January 11, 2025 • 50 mins
Discover how to break free from emotional eating and step into your fullest potential in this powerful episode of Empowered Within. Host Jennifer Pilates welcomes Jessica Procini, founder of Escape From Emotional Eating, a transformative program helping women heal the roots of their emotional eating since 2011.
Jessica shares her inspiring journey from emotional eater to sought-after thought leader, revealing how she overcame her own struggles with food, body image, and self-empowerment. Featured on ABC, CBS, and MindBodyGreen, Jessica's award-winning work has transformed countless lives by helping women embody their excellence and thrive without using food to cope.
Tune in to uncover actionable insights, compassionate advice, and the empowering truth about emotional eating—it’s not about willpower or weight but healing the deeper roots. Whether you’ve struggled with food or simply want to understand emotional eating better, this episode is a must-listen.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:06):
Welcome to Empowered Within, asoul quenching, transformational
podcast that will set your soulon fire through candid and
inspiring conversations.
Leading experts, celebrities,healers, and I share our
journeys of how we've overcomechallenges to living an
empowered life from within.
I'm your host, Jennifer Pilates.
Welcome to another episode ofEmpowered Within.
(00:33):
Hi there and welcome to theshow.
I am honored to have with ustoday's guest, Jessica Proscini.
Jessica is a woman on a mission.
She is the founder and leader ofEscape From Emotional Eating
since 2011.
She has been helping women whostrive for excellence Embody
their full potential by healingthe roots of their emotional
(00:56):
eating.
As a sought after thoughtleader, Jessica's work has
received multiple awards yearafter year from the Institute of
psychology of eating.
And she has been featured innoteworthy media outlets, such
as ABC, CBS, and mind bodygreen.
Welcome to the show, Jessica.
Thank you for having me.
I'm thrilled to be here.
(01:18):
I'm so excited to have you.
We just had, oh my gosh, so muchfun talking about all the places
that we like to vacation and howwe have seashelling in common.
Yes.
I love it.
Well, first of all, first andforemost, congratulations on all
of your success.
You have been helping women totransform and to empower within,
(01:39):
and that is just so amazing andso important.
But let's talk about you and howyou transformed yourself and
became empowered within.
How did you find thiscompassionate line of work,
helping women and healing themfrom emotional eating?
Yeah, well, I love the title ofyour podcast because I really
(01:59):
think it sums up the work that Ido with my clients, specifically
around food.
And I came to this work, kindof.
through synchronicity and a lotof zigs and zags from the
universe, but for a long, longtime, I was an emotional eater
and didn't know it.
To put it very succinctly, I wasvery disempowered in my
(02:23):
relationship with food and mybody for a number of decades,
and food was something that Iwould always reach for when I
was stressed, anxious,overwhelmed, overstimulated,
oversaturated and just didn'treally know how to kind of come
(02:45):
down or come out of a lot ofthose feelings.
And I was, For a long, long timeusing food to cope and I didn't
think there was anything wrongwith it.
You know, I really tried to eathealthy and work out every day
like everyone said you should.
You know, I would just kind ofdo this thing with food when
(03:07):
life would get chaotic andstressful.
But as time went on and lifebecame more and more chaotic and
more and more intense, I startedto realize that this was just my
mode of operation that Eating tocope was what I did.
And it started to happen moreand more out of my control as if
(03:31):
like something was taking overmy body and making it happen to
me.
And when that was happening, Ireally tried to, amplify and
accelerate how healthy I ate andhow much I ate.
Working out I did, but I startedto realize that just made my
relationship with food even morechaotic.
(03:54):
And the more that I tried tocontrol what was out of control
in my relationship with food,the more out of control it
became.
Um, And for many years, like Isaid, I didn't know that I was
an emotional eater because Ithought to be an emotional eater
(04:15):
meant that you had to have acertain amount of weight to
lose.
And for me, you know, it wasonly like 20 to 30 pounds that,
was really kind of hanging on mybody.
So I never really saw myself inthat light.
And I also wasn't eating, 10 or15 bags of something, you know,
at most it was like a whole bagof granola or a whole bag of
(04:39):
This or that, you know healthyoreos kind of like more like
healthy food But I came to learnthat You can overdo it with
healthy food too, and emotionaleating doesn't really have
anything to do with your size,or your shape, or even your
gender, or your socioeconomicstatus.
(05:01):
It doesn't have to do with anyof that.
Emotional eating is using foodto cope, and it happening in a
self destructive, unsupportiveway, and that's what I was
doing.
So, that blew my mind, that Iwas an emotional eater.
And then when I started toaccept that notion, I started to
(05:24):
see a lot of pieces fall intoplace.
Pieces where, the hours andyears I had spent in therapy,
like, why that never reallyhelped me in my relationship
with food, and why, my doctorsnever kind of spoke up or
advocated for me becauseemotional eating isn't a medical
(05:46):
diagnosis.
So a lot of times, fallsunderneath the radar, and we can
often be failed by the medicalmodel because, it's not bad,
quote unquote, enough to have aserious intervention.
So in my relationship with food,I kind of came to this point of
(06:09):
like, do I have to wait until Ihave hundreds of pounds to lose
to feel at peace with food?
Does this actually have to get alot worse for someone,
something, to take my caseseriously?
Because at that point, I felt sochaotic and so out of control
(06:32):
with my relationship with food.
I couldn't even imagine itgetting worse.
I didn't want it to get worse.
And that's when I really startedto take my relationship with
food into my own hands and saylike, enough is enough.
I don't care if I don't fit intothe conventional stereotype or
(06:55):
stigma or things like that.
Like I'm going to Change this.
This has to change.
Like, in order for me tosurvive.
my relationship with food needsto change.
And it was from that point thatinstead of looking outside of
myself, I started to really lookwithin and investigated my
(07:15):
relationship with food from alldifferent sides, the physical,
the mental, my thoughts in myhead, the cravings, the
compulsions that I was having.
And really started to put piecestogether that no one was talking
about, but even so, that no onewas talking about when it came
to the relationship with food.
(07:37):
And that's when I started toreally experience changes to
where now, it's been since 2015that I felt crazy or chaotic in
my relationship with food.
So going on nine years, food isa nourishing asset to me.
I eat when I'm hungry, I stopwhen I'm full.
(08:00):
I rest when I'm tired, I workwhen I'm inspired, like I'm in
healthy alignment, healthybalance when it comes to my
body, food, and my energy, andmy compulsions with food feel so
far in the past that it almostfeels like another lifetime to
me.
but along the way people startedto notice.
(08:24):
how much lighter I was becoming,how much happier, how much more
alive I was when I wasn'temotionally eating.
And they just started coming outof the woodwork and being like,
what are you doing?
Tell me what you're doing.
Like, you look amazing.
And that was where I started toshare, like, you know, I
discovered I was an emotionaleater and this is what I've been
(08:46):
working on.
And then people would grab me bythe arm and be like, you need to
work with me.
Like I'm an emotional eater too.
And that's really where escapefrom emotional eating, got
birthed from was like peoplebeing like, you need to work
with me.
And now it really is such a.
Passion and a mission of mine tohelp other people who, you know,
(09:11):
would never check themselvesinto an eating disorder clinic
and also don't feel supported bythe old model of just eat
healthy and work out more.
You know, I really strive tofill a gap for people who are
looking for support,particularly for high achieving
(09:31):
people who strive for reallyhigh goals.
These are the types of peoplethat I work with.
That's incredible.
And I feel like there's so manypeople that are going to go,
wait, eating a bag of granola.
That's not good.
I would love to dive into that alittle bit more because it got
my mind thinking.
I know that I feel there were somany more emotional eaters,
(09:53):
whether we want to call it thatthey were born or they just
recognize it, especially afterall we've been through the last
four years.
I know myself included, I wasalways someone who would not
eat.
And boy, I became an emotionaleater.
And then I spoke with someoneabout emotionally eating, and
then I really trained myself.
(10:13):
Okay, why?
Like the other day I, I, all ofa sudden was about to whip up
out of nowhere.
I found myself in the kitchenand I was whipping up cookies.
And I'm like, okay, why are wedoing this?
I literally talked to myself.
Okay.
Like you're upset because youthink A, B and C might
transpire.
Okay.
What are we gonna do with thesecookies?
Well, I'm gonna make them andI'm gonna make them into little
(10:35):
balls and I'm put them in thefreezer But I'm gonna have three
little ones tonight because thisis what's going to make me happy
And I was like, okay as long aswe have and so this is how I
ration It was rationalizing thisin my head.
And so I'm wondering if youWalked us through like what is
different about how you'reworking with women and the
incredible amount of successthat you've had Helping.
(10:57):
Yeah So first I want to say it'snot the granola.
That's the problem and it's notthe cookies that are the problem
I believe a life without cookiesisn't really a life worth
living, right?
These are like the little lovelyjoys that we have in our life,
but it's when we're engagingwith food and we've become lost
(11:23):
or disconnected in ourrelationship with ourself.
So for example, back in the daywhen I would eat granola, I
could go through an entire bagin a matter of seconds.
And it wasn't until my hand hitthe bottom of the bag that I
would wake up from this foodtrance being like, Whoa, what
(11:45):
just happened?
Who ate all my food?
And where am I kind of like,Almost like blacking out and
that blackout that kind of foodtrance I'm describing when we've
lost ourselves.
And the truth is that back then,not only was I losing myself, I
would engage in behaviors.
(12:07):
To quite literally lose myself,like it was a daily occurrence
where I felt like I wanted tocrawl out of my own skin, and
I'm not exaggerating, likethat's literally how I felt.
So now, when I eat, I connectwith myself first before I
(12:28):
connect with food.
Meaning, I'm checking in with,well, how hungry am I, you know,
on a scale of 1 to 10, like,where are we?
Even more so, I don't let myselfget super duper hungry where I'm
eating in this, super stressedout, rabid state, like, where I
could, murder someone for ameal.
(12:50):
That's not really an integritywith me anymore.
So.
With food.
Now I'm checking in with myselfbefore I make choices around
food and my choices around foodprioritize.
What's going on in my physicalbody, but also taking into
(13:11):
account what's going on in myemotional body.
Because if there's a lot ofdrama and noise in my emotional
body, it will cut me off from myphysical body.
So, how this then translates tomy work is that I'm constantly
supporting my clients in goingwithin first, instead of going
(13:38):
outside of themselves, wherethere's like a process of
reclamation in their power withfood, but also there's just a
repairing of their connectionwith themselves and their bodies
to the point where they canunderstand themselves.
their language of their physicalbody and their emotional body,
(14:01):
where they're having theirphysical needs met, but they're
also learning and understandingand fulfilling their emotional
needs.
And that one doesn't come at thecost of the other where we're
not you know, eating all of thecookies and then feeling sick in
our bodies or shameful orguilty.
(14:24):
Also where we're, you know, foryour example of like not saying
like, okay, I'm just going tohave two and then we have 20,
right?
That's a disconnect in ourrelationship with ourselves.
So a lot of what my work boilsdown to is.
Reconnecting, repairing ourrelationship with ourselves and
(14:47):
then engaging with food in a waythat's in integrity and in
alignment with the highestversion of ourselves that we
want to be.
I love that.
I love bringing in the alignmentof, in essence, what you're
saying, the body, mind andspirit to be present in our body
because so many of us,especially depending on if
(15:09):
you're an empath or a highlysensitive person, we, you know,
generally from a young age havelearned to disassociate with our
bodies.
Right.
And so learning how to livecomfortably and empowered within
your body is so important.
I love that that's somethingthat you're targeting as part of
your program.
When we look at discovering theroot of where our emotional
(15:34):
eating comes from, how do we dothat?
Where do we go?
What happens?
Well, you come to me becausethis is literally where I've
spent years.
researching and developing andconnecting dots and identifying
patterns that it really hasbecome a core element of my work
(15:55):
with my clients.
So over my own personal journeywith having walked through
emotional eating, But alsothrough over a decade of working
with hundreds of women doing thesame, I started to notice that
there were these patterns,patterns specifically for high
(16:16):
achieving women who strive forreally high goals.
That there were differentflavors, so to speak, but a lot
of similarities.
So I took a lot of these casestudies and research and started
to put them into certaincategories and research.
(16:37):
Lo and behold, that's what wenow call the four roots of
emotional eating.
And what I have always believedwas that the root of emotional
eating really has nothing to dowith food.
Food is just the substance.
It's just the thing that we use.
But a lot of these roots can bewhat Trigger the overs, whether
(17:04):
it's over eating, overworking,over drinking, over
responsibility, over saturation,like all these overs is when we
go past a point of integrity.
So when I first started tointroduce these roots and teach
them and teach my clients aboutthem, I started to notice that
(17:27):
there was Like a major jump intheir results, a major jump in
their healing process.
And we were like cutting offyears of work in the process.
Like what used to take fouryears, then took two years, but
took two years took six monthsand it was.
wild to me.
Because I was literally justsharing what I was seeing.
(17:51):
And then my clients were sayingand literally embodying the
proof.
So all this to say is that theroots of emotional eating lie
much deeper than what we'redoing with food.
What we're doing with food isjust the surface, but there's
deeper roots and they don't haveanything to do with sugar or how
(18:14):
much water you're drinking or.
even whether you have thehealthy cookies versus the toll
house cookies like it doesn'tthat's not what it's about so
much more and so much deeper andwhen we start to see the roots
as more of our shadows, then wecan start to build strengths to
(18:35):
overcome them so that the rootsdon't become our default
mechanism and food doesn'tbecome our coping mechanism.
All right.
I love this.
I love how deep we're goingright now.
So for those that listening, whomay go, wait, we're talking
about shadows.
Like my shadow looks fine.
Dive into that.
What does that mean for you withyour program?
(18:56):
Because shadows is verydifferent for lots of different
people depending on how we'redoing.
working with them.
And I think that's a reallyimportant aspect that you
brought up within your programand your work.
So shadow work and the way thatI work with it is seeing it more
as like weaknesses, but notreally weaknesses.
(19:17):
They're more like the thingsthat we do or patterns or habits
that we have when we're notreally in our right mind, and
we're not really in our bestselves.
So let me give you an example.
So one of the roots of emotionaleating is fear.
On the surface, what this lookslike is eating when you're
(19:38):
stressed, or anxious, oroverwhelmed, or even fearing the
future.
Kind of like what you weresharing in the cookie example of
I'm scared A, B, C, and D aregoing to happen.
So when there's experiences likethis, what I know, what my
clients come to know is thatfear is activated and if left
(20:02):
unmanaged, fear can just wreakhavoc on your life.
It can have you, pick fightswith people you love.
It can have you fire clients ifyou're in business for yourself.
It can have you respond, tothreats.
In a not so nice way.
(20:23):
It's like if fear left unmanagedliterally can make you sick
physically, mentally,emotionally, even spiritually.
So when we know the root of fearthat's activated, we then get to
work in managing it.
So one of the tools that I teachmy clients, is called the fear
(20:43):
flush and for them to reach forthis tool, use this tool.
It's about.
grounding that fear energy andthen being able to restore
balance between thought andfeelings.
So I've had clients who, forexample, I recently had a client
(21:04):
whose mother was going through apretty severe health crisis and
she was just in a lot of fearand anxiety around who could
help her mother because, youknow, Her mother lives in
Florida, and she lives in theNortheast, and she reached for
the Fear Flush, used it, and shesaid within a matter of minutes,
(21:28):
she was getting a call from herbrother, who was volunteering to
take care of their mother, whenhe usually never steps in for
this kind of thing.
So, This is what's availablewhen we manage the fear is like
food didn't even enter theequation.
She wasn't eating all of thefood and then calling her
(21:51):
brother.
She was able to face what wasbothering her, which were her
fears, and then move throughthem to the other side into
action to take care of thesituation without hiding
without.
suppressing without, stuffinghow she really felt.
So this, the fear flush is alsosomething that I'm working on
(22:15):
behind the scenes to bring to mycommunity as a free resource,
because I've really been seeing,especially in recent months that
the fear of our society is justsnowballing.
So You'll have to stay tuned tolike my newsletter and things
(22:36):
like that because, I want to bebringing that tool to more and
more people and I'm working onbringing that forward.
So it's not just in my programs.
Yeah.
That sounds incredible.
It sounds like mindset andsubconscious work.
Some of it.
Yeah.
I try not to put my work into abox because it has a blend.
(22:59):
It has such a unique blend thatit really stands, on the map in
its own.
But, but yes, if we want to usecommon words, it could be called
mindfulness, it could be shadowwork, like all that stuff, all
this child, yeah, like all thisstuff.
It really depends and can becustomized based on the client's
(23:22):
needs.
I think that's really fabulous.
I love and appreciate that.
You're like, don't you dare putme in a box.
I so appreciate that energy fromyou because I'm always like
that.
Someone asked me what you do.
I'm like, you should probablyjust sit down because that's a
half an hour conversation ofwhat I do.
Right.
Yeah.
And you know, very much for whatyou're doing because it really
(23:44):
is like in listening to you now.
And I've been through yourwebsite, which is beautiful and
amazing by the way.
And look through the programsIt's so much more than emotional
eating.
And I really want to make surethat people are aware of that.
And the weight of it, yourprograms, it's so much more,
this is embodiment.
(24:04):
This is empowerment.
And if nothing else, likeplease, and definitely we'll get
your information, but go overand check it out.
And then, you know, definitelysign up for her newsletter
because it's so much more thangoing, but I'm not an emotional
eater.
Right.
Well, maybe today you aren't,but you don't know what's
happening tomorrow.
And maybe it isn't food andmaybe it's, you know, the
(24:26):
reality TV or whatever it is.
It doesn't have to just be foodand that's something else that I
personally have reallyrecognized over the years too.
So I've go through those stepsin my mind of stop, ground, why
are you doing this?
How are you going to try tomanipulate and rationalize this
in your head?
Is it really true?
Or are you trying to bullshityourself and there's nothing
(24:50):
wrong with that.
And I, I think that's sowonderful of you that you want
to bring that fear flush out ofyour program into our society,
because knowing Where we'regoing in society and in our
nation, let alone the world inthe coming days, in the coming
months, not even talking years,that is going to be crucial and
so important.
(25:10):
So I commend you on wanting toshare that with everybody.
I think that's amazing.
So everyone, definitely weshould all be on the list for
this.
Thank you.
Thank you.
One of my favorite quotes, thatI had personally been working
on, but I'll share it herebecause it's just so beautiful,
is a quote from Martha Beck inher book called Diana Herself,
(25:33):
which also number one on mybookshelf, recommended to
everyone.
Being in the unknown withoutfear is the essence of
adventure.
I have goosebumps and tears inmy eyes.
All at the same time.
(25:53):
Wow.
I love that by the way.
I love Martha.
That is what I strive for inevery single day is like, we
don't know what's coming.
And I think this is especiallytrue for those of us who are
self employed is like, we areliving 24 seven in the unknown.
(26:15):
There's no way around that.
And we can choose to.
manage or cope with the unknownby, you know, kind of letting
the worst of ourselves come out.
And for me, that was very mucharound, you know, emotional
eating and even emotionaldrinking, I'll say.
(26:36):
But now that those things arereally behind me, it's okay, the
unknown isn't going to change.
I'm still going to be living 24seven in the unknown.
And I even choose this life,even though it doesn't feel like
I consciously chose it.
It's like my soul chose it, butthat's a different conversation.
(26:58):
But My responsibility in orderto enjoy this life.
is to manage the fear.
And that's everything that mywork with my clients starts
with, is managing the energy,managing the emotional energy.
But it's also something that I'mcontinuing to do day in and day
(27:20):
out, and even upping the anteon, as I can, as a sensitive
too.
Like I could just, you couldjust feel how.
uneasy our world is like howunsafe we're all kind of walking
around if we're really honestwith ourselves.
So that's the quote that I'mjust continuing to live into is
(27:43):
that if I want my days to feellike an adventure, Rather than a
rollercoaster to hell, I need tomanage my fear.
That should be the headline onevery newspaper around the world
right now.
That in and of itself, by theway, would be an incredible
title for a podcast.
Just saying.
(28:04):
Ooh.
Just throwing that out there.
Oh, I like it.
Maybe part two, we'll do ittogether.
I would love that.
It's so crazy.
You just said that.
Cause as you were talking, Iheard my guides popping in and
they're like, y'all can be doingretreats.
Y'all could be doing like, and Iguess it was seeing all this
stuff flash.
So absolutely.
(28:24):
Oh my gosh.
I would love that.
That'd be amazing.
Yeah.
There's because there's so muchof this that is needed.
And obviously that's why thispodcast was born during The,
shutdown and I was guided tothis.
I had never even listened to apodcast a day in my life.
I didn't even know.
And now here we are three yearslater.
And over, I think I did it theother day.
I think it's like over 120countries and I mean, it's just
(28:47):
wild.
I feel so blessed.
I'm so grateful.
Thank you.
So, so honored to be able tomeet people like yourself.
I would have, who I would havenever otherwise necessarily come
across or meet and so it's sucha blessing.
Can I ask you a question?
Sure.
Just to turn the tables, what isone way that you manage your
(29:09):
fear that's like really helpful?
I guess like what is Yeah, letme, I'm just formulating the
question on the fly, but like,what is kind of like, uh, not so
ideal way that, like, almostlike a default that you could
fall into as managing fear?
Like, for me, it was emotionaleating or emotional drinking.
(29:31):
And then, What is like a betterway that you manage beer so that
it doesn't quite literally eatyou alive?
So I guess like what's the theshadow side and then what's the
strength side and how youpersonally manage fear?
I love that and I appreciatethat you kind of turn the tables
there So I would say Idefinitely have been down a
(29:52):
couple of different roads thefirst half of my life It was the
aspect of not eating I can,because my life was so out of
control from a very young agethat I didn't eat and I wasn't a
foodie.
And if anyone knows anytourists, they're foodies, I've
never been a foodie.
(30:13):
It was the exact opposite.
And then as I got into mytwenties and my thirties, it
became drinking and completelynumbing out.
This was before I knew that Iwas in, before I really knew who
I was as an intuitive empath, Inumbed out.
Just numbed out, still noteating, just numbing.
(30:35):
And then fast forward quite abit to knowing who I am and
knowing this healing journeythat I'm on.
I always call it a journeybecause you're going to be
healing until the day you die.
It's just the truth.
Um, I would say during the, andI mentioned this during the pan
pandemic, whatever we want tocall it, the shutdown, that's
when it became about emotionaleating for me.
(30:57):
That's when I can remember a daybeing like, wow, if this is how
it's going to go, then I amhaving a heyday.
And I will say this to be very,this was the flip side of that,
the alcohol all went away.
And at that point, I wasn'treally drinking that often
anyways, as you become usuallymore in tune that kind of falls
to the wayside.
(31:18):
I was drinking organic wines atthat point, but at that point.
I would not have alcohol duringthe pandemic shutdown, whatever
you call it.
I want it to be incrediblyaware.
I was guided to be incrediblyaware of everything that was
going on around me so that Icould see so that I was awake to
(31:38):
everything.
Everything that was happening.
So that's how food entered mylife and, I was like, wow, like
this is what people like.
This is amazing.
and when I say that, it would belike for me eating two slices of
pizza and a salad that wasoverdoing it because I've never
been a foodie.
I can have this.
(31:59):
No food and not even realize it.
So it was that.
Then it became about the bakingcookies.
Then it was, um, maybe some icecream.
Then it was, you know, somefried chicken that it was
comfort.
It was comfort food.
And that's what I, I wascomforting myself through food
because it was no longercomforting myself through
alcohol.
(32:20):
So there had to be this otheroutlet.
And so that happened and yes, Iwas working out.
So the flip side was that atthat point in time, I found and
really recognize somethingcalled pool lattes.
And so I turned my Pilates fromthe land.
At that point, I was locked downin Florida to the pool because
it was so flipping hot of whatyou and I talked about pre
(32:42):
podcast.
I was the only person depressedin Florida during that time.
And I don't use that wordlightly.
I was miserable because I hatebeing hot.
And so the flip side was that Iushered all those efforts into
movement.
So when I feel anxious andespecially again, as a highly,
sensitive person, as anintuitive empath, when I start
(33:04):
to feel that vibration inside, Imove.
I'm either walking in natureoutside or I'm getting in the
pool at that point in time.
That was, became the flip side.
So that's sort of how Inegotiated and was able to
balance it.
So did I put on a few pounds?
Yes.
But it wasn't getting to theother side.
It wasn't really going down thishorrible.
(33:25):
So like you mentioned, I couldkind of justify it.
And then as I met with anemotional eater, I began to
really work with my mindset andI worked on subconscious work
and I worked deeper tounderstand that it wasn't as
much about the pandemic as itwas the environment of where I
was, which goes back tochildhood, which was an
(33:47):
incredibly toxic and abusive andunsafe environment for me.
So it went so deep.
You know, much deeper than thesurface of, oh, the world might
end, than what you're thinking.
And through that, I alsoadopted, and learned this quote
and I share it with a lot of myclients.
And it's similar, but a littledifferent than, than your quote
(34:09):
with Martha is that fear isnothing more than excitement
without breath.
And so I really embody that.
And I'm like, okay, are youreally anxious?
Are you really excited aboutthis?
But you are nervous about theunknown.
And nine times out of 10, that'swhat it's about, right?
(34:30):
Like I am a panicked flyer.
I can't stand, I can't standflying, but I love flying and I
get such a good sleep on aplane.
Okay.
What an oxymoron that is.
Right?
So it's working through thosesides and being able to go
deeper within yourself.
To heal, to transform, to findthat empowerment.
(34:51):
And so that's what I've doneover this period of time.
And now, gosh, I think it'll be,I haven't even had a sip
alcohol, I think since last.
August last shot.
So almost going on here and Icould care less like neither
here nor there.
I do have a lot of substanceabuse and all sorts of stuff in
my families, but it's I so enjoylife and I'm to the flip side
(35:15):
where I do enjoy food where thatfirst half of my life I didn't.
Yeah.
Or I didn't allow myself.
That was the one thing that Icould control.
And so I'm finding that happymedium.
It's finding being in the flow.
Mm hmm.
You know, where is it okay?
And acknowledging that you'renot perfect and that some days
(35:37):
it just is what it is.
And then, you know, then you'regoing to take a step forward
that next day or that nextmoment or, you know, having
grace with yourself is the mostimportant thing for everyone
right now.
What I really love, well, first,like I'm hearing a couple of
different themes in your story,which thank you so much for
(36:00):
sharing.
And I'm, I'm so glad that Iasked because I think a lot of
people will resonate with whatyou shared and even see how like
my experience is a little bitdifferent than your experience
and both are valid and real andone is not better or worse.
I think it's important that wehave that perspective when we
(36:21):
look at our relationship withour health that everybody's
relationships are different andjust because we don't have these
quote unquote rock bottommoments where we, you know, did
10 bags of potato chips or awhole bottle of vodka or
something.
Like if it's not in alignmentwith you, then it's a problem.
(36:43):
Right.
That's like, that's thebeginning and the end of the
argument is like, if it's notsupporting you, then it's not
supporting you.
And that's a problem.
So, but I heard you talk aboutlike, the desire for control,
and then kind of like a, uh,superficial sense of control
(37:03):
through not eating or theneating or drinking.
Then I also heard the need forsafety, particularly in the
unknown, the element of familydynamics coming in, both present
and past.
So all of these, and then evenhow you interpret stimulation in
(37:25):
your body, particularlyemotional stimulation.
That's also a big part ofhealing.
Emotional eating is learning abetter way to manage what we're
feeling in our own bodies.
But also what I really love ishow you could see and you could
(37:45):
hear where you are in yourrelationship with yourself is
that there's.
such a deeper assistance andlike, I will help you through
this than where you were in thepast, where in the past it was
kind of like, I don't know howto help you through this.
We just have to get through it.
(38:05):
Where now it's like, okay, whenwe feel the energy, it means we
need to move.
And that's a really greatexample.
But like for myself, justbecause, you know, we're
different, everybody'sdifferent, I would also abuse
working out.
It was like, I would overeat andthen I would overexercise.
(38:28):
So I didn't really find mybalance with movement.
Until many, many years later on,because I was also kind of
trapped in this cycle of, I haveto work off whatever I just ate.
And that can be very true for alot of women who, are high
achievers, is that we will tendto push ourselves to exhaustion
(38:52):
as a way of like forcingourselves to slow down or turn
off because we don't know how topush the button ourselves.
So I just wanted to make thosehighlights and connections for
the people who are listeningthat Everybody's relationship
with food is different,everybody's coping mechanisms
are even different.
(39:14):
Don't allow yourself to waituntil things get worse before
they get better.
Because, like I said, if it's anissue, if it's causing issues in
your life, if you don't feelhappy and healthy and at peace
with yourself, it doesn't haveto stay that way.
And, like, you got help, I gothelp.
(39:34):
We are help for our clients andthings like that.
And like I said, like it doesn'thave to stay that way and it
doesn't have to get worse.
I agree.
I agree.
It was so beautiful.
Oh my gosh.
This has been so much fun.
I can't even, like, so much tosay.
We could be here for hours.
So I really want to ask you thisone question that I love to ask
(39:56):
guests on our show.
What is one thing that maybe noone knows about Jessica?
Hmm.
I don't know.
I don't know if there's like anydeep secrets.
Oh, it doesn't have to be a deepsecret.
(40:18):
I put a lot of things out intothe world, so I don't know.
I think I need some help, like,narrowing it down.
Can you give me like a Sure.
What is one thing that nobodyknows about the relationship
between you and your fur babies?
Oh my gosh.
So I can talk about my dogs allday every day.
(40:39):
So something that I do with mydogs, and it's actually, A
practice that I share with myclients and invite them to do,
but so in my work with myclients, we talk about self love
and self love being theacknowledgement and the
appreciation and gratitude foryourself, but I use the example
(41:04):
that we engage in love.
We engage in thatacknowledgement, appreciation,
gratitude.
For things and people in ourlives, we just don't really
realize we're doing it and I'lloften give the example of like,
when you look at your dogs, oryou look at your kids, or you
look at something, someone youlove, and you think like, oh,
(41:25):
look how cute they are, or youjust kind of relish in It's a
good thing.
Right.
their adorableness or theirbeauty or, you know, their
energy or whatever it may be.
And that self love is doing thatwith ourselves.
So one of the things that I dooftentimes in the morning is I
will just watch my dogs wake upbecause they just have their own
(41:51):
like morning routine of how theyget out of their own beds.
And Something that I'll do is Iwill, um, I will like lovingly
pet them and in my mind and inmy heart, I'm just sending like
loving energy to them and it'sreally interesting to see how
(42:11):
they receive it as a sensitiveand I believe my Animals are
also extremely sensitive aswell, but it's just really a
beautiful practice of sendingand receiving love, and, um, I
do it because I enjoy it, notbecause I have to, or I'm not
(42:33):
striving for anything, it's justactually for the sake of it.
Really nourishing and enjoyable.
And I know the impact of sendingpositive energy, especially to
animals and other beings.
So Like, that is something thatI do and I, I don't tell anyone
(42:55):
I do it until now.
Until now.
Everyone in the world.
Until everyone over 120countries.
No one knows what you do everymorning.
And I'm, I'm fully read and I amlike, I have, Full body blushing
right now.
I'm so warm and saying thisbecause it, it's such an
(43:17):
intimate practice I have withthem.
And, like I said, I don't, Idon't do it for anything.
I just do it because it feelsgood.
So absolutely.
Oh, I love that you share that.
Thank you.
Us for mamas have to sticktogether.
Yes.
Oh my gosh, this has been soamazing.
As we close out the show today,what is one last piece of
(43:41):
inspiration that you'd like toleave with us?
I would invite people to lookbeyond what they're doing with
food and start to get curious asto what is really going on
beneath the surface.
What are you feeling?
What are you really hungry for?
Because it's these deeperquestions that can unlock the
(44:05):
real doors that hold thetransformation that you're
looking for.
I would also say that there's anexcellent resource and quiz on
my website called the four rootsof emotional eating clarity
quiz.
So if you're looking to take adeeper look at your relationship
(44:26):
with food, find out what'sreally deeply at the core of
some of the food triggers, thatis an excellent resource.
And that comes with a beginner'sguide to start working with the
results that you get from thequiz.
So I would say those two thingsof like, look deeper.
Ask deeper questions.
(44:47):
What am I really hungry for?
What am I really feeling?
What am I seeking to escapefrom?
And then grab that resource onmy website because it's changing
soon because I'm gonna put upthe fear flesh as a resource so
you'll want to get that too.
Wonderful.
Well, that takes us into pleaseshare with us your website so
(45:10):
everyone can go and connect withyou.
That'sescapefromemotionaleating.
com, escapefromemotionaleating.
com.
Great, fabulous.
And of course, all of Jessica'sinformation will be over on the
show notes at jenniferpilates.
com.
So you can head over there, headto her website, grab her
newsletter.
So they grab the free resourcesnow.
(45:32):
So then you can also jump on thefear flush when that comes out
as well.
This has been so amazing, soeducational, and I feel so
empowering for so many peoplearound food, Being able to share
your story, my story, and justwhat we can do to help
ourselves.
as a world moving forward in ourrelationships in all areas,
(45:57):
body, mind, and spirit.
Thank you so much, Jessica.
Thank you for having me and keepdoing the work that you're
doing.
Thank you so much.
I appreciate that.
Well, as we say until next time,may you live an empowered life
from within.
(46:20):
Thank you so much for tuning into another episode.
Please remember to rate, review,and subscribe to Empowered
Within with Jennifer Pilates.
Your feedback is important.
It helps me to connect with youand gives me insight into who
you are and what you're enjoyingabout the show.
For today's show notes anddiscount codes from today's
sponsors, head over tojenniferpilates.
(46:40):
com.
Until next time, may you live anempowered life from within.
Welcome to Empowered Within, asoul quenching, transformational
podcast that will set your soulon fire through candid and
inspiring conversations.
Leading experts, celebrities,healers, and I share our
journeys of how we've overcomechallenges to living an
empowered life from within.
I'm your host, Jennifer Pilates.
Welcome to another episode ofEmpowered Within.
(00:33):
Hi there and welcome to theshow.
I am honored to have with ustoday's guest, Jessica Proscini.
Jessica is a woman on a mission.
She is the founder and leader ofEscape From Emotional Eating
since 2011.
She has been helping women whostrive for excellence Embody
their full potential by healingthe roots of their emotional
(00:56):
eating.
As a sought after thoughtleader, Jessica's work has
received multiple awards yearafter year from the Institute of
psychology of eating.
And she has been featured innoteworthy media outlets, such
as ABC, CBS, and mind bodygreen.
Welcome to the show, Jessica.
Thank you for having me.
I'm thrilled to be here.
(01:18):
I'm so excited to have you.
We just had, oh my gosh, so muchfun talking about all the places
that we like to vacation and howwe have seashelling in common.
Yes.
I love it.
Well, first of all, first andforemost, congratulations on all
of your success.
You have been helping women totransform and to empower within,
(01:39):
and that is just so amazing andso important.
But let's talk about you and howyou transformed yourself and
became empowered within.
How did you find thiscompassionate line of work,
helping women and healing themfrom emotional eating?
Yeah, well, I love the title ofyour podcast because I really
(01:59):
think it sums up the work that Ido with my clients, specifically
around food.
And I came to this work, kindof.
through synchronicity and a lotof zigs and zags from the
universe, but for a long, longtime, I was an emotional eater
and didn't know it.
To put it very succinctly, I wasvery disempowered in my
(02:23):
relationship with food and mybody for a number of decades,
and food was something that Iwould always reach for when I
was stressed, anxious,overwhelmed, overstimulated,
oversaturated and just didn'treally know how to kind of come
(02:45):
down or come out of a lot ofthose feelings.
And I was, For a long, long timeusing food to cope and I didn't
think there was anything wrongwith it.
You know, I really tried to eathealthy and work out every day
like everyone said you should.
You know, I would just kind ofdo this thing with food when
(03:07):
life would get chaotic andstressful.
But as time went on and lifebecame more and more chaotic and
more and more intense, I startedto realize that this was just my
mode of operation that Eating tocope was what I did.
And it started to happen moreand more out of my control as if
(03:31):
like something was taking overmy body and making it happen to
me.
And when that was happening, Ireally tried to, amplify and
accelerate how healthy I ate andhow much I ate.
Working out I did, but I startedto realize that just made my
relationship with food even morechaotic.
(03:54):
And the more that I tried tocontrol what was out of control
in my relationship with food,the more out of control it
became.
Um, And for many years, like Isaid, I didn't know that I was
an emotional eater because Ithought to be an emotional eater
(04:15):
meant that you had to have acertain amount of weight to
lose.
And for me, you know, it wasonly like 20 to 30 pounds that,
was really kind of hanging on mybody.
So I never really saw myself inthat light.
And I also wasn't eating, 10 or15 bags of something, you know,
at most it was like a whole bagof granola or a whole bag of
(04:39):
This or that, you know healthyoreos kind of like more like
healthy food But I came to learnthat You can overdo it with
healthy food too, and emotionaleating doesn't really have
anything to do with your size,or your shape, or even your
gender, or your socioeconomicstatus.
(05:01):
It doesn't have to do with anyof that.
Emotional eating is using foodto cope, and it happening in a
self destructive, unsupportiveway, and that's what I was
doing.
So, that blew my mind, that Iwas an emotional eater.
And then when I started toaccept that notion, I started to
(05:24):
see a lot of pieces fall intoplace.
Pieces where, the hours andyears I had spent in therapy,
like, why that never reallyhelped me in my relationship
with food, and why, my doctorsnever kind of spoke up or
advocated for me becauseemotional eating isn't a medical
(05:46):
diagnosis.
So a lot of times, fallsunderneath the radar, and we can
often be failed by the medicalmodel because, it's not bad,
quote unquote, enough to have aserious intervention.
So in my relationship with food,I kind of came to this point of
(06:09):
like, do I have to wait until Ihave hundreds of pounds to lose
to feel at peace with food?
Does this actually have to get alot worse for someone,
something, to take my caseseriously?
Because at that point, I felt sochaotic and so out of control
(06:32):
with my relationship with food.
I couldn't even imagine itgetting worse.
I didn't want it to get worse.
And that's when I really startedto take my relationship with
food into my own hands and saylike, enough is enough.
I don't care if I don't fit intothe conventional stereotype or
(06:55):
stigma or things like that.
Like I'm going to Change this.
This has to change.
Like, in order for me tosurvive.
my relationship with food needsto change.
And it was from that point thatinstead of looking outside of
myself, I started to really lookwithin and investigated my
(07:15):
relationship with food from alldifferent sides, the physical,
the mental, my thoughts in myhead, the cravings, the
compulsions that I was having.
And really started to put piecestogether that no one was talking
about, but even so, that no onewas talking about when it came
to the relationship with food.
(07:37):
And that's when I started toreally experience changes to
where now, it's been since 2015that I felt crazy or chaotic in
my relationship with food.
So going on nine years, food isa nourishing asset to me.
I eat when I'm hungry, I stopwhen I'm full.
(08:00):
I rest when I'm tired, I workwhen I'm inspired, like I'm in
healthy alignment, healthybalance when it comes to my
body, food, and my energy, andmy compulsions with food feel so
far in the past that it almostfeels like another lifetime to
me.
but along the way people startedto notice.
(08:24):
how much lighter I was becoming,how much happier, how much more
alive I was when I wasn'temotionally eating.
And they just started coming outof the woodwork and being like,
what are you doing?
Tell me what you're doing.
Like, you look amazing.
And that was where I started toshare, like, you know, I
discovered I was an emotionaleater and this is what I've been
(08:46):
working on.
And then people would grab me bythe arm and be like, you need to
work with me.
Like I'm an emotional eater too.
And that's really where escapefrom emotional eating, got
birthed from was like peoplebeing like, you need to work
with me.
And now it really is such a.
Passion and a mission of mine tohelp other people who, you know,
(09:11):
would never check themselvesinto an eating disorder clinic
and also don't feel supported bythe old model of just eat
healthy and work out more.
You know, I really strive tofill a gap for people who are
looking for support,particularly for high achieving
(09:31):
people who strive for reallyhigh goals.
These are the types of peoplethat I work with.
That's incredible.
And I feel like there's so manypeople that are going to go,
wait, eating a bag of granola.
That's not good.
I would love to dive into that alittle bit more because it got
my mind thinking.
I know that I feel there were somany more emotional eaters,
(09:53):
whether we want to call it thatthey were born or they just
recognize it, especially afterall we've been through the last
four years.
I know myself included, I wasalways someone who would not
eat.
And boy, I became an emotionaleater.
And then I spoke with someoneabout emotionally eating, and
then I really trained myself.
(10:13):
Okay, why?
Like the other day I, I, all ofa sudden was about to whip up
out of nowhere.
I found myself in the kitchenand I was whipping up cookies.
And I'm like, okay, why are wedoing this?
I literally talked to myself.
Okay.
Like you're upset because youthink A, B and C might
transpire.
Okay.
What are we gonna do with thesecookies?
Well, I'm gonna make them andI'm gonna make them into little
(10:35):
balls and I'm put them in thefreezer But I'm gonna have three
little ones tonight because thisis what's going to make me happy
And I was like, okay as long aswe have and so this is how I
ration It was rationalizing thisin my head.
And so I'm wondering if youWalked us through like what is
different about how you'reworking with women and the
incredible amount of successthat you've had Helping.
(10:57):
Yeah So first I want to say it'snot the granola.
That's the problem and it's notthe cookies that are the problem
I believe a life without cookiesisn't really a life worth
living, right?
These are like the little lovelyjoys that we have in our life,
but it's when we're engagingwith food and we've become lost
(11:23):
or disconnected in ourrelationship with ourself.
So for example, back in the daywhen I would eat granola, I
could go through an entire bagin a matter of seconds.
And it wasn't until my hand hitthe bottom of the bag that I
would wake up from this foodtrance being like, Whoa, what
(11:45):
just happened?
Who ate all my food?
And where am I kind of like,Almost like blacking out and
that blackout that kind of foodtrance I'm describing when we've
lost ourselves.
And the truth is that back then,not only was I losing myself, I
would engage in behaviors.
(12:07):
To quite literally lose myself,like it was a daily occurrence
where I felt like I wanted tocrawl out of my own skin, and
I'm not exaggerating, likethat's literally how I felt.
So now, when I eat, I connectwith myself first before I
(12:28):
connect with food.
Meaning, I'm checking in with,well, how hungry am I, you know,
on a scale of 1 to 10, like,where are we?
Even more so, I don't let myselfget super duper hungry where I'm
eating in this, super stressedout, rabid state, like, where I
could, murder someone for ameal.
(12:50):
That's not really an integritywith me anymore.
So.
With food.
Now I'm checking in with myselfbefore I make choices around
food and my choices around foodprioritize.
What's going on in my physicalbody, but also taking into
(13:11):
account what's going on in myemotional body.
Because if there's a lot ofdrama and noise in my emotional
body, it will cut me off from myphysical body.
So, how this then translates tomy work is that I'm constantly
supporting my clients in goingwithin first, instead of going
(13:38):
outside of themselves, wherethere's like a process of
reclamation in their power withfood, but also there's just a
repairing of their connectionwith themselves and their bodies
to the point where they canunderstand themselves.
their language of their physicalbody and their emotional body,
(14:01):
where they're having theirphysical needs met, but they're
also learning and understandingand fulfilling their emotional
needs.
And that one doesn't come at thecost of the other where we're
not you know, eating all of thecookies and then feeling sick in
our bodies or shameful orguilty.
(14:24):
Also where we're, you know, foryour example of like not saying
like, okay, I'm just going tohave two and then we have 20,
right?
That's a disconnect in ourrelationship with ourselves.
So a lot of what my work boilsdown to is.
Reconnecting, repairing ourrelationship with ourselves and
(14:47):
then engaging with food in a waythat's in integrity and in
alignment with the highestversion of ourselves that we
want to be.
I love that.
I love bringing in the alignmentof, in essence, what you're
saying, the body, mind andspirit to be present in our body
because so many of us,especially depending on if
(15:09):
you're an empath or a highlysensitive person, we, you know,
generally from a young age havelearned to disassociate with our
bodies.
Right.
And so learning how to livecomfortably and empowered within
your body is so important.
I love that that's somethingthat you're targeting as part of
your program.
When we look at discovering theroot of where our emotional
(15:34):
eating comes from, how do we dothat?
Where do we go?
What happens?
Well, you come to me becausethis is literally where I've
spent years.
researching and developing andconnecting dots and identifying
patterns that it really hasbecome a core element of my work
(15:55):
with my clients.
So over my own personal journeywith having walked through
emotional eating, But alsothrough over a decade of working
with hundreds of women doing thesame, I started to notice that
there were these patterns,patterns specifically for high
(16:16):
achieving women who strive forreally high goals.
That there were differentflavors, so to speak, but a lot
of similarities.
So I took a lot of these casestudies and research and started
to put them into certaincategories and research.
(16:37):
Lo and behold, that's what wenow call the four roots of
emotional eating.
And what I have always believedwas that the root of emotional
eating really has nothing to dowith food.
Food is just the substance.
It's just the thing that we use.
But a lot of these roots can bewhat Trigger the overs, whether
(17:04):
it's over eating, overworking,over drinking, over
responsibility, over saturation,like all these overs is when we
go past a point of integrity.
So when I first started tointroduce these roots and teach
them and teach my clients aboutthem, I started to notice that
(17:27):
there was Like a major jump intheir results, a major jump in
their healing process.
And we were like cutting offyears of work in the process.
Like what used to take fouryears, then took two years, but
took two years took six monthsand it was.
wild to me.
Because I was literally justsharing what I was seeing.
(17:51):
And then my clients were sayingand literally embodying the
proof.
So all this to say is that theroots of emotional eating lie
much deeper than what we'redoing with food.
What we're doing with food isjust the surface, but there's
deeper roots and they don't haveanything to do with sugar or how
(18:14):
much water you're drinking or.
even whether you have thehealthy cookies versus the toll
house cookies like it doesn'tthat's not what it's about so
much more and so much deeper andwhen we start to see the roots
as more of our shadows, then wecan start to build strengths to
(18:35):
overcome them so that the rootsdon't become our default
mechanism and food doesn'tbecome our coping mechanism.
All right.
I love this.
I love how deep we're goingright now.
So for those that listening, whomay go, wait, we're talking
about shadows.
Like my shadow looks fine.
Dive into that.
What does that mean for you withyour program?
(18:56):
Because shadows is verydifferent for lots of different
people depending on how we'redoing.
working with them.
And I think that's a reallyimportant aspect that you
brought up within your programand your work.
So shadow work and the way thatI work with it is seeing it more
as like weaknesses, but notreally weaknesses.
(19:17):
They're more like the thingsthat we do or patterns or habits
that we have when we're notreally in our right mind, and
we're not really in our bestselves.
So let me give you an example.
So one of the roots of emotionaleating is fear.
On the surface, what this lookslike is eating when you're
(19:38):
stressed, or anxious, oroverwhelmed, or even fearing the
future.
Kind of like what you weresharing in the cookie example of
I'm scared A, B, C, and D aregoing to happen.
So when there's experiences likethis, what I know, what my
clients come to know is thatfear is activated and if left
(20:02):
unmanaged, fear can just wreakhavoc on your life.
It can have you, pick fightswith people you love.
It can have you fire clients ifyou're in business for yourself.
It can have you respond, tothreats.
In a not so nice way.
(20:23):
It's like if fear left unmanagedliterally can make you sick
physically, mentally,emotionally, even spiritually.
So when we know the root of fearthat's activated, we then get to
work in managing it.
So one of the tools that I teachmy clients, is called the fear
(20:43):
flush and for them to reach forthis tool, use this tool.
It's about.
grounding that fear energy andthen being able to restore
balance between thought andfeelings.
So I've had clients who, forexample, I recently had a client
(21:04):
whose mother was going through apretty severe health crisis and
she was just in a lot of fearand anxiety around who could
help her mother because, youknow, Her mother lives in
Florida, and she lives in theNortheast, and she reached for
the Fear Flush, used it, and shesaid within a matter of minutes,
(21:28):
she was getting a call from herbrother, who was volunteering to
take care of their mother, whenhe usually never steps in for
this kind of thing.
So, This is what's availablewhen we manage the fear is like
food didn't even enter theequation.
She wasn't eating all of thefood and then calling her
(21:51):
brother.
She was able to face what wasbothering her, which were her
fears, and then move throughthem to the other side into
action to take care of thesituation without hiding
without.
suppressing without, stuffinghow she really felt.
So this, the fear flush is alsosomething that I'm working on
(22:15):
behind the scenes to bring to mycommunity as a free resource,
because I've really been seeing,especially in recent months that
the fear of our society is justsnowballing.
So You'll have to stay tuned tolike my newsletter and things
(22:36):
like that because, I want to bebringing that tool to more and
more people and I'm working onbringing that forward.
So it's not just in my programs.
Yeah.
That sounds incredible.
It sounds like mindset andsubconscious work.
Some of it.
Yeah.
I try not to put my work into abox because it has a blend.
(22:59):
It has such a unique blend thatit really stands, on the map in
its own.
But, but yes, if we want to usecommon words, it could be called
mindfulness, it could be shadowwork, like all that stuff, all
this child, yeah, like all thisstuff.
It really depends and can becustomized based on the client's
(23:22):
needs.
I think that's really fabulous.
I love and appreciate that.
You're like, don't you dare putme in a box.
I so appreciate that energy fromyou because I'm always like
that.
Someone asked me what you do.
I'm like, you should probablyjust sit down because that's a
half an hour conversation ofwhat I do.
Right.
Yeah.
And you know, very much for whatyou're doing because it really
(23:44):
is like in listening to you now.
And I've been through yourwebsite, which is beautiful and
amazing by the way.
And look through the programsIt's so much more than emotional
eating.
And I really want to make surethat people are aware of that.
And the weight of it, yourprograms, it's so much more,
this is embodiment.
(24:04):
This is empowerment.
And if nothing else, likeplease, and definitely we'll get
your information, but go overand check it out.
And then, you know, definitelysign up for her newsletter
because it's so much more thangoing, but I'm not an emotional
eater.
Right.
Well, maybe today you aren't,but you don't know what's
happening tomorrow.
And maybe it isn't food andmaybe it's, you know, the
(24:26):
reality TV or whatever it is.
It doesn't have to just be foodand that's something else that I
personally have reallyrecognized over the years too.
So I've go through those stepsin my mind of stop, ground, why
are you doing this?
How are you going to try tomanipulate and rationalize this
in your head?
Is it really true?
Or are you trying to bullshityourself and there's nothing
(24:50):
wrong with that.
And I, I think that's sowonderful of you that you want
to bring that fear flush out ofyour program into our society,
because knowing Where we'regoing in society and in our
nation, let alone the world inthe coming days, in the coming
months, not even talking years,that is going to be crucial and
so important.
(25:10):
So I commend you on wanting toshare that with everybody.
I think that's amazing.
So everyone, definitely weshould all be on the list for
this.
Thank you.
Thank you.
One of my favorite quotes, thatI had personally been working
on, but I'll share it herebecause it's just so beautiful,
is a quote from Martha Beck inher book called Diana Herself,
(25:33):
which also number one on mybookshelf, recommended to
everyone.
Being in the unknown withoutfear is the essence of
adventure.
I have goosebumps and tears inmy eyes.
All at the same time.
(25:53):
Wow.
I love that by the way.
I love Martha.
That is what I strive for inevery single day is like, we
don't know what's coming.
And I think this is especiallytrue for those of us who are
self employed is like, we areliving 24 seven in the unknown.
(26:15):
There's no way around that.
And we can choose to.
manage or cope with the unknownby, you know, kind of letting
the worst of ourselves come out.
And for me, that was very mucharound, you know, emotional
eating and even emotionaldrinking, I'll say.
(26:36):
But now that those things arereally behind me, it's okay, the
unknown isn't going to change.
I'm still going to be living 24seven in the unknown.
And I even choose this life,even though it doesn't feel like
I consciously chose it.
It's like my soul chose it, butthat's a different conversation.
(26:58):
But My responsibility in orderto enjoy this life.
is to manage the fear.
And that's everything that mywork with my clients starts
with, is managing the energy,managing the emotional energy.
But it's also something that I'mcontinuing to do day in and day
(27:20):
out, and even upping the anteon, as I can, as a sensitive
too.
Like I could just, you couldjust feel how.
uneasy our world is like howunsafe we're all kind of walking
around if we're really honestwith ourselves.
So that's the quote that I'mjust continuing to live into is
(27:43):
that if I want my days to feellike an adventure, Rather than a
rollercoaster to hell, I need tomanage my fear.
That should be the headline onevery newspaper around the world
right now.
That in and of itself, by theway, would be an incredible
title for a podcast.
Just saying.
(28:04):
Ooh.
Just throwing that out there.
Oh, I like it.
Maybe part two, we'll do ittogether.
I would love that.
It's so crazy.
You just said that.
Cause as you were talking, Iheard my guides popping in and
they're like, y'all can be doingretreats.
Y'all could be doing like, and Iguess it was seeing all this
stuff flash.
So absolutely.
(28:24):
Oh my gosh.
I would love that.
That'd be amazing.
Yeah.
There's because there's so muchof this that is needed.
And obviously that's why thispodcast was born during The,
shutdown and I was guided tothis.
I had never even listened to apodcast a day in my life.
I didn't even know.
And now here we are three yearslater.
And over, I think I did it theother day.
I think it's like over 120countries and I mean, it's just
(28:47):
wild.
I feel so blessed.
I'm so grateful.
Thank you.
So, so honored to be able tomeet people like yourself.
I would have, who I would havenever otherwise necessarily come
across or meet and so it's sucha blessing.
Can I ask you a question?
Sure.
Just to turn the tables, what isone way that you manage your
(29:09):
fear that's like really helpful?
I guess like what is Yeah, letme, I'm just formulating the
question on the fly, but like,what is kind of like, uh, not so
ideal way that, like, almostlike a default that you could
fall into as managing fear?
Like, for me, it was emotionaleating or emotional drinking.
(29:31):
And then, What is like a betterway that you manage beer so that
it doesn't quite literally eatyou alive?
So I guess like what's the theshadow side and then what's the
strength side and how youpersonally manage fear?
I love that and I appreciatethat you kind of turn the tables
there So I would say Idefinitely have been down a
(29:52):
couple of different roads thefirst half of my life It was the
aspect of not eating I can,because my life was so out of
control from a very young agethat I didn't eat and I wasn't a
foodie.
And if anyone knows anytourists, they're foodies, I've
never been a foodie.
(30:13):
It was the exact opposite.
And then as I got into mytwenties and my thirties, it
became drinking and completelynumbing out.
This was before I knew that Iwas in, before I really knew who
I was as an intuitive empath, Inumbed out.
Just numbed out, still noteating, just numbing.
(30:35):
And then fast forward quite abit to knowing who I am and
knowing this healing journeythat I'm on.
I always call it a journeybecause you're going to be
healing until the day you die.
It's just the truth.
Um, I would say during the, andI mentioned this during the pan
pandemic, whatever we want tocall it, the shutdown, that's
when it became about emotionaleating for me.
(30:57):
That's when I can remember a daybeing like, wow, if this is how
it's going to go, then I amhaving a heyday.
And I will say this to be very,this was the flip side of that,
the alcohol all went away.
And at that point, I wasn'treally drinking that often
anyways, as you become usuallymore in tune that kind of falls
to the wayside.
(31:18):
I was drinking organic wines atthat point, but at that point.
I would not have alcohol duringthe pandemic shutdown, whatever
you call it.
I want it to be incrediblyaware.
I was guided to be incrediblyaware of everything that was
going on around me so that Icould see so that I was awake to
(31:38):
everything.
Everything that was happening.
So that's how food entered mylife and, I was like, wow, like
this is what people like.
This is amazing.
and when I say that, it would belike for me eating two slices of
pizza and a salad that wasoverdoing it because I've never
been a foodie.
I can have this.
(31:59):
No food and not even realize it.
So it was that.
Then it became about the bakingcookies.
Then it was, um, maybe some icecream.
Then it was, you know, somefried chicken that it was
comfort.
It was comfort food.
And that's what I, I wascomforting myself through food
because it was no longercomforting myself through
alcohol.
(32:20):
So there had to be this otheroutlet.
And so that happened and yes, Iwas working out.
So the flip side was that atthat point in time, I found and
really recognize somethingcalled pool lattes.
And so I turned my Pilates fromthe land.
At that point, I was locked downin Florida to the pool because
it was so flipping hot of whatyou and I talked about pre
(32:42):
podcast.
I was the only person depressedin Florida during that time.
And I don't use that wordlightly.
I was miserable because I hatebeing hot.
And so the flip side was that Iushered all those efforts into
movement.
So when I feel anxious andespecially again, as a highly,
sensitive person, as anintuitive empath, when I start
(33:04):
to feel that vibration inside, Imove.
I'm either walking in natureoutside or I'm getting in the
pool at that point in time.
That was, became the flip side.
So that's sort of how Inegotiated and was able to
balance it.
So did I put on a few pounds?
Yes.
But it wasn't getting to theother side.
It wasn't really going down thishorrible.
(33:25):
So like you mentioned, I couldkind of justify it.
And then as I met with anemotional eater, I began to
really work with my mindset andI worked on subconscious work
and I worked deeper tounderstand that it wasn't as
much about the pandemic as itwas the environment of where I
was, which goes back tochildhood, which was an
(33:47):
incredibly toxic and abusive andunsafe environment for me.
So it went so deep.
You know, much deeper than thesurface of, oh, the world might
end, than what you're thinking.
And through that, I alsoadopted, and learned this quote
and I share it with a lot of myclients.
And it's similar, but a littledifferent than, than your quote
(34:09):
with Martha is that fear isnothing more than excitement
without breath.
And so I really embody that.
And I'm like, okay, are youreally anxious?
Are you really excited aboutthis?
But you are nervous about theunknown.
And nine times out of 10, that'swhat it's about, right?
(34:30):
Like I am a panicked flyer.
I can't stand, I can't standflying, but I love flying and I
get such a good sleep on aplane.
Okay.
What an oxymoron that is.
Right?
So it's working through thosesides and being able to go
deeper within yourself.
To heal, to transform, to findthat empowerment.
(34:51):
And so that's what I've doneover this period of time.
And now, gosh, I think it'll be,I haven't even had a sip
alcohol, I think since last.
August last shot.
So almost going on here and Icould care less like neither
here nor there.
I do have a lot of substanceabuse and all sorts of stuff in
my families, but it's I so enjoylife and I'm to the flip side
(35:15):
where I do enjoy food where thatfirst half of my life I didn't.
Yeah.
Or I didn't allow myself.
That was the one thing that Icould control.
And so I'm finding that happymedium.
It's finding being in the flow.
Mm hmm.
You know, where is it okay?
And acknowledging that you'renot perfect and that some days
(35:37):
it just is what it is.
And then, you know, then you'regoing to take a step forward
that next day or that nextmoment or, you know, having
grace with yourself is the mostimportant thing for everyone
right now.
What I really love, well, first,like I'm hearing a couple of
different themes in your story,which thank you so much for
(36:00):
sharing.
And I'm, I'm so glad that Iasked because I think a lot of
people will resonate with whatyou shared and even see how like
my experience is a little bitdifferent than your experience
and both are valid and real andone is not better or worse.
I think it's important that wehave that perspective when we
(36:21):
look at our relationship withour health that everybody's
relationships are different andjust because we don't have these
quote unquote rock bottommoments where we, you know, did
10 bags of potato chips or awhole bottle of vodka or
something.
Like if it's not in alignmentwith you, then it's a problem.
(36:43):
Right.
That's like, that's thebeginning and the end of the
argument is like, if it's notsupporting you, then it's not
supporting you.
And that's a problem.
So, but I heard you talk aboutlike, the desire for control,
and then kind of like a, uh,superficial sense of control
(37:03):
through not eating or theneating or drinking.
Then I also heard the need forsafety, particularly in the
unknown, the element of familydynamics coming in, both present
and past.
So all of these, and then evenhow you interpret stimulation in
(37:25):
your body, particularlyemotional stimulation.
That's also a big part ofhealing.
Emotional eating is learning abetter way to manage what we're
feeling in our own bodies.
But also what I really love ishow you could see and you could
(37:45):
hear where you are in yourrelationship with yourself is
that there's.
such a deeper assistance andlike, I will help you through
this than where you were in thepast, where in the past it was
kind of like, I don't know howto help you through this.
We just have to get through it.
(38:05):
Where now it's like, okay, whenwe feel the energy, it means we
need to move.
And that's a really greatexample.
But like for myself, justbecause, you know, we're
different, everybody'sdifferent, I would also abuse
working out.
It was like, I would overeat andthen I would overexercise.
(38:28):
So I didn't really find mybalance with movement.
Until many, many years later on,because I was also kind of
trapped in this cycle of, I haveto work off whatever I just ate.
And that can be very true for alot of women who, are high
achievers, is that we will tendto push ourselves to exhaustion
(38:52):
as a way of like forcingourselves to slow down or turn
off because we don't know how topush the button ourselves.
So I just wanted to make thosehighlights and connections for
the people who are listeningthat Everybody's relationship
with food is different,everybody's coping mechanisms
are even different.
(39:14):
Don't allow yourself to waituntil things get worse before
they get better.
Because, like I said, if it's anissue, if it's causing issues in
your life, if you don't feelhappy and healthy and at peace
with yourself, it doesn't haveto stay that way.
And, like, you got help, I gothelp.
(39:34):
We are help for our clients andthings like that.
And like I said, like it doesn'thave to stay that way and it
doesn't have to get worse.
I agree.
I agree.
It was so beautiful.
Oh my gosh.
This has been so much fun.
I can't even, like, so much tosay.
We could be here for hours.
So I really want to ask you thisone question that I love to ask
(39:56):
guests on our show.
What is one thing that maybe noone knows about Jessica?
Hmm.
I don't know.
I don't know if there's like anydeep secrets.
Oh, it doesn't have to be a deepsecret.
(40:18):
I put a lot of things out intothe world, so I don't know.
I think I need some help, like,narrowing it down.
Can you give me like a Sure.
What is one thing that nobodyknows about the relationship
between you and your fur babies?
Oh my gosh.
So I can talk about my dogs allday every day.
(40:39):
So something that I do with mydogs, and it's actually, A
practice that I share with myclients and invite them to do,
but so in my work with myclients, we talk about self love
and self love being theacknowledgement and the
appreciation and gratitude foryourself, but I use the example
(41:04):
that we engage in love.
We engage in thatacknowledgement, appreciation,
gratitude.
For things and people in ourlives, we just don't really
realize we're doing it and I'lloften give the example of like,
when you look at your dogs, oryou look at your kids, or you
look at something, someone youlove, and you think like, oh,
(41:25):
look how cute they are, or youjust kind of relish in It's a
good thing.
Right.
their adorableness or theirbeauty or, you know, their
energy or whatever it may be.
And that self love is doing thatwith ourselves.
So one of the things that I dooftentimes in the morning is I
will just watch my dogs wake upbecause they just have their own
(41:51):
like morning routine of how theyget out of their own beds.
And Something that I'll do is Iwill, um, I will like lovingly
pet them and in my mind and inmy heart, I'm just sending like
loving energy to them and it'sreally interesting to see how
(42:11):
they receive it as a sensitiveand I believe my Animals are
also extremely sensitive aswell, but it's just really a
beautiful practice of sendingand receiving love, and, um, I
do it because I enjoy it, notbecause I have to, or I'm not
(42:33):
striving for anything, it's justactually for the sake of it.
Really nourishing and enjoyable.
And I know the impact of sendingpositive energy, especially to
animals and other beings.
So Like, that is something thatI do and I, I don't tell anyone
(42:55):
I do it until now.
Until now.
Everyone in the world.
Until everyone over 120countries.
No one knows what you do everymorning.
And I'm, I'm fully read and I amlike, I have, Full body blushing
right now.
I'm so warm and saying thisbecause it, it's such an
(43:17):
intimate practice I have withthem.
And, like I said, I don't, Idon't do it for anything.
I just do it because it feelsgood.
So absolutely.
Oh, I love that you share that.
Thank you.
Us for mamas have to sticktogether.
Yes.
Oh my gosh, this has been soamazing.
As we close out the show today,what is one last piece of
(43:41):
inspiration that you'd like toleave with us?
I would invite people to lookbeyond what they're doing with
food and start to get curious asto what is really going on
beneath the surface.
What are you feeling?
What are you really hungry for?
Because it's these deeperquestions that can unlock the
(44:05):
real doors that hold thetransformation that you're
looking for.
I would also say that there's anexcellent resource and quiz on
my website called the four rootsof emotional eating clarity
quiz.
So if you're looking to take adeeper look at your relationship
(44:26):
with food, find out what'sreally deeply at the core of
some of the food triggers, thatis an excellent resource.
And that comes with a beginner'sguide to start working with the
results that you get from thequiz.
So I would say those two thingsof like, look deeper.
Ask deeper questions.
(44:47):
What am I really hungry for?
What am I really feeling?
What am I seeking to escapefrom?
And then grab that resource onmy website because it's changing
soon because I'm gonna put upthe fear flesh as a resource so
you'll want to get that too.
Wonderful.
Well, that takes us into pleaseshare with us your website so
(45:10):
everyone can go and connect withyou.
That'sescapefromemotionaleating.
com, escapefromemotionaleating.
com.
Great, fabulous.
And of course, all of Jessica'sinformation will be over on the
show notes at jenniferpilates.
com.
So you can head over there, headto her website, grab her
newsletter.
So they grab the free resourcesnow.
(45:32):
So then you can also jump on thefear flush when that comes out
as well.
This has been so amazing, soeducational, and I feel so
empowering for so many peoplearound food, Being able to share
your story, my story, and justwhat we can do to help
ourselves.
as a world moving forward in ourrelationships in all areas,
(45:57):
body, mind, and spirit.
Thank you so much, Jessica.
Thank you for having me and keepdoing the work that you're
doing.
Thank you so much.
I appreciate that.
Well, as we say until next time,may you live an empowered life
from within.
(46:20):
Thank you so much for tuning into another episode.
Please remember to rate, review,and subscribe to Empowered
Within with Jennifer Pilates.
Your feedback is important.
It helps me to connect with youand gives me insight into who
you are and what you're enjoyingabout the show.
For today's show notes anddiscount codes from today's
sponsors, head over tojenniferpilates.
(46:40):
com.
Until next time, may you live anempowered life from within.
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