Enneagram Five

Fives grow up believing self-reliance is safety, but what happens when that belief turns into a voice that's constantly whispering you’re better off alone?

In this episode, we go deep into the tension between independence and connection, the pain of carrying unmet childhood needs into adulthood, and what happens when life forces you to confront the stories you’ve been living inside without even knowing it. Josiah opens up about...

Has anyone ever told you that you’re not really a Five?

In this episode, Cody stages an intervention (armed with four years of transcripts, Enneagram books, and a surprising analysis from ChatGPT) to settle an ongoing debate: Is Josiah actually a Five… or a Three in disguise?

What starts as a lighthearted experiment turns into one of the most personal and revealing conversations we’ve ever had about identity, burnout, belonging, and ...

Fives are proud of being “smart.” But what if that thing we trust most is also the thing holding us back?

In this episode, we talk about the difference between intellect and intelligence, and why Fives tend to obsess over one while ignoring the other. We get into why being analytical can make you feel powerful but also isolated, emotionally numb, disconnected from your body, and limited in real life. We also share how we’ve been bui...

Hard work is a virtue… until it becomes a trap.

In this episode, we explore how Fives relate to hard work, motivation, and the stories we’ve inherited about what effort should look like. We unpack our personal histories (lazy labels, blue-collar expectations, engineering hacks, and chronic fatigue) and how all of that shaped our relationship to discipline and purpose.

We also dive deep into the myth of "working smarter not harde...

Fives crave clarity, but expectations make everything fuzzy.

In this episode, we wrestle with how expectations shape our creative process, our friendships, and our self‑story—often without us noticing. We start with the behind‑the‑scenes saga of trying (for the third time!) to record this conversation, then follow the thread into dread before hitting “record,” unspoken agreements in friendship, and how TV taught many of us what rela...

In this live episode, we dig into a common belief about Fives that seems flattering on the surface but gets more complicated the deeper you go. We talk about what listening actually looks like for us, why presence is harder than it seems, and how emotional bandwidth plays into the equation.

We also share what’s been lighting up our curiosity lately (spoiler: it includes alien documentaries, tornado footage, and an obsessive dive int...

Fives often imagine themselves outside of time, but aging has a way of forcing us back into reality.

In this episode, we explore how Fives experience getting older—from bodies that don’t bounce back the way they used to, to the existential weight of midlife, to the surprising hope that comes with perspective. We share stories about family, health, autonomy, and regret, but also about the freedom, wisdom, and community that emerge wh...

Some people think procrastination is just poor time management, but for Fives it’s often much deeper.

In this episode, we explore how procrastination shows up for us in uniquely Five ways, from building things up in our heads until they feel impossible, to putting off the projects we care about most because they expose our deepest fears and insecurities. We swap ridiculous (and relatable) stories, dig into the hidden reasons we dela...

Fives are known for their sharp minds, but does that mean we think we’re smarter than everyone else?

In this live episode, we take on a common misconception about Fives—arrogance—and explore where it comes from, why it isn’t the whole story, and what’s really going on beneath the surface. Along the way we share personal updates, talk about growth edges, and wrestle with a brutally hard “Would You Rather?”

IN THIS EPISODE:

• Red, Yel...

What happens when you're a Five and a mom?

This week’s episode is a special podcast takeover by Enneagram experts Sam E. Greenberg, PhD and Melissa Kircher—both Fives and both moms. They swap stories, laugh about their quirks, and get painfully honest about the challenges and strengths of navigating motherhood as a Five. Whether you’re a Five parent yourself or trying to understand one, this conversation pulls back the curtain ...

Some rabbit holes are deeper than others, and as Fives we often fall in headfirst.

In this episode, we explore the obsessive way Fives pursue information: how it starts, what fuels it, and what happens when it spirals out of control. We share personal stories of late-night research binges, conspiracy rabbit holes, and the paradox of being both empowered and paralyzed by too much knowledge. We also look at what pulls us out—how conne...

We Fives often pride ourselves on intellect, but emotional intelligence is a whole different skill set.

In this episode, Sam E. Greenberg, PhD. joins us to explore what emotional intelligence actually means, why it's challenging for Fives, and how our relationships have pushed us to grow. We share real-life stories about misreading emotions, struggling to stay in our bodies, and the surprising benefits we've discovered fro...

Fives often feel like outsiders, but what if the group we’ve always longed for already exists?

In this episode, we invite two longtime friends to join us for a candid conversation about what it’s really like to be friends with a Five. From hilarious stories to hard truths, we explore the highs and lows of maintaining deep, long-term friendships—especially when you tend to live in your head.

We reflect on shared histories, missed conn...

In this live episode, we explore a surprising tension many Fives feel: the deep desire to be known and understood, and the equally strong instinct to hide. We unpack what’s really behind our aversion to vulnerability, how our subtypes shape this dynamic, and what it takes to show up even when we’d rather stay in our heads.

We also check in on how we’re actually doing, share what we’ve been researching lately (spoiler: lots of ChatGP...

Fives pride ourselves on independence, but friendship requires letting people in.

In this honest and deeply personal episode, we explore what friendship means to us as Fives—and why it’s so complicated. We share stories of how our personalities have made friendship harder, how we’ve grown to value it more, and the unexpected ways we’re learning to show up more authentically and connect more deeply.

From childhood loneliness to cold p...

This is an After Thoughts episode, an unstructured, unedited debrief of everything we didn't say in the last episode—this time unpacking our conversation on intuition. 

And boy, does this one take some turns...

We get into how our Five wings shape the way we approach intuition, with Josiah leaning more into the mystical side while Cody stays grounded in practicality. That leads us into a discussion on how our worldviews have shi...

Fives rely on analysis and clarity, but intuition offers something logic can't: a deeper wisdom that defies explanation.

In this episode, we explore what intuition is, why Fives struggle to trust it, and how embracing it can positively influence our lives. We share our personal experiences with intuition, examine how it's different from emotional decision-making, and discuss unconventional theories that stretch our underst...

Can Fives really be expressive and outgoing? 

The stereotype says no—but we’re here to challenge that idea. In this episode, we unpack the myth that Fives are always quiet, reserved, and withdrawn, and we share our own experiences of learning to express ourselves in the world. Plus, we introduce a new structure for our live episodes, featuring a mix of community engagement, deep dives, and a little bit of fun.

We also announce huge c...

Fives value logic and control, but anxiety challenges both. 

In this episode, we explore how Fives experience anxiety, why we often rationalize instead of feeling it, and how avoiding it can make things worse. We share personal stories, unexpected ways anxiety manifests in the body, and strategies that have helped us manage it—including some unconventional ones.

We also dive into the tension between self-reliance and vulnerability, t...