November 6, 2025 • 50 mins
Take a front-row seat in our Differently Mastermind. Enjoy this unscripted conversation about the book, The Go-Giver by Bob Burg & John David Mann and how shifting from striving to serving is changing the way we do business and life.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_03 (00:00):
A deep change in the way that we live requires a deep
change in the way that we think.
I'm Carla Reeves, and this isDifferently.
Today we're doing somethingdifferent.
I want to invite you into ourmastermind.
Um, gosh, we've been doing thismastermind.
(00:22):
I has it been a couple years,you guys, almost something
around there.
Let me see your yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (00:29):
20 looks like uh number one call was November 3rd
of 2023.
SPEAKER_03 (00:35):
It's been two years.
No, it's been two years.
Oh, this is perfect.
So we're celebrating ouranniversary.
Happy anniversary.
Happy anniversary.
So about two years ago, Iinvited my guests here today to
do a mastermind.
We didn't really know what wewere creating, but it's not an
(00:56):
ordinary mastermind.
And every time I feel like it'sa little bit different, but it's
always conversation that fuelsour um our lives, our business.
We talk all kinds of things.
We talk business, we talk life,we talk dreams and adventure,
um, and we read books together.
(01:17):
And today we thought it would bereally fun to bring you into the
conversation.
We just finished the book calledThe Go Giver.
And we just want to we just wantto share what we're getting from
this today.
And so we're just gonna bringyou into our last conversation
about the book um and the fivestratosphere stratospheric laws
of success.
So we read the Go Giver.
(01:38):
Um, gosh, I don't even have itin front of me to say the
authors.
Do one of you have the authors?
SPEAKER_01 (01:44):
Bob Berg and John David Mann.
SPEAKER_03 (01:47):
Yes.
So good.
So I have Kelly Marshall and BobParsons here, and they have both
been on the podcast at leastonce before.
Um, so Kelly, why don't youstart by just giving us a little
introduction about you and whatyou do and kind of maybe your
the season of your business?
(02:08):
Okay.
SPEAKER_02 (02:10):
Um, so uh yeah, I'm Kelly Marshall.
I'm in Buffalo, New York, andI'm really passionate about um
working with consciouscompanies, purpose-driven
people, and um working with themon money.
And I really want to help themmake more money and keep more of
their money and really feel goodabout kind of that flow of money
(02:30):
in their lives and theirbusiness.
Um and I now have a team of nineum that help me.
And we provide bookkeepingservices and financial coaching
um to conscious business owners,conscious entrepreneurs.
Sometimes they have a teamthemselves, sometimes it's just
um solopreneurs.
SPEAKER_03 (02:51):
Yay! And Kelly has been my bookkeeper for for
years.
I don't even know how manypeople.
And you were one of my first.
Yes.
So awesome.
So excited.
Um, okay, Bob, how about you?
SPEAKER_01 (03:04):
Okay, first I have to correct.
Um, I think our first mastermindwas like May, April or May of
2024.
Okay.
I was looking at our firstcoaching meeting with Carla, who
was my coach who helped me getstarted uh with my business.
So I'm an executive coach.
I work with mid-level leadersand above.
(03:24):
I do mainly one-on-one, and Ilove I help people move from
great to extraordinary throughcoaching and conversations.
And I do see keynotes, I do somepublic speaking, I do some work
custom workshops, but everythingI do is custom for leaders and
their teams.
And Carl, like I said, Carla wasum instrumental in getting my
(03:47):
mind sorted out.
I'll call a lot of mind trafficaround going on my own and
leaving corporate.
And then Kelly has just beenthis super transparent, amazing,
open person on our mastermind.
That every time I get on a callwith you all, I like, oh my
gosh, I tell my wife, you got tohear what we talked about today.
SPEAKER_02 (04:07):
Oh, it's so I always I credit you and Carla for
asking the best questions I'veever been asked.
So I think you guys have a wayof of supporting us to draw out
that conversation that's justreally powerful.
SPEAKER_03 (04:20):
Yeah, not everybody's here today, but like
it's just been so good.
We were talking this morningjust as we started.
Like, just we when we started,we all felt like a little bit
alone as entrepreneurs and on anisland kind of operating, and
these conversations have justbeen so life-giving.
Um okay, so the go-giver.
(04:41):
Um, we've all just been wowed bythis book.
I I had read it before and readit a second time and was equally
as wowed, if not more.
But let's just kind of startlike, so we finished it.
Like, what what was kind of whatwas striking you as you finished
it?
Like what was standing out toyou the most just as you read
(05:02):
this book, kind of from ahigh-level perspective.
And Kelly, I know you had likemind-blowing insights that first
call.
SPEAKER_02 (05:11):
I think we were supposed to read the first three
chapters.
So I just want to say too, I wastold to read this book when I
first started my business,probably in this version of the
business started in 2018.
Um, and I was told to read thebook then, and I remember being
like, oh yeah, and I probablyeven ordered it, couldn't find
that copy when it was our timeto read it.
But um I never did, and I justthink I wasn't ready yet at that
(05:34):
time, and that you know, I'vedone a lot of work and kind of
the energy of money and law ofattraction, and and so many
other books that I've read inthat world, but this was so
different and so practical, andI was just inspired by every
page.
And um, so we read the firstthree chapters, and I came back
and I'm like, guys, like my mindis blown right now.
(05:56):
And then we decided coming outof your skin.
Like, it was so cool.
Well, and and um, I don't knowif I should share that part now,
but I was inspired.
I literally with that morning,and you with the help of um Chat
GPT, reenvisioned um a big partof my business, but also of um
my Facebook group, which I hadbeen like trying to find an
(06:19):
answer to like how to serve inthere in a new way.
It had gone kind of dormant.
I had shifted some things.
It it started out of is actuallya book club and a really
supportive, lovely space, andand it grew with some incredible
people.
And I always loved everybody inthere, and I used to show up
once a week for training andlike to provide a training
(06:40):
video.
And at some point it just umfizzled out a little bit for me.
And I but I I still wanted to bein there and providing value and
loving on the group, but Icouldn't find a way.
I mean, literally, probably fortwo years I've been searching
for this and it and afterreading, I don't did I finish
the book by the time I did that.
I don't think I finished maybe Ihave I don't think you had.
(07:01):
I don't think I'd finished it.
And I started this umbrainstorming with ChatGPT about
how to create a group usingthose principles, and it blew me
away and it was everything Iwanted.
And we've implemented that sincethen.
So our last call was probablythree weeks ago, and we already
have it in place in the group,and it's the changes are
happening, and it's um it justwas so aligned and so authentic
(07:22):
and just felt so good.
So that was what inspired me todo, and then I devoured the rest
of the book in between like whenwe decided we were gonna finish
it for our next meeting.
I read it that day.
Um it's it's just so good andit's so aligned for people that
like everybody in our littlemastermind is purpose-driven.
We care about the value we'redelivering, we care about the
(07:44):
people we're working with, wecare about the world.
Um, and this just gave me aformula to be able to be me and
and do work the purpose of myheart, but do it in a way that
also was really good for my teamand my business and my clients.
And yeah, it just felt good.
That's so beautiful, Kelly.
SPEAKER_03 (08:04):
So I want to make sure, is that a it can any is
that an open community?
Like we can put the link in theshow notes.
Okay, so make sure you sendthat.
And if you want to share itright now, share it.
Yeah, it's uh just on Facebookand it's um purpose.
SPEAKER_02 (08:16):
Wait, no, I don't want to say it wrong.
Oh my god, I say it all thetime, and all of a sudden I like
question myself prosperous andprofitable conscious
entrepreneurs.
So proper prosperous andprofitable conscious
entrepreneurs.
SPEAKER_03 (08:28):
So check out her Facebook group that was like
really re-inspired, right, bythis book.
SPEAKER_02 (08:34):
Yeah, it's just kind of kicking back, kicking back
up, and um I'm excited to seewhere it goes.
And it's all about collaborationand connection and supporting
each other.
Um, not just about me givingmoney trainings.
I'm sure there'll be some ofthat in there, but it's really
more about the connection ofeverybody in the group and
getting just being with eachother and um yeah.
(08:58):
That's beautiful.
Supporting each other.
SPEAKER_03 (09:00):
I love that.
So awesome.
Okay, Bob.
How about you?
Like high-level what struck you?
SPEAKER_01 (09:06):
Yeah.
So for for for Kelly, for me, itwas alignment.
I mean, it just reaffirmed andconfirmed what I was doing and
why I'm doing it.
I left, I've been in corporate,um, uh, someone executive coach,
right?
And I've left corporate.
I made a big decision.
My head was a mess.
I mean, a total mess because mybiggest fear, whenever anyone
(09:30):
would ask me, was getting laidoff or not being able to provide
for my family.
And then here I was at the edgeof another opportunity, I'll
call it.
Uh, my wife had been telling mefor years go on your own.
Why are you not on your own?
My friends have been telling me.
And then I do remember now, itisn't exactly the same words,
(09:51):
but this was the essence of whatI heard from my coach Carla.
And she said something to theeffect of, okay, so you've been
laid off three times, you're onthe edge of it happening again.
Um, your biggest fear is losingyour work and you want to go
back into that life.
Exactly.
That's exactly.
(10:11):
I was laughing hysterically atmyself.
Because when you say somethingout loud that's in your head and
you realize how smart it is orhow stupid it is, and that was
pretty stupid.
And so now I was at the dilemmaof what am I gonna do?
Am I doing really gonna go on myown?
This is just crazy.
So again, plug, by the way,we're not getting paid for this.
(10:34):
No, we're not getting any, youknow, uh, what do you call
royalties off of recommendingthis book?
But Carla helped me kind ofdesign and I heard a podcast,
and by the way, I was lookingback at my journal.
By the way, um, Carla helped mereally slow down my mind and
take a breath.
I think Kelly, you would agreeon this one, and really think
(10:56):
through what I was thinking.
Think through what I wasthinking and verbalize it in a
way that, ooh, okay.
So that's what coaching is.
It helps you slow down yourthinking to a place where your
brain gets more oxygen and youcan make better decisions.
And so, okay, I know this isgoing somewhere with the book
here.
So I heard a podcast by John A.
(11:18):
John A.
Cuff was interviewing TimSchurer, who worked for Donald
Miller, uh, you know, the thedesigner chief, see whatever it
was, his CEO of Story Brands.
And some I was trying to workwith Carl, like, okay, what's
really, why am I doing this?
(11:39):
What's the purpose?
What's the value that's drivenhere?
And Tim said something on thatpodcast that just resonated with
me, and it was something I waslooking for, which was what if
success was helping the abouthelping the other person win?
And if you look at the goalgiver, that's the message here.
The message is giving extravalue, going above and beyond,
(12:05):
getting out of myself and notworrying about my next check and
the next gig and the oh my gosh,what's gonna happen?
Um, and so talking through andreading about every every time
I'd read a chapter, I'd go, ooh,that's yeah, that's it.
That's exactly it.
Oh my gosh, yes, that captureswhy I'm doing this.
It was such a huge affirmationof going from, okay, I think
(12:28):
this is the right, and I lookover my first three and a half
years, I don't even know howI've paid the bill.
All I know is that I've done,I've made more than just pay the
bills.
I'm doing really pretty good formy first three years on my own.
And I look at it as a these fivelaws of what he what
(12:49):
stratospheric success isencaptured in my mindset of
focusing on how can I help theother person win, serving.
You read this book and it talksabout serving others.
Um, so that's really been kindof the the launching pad for me,
the consistent theme for me.
(13:10):
It aligns with who I am.
I'm a man of faith, and at thecore of me is I just want to
help everybody be awesome.
SPEAKER_03 (13:19):
So cool.
You can just feel like theenergy both of you sharing, you
can just feel like it just likeso deeply resonates, right?
With like this is how it is,like this just feels good.
This is aligns, like you said,alignment.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (13:35):
I I just feel like you affirmed because that to me
to distill down what I want theFacebook group to be, like, how
do we just help each other win?
Like that's the that's the heartof it, but I've never said it
that way.
So I really appreciate that.
That's how you, you know, thatyou got it from that podcast,
but that you shared that here,and and that's that's really the
key.
SPEAKER_04 (13:54):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (13:55):
And then the rest comes from there, right?
That people feel your value,they they they want to get in
and and work with you and andsee what other gifts you have
and and benefit from you helpingthem win.
Um, but it comes from yourintention behind that.
Um, and the rest works out.
SPEAKER_01 (14:12):
Can I speak to the second one?
Carla, the law of compensation.
Sure.
I'll I'll just tell you that oneof my demons has always been
money.
And Carla knows this from mymarriage.
My wife said, whenever I say Ibuy something, what's your first
question?
How much did it cost?
Now I'm probably talking to 95%of the male population out
(14:33):
there, but because of how Imean, because of how I grew up
and and my focus on providing, Iwas it.
I was the only one.
I just had this over umdependence on my checkbook and
where the next money was.
That's why I was in a corporatejob.
So I need steady income, right?
(14:54):
And now I'm in not steady incomeuh phase of my life.
But I'm gonna tell you that thatthat really focusing on how can
I help the other person wintotally 100% turned me away from
thinking about when's my nextcheck coming in?
When's my next gig?
How am I gonna make it throughthe next three to six months?
My wife said this to me.
(15:15):
She said this, this was justlike literally three months ago.
She said, Hey, how are we doingfinancially?
And I said, Well, we're gonna begood for the next three months,
we're in good shape.
And she goes, she she was inshock.
She just kind of froze and shegoes, What did you say?
Well, we said we're good for thenext three months.
SPEAKER_03 (15:34):
She goes, Did you repeat that?
SPEAKER_01 (15:36):
I know I didn't.
And she said, My my old Bobwould have been freaking out
that we only had three monthsworth of income coming in, and
you're going, Oh yeah, we'll begood.
SPEAKER_00 (15:45):
We're gonna be good for the next three months.
And I got some otheropportunities.
SPEAKER_01 (15:50):
So good.
So being able to just this lawof compensation that your income
is determined by how many peopleyou serve.
I have just gone above andbeyond the duty, and I'm, you
know, I think Kelly and I willbe able to share and Carla the
instances and the situationswhere we have gone above and
beyond the call of duty with nointention of expectation of
(16:11):
something back.
SPEAKER_03 (16:13):
Yeah.
Yeah, I think for me, finishingthe book was like it was a
definitely a reminder because Ihad read it before.
But it was like I've been in aseason, I feel like, where God
has been like saying, like,you're here to serve, but it
(16:33):
it's not just in your business.
Like, I think I used to alwayslook to my business to like
serve and impact there.
And not that I wasn't doing itin other places, but like it
just he's just been showing melike you're here to serve in all
kinds of places.
And like I just need you to beavailable.
And reading this just remindedme again of that.
(16:55):
And also just like you weresaying, Bob, like just a
reminder to like get out of theway, shift the focus, right?
Like anytime I go to speak, ifI'm focused on me and worried
about me, then I feel allnervous and unsure and like I
feel like I got to get it allright.
And when I remember, this isn'tabout you, this is about them,
this is about the people in theroom, it completely shifts my
(17:18):
posture.
And I think that's what happenedwith me reading the book is like
it just reminded me of thisposture to approach business and
life with.
And it's just like like you bothhave said, it just feels
aligned, it feels right.
So good.
Um, so let's kind of dive intoeach one just a little bit and
(17:39):
share and share or evenbrainstorm.
Like if there's a place in yourbusiness that you're like, I
want to apply this, but likewhat does that look like?
We can help each other, likewhatever comes up for you.
Um, and let's start with the lawof value.
So the the law of value um isstated as your worth is
determined by how much more yougive in value than you take in
(18:02):
payment.
So what does this look like inyour business?
Or just just share what comes upfor you.
Like I you guys, you guys are sogood at this.
Like, it's better to just beinspired.
Like, what inspired you aroundthat?
Or what has it got you thinkingabout?
SPEAKER_02 (18:24):
There's a piece that I don't I was definitely
inspired by, and it's a littlebit of the law of value and a
little bit of the law ofauthenticity, probably a little
more of the law of authenticity.
So part of me wants to save it,but I'm just gonna share it
because it's coming to mindabout in my business.
I'm I've been trying to find away to be um to to still be able
(18:45):
to scale, but provide excellentvalue and serve the people that
are important to me.
And I I feel a little bit, and II should be careful with my
language around this, I feellike, but I just um that's where
I'm at in the moment with it,where I've kind of like fought
to to keep this space that I'vehad in my business with coaches
I've worked with in theaccounting space and other
(19:06):
places where I I've really umwanted to work with who I wanted
to work with and I wanted tofind a way to serve them well.
And I feel like it's a groupthat I was told many times I
couldn't be profitable with, andI just didn't believe in that.
And um and a big piece of thatis, you know, balancing that,
like really wanting to provide agood value, um, but make it
(19:27):
profitable for us and scalable.
And and um there, so I've beenworking with that, and there was
a piece where um people weregiven a choice to take out a
part if they wanted to pay alower price or they could pay a
higher price.
And and in in doing that, Ithink for in some ways I can see
the benefit of it, but I alsothink it lost a little of the
value and and it lost a littleof my voice in there.
(19:49):
So I'm I'm working on finding away to um to bring that value
back in and still make itequitable for us and valuable,
not equitable, but valuable,scalable for us, um, appropriate
for us, but also providing thevalue to the client.
So I don't know my answer tothat yet.
Um, but I know I have a desirefor that.
(20:11):
And it it may just be adifferent um frequency of how
often that's given.
So part of it's I do thesevideos for people's reports, and
you know, maybe it can be lessfrequent at that level, but
still be there, you know.
I think that could be importantor um, you know, I'm still
working on it, but that it'sreally important because I do
feel like we've always given areally good value, and but I
(20:32):
think that was more of a animportant part of it than I
realized at the time.
Um, and so we're justreevaluating that.
Yeah, that's so cool.
SPEAKER_01 (20:42):
How about you, Carl?
How about you?
Once you're the you're the hostof the podcast, the host of the
podcast usually goes last.
So I'm gonna see.
SPEAKER_03 (20:53):
All right.
Um, yeah, the law of value.
Um, I think that this issomething that I have operated
on for a long time.
But like when you focus on it,it just has me thinking about
like, how else could that look,you know, or or even just
(21:16):
highlighting those things orremembering kind of like you,
Kelly, like that video wasimportant.
Like even the last couple ofweeks, like I've done, like just
sent like a random, unexpectedtext to clients and realized
that like those little thingsare big things.
Um, and they're they're yeah,sometimes the I guess the little
(21:39):
things can be the big things andjust remembering those and not
letting the busyness or likejust too much on your plate kind
of like push those away withouteven realizing you let those
things go.
So I've been trying to bringthose things back.
But the other thing that thisone has also brought up for me
(22:00):
is I have been, um, I think youboth know, like involved with
another community and likegiving a lot of my time um
without compensation becausewe're kind of feeling this out
and we're not sure where it'sgonna go and like it feels very
aligned, but I want your guys'input is like, how do you know
(22:25):
when it's off balance or likeit's too much, right?
Because I think even likelisteners of this show, like how
often do we, and myself includedand maybe you two is like we get
off balance or we give, likewe're we're out of balance in
the giving, right?
Because sometimes we can we'reso good at the giving and we're
(22:45):
not good at the receiving, whichis the other law, the law of
receptivity, which oh my gosh,the line that struck me in the
book on the law of receptivitywas that when you stop receiving
or are closed to receiving, youstop the flow.
And like I can't wait to get tothat one.
(23:07):
But, anyways, I'd love what youguys think about that.
SPEAKER_02 (23:11):
That's this is so funny.
This is the I feel like this isthe only, I just looked to see
if I highlighted anything.
Literally, the only thing Ihighlighted in the book was all
the giving in the world won'tbring success, won't create the
results you want unless you alsomake yourself willing and able
to receive in like measure.
That's my only annotation.
Just that's the story.
(23:33):
I thought I was highlightingeverything.
Apparently not.
That's crazy.
SPEAKER_03 (23:37):
Well, that was kind of the only thing like I've
grappled with in the book,right?
But when you just said that,what I got is that sometimes we
can get tripped up, like we'regiving, we're putting so much
energy here, pouring so muchenergy here, and we're maybe
looking for something to comeback, like a flow here, instead
of realizing that the flow iscoming back over in this other
(23:57):
direction.
Yeah.
And like to maybe not worryabout that.
I'm not sure.
SPEAKER_01 (24:04):
I'll say law of receptivity, and maybe I was
thinking differently about itbecause I'm always looking for
feedback.
And how do you continue to growyourself?
How do you continue to developyour business?
How do you continue to beinnovative and creative?
Number one, you get your brainin a in a focused state, which
(24:25):
you talked about, Carl, which Icall that focused intention.
You know, I have so many leaderswho say to me, Well, Bob, I'm
trying.
No, there's no such thing astrying.
You are either doing or you'renot doing.
And then how do you know ifyou're doing?
Who's gonna tell you whether ornot you have a sense that you're
doing it?
But do the receivers of whatyou're doing, would they say,
(24:48):
Yeah, he's doing it or she'sdoing it, right?
So this receptivity thing, I'lljust give you a quick story.
This happened just recently.
Um, I've I've got five or sixreally cool business partners
who find me work, and I justlove the variety that I get to
do.
And I do some 360 debriefs, andI've been doing them now for
three and a half years, and I'venever had bad feedback until a
(25:13):
week ago.
And so I, you know, we have somechoices here that in terms of
receptivity, how receptive am Icommunicating to my business
partners and to my clients whatI'm preaching, which is you are
only as good as how often andhow consistent you go get
(25:33):
feedback on how you are doingconstantly, and then taking
action on it, evaluating it,taking action on it.
And so my first thought rightaway was I'm first of all, I'm
grateful.
So I typed an email very quicklyto the, you know, it was hard to
hear.
And I'm like going, what?
That's my first reaction iswhat?
I'm like, I haven't had a badreport in three and a half
(25:56):
years.
And the little voice inside ofme was saying, There's always a
first and this won't be thelast.
So I typed a note back and Isaid, Thank you so much for
sending this feedback.
Um, and I said, Hey, here's whathere's what I would like to do.
Here's what I'm thinking.
Um, even let's I'll even bewilling to offer a couple of
(26:17):
extra sessions to make sure weget the focus on what the client
wants out of the call right.
You know what she did?
Within five minutes, she sent mea note back.
And how many of you get an emailresponse five minutes from
anybody?
SPEAKER_04 (26:30):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (26:30):
She said, thank you for being open to the feedback.
And I love your idea, and let'ssee how your next call goes.
So I just really re-homed in.
I just re-homed in and said,okay, let me just make sure,
because I really wasn't superclear on what the client wanted
out of the next call.
So I did that.
(26:51):
And uh at the end of the call, Ialways asked for feedback.
Hey, give me two things thatwork really.
He goes, Bob, this was spot on.
This is exactly what I needed.
SPEAKER_03 (27:00):
Oh, wow.
SPEAKER_01 (27:01):
And uh I said, yeah, I said, do differently.
He said, well, maybe he gave mesome really good feedback.
Be a little bit more clearer onthe purpose of the first call
and the second call, so I knowexactly what to expect.
Because I didn't know what toexpect in the first call.
And he gave me some otherfeedback too about some other
details about the process.
And it's I said, thank you.
I just said thank you.
(27:22):
Thank you for the feedback.
I appreciate it.
And if you talk about that, it'sthe receptivity of being open to
knowing and figuring out andstaying writing close heard on,
we get into a rut of how good weare and we get into this flow of
oh, we're on a roll.
Yet I know sometimes when I gettoo much on a roll, I get too
(27:45):
much of me.
Focused on me.
So be able to step back andconstantly be open to maybe a
different viewpoint of how I'mcoming across to my some of my
clients.
I need to be doing that more ona regular basis.
SPEAKER_03 (27:59):
Wow.
I mean, I think that storytouched on almost all of these
values, like that you put intopractice.
That was such a great example.
Maybe we should state just allof them the law of value, the
law of compensation, the law ofinfluence, the law of
authenticity, and the law ofreceptivity.
(28:20):
So we're kind of bouncing aroundall of them.
But that was an example thatkind of touched on almost all of
them.
SPEAKER_01 (28:27):
I wonder, I wonder if there's a building here.
I I you guys tell me, but I'mthinking about okay, first I got
to get my mindset right.
Because I can do do do, but ifstill my mindset is, ooh, I know
this will help me get moremoney, that's not the right
mindset for me.
But once I start to see theimpact of me serving, once I
(28:49):
start to see how I'm overgivingand what the what's coming back,
that's surpris like you weresaying, surprising.
Like on it's like you said overhere, but it came from over
there.
Now you begin to influence andyou've unleashed your identity
and who you are.
And now you now that you'reauthentic and real person, you
(29:12):
can be totally open to receivinganything.
So I'm just I'm just kind ofcurious around maybe there is a
flow here to that deal.
SPEAKER_03 (29:22):
Yeah, I mean, in your example, you like, you
know, it was first like thatlittle sting or that little
ouch.
SPEAKER_04 (29:28):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_03 (29:29):
Um, but then it was like you just like put that over
here, like, okay, I know whatthis is, I'm gonna set this
aside.
And then you completely puttheir interests above yours, the
company and the client, right?
Yeah.
And that literally gave you allof your actions and like kind of
a relief to set yourself aside,right?
SPEAKER_01 (29:51):
Yeah, you guys, yeah.
I even said to myself, Bob, bob,bob, be who you've called to be.
Because I was all of a sudden alittle bit.
Fear, right?
A little bit of fear, a littlebit of anxiety.
And then I said, wait a minute,do what guys called you to do,
do what you do best, which is tolisten and pay attention and
nail the purpose and thendeliver.
SPEAKER_03 (30:13):
So you tied feedback to receptivity, which like I
hadn't thought about it in thatway, but I think that's such a
cool way.
And you are so good at feedback.
Like you did a call for us onyou know, asking for feedback.
Um what else?
How how else does the law ofreceptivity show up in your
business?
(30:33):
Like, what does that look like?
Because I for me, I think that'sthe hardest one to like it's
like slippery.
SPEAKER_01 (30:42):
I don't think yeah, Kelly, what do you think is
slippery?
SPEAKER_02 (30:44):
Well, I've just been thinking through as you've been
talking, and I I'm not directlygoing to answer your question,
Carla.
SPEAKER_03 (30:49):
So maybe we can get back to it, but go wherever
you're gonna be.
SPEAKER_02 (30:52):
I've been thinking a little bit like there are times
where things can get out ofbalance and that it's okay to
not continue to give in acertain place too, or to shift
that, or because we can we cantend to overgive.
Um, I think that happenssometimes when there's an
expectation of something inreturn, and we can kind of
create a negative feeling.
(31:12):
Um, but it is possible toovergive or not be invited to
give and kind of force that.
Like there's some places thatthat could get out of balance.
So I think it's it's okay toassess that and to kind of be
honest with yourself.
Um, you know, um, and to keepthat in balance.
I think of like really checkingin with ourselves and like
(31:34):
there's without naming names,there's a situation I've been
involved in doing some coachingfor years, and I have to
occasionally assess the thevalue of it.
And I have continued to comeback to like it's still um a
value that's in alignment, butI've questioned it so many
times.
But it's I have to give myselfthat reflection time to to make
(31:56):
sure things are balanced.
And there's been sometimes it'sgone out of balance and then
it's kind of come back aroundthe other way.
And and I just have to be honestwith myself.
And and that's where I do withpeople in their pricing too,
because I do coach people onthat.
It's like it's there is, youknow, there is some science to
it.
There's some things out there,there's some theories that we
can follow, but it matters howit feels in your body and how
(32:18):
you feel about it and how it'sreceived.
And I think if you kind ofalign, because we do, we we're
not doing everything we're doingfor free, right?
We have to for all of us, thisis an income that we've just
steward our time and our talent.
SPEAKER_03 (32:31):
And yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (32:32):
Yeah.
So there, you know, we have tobe open to receiving something
for that.
And so for me, um, of course,there's marketplace and there's
some things that we can base, orif you're selling a product, you
can look at your cost of thatand add something to it.
Um, so there's things that wecan use, but it really matters
how you're feeling about thatexchange and checking in on that
(32:52):
and um and just being honestwith yourself on a regular basis
to like check in and evaluatethat.
And sometimes what I loved aboutwhat you said, Carla, about the
flow, like sometimes the paymentcomes from over here.
So, like this organization, I'mthinking of I can isolate on one
piece of it, like what am Igetting paid to do what I'm
doing?
Like, and that doesn't alwaysfeel like if I just use that
(33:15):
part of the equation, it doesn'twork.
But then when I think about allthe other ways and the impact
that I'm making or the ways thatI receive some things back from
it, I I come to this placewhere, oh yeah, all those other
pieces are kind of part of thatflow.
And and that's where I find myum I find that we're we're in
value together.
Um, and I'm not overgiving andthey're not overgiving.
(33:36):
So it's kind of an interestingthought process.
It's not a it's not the mostsimplistic formula to look at.
You have to figure in a lot offactors.
But I think if we get if you getat the end of the day and you're
not feeling good about it, andyou really analyze that and be
honest with yourself, you know,if you if it's not the right
fit, you can change things.
Um but make sure you're lookingat all the all the elements of
(33:58):
the formula to add into it, allthe ways that you're giving and
receiving.
Um and really pay attention inyour body and in your heart.
I think that, you know, I thinkit comes down to that.
That's always where people inthe end, when they feel a kind
of way about their pricing,we'll talk about some of the
things happening.
But when they really get intotheir truth and think and work
(34:18):
through um into their body, wecan find the place that just
feels really good and it feelsgood for them and and for their
people that their clients.
And um, that's when salesdoesn't feel uh yucky.
That's when like you can havereally good conversations with
people and feel authentic andnot like a no offense to car
salesman, but you don't feellike a used car salesman or that
(34:39):
stereotype, you know, you canfeel really good about it.
And I think that's reallyimportant for people that you
know are looking to build abusiness.
You have to feel good about whatyou're giving and receiving.
And you can walk away and changeit if you don't.
SPEAKER_03 (34:53):
Yeah.
Well, thank you for rememberingthat I had asked that question
because I was getting off onsomething else.
And I, you just really helped mebe clear because last week I was
feeling like kind of out ofalignment and like questioning
everything.
But what I did come back to waslike, I'm such high
responsibility that I was likeway taking responsibility for
(35:17):
things that I don't need to takeresponsibility for, that
nobody's asked me to takeresponsibility for over in that
other area, right?
And once I did sort that out,and I just realized like, okay,
I just need to watch theboundaries and lines and like be
responsible for my own energy.
And and um I felt so muchbetter.
(35:39):
Yeah.
So thank you for that.
You helped me remember and getclear about that.
SPEAKER_02 (35:44):
I think Kelsey and I don't remember the other
question we were talking about.
SPEAKER_03 (35:47):
That's okay.
SPEAKER_01 (35:49):
Well, it'll come back.
But I want to what you saidreally is trust your gut.
Trust your gut.
SPEAKER_02 (35:55):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (35:55):
And is it in your lane?
Is it in your lane?
SPEAKER_02 (35:59):
Oh, that's a good one.
SPEAKER_01 (36:00):
Isn't that a good one?
I mean, think about it.
Why are we doing what we do?
We're in our we're in the lanesof where our gifted areas are,
of our niche, of what we've beencalled to do.
And what I yeah, I'll just giveyou a great example.
I like doing pro bono work,right?
I mean, look, and then I'malways evaluating is it in my
niche?
(36:21):
Is it something I'm excitedabout?
Is it in my lane?
And I took something that waskind of out of my lane, and I
spent because it was out of mylane, it was hard to do the
research, hard to gather thedata.
It took a lot of effort, itwasn't all that much fun.
But I I I'll bet you I put inthree times more hours into
(36:42):
designing that custom two-hourworkshop for a nine nonprofit
than I would have had it been inmy lane.
Now look, it went well, it wentokay, but man, I was exhausted
at the end.
And I checked myself and I said,Would I do that again?
I think I would refer somebodyelse to who loved that topic.
(37:02):
It wasn't in my lane.
So checking my gut, if I wouldhave said, what's the little
voice telling you, Bob, thatyou're ignoring right now?
I know you're a giver, I knowyou love to serve.
Is are you the perfect personfor this opportunity?
(37:22):
And I I I wish I would haveasked myself that question
because I probably would havesaid, probably not.
Powerful.
SPEAKER_03 (37:34):
Do you guys have a question you want to ask?
SPEAKER_01 (37:37):
Yeah.
I mean, what do you guys when ifyou could summarize the
receptivity piece, what do youthink the essence of the message
is?
About the law of receptivity.
The key is give uh the key togiving is being open to
receiving.
SPEAKER_02 (38:00):
They say it in the book, and there's a story, it
actually comes from a TonyRobbins thing, but um like don't
don't shut off other people'sgifts either.
Like, don't shut off, don't, youknow.
I think of this too, even withclients of you know, thinking
about working with people andlike um this I don't want to
make this all about money, but Iguess that's the filter through
(38:21):
which I do so much of my work, Ican't help it.
But like, you know, somebodywill automatically offer the pro
bono or automatically offer thesomething at a discount.
And it's it's because they'reassuming something about that
other person and they're maybenot holding them as powerful.
There could even be a gift inthat person showing up and
paying for that service so theytake it seriously and and really
(38:42):
um commit to it.
So we we don't want to close offthat gift.
We can certainly there's a placeto do those things.
There's certainly a place tooffer um, you know, all kinds of
different ways of serving peopleoutside of just exchanging
money, but there's um not toclose off the gift.
And so the Tony Robbins thing,and I'm sure I'm not gonna get
this right, but when he wasearly on in his business, um
(39:06):
somebody was meeting him forlunch and he was insisting on
paying because he felt like thatwas the right thing.
And and the person said to him,Don't take away the gift of me
buying this lunch, like thatkind of a thought.
And and I see that when youknow, my my husband loves to buy
the dinner for everybody.
And it's like, well, peopledon't want to always just
receive that.
Sometimes they want to pay itback too.
(39:27):
So you've got to give them thatopportunity.
And so I think of that a littlebit of like sometimes we think
we're doing it for the rightreason, but it might be that
you're shutting off anopportunity for somebody else to
give to you, and that that thatjust is the part that really
closes that flow.
And so whether it's in ourbusiness, our personal lives, in
our, you know, it doesn't alwayshave to be us giving.
(39:47):
We there's a give and take thatmakes it feel good to that other
person you're working with too.
And I think that's reallyimportant.
SPEAKER_03 (39:54):
I think that's so true.
And I think that like this hasbeen something that I think I've
been navigating for a lot ofyears of like, I think I was
always like lopsided in thegiving.
And um, like even just inpersonal relationships, like
(40:16):
think about when like somebodygives you a compliment and then
you like they or you givesomebody a compliment and they
automatically return with acompliment to you, and you're
kind of like, well, wait, like Ijust wanted to give you that
compliment, right?
Like it doesn't feel good eitherdirection.
Um and like for me, I think Ijust it was lopsided.
Like I and I remember when my Ilost both my parents like within
(40:41):
six months.
And I remember during that time,like that was one of the
loneliest times.
And I really had to reflect andgo, like, where are my people?
Um, during that time when Ineeded them.
And I really had to be honestand look, and I'm like, I've
really taught people that I'mokay, that I'm strong, that I
don't, I'm always the onelistening to them and not
(41:05):
allowing them in over here.
And that was like a hugeeye-opening thing.
Um, so that's definitely a workin progress for me.
But like the rewards of likelearning to surrender, learning
to receive, learning to let myfriends pour into me has been
like one of the greatest gifts.
SPEAKER_01 (41:28):
You know, it's interesting, you guys.
This is um my senses for thiswhole message here.
It again, trust your spiritabout where you're at.
Because it's not a soft, fluffything, somebody said to me, Bob.
It's based on your pastexperience.
Your gut is based on your pastexperience, and so there's this
little voice telling yousomething that I mean you're
(41:49):
ignoring.
So what are you ignoring?
Um, and the other cool thingabout this I just listened to a
podcast by Taylor Welch.
Taylor Welch, yeah.
It's called The Deep End.
And you want to go deep.
I mean, it's really good.
He says, You know that you are afraction of what you have been
called to be.
And most of this is fear-based.
(42:10):
If we're not providing value,we're afraid of, oh, how are
people gonna perceive me?
If I'm not taking all of the probono opportunities, what are
people gonna think of me?
And and I'm never gonna be ableto make it.
You know, what's the underlyingfear message under there?
If I'm not authentic.
Um somebody else said to me justrecently, when you're not being
(42:33):
your true self and who you'vebeen called to be, it it's a
very lonely life because youspend so much time trying to be
somebody else.
There's so much effort andenergy put into being somebody
else.
And then the law of influence islike the influence grows as you
place others' interest first.
So I I love that is likeunleash, give yourself the
(42:57):
permission to receive and to saythank you.
I love what you said.
I think you said it, Kelly orCarla, kind of together.
You said, Look, I want to give.
You know, there's some peoplesay, Well, Bob, you don't have
to pay.
I said, I want to give.
Let me give.
And they they kind of backed offa little bit.
(43:18):
And um, but I just had to bemore intentional about when I
want to give, I want to give.
Because you are you're cuttingsomeone else off from sharing
their old gifts.
I think that was really uh veryinsightful, Kelly.
Really cool.
SPEAKER_03 (43:29):
Yeah, so good.
SPEAKER_02 (43:32):
I'm also still thinking about the relationship
part though, Carla, where whatyou said about you had trained
people to to that you were justokay.
I think that's really huge.
And I think you could look intoevery dynamic of relationship
that we can have, and you know,marriage or partners, children,
(43:54):
teammates, coworkers, clients,and like look at um look at that
give and take and how um there'sa place in in every one of those
relationships to to probablyfind more ways to give or
receive, you know, look at thethat balance.
And that, you know, I can thinkof um times for sure I've done
(44:14):
that in in my marriagerelationship where I mean
there's lots of ways that wereally good at that, but there's
some places where you knowyou're you're not allowing that
flow back, you know.
I think that's a reallyimportant place to be honest um
with ourselves too.
SPEAKER_03 (44:29):
That's a place that I feel like we have been
navigating a lot.
Like my husband just keepstelling me, like, he received he
receives when I can receive hislove.
Like, you know, when I allow hislove, him to shower his love,
like is when he feels the mostloved.
(44:52):
And like it's kind of a trip,right?
Like it's it's like messes withyour mind.
Um but so beautiful.
SPEAKER_01 (45:01):
My wife is so smart, she's she's amazing.
She said, because she's the sameway, she's a giver, she is
generous to the max, and otherpeople want to give to her.
And she said, wait a minute, youknow what?
If I don't want to receive, isthat all about me?
Oh, I feel shame, or I feelembarrassed, or I feel yeah.
I think it is an ego thing.
It is an ego.
SPEAKER_02 (45:22):
Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (45:24):
Totally.
SPEAKER_02 (45:24):
And that'd be the last thing she'd want to be.
It's not coming from that in herheart, but it's it it is what it
is, you know.
It comes from ego.
Yeah, and that's I think thereal key to understanding that
is what it's like, whoa, that'sthat's not where I want to be at
all.
Like, I, you know, I want peopleto be able to shine their gifts
too, and um, that just shiftsthe whole thing, but it does
(45:46):
take an awakening to that, andprobably multiple times, you
know.
SPEAKER_03 (45:52):
Yeah, so true.
So maybe in closing, where doyou want to go?
How should we close?
Tell everybody read the book.
Yeah, read the book for sure.
Which one feels most like alive,edgy for you to like sort of
(46:13):
play with, go deeper with?
SPEAKER_01 (46:18):
I'll say the one.
I think the authenticity.
SPEAKER_03 (46:23):
Authenticity.
SPEAKER_01 (46:24):
Because how many of us are acting differently at
work than we are at home, orvice versa?
And we're flexing and spending alot of effort trying to be
someone that we think should weshould be, or that other people
have been telling us we need tobe, instead of being who you're
called to be.
Yeah, and when there is so muchfreedom in allowing your work to
(46:47):
come out of that authenticitypiece and finding your way
there.
And that when you feel a rub atwork, when you're feeling stress
and you can't sleep and you'reputting in too much effort, it
may be a values clash of what'simportant.
SPEAKER_03 (47:06):
Yeah, well, and in the book, the authenticity of
the story of Deborah Davenport,right?
Like she had kind of gonethrough hardship and then into
real estate and kind ofdiscovering that like the
greatest thing she had to offerwas herself, right?
And that story was so inspiring.
That that that's the edgiest onefor me too, Bob.
Even like even on this podcast,like I know that there's like
(47:30):
another level of authenticity ofthe podcast that I want to go
to.
Like I've been in a place ofsort of like teaching and
sharing lessons and things thatI've learned, but there's
another layer of just likesharing my life.
You know, I've had clients say,like, I just want to get in your
head and your heart and see howyou think.
(47:51):
And I haven't known how totranslate that in the podcast,
but I it is authenticity.
And like that's that's the one Iwant to play with the most, too.
SPEAKER_01 (48:03):
It's so much freedom.
SPEAKER_03 (48:05):
So much freedom.
So much freedom.
Can you handle it?
SPEAKER_01 (48:11):
Probably not, Kelly.
SPEAKER_02 (48:14):
Kelly, how about you?
I I'm feeling um well, first ofall, I'm reading the next book,
The Leader.
So I want to see how Go GiverLeader.
Yeah, the go-giver leader.
Um, because I I want to see, Ithink I'm blind to some of it in
with my team to some extent.
(48:34):
I think I think I have somepieces kind of in the business.
Um I'm gonna look at it withpersonal relationship and then
also as a leader, but in thisspecific group of five, um, I
think it's number two.
And I think it's, you know, I'mplaying with the Facebook group
and even playing with like waysthat I can help people in a
different way in the business.
(48:55):
And um so I feel like law ofcompensation and your income is
determined by how many peopleyou serve and how well you serve
them.
I think I'm playing in thatarea.
I feel like authenticity, likethat is probably my top value in
life.
So I feel like I've got a lot ofthat in my business already.
And um I feel it's say that Ireally align with that one.
(49:17):
Um, but the law of compensationis is the one I think I'm
playing with the most.
And I'm looking forward toseeing how it goes in the
Facebook group and just open toum where we go with that.
I think it's gonna be reallyfun.
That's beautiful.
SPEAKER_03 (49:32):
Okay, I think that concludes our conversation.
Um, I hope that it inspired yourthinking or stirred your
thinking or makes you want to goget the book.
Go get the book.
SPEAKER_01 (49:45):
And just for the listeners, this was not
scripted.
SPEAKER_03 (49:49):
No, at all.
They didn't even know we weregonna do this today.
Exactly.
SPEAKER_01 (49:54):
It was like you put the five laws up there as a
summary, and we're going, okay,here we go.
SPEAKER_02 (49:59):
I have an idea, guys.
That's how this whole thinggoes.
I have an idea, guys, fromCarla.
And they were like, let's go.
SPEAKER_03 (50:06):
So true.
Thanks for playing.
All right, thanks for tuninginto our mastermind.
It was fun to have you here.
And go get the book.
We'll put a link in the shownotes and to Kelly and um Bob's
work too.
So all right, guys, thanks forplaying.
SPEAKER_01 (50:24):
It was fun.
SPEAKER_03 (50:28):
Thank you for making it all the way to the end, and
thank you for listening todifferently.
If you enjoyed this episode,will you please still leave a
five-star review and share itwith someone you love?
Goodbye for now.
I'll see you next week.
A deep change in the way that we live requires a deep
change in the way that we think.
I'm Carla Reeves, and this isDifferently.
Today we're doing somethingdifferent.
I want to invite you into ourmastermind.
Um, gosh, we've been doing thismastermind.
(00:22):
I has it been a couple years,you guys, almost something
around there.
Let me see your yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (00:29):
20 looks like uh number one call was November 3rd
of 2023.
SPEAKER_03 (00:35):
It's been two years.
No, it's been two years.
Oh, this is perfect.
So we're celebrating ouranniversary.
Happy anniversary.
Happy anniversary.
So about two years ago, Iinvited my guests here today to
do a mastermind.
We didn't really know what wewere creating, but it's not an
(00:56):
ordinary mastermind.
And every time I feel like it'sa little bit different, but it's
always conversation that fuelsour um our lives, our business.
We talk all kinds of things.
We talk business, we talk life,we talk dreams and adventure,
um, and we read books together.
(01:17):
And today we thought it would bereally fun to bring you into the
conversation.
We just finished the book calledThe Go Giver.
And we just want to we just wantto share what we're getting from
this today.
And so we're just gonna bringyou into our last conversation
about the book um and the fivestratosphere stratospheric laws
of success.
So we read the Go Giver.
(01:38):
Um, gosh, I don't even have itin front of me to say the
authors.
Do one of you have the authors?
SPEAKER_01 (01:44):
Bob Berg and John David Mann.
SPEAKER_03 (01:47):
Yes.
So good.
So I have Kelly Marshall and BobParsons here, and they have both
been on the podcast at leastonce before.
Um, so Kelly, why don't youstart by just giving us a little
introduction about you and whatyou do and kind of maybe your
the season of your business?
(02:08):
Okay.
SPEAKER_02 (02:10):
Um, so uh yeah, I'm Kelly Marshall.
I'm in Buffalo, New York, andI'm really passionate about um
working with consciouscompanies, purpose-driven
people, and um working with themon money.
And I really want to help themmake more money and keep more of
their money and really feel goodabout kind of that flow of money
(02:30):
in their lives and theirbusiness.
Um and I now have a team of nineum that help me.
And we provide bookkeepingservices and financial coaching
um to conscious business owners,conscious entrepreneurs.
Sometimes they have a teamthemselves, sometimes it's just
um solopreneurs.
SPEAKER_03 (02:51):
Yay! And Kelly has been my bookkeeper for for
years.
I don't even know how manypeople.
And you were one of my first.
Yes.
So awesome.
So excited.
Um, okay, Bob, how about you?
SPEAKER_01 (03:04):
Okay, first I have to correct.
Um, I think our first mastermindwas like May, April or May of
2024.
Okay.
I was looking at our firstcoaching meeting with Carla, who
was my coach who helped me getstarted uh with my business.
So I'm an executive coach.
I work with mid-level leadersand above.
(03:24):
I do mainly one-on-one, and Ilove I help people move from
great to extraordinary throughcoaching and conversations.
And I do see keynotes, I do somepublic speaking, I do some work
custom workshops, but everythingI do is custom for leaders and
their teams.
And Carl, like I said, Carla wasum instrumental in getting my
(03:47):
mind sorted out.
I'll call a lot of mind trafficaround going on my own and
leaving corporate.
And then Kelly has just beenthis super transparent, amazing,
open person on our mastermind.
That every time I get on a callwith you all, I like, oh my
gosh, I tell my wife, you got tohear what we talked about today.
SPEAKER_02 (04:07):
Oh, it's so I always I credit you and Carla for
asking the best questions I'veever been asked.
So I think you guys have a wayof of supporting us to draw out
that conversation that's justreally powerful.
SPEAKER_03 (04:20):
Yeah, not everybody's here today, but like
it's just been so good.
We were talking this morningjust as we started.
Like, just we when we started,we all felt like a little bit
alone as entrepreneurs and on anisland kind of operating, and
these conversations have justbeen so life-giving.
Um okay, so the go-giver.
(04:41):
Um, we've all just been wowed bythis book.
I I had read it before and readit a second time and was equally
as wowed, if not more.
But let's just kind of startlike, so we finished it.
Like, what what was kind of whatwas striking you as you finished
it?
Like what was standing out toyou the most just as you read
(05:02):
this book, kind of from ahigh-level perspective.
And Kelly, I know you had likemind-blowing insights that first
call.
SPEAKER_02 (05:11):
I think we were supposed to read the first three
chapters.
So I just want to say too, I wastold to read this book when I
first started my business,probably in this version of the
business started in 2018.
Um, and I was told to read thebook then, and I remember being
like, oh yeah, and I probablyeven ordered it, couldn't find
that copy when it was our timeto read it.
But um I never did, and I justthink I wasn't ready yet at that
(05:34):
time, and that you know, I'vedone a lot of work and kind of
the energy of money and law ofattraction, and and so many
other books that I've read inthat world, but this was so
different and so practical, andI was just inspired by every
page.
And um, so we read the firstthree chapters, and I came back
and I'm like, guys, like my mindis blown right now.
(05:56):
And then we decided coming outof your skin.
Like, it was so cool.
Well, and and um, I don't knowif I should share that part now,
but I was inspired.
I literally with that morning,and you with the help of um Chat
GPT, reenvisioned um a big partof my business, but also of um
my Facebook group, which I hadbeen like trying to find an
(06:19):
answer to like how to serve inthere in a new way.
It had gone kind of dormant.
I had shifted some things.
It it started out of is actuallya book club and a really
supportive, lovely space, andand it grew with some incredible
people.
And I always loved everybody inthere, and I used to show up
once a week for training andlike to provide a training
(06:40):
video.
And at some point it just umfizzled out a little bit for me.
And I but I I still wanted to bein there and providing value and
loving on the group, but Icouldn't find a way.
I mean, literally, probably fortwo years I've been searching
for this and it and afterreading, I don't did I finish
the book by the time I did that.
I don't think I finished maybe Ihave I don't think you had.
(07:01):
I don't think I'd finished it.
And I started this umbrainstorming with ChatGPT about
how to create a group usingthose principles, and it blew me
away and it was everything Iwanted.
And we've implemented that sincethen.
So our last call was probablythree weeks ago, and we already
have it in place in the group,and it's the changes are
happening, and it's um it justwas so aligned and so authentic
(07:22):
and just felt so good.
So that was what inspired me todo, and then I devoured the rest
of the book in between like whenwe decided we were gonna finish
it for our next meeting.
I read it that day.
Um it's it's just so good andit's so aligned for people that
like everybody in our littlemastermind is purpose-driven.
We care about the value we'redelivering, we care about the
(07:44):
people we're working with, wecare about the world.
Um, and this just gave me aformula to be able to be me and
and do work the purpose of myheart, but do it in a way that
also was really good for my teamand my business and my clients.
And yeah, it just felt good.
That's so beautiful, Kelly.
SPEAKER_03 (08:04):
So I want to make sure, is that a it can any is
that an open community?
Like we can put the link in theshow notes.
Okay, so make sure you sendthat.
And if you want to share itright now, share it.
Yeah, it's uh just on Facebookand it's um purpose.
SPEAKER_02 (08:16):
Wait, no, I don't want to say it wrong.
Oh my god, I say it all thetime, and all of a sudden I like
question myself prosperous andprofitable conscious
entrepreneurs.
So proper prosperous andprofitable conscious
entrepreneurs.
SPEAKER_03 (08:28):
So check out her Facebook group that was like
really re-inspired, right, bythis book.
SPEAKER_02 (08:34):
Yeah, it's just kind of kicking back, kicking back
up, and um I'm excited to seewhere it goes.
And it's all about collaborationand connection and supporting
each other.
Um, not just about me givingmoney trainings.
I'm sure there'll be some ofthat in there, but it's really
more about the connection ofeverybody in the group and
getting just being with eachother and um yeah.
(08:58):
That's beautiful.
Supporting each other.
SPEAKER_03 (09:00):
I love that.
So awesome.
Okay, Bob.
How about you?
Like high-level what struck you?
SPEAKER_01 (09:06):
Yeah.
So for for for Kelly, for me, itwas alignment.
I mean, it just reaffirmed andconfirmed what I was doing and
why I'm doing it.
I left, I've been in corporate,um, uh, someone executive coach,
right?
And I've left corporate.
I made a big decision.
My head was a mess.
I mean, a total mess because mybiggest fear, whenever anyone
(09:30):
would ask me, was getting laidoff or not being able to provide
for my family.
And then here I was at the edgeof another opportunity, I'll
call it.
Uh, my wife had been telling mefor years go on your own.
Why are you not on your own?
My friends have been telling me.
And then I do remember now, itisn't exactly the same words,
(09:51):
but this was the essence of whatI heard from my coach Carla.
And she said something to theeffect of, okay, so you've been
laid off three times, you're onthe edge of it happening again.
Um, your biggest fear is losingyour work and you want to go
back into that life.
Exactly.
That's exactly.
(10:11):
I was laughing hysterically atmyself.
Because when you say somethingout loud that's in your head and
you realize how smart it is orhow stupid it is, and that was
pretty stupid.
And so now I was at the dilemmaof what am I gonna do?
Am I doing really gonna go on myown?
This is just crazy.
So again, plug, by the way,we're not getting paid for this.
(10:34):
No, we're not getting any, youknow, uh, what do you call
royalties off of recommendingthis book?
But Carla helped me kind ofdesign and I heard a podcast,
and by the way, I was lookingback at my journal.
By the way, um, Carla helped mereally slow down my mind and
take a breath.
I think Kelly, you would agreeon this one, and really think
(10:56):
through what I was thinking.
Think through what I wasthinking and verbalize it in a
way that, ooh, okay.
So that's what coaching is.
It helps you slow down yourthinking to a place where your
brain gets more oxygen and youcan make better decisions.
And so, okay, I know this isgoing somewhere with the book
here.
So I heard a podcast by John A.
(11:18):
John A.
Cuff was interviewing TimSchurer, who worked for Donald
Miller, uh, you know, the thedesigner chief, see whatever it
was, his CEO of Story Brands.
And some I was trying to workwith Carl, like, okay, what's
really, why am I doing this?
(11:39):
What's the purpose?
What's the value that's drivenhere?
And Tim said something on thatpodcast that just resonated with
me, and it was something I waslooking for, which was what if
success was helping the abouthelping the other person win?
And if you look at the goalgiver, that's the message here.
The message is giving extravalue, going above and beyond,
(12:05):
getting out of myself and notworrying about my next check and
the next gig and the oh my gosh,what's gonna happen?
Um, and so talking through andreading about every every time
I'd read a chapter, I'd go, ooh,that's yeah, that's it.
That's exactly it.
Oh my gosh, yes, that captureswhy I'm doing this.
It was such a huge affirmationof going from, okay, I think
(12:28):
this is the right, and I lookover my first three and a half
years, I don't even know howI've paid the bill.
All I know is that I've done,I've made more than just pay the
bills.
I'm doing really pretty good formy first three years on my own.
And I look at it as a these fivelaws of what he what
(12:49):
stratospheric success isencaptured in my mindset of
focusing on how can I help theother person win, serving.
You read this book and it talksabout serving others.
Um, so that's really been kindof the the launching pad for me,
the consistent theme for me.
(13:10):
It aligns with who I am.
I'm a man of faith, and at thecore of me is I just want to
help everybody be awesome.
SPEAKER_03 (13:19):
So cool.
You can just feel like theenergy both of you sharing, you
can just feel like it just likeso deeply resonates, right?
With like this is how it is,like this just feels good.
This is aligns, like you said,alignment.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (13:35):
I I just feel like you affirmed because that to me
to distill down what I want theFacebook group to be, like, how
do we just help each other win?
Like that's the that's the heartof it, but I've never said it
that way.
So I really appreciate that.
That's how you, you know, thatyou got it from that podcast,
but that you shared that here,and and that's that's really the
key.
SPEAKER_04 (13:54):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (13:55):
And then the rest comes from there, right?
That people feel your value,they they they want to get in
and and work with you and andsee what other gifts you have
and and benefit from you helpingthem win.
Um, but it comes from yourintention behind that.
Um, and the rest works out.
SPEAKER_01 (14:12):
Can I speak to the second one?
Carla, the law of compensation.
Sure.
I'll I'll just tell you that oneof my demons has always been
money.
And Carla knows this from mymarriage.
My wife said, whenever I say Ibuy something, what's your first
question?
How much did it cost?
Now I'm probably talking to 95%of the male population out
(14:33):
there, but because of how Imean, because of how I grew up
and and my focus on providing, Iwas it.
I was the only one.
I just had this over umdependence on my checkbook and
where the next money was.
That's why I was in a corporatejob.
So I need steady income, right?
(14:54):
And now I'm in not steady incomeuh phase of my life.
But I'm gonna tell you that thatthat really focusing on how can
I help the other person wintotally 100% turned me away from
thinking about when's my nextcheck coming in?
When's my next gig?
How am I gonna make it throughthe next three to six months?
My wife said this to me.
(15:15):
She said this, this was justlike literally three months ago.
She said, Hey, how are we doingfinancially?
And I said, Well, we're gonna begood for the next three months,
we're in good shape.
And she goes, she she was inshock.
She just kind of froze and shegoes, What did you say?
Well, we said we're good for thenext three months.
SPEAKER_03 (15:34):
She goes, Did you repeat that?
SPEAKER_01 (15:36):
I know I didn't.
And she said, My my old Bobwould have been freaking out
that we only had three monthsworth of income coming in, and
you're going, Oh yeah, we'll begood.
SPEAKER_00 (15:45):
We're gonna be good for the next three months.
And I got some otheropportunities.
SPEAKER_01 (15:50):
So good.
So being able to just this lawof compensation that your income
is determined by how many peopleyou serve.
I have just gone above andbeyond the duty, and I'm, you
know, I think Kelly and I willbe able to share and Carla the
instances and the situationswhere we have gone above and
beyond the call of duty with nointention of expectation of
(16:11):
something back.
SPEAKER_03 (16:13):
Yeah.
Yeah, I think for me, finishingthe book was like it was a
definitely a reminder because Ihad read it before.
But it was like I've been in aseason, I feel like, where God
has been like saying, like,you're here to serve, but it
(16:33):
it's not just in your business.
Like, I think I used to alwayslook to my business to like
serve and impact there.
And not that I wasn't doing itin other places, but like it
just he's just been showing melike you're here to serve in all
kinds of places.
And like I just need you to beavailable.
And reading this just remindedme again of that.
(16:55):
And also just like you weresaying, Bob, like just a
reminder to like get out of theway, shift the focus, right?
Like anytime I go to speak, ifI'm focused on me and worried
about me, then I feel allnervous and unsure and like I
feel like I got to get it allright.
And when I remember, this isn'tabout you, this is about them,
this is about the people in theroom, it completely shifts my
(17:18):
posture.
And I think that's what happenedwith me reading the book is like
it just reminded me of thisposture to approach business and
life with.
And it's just like like you bothhave said, it just feels
aligned, it feels right.
So good.
Um, so let's kind of dive intoeach one just a little bit and
(17:39):
share and share or evenbrainstorm.
Like if there's a place in yourbusiness that you're like, I
want to apply this, but likewhat does that look like?
We can help each other, likewhatever comes up for you.
Um, and let's start with the lawof value.
So the the law of value um isstated as your worth is
determined by how much more yougive in value than you take in
(18:02):
payment.
So what does this look like inyour business?
Or just just share what comes upfor you.
Like I you guys, you guys are sogood at this.
Like, it's better to just beinspired.
Like, what inspired you aroundthat?
Or what has it got you thinkingabout?
SPEAKER_02 (18:24):
There's a piece that I don't I was definitely
inspired by, and it's a littlebit of the law of value and a
little bit of the law ofauthenticity, probably a little
more of the law of authenticity.
So part of me wants to save it,but I'm just gonna share it
because it's coming to mindabout in my business.
I'm I've been trying to find away to be um to to still be able
(18:45):
to scale, but provide excellentvalue and serve the people that
are important to me.
And I I feel a little bit, and II should be careful with my
language around this, I feellike, but I just um that's where
I'm at in the moment with it,where I've kind of like fought
to to keep this space that I'vehad in my business with coaches
I've worked with in theaccounting space and other
(19:06):
places where I I've really umwanted to work with who I wanted
to work with and I wanted tofind a way to serve them well.
And I feel like it's a groupthat I was told many times I
couldn't be profitable with, andI just didn't believe in that.
And um and a big piece of thatis, you know, balancing that,
like really wanting to provide agood value, um, but make it
(19:27):
profitable for us and scalable.
And and um there, so I've beenworking with that, and there was
a piece where um people weregiven a choice to take out a
part if they wanted to pay alower price or they could pay a
higher price.
And and in in doing that, Ithink for in some ways I can see
the benefit of it, but I alsothink it lost a little of the
value and and it lost a littleof my voice in there.
(19:49):
So I'm I'm working on finding away to um to bring that value
back in and still make itequitable for us and valuable,
not equitable, but valuable,scalable for us, um, appropriate
for us, but also providing thevalue to the client.
So I don't know my answer tothat yet.
Um, but I know I have a desirefor that.
(20:11):
And it it may just be adifferent um frequency of how
often that's given.
So part of it's I do thesevideos for people's reports, and
you know, maybe it can be lessfrequent at that level, but
still be there, you know.
I think that could be importantor um, you know, I'm still
working on it, but that it'sreally important because I do
feel like we've always given areally good value, and but I
(20:32):
think that was more of a animportant part of it than I
realized at the time.
Um, and so we're justreevaluating that.
Yeah, that's so cool.
SPEAKER_01 (20:42):
How about you, Carl?
How about you?
Once you're the you're the hostof the podcast, the host of the
podcast usually goes last.
So I'm gonna see.
SPEAKER_03 (20:53):
All right.
Um, yeah, the law of value.
Um, I think that this issomething that I have operated
on for a long time.
But like when you focus on it,it just has me thinking about
like, how else could that look,you know, or or even just
(21:16):
highlighting those things orremembering kind of like you,
Kelly, like that video wasimportant.
Like even the last couple ofweeks, like I've done, like just
sent like a random, unexpectedtext to clients and realized
that like those little thingsare big things.
Um, and they're they're yeah,sometimes the I guess the little
(21:39):
things can be the big things andjust remembering those and not
letting the busyness or likejust too much on your plate kind
of like push those away withouteven realizing you let those
things go.
So I've been trying to bringthose things back.
But the other thing that thisone has also brought up for me
(22:00):
is I have been, um, I think youboth know, like involved with
another community and likegiving a lot of my time um
without compensation becausewe're kind of feeling this out
and we're not sure where it'sgonna go and like it feels very
aligned, but I want your guys'input is like, how do you know
(22:25):
when it's off balance or likeit's too much, right?
Because I think even likelisteners of this show, like how
often do we, and myself includedand maybe you two is like we get
off balance or we give, likewe're we're out of balance in
the giving, right?
Because sometimes we can we'reso good at the giving and we're
(22:45):
not good at the receiving, whichis the other law, the law of
receptivity, which oh my gosh,the line that struck me in the
book on the law of receptivitywas that when you stop receiving
or are closed to receiving, youstop the flow.
And like I can't wait to get tothat one.
(23:07):
But, anyways, I'd love what youguys think about that.
SPEAKER_02 (23:11):
That's this is so funny.
This is the I feel like this isthe only, I just looked to see
if I highlighted anything.
Literally, the only thing Ihighlighted in the book was all
the giving in the world won'tbring success, won't create the
results you want unless you alsomake yourself willing and able
to receive in like measure.
That's my only annotation.
Just that's the story.
(23:33):
I thought I was highlightingeverything.
Apparently not.
That's crazy.
SPEAKER_03 (23:37):
Well, that was kind of the only thing like I've
grappled with in the book,right?
But when you just said that,what I got is that sometimes we
can get tripped up, like we'regiving, we're putting so much
energy here, pouring so muchenergy here, and we're maybe
looking for something to comeback, like a flow here, instead
of realizing that the flow iscoming back over in this other
(23:57):
direction.
Yeah.
And like to maybe not worryabout that.
I'm not sure.
SPEAKER_01 (24:04):
I'll say law of receptivity, and maybe I was
thinking differently about itbecause I'm always looking for
feedback.
And how do you continue to growyourself?
How do you continue to developyour business?
How do you continue to beinnovative and creative?
Number one, you get your brainin a in a focused state, which
(24:25):
you talked about, Carl, which Icall that focused intention.
You know, I have so many leaderswho say to me, Well, Bob, I'm
trying.
No, there's no such thing astrying.
You are either doing or you'renot doing.
And then how do you know ifyou're doing?
Who's gonna tell you whether ornot you have a sense that you're
doing it?
But do the receivers of whatyou're doing, would they say,
(24:48):
Yeah, he's doing it or she'sdoing it, right?
So this receptivity thing, I'lljust give you a quick story.
This happened just recently.
Um, I've I've got five or sixreally cool business partners
who find me work, and I justlove the variety that I get to
do.
And I do some 360 debriefs, andI've been doing them now for
three and a half years, and I'venever had bad feedback until a
(25:13):
week ago.
And so I, you know, we have somechoices here that in terms of
receptivity, how receptive am Icommunicating to my business
partners and to my clients whatI'm preaching, which is you are
only as good as how often andhow consistent you go get
(25:33):
feedback on how you are doingconstantly, and then taking
action on it, evaluating it,taking action on it.
And so my first thought rightaway was I'm first of all, I'm
grateful.
So I typed an email very quicklyto the, you know, it was hard to
hear.
And I'm like going, what?
That's my first reaction iswhat?
I'm like, I haven't had a badreport in three and a half
(25:56):
years.
And the little voice inside ofme was saying, There's always a
first and this won't be thelast.
So I typed a note back and Isaid, Thank you so much for
sending this feedback.
Um, and I said, Hey, here's whathere's what I would like to do.
Here's what I'm thinking.
Um, even let's I'll even bewilling to offer a couple of
(26:17):
extra sessions to make sure weget the focus on what the client
wants out of the call right.
You know what she did?
Within five minutes, she sent mea note back.
And how many of you get an emailresponse five minutes from
anybody?
SPEAKER_04 (26:30):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (26:30):
She said, thank you for being open to the feedback.
And I love your idea, and let'ssee how your next call goes.
So I just really re-homed in.
I just re-homed in and said,okay, let me just make sure,
because I really wasn't superclear on what the client wanted
out of the next call.
So I did that.
(26:51):
And uh at the end of the call, Ialways asked for feedback.
Hey, give me two things thatwork really.
He goes, Bob, this was spot on.
This is exactly what I needed.
SPEAKER_03 (27:00):
Oh, wow.
SPEAKER_01 (27:01):
And uh I said, yeah, I said, do differently.
He said, well, maybe he gave mesome really good feedback.
Be a little bit more clearer onthe purpose of the first call
and the second call, so I knowexactly what to expect.
Because I didn't know what toexpect in the first call.
And he gave me some otherfeedback too about some other
details about the process.
And it's I said, thank you.
I just said thank you.
(27:22):
Thank you for the feedback.
I appreciate it.
And if you talk about that, it'sthe receptivity of being open to
knowing and figuring out andstaying writing close heard on,
we get into a rut of how good weare and we get into this flow of
oh, we're on a roll.
Yet I know sometimes when I gettoo much on a roll, I get too
(27:45):
much of me.
Focused on me.
So be able to step back andconstantly be open to maybe a
different viewpoint of how I'mcoming across to my some of my
clients.
I need to be doing that more ona regular basis.
SPEAKER_03 (27:59):
Wow.
I mean, I think that storytouched on almost all of these
values, like that you put intopractice.
That was such a great example.
Maybe we should state just allof them the law of value, the
law of compensation, the law ofinfluence, the law of
authenticity, and the law ofreceptivity.
(28:20):
So we're kind of bouncing aroundall of them.
But that was an example thatkind of touched on almost all of
them.
SPEAKER_01 (28:27):
I wonder, I wonder if there's a building here.
I I you guys tell me, but I'mthinking about okay, first I got
to get my mindset right.
Because I can do do do, but ifstill my mindset is, ooh, I know
this will help me get moremoney, that's not the right
mindset for me.
But once I start to see theimpact of me serving, once I
(28:49):
start to see how I'm overgivingand what the what's coming back,
that's surpris like you weresaying, surprising.
Like on it's like you said overhere, but it came from over
there.
Now you begin to influence andyou've unleashed your identity
and who you are.
And now you now that you'reauthentic and real person, you
(29:12):
can be totally open to receivinganything.
So I'm just I'm just kind ofcurious around maybe there is a
flow here to that deal.
SPEAKER_03 (29:22):
Yeah, I mean, in your example, you like, you
know, it was first like thatlittle sting or that little
ouch.
SPEAKER_04 (29:28):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_03 (29:29):
Um, but then it was like you just like put that over
here, like, okay, I know whatthis is, I'm gonna set this
aside.
And then you completely puttheir interests above yours, the
company and the client, right?
Yeah.
And that literally gave you allof your actions and like kind of
a relief to set yourself aside,right?
SPEAKER_01 (29:51):
Yeah, you guys, yeah.
I even said to myself, Bob, bob,bob, be who you've called to be.
Because I was all of a sudden alittle bit.
Fear, right?
A little bit of fear, a littlebit of anxiety.
And then I said, wait a minute,do what guys called you to do,
do what you do best, which is tolisten and pay attention and
nail the purpose and thendeliver.
SPEAKER_03 (30:13):
So you tied feedback to receptivity, which like I
hadn't thought about it in thatway, but I think that's such a
cool way.
And you are so good at feedback.
Like you did a call for us onyou know, asking for feedback.
Um what else?
How how else does the law ofreceptivity show up in your
business?
(30:33):
Like, what does that look like?
Because I for me, I think that'sthe hardest one to like it's
like slippery.
SPEAKER_01 (30:42):
I don't think yeah, Kelly, what do you think is
slippery?
SPEAKER_02 (30:44):
Well, I've just been thinking through as you've been
talking, and I I'm not directlygoing to answer your question,
Carla.
SPEAKER_03 (30:49):
So maybe we can get back to it, but go wherever
you're gonna be.
SPEAKER_02 (30:52):
I've been thinking a little bit like there are times
where things can get out ofbalance and that it's okay to
not continue to give in acertain place too, or to shift
that, or because we can we cantend to overgive.
Um, I think that happenssometimes when there's an
expectation of something inreturn, and we can kind of
create a negative feeling.
(31:12):
Um, but it is possible toovergive or not be invited to
give and kind of force that.
Like there's some places thatthat could get out of balance.
So I think it's it's okay toassess that and to kind of be
honest with yourself.
Um, you know, um, and to keepthat in balance.
I think of like really checkingin with ourselves and like
(31:34):
there's without naming names,there's a situation I've been
involved in doing some coachingfor years, and I have to
occasionally assess the thevalue of it.
And I have continued to comeback to like it's still um a
value that's in alignment, butI've questioned it so many
times.
But it's I have to give myselfthat reflection time to to make
(31:56):
sure things are balanced.
And there's been sometimes it'sgone out of balance and then
it's kind of come back aroundthe other way.
And and I just have to be honestwith myself.
And and that's where I do withpeople in their pricing too,
because I do coach people onthat.
It's like it's there is, youknow, there is some science to
it.
There's some things out there,there's some theories that we
can follow, but it matters howit feels in your body and how
(32:18):
you feel about it and how it'sreceived.
And I think if you kind ofalign, because we do, we we're
not doing everything we're doingfor free, right?
We have to for all of us, thisis an income that we've just
steward our time and our talent.
SPEAKER_03 (32:31):
And yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (32:32):
Yeah.
So there, you know, we have tobe open to receiving something
for that.
And so for me, um, of course,there's marketplace and there's
some things that we can base, orif you're selling a product, you
can look at your cost of thatand add something to it.
Um, so there's things that wecan use, but it really matters
how you're feeling about thatexchange and checking in on that
(32:52):
and um and just being honestwith yourself on a regular basis
to like check in and evaluatethat.
And sometimes what I loved aboutwhat you said, Carla, about the
flow, like sometimes the paymentcomes from over here.
So, like this organization, I'mthinking of I can isolate on one
piece of it, like what am Igetting paid to do what I'm
doing?
Like, and that doesn't alwaysfeel like if I just use that
(33:15):
part of the equation, it doesn'twork.
But then when I think about allthe other ways and the impact
that I'm making or the ways thatI receive some things back from
it, I I come to this placewhere, oh yeah, all those other
pieces are kind of part of thatflow.
And and that's where I find myum I find that we're we're in
value together.
Um, and I'm not overgiving andthey're not overgiving.
(33:36):
So it's kind of an interestingthought process.
It's not a it's not the mostsimplistic formula to look at.
You have to figure in a lot offactors.
But I think if we get if you getat the end of the day and you're
not feeling good about it, andyou really analyze that and be
honest with yourself, you know,if you if it's not the right
fit, you can change things.
Um but make sure you're lookingat all the all the elements of
(33:58):
the formula to add into it, allthe ways that you're giving and
receiving.
Um and really pay attention inyour body and in your heart.
I think that, you know, I thinkit comes down to that.
That's always where people inthe end, when they feel a kind
of way about their pricing,we'll talk about some of the
things happening.
But when they really get intotheir truth and think and work
(34:18):
through um into their body, wecan find the place that just
feels really good and it feelsgood for them and and for their
people that their clients.
And um, that's when salesdoesn't feel uh yucky.
That's when like you can havereally good conversations with
people and feel authentic andnot like a no offense to car
salesman, but you don't feellike a used car salesman or that
(34:39):
stereotype, you know, you canfeel really good about it.
And I think that's reallyimportant for people that you
know are looking to build abusiness.
You have to feel good about whatyou're giving and receiving.
And you can walk away and changeit if you don't.
SPEAKER_03 (34:53):
Yeah.
Well, thank you for rememberingthat I had asked that question
because I was getting off onsomething else.
And I, you just really helped mebe clear because last week I was
feeling like kind of out ofalignment and like questioning
everything.
But what I did come back to waslike, I'm such high
responsibility that I was likeway taking responsibility for
(35:17):
things that I don't need to takeresponsibility for, that
nobody's asked me to takeresponsibility for over in that
other area, right?
And once I did sort that out,and I just realized like, okay,
I just need to watch theboundaries and lines and like be
responsible for my own energy.
And and um I felt so muchbetter.
(35:39):
Yeah.
So thank you for that.
You helped me remember and getclear about that.
SPEAKER_02 (35:44):
I think Kelsey and I don't remember the other
question we were talking about.
SPEAKER_03 (35:47):
That's okay.
SPEAKER_01 (35:49):
Well, it'll come back.
But I want to what you saidreally is trust your gut.
Trust your gut.
SPEAKER_02 (35:55):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (35:55):
And is it in your lane?
Is it in your lane?
SPEAKER_02 (35:59):
Oh, that's a good one.
SPEAKER_01 (36:00):
Isn't that a good one?
I mean, think about it.
Why are we doing what we do?
We're in our we're in the lanesof where our gifted areas are,
of our niche, of what we've beencalled to do.
And what I yeah, I'll just giveyou a great example.
I like doing pro bono work,right?
I mean, look, and then I'malways evaluating is it in my
niche?
(36:21):
Is it something I'm excitedabout?
Is it in my lane?
And I took something that waskind of out of my lane, and I
spent because it was out of mylane, it was hard to do the
research, hard to gather thedata.
It took a lot of effort, itwasn't all that much fun.
But I I I'll bet you I put inthree times more hours into
(36:42):
designing that custom two-hourworkshop for a nine nonprofit
than I would have had it been inmy lane.
Now look, it went well, it wentokay, but man, I was exhausted
at the end.
And I checked myself and I said,Would I do that again?
I think I would refer somebodyelse to who loved that topic.
(37:02):
It wasn't in my lane.
So checking my gut, if I wouldhave said, what's the little
voice telling you, Bob, thatyou're ignoring right now?
I know you're a giver, I knowyou love to serve.
Is are you the perfect personfor this opportunity?
(37:22):
And I I I wish I would haveasked myself that question
because I probably would havesaid, probably not.
Powerful.
SPEAKER_03 (37:34):
Do you guys have a question you want to ask?
SPEAKER_01 (37:37):
Yeah.
I mean, what do you guys when ifyou could summarize the
receptivity piece, what do youthink the essence of the message
is?
About the law of receptivity.
The key is give uh the key togiving is being open to
receiving.
SPEAKER_02 (38:00):
They say it in the book, and there's a story, it
actually comes from a TonyRobbins thing, but um like don't
don't shut off other people'sgifts either.
Like, don't shut off, don't, youknow.
I think of this too, even withclients of you know, thinking
about working with people andlike um this I don't want to
make this all about money, but Iguess that's the filter through
(38:21):
which I do so much of my work, Ican't help it.
But like, you know, somebodywill automatically offer the pro
bono or automatically offer thesomething at a discount.
And it's it's because they'reassuming something about that
other person and they're maybenot holding them as powerful.
There could even be a gift inthat person showing up and
paying for that service so theytake it seriously and and really
(38:42):
um commit to it.
So we we don't want to close offthat gift.
We can certainly there's a placeto do those things.
There's certainly a place tooffer um, you know, all kinds of
different ways of serving peopleoutside of just exchanging
money, but there's um not toclose off the gift.
And so the Tony Robbins thing,and I'm sure I'm not gonna get
this right, but when he wasearly on in his business, um
(39:06):
somebody was meeting him forlunch and he was insisting on
paying because he felt like thatwas the right thing.
And and the person said to him,Don't take away the gift of me
buying this lunch, like thatkind of a thought.
And and I see that when youknow, my my husband loves to buy
the dinner for everybody.
And it's like, well, peopledon't want to always just
receive that.
Sometimes they want to pay itback too.
(39:27):
So you've got to give them thatopportunity.
And so I think of that a littlebit of like sometimes we think
we're doing it for the rightreason, but it might be that
you're shutting off anopportunity for somebody else to
give to you, and that that thatjust is the part that really
closes that flow.
And so whether it's in ourbusiness, our personal lives, in
our, you know, it doesn't alwayshave to be us giving.
(39:47):
We there's a give and take thatmakes it feel good to that other
person you're working with too.
And I think that's reallyimportant.
SPEAKER_03 (39:54):
I think that's so true.
And I think that like this hasbeen something that I think I've
been navigating for a lot ofyears of like, I think I was
always like lopsided in thegiving.
And um, like even just inpersonal relationships, like
(40:16):
think about when like somebodygives you a compliment and then
you like they or you givesomebody a compliment and they
automatically return with acompliment to you, and you're
kind of like, well, wait, like Ijust wanted to give you that
compliment, right?
Like it doesn't feel good eitherdirection.
Um and like for me, I think Ijust it was lopsided.
Like I and I remember when my Ilost both my parents like within
(40:41):
six months.
And I remember during that time,like that was one of the
loneliest times.
And I really had to reflect andgo, like, where are my people?
Um, during that time when Ineeded them.
And I really had to be honestand look, and I'm like, I've
really taught people that I'mokay, that I'm strong, that I
don't, I'm always the onelistening to them and not
(41:05):
allowing them in over here.
And that was like a hugeeye-opening thing.
Um, so that's definitely a workin progress for me.
But like the rewards of likelearning to surrender, learning
to receive, learning to let myfriends pour into me has been
like one of the greatest gifts.
SPEAKER_01 (41:28):
You know, it's interesting, you guys.
This is um my senses for thiswhole message here.
It again, trust your spiritabout where you're at.
Because it's not a soft, fluffything, somebody said to me, Bob.
It's based on your pastexperience.
Your gut is based on your pastexperience, and so there's this
little voice telling yousomething that I mean you're
(41:49):
ignoring.
So what are you ignoring?
Um, and the other cool thingabout this I just listened to a
podcast by Taylor Welch.
Taylor Welch, yeah.
It's called The Deep End.
And you want to go deep.
I mean, it's really good.
He says, You know that you are afraction of what you have been
called to be.
And most of this is fear-based.
(42:10):
If we're not providing value,we're afraid of, oh, how are
people gonna perceive me?
If I'm not taking all of the probono opportunities, what are
people gonna think of me?
And and I'm never gonna be ableto make it.
You know, what's the underlyingfear message under there?
If I'm not authentic.
Um somebody else said to me justrecently, when you're not being
(42:33):
your true self and who you'vebeen called to be, it it's a
very lonely life because youspend so much time trying to be
somebody else.
There's so much effort andenergy put into being somebody
else.
And then the law of influence islike the influence grows as you
place others' interest first.
So I I love that is likeunleash, give yourself the
(42:57):
permission to receive and to saythank you.
I love what you said.
I think you said it, Kelly orCarla, kind of together.
You said, Look, I want to give.
You know, there's some peoplesay, Well, Bob, you don't have
to pay.
I said, I want to give.
Let me give.
And they they kind of backed offa little bit.
(43:18):
And um, but I just had to bemore intentional about when I
want to give, I want to give.
Because you are you're cuttingsomeone else off from sharing
their old gifts.
I think that was really uh veryinsightful, Kelly.
Really cool.
SPEAKER_03 (43:29):
Yeah, so good.
SPEAKER_02 (43:32):
I'm also still thinking about the relationship
part though, Carla, where whatyou said about you had trained
people to to that you were justokay.
I think that's really huge.
And I think you could look intoevery dynamic of relationship
that we can have, and you know,marriage or partners, children,
(43:54):
teammates, coworkers, clients,and like look at um look at that
give and take and how um there'sa place in in every one of those
relationships to to probablyfind more ways to give or
receive, you know, look at thethat balance.
And that, you know, I can thinkof um times for sure I've done
(44:14):
that in in my marriagerelationship where I mean
there's lots of ways that wereally good at that, but there's
some places where you knowyou're you're not allowing that
flow back, you know.
I think that's a reallyimportant place to be honest um
with ourselves too.
SPEAKER_03 (44:29):
That's a place that I feel like we have been
navigating a lot.
Like my husband just keepstelling me, like, he received he
receives when I can receive hislove.
Like, you know, when I allow hislove, him to shower his love,
like is when he feels the mostloved.
(44:52):
And like it's kind of a trip,right?
Like it's it's like messes withyour mind.
Um but so beautiful.
SPEAKER_01 (45:01):
My wife is so smart, she's she's amazing.
She said, because she's the sameway, she's a giver, she is
generous to the max, and otherpeople want to give to her.
And she said, wait a minute, youknow what?
If I don't want to receive, isthat all about me?
Oh, I feel shame, or I feelembarrassed, or I feel yeah.
I think it is an ego thing.
It is an ego.
SPEAKER_02 (45:22):
Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (45:24):
Totally.
SPEAKER_02 (45:24):
And that'd be the last thing she'd want to be.
It's not coming from that in herheart, but it's it it is what it
is, you know.
It comes from ego.
Yeah, and that's I think thereal key to understanding that
is what it's like, whoa, that'sthat's not where I want to be at
all.
Like, I, you know, I want peopleto be able to shine their gifts
too, and um, that just shiftsthe whole thing, but it does
(45:46):
take an awakening to that, andprobably multiple times, you
know.
SPEAKER_03 (45:52):
Yeah, so true.
So maybe in closing, where doyou want to go?
How should we close?
Tell everybody read the book.
Yeah, read the book for sure.
Which one feels most like alive,edgy for you to like sort of
(46:13):
play with, go deeper with?
SPEAKER_01 (46:18):
I'll say the one.
I think the authenticity.
SPEAKER_03 (46:23):
Authenticity.
SPEAKER_01 (46:24):
Because how many of us are acting differently at
work than we are at home, orvice versa?
And we're flexing and spending alot of effort trying to be
someone that we think should weshould be, or that other people
have been telling us we need tobe, instead of being who you're
called to be.
Yeah, and when there is so muchfreedom in allowing your work to
(46:47):
come out of that authenticitypiece and finding your way
there.
And that when you feel a rub atwork, when you're feeling stress
and you can't sleep and you'reputting in too much effort, it
may be a values clash of what'simportant.
SPEAKER_03 (47:06):
Yeah, well, and in the book, the authenticity of
the story of Deborah Davenport,right?
Like she had kind of gonethrough hardship and then into
real estate and kind ofdiscovering that like the
greatest thing she had to offerwas herself, right?
And that story was so inspiring.
That that that's the edgiest onefor me too, Bob.
Even like even on this podcast,like I know that there's like
(47:30):
another level of authenticity ofthe podcast that I want to go
to.
Like I've been in a place ofsort of like teaching and
sharing lessons and things thatI've learned, but there's
another layer of just likesharing my life.
You know, I've had clients say,like, I just want to get in your
head and your heart and see howyou think.
(47:51):
And I haven't known how totranslate that in the podcast,
but I it is authenticity.
And like that's that's the one Iwant to play with the most, too.
SPEAKER_01 (48:03):
It's so much freedom.
SPEAKER_03 (48:05):
So much freedom.
So much freedom.
Can you handle it?
SPEAKER_01 (48:11):
Probably not, Kelly.
SPEAKER_02 (48:14):
Kelly, how about you?
I I'm feeling um well, first ofall, I'm reading the next book,
The Leader.
So I want to see how Go GiverLeader.
Yeah, the go-giver leader.
Um, because I I want to see, Ithink I'm blind to some of it in
with my team to some extent.
(48:34):
I think I think I have somepieces kind of in the business.
Um I'm gonna look at it withpersonal relationship and then
also as a leader, but in thisspecific group of five, um, I
think it's number two.
And I think it's, you know, I'mplaying with the Facebook group
and even playing with like waysthat I can help people in a
different way in the business.
(48:55):
And um so I feel like law ofcompensation and your income is
determined by how many peopleyou serve and how well you serve
them.
I think I'm playing in thatarea.
I feel like authenticity, likethat is probably my top value in
life.
So I feel like I've got a lot ofthat in my business already.
And um I feel it's say that Ireally align with that one.
(49:17):
Um, but the law of compensationis is the one I think I'm
playing with the most.
And I'm looking forward toseeing how it goes in the
Facebook group and just open toum where we go with that.
I think it's gonna be reallyfun.
That's beautiful.
SPEAKER_03 (49:32):
Okay, I think that concludes our conversation.
Um, I hope that it inspired yourthinking or stirred your
thinking or makes you want to goget the book.
Go get the book.
SPEAKER_01 (49:45):
And just for the listeners, this was not
scripted.
SPEAKER_03 (49:49):
No, at all.
They didn't even know we weregonna do this today.
Exactly.
SPEAKER_01 (49:54):
It was like you put the five laws up there as a
summary, and we're going, okay,here we go.
SPEAKER_02 (49:59):
I have an idea, guys.
That's how this whole thinggoes.
I have an idea, guys, fromCarla.
And they were like, let's go.
SPEAKER_03 (50:06):
So true.
Thanks for playing.
All right, thanks for tuninginto our mastermind.
It was fun to have you here.
And go get the book.
We'll put a link in the shownotes and to Kelly and um Bob's
work too.
So all right, guys, thanks forplaying.
SPEAKER_01 (50:24):
It was fun.
SPEAKER_03 (50:28):
Thank you for making it all the way to the end, and
thank you for listening todifferently.
If you enjoyed this episode,will you please still leave a
five-star review and share itwith someone you love?
Goodbye for now.
I'll see you next week.
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