fact, it could enhance it ifwe look at it right.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
If we look at it.
So in your mission statementthat you developed about your
purpose, you have found thisfeels like a hard question
that's coming.
That that is enough specificityfor you to set goals and action
right, because to be on a humanadventure that doesn't sound
super specific to me.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Yeah, so when your mission doesn't have to be your
mission should be, if yourmission isn't overarching.
OK, yeah, mission is so.
so that's my mission, And sothere are challenges in four
areas of life.
that, in terms of sacredjourney mapping, that I found in
my discovery work in doingsacred circles getting in 2016,.
(23:18):
that, before I categorizedthese four areas, we would
attempt to surface people'sissues.
you know, issues in variousparts of life And after doing
many, many, many sacred circles,i found out that the issues
that people came up with are thechallenges were in four major
areas.
I see Self work, selfrelationships work and their
(23:44):
impact on the world.
It wouldn't impact on the world.
So self relationships work inworld.
So the specificity that you'retalking about comes in lower in
the plan itself.
So the mission is transcendentof it goes with it.
It's enduring.
It's the reason you exist.
And then you surface yourdrivers.
(24:07):
you know what your focal areasare, the things you're
passionate about, not what themain things are.
you know what you're in each ofthose four areas.
In this period of time, i wouldalways recommend that people
don't chunk out, you know.
don't be planning for 50 yearsfrom now.
It's ridiculous.
(24:27):
Think about three years, thinkabout five years.
Even three years is great.
I use three year journey mapswith people because things
change so quickly.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
I love three years.
Three years feels like notforever.
From now Exactly, feelsattainable.
Speaker 2 (24:43):
Exactly So when I thought about you know my
challenge area is when I did mymapping you solve for those
challenge areas in your visionstatement.
So your vision is what doessuccess look like?
What are you being called to?
Speaker 1 (24:59):
You know so is this like, so, your vision statement.
It's like if you were to make avision board.
Yes, it's like turning thatinto some sentences.
Yeah, one sentence, onesentence OK.
Five words OK.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
And let me, let me share it with you.
Ok, so this is my plan for 20.
So this is my sacred journeymap for 23 to 26.
My vision now.
You know my core values alreadyLove, gratitude, joy and peace.
That's, you know, piece numberone, my net.
You know my mission.
I'm a spiritual being whoseearthly purpose is to live a
Christ-centered human adventure.
(25:33):
Ok, you know my purpose rightRight Now.
What's my vision?
So, by 2026, i will be a lightbearer and a shining reflection
of Christ's present among us.
So that could be God's presence.
That could be whatever you're,whatever you know.
It could be the you know,whatever, the God of your
understanding.
(25:53):
So for me, that's what that was.
So by 2026, i will be a lightbearer and a shining reflection
of Christ's presence among us.
And so go ahead.
I was going to say so what?
how do I make that happen?
Is I have goals in each ofthose four areas.
So I have a goal in the area ofself, I have a goal in the area
(26:18):
of relationships, i have a goalin the area of work And I have
a goal in the area of.
So the goals come underneath.
Speaker 1 (26:26):
So the mission is transit.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
And the goals that I have are designed to advance
that vision.
So so my goal in the area ofself let me read it to you is by
2026, i will have sought andfound adventure and joy in the
next phase of my life.
Ok, sought and found, soughtand found.
(26:50):
And how am I going to do that?
So I'm going to take care of mysoul, i'm going to follow my
bliss And I'm going to embracehealth and lifestyle changes
that add youth and vitality.
So I have a goal in the area ofself And I have three major
pathways.
I call them promising pathways.
(27:11):
So the my success milestone inthe area of self is by 2026, i
will have sought and foundadventure and joy in the next
phase of my life.
See how that ladders up to thevision I love that.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
So now your map that you're taking us through.
It's so beautiful.
However, if someone were comingto this work from a place of
crisis, it might sound verydifferent from yours, right?
Yes?
So, for instance, let me justask some clarifying questions.
Yes, so if I'm coming from aplace of crisis post-heavours my
(27:50):
journey may involve being debtfree or owning a home, or being
done with litigation, or my kidsbeing settled in some certain
way, or these types of things,right?
Yes?
Speaker 2 (28:08):
Yes, but remember, the beauty of doing three-year
vision statements is you get tohave a new one every three years
.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
Right, i mean that's inspiring.
Yes, because we're not static,we're dynamic, we're always
changing and evolving.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
Exactly So.
you're going to put into thisyear's three-year plan those
things that you have to addressin this moment.
This three years.
yes, That's why mine sounds abit I've been doing this for a
long time.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
Gosh, it sounds beautiful, Like yes.
Speaker 2 (28:40):
But I can share with you.
I have several of secretjourney mappers that have
exactly what you have in it.
So then we would take thosepromising pathways, which are
the ways you'll reach yoursuccess milestone, and we
identify three things you'regoing to do this year for each
(29:02):
one of those, and those would bespecific things.
Like you're talking about thespecificity of it.
You get to build it into theplan, but don't build the plan
on the basis of specifics.
Build the plan on the basis of30,000 feet.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
Okay, that matters so much, And I just really want to
underscore that because rightnow I just know that for the
most part, we're painting with abroad brush right, But for the
most part, our listeners havebeen building a plan based on
the specifics and then feelinglike they're juggling too many
(29:40):
balls and pillows and I don'tknow rocks that are getting
thrown at them and then gettingsidetracked way late and feeling
like a failure.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
Yes, so easy to do when you're tied to the
specifics.
Yes, if you elevate theconversation, if you bring the
conversation up to 30,000 feet,like you're flying in a plane
and you're looking at your life30,000 feet outside.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
Strategically okay.
what strategically happened toreally get me where I want to go
?
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Yeah, and those things fall into their natural
course of importance.
Speaker 1 (30:11):
And then you have an easier time when the rocks get
thrown at you, saying likeswiping, swiping, like nope,
that's not in the story.
That's not in the strategicplan.
Not in the strategic plan.
Yes, yes, Get out of here 100%off plan, that's my phrase.
Speaker 2 (30:25):
It's off plan.
I have chills.
That's off mission.
Yeah, no, no, no, that's not away No shiny object syndrome.
Yeah, that's right, that's right.
But you only know that whenyou're you have to think big
first, yeah, and then fill inthe blanks.
I think you know it's inductiveversus deductive reasoning,
right, you start from the topand then build down, but then
(30:49):
you implement from the bottom up.
So you build it from the topdown, but you implement it from
the bottom up.
So it's big at the top, yes,and then it gets specific at the
bottom.
But if you focus on the bottom,then you're missing the top.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (31:04):
Is that making any sense?
You don't understand.
Speaker 1 (31:06):
Well, it makes so much sense to me, but also one
of my, one of my human giftingsis to be able to see the top
down and the bottom up at thesame time.
Yes, like that's just is one ofmy juiciest things I'm capable
of doing.
Speaker 2 (31:20):
Yes, Yes, absolutely, and you have and and and, to be
aware, if you don't have that,if the person doesn't have that
gift to understand that, thatyou can adapt to that.
If you think of it as a system,think of it as a system, right,
it's a continuous cycle.
So you're always.
(31:41):
you always look from the top,but you always when you're
looking from the top, you mustknow that.
you know and Peter Drucker isone of my, he's a management
guru from the Okay Century.
One of my oh my gosh.
I built my practice around hisway, his teachings.
I died at 95 and you know it'sso hysterical because in his
(32:04):
last few books people laughabout it.
In his last few books he wasunderlining and capitalizing and
bold facing.
He knew he was heading out andhe wanted to make sure that he
was getting through to peopleyou know.
And you know, one of the thingshe says is that a vision remains
only a dream until itdegenerates into work.
(32:25):
Ah, so, if you think of thevision at the top of your plan,
it remains only a dream.
So to your question about well,it sounds, really, doesn't
sound specific.
No, it isn't specific until youput teeth into it.
And so you put teeth into it.
You put teeth into it at thelowest levels, but we don't
begin by putting the teeth.
And putting teeth into what?
Speaker 1 (32:46):
Yes, you don't know what you put when you get
started Too many things at once,exactly.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
Yes, and so it's a scatter shot.
It's like you know they're notconnected, they're not knit
together.
Yes, and that's one of theadvantages of a sacred journey
map in any strategic plan,frankly, is that everything at
the bottom has to ladder up tothe top.
Speaker 1 (33:05):
That's how you create In an aligned right, Like it
has to.
Exactly Yes.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
Like a building.
Yes, a building has integritybecause things align.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
People have integrity because things align Yes, and
so so much of what our listenersare experiencing is a calendar
clearing because they were notin alignment right.
Something about that marriage,something about that life,
something about thatrelationship or how you were
showing up in it was not inalignment for you.
And it's terrifying to letthese things go because they're
(33:36):
big things and we hung our hatson them.
But the truth is we think alife of joy comes from these
certain boxes we check right,like you said, like wife, mother
, teacher, but really a life ofjoy comes from when my mind and
my heart and my soul are inalignment 100%, i'm not in
alignment anywhere and I'm goingto be on fire.
(33:57):
That's it, yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:59):
That's it in a nutshell, and that's why the
work in core values are soessential to life planning,
whether it's sacred journeymapping or anything you're doing
to think about your life.
You know because that's wherethose answers are And you search
for them like you would searchfor a precious jewel, because
when you get them, they makeeverything else make sense,
(34:19):
everything else makes sense,everything else makes sense.
And the things that arehappening you know that you have
no control over.
You can see through them andsee past them.
I know that sounds Pollyanna,but when you have these pieces
in place, you know it's just.
Speaker 1 (34:38):
It's just things get better, but it's also it's about
our focus, right, christina?
So so when we're in the pain,when we're in the, when we're in
the struggle, our focus tendsto be on the pain and on the
struggle.
What you're providing us as aframework to get our focus on
exactly what we talked about inthe beginning is when I'm at my
best.
These are my values, and whenwe switch our focus to that,
(35:01):
then all of a sudden thingsalready feel later because I'm
no longer focused on the pit,exactly.
And I'm climbing up instead ofdown.
Speaker 2 (35:12):
Exactly, exactly, and I think when you think of your
life in three year incrementsrather than 10 year increments,
who does that anymore?
I mean people you know in their, in their 20s and 30s and the
old days used to be saving forretirement, you know, or working
thinking they were going towork at the same place you know,
(35:32):
but who does that anymore?
I mean especially millennials,move around more than anyone.
We know that right.
So so, and we have to think ofour life.
If we think of our lives interms of three year increments,
we can see that we can buildtowards something, but also have
some kind of sense of beingable to manage what's happening
(35:52):
in that moment.
You know I would say about mylife.
There's a season for everythingYou know.
For me there was a season ofgrief.
It lasted a long time.
Thank you for helping me withthat.
I mean it really did, but partof I think this my whole sake.
My own sacred journey wasdiscovered when I went to Africa
(36:16):
on mission.
And really discovered, throughjust prayer and introspection,
and that the divine did not wantme to be in grief.
The divine did not.
That was not my soul's joy,that was not where my soul was
(36:38):
to be resting.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
So you were just kind of mind trapped there for mind
trapped for a while.
Speaker 2 (36:44):
I was for a long, for a long while and I just
couldn't get out of it And Ithink this whole my journey in
sacred journey mapping beganthen, when I realized it was
like, wow, this isn't me Griefwasn't me.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
No, grief was not me.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
I'm happy, joyous, peaceful person.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
I kept saying that you know, uh-huh, being able to
separate out who you are fromwhat you're thinking and feeling
and experiencing.
Yes, yes, they're separate.
they're separate.
They're overlapping, likeoverlapping, but they're not the
same, they're separate.
Speaker 2 (37:21):
And that's why I was stuck.
And when I got that, i said wow, and things began to change.
from there, i began to embracejoy and began to embrace the
parts of me that had beensubmerged, because grief was so
huge, you know, and trauma wasso huge, yes, so powerful.
And that alignment then clearsyour mind.
(37:45):
Yes, Then you can.
then, then you can see yourpurpose, and then you can dream
the dreams, and then you canplan your goal.
you know your successmilestones and your promising
pathways.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
Amazing Christina.
If someone wanted to buy yourbook or work with you or talk
with you further, say okay, okay, this is amazing ladies, but
like, how, where do I findChristina?
Tell us that, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tell us what you're up to, yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:10):
Yeah, that's excellent.
So the book Dear God, where DoI Go From Here?
A Course in Takerage?
I know it's true, dear God,where Do I Go From?
Where Do I Go?
A Course in Sacred JourneyMapping is available on Amazon
in its print version.
Awesome, we'll put that link inthe show notes, Yeah and then
(38:32):
also, i've found that people youknow, on devices, like to want
to maybe take it with them andwork on it on a device.
So there is a actually adownloadable e-book version of
it, meadow Yes, which is on,which is available on my website
, okay, yes,sacredjourneymappingcompanysite.
(38:57):
Okay, and people can go thereand get it there.
And I'm super excited about and, in fact, this week I'm signing
contract for mid summer, midweek Intensives in Maine Ooh,
sacred Journey Intensive.
(39:18):
So I'm super This is in person,in person, small, small groups,
no more than five, wow, andthese are replicating my sacred
circles that I began doing in2016 that people have just
literally It's changed theirlives.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
Yes, this is a big deal what you're talking about.
Okay, so if someone wanted toget started, they could either
download the e-book or buy thebook book, and then if they
wanted to just say, christina,just walk me through it, just
transform my life, then theycould book with you in July and
Maine, which sounds just likeamazing, like beautiful Sounds
amazing, Awesome.
Speaker 2 (39:53):
Yeah, and I'm also.
I have a curriculum in theworks for a master class, Okay
like online If people go to myInstagram, which is just at
Christina Druin, I'm going to beposting information about the
master class.
Fantastic, And people can gowith their own pace.
(40:13):
they can do it in a week.
This can be done in a weekendor it can be done over time.
It can be done over three orfour weeks, depending on your
life circumstances.
Speaker 1 (40:22):
But it doesn't have to take a long time.
It's like let's get to the meatof it.
Speaker 2 (40:27):
Let's get in there let's answer the questions and
100%, and the sacred journey,sacred circles that I began
doing in 2016 were a night, afull day and a half day, and
it's so funny because, as whenpeople were coming in and they
say this to me all the time Icame in, i knew my goals and I
just wanted you to tell me howto get to them.
(40:48):
Right, sound for a million.
Speaker 1 (40:51):
Bump the brakes, yeah , really.
Well, we like to be goodstudents and we like to be.
You know, i'm too you with that.
Speaker 2 (41:01):
I wanted to tell you, but the reality is is okay.
Okay, i hear that Let's putthat aside until we do the
working core values mission.
And to a person What theythought, what they came in
thinking they wanted to do.
Yeah, they discovered who theyreally are and what their
purpose was.
Speaker 1 (41:20):
Yeah, 180.
Yeah, oh, yeah.
And inspired, right, inspired,yeah, people leave their work
with you lighter and inspired.
Yes, Because that's whatalignment feels like.
It feels like inspiration, itfeels like joy, it feels like
lit up inside Yes, yeah And yes,and hope, yeah.
Speaker 2 (41:39):
It feels like hope, Yeah, and this hope.
We can't live without hope.
Speaker 1 (41:46):
No, no, not for long right, not for long Right.
So, christina, thank you somuch for coming on the pod and
for being with us and forsharing your light and your
mission and your vision and allthe things.
You are absolutely alightbearer, oh, thank you, And
it's such an honor to be part ofyour journey.
Speaker 2 (42:05):
Thank you.
I just thank you so much forthat.
What a joy to be here with youand all of what you're doing, So
such a full circle moment forus both.
I know right, exactly, i'msitting here like crying a
little bit.
I'm so happy Yay.
Speaker 1 (42:22):
All right.
Well, if you want to learn moreand to work with Christina.
All the information is in theshow notes.
Thank you so much for beingwith us today.
Loves Peace, thank you, thankyou, thank you, thank you, thank
you, thank you, thank you,thank you, thank you, thank you,
thank you.
Here's Diary is a podcast by MyCoach, john.
(42:43):
You can find more atmycoachjohncom uellecom.
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