February 19, 2025 • 14 mins
Have you read The Power of Habit, by Charles Duhigg? It’s a GREAT primer on how to change a habit.
Join me on today’s episode where I use the concepts in the book to detail out how to change a habit–and how the habit loop described in the book relates to the self coaching model I teach.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Lisa (00:00):
This is the eat well, think well, live well podcast.
(00:02):
I'm Lisa Salisbury.
And this is episode 135 smallhabits, big results.
What really drives change.
Welcome to eat well.
Well, the podcast for busy womenwho want to lose weight without
constantly counting, tracking,or stressing over every bite.
I'm Lisa Salsbury, a certifiedhealth weight loss and life
(00:24):
coach, and most importantly, Arecovered chronic dieter here.
You'll learn to listen to yourbody and uncover the reasons
you're reaching for food.
When you're not truly hungry,freeing you to focus on a
healthier, more fulfillingapproach to eating.
Hi, welcome back to the podcast.
So glad you tuned in today.
I recently re read the book ThePower of Habit by Charles Duhigg
(00:47):
for my monthly book club.
Shout out.
Love, love my new book club.
We've just met a few times, butthis one we picked for January
and it's is a great one.
It's a great little book full ofstories about how habits are
ingrained in our everyday lives,our communities, and all the way
up to like business andcorporate behavior.
I listened to this one, um,which was nice because it does
(01:10):
flow in kind of like a storyformat.
but then I bought the printversion so that I could
highlight.
So there is lots of informationabout how to create new habits
and really why you want to builda life around habits because
essentially, spoiler alert, itjust makes things so much
easier.
So the main idea in the book isthe Cue Routine Reward Cycle or
(01:35):
what's called the Habit Loop.
And I want to use this idea totalk about how we can use the
power of our own habits tochange what we eat and leverage
that to lose weight.
So the Cue routine reward habitloop cycle says that for every
craving, there is a Cuesomething that tips us off to
(01:55):
wanting the thing.
So whether that's a habit ofnail biting or eating a cookie
in the afternoon, there is a Cuethat starts the cycle.
Then we go through the routineof going to the pantry or the
break room and grabbing thatcookie or the snack, and then we
get the reward.
Usually it's a little bit ofdopamine from the sugar, but the
(02:15):
reward can also be taking abreak, or the chatting with the
co worker, so socializing thatcomes with going to the break
room.
What I noticed is that Duhigg'scue routine reward cycle closely
matches the thought model I use,where the cue is the thought and
feeling together, the routine isthe action line, and the reward
(02:40):
is the result line.
So if you are practiced at usingthe model that I teach, you can
see how these really go togetherquite nicely.
You have a thought like, Oh,it's three o'clock, or I need a
break, or I could really go fora cookie right now.
And that gives you the feelingof a craving and that together
is your cue.
(03:01):
You get up and you go seek outthat cookie, maybe chatting with
a coworker that meets you there.
This is your action line.
You feel like you've had a nicebreak from work and that is your
reward and it goes in the resultline.
So the first thing to do whenyou want to change a habit is to
notice.
Notice when you are in thesetypes of habit loops that are
(03:23):
hindering you from achievingyour goals.
If you are trying to loseweight, and you've decided, as
many of my clients do, to beefup your lunch so that you are
not needing an afternoon snack,you still need to address that
habit loop that will happen at 3o'clock.
The habit of eating a cookieevery day at 3 o'clock.
And this is an example, I'lltell you, this is an example he
(03:43):
uses in the book.
So, um, But I see this with myclients a lot as well.
So even if you aren't hungry fora cookie, you'll want to notice
what else is going on anddriving that habit behavior.
Habit eating is a tricky one toget on top of because you can do
it as easily as brushing yourteeth in the morning.
That is without even thinkingabout it.
(04:04):
One great way to start noticingwhen you are eating out of habit
is to write down your food.
Ah, there she goes again withthe food journaling.
I know, I know, but this iswhere we can really get some
leverage and around what needsto change.
I know I talk about foodjournaling like constantly, but
it's just essential.
(04:26):
So the first couple of weeks Iwork with a client, I I often
just have them write downeverything they're eating so we
can identify patterns withoutmaking any changes.
What are you eating?
When are you eating?
What are you choosing?
You know the saying, we can'timprove what we don't measure,
or something like that.
It's impossible to know whatneeds to change if a lot of your
(04:49):
eating is done from habit.
This goes for time of day andchoices, but also habit serving
sizes.
We need to look at everything.
So once you've identified ahabit in your eating that you
want to change, we want to lookfor the cue.
What is driving that habit?
Perhaps it's when you walk inthe door from work, you
(05:11):
immediately go to the kitchenfor a snack, regardless of your
hunger level.
the cue is coming home, and alsoThat can be a tricky transition
time when we are changing frombeing a working woman to a mom
or wife role.
So not only are you coming homeand there is a change of
surroundings, but also you aremost likely changing roles.
(05:32):
So this can be a trickytransition time and it can be
your cue to get a snack.
Your routine is to check thepantry and eat what you find.
And then the reward is that easeof tension you are feeling from
the transition that is causing alittle bit of unrest.
Duhigg says that, quote, habitscannot be eradicated.
(05:54):
It must instead be replaced.
And we know that habits are mostmalleable when the golden rule
of habit change is applied.
If we keep the same cue and thesame reward, a new routine can
be inserted.
So that's interesting, right?
So what else could you do uponcoming home, which is your cue,
(06:16):
that would also give you thesame reward of easing the
tension from your transition toyour home role?
Perhaps a couple minutes ofalone time in your room before
starting in on home chores.
Perhaps you have some flavoredseltzer water and sit for a
couple minutes doing deepbreathing and drinking your
fizzy drink.
If you come home to a house fullof loud and demanding kids, Um,
(06:38):
and I say demanding, meaningthey are wanting their needs met
right away.
Not that they're like naughty.
I love your kids.
You love your kids.
Um, this few minutes of calmmight not be possible.
So, I get that.
You'll have to get creative.
Maybe you take your mini breakin the car, in the garage,
before going inside.
So as you are looking to changeyour habits, get creative about
(07:00):
what the reward is that you arelooking for.
And then ask yourself, what elsebesides a snack?
Another concept from the bookthat I loved is the small wins.
They are exactly what they soundlike, just very tiny things that
of course will add up.
He says, once a small win hasbeen accomplished, forces are
(07:24):
set in motion that favor anothersmall win.
Small wins fuel transformativechanges by leveraging tiny
advantages into patterns thatconvince people that bigger
achievements are within reach.
So I love this concept againbecause this is how I coach my
clients.
I have had testimonials that saythey didn't even realize how
(07:45):
much they were changing until wewent back and reviewed where
they started 12 weeks ago.
We make tiny little changes eachweek and it sometimes feels so
small that it was so easy, theywonder why they're even doing
it.
one way this works is when Iassign you to do just, for
example, say, plan yourbreakfast each day this week,
(08:06):
that seems so easy that midweekyou start planning your lunch as
well.
The wins are so small that itmakes you think, I could
probably do a bit more.
Now, as you are changing habits,you are going to come up
against.
Willpower.
As much as I will work with youwhen you are my client about
your thoughts and feelings andhelping you to choose those
intentionally, sometimes youwill feel like you are just
(08:29):
using your grit or determinationor willpower.
It's that feeling of holding ontight, and it's also that
feeling that comes with strictrestriction.
The trouble with willpower isthat there have been over 200
studies showing that willpowerisn't just a skill.
Duhigg says it's a muscle, likethe muscles in your arms or
(08:51):
legs, and it gets tired as itworks harder.
So there's less power left overfor the other things.
The takeaway here is that themore we can get our healthy
habits Delegated down to ourlower brain when we are doing
them by habit the less willpowerwe will have to use When you are
(09:12):
first learning a new habit Itmight take a little bit more
willpower to accomplish andthat's a major reason why Why we
do this in tiny increments.
Remember small wins?
Actually, let me give you ascenario that you're probably
familiar with.
January 1st, you decide enough'senough.
(09:32):
It's time to get healthy.
I'm going to put that in airquotes.
You clean out your pantry, throwaway all the holiday goodies
that are still hanging around.
You go online, purchase some newworkout clothes and decide this
is the year.
You will finally run that halfmarathon.
You download a running app.
You set your alarm for the next.
Stay You make a grocery listfrom that influencer you saw
Offering free meal plans,guaranteed to lose 10 pounds
(09:54):
this month This is going to beyour year Oh, and it's January,
so obviously, you'll do dryJanuary Can't lose weight if
you're still drinking wine,right?
And then a few days in, you missa run.
Someone brings lunch into theoffice you weren't planning on,
and then you get invited out toa girls night to celebrate
Michelle's birthday.
(10:14):
Are you seeing yourself in thisstory?
Has this happened to you?
does this happen to you everyJanuary 1st or April 1st or
September 1st?
Insert new starting date here.
Based on what I've talked aboutso far in this episode, do you
see the problem with thisscenario?
First, you didn't give yourselfany time to observe your current
habits.
(10:34):
You probably had some goodroutines going that you just
threw out because you decided tooverhaul your entire life.
You didn't look at any of yourcurrent Q routine reward cycles
to see what can be replaced withsome of your new desires.
Secondly, you tried to changeevery single habit at one time.
You try to completely changeyour workout routine, your
(10:55):
eating habits, and your sociallife.
This is a twofold problem.
One, you aren't going to buildup enough small wins to make you
believe that you can continue.
And two, you're going to run outof willpower.
It takes too much willpower tomake all these changes at once.
And so by the evening or by theweekend.
You.
Are.
Spent.
(11:17):
You also didn't create anystrategies for when things don't
go your way.
I've done a whole episode in thepast about obstacles and
strategies, and it really is anentire episode worth of
information, so I will link thatin the caption.
Duhigg does touch on this a bitin the book as well, noting that
certain patients in recoveryfrom knee replacements did the
best when they wrote down waysto handle a specific moment of
(11:38):
anticipated pain.
And in this case, a successfulpatient detailed every obstacle
he might confront.
(12:03):
For changing health behaviors,these moments of pain are when
you are in a social situationand you want to stick to your
plan, or maybe you would getinvited to do something during
the time when you already had aworkout planned.
Or your kid just gets sick andyou have to stay home and things
go awry.
What do you do in those moments?
Lastly, on habit change, Duhiggsays, For a habit to stay
(12:26):
changed, people must believechange is possible.
And most often, that belief onlyemerges with the help of a
group.
If you want to change a habit,you must find an alternative
routine, and your odds ofsuccess go up dramatically when
you commit to changing as partof a group.
Belief is essential, and itgrows out of a communal
(12:48):
experience, even if thatcommunity is only as large as
two people.
Many times I notice that clientsdon't have the sense of belief
yet.
They aren't sure that they canfinally change their lifestyle
or habits to accomplish realweight loss.
I will tell you what I tellthem.
You can depend on my beliefuntil you believe for yourself.
(13:09):
If you have an accountabilitypartner, that's great.
But honestly, there's no bettercommunity of two to change a
habit than with a life coach.
This is what we specialize in.
Not only will I help you changeyour habits, I can help you
change your belief about beingable.
To change your habits last week,my client just said offhand.
Oh yeah.
I've lost 25 pounds working withyou.
(13:31):
I was shocked because I don'tcheck on weight every week or
anything.
It's not like we do weigh ins,but there were so many other
positive changes this client hadexperienced that we had focused
on.
Um, that I actually had no ideathat she had lost that much
weight.
And I think that just shows thepower of the small wins, taking
it a little at a time andprioritizing real habit change
(13:53):
over complete overhauls thatrequire an intense amount of
willpower.
If these insights resonate withyou and you're ready to make
lasting changes in your healthjourney, I'd love to help first
download my what to do when youovereat resource.
This is a three part videoseries, plus a workbook that's
free just for my podcastlisteners.
You can also book a free consultsession to see if my 12 week.
(14:17):
One on one coaching program isright for you.
Schedule that at the link in theshow notes.
Remember, it's not just aboutthe food.
It's about empowering yourselfwith the choices that truly
serve you.
Have a great week.
And as always, thanks forlistening to the eat well, think
well, live well podcast.
This is the eat well, think well, live well podcast.
(00:02):
I'm Lisa Salisbury.
And this is episode 135 smallhabits, big results.
What really drives change.
Welcome to eat well.
Well, the podcast for busy womenwho want to lose weight without
constantly counting, tracking,or stressing over every bite.
I'm Lisa Salsbury, a certifiedhealth weight loss and life
(00:24):
coach, and most importantly, Arecovered chronic dieter here.
You'll learn to listen to yourbody and uncover the reasons
you're reaching for food.
When you're not truly hungry,freeing you to focus on a
healthier, more fulfillingapproach to eating.
Hi, welcome back to the podcast.
So glad you tuned in today.
I recently re read the book ThePower of Habit by Charles Duhigg
(00:47):
for my monthly book club.
Shout out.
Love, love my new book club.
We've just met a few times, butthis one we picked for January
and it's is a great one.
It's a great little book full ofstories about how habits are
ingrained in our everyday lives,our communities, and all the way
up to like business andcorporate behavior.
I listened to this one, um,which was nice because it does
(01:10):
flow in kind of like a storyformat.
but then I bought the printversion so that I could
highlight.
So there is lots of informationabout how to create new habits
and really why you want to builda life around habits because
essentially, spoiler alert, itjust makes things so much
easier.
So the main idea in the book isthe Cue Routine Reward Cycle or
(01:35):
what's called the Habit Loop.
And I want to use this idea totalk about how we can use the
power of our own habits tochange what we eat and leverage
that to lose weight.
So the Cue routine reward habitloop cycle says that for every
craving, there is a Cuesomething that tips us off to
(01:55):
wanting the thing.
So whether that's a habit ofnail biting or eating a cookie
in the afternoon, there is a Cuethat starts the cycle.
Then we go through the routineof going to the pantry or the
break room and grabbing thatcookie or the snack, and then we
get the reward.
Usually it's a little bit ofdopamine from the sugar, but the
(02:15):
reward can also be taking abreak, or the chatting with the
co worker, so socializing thatcomes with going to the break
room.
What I noticed is that Duhigg'scue routine reward cycle closely
matches the thought model I use,where the cue is the thought and
feeling together, the routine isthe action line, and the reward
(02:40):
is the result line.
So if you are practiced at usingthe model that I teach, you can
see how these really go togetherquite nicely.
You have a thought like, Oh,it's three o'clock, or I need a
break, or I could really go fora cookie right now.
And that gives you the feelingof a craving and that together
is your cue.
(03:01):
You get up and you go seek outthat cookie, maybe chatting with
a coworker that meets you there.
This is your action line.
You feel like you've had a nicebreak from work and that is your
reward and it goes in the resultline.
So the first thing to do whenyou want to change a habit is to
notice.
Notice when you are in thesetypes of habit loops that are
(03:23):
hindering you from achievingyour goals.
If you are trying to loseweight, and you've decided, as
many of my clients do, to beefup your lunch so that you are
not needing an afternoon snack,you still need to address that
habit loop that will happen at 3o'clock.
The habit of eating a cookieevery day at 3 o'clock.
And this is an example, I'lltell you, this is an example he
(03:43):
uses in the book.
So, um, But I see this with myclients a lot as well.
So even if you aren't hungry fora cookie, you'll want to notice
what else is going on anddriving that habit behavior.
Habit eating is a tricky one toget on top of because you can do
it as easily as brushing yourteeth in the morning.
That is without even thinkingabout it.
(04:04):
One great way to start noticingwhen you are eating out of habit
is to write down your food.
Ah, there she goes again withthe food journaling.
I know, I know, but this iswhere we can really get some
leverage and around what needsto change.
I know I talk about foodjournaling like constantly, but
it's just essential.
(04:26):
So the first couple of weeks Iwork with a client, I I often
just have them write downeverything they're eating so we
can identify patterns withoutmaking any changes.
What are you eating?
When are you eating?
What are you choosing?
You know the saying, we can'timprove what we don't measure,
or something like that.
It's impossible to know whatneeds to change if a lot of your
(04:49):
eating is done from habit.
This goes for time of day andchoices, but also habit serving
sizes.
We need to look at everything.
So once you've identified ahabit in your eating that you
want to change, we want to lookfor the cue.
What is driving that habit?
Perhaps it's when you walk inthe door from work, you
(05:11):
immediately go to the kitchenfor a snack, regardless of your
hunger level.
the cue is coming home, and alsoThat can be a tricky transition
time when we are changing frombeing a working woman to a mom
or wife role.
So not only are you coming homeand there is a change of
surroundings, but also you aremost likely changing roles.
(05:32):
So this can be a trickytransition time and it can be
your cue to get a snack.
Your routine is to check thepantry and eat what you find.
And then the reward is that easeof tension you are feeling from
the transition that is causing alittle bit of unrest.
Duhigg says that, quote, habitscannot be eradicated.
(05:54):
It must instead be replaced.
And we know that habits are mostmalleable when the golden rule
of habit change is applied.
If we keep the same cue and thesame reward, a new routine can
be inserted.
So that's interesting, right?
So what else could you do uponcoming home, which is your cue,
(06:16):
that would also give you thesame reward of easing the
tension from your transition toyour home role?
Perhaps a couple minutes ofalone time in your room before
starting in on home chores.
Perhaps you have some flavoredseltzer water and sit for a
couple minutes doing deepbreathing and drinking your
fizzy drink.
If you come home to a house fullof loud and demanding kids, Um,
(06:38):
and I say demanding, meaningthey are wanting their needs met
right away.
Not that they're like naughty.
I love your kids.
You love your kids.
Um, this few minutes of calmmight not be possible.
So, I get that.
You'll have to get creative.
Maybe you take your mini breakin the car, in the garage,
before going inside.
So as you are looking to changeyour habits, get creative about
(07:00):
what the reward is that you arelooking for.
And then ask yourself, what elsebesides a snack?
Another concept from the bookthat I loved is the small wins.
They are exactly what they soundlike, just very tiny things that
of course will add up.
He says, once a small win hasbeen accomplished, forces are
(07:24):
set in motion that favor anothersmall win.
Small wins fuel transformativechanges by leveraging tiny
advantages into patterns thatconvince people that bigger
achievements are within reach.
So I love this concept againbecause this is how I coach my
clients.
I have had testimonials that saythey didn't even realize how
(07:45):
much they were changing until wewent back and reviewed where
they started 12 weeks ago.
We make tiny little changes eachweek and it sometimes feels so
small that it was so easy, theywonder why they're even doing
it.
one way this works is when Iassign you to do just, for
example, say, plan yourbreakfast each day this week,
(08:06):
that seems so easy that midweekyou start planning your lunch as
well.
The wins are so small that itmakes you think, I could
probably do a bit more.
Now, as you are changing habits,you are going to come up
against.
Willpower.
As much as I will work with youwhen you are my client about
your thoughts and feelings andhelping you to choose those
intentionally, sometimes youwill feel like you are just
(08:29):
using your grit or determinationor willpower.
It's that feeling of holding ontight, and it's also that
feeling that comes with strictrestriction.
The trouble with willpower isthat there have been over 200
studies showing that willpowerisn't just a skill.
Duhigg says it's a muscle, likethe muscles in your arms or
(08:51):
legs, and it gets tired as itworks harder.
So there's less power left overfor the other things.
The takeaway here is that themore we can get our healthy
habits Delegated down to ourlower brain when we are doing
them by habit the less willpowerwe will have to use When you are
(09:12):
first learning a new habit Itmight take a little bit more
willpower to accomplish andthat's a major reason why Why we
do this in tiny increments.
Remember small wins?
Actually, let me give you ascenario that you're probably
familiar with.
January 1st, you decide enough'senough.
(09:32):
It's time to get healthy.
I'm going to put that in airquotes.
You clean out your pantry, throwaway all the holiday goodies
that are still hanging around.
You go online, purchase some newworkout clothes and decide this
is the year.
You will finally run that halfmarathon.
You download a running app.
You set your alarm for the next.
Stay You make a grocery listfrom that influencer you saw
Offering free meal plans,guaranteed to lose 10 pounds
(09:54):
this month This is going to beyour year Oh, and it's January,
so obviously, you'll do dryJanuary Can't lose weight if
you're still drinking wine,right?
And then a few days in, you missa run.
Someone brings lunch into theoffice you weren't planning on,
and then you get invited out toa girls night to celebrate
Michelle's birthday.
(10:14):
Are you seeing yourself in thisstory?
Has this happened to you?
does this happen to you everyJanuary 1st or April 1st or
September 1st?
Insert new starting date here.
Based on what I've talked aboutso far in this episode, do you
see the problem with thisscenario?
First, you didn't give yourselfany time to observe your current
habits.
(10:34):
You probably had some goodroutines going that you just
threw out because you decided tooverhaul your entire life.
You didn't look at any of yourcurrent Q routine reward cycles
to see what can be replaced withsome of your new desires.
Secondly, you tried to changeevery single habit at one time.
You try to completely changeyour workout routine, your
(10:55):
eating habits, and your sociallife.
This is a twofold problem.
One, you aren't going to buildup enough small wins to make you
believe that you can continue.
And two, you're going to run outof willpower.
It takes too much willpower tomake all these changes at once.
And so by the evening or by theweekend.
You.
Are.
Spent.
(11:17):
You also didn't create anystrategies for when things don't
go your way.
I've done a whole episode in thepast about obstacles and
strategies, and it really is anentire episode worth of
information, so I will link thatin the caption.
Duhigg does touch on this a bitin the book as well, noting that
certain patients in recoveryfrom knee replacements did the
best when they wrote down waysto handle a specific moment of
(11:38):
anticipated pain.
And in this case, a successfulpatient detailed every obstacle
he might confront.
(12:03):
For changing health behaviors,these moments of pain are when
you are in a social situationand you want to stick to your
plan, or maybe you would getinvited to do something during
the time when you already had aworkout planned.
Or your kid just gets sick andyou have to stay home and things
go awry.
What do you do in those moments?
Lastly, on habit change, Duhiggsays, For a habit to stay
(12:26):
changed, people must believechange is possible.
And most often, that belief onlyemerges with the help of a
group.
If you want to change a habit,you must find an alternative
routine, and your odds ofsuccess go up dramatically when
you commit to changing as partof a group.
Belief is essential, and itgrows out of a communal
(12:48):
experience, even if thatcommunity is only as large as
two people.
Many times I notice that clientsdon't have the sense of belief
yet.
They aren't sure that they canfinally change their lifestyle
or habits to accomplish realweight loss.
I will tell you what I tellthem.
You can depend on my beliefuntil you believe for yourself.
(13:09):
If you have an accountabilitypartner, that's great.
But honestly, there's no bettercommunity of two to change a
habit than with a life coach.
This is what we specialize in.
Not only will I help you changeyour habits, I can help you
change your belief about beingable.
To change your habits last week,my client just said offhand.
Oh yeah.
I've lost 25 pounds working withyou.
(13:31):
I was shocked because I don'tcheck on weight every week or
anything.
It's not like we do weigh ins,but there were so many other
positive changes this client hadexperienced that we had focused
on.
Um, that I actually had no ideathat she had lost that much
weight.
And I think that just shows thepower of the small wins, taking
it a little at a time andprioritizing real habit change
(13:53):
over complete overhauls thatrequire an intense amount of
willpower.
If these insights resonate withyou and you're ready to make
lasting changes in your healthjourney, I'd love to help first
download my what to do when youovereat resource.
This is a three part videoseries, plus a workbook that's
free just for my podcastlisteners.
You can also book a free consultsession to see if my 12 week.
(14:17):
One on one coaching program isright for you.
Schedule that at the link in theshow notes.
Remember, it's not just aboutthe food.
It's about empowering yourselfwith the choices that truly
serve you.
Have a great week.
And as always, thanks forlistening to the eat well, think
well, live well podcast.
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