May 6, 2025 • 47 mins
As Mother’s Day approaches, we celebrate the strength of single moms. Join Roy Patterson for a special conversation with a woman who walked this road, Michelle Lynn Senters, author and founder of SEEN ministry for Single Moms. With firsthand experience, Michelle offers practical wisdom and Biblical encouragement.
Today's Resource: The Unseen Companion
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Episode Transcript
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S1 (00:19):
Well. Hey there friends, welcome to another exciting edition of
equip with Chris Brooks! I'm so thrilled that you've joined
us today. Do me a favor strap on your seat
belt as we navigate through the contours of culture, as
always with the lens of the biblical worldview on. But
before we do that, let me remind you, this is
the day that the Lord has made. He is giving
(00:40):
it as a gift so that you and I can
rejoice and be glad in it. So let's do just that.
Let's follow the words of the Apostle Paul. Let's rejoice
in the Lord always. And again I say, rejoice. Today
I want you to help me welcome my good friend
Roy Patterson to the host seat. Roy is a man
of God who has ministered through radio and the pastorate
(01:01):
for decades. He's the host and originator of the Urban
Praise streaming channel, and also host Celebration of Praise and
Music for Sunday here on Moody Radio. Roy, thank you
for leading this edition of equip.
S2 (01:17):
Thank you so much, Chris. Hey. I am so glad
to be with you guys today. It really is an
opportunity to give God glory together. I'm also excited because
I've got a special friend on the line. Her name
is Michelle Lynn Centers. She wrote a book called The
Unseen Companion God and the Single Mother. She's raised two
(01:38):
daughters on her own and experienced many issues common to
single mothers financial issues, emotional trauma in children, the pursuit
of education, isolation from church, feelings of guilt and shame,
consequences of fatherlessness, and the challenges of relationships and remarriage.
Her message has been forged in her own journey as
(02:02):
a single mom, and has deepened through her years of
mentoring single moms and launching ministries geared to these special
folks in the local church. She founded an organization, a
ministry called the Scene Ministry for Single Moms, and has
enjoyed a career as an elementary art teacher. She loves
(02:23):
her roles now as a wife to Jeff, mom to
three girls, and most of all, a proud Nana. Michelle,
welcome to the show.
S3 (02:32):
Hi. Thank you so much for having me. It's a
pleasure to be here.
S2 (02:36):
It is a pleasure to have you. I started reading
the book and I could not put it down. Absolutely fascinating.
I want I want to say this. Let me get
this disclaimer out of the way. Um, I spent the
first 12 years of my life with my mom, who
was single. Uh, she faced divorce at, um, I guess
(02:56):
I was one years old, something like that. And so
the judge said, okay, you stay with with your mother
did that. And at age 12, she sent me to
live with my father. And we've always had a unique, wonderful,
close relationship. And so this kind of book, I think
shines a light on ladies that are often forgotten and
and sometimes even marginalized. I've got to ask you what
(03:19):
what caused you to write this book?
S3 (03:22):
Oh, goodness. It was actually kind of strange. I when
I first became a single mom, the title came to
me The Unseen Companion God with the single mom. Yeah.
And I'm like, God, I am in no position to
write a book. I don't know if I'm coming or going.
My head is barely above water. And but it just
(03:44):
stayed with me. And so I knew that someday I
might be called to record my journey to. To share
what I learned. And looking at my life, going through
my life with that perspective gave me a greater sense
of responsibility. Of course, as a single mom, you you
feel the weight of responsibility. But knowing that I might
(04:06):
be called to share it, um, increased that weight, I suppose.
And and that seed, it was just a seed that
was planted and and but it was planted in good
ground and it eventually it came to be, um, several
years after I remarried, I knew that it was time
to start sharing my story.
S2 (04:26):
Yeah. Powerful. Powerful story. You talk about nails and rocks
and buildings and stuff like that, which I thought was
so cool. So? So you start off that way. Um,
what was it that that made you kick the book
off in a way that sort of was architecture. Construction? Yeah.
(04:49):
Building on a firm foundation.
S3 (04:51):
Absolutely. The whole book is based on this premise that
we are building a home. It talks about there's a
section for the foundation, for the walls, for the roof.
And I start off with a story about being a
fort builder. I was a major fort builder as a kid,
and I always longed to create these secret places of isolation,
(05:12):
to create this life of my choosing. And my my
mom and dad wouldn't let me use a hammer. So
I was out there pounding rusty nails with rocks. It
probably would have been safer with a hammer, but we
just used what we could find in the alleyways and, uh,
made forts and but it a lot of times single
moms feel that their home is broken. And how do
(05:34):
they rebuild? And I think there is this belief system
that you you you don't have a full, um, oh,
just healthy home until you're unless if you're married or
unless if you remarry. And I wanted to kind of
break that misperception. Sure. And and take a look at
how do we build our home as single moms to
(05:55):
be healthy and vibrant and loving and kind and create
it to be the home and refuge of our choosing?
S2 (06:03):
Hey, I'm Roy Patterson. I'm sitting in for Chris Brooks
today on equipped. Our guest today is Michelle Lynn Centers.
I'd love for you to call in and be a
part of the program. Give me a call at (877) 548-3675.
That's (877) 548-3675. Now, Michelle, it's not like Kool-Aid. It's not
(06:25):
like one plus one is two. There there are some challenges.
There are some complications. It's it's complicated to the point
that it can cause despair. Um, you you really talk
about the emotional impact through throughout the book. Uh, what
do you say to single moms who feel like I'm.
(06:46):
I'm underwater? I don't know if I can go another day.
S3 (06:50):
Well, we serve a Jesus who pulls us from the depths,
don't we? And it is. It is a hard thing.
Ministry to single moms and receiving ministry myself as a
single mom. Sure you. We know that God loves us.
We know that he saves us from the depths. And
all these theological discussions are wonderful. But what about the
(07:12):
bill on the table? What about the lonely nights or
whatever it is that that our struggles are? Um, and,
you know, it's easy to set it aside and say, well,
God isn't paying my bills. You know, I have to
figure this out. And really, what we do is we
take in this book, I explore the main needs of
of a woman in general, but a single mom in particular. Um, provision, protection, uh, identity, companionship.
(07:42):
And we take a look at what is the human
need that we have and where does God come in
to fill us? To overflowing. And he does have this
ability to provide for us in ways that are unknown
to us. And so to those single moms with those struggles,
I just say, take heart and take hold of Jesus.
(08:02):
And it's it's easier said than done. It takes intentionality.
It takes a level of trust that is just inhuman.
But it can be done. And it's not to say
that we won't have struggles. We certainly will. Whether we're
married or single, the struggles will come. But do we
struggle alone or do we struggle with the lion? And
(08:24):
I say with the lion.
S2 (08:26):
Hmm hmm. Amen. Amen. This unseen companion. Uh, let's talk
about him for a second. Uh, what what did you
find about Jesus during that period in your life?
S3 (08:40):
Uh, I what I found about Jesus is that he
was so different than what I thought he would be. Um,
I needed to leave a marriage, and it was a
quite a struggle to make that decision. And I presumed
that he would be ashamed of me. Be disappointed that I. That,
(09:04):
you know, that I felt that I gave up, um,
I felt that the church would abandon me. And what
I found is Jesus deals so gently with women in
in opportune circumstances. If we can just look to the
Bible for examples. With that, how he treated the woman
at the well, the woman who was going to be
(09:25):
stoned to death. He treats them with the woman who
washed his feet with her hair. He treats them with
such love and compassion. In fact, the woman at the
well was the first person that he revealed himself as
a savior to. Yeah, and so what? That told me
God's word told me that I'm not abandoned. I am
(09:45):
not discounted or deemed invalid. I mean, deemed valueless. Instead,
I was counted. My tears were bottled. I was deemed
valuable and worth that he could express himself as my
savior to me, and I could become his beloved.
S4 (10:04):
Hmm. Hmm.
S2 (10:05):
It's interesting how you can have a storm on the outside.
And you allude to this in in your book. Mhm.
You know, you built the tent and I feel like
I'm right there with you. You built the tent. You
struggle to get it up.
S3 (10:21):
To the camping.
S2 (10:22):
Trip. Oh yeah. Just, just everything is is.
S3 (10:25):
A newly single mom.
S2 (10:26):
Oh my goodness. Yeah. You're doing your best. And, um,
you know, everything seems to be going okay. And then
you wake up and realize that, uh, a storm has
sort of blown things away, and, um, what I thought
was interesting. Not not just the external storm, but the
internal storm where.
S3 (10:44):
Yeah, I had to recognize my tent was broken.
S2 (10:47):
Yeah.
S3 (10:48):
Both the physical tent camping. But my home, my home
just needed to be repaired.
S2 (10:54):
Yeah. Yeah. It's fascinating how you can have external storm
and have an internal storm. Yes, I'm absolutely convinced that
when you do have the internal storm that can cause
you to give up to despair. But this unseen companion,
he makes a difference, doesn't he? All right, you know what?
(11:18):
Let's go to a break. Right now, you're listening to
equip with Chris Brooks. I'm Roy Patterson sitting in for him.
I'm fascinated by Michelle and what she has to offer.
You've got to stick around. I know you're going to
be blessed as well. I'd love for you to call me.
Call me at 87754836758775483675. We're talking to Michelle Lynn Centers.
(11:44):
Her book is called The Unseen Companion, dealing with the
struggles of single moms. It's a blessing you will enjoy
this again. The number is 758775483675. Give me a call
(12:04):
right now.
S1 (12:19):
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provide biblical wisdom for life's toughest questions. When you step
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(12:41):
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S2 (13:00):
Hey, I'm Ray Patterson sitting in for Chris Brooks right
here on equip. Our guest today is Michelle Lynn Centers. And, uh,
thrilled to have her talk about single moms. Okay, Michelle,
we were talking about what happens when you have all
the hopes, the dreams, the drive to build something in
(13:21):
the middle of a storm. But what do you do
when you've got a storm on the inside that seems
to be dragging you down?
S3 (13:29):
Oh, that's a such a good question. There's always these
external forces in the life, in the life of a
single mom. Things that are beyond our control. Perhaps it
has to do with child support that doesn't come in,
or being underemployed, or all these external storms, and they
seem to be raging so strongly at times that all
(13:50):
of our energy is going towards calming the storm, or
it feels like whack a mole sometimes. You know that
old game where you're dealing with this and then dealing
with this? But inside there's a storm too, as well
as within our children. And what single, what I found
is a single mom. And what I found through ministry
is single moms, is that single moms often become very, um,
(14:14):
capable of handling with as much grace and dignity as possible,
all these external things, handling their children's, um, emotions and
feelings about a divorce or whatever circumstance they might be under.
But what single moms tend to do is that they
put themselves last. Yeah. And when that happens and they
(14:36):
don't attend, we don't attend to our own needs and
feelings and healing and growth. Um, then it depletes us
to do the work that's ahead and to build this
legacy that we're still called to build. And so I
really encourage single moms to care for themselves. And that
doesn't mean going and getting your nails done. And you
(14:56):
know all this what the world looks like as self-care.
Although that might be beneficial. Um, it's really about caring
for your heart, caring for your soul, getting that time
in with God and understanding who you are in Christ
and and living in a mentally healthy way.
S4 (15:14):
Mm.
S2 (15:15):
That's good information. Hey, we've got Sherry from Pittsburgh on
the line. Let's go to line one. Sherry, what's your
question or comment for Michelle?
S5 (15:23):
Uh, the only comment I have is, um, I just
really wanted to thank her very much for writing such
a book for young, um, single moms or even older
single moms. Um, I went through a divorce. I had
four children. They were one and a half, two and
a half, three and a half and six. And yet
the Lord brought me through the whole entire thing. Then
(15:45):
I remarried, and, um, I had the love of my life,
and he passed away. And then I had six kids.
But God carried us through the whole entire way. And
I just want to share one short little story. I
won't take long, but, um, I had no food at all. And, um,
a woman, uh, heard about it. She came to my
(16:09):
house and I wasn't home, and my sliding glass door
was open, and she brought this other woman along with
her who was thinking about leaving her husband. And she
looked around and she saw my pictures of my small
children and everything. And with that, God convicted her to
stay with her husband. So the Lord used that. So
I just really want to give God the glory for you.
(16:31):
Stay close to the Lord and he'll take care of you.
S3 (16:34):
Oh, I'm so glad to hear how well he took
care of you in in your two times of being
a single mom. That is quite a story and glad
to hear of his faithfulness with you. For you.
S2 (16:45):
Really amazing. Sherry, I want you to hold on. I
want to send you the book The Unseen Companion by Michelle.
And as a matter of fact, we've got four more
copies to give away as well. So. Sherry. Don't hang up.
We've got that book coming your way. Okay. Hey, if
you want to give us a call right now, we'd
love to hear from you. It's (877) 548-3675. Give me a
(17:07):
call at (877) 548-3675. Love to give you the book. The
Unseen Companion by Michelle Lynn Centers. All right. So, Michelle,
many people, when they think of single moms, they think
of someone that is either divorced or promiscuous or widowed,
(17:29):
or they try to put them in a box of sorts. Yes.
You talked about identity a little while ago, and I
thought that is a key word. How do you get
out of the box and really receive the love of
Christ and live out your calling as a single mom?
S3 (17:45):
I think that's one of the harder things that single
mothers face. There's perceptions sometimes It's not all the time
that these perceptions are there, but sometimes there's perceptions at
work that they will miss a lot of work because
they have to take care of the kids. Or, um,
there's perceptions at churches. Unfortunately, churches can be one of
(18:06):
the harder places to go because there's constant reminders of
what is deemed as whole and intact and what is
deemed as broken. And to overcome those barriers, um, it
can be very difficult for a single mom. One of
the things that really helps is when churches include single
moms and not only to meet their needs, but to
(18:29):
give them just a place at the table, a place
to serve, a place to to grow and thrive. It's
so important. Identity is one of those paramount issues because
if we identify ourselves as broken, our brain has this.
Our brain believes what we tell it. Okay. And there's
something called confirmation bias, where if we believe we are broken,
(18:53):
we are looking through the at the world, through this
lens that is looking for validation of that. And we
are going to find lots of validation of our brokenness
as human beings. If we learn to tell ourselves I
am made whole in Christ, or I am a daughter
of the King, I am being made in his image,
(19:13):
then our brain believes that and looks for validation of
that in in, in what we see and what we do,
what we tell ourselves is hugely important. And so in
the book there is there's a section in the back
where there are all these scriptures about who we are
in Christ and learning to thwart the lies of the
(19:35):
enemy over us and instead proclaim the truth. The thing is,
is when I felt like a bad mother, if I let's,
let's say someone said something to me or caused me
to question myself. Sure, I felt like, oh, I'm a
terrible mom if I try to battle that in my
mind with my own thinking. I might it might look like, oh,
(20:00):
but but I'm a good mom. I love my kids.
I do this and you know, and I might try
to build myself up that way. But what ends up
happening is that eventually I circle back around to remembering
those hardships or times that I was less than a
good mom, and I come back into agreement with the enemy.
But if I battle those lies with the Word of God,
(20:24):
that's how Jesus battled his temptations.
S4 (20:27):
Absolutely.
S3 (20:27):
You battle the lies with the Word of God. The
enemy can't come and steal that. That is that is
truth in in all of its purity and wholeness. And
and that is powerful. That is that double edged sword.
S2 (20:41):
We need that. We absolutely need that. All right. So, um,
let's stick with identity for a second. One of the
things that I loved about your book, I mentioned this earlier,
is that you not only are stating facts, you're not
just giving me good exegesis of Scripture. It's really, really good.
You put your heart. You put your heart out there.
(21:02):
And so someone's walking down the road and it's the
road of identity. And they feel like, um, I've been
quoting scripture. Um, I've been memorizing scripture, uh, and they're
standing on it. Don't get me wrong, they are absolutely
standing on it. But I feel like there's some other
legs to this stool that they need as well. Am
(21:25):
I wrong? Is there some other components that help people
get the right identity? Let me give you an example.
Scripture says be not conformed to this world, but be
transformed by the renewing of your mind. And so for
that lady, let's call her Sally. She feels like, um. Yeah,
I got the word. Uh, what else do I need
(21:45):
to keep me upright.
S3 (21:47):
Right. That's a that's a good question. I think it
changes for each person what they what they need. There's
so many needs that we have. The the truth is,
is that being a Christian alone does not mean things
will go easier. Proclaiming God's word does not mean that
we're not going to struggle putting food on the table.
(22:09):
We will struggle and we will suffer as as Christians.
But sometimes we need to get to a point where
we can ask for help. Sometimes we just need to
put down our pride and ask for the help we need. Um,
and there is lots of help, especially in this country.
There is lots of help out there for single parents.
(22:29):
Sometimes we we need to work harder in an area.
Maybe we have an area of sin that we need
to look at and, and explore. And I mean, I
did I had to I had to look at myself
and sometimes it was easy to fall into a trap
of being a victim. As a single mom, I had
(22:51):
a lot of reasons to blame my situation on a
lot of a lot of things in my life. And
the longer I blamed and didn't take responsibility for my stuff,
it kept me trapped. So part of one of my
legs was taking full responsibility for myself and my children,
and do the best I can. Um, there's a lot
(23:12):
of legs, but getting connected with other people too is
is a huge leg.
S2 (23:18):
I get that, I do. Um, the scene ministry that
that you've developed, um, is that a fellowship? A big
part of that?
S3 (23:26):
Absolutely. Getting a lot of times we'll see single moms
come in and they'll say, I didn't know there were
other believing single moms out there. Wow. Who experienced the
same thing? And there is a type of relief that
you feel. Not that you would ever wish that upon
anybody else, but knowing that you're not alone in it.
(23:46):
And then these single moms get together and they strengthen
one another, and we just honestly don't have enough churches, um,
taking on the plight of single moms and providing a
space for them to be able to, to really nurture
and grow each other.
S4 (24:04):
Um.
S2 (24:05):
I'm thinking about a study I was involved in a
few years ago. Where there unfortunately, there are some folks
who are in a situation where, um, the husband has said,
if you leave me after I've traumatized you or emotionally, physically, etc.,
I will cut off all your money, you will have nothing.
(24:28):
So you are stuck or you are completely abandoned. Uh,
for that lady that's listening right now who's in that situation?
What do you say?
S3 (24:38):
Uh, first of all, I say I'm sorry. You don't
deserve that. You don't? Um. That is not of God.
And that is control and manipulation. And if someone is
being threatened because, honestly, money was used over me, too.
And and so I know what that is like to
(25:00):
to have a threat. My, my kids were also threatened
to that he would take custody of them. There's always
threats that are made to women as they're trying to
leave or as they're establishing a new life. Not always,
I should say sometimes. And and it's a it's a
manipulation tool. And my word to that person is to
(25:21):
stand strong, to support around you get get your reinforcement
in but to stand strong.
S2 (25:30):
Well that's helpful information. Thank you so, so much. We're
talking to Michelle Lynn Centers today. And the book is
called The Unseen Companion. I've got four books to give away.
I'd love to give one of them to you. Here's
the number to call 87754836758775483675. Uh, thrilled to be here
(25:52):
with you. And I'd love. I thank God for Chris
Brooks and what he brings on a daily basis. Stick around.
Equip will be back right after this. Welcome back to
(26:18):
equip with Chris Brooks. I'm Roy Patterson sitting in today.
Well our impact gift is Pilgrim's Progress in today's English
written by John Bunyan updated by James H. Thomas Pilgrim's
Progress well, it's a classic and it's guided believers for
over 350 years, but many Christians today haven't read it
(26:41):
because it was written in the old 17th century English.
That's why I'm excited to offer you Pilgrim's Progress in
today's English, which makes John Bunyan's timeless story understandable without
sacrificing its depth or its meaning. It's it's absolutely an amazing,
amazing book and has blessed many people love for you
(27:05):
to have it. I'd love to put it in your hands.
Would you make a donation toward equipped or. You got
to do is go to equipped radio.org that's equipped radio.org,
or you can call (888) 644-4144. That's 888644414. For a donation
of any size will be a blessing to us, and
(27:27):
you will absolutely love this book. I hope that you
will become an equipper today. Hey, we're talking to Michelle
Lin Centers and fascinating conversation about single moms want to
say in advance, Happy Mother's Day. Single. Married, black. White. Latino, Asian.
(27:47):
Doesn't matter. Moms, we love you. Hey, we've got Michelle's
book here to give away. It's called The Unseen Companion.
And for those who call in, you've got a question
or a comment. Uh, you want to you want to
put forth a prayer request. We would love to put
this book in your hand if you are the next
(28:10):
four callers, here's the number to call (877) 548-3675. I'd love
to get your comment. (877) 548-3675. Okay. Roy Patterson sitting in
for Chris Brooks. Michelle, you mentioned in the book that
there was a situation that you were in and you
(28:31):
had a stalker. Can you talk about it?
S3 (28:34):
Yes, I can. Um, soon after I was newly married, um,
with my first marriage. Uh, I received a letter in
the mail, uh, saying that someone was watching me, and
he made threats towards me, and it was quite graphic
in nature. It was sexual in nature. It was violent.
(28:56):
And those letters kept coming for a period of five years. Um,
and my then husband, uh, we had moved and not
told anybody where we were moving to, and that stalker
still found me. And eventually the threats went towards my daughter. And, uh,
(29:16):
and it was a torturous experience because we didn't know
who it was, and, um, it was terrifying.
S4 (29:24):
Hmm hmm.
S2 (29:26):
Do you feel like, uh, the stalkers mentality is I
have a right to have you and to treat you
whatever way I want to, and you have no recourse.
S3 (29:37):
Yes. Um, there were certainly there were, uh, detailed explanations
about what was going to be done.
S4 (29:44):
Oh, my.
S3 (29:45):
To me. And so there was a certain part of
it that was that he had a right to do
whatever he wanted. Um, but I mean, quite honestly, in,
in my life, a lot of what I had experienced
in life from men was that I didn't have rights.
This is not something that is unique to stalking. Many
(30:07):
women have gone through experiences in which their danger might
look different, but they don't have a right to say no.
They don't have a right to be safe. They don't
have a right to say what kind of home they
want their children to be raised in. That is not
an uncommon feeling among women, actually.
S4 (30:26):
Um hmm.
S2 (30:28):
We're talking with Michelle Linn Centers today. The book is
called The Unseen Companion, and it's a powerful, powerful book.
For the next four callers, we're going to put the
book in your hand. You have to make a comment
or have a question or a prayer request. Uh, again,
the book is called The Unseen Companion. The number is 87754836758775483675.
(30:55):
We're going to go to line one right now. We've
got Natalia on the line. Natalia, go ahead with your
question or comment.
S6 (31:02):
Hi how are you? Thank you for taking my call.
S4 (31:04):
Sure.
S6 (31:06):
Um, so I'm a single mom. I have been in
this journey for the past three and a half years. Um,
and by the grace of God, I have a very
strong community to support my son and I and our
church and a lot of people that are very much
involved and are in our lives. And, um, my son's
father is not involved in his life. So with that said,
(31:27):
my question is, I know you said about, um, sometimes
we struggle with the idea of believing that our home
is broken until we find that next marriage, or we
have a father figure. And that's very much my struggle.
But my question is, sometimes, even though we have that
strong community and the strong church around us, um, sometimes
(31:51):
my son and I can still feel like we don't
belong because most of those communities have strong households of
mom and dad and kids. And right from the outside,
looks like everything is put together. And I had it
dealt with the questions of my son asking why I
don't have that right. So my question, I guess, would
be how to deal with that in that situation. And
(32:14):
I know the Lord gave us the wisdom and discernment
each day as we come to him. But I guess, um,
I wanted to hear your opinion on that.
S3 (32:23):
Oh, that's such a good question. And it is a
common struggle. We as mothers don't want to remove a
father from our child's lives, we see the importance of that. Um,
we just want that to be a healthy influence. And
and you're you're not alone in your struggle and in wanting.
And it's a good longing to want your children to
(32:46):
be fathered. Um, as as you wait for. Hopefully that
will happen someday. There are programs available and sometimes programs
within children's churches for mentoring, uh, programs and so forth,
or just getting around other families. And we had a
neighbor who, um, had a couple sons, but the dad
(33:08):
was just really involved, and my daughters would go and
play with them. And of course, you have to observe
very carefully. Um, we don't want to put our children
in any danger or risk, but one of the things
that I would offer would tell you, number one, is
that as a single mother, you're not designed to be
the father. You can't feel. We can't just press ourselves
(33:29):
to be fulfilled. Both worlds. Yes, we have to be
the nurturer and we have to be the disciplinarian. But
what I encourage you to do is teach your children
about God the Father, because he is a good father.
And the Bible is just filled with beautiful, rich stories
of how he fathers us. And, um, that's actually one
(33:52):
of the next books that I'm working on is The
Unseen Father Is Who God Is. For those of us
who have not felt fathered, that's where I would really
encourage you to go search out those scriptures and explore
that with your with your children and and let them
know how he is beside them as a, as a provider,
as a healer, as, you know, just that proud papa
(34:16):
kind of thing. He's our ABBA father. And that's where
I would lean in the most.
S2 (34:21):
That's wonderful. Natalia, I want you to hold on. We're
going to send you a copy of the book The
Unseen Companion by Michelle. please hold on. We'll get that
information in just a minute. Hey, let's go to line five.
Right now we've got Stan from Sarasota, Florida. Stan, please
go ahead.
S7 (34:37):
Oh, I so appreciate your program, because you so help
us to understand and to love people that are going
through other problems, that so many problems that they're having
with single mothers now. And as, as we understand them,
we can love and serve them so much better in
(34:58):
the church. And so I just want to say, thank
you so very much for putting these wonderful programs on
the air to help us to know what we should
be doing to love and serve our neighbors.
S2 (35:08):
Appreciate you. Hey, Michelle, for for folks like Stan who
really want to be a blessing to single moms, any advice?
S3 (35:17):
There's there. I have a lot of advice on that. Definitely.
Thank you, Stan, for that and for having your heart
open to those who are in need. There are always
needs within the single moms. The community we know, single
moms pulling them in, inviting them over for dinner, just
(35:37):
including them in your lives, letting letting go of any
misperceptions you might have and finding out what needs are now.
No one's going to. You know, I think sometimes when
we look at helping single moms, it feels a little overwhelming.
Like I might be asked to give too much, or
it might be overwhelming, or I might not know what
to say. And I would say, you get to have
(36:00):
boundaries with that. You don't have to extend beyond what
you can, and the Lord will give you the words
and the advice. And I mean, I remember once being
involved in a church and just going through a struggle,
a financial struggle, and I had written down exactly how
much I needed to make it. And the church said
(36:21):
that someone donated money for to bless a single mom.
And they chose me. Wow. And and I received. And
it was the exact amount that I needed. So I
just suggest to Stan and to people like that, just
to pray and ask for God to reveal a single
mom in need and and what are the ways. And
(36:43):
sometimes it's just to be a friend, to invite them
to sit next to in church or just to ask them, really,
how are you doing? You know, and being interested in
hearing their story.
S2 (36:54):
That's good stuff right there, Stan. Stick around. Hold on.
Don't hang up. Want to send you a copy of
the book The Unseen Companion by Michelle Lynn Centers. Uh, really, really, really,
really excited to have Michelle with us today. You got
to stick around. I want to hear some more stories
about God's provision, what we can do to, uh, let
these moms know you are seeing you're cared for. We
(37:19):
stand with you. And I think as we do that,
my brother and my sister, We can empower them and
we can advance the kingdom of God. I think it's
super important. I'd love to hear from you. Give me
a call at 87754836758775483675. For those that call, we do
(37:40):
have a copy of the book. I think we've got
two books left. Uh, the book is called The Unseen Companion,
so please give me a call. (877) 548-3675. We're talking to
Michelle Lynn Centers. I'm Roy Patterson. You're listening to equipped
with Chris Brooks.
S1 (38:04):
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S2 (38:42):
Hey, this is Roy Patterson sitting in for Chris Brooks.
What a wonderful man. Scholar, preacher, pastor and broadcaster. We
love him, love his family. He's certainly in our prayers.
Our guest today is Michelle Lynn Centers. Uh, we had
been talking about a stalker coming after her, and I
(39:04):
want to go back, and I want to finish this story. Michelle. Um.
What happened?
S3 (39:10):
Well, honestly, it never quite ended. It tapered off. I
never knew who the stalker was. He contacted me through
phone calls and through letters, and there were threats made
against me and my. My daughter and I and and
then it just ended at at one point. But as
(39:31):
many people know who have gone through terrifying things in
their life, just because the threat seems to have diminished,
that doesn't mean that fear changes in your life. And
it created it really caused me to become a fearful
person for quite some time and very, very, um, just
mama bear protective over my babies. And what God did
(39:54):
in the midst of that was, I mean, not only
did he keep us safe and and I'm, I'm painfully
aware that some women and children have not been safe
in their lives. And I am so sorry that you
have suffered. Um, in my situation with the stalking, um,
we were kept safe. But that fear just continued and
(40:16):
it overrided some areas of my life. It tempered Everything
that I experienced, and what God showed me in that
time is that yes, these bad things could happen. But
I am with you, but I am with you, but
I am with you. I will restore you. I will
heal you. I will mend these broken places and make
(40:37):
them whole. And as I learned to turn over my
fear to him and exchange that for his peace that
transcends all understanding, I became stronger and I became more, um.
I didn't allow it to control me, and I could
(40:57):
find my healing. Even in the midst of that terror
and the unknowing, I know that I probably will not
know that person's face until I get to heaven. I
have to rest in the security that God knows, and
and he has us, and he has my children.
S2 (41:15):
Powerful fear is so toxic and you do a lot
in your book concerning fear, I want to encourage people to, um,
to check out what you shared there. So, so important
that we choose Jesus. We choose peace. We choose God's power.
Thank you so much for sharing that testimony.
S3 (41:34):
Say one more.
S4 (41:35):
Thing, please.
S3 (41:36):
Is that there is something to say about allowing God
to give us that peace. The truth is, is I
still had to go out into the world and and
engage the world, even though there was a threat on me.
And and what I want to encourage women who are listening,
who might be in, um, a predicament, make sure that
(42:00):
you have the help you need, that there are people
around you who are aware of what's going on, aware
of any threats or dangers that you might be in,
as well as involving, uh, police or sheriff's or whoever
you need to involve to ensure your safety. I mean,
God protects us both through his word and and just
(42:22):
who he is, his presence in our lives. But he
also equips the people around us to also be that
hedge of protection.
S2 (42:31):
Good. That's really, really good. You are not alone. Please
don't be alone.
S4 (42:35):
No.
S2 (42:36):
That's good. That's really good advice. Hey, we're going to
line nine right now. We've got Corey from Georgia. Corey,
please go ahead with your question or comment.
S8 (42:46):
Yes. Hi. God bless you guys for doing this show. Um,
I'm a television producer, so I am happy to see
when people address some real issues out there, especially believers. Yes,
but I'm a widow and I have been since 2011. Um,
my late husband walked on water. I mean, not like Jesus,
but he was amazing. Uh, and he was a broadcaster
(43:09):
for CNN. And, um, we had a little girl who
watched him die of stage four bladder cancer. So his
story was told on CNN with doctor Sanjay Gupta. I
have struggled because I look at James 127 and it
doesn't matter what your walk of life is, but as believers,
(43:30):
I don't see it practiced, to be honest. And I've
called other radio shows about it and they're like, okay,
there's church ministries and this and that, but I don't
see it. And it's been a lot of years for me.
And just wondering if you could address that and how
I can get beyond this. And I don't say move on,
but live my life purpose.
S3 (43:51):
Absolutely. The scripture you're referring to, for those who might
not be familiar, is religion. That our God, that God
our Father accepts as pure and faultless, is this to
look after orphans and widows in their distress, and to
keep oneself from being polluted by the world? And, um,
the distress that you're referring to is quite common among
(44:11):
single moms is that we know that it is good
and right to care for widows and orphans. Sometimes churches
don't extend the definition of widows to include single moms.
And sometimes I don't know for myself. This isn't every church.
I've been involved in some beautiful churches that have cared
(44:32):
well for single moms. But sometimes there's this perception that
single moms feel, whether it's in your workplace or among friends,
or you know that you've gotten yourself into this situation.
You know, there's lots of other single moms, you know,
work on it, you know, kind of thing that you're
left on your own. And it's such a commonplace thing now.
But there is true need for single moms and for
(44:56):
the church to come along. I want to implore churches
to rise up and find out who are the single
moms in your community if who are the single moms,
not only within your four church walls, but who lives
by you? Because we are not just talking about the
lives of the single mom. We are talking about legacy.
We are talking about the children and their children's children
(45:19):
and their children's children. And it extends generations. And to
really break this cycle of brokenness or shame or poverty
or whatever it is, it's got to extend to the children.
So bringing a single mom into the fold brings in
the future generation into the folds of the church. And
shouldn't we be doing that more? So anybody who's listening,
(45:43):
if it if it's within you to go to your
pastor and say, hey, we need a single moms group.
I'm not a single parent, but I have a heart
for single parents. What can we do? There's resources available.
I know on my website I have a resource available
about developing community among single moms, and many groups have
(46:05):
used my book as a resource just to get it started.
And I encourage you to do that.
S2 (46:11):
Michelle, if people want to reach out to you, how
can they do it?
S3 (46:14):
They can reach out to me at my through my
website or at just at at com.
S2 (46:22):
Great. And how do you spell centers?
S3 (46:25):
Sure. It's s e n t e s.
S2 (46:28):
Okay. Give that email one more time, please.
S3 (46:31):
Sure. It's Michelle Lynn centers at gmail.com.
S2 (46:36):
Michelle, it's been a joy to be with you. Hard topic,
but a necessary conversation. Thank you so much for being
with us.
S3 (46:42):
Thank you. And Mary, just a happy Mother's Day to
all the mamas out there.
S2 (46:47):
Happy Mother's Day, you guys. Elroy Patterson sitting in for
Chris Brooks. This program is called equip. I pray that
you were blessed and you were edified by it. Hey, um,
this program is a part of the Moody Radio Network
under the umbrella of the Moody Bible Institute. I'm Roy.
I'll see you soon.
Well. Hey there friends, welcome to another exciting edition of
equip with Chris Brooks! I'm so thrilled that you've joined
us today. Do me a favor strap on your seat
belt as we navigate through the contours of culture, as
always with the lens of the biblical worldview on. But
before we do that, let me remind you, this is
the day that the Lord has made. He is giving
(00:40):
it as a gift so that you and I can
rejoice and be glad in it. So let's do just that.
Let's follow the words of the Apostle Paul. Let's rejoice
in the Lord always. And again I say, rejoice. Today
I want you to help me welcome my good friend
Roy Patterson to the host seat. Roy is a man
of God who has ministered through radio and the pastorate
(01:01):
for decades. He's the host and originator of the Urban
Praise streaming channel, and also host Celebration of Praise and
Music for Sunday here on Moody Radio. Roy, thank you
for leading this edition of equip.
S2 (01:17):
Thank you so much, Chris. Hey. I am so glad
to be with you guys today. It really is an
opportunity to give God glory together. I'm also excited because
I've got a special friend on the line. Her name
is Michelle Lynn Centers. She wrote a book called The
Unseen Companion God and the Single Mother. She's raised two
(01:38):
daughters on her own and experienced many issues common to
single mothers financial issues, emotional trauma in children, the pursuit
of education, isolation from church, feelings of guilt and shame,
consequences of fatherlessness, and the challenges of relationships and remarriage.
Her message has been forged in her own journey as
(02:02):
a single mom, and has deepened through her years of
mentoring single moms and launching ministries geared to these special
folks in the local church. She founded an organization, a
ministry called the Scene Ministry for Single Moms, and has
enjoyed a career as an elementary art teacher. She loves
(02:23):
her roles now as a wife to Jeff, mom to
three girls, and most of all, a proud Nana. Michelle,
welcome to the show.
S3 (02:32):
Hi. Thank you so much for having me. It's a
pleasure to be here.
S2 (02:36):
It is a pleasure to have you. I started reading
the book and I could not put it down. Absolutely fascinating.
I want I want to say this. Let me get
this disclaimer out of the way. Um, I spent the
first 12 years of my life with my mom, who
was single. Uh, she faced divorce at, um, I guess
(02:56):
I was one years old, something like that. And so
the judge said, okay, you stay with with your mother
did that. And at age 12, she sent me to
live with my father. And we've always had a unique, wonderful,
close relationship. And so this kind of book, I think
shines a light on ladies that are often forgotten and
and sometimes even marginalized. I've got to ask you what
(03:19):
what caused you to write this book?
S3 (03:22):
Oh, goodness. It was actually kind of strange. I when
I first became a single mom, the title came to
me The Unseen Companion God with the single mom. Yeah.
And I'm like, God, I am in no position to
write a book. I don't know if I'm coming or going.
My head is barely above water. And but it just
(03:44):
stayed with me. And so I knew that someday I
might be called to record my journey to. To share
what I learned. And looking at my life, going through
my life with that perspective gave me a greater sense
of responsibility. Of course, as a single mom, you you
feel the weight of responsibility. But knowing that I might
(04:06):
be called to share it, um, increased that weight, I suppose.
And and that seed, it was just a seed that
was planted and and but it was planted in good
ground and it eventually it came to be, um, several
years after I remarried, I knew that it was time
to start sharing my story.
S2 (04:26):
Yeah. Powerful. Powerful story. You talk about nails and rocks
and buildings and stuff like that, which I thought was
so cool. So? So you start off that way. Um,
what was it that that made you kick the book
off in a way that sort of was architecture. Construction? Yeah.
(04:49):
Building on a firm foundation.
S3 (04:51):
Absolutely. The whole book is based on this premise that
we are building a home. It talks about there's a
section for the foundation, for the walls, for the roof.
And I start off with a story about being a
fort builder. I was a major fort builder as a kid,
and I always longed to create these secret places of isolation,
(05:12):
to create this life of my choosing. And my my
mom and dad wouldn't let me use a hammer. So
I was out there pounding rusty nails with rocks. It
probably would have been safer with a hammer, but we
just used what we could find in the alleyways and, uh,
made forts and but it a lot of times single
moms feel that their home is broken. And how do
(05:34):
they rebuild? And I think there is this belief system
that you you you don't have a full, um, oh,
just healthy home until you're unless if you're married or
unless if you remarry. And I wanted to kind of
break that misperception. Sure. And and take a look at
how do we build our home as single moms to
(05:55):
be healthy and vibrant and loving and kind and create
it to be the home and refuge of our choosing?
S2 (06:03):
Hey, I'm Roy Patterson. I'm sitting in for Chris Brooks
today on equipped. Our guest today is Michelle Lynn Centers.
I'd love for you to call in and be a
part of the program. Give me a call at (877) 548-3675.
That's (877) 548-3675. Now, Michelle, it's not like Kool-Aid. It's not
(06:25):
like one plus one is two. There there are some challenges.
There are some complications. It's it's complicated to the point
that it can cause despair. Um, you you really talk
about the emotional impact through throughout the book. Uh, what
do you say to single moms who feel like I'm.
(06:46):
I'm underwater? I don't know if I can go another day.
S3 (06:50):
Well, we serve a Jesus who pulls us from the depths,
don't we? And it is. It is a hard thing.
Ministry to single moms and receiving ministry myself as a
single mom. Sure you. We know that God loves us.
We know that he saves us from the depths. And
all these theological discussions are wonderful. But what about the
(07:12):
bill on the table? What about the lonely nights or
whatever it is that that our struggles are? Um, and,
you know, it's easy to set it aside and say, well,
God isn't paying my bills. You know, I have to
figure this out. And really, what we do is we
take in this book, I explore the main needs of
of a woman in general, but a single mom in particular. Um, provision, protection, uh, identity, companionship.
(07:42):
And we take a look at what is the human
need that we have and where does God come in
to fill us? To overflowing. And he does have this
ability to provide for us in ways that are unknown
to us. And so to those single moms with those struggles,
I just say, take heart and take hold of Jesus.
(08:02):
And it's it's easier said than done. It takes intentionality.
It takes a level of trust that is just inhuman.
But it can be done. And it's not to say
that we won't have struggles. We certainly will. Whether we're
married or single, the struggles will come. But do we
struggle alone or do we struggle with the lion? And
(08:24):
I say with the lion.
S2 (08:26):
Hmm hmm. Amen. Amen. This unseen companion. Uh, let's talk
about him for a second. Uh, what what did you
find about Jesus during that period in your life?
S3 (08:40):
Uh, I what I found about Jesus is that he
was so different than what I thought he would be. Um,
I needed to leave a marriage, and it was a
quite a struggle to make that decision. And I presumed
that he would be ashamed of me. Be disappointed that I. That,
(09:04):
you know, that I felt that I gave up, um,
I felt that the church would abandon me. And what
I found is Jesus deals so gently with women in
in opportune circumstances. If we can just look to the
Bible for examples. With that, how he treated the woman
at the well, the woman who was going to be
(09:25):
stoned to death. He treats them with the woman who
washed his feet with her hair. He treats them with
such love and compassion. In fact, the woman at the
well was the first person that he revealed himself as
a savior to. Yeah, and so what? That told me
God's word told me that I'm not abandoned. I am
(09:45):
not discounted or deemed invalid. I mean, deemed valueless. Instead,
I was counted. My tears were bottled. I was deemed
valuable and worth that he could express himself as my
savior to me, and I could become his beloved.
S4 (10:04):
Hmm. Hmm.
S2 (10:05):
It's interesting how you can have a storm on the outside.
And you allude to this in in your book. Mhm.
You know, you built the tent and I feel like
I'm right there with you. You built the tent. You
struggle to get it up.
S3 (10:21):
To the camping.
S2 (10:22):
Trip. Oh yeah. Just, just everything is is.
S3 (10:25):
A newly single mom.
S2 (10:26):
Oh my goodness. Yeah. You're doing your best. And, um,
you know, everything seems to be going okay. And then
you wake up and realize that, uh, a storm has
sort of blown things away, and, um, what I thought
was interesting. Not not just the external storm, but the
internal storm where.
S3 (10:44):
Yeah, I had to recognize my tent was broken.
S2 (10:47):
Yeah.
S3 (10:48):
Both the physical tent camping. But my home, my home
just needed to be repaired.
S2 (10:54):
Yeah. Yeah. It's fascinating how you can have external storm
and have an internal storm. Yes, I'm absolutely convinced that
when you do have the internal storm that can cause
you to give up to despair. But this unseen companion,
he makes a difference, doesn't he? All right, you know what?
(11:18):
Let's go to a break. Right now, you're listening to
equip with Chris Brooks. I'm Roy Patterson sitting in for him.
I'm fascinated by Michelle and what she has to offer.
You've got to stick around. I know you're going to
be blessed as well. I'd love for you to call me.
Call me at 87754836758775483675. We're talking to Michelle Lynn Centers.
(11:44):
Her book is called The Unseen Companion, dealing with the
struggles of single moms. It's a blessing you will enjoy
this again. The number is 758775483675. Give me a call
(12:04):
right now.
S1 (12:19):
In today's rapidly changing culture, Christians need solid biblical guidance
more than ever. That's our mission here at Equip to
provide biblical wisdom for life's toughest questions. When you step
in as an equipper, you're not just giving your monthly
support helps to offer clarity and hope to a confused
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(12:41):
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S2 (13:00):
Hey, I'm Ray Patterson sitting in for Chris Brooks right
here on equip. Our guest today is Michelle Lynn Centers. And, uh,
thrilled to have her talk about single moms. Okay, Michelle,
we were talking about what happens when you have all
the hopes, the dreams, the drive to build something in
(13:21):
the middle of a storm. But what do you do
when you've got a storm on the inside that seems
to be dragging you down?
S3 (13:29):
Oh, that's a such a good question. There's always these
external forces in the life, in the life of a
single mom. Things that are beyond our control. Perhaps it
has to do with child support that doesn't come in,
or being underemployed, or all these external storms, and they
seem to be raging so strongly at times that all
(13:50):
of our energy is going towards calming the storm, or
it feels like whack a mole sometimes. You know that
old game where you're dealing with this and then dealing
with this? But inside there's a storm too, as well
as within our children. And what single, what I found
is a single mom. And what I found through ministry
is single moms, is that single moms often become very, um,
(14:14):
capable of handling with as much grace and dignity as possible,
all these external things, handling their children's, um, emotions and
feelings about a divorce or whatever circumstance they might be under.
But what single moms tend to do is that they
put themselves last. Yeah. And when that happens and they
(14:36):
don't attend, we don't attend to our own needs and
feelings and healing and growth. Um, then it depletes us
to do the work that's ahead and to build this
legacy that we're still called to build. And so I
really encourage single moms to care for themselves. And that
doesn't mean going and getting your nails done. And you
(14:56):
know all this what the world looks like as self-care.
Although that might be beneficial. Um, it's really about caring
for your heart, caring for your soul, getting that time
in with God and understanding who you are in Christ
and and living in a mentally healthy way.
S4 (15:14):
Mm.
S2 (15:15):
That's good information. Hey, we've got Sherry from Pittsburgh on
the line. Let's go to line one. Sherry, what's your
question or comment for Michelle?
S5 (15:23):
Uh, the only comment I have is, um, I just
really wanted to thank her very much for writing such
a book for young, um, single moms or even older
single moms. Um, I went through a divorce. I had
four children. They were one and a half, two and
a half, three and a half and six. And yet
the Lord brought me through the whole entire thing. Then
(15:45):
I remarried, and, um, I had the love of my life,
and he passed away. And then I had six kids.
But God carried us through the whole entire way. And
I just want to share one short little story. I
won't take long, but, um, I had no food at all. And, um,
a woman, uh, heard about it. She came to my
(16:09):
house and I wasn't home, and my sliding glass door
was open, and she brought this other woman along with
her who was thinking about leaving her husband. And she
looked around and she saw my pictures of my small
children and everything. And with that, God convicted her to
stay with her husband. So the Lord used that. So
I just really want to give God the glory for you.
(16:31):
Stay close to the Lord and he'll take care of you.
S3 (16:34):
Oh, I'm so glad to hear how well he took
care of you in in your two times of being
a single mom. That is quite a story and glad
to hear of his faithfulness with you. For you.
S2 (16:45):
Really amazing. Sherry, I want you to hold on. I
want to send you the book The Unseen Companion by Michelle.
And as a matter of fact, we've got four more
copies to give away as well. So. Sherry. Don't hang up.
We've got that book coming your way. Okay. Hey, if
you want to give us a call right now, we'd
love to hear from you. It's (877) 548-3675. Give me a
(17:07):
call at (877) 548-3675. Love to give you the book. The
Unseen Companion by Michelle Lynn Centers. All right. So, Michelle,
many people, when they think of single moms, they think
of someone that is either divorced or promiscuous or widowed,
(17:29):
or they try to put them in a box of sorts. Yes.
You talked about identity a little while ago, and I
thought that is a key word. How do you get
out of the box and really receive the love of
Christ and live out your calling as a single mom?
S3 (17:45):
I think that's one of the harder things that single
mothers face. There's perceptions sometimes It's not all the time
that these perceptions are there, but sometimes there's perceptions at
work that they will miss a lot of work because
they have to take care of the kids. Or, um,
there's perceptions at churches. Unfortunately, churches can be one of
(18:06):
the harder places to go because there's constant reminders of
what is deemed as whole and intact and what is
deemed as broken. And to overcome those barriers, um, it
can be very difficult for a single mom. One of
the things that really helps is when churches include single
moms and not only to meet their needs, but to
(18:29):
give them just a place at the table, a place
to serve, a place to to grow and thrive. It's
so important. Identity is one of those paramount issues because
if we identify ourselves as broken, our brain has this.
Our brain believes what we tell it. Okay. And there's
something called confirmation bias, where if we believe we are broken,
(18:53):
we are looking through the at the world, through this
lens that is looking for validation of that. And we
are going to find lots of validation of our brokenness
as human beings. If we learn to tell ourselves I
am made whole in Christ, or I am a daughter
of the King, I am being made in his image,
(19:13):
then our brain believes that and looks for validation of
that in in, in what we see and what we do,
what we tell ourselves is hugely important. And so in
the book there is there's a section in the back
where there are all these scriptures about who we are
in Christ and learning to thwart the lies of the
(19:35):
enemy over us and instead proclaim the truth. The thing is,
is when I felt like a bad mother, if I let's,
let's say someone said something to me or caused me
to question myself. Sure, I felt like, oh, I'm a
terrible mom if I try to battle that in my
mind with my own thinking. I might it might look like, oh,
(20:00):
but but I'm a good mom. I love my kids.
I do this and you know, and I might try
to build myself up that way. But what ends up
happening is that eventually I circle back around to remembering
those hardships or times that I was less than a
good mom, and I come back into agreement with the enemy.
But if I battle those lies with the Word of God,
(20:24):
that's how Jesus battled his temptations.
S4 (20:27):
Absolutely.
S3 (20:27):
You battle the lies with the Word of God. The
enemy can't come and steal that. That is that is
truth in in all of its purity and wholeness. And
and that is powerful. That is that double edged sword.
S2 (20:41):
We need that. We absolutely need that. All right. So, um,
let's stick with identity for a second. One of the
things that I loved about your book, I mentioned this earlier,
is that you not only are stating facts, you're not
just giving me good exegesis of Scripture. It's really, really good.
You put your heart. You put your heart out there.
(21:02):
And so someone's walking down the road and it's the
road of identity. And they feel like, um, I've been
quoting scripture. Um, I've been memorizing scripture, uh, and they're
standing on it. Don't get me wrong, they are absolutely
standing on it. But I feel like there's some other
legs to this stool that they need as well. Am
(21:25):
I wrong? Is there some other components that help people
get the right identity? Let me give you an example.
Scripture says be not conformed to this world, but be
transformed by the renewing of your mind. And so for
that lady, let's call her Sally. She feels like, um. Yeah,
I got the word. Uh, what else do I need
(21:45):
to keep me upright.
S3 (21:47):
Right. That's a that's a good question. I think it
changes for each person what they what they need. There's
so many needs that we have. The the truth is,
is that being a Christian alone does not mean things
will go easier. Proclaiming God's word does not mean that
we're not going to struggle putting food on the table.
(22:09):
We will struggle and we will suffer as as Christians.
But sometimes we need to get to a point where
we can ask for help. Sometimes we just need to
put down our pride and ask for the help we need. Um,
and there is lots of help, especially in this country.
There is lots of help out there for single parents.
(22:29):
Sometimes we we need to work harder in an area.
Maybe we have an area of sin that we need
to look at and, and explore. And I mean, I
did I had to I had to look at myself
and sometimes it was easy to fall into a trap
of being a victim. As a single mom, I had
(22:51):
a lot of reasons to blame my situation on a
lot of a lot of things in my life. And
the longer I blamed and didn't take responsibility for my stuff,
it kept me trapped. So part of one of my
legs was taking full responsibility for myself and my children,
and do the best I can. Um, there's a lot
(23:12):
of legs, but getting connected with other people too is
is a huge leg.
S2 (23:18):
I get that, I do. Um, the scene ministry that
that you've developed, um, is that a fellowship? A big
part of that?
S3 (23:26):
Absolutely. Getting a lot of times we'll see single moms
come in and they'll say, I didn't know there were
other believing single moms out there. Wow. Who experienced the
same thing? And there is a type of relief that
you feel. Not that you would ever wish that upon
anybody else, but knowing that you're not alone in it.
(23:46):
And then these single moms get together and they strengthen
one another, and we just honestly don't have enough churches, um,
taking on the plight of single moms and providing a
space for them to be able to, to really nurture
and grow each other.
S4 (24:04):
Um.
S2 (24:05):
I'm thinking about a study I was involved in a
few years ago. Where there unfortunately, there are some folks
who are in a situation where, um, the husband has said,
if you leave me after I've traumatized you or emotionally, physically, etc.,
I will cut off all your money, you will have nothing.
(24:28):
So you are stuck or you are completely abandoned. Uh,
for that lady that's listening right now who's in that situation?
What do you say?
S3 (24:38):
Uh, first of all, I say I'm sorry. You don't
deserve that. You don't? Um. That is not of God.
And that is control and manipulation. And if someone is
being threatened because, honestly, money was used over me, too.
And and so I know what that is like to
(25:00):
to have a threat. My, my kids were also threatened
to that he would take custody of them. There's always
threats that are made to women as they're trying to
leave or as they're establishing a new life. Not always,
I should say sometimes. And and it's a it's a
manipulation tool. And my word to that person is to
(25:21):
stand strong, to support around you get get your reinforcement
in but to stand strong.
S2 (25:30):
Well that's helpful information. Thank you so, so much. We're
talking to Michelle Lynn Centers today. And the book is
called The Unseen Companion. I've got four books to give away.
I'd love to give one of them to you. Here's
the number to call 87754836758775483675. Uh, thrilled to be here
(25:52):
with you. And I'd love. I thank God for Chris
Brooks and what he brings on a daily basis. Stick around.
Equip will be back right after this. Welcome back to
(26:18):
equip with Chris Brooks. I'm Roy Patterson sitting in today.
Well our impact gift is Pilgrim's Progress in today's English
written by John Bunyan updated by James H. Thomas Pilgrim's
Progress well, it's a classic and it's guided believers for
over 350 years, but many Christians today haven't read it
(26:41):
because it was written in the old 17th century English.
That's why I'm excited to offer you Pilgrim's Progress in
today's English, which makes John Bunyan's timeless story understandable without
sacrificing its depth or its meaning. It's it's absolutely an amazing,
amazing book and has blessed many people love for you
(27:05):
to have it. I'd love to put it in your hands.
Would you make a donation toward equipped or. You got
to do is go to equipped radio.org that's equipped radio.org,
or you can call (888) 644-4144. That's 888644414. For a donation
of any size will be a blessing to us, and
(27:27):
you will absolutely love this book. I hope that you
will become an equipper today. Hey, we're talking to Michelle
Lin Centers and fascinating conversation about single moms want to
say in advance, Happy Mother's Day. Single. Married, black. White. Latino, Asian.
(27:47):
Doesn't matter. Moms, we love you. Hey, we've got Michelle's
book here to give away. It's called The Unseen Companion.
And for those who call in, you've got a question
or a comment. Uh, you want to you want to
put forth a prayer request. We would love to put
this book in your hand if you are the next
(28:10):
four callers, here's the number to call (877) 548-3675. I'd love
to get your comment. (877) 548-3675. Okay. Roy Patterson sitting in
for Chris Brooks. Michelle, you mentioned in the book that
there was a situation that you were in and you
(28:31):
had a stalker. Can you talk about it?
S3 (28:34):
Yes, I can. Um, soon after I was newly married, um,
with my first marriage. Uh, I received a letter in
the mail, uh, saying that someone was watching me, and
he made threats towards me, and it was quite graphic
in nature. It was sexual in nature. It was violent.
(28:56):
And those letters kept coming for a period of five years. Um,
and my then husband, uh, we had moved and not
told anybody where we were moving to, and that stalker
still found me. And eventually the threats went towards my daughter. And, uh,
(29:16):
and it was a torturous experience because we didn't know
who it was, and, um, it was terrifying.
S4 (29:24):
Hmm hmm.
S2 (29:26):
Do you feel like, uh, the stalkers mentality is I
have a right to have you and to treat you
whatever way I want to, and you have no recourse.
S3 (29:37):
Yes. Um, there were certainly there were, uh, detailed explanations
about what was going to be done.
S4 (29:44):
Oh, my.
S3 (29:45):
To me. And so there was a certain part of
it that was that he had a right to do
whatever he wanted. Um, but I mean, quite honestly, in,
in my life, a lot of what I had experienced
in life from men was that I didn't have rights.
This is not something that is unique to stalking. Many
(30:07):
women have gone through experiences in which their danger might
look different, but they don't have a right to say no.
They don't have a right to be safe. They don't
have a right to say what kind of home they
want their children to be raised in. That is not
an uncommon feeling among women, actually.
S4 (30:26):
Um hmm.
S2 (30:28):
We're talking with Michelle Linn Centers today. The book is
called The Unseen Companion, and it's a powerful, powerful book.
For the next four callers, we're going to put the
book in your hand. You have to make a comment
or have a question or a prayer request. Uh, again,
the book is called The Unseen Companion. The number is 87754836758775483675.
(30:55):
We're going to go to line one right now. We've
got Natalia on the line. Natalia, go ahead with your
question or comment.
S6 (31:02):
Hi how are you? Thank you for taking my call.
S4 (31:04):
Sure.
S6 (31:06):
Um, so I'm a single mom. I have been in
this journey for the past three and a half years. Um,
and by the grace of God, I have a very
strong community to support my son and I and our
church and a lot of people that are very much
involved and are in our lives. And, um, my son's
father is not involved in his life. So with that said,
(31:27):
my question is, I know you said about, um, sometimes
we struggle with the idea of believing that our home
is broken until we find that next marriage, or we
have a father figure. And that's very much my struggle.
But my question is, sometimes, even though we have that
strong community and the strong church around us, um, sometimes
(31:51):
my son and I can still feel like we don't
belong because most of those communities have strong households of
mom and dad and kids. And right from the outside,
looks like everything is put together. And I had it
dealt with the questions of my son asking why I
don't have that right. So my question, I guess, would
be how to deal with that in that situation. And
(32:14):
I know the Lord gave us the wisdom and discernment
each day as we come to him. But I guess, um,
I wanted to hear your opinion on that.
S3 (32:23):
Oh, that's such a good question. And it is a
common struggle. We as mothers don't want to remove a
father from our child's lives, we see the importance of that. Um,
we just want that to be a healthy influence. And
and you're you're not alone in your struggle and in wanting.
And it's a good longing to want your children to
(32:46):
be fathered. Um, as as you wait for. Hopefully that
will happen someday. There are programs available and sometimes programs
within children's churches for mentoring, uh, programs and so forth,
or just getting around other families. And we had a
neighbor who, um, had a couple sons, but the dad
(33:08):
was just really involved, and my daughters would go and
play with them. And of course, you have to observe
very carefully. Um, we don't want to put our children
in any danger or risk, but one of the things
that I would offer would tell you, number one, is
that as a single mother, you're not designed to be
the father. You can't feel. We can't just press ourselves
(33:29):
to be fulfilled. Both worlds. Yes, we have to be
the nurturer and we have to be the disciplinarian. But
what I encourage you to do is teach your children
about God the Father, because he is a good father.
And the Bible is just filled with beautiful, rich stories
of how he fathers us. And, um, that's actually one
(33:52):
of the next books that I'm working on is The
Unseen Father Is Who God Is. For those of us
who have not felt fathered, that's where I would really
encourage you to go search out those scriptures and explore
that with your with your children and and let them
know how he is beside them as a, as a provider,
as a healer, as, you know, just that proud papa
(34:16):
kind of thing. He's our ABBA father. And that's where
I would lean in the most.
S2 (34:21):
That's wonderful. Natalia, I want you to hold on. We're
going to send you a copy of the book The
Unseen Companion by Michelle. please hold on. We'll get that
information in just a minute. Hey, let's go to line five.
Right now we've got Stan from Sarasota, Florida. Stan, please
go ahead.
S7 (34:37):
Oh, I so appreciate your program, because you so help
us to understand and to love people that are going
through other problems, that so many problems that they're having
with single mothers now. And as, as we understand them,
we can love and serve them so much better in
(34:58):
the church. And so I just want to say, thank
you so very much for putting these wonderful programs on
the air to help us to know what we should
be doing to love and serve our neighbors.
S2 (35:08):
Appreciate you. Hey, Michelle, for for folks like Stan who
really want to be a blessing to single moms, any advice?
S3 (35:17):
There's there. I have a lot of advice on that. Definitely.
Thank you, Stan, for that and for having your heart
open to those who are in need. There are always
needs within the single moms. The community we know, single
moms pulling them in, inviting them over for dinner, just
(35:37):
including them in your lives, letting letting go of any
misperceptions you might have and finding out what needs are now.
No one's going to. You know, I think sometimes when
we look at helping single moms, it feels a little overwhelming.
Like I might be asked to give too much, or
it might be overwhelming, or I might not know what
to say. And I would say, you get to have
(36:00):
boundaries with that. You don't have to extend beyond what
you can, and the Lord will give you the words
and the advice. And I mean, I remember once being
involved in a church and just going through a struggle,
a financial struggle, and I had written down exactly how
much I needed to make it. And the church said
(36:21):
that someone donated money for to bless a single mom.
And they chose me. Wow. And and I received. And
it was the exact amount that I needed. So I
just suggest to Stan and to people like that, just
to pray and ask for God to reveal a single
mom in need and and what are the ways. And
(36:43):
sometimes it's just to be a friend, to invite them
to sit next to in church or just to ask them, really,
how are you doing? You know, and being interested in
hearing their story.
S2 (36:54):
That's good stuff right there, Stan. Stick around. Hold on.
Don't hang up. Want to send you a copy of
the book The Unseen Companion by Michelle Lynn Centers. Uh, really, really, really,
really excited to have Michelle with us today. You got
to stick around. I want to hear some more stories
about God's provision, what we can do to, uh, let
these moms know you are seeing you're cared for. We
(37:19):
stand with you. And I think as we do that,
my brother and my sister, We can empower them and
we can advance the kingdom of God. I think it's
super important. I'd love to hear from you. Give me
a call at 87754836758775483675. For those that call, we do
(37:40):
have a copy of the book. I think we've got
two books left. Uh, the book is called The Unseen Companion,
so please give me a call. (877) 548-3675. We're talking to
Michelle Lynn Centers. I'm Roy Patterson. You're listening to equipped
with Chris Brooks.
S1 (38:04):
Are you struggling in your spiritual journey? Is it passing? Confusing.
Pilgrim's progress in today's English might be exactly what you need.
This modern version of John Bunyan's classical allegory illustrates the challenges,
temptations and victories every believer experiences, all in language that
(38:24):
you can easily understand and apply to your life. Request
your copy with the gift of any amount to support
equip this month. Call 888644 4144 or visit Equip Radio.com.
S2 (38:42):
Hey, this is Roy Patterson sitting in for Chris Brooks.
What a wonderful man. Scholar, preacher, pastor and broadcaster. We
love him, love his family. He's certainly in our prayers.
Our guest today is Michelle Lynn Centers. Uh, we had
been talking about a stalker coming after her, and I
(39:04):
want to go back, and I want to finish this story. Michelle. Um.
What happened?
S3 (39:10):
Well, honestly, it never quite ended. It tapered off. I
never knew who the stalker was. He contacted me through
phone calls and through letters, and there were threats made
against me and my. My daughter and I and and
then it just ended at at one point. But as
(39:31):
many people know who have gone through terrifying things in
their life, just because the threat seems to have diminished,
that doesn't mean that fear changes in your life. And
it created it really caused me to become a fearful
person for quite some time and very, very, um, just
mama bear protective over my babies. And what God did
(39:54):
in the midst of that was, I mean, not only
did he keep us safe and and I'm, I'm painfully
aware that some women and children have not been safe
in their lives. And I am so sorry that you
have suffered. Um, in my situation with the stalking, um,
we were kept safe. But that fear just continued and
(40:16):
it overrided some areas of my life. It tempered Everything
that I experienced, and what God showed me in that
time is that yes, these bad things could happen. But
I am with you, but I am with you, but
I am with you. I will restore you. I will
heal you. I will mend these broken places and make
(40:37):
them whole. And as I learned to turn over my
fear to him and exchange that for his peace that
transcends all understanding, I became stronger and I became more, um.
I didn't allow it to control me, and I could
(40:57):
find my healing. Even in the midst of that terror
and the unknowing, I know that I probably will not
know that person's face until I get to heaven. I
have to rest in the security that God knows, and
and he has us, and he has my children.
S2 (41:15):
Powerful fear is so toxic and you do a lot
in your book concerning fear, I want to encourage people to, um,
to check out what you shared there. So, so important
that we choose Jesus. We choose peace. We choose God's power.
Thank you so much for sharing that testimony.
S3 (41:34):
Say one more.
S4 (41:35):
Thing, please.
S3 (41:36):
Is that there is something to say about allowing God
to give us that peace. The truth is, is I
still had to go out into the world and and
engage the world, even though there was a threat on me.
And and what I want to encourage women who are listening,
who might be in, um, a predicament, make sure that
(42:00):
you have the help you need, that there are people
around you who are aware of what's going on, aware
of any threats or dangers that you might be in,
as well as involving, uh, police or sheriff's or whoever
you need to involve to ensure your safety. I mean,
God protects us both through his word and and just
(42:22):
who he is, his presence in our lives. But he
also equips the people around us to also be that
hedge of protection.
S2 (42:31):
Good. That's really, really good. You are not alone. Please
don't be alone.
S4 (42:35):
No.
S2 (42:36):
That's good. That's really good advice. Hey, we're going to
line nine right now. We've got Corey from Georgia. Corey,
please go ahead with your question or comment.
S8 (42:46):
Yes. Hi. God bless you guys for doing this show. Um,
I'm a television producer, so I am happy to see
when people address some real issues out there, especially believers. Yes,
but I'm a widow and I have been since 2011. Um,
my late husband walked on water. I mean, not like Jesus,
but he was amazing. Uh, and he was a broadcaster
(43:09):
for CNN. And, um, we had a little girl who
watched him die of stage four bladder cancer. So his
story was told on CNN with doctor Sanjay Gupta. I
have struggled because I look at James 127 and it
doesn't matter what your walk of life is, but as believers,
(43:30):
I don't see it practiced, to be honest. And I've
called other radio shows about it and they're like, okay,
there's church ministries and this and that, but I don't
see it. And it's been a lot of years for me.
And just wondering if you could address that and how
I can get beyond this. And I don't say move on,
but live my life purpose.
S3 (43:51):
Absolutely. The scripture you're referring to, for those who might
not be familiar, is religion. That our God, that God
our Father accepts as pure and faultless, is this to
look after orphans and widows in their distress, and to
keep oneself from being polluted by the world? And, um,
the distress that you're referring to is quite common among
(44:11):
single moms is that we know that it is good
and right to care for widows and orphans. Sometimes churches
don't extend the definition of widows to include single moms.
And sometimes I don't know for myself. This isn't every church.
I've been involved in some beautiful churches that have cared
(44:32):
well for single moms. But sometimes there's this perception that
single moms feel, whether it's in your workplace or among friends,
or you know that you've gotten yourself into this situation.
You know, there's lots of other single moms, you know,
work on it, you know, kind of thing that you're
left on your own. And it's such a commonplace thing now.
But there is true need for single moms and for
(44:56):
the church to come along. I want to implore churches
to rise up and find out who are the single
moms in your community if who are the single moms,
not only within your four church walls, but who lives
by you? Because we are not just talking about the
lives of the single mom. We are talking about legacy.
We are talking about the children and their children's children
(45:19):
and their children's children. And it extends generations. And to
really break this cycle of brokenness or shame or poverty
or whatever it is, it's got to extend to the children.
So bringing a single mom into the fold brings in
the future generation into the folds of the church. And
shouldn't we be doing that more? So anybody who's listening,
(45:43):
if it if it's within you to go to your
pastor and say, hey, we need a single moms group.
I'm not a single parent, but I have a heart
for single parents. What can we do? There's resources available.
I know on my website I have a resource available
about developing community among single moms, and many groups have
(46:05):
used my book as a resource just to get it started.
And I encourage you to do that.
S2 (46:11):
Michelle, if people want to reach out to you, how
can they do it?
S3 (46:14):
They can reach out to me at my through my
website or at just at at com.
S2 (46:22):
Great. And how do you spell centers?
S3 (46:25):
Sure. It's s e n t e s.
S2 (46:28):
Okay. Give that email one more time, please.
S3 (46:31):
Sure. It's Michelle Lynn centers at gmail.com.
S2 (46:36):
Michelle, it's been a joy to be with you. Hard topic,
but a necessary conversation. Thank you so much for being
with us.
S3 (46:42):
Thank you. And Mary, just a happy Mother's Day to
all the mamas out there.
S2 (46:47):
Happy Mother's Day, you guys. Elroy Patterson sitting in for
Chris Brooks. This program is called equip. I pray that
you were blessed and you were edified by it. Hey, um,
this program is a part of the Moody Radio Network
under the umbrella of the Moody Bible Institute. I'm Roy.
I'll see you soon.
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The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Therapy Gecko
An unlicensed lizard psychologist travels the universe talking to strangers about absolutely nothing. TO CALL THE GECKO: follow me on https://www.twitch.tv/lyleforever to get a notification for when I am taking calls. I am usually live Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays but lately a lot of other times too. I am a gecko.
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.