Control Freak?

Send Carla a message!

A deep change in the way that we live requires a deep change in the way that we think—especially when it comes to what we try to control.

When uncertainty creeps in and the ground beneath us feels shaky, our instinct is to grasp for control over external circumstances and other people's behaviors. We believe that if we can just perfect our environment or achieve that next milestone, inner peace will follow. Yet this approach rarely delivers the stability we seek.

Let's explore a different approach.  Instead of tightening your grip on what you can't control, redirect your energy toward something within your reach. This small but powerful shift can change everything about how you move through the world.

Enjoy!

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Website: https:/www.carlareeves.com/
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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
A deep change in the way that we live requires a deep
change in the way that we think.
I'm Karla Reeves and this isDifferently.
I was in Pilates last week witha new instructor and she used a
word that popped out like neoncolors to me.

(00:20):
She said Contrology.
Have you ever heard of thatword?
I hadn't.
I went home and quickly lookedit up, but it's the original
name that Joseph Pilates gavethis method, long before it was
called Pilates.
So I looked it up and I knew Iwanted to share it with you.

(00:41):
Contrology means the art ofcontrol.
The practice was never aboutrandom exercise.
It was about intentionally,consciously guiding movement
with precision, focus and breath.
And as I sat there looking atthis, I thought about how often
I and my clients can slip intobeing a control freak in our

(01:04):
lives.
You know the moments.
It's when things feel uncertainor fearful, or when the ground
beneath us feels a little shakyand we find ourselves wanting to
cling or grasp or trying tocontrol anything we can, or when
we just want to feel better andwe have that illusion and think
that if we can just line thingsup on the outside, just so, if

(01:28):
we can achieve that next thingor if we can control or change
the people in our life, thenwe're going to feel better.
But that doesn't always go sowell.
So often, when we try tocontrol the things that are
outside of our reach or outsideof our domain of responsibility
circumstances, other people'sbehavior and so on it doesn't

(01:49):
create the change or tractionthat we actually want.
The word contrology reminded methat control isn't bad.
It's just about what we chooseto control.
I want to give you some thingsto think about.
What if, instead of clinging tocircumstances or people this
week, you cling to the thingsthat are already within your

(02:11):
reach and within your domain ofresponsibility?
Just like with contrology andexercise, we can control the
precision and the focus and thealignment of our thoughts, our
words, our choices in that nextmoment or relationship or
meeting we have today.

(02:31):
And with practice we can builda lean and balanced and strong
mind and heart to move throughthe things we're moving through
in this life.
What if, instead of clinging tothose things, we default to?
What if, this week, you look tothings like your breath, the

(02:52):
way you speak to yourself, thethoughts you give weight to, or
that you stir and stir and stirin your mind, the posture you
take in your body, in your heartand in your mind to approach
whatever it is that's on yourplate today.
Maybe it's controlling whetheryou pick up that pen and write
and get out the swirlingnegativity in your head.

(03:14):
These are the things that trulystudy us.
Is when we go inside and studythe things that are within our
control that's what actuallycreates peace and clarity and
momentum.
For me, writing is an evenanother way of exercising
contrology.
When life feels wild and Ican't control what the world is

(03:38):
throwing at me, I can sit downwith a page and breathe and
choose what to do with mythoughts.
That small act changeseverything about how I move back
into the world.
If you're feeling shaky, ifyou're feeling fearful, instead
of gripping tighter on thethings you can't control, what

(03:59):
if you tried practicing a littlecontrology in your own way?
Maybe it's through mindfulmovement, maybe it's through
writing, maybe it's just pausingto breathe, maybe it's taking
more breaks in your day so thatyou have more energy and focus
and intention to bring to whatyou're doing.
Ask yourself, where in my lifeam I trying to control what

(04:23):
isn't mine and what's one placewithin my reach that I could
hold on to.
Instead, I would love to hearwhat comes up for you.
You can hit that button thatsays send Carla a message.
It's right on your podcastplayer.
Share a takeaway, a thought oreven a story from your own life.

(04:43):
Thank you so much for beinghere.
It means the world to walkalongside you and bring these
ideas to you.
And lastly, if you're cravingconversation and connection the
kind that fuels your life,brings you together with others
and helps you stretch outsidethe mental noise in your head,
come join my next free class.

(05:04):
Each month, we're gathering towrite, to have meaningful
dialogue and to share tools withyou that can make a difference
in your life.
It's not about adding morenoise.
It's about creating space inyour life to manage your mind.
Expand your perspective so thatyou can align your actions.
Save your spot atCarlaReevescom forward slash

(05:26):
free class.
I'll see you next week.
Thank you for tuning into thisepisode of differently.
Hey, if you're ready to stopcircling the same thoughts and
start creating real momentum,check out my coaching
experiences.
There's a 12 week experiencefor a big shift or there's a

(05:49):
monthly writing and coachingpartnership for ongoing clarity,
creativity, alignment andmomentum.
You can find all the details atCarla Reevescom and if you
enjoyed this episode, pleasehelp me grow the podcast and
leave a five-star review onApple podcasts and share with
someone you love.

(06:10):
Until next time, stop survivingyour life, start creating it.