Reclaiming Direction and Purpose in the Pursuit of Positive Mental Health

Can A Lack Of Purpose Contribute To Mental Health Challenges, And What Steps Can Someone Take To Rediscover Their Purpose?

Find the path to mental clarity and purpose with us on the Doves Inner B.E.A.U.T.Y. Podcast. Join me, Garfield Bowen, and our insightful guest, Demetria Nickens, as we examine the pivotal role personal values play in shaping mental health, especially for young adults. Discover the practical steps to understanding your core personal values and how family and guardians influence your sense of direction. Demetria, a trauma recovery coach and certified mental health first aid instructor, provides invaluable guidance on how to regain focus and align your decisions with your true self. Through self-reflection, we explore how identifying strengths and weaknesses can lead to a more profound self-awareness and mental well-being.

Learn how embracing personal freedom as a key value can revolutionize your decision-making and transform your life. We explore the significance of understanding what truly matters to you and how prioritizing these values can catalyze meaningful change. This episode is all about reconnecting with your purpose and embarking on a journey of personal growth and emotional awareness. Whether you're seeking to overcome a sense of being lost or looking to reaffirm your life's direction, we're here to guide you toward a more fulfilled, balanced life, with actionable insights and encouragement.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:04):
Welcome to the Doves Inner Beauty Podcast, where we
foster emotional awareness oneindividual at a time.
Leading the way is DemetriaNickens, a certified mental
health first aid instructor andtrauma recovery coach with over
two decades of experience infostering emotional awareness in
others by engaging their mentalhealth.

Speaker 2 (00:33):
Explore the connections between a lack of
purpose and mental healthstruggles, and learn actionable
steps to regain clarity anddirection.
Demetria Nickens offers acompassionate insight and
guidance for finding meaningafter feeling lost.
Welcome back everyone.
This is Garfield Bone, co-host,slash producer, back in the

(00:54):
studio with coach DemetriaNickens.
Demetria, how are you doing?

Speaker 3 (01:00):
Feeling great, great, great, thank you.

Speaker 2 (01:04):
So, demetria, can a lack of purpose contribute to
mental health challenges andwhat steps can someone take to
rediscover their purpose?

Speaker 3 (01:13):
There are studies out not many, but if you research
it, there's some studies outthere that say that, let's say,
college level age kids, right.
When I think about thesestudies, they're always college
level, 18 to 25.
And they say that students thatreported not having a sense of
direction, not having this ideaof sense of purpose, also

(01:35):
reported anxiety, lack of sleep.
They reported this idea ofbeing a little lower on the
spectrum of mental health, right, so going more towards
challenge versus healthy.
And so when we think aboutpurpose, right, and being able
to decide, okay, well, if we canthink about this purpose, then
we can have better mental health.

(01:56):
Well, how do we do that?
So we think about that.
You have to really break itdown.
And I always like to start withthis idea of values.
And it sounds really easy, butwhen's the last time you thought
about your top five values inyour life, the things that
define who you are, thedecisions you make, what you do
on a daily basis, right?
And so when I think about okay,well, let's start with values,

(02:18):
right, what are your top fivevalues?
Is it family, is it health?
Is it spirituality?
What are those values, right?
Is it family?
Is it health?
Is it spirituality?
What are those values right?
What are those things that youknow are the top five values,
that kind of drive yourdecision-making, that drive kind
of who you are right.
When you start with values, youhave a foundation, this idea of
okay, these five things matterthe most to me.

(02:40):
So let's say, I don't know,health is one of them, and you
know that health is a top fivevalue.
How does that value translatein your life?
Does that mean you eat healthy?
Does that mean you tell othersto eat healthy?
Does that mean that youexercise?
What does that look like, right, when someone speaks on health?
Do you speak on health, right?

(03:01):
What does that look like whensomeone's saying something
incorrect?
Do you change that voice, right?
What does that look like foryou?
And so that helps lead anddirect into how you move through
this life, which actually leadsand directs to this idea of
purpose.
So that's one way.
Another way is thinking aboutyour traits and characteristics
right.
What makes you you Thinkingabout these things that are

(03:23):
positive, self, when you thinkabout who you are and the things
that you know you do well,whatever those things are Right,
could you make a list of thosethings you do well and then
think about things and this isthe harder part for most people.
What are the things that youjust know you're not good at All
?
Right, you just know you knowwhat Not good at this thing.
It is what it is.

(03:44):
It's a part of who I am andbeing honest with yourself in
those things.
So when you can think aboutthose traits and how they differ
and kind of come together, thenit also kind of shapes like
okay, I know I'm good at this,Not necessarily good at this,
great, and you can get people tohelp you with that.
Connections are another way tofigure it out.
Your connections help shapeyour values, right?

(04:05):
Your parents, whoever raisedyou, guardians what that looks
like.
They help shape what yourvalues are.
So your connections also helpshape what that purpose may be
for your life, right, but is ityour purpose or is it the one
that your parents or thoseguardians shaped for you?
And so really understanding whoyou are as an individual helps

(04:27):
you get to this idea of purpose.
And so this is how I would helpwalk people through this idea of
purpose, right Helping tounderstand who they are.
Who are you truly?
Where is your authenticity ofyou versus where someone else's
influence comes in or has comein and changed what you really
want to do and what you really,who you feel, like you are as a

(04:49):
person and so, thinking aboutthose things you know when I
think about, you know, oh, yourvalues, your traits, like.
You know what makes you tick,what doesn't, you know what
doesn't, what isn't beneficialto you, who are the connections
in your life.
All those things put togetherreally help to form this idea of
purpose for your life and say,oh, okay, well, what is it that

(05:12):
I want to do from these things,these ideas that I have all
together, these thoughts, thesepieces of who I am?
They can help shape what thatlooks like for me, moving
forward with purpose.
And so it's kind of interestingto see it all come together for
someone, when it really doescome together like the light
bulb that comes on, when theyreally see how it shapes them

(05:33):
and puts perspective into theirlife.

Speaker 2 (05:35):
I guess it's a lot of self reflection.

Speaker 3 (05:42):
Yes.

Speaker 2 (05:42):
What role does that play in rediscovering one's
purpose?

Speaker 3 (05:47):
Yes, absolutely.
It's a great way to say it.

Speaker 2 (05:50):
What's the first step someone can take today to begin
reconnecting with their purpose?

Speaker 3 (05:58):
I would say do a values assessment.
There's some really quick valueassessment free online tools.
I would just say search it, doa top five value assessment.
Do a quick Google search.
You'll find a quick, free thingyou could do and really figure
out what those top five are foryou.
That is a really good firststep because I bet you would be

(06:20):
surprised at what you see yourtop five values are.
People think they know oh yeah,family is in there and friends
and spirituality, and you knowthey think they know.
But when they really assess it,when you really get down to it
and really start thinking thisagainst this do I value
accountability versus honesty,right?

(06:43):
Do I value achievement in myjob versus just getting the job
done right?
Things like that, when peoplereally start putting these two
things together, they get reallyshocked about when you have to
really narrow it down intothings.
Is this more important thanthis right?
Is respect more important thansomething else?
Right?
And it's really shocking whenyou can get down to the nitty

(07:05):
gritty of those five.
You know, does my freedommatter more than you know?
Just civil justice foreverybody else, right?
It's very shocking to kind ofreally understand where you feel
like you are once you get downto those top five.
You know, does this mean moreto me than this?
I would start there, right,because that tells you a lot
about you and really moves youin a whole different direction

(07:28):
of thought and perspective andhow you think and make decisions
in your life.
I bet it would really changehow you move through the world
with that evaluation of values.

Speaker 2 (07:41):
And I'm just thinking as you're talking, over the
last 10 years of politics.
I think everybody's looking forclarity.

Speaker 3 (07:50):
Yes, especially in these times.
Yes, absolutely no.
In these times it matters,right, and it'll help drive you
too right.
When you feel clarity onfeeling like freedom matters to
me, right, and you see all thethings that are going on and you
recognize that your freedom isbeing jeopardized, then you

(08:10):
decide one way or the other,that you want to do something
about it.
Right, you start to makedecisions based on the things
that you know genuinely matterto you.
It is just the nature of who weare as people, and so when you
really get those things bottleddown to like, yeah, these are
the things I genuinely careabout and you know, you will
start to make decisions based onthose things and it will change

(08:31):
your life.

Speaker 2 (08:34):
So you all need to get reconnecting with our
purpose now.

Speaker 3 (08:39):
Absolutely.

Speaker 2 (08:40):
Love it.
Catch you on the next episode.
You have a wonderful rest ofthe day.

Speaker 3 (08:44):
Thank you, thank you episode.

Speaker 1 (08:50):
You have a wonderful rest of the day.
Thank you.
You too.
Thank you for tuning into theDoves Inner Beauty podcast,
where we foster emotionalawareness, one individual at a
time.
For a complimentaryconsultation, visit
DovesInnerBeautycom or call336-298-6599.
That's 336-298-6599.
That's 336-298-6599.