January 21, 2025 • 19 mins
Are you frustrated by setbacks or feeling like you’ve lost progress on your goals?
In this episode, Justin explores the concept of backsliding and reveals why it’s not only normal but also essential for growth. Drawing inspiration from Michelangelo’s artistic process and personal anecdotes, Justin unpacks how to view challenges as opportunities for refinement, rather than failures.
You’ll learn how to reframe setbacks, why life is more art than engineering, and how to leverage your “backslide” moments to build a better, more fulfilling future.
Key Highlights:
- Understanding Backsliding: Why it’s a natural part of growth and how to reframe it.
- Life as Art, Not Engineering: Insights from Michelangelo’s sculpting process.
- Personal Examples: How Justin navigated setbacks in health and work to find clarity.
- The Role of Support Systems: Why you need the right people to help you on your journey.
- Practical Advice: How to embrace the process of refinement and growth, even during setbacks.
Watch the full video episode at Justin Wenck, Ph.D. YouTube Channel!
Check out my best-selling book "Engineered to Love: Going Beyond Success to Fulfillment" also available on Audiobook on all streaming platforms! Go to https://www.engineeredtolove.com/ to learn more!
Got a question or comment about the show? E-mail me at podcast@justinwenck.com.
Remember to subscribe so you don't miss the next episode! Connect with me:
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Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended, music and pics belong to the rightful owners.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
It's in our nature, because wewe exhale and we inhale. There's
(00:04):
no inhale, no expansion, withoutthe exhale, the compression. And
so it's really it's learningfrom that compression, that
going backwards, because itreally is an opportunity for us
to re evaluate. Is where I'mgoing, where I really want to
go?
Are you ready to live a lifewith enough time, money and
(00:25):
energy have relationships andconnections that delight you?
Are you ready for theextraordinary life you know
you've been missing? If so, thenthis is the place for you. I'm a
best selling author, coach,consultant and speaker who's
worked in technology for overtwo decades, I'm a leader at
transforming people andorganizations from operating in
(00:48):
fear, obligation and guilt torunning off joy, ease and love.
It's time for engineeringemotions and energy with me.
Justin Wenck PhDtoday, going to be talking about
backsliding. What isbacksliding? That is where,
basically, you've been makingprogress. You've been getting
(01:10):
better in some area of yourlife, and, you know, you're
going to the gym more often, oryou're, you know, reading like
instead of watching TV, oryou're starting to, you know, go
out there to try to meet newpeople, whether it's friends or
romantic relationship, or it'syou're working on improving your
health, whatever it is. Andthen, boom, you kind of like, go
(01:32):
backwards. Feels like you gobackwards. You're doing even
worse than before. So that isbacksliding. And so maybe, you
know, you've been working onyour New Year's resolutions,
because this is coming out, youknow, early in the year, but a
little later, and this is thetime where most people would
have given up, because only 8%of people, I guess, are actually
successful. 92% fail at theirNew Year's resolutions or just
(01:55):
about anything that most peopleset their mind to. So with that,
you know, don't feel too badyou're in good company, but you
don't want to be in goodcompany. You want to be in great
company, phenomenal company,which is why you're here with
me. And backsliding is totallypart of the process of expanding
and growing. And even though I'mthe author of engineered to
(02:20):
love, go and be on success tofulfillment, our life is not
meant to be lived like anengineering project that the
engineering has already beendone. You are the result of an
engineering project, yet ourlife is meant to be more like a
work of art. And so I'lleventually share a couple of
Michelangelo quotes with you.
(02:41):
But there's, you know, one quotethat he has. It's, the sculpture
is already complete within themarble block before I start my
work, it is already there. Ijust have to chisel away the
superfluous material. And beforewe get to like, you know, what?
What can that mean when it comesto your life? Because you might
be like, I don't want to be asculptor. I don't want to do
(03:02):
that, you know, just just torefresh you. Maybe it's been a
while since you've seen theTeenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,
but remember Leonardo leads.
Donatello does machines. Raphaelis cool, but crude, and
Michelangelo is the party dude.
So you know, this is, this is aguy that knows how to enjoy
life, and I want to enjoy life,and I want you to be able to
(03:24):
enjoy life. So that's why we aregoing to be taking guidance from
Michelangelo here, who is thethe funnest turtle, who wielded
the the number, the num chucks.
Numb Chucks,no, but we're all talking about
the Renaissance artistMichelangelo, who sculpted many
things out of marble, I think hedid David, and he also did an
(03:46):
angel. Going back to this quoteof this sculpture is complete
within the block, just he has togo and chisel away the
superfluous material. Nowimagine if Michelangelo was only
allowed to do one pass over themarble, like, only go one
direction, like, from the frontto the back and never come back
(04:07):
ever again. What do you thinkthat that art? How well would he
be able to get rid of thissuperfluous material? I mean,
I'm sure he'd be able to comewith some cool stuff under that
restriction, but probably wouldbe nowhere near as amazing as
what he created by painstakinglyover hours and hours and hours
going back and forth over placesand getting off, you know,
(04:31):
bigger chunks and then smallerchunks to eventually reveal, you
know, the the beauty of thesework of arts and our Life is the
same way, and that's really whatthe backsliding is, is it's an
opportunity. It's very common inpersonal growth. It's very going
to be very rare to find anybodythat you know goes and grows
without going back. Becausereally it's in our nature,
(04:54):
because we, you know, we weexhale and we inhale.
Now there's no inhale, noexpansion, without the exhale,
the the the compression. And soit's really, it's, you know,
learning from that, thatcompression, that that going
backwards, because it really isan opportunity for us to re
(05:15):
about, reevaluate is where I'mgoing, where I really want to
go. Because the reason this isthe topic is because I've also
been going through somebacksliding in some in some
ways. One has been my health.
Like the last two months of 2024I made some really great
improvements in my the area ofmy health, but completely
changing my diet and starting toget a little bit more exercise.
(05:38):
Yet, like, January 2, I got,like, a really bad cold, and
then got better, and then lastweek, it got even worse, like
this has been the, you know,it's, you know, one of the worst
cold type things I've had, youknow, probably, probably for a
few years. And it's really,really frustrating, because it's
(05:58):
like, but I'm but I'm eatingbetter, and I've got all these
better habits, and yet still.
But it's also like, oh, I wasn'tperfect with my with my eating
and things like that. I wasn'tperfect. And so it brought up,
well, what does it mean to me tonot be to not be perfect,
which is something that I've,you know, been through before,
(06:18):
yet, this was another layer,another, you know, another layer
down, closer to the morerefinement, attunement, things
like that. And then also alittle bit, like, with my, my
work. Because big, big focuslast year became working with,
with founders, with startupfounders of tech companies. And
there's, there's a little bit oflike, oh yeah. Like, I really
(06:40):
had some, like, big plans at theend of the year where I was
like, I'm gonna do this podcastseries. I'm gonna do that. And
it was just like, Oh, I'm not,I'm not making any progress on
that. I don't have themotivation. And what turned out
was i It gave me some time toreflect of like, Ooh, there's
some refinement. I don't justwant to be working with any
(07:02):
founders of any types ofcompanies. I want to be working
with founders who are actuallymaking, already making an
impact, and just want to domore, not ones that are just
fucking around. Was was talkingto my therapist today, and that
use the analogy of i i want tobe I want to be working with
people that already have aflying plane that is able to
(07:23):
sustain some flight. They just,they just want to go higher,
faster, farther than everbefore, as opposed to, maybe
you've seen it, or maybe you'venot. But Red Bull has this
competition. I don't know howoften they do it, where they do
it, but it's basically likepeople create flying machines,
quote, unquote, flying machines,and they they run them, I guess
they have to be human powered,and they run them off a ramp
(07:46):
into the ocean. And it'sbasically just a question of how
far they make it until theycrash. They are not going to,
they are not actually going tosustain flight and be able to
land on dry stuff. It's just,how far will they go until they
crash? And it's like, oh, I'mdone working with the floppers.
You know, I love them. They gottheir place and that they're
(08:06):
going through their thing. Andjust, I've had my time working
with the floppers, and I'm readyto work with the flyers. And so
sometimes a backslide is a greatwhat way a great opportunity to
reflect and then decide really,either recommit to your why or
refine your why, or decide, oh,there's something else that I'd
(08:26):
rather be doing. And it's reallyimportant to use this as a
chance to not beat yourself upso that can sometimes you the
biggest practice is to not judgeyourself, to go like, I'm awful.
I suck. I never do this. Dothings well, but to really have
that compassion, to kind oflike, be the adult of your
child, like self, and just kindof like, recognize we're always
(08:50):
a work in progress, no matterour age, no matter our
background, no matter how farwe've come. Chances are we're
doing something we haven'treally done before. Otherwise,
why the fuck are you doing it?
If you're just doing what you'vedone before, you're probably
bored out of your mind. And thensome people, some people can
just keep doing the same thingover and over. Those are not
listeners of my show. I'm youknow, if you're listening just
because you've done before.
(09:12):
Thank you so much. Do appreciateremember to like, subscribe and
all that stuff. But it'sprobably not hitting you on the
level of most of my listenersthat are really wanting to do
new things, have impact, createin the world, be able to feel
joy in their life, connect,relate, things like that. And so
it's and also it's a goodopportunity to see how well your
(09:34):
support system is as well. And Ireally got to see how well my
support system was, becausebasically, last couple days,
every everyone that I work with,I've now worked with, and I've
gotten so many revelations onthe things that I could change
shiftlook at differently, and it's
like I wouldn't have been ableto do that all by myself without
(09:55):
my my support team, a therapist.
Coach and various other peoplethat I have that helped me out.
And so it's, it's a great timeto reach out to them. And if you
don't have don't have them, thenmaybe this is the sign of, like,
hey, it's time, it's time to geta support team. Because there's
a, there's there's a quote, Ithink it's an old saying, which
(10:19):
people's it comes from but it'slike, if you want to go if you
want to go fast, go alone, ifyou want to go far, go with
others, something like that. Soyes, you can move really
quickly,but you might not actually make
it very far, because there's awhole lot of reasons. Like, you
know, you might go fast, butthen you're going to run out of
run out of energy, run out ofsteam. Might go fast, but you
(10:39):
might just smack into a wall.
You might be going in circles.
Yet when you go with others,there's there's people there
that are going to have otherthings to help decide, like,
what is the best direction togo? What's the best way to go?
Like, if you need to rest, thenmaybe they're there to support
you. So it's a great opportunityto look into like, what is your
(10:59):
support team? And then, youknow, to evaluate, like, those,
those practices. And because alot of times, you know, when
we're going to do something new,like a new exercise program is
usually, usually really good, wealways go like, Ah, I'm going to
go three times a week. And wekind of have this idealized
optimistic, or optimistic, yetwhen we actually try to go
(11:21):
through it, we're faced withreality, what can happen, right?
So it's like, oh my gosh, I'mreally tired, right? Oh my gosh,
I'm hungry. Oh, there wastraffic, oh, it was busy, all of
all of these things that youdidn't know until you started
doing it. And so you're gonnalearn those things. And then
(11:45):
that's it might mean you don'tdo your workouts. You don't do
the workouts right. And so thenyou're not gonna feel good. And
so then maybe it's like, I don'tfeel good. How do I feel good?
Like, Oh, let me go sit on thecouch and watch TV and eat a
Domino's Pizza and get thebrownie marble thing, and then
let me get the dough bites withthe the garlic dipping sauce,
and let me just eat all that inone sitting while I watch, while
(12:07):
I watch a scary movie that'sgoing to freak me out and really
make me like all crazy and anduptight and fearful and on edge
and just have a hard timesleeping. And then it's like,
even harder the next day to go,go do the workout, or whatever
that could be. Who knows, Idon't know, just throwing
something off the top of myhead. And so once you've gone
(12:28):
through that, now you can have amore mature plan of how you're
actually going to go about whatit is, or it's like, okay, I got
to make sure I got my shoesready. I got to leave. I know I
need to leave this much time to,you know, get it in. I've got to
block off the calendar. Or maybeI need to, like, modulate
because, like, oh, wait, I got,like, really sore. And so it's
(12:50):
like, okay, so maybe I need todo fewer days a week of this,
but now I need to add in, maybeI got to go get a massage, or I
need to foam roll before, and soit's like, you get a better
plan. So there ends up being allthese great things. And again,
if we're seeing life as an ex asan artful expression that is
about the creative process, andthere is no, there really is no
(13:14):
done. Because I think it'ssometimes funny when I go, you
know, go travel, and it's like,you go and get, you know they'll
have little tchotchkes,souvenirs, things like that. I
was trying to see if I haveanything as an example nearby,
for those of you watching. Butoh, actually, it's in my other
my other room. Because I likesquirrels, because they're
(13:37):
they're just adorable and fullof energy, and I respect that.
And they got big, nuts, but so,yeah, I got, I got two, you
know, different sizes. Andyou'll see this sometimes where
it's like, there'll be multiplesizes at different price points,
and it's almost like computergraphics were sort of like, the
cheapest thing will look like,it's only got, like, eight bit,
(13:57):
eight bit graphics. And then thesomething that's a little bit
pricier is like, oh, that 16bit. And then, you know, the
most expensive thing will be,you know, full 32 bit, you know,
it'll, it'll actually look likethe fucking thing. And so it's
life is kind of like that, ifyou only, if you only want to
have just the most basic, like,where it's like, I guess that
kind of looks like a life. Then,yeah, you don't have to
(14:21):
backslide, but you're alsoprobably not going to be
growing. You're not going to begetting that nuance. But if you
want the fullest life, thebiggest expression that with the
the most the most details, themost intricacies, the most
possibilities, all the curvesand the expression and the
texture and the light and thecolor and the sounds, and all of
the things, a lot of goingforward, but then also a lot of
(14:43):
back to bring about the the lifethat's been worth that's worth
living. And so I'm going to endthis with a couple more
Michelangelo quotes, dude,what'd you do with the pizza?
No, that's that's not wrong.
Michelangelo.
When asked about, and, you know,he's, he, there's an angel that
he sculpted. And I think this isgreat, because it's like, and in
(15:05):
fact, we are, we are the angelbeing sculpted, and we are, we
are the sculpture. And thesculptor, yes, he said, I saw
the angel in the marble andcarved until I set him free. You
know, it's, it's just not, it'snot linear. Creating art is not
linear, and so so is our life.
So this expectation that it's ato b, it's total bullshit, and
you're gonna see you've beeninundated with this, you know,
(15:30):
but in TV and in movies, youknow, and on social media, where
it's just like you do, you signup for the program, and 12 weeks
later, you're though you're thefucking god, you know. And you
watch the movie, and it's, it'sgot the montage. It's like, oh,
there's a little bit ofchallenge, but oh, now Rocky's
gonna be able to win the fightor not. I haven't seen Rocky, or
(15:54):
all of them, in a long time, butit's life's not. Life's not like
that. Life's not like that atall. It's you can move forward
and you go back a little bit,and it's almost more important
how you go back, what's yourattitude? Are you learning?
Because if you go back and youjust use that as like well, I
guess, I guess I didn't get it,and you give up, then you're
(16:18):
just gonna get what you get. Butif you are able to see that it's
part of the process, that, yes,you are, in fact, growing, and
you can continue going, that youreally only fail when you when
you give up, then that's gonnacreate an artful life worth
living, and you are worth that.
(16:39):
I'm worth that. We're all worth,that we are worth creating an
amazing, amazing life togetheras well. And Michelangelo also
had another quote, and he said,I am still learning. And he was
considered a master. So if amaster of art can say, I'm still
learning, then even you, yes,you dear listener, dear viewer,
(17:02):
you can also still be learningno matter how far you've come,
because you still seek even MOREAnd for even more. That means
there is more to learn. And ifwe get stuck on the how we
learn, then we're never going tobe able to learn what we need to
learn, to experience what it iswe desire. So let go of how
you're going to learn it. Youare going to learn it. The key
(17:25):
is to just set the direction andgo, and to monitor, be aware of
what's happening, and to adjust.
Because I live, I live near theocean. I like to sail. I like
doing water sports. And thething is, there's currents,
there's winds. If you set yourdirection and you just, and you
just, you know, go chill out.
(17:46):
You are going to hit some rocksor you are going to capsize. You
are not going to make it towhere you want to go. But yet,
if you are in it, you arepresent, you are with the
current circumstances, and youare adjusting, then it is the
ride of a lifetime. Is a ride ofa lifetime. So let your life be
(18:06):
art. Let your life be thatvoyage, that journey on the sea.
And I'd love to hear you knowmaybe if you're, you've, you've
back, slid or had somechallenges, share it. Let me
know. Let me know. And maybe Ican offer some perspective on
how you and how you moveforward. I'm really good at that
shit, really, really, really,really good at that. So, yeah,
(18:27):
so I do wish you well. It's oneof those like, I wish you, I
wish you ease joy in makingforward progress. But I also
wish you ease and joy on yourbackslide, because you are
making some amazing art, myfriend, and it's glad to be here
with you. And with that, thankyou and good day. Thanks for
(18:47):
tuning in to engineeringemotions and energy with Justin
Wenck PhD. Today's episoderesonated with you. Please
subscribe and leave a five starreview. Your feedback not only
supports the show, but alsohelps others find us and start
their journey of emotional andenergetic mastery. You can also
help by sharing this podcastwith someone you think will love
it just as much as you dotogether, we're engineering more
(19:09):
amazing lives you.
It's in our nature, because wewe exhale and we inhale. There's
(00:04):
no inhale, no expansion, withoutthe exhale, the compression. And
so it's really it's learningfrom that compression, that
going backwards, because itreally is an opportunity for us
to re evaluate. Is where I'mgoing, where I really want to
go?
Are you ready to live a lifewith enough time, money and
(00:25):
energy have relationships andconnections that delight you?
Are you ready for theextraordinary life you know
you've been missing? If so, thenthis is the place for you. I'm a
best selling author, coach,consultant and speaker who's
worked in technology for overtwo decades, I'm a leader at
transforming people andorganizations from operating in
(00:48):
fear, obligation and guilt torunning off joy, ease and love.
It's time for engineeringemotions and energy with me.
Justin Wenck PhDtoday, going to be talking about
backsliding. What isbacksliding? That is where,
basically, you've been makingprogress. You've been getting
(01:10):
better in some area of yourlife, and, you know, you're
going to the gym more often, oryou're, you know, reading like
instead of watching TV, oryou're starting to, you know, go
out there to try to meet newpeople, whether it's friends or
romantic relationship, or it'syou're working on improving your
health, whatever it is. Andthen, boom, you kind of like, go
(01:32):
backwards. Feels like you gobackwards. You're doing even
worse than before. So that isbacksliding. And so maybe, you
know, you've been working onyour New Year's resolutions,
because this is coming out, youknow, early in the year, but a
little later, and this is thetime where most people would
have given up, because only 8%of people, I guess, are actually
successful. 92% fail at theirNew Year's resolutions or just
(01:55):
about anything that most peopleset their mind to. So with that,
you know, don't feel too badyou're in good company, but you
don't want to be in goodcompany. You want to be in great
company, phenomenal company,which is why you're here with
me. And backsliding is totallypart of the process of expanding
and growing. And even though I'mthe author of engineered to
(02:20):
love, go and be on success tofulfillment, our life is not
meant to be lived like anengineering project that the
engineering has already beendone. You are the result of an
engineering project, yet ourlife is meant to be more like a
work of art. And so I'lleventually share a couple of
Michelangelo quotes with you.
(02:41):
But there's, you know, one quotethat he has. It's, the sculpture
is already complete within themarble block before I start my
work, it is already there. Ijust have to chisel away the
superfluous material. And beforewe get to like, you know, what?
What can that mean when it comesto your life? Because you might
be like, I don't want to be asculptor. I don't want to do
(03:02):
that, you know, just just torefresh you. Maybe it's been a
while since you've seen theTeenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,
but remember Leonardo leads.
Donatello does machines. Raphaelis cool, but crude, and
Michelangelo is the party dude.
So you know, this is, this is aguy that knows how to enjoy
life, and I want to enjoy life,and I want you to be able to
(03:24):
enjoy life. So that's why we aregoing to be taking guidance from
Michelangelo here, who is thethe funnest turtle, who wielded
the the number, the num chucks.
Numb Chucks,no, but we're all talking about
the Renaissance artistMichelangelo, who sculpted many
things out of marble, I think hedid David, and he also did an
(03:46):
angel. Going back to this quoteof this sculpture is complete
within the block, just he has togo and chisel away the
superfluous material. Nowimagine if Michelangelo was only
allowed to do one pass over themarble, like, only go one
direction, like, from the frontto the back and never come back
(04:07):
ever again. What do you thinkthat that art? How well would he
be able to get rid of thissuperfluous material? I mean,
I'm sure he'd be able to comewith some cool stuff under that
restriction, but probably wouldbe nowhere near as amazing as
what he created by painstakinglyover hours and hours and hours
going back and forth over placesand getting off, you know,
(04:31):
bigger chunks and then smallerchunks to eventually reveal, you
know, the the beauty of thesework of arts and our Life is the
same way, and that's really whatthe backsliding is, is it's an
opportunity. It's very common inpersonal growth. It's very going
to be very rare to find anybodythat you know goes and grows
without going back. Becausereally it's in our nature,
(04:54):
because we, you know, we weexhale and we inhale.
Now there's no inhale, noexpansion, without the exhale,
the the the compression. And soit's really, it's, you know,
learning from that, thatcompression, that that going
backwards, because it really isan opportunity for us to re
(05:15):
about, reevaluate is where I'mgoing, where I really want to
go. Because the reason this isthe topic is because I've also
been going through somebacksliding in some in some
ways. One has been my health.
Like the last two months of 2024I made some really great
improvements in my the area ofmy health, but completely
changing my diet and starting toget a little bit more exercise.
(05:38):
Yet, like, January 2, I got,like, a really bad cold, and
then got better, and then lastweek, it got even worse, like
this has been the, you know,it's, you know, one of the worst
cold type things I've had, youknow, probably, probably for a
few years. And it's really,really frustrating, because it's
(05:58):
like, but I'm but I'm eatingbetter, and I've got all these
better habits, and yet still.
But it's also like, oh, I wasn'tperfect with my with my eating
and things like that. I wasn'tperfect. And so it brought up,
well, what does it mean to me tonot be to not be perfect,
which is something that I've,you know, been through before,
(06:18):
yet, this was another layer,another, you know, another layer
down, closer to the morerefinement, attunement, things
like that. And then also alittle bit, like, with my, my
work. Because big, big focuslast year became working with,
with founders, with startupfounders of tech companies. And
there's, there's a little bit oflike, oh yeah. Like, I really
(06:40):
had some, like, big plans at theend of the year where I was
like, I'm gonna do this podcastseries. I'm gonna do that. And
it was just like, Oh, I'm not,I'm not making any progress on
that. I don't have themotivation. And what turned out
was i It gave me some time toreflect of like, Ooh, there's
some refinement. I don't justwant to be working with any
(07:02):
founders of any types ofcompanies. I want to be working
with founders who are actuallymaking, already making an
impact, and just want to domore, not ones that are just
fucking around. Was was talkingto my therapist today, and that
use the analogy of i i want tobe I want to be working with
people that already have aflying plane that is able to
(07:23):
sustain some flight. They just,they just want to go higher,
faster, farther than everbefore, as opposed to, maybe
you've seen it, or maybe you'venot. But Red Bull has this
competition. I don't know howoften they do it, where they do
it, but it's basically likepeople create flying machines,
quote, unquote, flying machines,and they they run them, I guess
they have to be human powered,and they run them off a ramp
(07:46):
into the ocean. And it'sbasically just a question of how
far they make it until theycrash. They are not going to,
they are not actually going tosustain flight and be able to
land on dry stuff. It's just,how far will they go until they
crash? And it's like, oh, I'mdone working with the floppers.
You know, I love them. They gottheir place and that they're
(08:06):
going through their thing. Andjust, I've had my time working
with the floppers, and I'm readyto work with the flyers. And so
sometimes a backslide is a greatwhat way a great opportunity to
reflect and then decide really,either recommit to your why or
refine your why, or decide, oh,there's something else that I'd
(08:26):
rather be doing. And it's reallyimportant to use this as a
chance to not beat yourself upso that can sometimes you the
biggest practice is to not judgeyourself, to go like, I'm awful.
I suck. I never do this. Dothings well, but to really have
that compassion, to kind oflike, be the adult of your
child, like self, and just kindof like, recognize we're always
(08:50):
a work in progress, no matterour age, no matter our
background, no matter how farwe've come. Chances are we're
doing something we haven'treally done before. Otherwise,
why the fuck are you doing it?
If you're just doing what you'vedone before, you're probably
bored out of your mind. And thensome people, some people can
just keep doing the same thingover and over. Those are not
listeners of my show. I'm youknow, if you're listening just
because you've done before.
(09:12):
Thank you so much. Do appreciateremember to like, subscribe and
all that stuff. But it'sprobably not hitting you on the
level of most of my listenersthat are really wanting to do
new things, have impact, createin the world, be able to feel
joy in their life, connect,relate, things like that. And so
it's and also it's a goodopportunity to see how well your
(09:34):
support system is as well. And Ireally got to see how well my
support system was, becausebasically, last couple days,
every everyone that I work with,I've now worked with, and I've
gotten so many revelations onthe things that I could change
shiftlook at differently, and it's
like I wouldn't have been ableto do that all by myself without
(09:55):
my my support team, a therapist.
Coach and various other peoplethat I have that helped me out.
And so it's, it's a great timeto reach out to them. And if you
don't have don't have them, thenmaybe this is the sign of, like,
hey, it's time, it's time to geta support team. Because there's
a, there's there's a quote, Ithink it's an old saying, which
(10:19):
people's it comes from but it'slike, if you want to go if you
want to go fast, go alone, ifyou want to go far, go with
others, something like that. Soyes, you can move really
quickly,but you might not actually make
it very far, because there's awhole lot of reasons. Like, you
know, you might go fast, butthen you're going to run out of
run out of energy, run out ofsteam. Might go fast, but you
(10:39):
might just smack into a wall.
You might be going in circles.
Yet when you go with others,there's there's people there
that are going to have otherthings to help decide, like,
what is the best direction togo? What's the best way to go?
Like, if you need to rest, thenmaybe they're there to support
you. So it's a great opportunityto look into like, what is your
(10:59):
support team? And then, youknow, to evaluate, like, those,
those practices. And because alot of times, you know, when
we're going to do something new,like a new exercise program is
usually, usually really good, wealways go like, Ah, I'm going to
go three times a week. And wekind of have this idealized
optimistic, or optimistic, yetwhen we actually try to go
(11:21):
through it, we're faced withreality, what can happen, right?
So it's like, oh my gosh, I'mreally tired, right? Oh my gosh,
I'm hungry. Oh, there wastraffic, oh, it was busy, all of
all of these things that youdidn't know until you started
doing it. And so you're gonnalearn those things. And then
(11:45):
that's it might mean you don'tdo your workouts. You don't do
the workouts right. And so thenyou're not gonna feel good. And
so then maybe it's like, I don'tfeel good. How do I feel good?
Like, Oh, let me go sit on thecouch and watch TV and eat a
Domino's Pizza and get thebrownie marble thing, and then
let me get the dough bites withthe the garlic dipping sauce,
and let me just eat all that inone sitting while I watch, while
(12:07):
I watch a scary movie that'sgoing to freak me out and really
make me like all crazy and anduptight and fearful and on edge
and just have a hard timesleeping. And then it's like,
even harder the next day to go,go do the workout, or whatever
that could be. Who knows, Idon't know, just throwing
something off the top of myhead. And so once you've gone
(12:28):
through that, now you can have amore mature plan of how you're
actually going to go about whatit is, or it's like, okay, I got
to make sure I got my shoesready. I got to leave. I know I
need to leave this much time to,you know, get it in. I've got to
block off the calendar. Or maybeI need to, like, modulate
because, like, oh, wait, I got,like, really sore. And so it's
(12:50):
like, okay, so maybe I need todo fewer days a week of this,
but now I need to add in, maybeI got to go get a massage, or I
need to foam roll before, and soit's like, you get a better
plan. So there ends up being allthese great things. And again,
if we're seeing life as an ex asan artful expression that is
about the creative process, andthere is no, there really is no
(13:14):
done. Because I think it'ssometimes funny when I go, you
know, go travel, and it's like,you go and get, you know they'll
have little tchotchkes,souvenirs, things like that. I
was trying to see if I haveanything as an example nearby,
for those of you watching. Butoh, actually, it's in my other
my other room. Because I likesquirrels, because they're
(13:37):
they're just adorable and fullof energy, and I respect that.
And they got big, nuts, but so,yeah, I got, I got two, you
know, different sizes. Andyou'll see this sometimes where
it's like, there'll be multiplesizes at different price points,
and it's almost like computergraphics were sort of like, the
cheapest thing will look like,it's only got, like, eight bit,
(13:57):
eight bit graphics. And then thesomething that's a little bit
pricier is like, oh, that 16bit. And then, you know, the
most expensive thing will be,you know, full 32 bit, you know,
it'll, it'll actually look likethe fucking thing. And so it's
life is kind of like that, ifyou only, if you only want to
have just the most basic, like,where it's like, I guess that
kind of looks like a life. Then,yeah, you don't have to
(14:21):
backslide, but you're alsoprobably not going to be
growing. You're not going to begetting that nuance. But if you
want the fullest life, thebiggest expression that with the
the most the most details, themost intricacies, the most
possibilities, all the curvesand the expression and the
texture and the light and thecolor and the sounds, and all of
the things, a lot of goingforward, but then also a lot of
(14:43):
back to bring about the the lifethat's been worth that's worth
living. And so I'm going to endthis with a couple more
Michelangelo quotes, dude,what'd you do with the pizza?
No, that's that's not wrong.
Michelangelo.
When asked about, and, you know,he's, he, there's an angel that
he sculpted. And I think this isgreat, because it's like, and in
(15:05):
fact, we are, we are the angelbeing sculpted, and we are, we
are the sculpture. And thesculptor, yes, he said, I saw
the angel in the marble andcarved until I set him free. You
know, it's, it's just not, it'snot linear. Creating art is not
linear, and so so is our life.
So this expectation that it's ato b, it's total bullshit, and
you're gonna see you've beeninundated with this, you know,
(15:30):
but in TV and in movies, youknow, and on social media, where
it's just like you do, you signup for the program, and 12 weeks
later, you're though you're thefucking god, you know. And you
watch the movie, and it's, it'sgot the montage. It's like, oh,
there's a little bit ofchallenge, but oh, now Rocky's
gonna be able to win the fightor not. I haven't seen Rocky, or
(15:54):
all of them, in a long time, butit's life's not. Life's not like
that. Life's not like that atall. It's you can move forward
and you go back a little bit,and it's almost more important
how you go back, what's yourattitude? Are you learning?
Because if you go back and youjust use that as like well, I
guess, I guess I didn't get it,and you give up, then you're
(16:18):
just gonna get what you get. Butif you are able to see that it's
part of the process, that, yes,you are, in fact, growing, and
you can continue going, that youreally only fail when you when
you give up, then that's gonnacreate an artful life worth
living, and you are worth that.
(16:39):
I'm worth that. We're all worth,that we are worth creating an
amazing, amazing life togetheras well. And Michelangelo also
had another quote, and he said,I am still learning. And he was
considered a master. So if amaster of art can say, I'm still
learning, then even you, yes,you dear listener, dear viewer,
(17:02):
you can also still be learningno matter how far you've come,
because you still seek even MOREAnd for even more. That means
there is more to learn. And ifwe get stuck on the how we
learn, then we're never going tobe able to learn what we need to
learn, to experience what it iswe desire. So let go of how
you're going to learn it. Youare going to learn it. The key
(17:25):
is to just set the direction andgo, and to monitor, be aware of
what's happening, and to adjust.
Because I live, I live near theocean. I like to sail. I like
doing water sports. And thething is, there's currents,
there's winds. If you set yourdirection and you just, and you
just, you know, go chill out.
(17:46):
You are going to hit some rocksor you are going to capsize. You
are not going to make it towhere you want to go. But yet,
if you are in it, you arepresent, you are with the
current circumstances, and youare adjusting, then it is the
ride of a lifetime. Is a ride ofa lifetime. So let your life be
(18:06):
art. Let your life be thatvoyage, that journey on the sea.
And I'd love to hear you knowmaybe if you're, you've, you've
back, slid or had somechallenges, share it. Let me
know. Let me know. And maybe Ican offer some perspective on
how you and how you moveforward. I'm really good at that
shit, really, really, really,really good at that. So, yeah,
(18:27):
so I do wish you well. It's oneof those like, I wish you, I
wish you ease joy in makingforward progress. But I also
wish you ease and joy on yourbackslide, because you are
making some amazing art, myfriend, and it's glad to be here
with you. And with that, thankyou and good day. Thanks for
(18:47):
tuning in to engineeringemotions and energy with Justin
Wenck PhD. Today's episoderesonated with you. Please
subscribe and leave a five starreview. Your feedback not only
supports the show, but alsohelps others find us and start
their journey of emotional andenergetic mastery. You can also
help by sharing this podcastwith someone you think will love
it just as much as you dotogether, we're engineering more
(19:09):
amazing lives you.
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