December 23, 2024 • 28 mins
In this special holiday episode, Justin Wenck shares the powerful Hawaiian clearing practice of Ho’oponopono to help you navigate the season’s stressors with ease and joy.
Whether you’re dealing with family drama, financial pressures, or just the chaos of holiday schedules, this simple technique can transform your mindset and bring balance to your life.
Learn how four simple phrases can clear negativity and help you focus on gratitude and love during the holidays. Plus, Justin guides you through a calming practice to kickstart your journey toward a peaceful and joyful holiday season.
Key Highlights:
- Why can the holidays be stressful, and how can Ho’oponopono help?
- The story of Dr. Hew Len and the transformative power of Ho’oponopono.
- The four clearing statements: "I’m sorry, I love you, I thank you, please forgive me."
- Practical ways to use Ho’oponopono during holiday challenges.
- A guided Ho’oponopono meditation for clearing and peace.
Overcome the daily grind with transformative techniques from Justin's book, 'Engineered to Love.'
These practices aren't just about finding peace—they're about reconnecting with yourself and the world around you in meaningful ways.
Access your free materials today at engineeredtolove.com/sample and start living a life filled with joy, ease, and love.
Watch the full video episode at Justin Wenck, Ph.D. YouTube Channel!
Check out my best-selling book "Engineered to Love: Going Beyond Success to Fulfillment" also available on Audiobook on all streaming platforms! Go to https://www.engineeredtolove.com/ to learn more!
Got a question or comment about the show? E-mail me at podcast@justinwenck.com.
Remember to subscribe so you don't miss the next episode! Connect with me:
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Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended, music and pics belong to the rightful owners.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
And so anytime something'sannoying you or bothering you,
(00:03):
rubbing you the wrong way, evenif you don't have to believe
like any of the other stuff,just compare it to what is
likely going to be going on inyour mental chatter, where
you're just going to be makingthe situation worse in your
head, creating more frustration,more annoyance, more sadness. If
you compare it at that verysimple level of what mental
chatter? Isn't it better to behaving mental chatter of being
(00:26):
apologetic, of forgiveness, oflove, of gratitude?
Are you ready to live a lifewith enough time, money and
energy have relationships andconnections that delight you?
Are you ready for theextraordinary life you know
you've been missing? If so, thenthis is the place for you. I'm a
(00:48):
best selling author, coach,consultant and speaker who's
worked in technology for overtwo decades. I'm a leader at
transforming people andorganizations from operating in
fear, obligation and guilt torunning off joy, ease and love.
It's time for engineeringemotions and energy with me.
Justin Wenck PhD,welcome to a special holiday
(01:13):
edition of the program gonna becovering holiday happiness made
simple.
So when Santa sack is maybefilled with soot instead of
those sultry, sensuous, I don'tknow, super good gifts that you
actually want gonna be teachingand going over a wonderful, easy
(01:38):
technique that's gonna just turnthat frown upside down and make
everything merry and fantasticand all those things from It's A
Wonderful Life, or at least notas grinchy, awful, you know,
more like the end of the Grinchthat soul Christmas, or be like
all of the movie Elf, whateveryour favorite holiday thing is.
(02:00):
So I'm going to be going over,you know, maybe some common
challenges that you often have.
Then I'm going to be talkingabout this technique that I've
covered before. It's actuallyone of the favorite, favorite
episodes that people continue tofind and download even a couple
of years later. So that's why Iwant to refresh it and bring it
back for this very, importanttime of year, which is, I think,
(02:21):
incredibly powerful. Can bejoyful, but let's face it, for
many people, there ends up beinglike way more stress, even if
there's time off of work,becomes more work, just with the
people that aren't trained howto deal with you in a way that
is professional or polite orsometimes even kind. So that's
what we're going to be goingover. And I'm going to end this
(02:43):
episode. So make sure you payclose attention to the whole
thing, because at the very end,I'm going to guide you through a
practice. So you're going to befeeling good and having some
good things going, and you'regoing to really know how to use
this in your life. So thetechnique is called HO O pono,
pono, and I'm going to talkabout the technique in just a
(03:03):
little bit, but because, whenthis is coming out, this is
actually a little bit of my giftto you, because otherwise I
would have been scheduling apodcast to drop on New Year's
Eve, but instead, this is goingto be coming Christmas Eve. So
it's coming one week early. SoI'm, I'm Santa, who's, you know,
Johnny on the spot that's gothis sack filled with all the
(03:24):
goodies ready to spray it allover the good boys and girls,
which you are, you've been adelightfully good listener. And
because of that, I'm going tobring this to you. And you know,
as always, if you could, like,subscribe, rate, review, all
that stuff that really puts alittle jolly into Old Saint
Justin stocking, if you knowwhat I mean. Boy, I'm a bit of a
(03:47):
blowhard here with some of thethe terminology and saying a bit
too much. But hey, you know,it's Christmas, you know,
sometimes you just, you just,you just have too much. You're
just bursting out. And you just,you just spread it all over, and
you just can't help yourself.
And so I'm I'm here, and I'mspreading, and hopefully you'll
be spreading whatever it is youwant to spread very soon. So
(04:09):
again, you don't have thestability maybe of work. So now
they, there's, there's kidsinvolved, maybe they're not even
your kids, and then there's inlaws or other family members.
And then you could be in asituation similar to me, is
maybe you don't even have anyonethat you have to do. And so it's
like, what do you do? Who do youspend time with yourself, with
friends, or do you go travelsomewhere? So there's all these
(04:31):
decisions, or all theseobligations, and then when you
are with people, there's theworries of, you know, are you
going to say the right thing orthe wrong thing? Or maybe
you're, you're you're good.
You've been listening to thisshow. You know how to
communicate with people, butlet's face it, some people, they
still got PTSD from theelection, you know, or maybe
they're gloating because theelection, whatever it is, you
don't want to talk politics, butthese people that you're
(04:55):
spending time with, they can'thelp themselves, or they can't
help themselves because.
They are a literal child, andthey're vomiting actual vomit or
other stuff. There's all thesethings going on. I can be
stressful, and it can make youwell, just want to, just want to
shake, shake the baby. Butyou're not supposed to shake the
baby or other people, oranybody. Just shake presents.
(05:16):
You want to shake the presents,but not too hard, because there
could be something delicate inthere, like a puppy. Oh, did you
didn't do that? Did you whereyou shook the puppy? And then
the puppy is, I was, I don'twant to have a Christmas like
that ever again, and I don'twant you either. So, and then
there's the financial stress,right? Think of all the the
money that gets spent, you know,whether you're traveling or just
(05:39):
buying gifts, or the meals andall these things. So money could
be a pressure, right? And thenthere's the disparity between
who has how much and not enough,and how much do you spend and
how much do you receive? Are yougetting good gifts for people
can just be so stressless timeof year. And then what you're
getting ready for the next yearand thinking about maybe new
year's resolutions, there's justa lot, a lot of stressors. Other
(06:02):
people are stressed, and sothey're going to be acting out.
And so maybe the traffic peoplea little bit more rude in
traffic, maybe the people are alittle bit rude or short, you
know, when you're on the phoneor through text message, or
that's the other thing. Textmessaging, there's so many ways
to interpret somebody sendssomething, and it's just like,
you know, it's just like, areyou okay? Recent episode that we
(06:23):
just put out on YouTube aboutasking, are you okay? And
depending on what state you'rein, you might be like, what they
think there's something wrongwith me. You think there's
something wrong with me? I'llshow it. I'll show them who's
got something wrong with I'mgonna fuck fucking show this
person what's what. But really,that's not how that was
intended. It was just like, hey,everything okay, I love you,
buddy. You know, if it said itthat way, you've been like, Oh,
(06:45):
all right, buddy, I'm doing goodbuddy. How you doing? Buddy?
Buddy, Buddy. You can't tell itover text. And so this technique
that I'm going to talk about andguide you through Ho oponopono,
or Ho Ho oppo pono, Ponofestivid up with a little little
Santa humor. So what is Hooponopono? It's an ancient
(07:06):
Hawaiian clearing technique, andit really became popularized by
this, this doctor, Dr Hu Len.
And basically the story that I,that I've heard, is he used to
work at a it was an institutionin Hawaii on one of the islands,
or the the criminally,criminally insane. Maybe, I
think maybe I'm confusingBatman's Arkham Asylum, but, but
(07:26):
a place where people are, theyhave a mental health challenges,
and they've done somethingcriminal. And when he got there,
it was rough, like it was justlike staff could, could not
hang, hang at this place, theywould quit. You know, the people
that are incarcerated there, or,you know, involuntarily kept
there, they can't leave. But,you know, nobody gets better.
(07:50):
And the people that are workingthere, they're, they're just
feeling worse. And it's just, itwas just a shit, a shit show,
just the worst, the worst thatyou know this would be the
Grinches most delight, right?
Just like, oh yeah, all theunhappiness, all the misery,
yeah. Like, oh, beginning ofGrinch Who Stole Christmas. This
(08:10):
would have been the idealWhoville. This wasn't Whoville.
This was Hawaii. It's supposedto be paradise. And so Dr Hulin
shows up the people that ranthis right there wits end. And
he's just like, hey, you let merun this the way I want to run
this. They go, all right, fine.
What do you what? How do youwant to run this? He's like, I
am going to go sit in an officeand I'm going to review case
files and do pono, pono, andthat'll be all. That's all I'm
(08:34):
going to do. And it's, it'sgoing to it's going to be great.
And this might sound like acomedy bet from who was that?
Who's that? Comedian BobNewhart. There's a great video
of him doing a skit where he's ahe's a therapist. It's $5 for a
session. I don't make change,and I don't give refunds, and
you pay in advance. And some ofyou might have seen this, maybe
(08:57):
I'll find a way to get thisposted or but you can look at,
but it's, you know, the womanwho came in and wanted the
session with therapist new heartpays the $5
and she She explains that herissues, she's she's worried
about being buried alive, intowhich he just replies, stop it.
Stop it. And that's all he does.
Is he just, he'll stop it toher. But the whole pono, pono is
(09:20):
a lot kind. They're a lot gentleand actually a lot more
effective, but they're like,there's no way this is going to
work. But yeah, he didn't seepatients other than just going
to his offices, from his office.
He didn't really talk orinteract to anyone. But
strangely, over the course of afew weeks, things just started
getting better at this facility,like there were less less
(09:41):
violent interactions amongpatients and with the staff.
Became more enjoyable for thestaff to get there. There
started being progress for thethe inmates, the patients as
well, like they would be gettingbetter valuations and things
like that. And this is just allbecause he was doing opponent.
Pono by reviewing the casefiles, you know, like, open a
(10:03):
case file, like, you know,patient,
you know, came from highlyabusive background and then
violently did this and that andthe other thing. And, you know,
just all this horrible and hewould just do the whole pono,
pono practice this, the clearingstatements. And want to be
getting to what those are herejust a little bit, and it's so
powerful yet so simple, thateventually they ended up having
(10:25):
to close this facility downbecause
the people that you know werethere, there was no longer a
medical reason to keep themthere anymore. That's how
powerful and successful Drhewlen's use of the whole pono
pone technique was in the story,and he's since gone to, you
know, teach this, popularizethis, and there's, you know,
(10:49):
many other people. So, you know,I'm not, not the only one who
knows about this, and I don't, Idon't want to be the only one. I
want everybody to have thistool, because it's a clearing
statement. And so basically, thetheory is, is that when there's
something that shows up in ourlife that causes discomfort
challenge, that means there'skind of like something,
something stuck, something thatwe've been holding on to, just
(11:11):
something that we've broughtalong. Because there's also this
concept of being 100%responsible for our lives, and
HO upon a pono kind of requiresthat being radically responsible
for your life, that everythingthat comes into your life,
everything that comes into mylife, I'm responsible for my
experience, your response, foryour experience. I've talked
(11:32):
about this on the show many,many times, just just I
experienced something, whetherit's I'm reading a story, or
something happens to me. I'mresponsible. It's something,
something about me has broughtit in. And, you know, we've
talked about some of the shows,how that can possibly true. You
don't necessarily have tobelieve that or not yet. If you
do, it's going to make it alittle bit easier. But if not,
(11:52):
you can still use thistechnique, and it's still going
to do amazing, incredible thingsfor you. And then, so it's
basically taking responsibilitylike, Oh, I'm coming across, you
know, this violent person, thissadistic whatever, like, oh,
there's something, somethinginside of me that needs
clearing, that needs to let goof that, let it go, just go out
and let it be cleansed. Kind oflike, you know, when you do your
(12:15):
have your washing machine, ifyou don't put something in the
washing machine, it's going tobe sticky and gross and nasty,
but if you let it go in thewashing machine, the washing
machine will do what it does,and you get back something very
beautiful, cleanly enjoyable,right? This is kind of how pono
pono works, is you're just kindof saying like, Okay, this is
(12:36):
something that apparently Ididn't know is here some
something needs a little bitcleansing, so let's let it go,
let it go into the universalwashing machine, and then
usually what comes back is goingto be much more joyful, happy
and great. And you want happierholiday time, right? So this is
a great time because there'sgoing to be so much stuff coming
(12:57):
up that you have thisopportunity to use this clearing
statement to let that go intothe universal washing machine,
and then what's going to comeback is going to be amazing,
fun, joyful, happier feelingsand things like that. And so it
really is. It's these foursimple statements, and as far as
I know, the order doesn'tmatter. So the order I usually
(13:18):
say them in is, I'm sorry, Ilove you. I thank you. Please
forgive me. Nowthese are kind of being just
said to that universal washingmachine, like, if somebody's
pissing you off, you don't haveto be saying this to that other
person, because you might like,I'm what the they're the one
that fucking voted that way.
(13:40):
They're the asshole. I'm the I'mthe one that's right. Like, Why
should I apologize to them?
You're not apologizing to them.
You're not asking them for and Iwould, I would say, don't you
don't say this out loud. This isin your mental chatter, which
means you can be saying thisanytime, all the time. I'm
sorry. I love you. I thank you.
Please forgive me. So it's soit's so it's basically, you're
(14:00):
kind of, like saying this,because it's like, Oh, I'm
sorry. I didn't realize that Ikind of had, you know,
something, something at issuewith what's happening in my
experience right now. I didn'trealize I had an issue with
somebody, you know, withdifferent politics or different
religion. I didn't realize thatI had, I had a pain in my
shoulder, I now have theawareness. So it's kind of
(14:22):
saying, like, I'm sorry. I loveyou. Thank you. You know I love
you. You're amazing, globalwashing machine, spirit, you
know, whatever is beyond me. Ilove you for bringing this to my
attention.
Thank you. Thank you again fornow. Now this can be done. You
(14:44):
know, it's like, if you had, ifI spilled some of my shirt,
someone comes and goes like,Hey, you got some you got some
mustering. Haha, funny. Did thefinger up the nose thing.
But you're ultimately thankfulthat somebody pointed something
out that was, you know.
Not not working for you, youknow, unclean or just not what
you desired, and now you havethe opportunity to do something
(15:06):
about it, like, that's fuckingcool. That's cool. So whatever
you want to call it, thatbrought that to your attention.
You're just acknowledging that.
And then, hey, forgive me fornot noticing sooner, you know,
and it's a little bit whateverthis is, this power, but it's
also it could be you, thehighest, most sage, like part of
you asking for forgiveness fromthat part of you too. So there's
a lot of ways you can kind ofview this, but really all that
(15:27):
matters is that you say the fourstatements, I'm sorry, I love
you. I thank you. Please forgiveme. And so anytime something's
annoying you or bothering you,rubbing you the wrong way, I'm
sorry. I love you. I thank you.
Please forgive me. And what'sreally, really cool is you could
(15:49):
do this, and even if you don'thave to believe like any of the
other stuff, just compare it towhat is likely going to be going
on in your mental chatter, whereyou're just going to be making
the situation worse in yourhead, creating more frustration,
more annoyance, more sadness,more just more that, right? So
(16:10):
just if you compare it at thatvery simple level of what mental
chatter, isn't it better to behaving mental chatter of being
apologetic, being in aforgiveness, of love, of
gratitude. So it really, it's,it's hitting a whole lot of
things, that it's just going tobe bringing you up in your
mental chatter. And this mentalchatter is going to be bringing
(16:31):
up your emotional feelings aswell. And if you're feeling
better and you're having morepositive thoughts, then around
you, people are also gonna,like, pick up on that and be a
little bit more happier to bearound you and enjoying being
around you. And they're probablygonna behave a little bit more
happy, fun, joyful way. So youkind of starting to get how this
(16:52):
can work really, really easilyand really, really well. And if
there's some extra ancientHawaiian magic that happens on
top of that, like, Great,fantastic, Free Magic, right?
I'm a big fan of, if there'ssomething extra, bring it to me.
Bring on the extra good stuff,right? Like, you know, you had a
(17:12):
restaurant and it was a greatmeal, and then the waiter just
goes, like, we just want to dowe're just so happy to have you
in. Here's, here's a freedessert. You're just like, fuck
yeah, this is fantastic. That'sthat's what this can be like,
there can be free dessert. Like,even the base, even just the
appetizer, is going to be sodelicious, so amazing, so
wonderful.
(17:33):
And it can just get even better.
So I encourage you to try it.
I'm going to lead you through apractice here. It's just going
to last five minutes, and that'sgoing to be at the very, very,
very end of the show. And I'malso going to make sure that
that ends up being its ownseparate, standalone thing, so
that, if you don't want allthis, but you just want to want
(17:53):
me guiding you through Hooponopono, it's great because
it's just something you just puton. You can say it along with
me, so you get a fewrepetitions, because, you know,
it's one of these, like, maybeyou're gonna, maybe you're gonna
forget one of the words, buttrust me, it's so good. I, you
know, I do this for when I'mdriving in the car, or when I'm,
you know, sitting Hearing PeopleSay something dumb or something
(18:13):
annoying. I also do this whenI'm, like, like, My body hurts.
I'm foam rolling. Or if I doyoga, I've even taught Ho
oponopono yoga. It's great forJustin that I would say that
there's like discomfort that'syou're acknowledging, you're
acknowledging it, you'rerecognizing it, you're taking
responsibility, and then you'resaying these four statements,
(18:33):
I'm sorry. I love you, I thankyou. Please forgive me. To clear
out whatever, whatever createdit, whatever caused it to allow
something new to kind of comeinto place.
Is it? Is it magic? Magic likeinstant, not always, sometimes
it is, sometimes it is notalways. Yet, I will tell you
(18:55):
that if you practice thisconsistently over time, you will
absolutely start to notice yourlife getting happier and more
joyful. And so if you startpracticing this today, by the
time you get to if you'rewatching this, listen to this
when it comes out. And rightbefore Christmas, you do this
till New Year, your your newyear is already going to be off
(19:16):
to a much better start. Butwhenever you're watching or
listening to this, if you do it,and you do it for at least 21
days as often as you canremember, it's going to be
awesome. So I'd love to hear howthis has worked for you, or what
you would want this to work on.
Because Tell me, tell me in thecomments, send an email right at
the end of the show. Be ways tolet you know, how to how to let
(19:37):
me know. But if you tell me,know. Justin, I can't wait to
use Ho oponopono when I'm withUncle so and so. Or I've got a,
you know, look at my credit cardstatement come January 19, or
whenever your your holidayshopping credit card comes bill,
whatever it is, let me know,because that's going to help you
to actually do it. And then, youknow, also, let me know. How,
(19:57):
how would you.
Is when you do it, so that we'regoing to end the show, and then
after the show is going to bethe practice, the guided
practice. So thank you so much.
Let me know how you're going tobe using this, what you'd like
to use it on, and how thingshave been. And wishing you a
very, very happy new year. It'sbeen a great 2024
(20:22):
there's been a lot of challengesin my life, yet also even more
joys, and I'm so happy to havehad the opportunity to share
them with you on the show. AndI was thirsty, so I just had
that little drink of of LaCroix, which,
(20:45):
if they would like to sponsor,I'm I'm very open to that. I'd
love to thank Christine, whoedits, produces this podcast.
It's made my life so mucheasier. She does the social
media for all this. So all theclips, the highlights, the
posts, all that, all goes thanksto Christine. So if you've been
(21:05):
loving how this is produced andget gotten out there, let
Christine know. Say, Christine,thanks so much for putting out a
great quality show. Anything youdon't like about the show, so
that's my fault. Let me know,and I'll do better. I'll do if
it makes sense, you might have abad idea and might be nonsense,
then I'm just gonna do thankyou. I love you. I'm sorry.
Please forgive me in my head,because I do hope on a pono as
(21:30):
often as I as I remember. Sowith that, thank you, and stick
around for the the practicecoming up and good day. Thanks
for tuning in to engineeringemotions and energy with Justin
Wenck PhD. Today's episoderesonated with you. Please
subscribe and leave a five starreview. Your feedback not only
supports the show, but alsohelps others find us and start
(21:52):
their journey of emotional andenergetic mastery. You can also
help by sharing this podcastwith someone you think will love
it just as much as you dotogether, we're engineering more
amazing lives.
I'm sorry.
(22:14):
I love you.
I thank you.
Please forgive me.
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(22:35):
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(22:55):
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(23:16):
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(23:37):
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(23:59):
I'm sorry, I love you,I thank you, please forgive me.
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(24:21):
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(24:42):
I love you, I thank you,please forgive me.
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You, I thank you,please forgive me.
(25:06):
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(25:26):
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(25:46):
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(26:08):
Please forgive me, I'm sorry.
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(26:30):
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(26:52):
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me. I.
And so anytime something'sannoying you or bothering you,
(00:03):
rubbing you the wrong way, evenif you don't have to believe
like any of the other stuff,just compare it to what is
likely going to be going on inyour mental chatter, where
you're just going to be makingthe situation worse in your
head, creating more frustration,more annoyance, more sadness. If
you compare it at that verysimple level of what mental
chatter? Isn't it better to behaving mental chatter of being
(00:26):
apologetic, of forgiveness, oflove, of gratitude?
Are you ready to live a lifewith enough time, money and
energy have relationships andconnections that delight you?
Are you ready for theextraordinary life you know
you've been missing? If so, thenthis is the place for you. I'm a
(00:48):
best selling author, coach,consultant and speaker who's
worked in technology for overtwo decades. I'm a leader at
transforming people andorganizations from operating in
fear, obligation and guilt torunning off joy, ease and love.
It's time for engineeringemotions and energy with me.
Justin Wenck PhD,welcome to a special holiday
(01:13):
edition of the program gonna becovering holiday happiness made
simple.
So when Santa sack is maybefilled with soot instead of
those sultry, sensuous, I don'tknow, super good gifts that you
actually want gonna be teachingand going over a wonderful, easy
(01:38):
technique that's gonna just turnthat frown upside down and make
everything merry and fantasticand all those things from It's A
Wonderful Life, or at least notas grinchy, awful, you know,
more like the end of the Grinchthat soul Christmas, or be like
all of the movie Elf, whateveryour favorite holiday thing is.
(02:00):
So I'm going to be going over,you know, maybe some common
challenges that you often have.
Then I'm going to be talkingabout this technique that I've
covered before. It's actuallyone of the favorite, favorite
episodes that people continue tofind and download even a couple
of years later. So that's why Iwant to refresh it and bring it
back for this very, importanttime of year, which is, I think,
(02:21):
incredibly powerful. Can bejoyful, but let's face it, for
many people, there ends up beinglike way more stress, even if
there's time off of work,becomes more work, just with the
people that aren't trained howto deal with you in a way that
is professional or polite orsometimes even kind. So that's
what we're going to be goingover. And I'm going to end this
(02:43):
episode. So make sure you payclose attention to the whole
thing, because at the very end,I'm going to guide you through a
practice. So you're going to befeeling good and having some
good things going, and you'regoing to really know how to use
this in your life. So thetechnique is called HO O pono,
pono, and I'm going to talkabout the technique in just a
(03:03):
little bit, but because, whenthis is coming out, this is
actually a little bit of my giftto you, because otherwise I
would have been scheduling apodcast to drop on New Year's
Eve, but instead, this is goingto be coming Christmas Eve. So
it's coming one week early. SoI'm, I'm Santa, who's, you know,
Johnny on the spot that's gothis sack filled with all the
(03:24):
goodies ready to spray it allover the good boys and girls,
which you are, you've been adelightfully good listener. And
because of that, I'm going tobring this to you. And you know,
as always, if you could, like,subscribe, rate, review, all
that stuff that really puts alittle jolly into Old Saint
Justin stocking, if you knowwhat I mean. Boy, I'm a bit of a
(03:47):
blowhard here with some of thethe terminology and saying a bit
too much. But hey, you know,it's Christmas, you know,
sometimes you just, you just,you just have too much. You're
just bursting out. And you just,you just spread it all over, and
you just can't help yourself.
And so I'm I'm here, and I'mspreading, and hopefully you'll
be spreading whatever it is youwant to spread very soon. So
(04:09):
again, you don't have thestability maybe of work. So now
they, there's, there's kidsinvolved, maybe they're not even
your kids, and then there's inlaws or other family members.
And then you could be in asituation similar to me, is
maybe you don't even have anyonethat you have to do. And so it's
like, what do you do? Who do youspend time with yourself, with
friends, or do you go travelsomewhere? So there's all these
(04:31):
decisions, or all theseobligations, and then when you
are with people, there's theworries of, you know, are you
going to say the right thing orthe wrong thing? Or maybe
you're, you're you're good.
You've been listening to thisshow. You know how to
communicate with people, butlet's face it, some people, they
still got PTSD from theelection, you know, or maybe
they're gloating because theelection, whatever it is, you
don't want to talk politics, butthese people that you're
(04:55):
spending time with, they can'thelp themselves, or they can't
help themselves because.
They are a literal child, andthey're vomiting actual vomit or
other stuff. There's all thesethings going on. I can be
stressful, and it can make youwell, just want to, just want to
shake, shake the baby. Butyou're not supposed to shake the
baby or other people, oranybody. Just shake presents.
(05:16):
You want to shake the presents,but not too hard, because there
could be something delicate inthere, like a puppy. Oh, did you
didn't do that? Did you whereyou shook the puppy? And then
the puppy is, I was, I don'twant to have a Christmas like
that ever again, and I don'twant you either. So, and then
there's the financial stress,right? Think of all the the
money that gets spent, you know,whether you're traveling or just
(05:39):
buying gifts, or the meals andall these things. So money could
be a pressure, right? And thenthere's the disparity between
who has how much and not enough,and how much do you spend and
how much do you receive? Are yougetting good gifts for people
can just be so stressless timeof year. And then what you're
getting ready for the next yearand thinking about maybe new
year's resolutions, there's justa lot, a lot of stressors. Other
(06:02):
people are stressed, and sothey're going to be acting out.
And so maybe the traffic peoplea little bit more rude in
traffic, maybe the people are alittle bit rude or short, you
know, when you're on the phoneor through text message, or
that's the other thing. Textmessaging, there's so many ways
to interpret somebody sendssomething, and it's just like,
you know, it's just like, areyou okay? Recent episode that we
(06:23):
just put out on YouTube aboutasking, are you okay? And
depending on what state you'rein, you might be like, what they
think there's something wrongwith me. You think there's
something wrong with me? I'llshow it. I'll show them who's
got something wrong with I'mgonna fuck fucking show this
person what's what. But really,that's not how that was
intended. It was just like, hey,everything okay, I love you,
buddy. You know, if it said itthat way, you've been like, Oh,
(06:45):
all right, buddy, I'm doing goodbuddy. How you doing? Buddy?
Buddy, Buddy. You can't tell itover text. And so this technique
that I'm going to talk about andguide you through Ho oponopono,
or Ho Ho oppo pono, Ponofestivid up with a little little
Santa humor. So what is Hooponopono? It's an ancient
(07:06):
Hawaiian clearing technique, andit really became popularized by
this, this doctor, Dr Hu Len.
And basically the story that I,that I've heard, is he used to
work at a it was an institutionin Hawaii on one of the islands,
or the the criminally,criminally insane. Maybe, I
think maybe I'm confusingBatman's Arkham Asylum, but, but
(07:26):
a place where people are, theyhave a mental health challenges,
and they've done somethingcriminal. And when he got there,
it was rough, like it was justlike staff could, could not
hang, hang at this place, theywould quit. You know, the people
that are incarcerated there, or,you know, involuntarily kept
there, they can't leave. But,you know, nobody gets better.
(07:50):
And the people that are workingthere, they're, they're just
feeling worse. And it's just, itwas just a shit, a shit show,
just the worst, the worst thatyou know this would be the
Grinches most delight, right?
Just like, oh yeah, all theunhappiness, all the misery,
yeah. Like, oh, beginning ofGrinch Who Stole Christmas. This
(08:10):
would have been the idealWhoville. This wasn't Whoville.
This was Hawaii. It's supposedto be paradise. And so Dr Hulin
shows up the people that ranthis right there wits end. And
he's just like, hey, you let merun this the way I want to run
this. They go, all right, fine.
What do you what? How do youwant to run this? He's like, I
am going to go sit in an officeand I'm going to review case
files and do pono, pono, andthat'll be all. That's all I'm
(08:34):
going to do. And it's, it'sgoing to it's going to be great.
And this might sound like acomedy bet from who was that?
Who's that? Comedian BobNewhart. There's a great video
of him doing a skit where he's ahe's a therapist. It's $5 for a
session. I don't make change,and I don't give refunds, and
you pay in advance. And some ofyou might have seen this, maybe
(08:57):
I'll find a way to get thisposted or but you can look at,
but it's, you know, the womanwho came in and wanted the
session with therapist new heartpays the $5
and she She explains that herissues, she's she's worried
about being buried alive, intowhich he just replies, stop it.
Stop it. And that's all he does.
Is he just, he'll stop it toher. But the whole pono, pono is
(09:20):
a lot kind. They're a lot gentleand actually a lot more
effective, but they're like,there's no way this is going to
work. But yeah, he didn't seepatients other than just going
to his offices, from his office.
He didn't really talk orinteract to anyone. But
strangely, over the course of afew weeks, things just started
getting better at this facility,like there were less less
(09:41):
violent interactions amongpatients and with the staff.
Became more enjoyable for thestaff to get there. There
started being progress for thethe inmates, the patients as
well, like they would be gettingbetter valuations and things
like that. And this is just allbecause he was doing opponent.
Pono by reviewing the casefiles, you know, like, open a
(10:03):
case file, like, you know,patient,
you know, came from highlyabusive background and then
violently did this and that andthe other thing. And, you know,
just all this horrible and hewould just do the whole pono,
pono practice this, the clearingstatements. And want to be
getting to what those are herejust a little bit, and it's so
powerful yet so simple, thateventually they ended up having
(10:25):
to close this facility downbecause
the people that you know werethere, there was no longer a
medical reason to keep themthere anymore. That's how
powerful and successful Drhewlen's use of the whole pono
pone technique was in the story,and he's since gone to, you
know, teach this, popularizethis, and there's, you know,
(10:49):
many other people. So, you know,I'm not, not the only one who
knows about this, and I don't, Idon't want to be the only one. I
want everybody to have thistool, because it's a clearing
statement. And so basically, thetheory is, is that when there's
something that shows up in ourlife that causes discomfort
challenge, that means there'skind of like something,
something stuck, something thatwe've been holding on to, just
(11:11):
something that we've broughtalong. Because there's also this
concept of being 100%responsible for our lives, and
HO upon a pono kind of requiresthat being radically responsible
for your life, that everythingthat comes into your life,
everything that comes into mylife, I'm responsible for my
experience, your response, foryour experience. I've talked
(11:32):
about this on the show many,many times, just just I
experienced something, whetherit's I'm reading a story, or
something happens to me. I'mresponsible. It's something,
something about me has broughtit in. And, you know, we've
talked about some of the shows,how that can possibly true. You
don't necessarily have tobelieve that or not yet. If you
do, it's going to make it alittle bit easier. But if not,
(11:52):
you can still use thistechnique, and it's still going
to do amazing, incredible thingsfor you. And then, so it's
basically taking responsibilitylike, Oh, I'm coming across, you
know, this violent person, thissadistic whatever, like, oh,
there's something, somethinginside of me that needs
clearing, that needs to let goof that, let it go, just go out
and let it be cleansed. Kind oflike, you know, when you do your
(12:15):
have your washing machine, ifyou don't put something in the
washing machine, it's going tobe sticky and gross and nasty,
but if you let it go in thewashing machine, the washing
machine will do what it does,and you get back something very
beautiful, cleanly enjoyable,right? This is kind of how pono
pono works, is you're just kindof saying like, Okay, this is
(12:36):
something that apparently Ididn't know is here some
something needs a little bitcleansing, so let's let it go,
let it go into the universalwashing machine, and then
usually what comes back is goingto be much more joyful, happy
and great. And you want happierholiday time, right? So this is
a great time because there'sgoing to be so much stuff coming
(12:57):
up that you have thisopportunity to use this clearing
statement to let that go intothe universal washing machine,
and then what's going to comeback is going to be amazing,
fun, joyful, happier feelingsand things like that. And so it
really is. It's these foursimple statements, and as far as
I know, the order doesn'tmatter. So the order I usually
(13:18):
say them in is, I'm sorry, Ilove you. I thank you. Please
forgive me. Nowthese are kind of being just
said to that universal washingmachine, like, if somebody's
pissing you off, you don't haveto be saying this to that other
person, because you might like,I'm what the they're the one
that fucking voted that way.
(13:40):
They're the asshole. I'm the I'mthe one that's right. Like, Why
should I apologize to them?
You're not apologizing to them.
You're not asking them for and Iwould, I would say, don't you
don't say this out loud. This isin your mental chatter, which
means you can be saying thisanytime, all the time. I'm
sorry. I love you. I thank you.
Please forgive me. So it's soit's so it's basically, you're
(14:00):
kind of, like saying this,because it's like, Oh, I'm
sorry. I didn't realize that Ikind of had, you know,
something, something at issuewith what's happening in my
experience right now. I didn'trealize I had an issue with
somebody, you know, withdifferent politics or different
religion. I didn't realize thatI had, I had a pain in my
shoulder, I now have theawareness. So it's kind of
(14:22):
saying, like, I'm sorry. I loveyou. Thank you. You know I love
you. You're amazing, globalwashing machine, spirit, you
know, whatever is beyond me. Ilove you for bringing this to my
attention.
Thank you. Thank you again fornow. Now this can be done. You
(14:44):
know, it's like, if you had, ifI spilled some of my shirt,
someone comes and goes like,Hey, you got some you got some
mustering. Haha, funny. Did thefinger up the nose thing.
But you're ultimately thankfulthat somebody pointed something
out that was, you know.
Not not working for you, youknow, unclean or just not what
you desired, and now you havethe opportunity to do something
(15:06):
about it, like, that's fuckingcool. That's cool. So whatever
you want to call it, thatbrought that to your attention.
You're just acknowledging that.
And then, hey, forgive me fornot noticing sooner, you know,
and it's a little bit whateverthis is, this power, but it's
also it could be you, thehighest, most sage, like part of
you asking for forgiveness fromthat part of you too. So there's
a lot of ways you can kind ofview this, but really all that
(15:27):
matters is that you say the fourstatements, I'm sorry, I love
you. I thank you. Please forgiveme. And so anytime something's
annoying you or bothering you,rubbing you the wrong way, I'm
sorry. I love you. I thank you.
Please forgive me. And what'sreally, really cool is you could
(15:49):
do this, and even if you don'thave to believe like any of the
other stuff, just compare it towhat is likely going to be going
on in your mental chatter, whereyou're just going to be making
the situation worse in yourhead, creating more frustration,
more annoyance, more sadness,more just more that, right? So
(16:10):
just if you compare it at thatvery simple level of what mental
chatter, isn't it better to behaving mental chatter of being
apologetic, being in aforgiveness, of love, of
gratitude. So it really, it's,it's hitting a whole lot of
things, that it's just going tobe bringing you up in your
mental chatter. And this mentalchatter is going to be bringing
(16:31):
up your emotional feelings aswell. And if you're feeling
better and you're having morepositive thoughts, then around
you, people are also gonna,like, pick up on that and be a
little bit more happier to bearound you and enjoying being
around you. And they're probablygonna behave a little bit more
happy, fun, joyful way. So youkind of starting to get how this
(16:52):
can work really, really easilyand really, really well. And if
there's some extra ancientHawaiian magic that happens on
top of that, like, Great,fantastic, Free Magic, right?
I'm a big fan of, if there'ssomething extra, bring it to me.
Bring on the extra good stuff,right? Like, you know, you had a
(17:12):
restaurant and it was a greatmeal, and then the waiter just
goes, like, we just want to dowe're just so happy to have you
in. Here's, here's a freedessert. You're just like, fuck
yeah, this is fantastic. That'sthat's what this can be like,
there can be free dessert. Like,even the base, even just the
appetizer, is going to be sodelicious, so amazing, so
wonderful.
(17:33):
And it can just get even better.
So I encourage you to try it.
I'm going to lead you through apractice here. It's just going
to last five minutes, and that'sgoing to be at the very, very,
very end of the show. And I'malso going to make sure that
that ends up being its ownseparate, standalone thing, so
that, if you don't want allthis, but you just want to want
(17:53):
me guiding you through Hooponopono, it's great because
it's just something you just puton. You can say it along with
me, so you get a fewrepetitions, because, you know,
it's one of these, like, maybeyou're gonna, maybe you're gonna
forget one of the words, buttrust me, it's so good. I, you
know, I do this for when I'mdriving in the car, or when I'm,
you know, sitting Hearing PeopleSay something dumb or something
(18:13):
annoying. I also do this whenI'm, like, like, My body hurts.
I'm foam rolling. Or if I doyoga, I've even taught Ho
oponopono yoga. It's great forJustin that I would say that
there's like discomfort that'syou're acknowledging, you're
acknowledging it, you'rerecognizing it, you're taking
responsibility, and then you'resaying these four statements,
(18:33):
I'm sorry. I love you, I thankyou. Please forgive me. To clear
out whatever, whatever createdit, whatever caused it to allow
something new to kind of comeinto place.
Is it? Is it magic? Magic likeinstant, not always, sometimes
it is, sometimes it is notalways. Yet, I will tell you
(18:55):
that if you practice thisconsistently over time, you will
absolutely start to notice yourlife getting happier and more
joyful. And so if you startpracticing this today, by the
time you get to if you'rewatching this, listen to this
when it comes out. And rightbefore Christmas, you do this
till New Year, your your newyear is already going to be off
(19:16):
to a much better start. Butwhenever you're watching or
listening to this, if you do it,and you do it for at least 21
days as often as you canremember, it's going to be
awesome. So I'd love to hear howthis has worked for you, or what
you would want this to work on.
Because Tell me, tell me in thecomments, send an email right at
the end of the show. Be ways tolet you know, how to how to let
(19:37):
me know. But if you tell me,know. Justin, I can't wait to
use Ho oponopono when I'm withUncle so and so. Or I've got a,
you know, look at my credit cardstatement come January 19, or
whenever your your holidayshopping credit card comes bill,
whatever it is, let me know,because that's going to help you
to actually do it. And then, youknow, also, let me know. How,
(19:57):
how would you.
Is when you do it, so that we'regoing to end the show, and then
after the show is going to bethe practice, the guided
practice. So thank you so much.
Let me know how you're going tobe using this, what you'd like
to use it on, and how thingshave been. And wishing you a
very, very happy new year. It'sbeen a great 2024
(20:22):
there's been a lot of challengesin my life, yet also even more
joys, and I'm so happy to havehad the opportunity to share
them with you on the show. AndI was thirsty, so I just had
that little drink of of LaCroix, which,
(20:45):
if they would like to sponsor,I'm I'm very open to that. I'd
love to thank Christine, whoedits, produces this podcast.
It's made my life so mucheasier. She does the social
media for all this. So all theclips, the highlights, the
posts, all that, all goes thanksto Christine. So if you've been
(21:05):
loving how this is produced andget gotten out there, let
Christine know. Say, Christine,thanks so much for putting out a
great quality show. Anything youdon't like about the show, so
that's my fault. Let me know,and I'll do better. I'll do if
it makes sense, you might have abad idea and might be nonsense,
then I'm just gonna do thankyou. I love you. I'm sorry.
Please forgive me in my head,because I do hope on a pono as
(21:30):
often as I as I remember. Sowith that, thank you, and stick
around for the the practicecoming up and good day. Thanks
for tuning in to engineeringemotions and energy with Justin
Wenck PhD. Today's episoderesonated with you. Please
subscribe and leave a five starreview. Your feedback not only
supports the show, but alsohelps others find us and start
(21:52):
their journey of emotional andenergetic mastery. You can also
help by sharing this podcastwith someone you think will love
it just as much as you dotogether, we're engineering more
amazing lives.
I'm sorry.
(22:14):
I love you.
I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
(22:35):
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you,please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
(22:55):
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
(23:16):
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you,please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
(23:37):
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you,I thank you. Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
(23:59):
I'm sorry, I love you,I thank you, please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
(24:21):
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry, I love you,I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
(24:42):
I love you, I thank you,please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love.
You, I thank you,please forgive me.
(25:06):
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry, I love you,I thank you.
Please forgive me, I'm sorry.
I love you,I thank you. Please forgive me,
(25:26):
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me, I'm sorry,I love you, I thank you,
please forgive me.
(25:46):
I'm sorry.
I love you,I thank you. Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me, I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
(26:08):
Please forgive me, I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry, I love you,I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
(26:30):
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you,please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
(26:52):
Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.
I love you, I thank you.
Please forgive me. I.
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