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May 8, 2025 • 47 mins

Feeling stressed? You're not alone. Over a quarter of U.S. adults say they’re so overwhelmed, they can’t function—and our teens and kids are struggling too. But there’s hope. Roy Patterson talks with Dr. Charles Stone about how the wisdom of the Bible and the insights of brain science can help us manage stress and anxiety with courage and grace. Tune in for a practical conversation you won’t want to miss!

Today's Resource: Stress Less: 9 Habits from the Bible and Brain Science to Build Resiliance and Reduce Anxiety

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This month's featured resourcePilgrim's Progress in Today's English

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Episode Transcript

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S1 (00:20):
Well. Hey there friends, welcome to another exciting edition of
equip with Chris Brooks! I'm so thrilled that you've joined
us today. Do me a favor strap on your seat
belt as we navigate through the contours of culture, as
always with the lens of the biblical worldview on. But
before we do that, let me remind you, this is
the day that the Lord has made. He is giving

(00:40):
it as a gift so that you and I can
rejoice and be glad in it. So let's do just that.
Let's follow the words of the Apostle Paul. Let's rejoice
in the Lord always. And again I say, rejoice. Today
I want you to help me welcome my good friend
Roy Patterson to the host seat. Roy is a man
of God who has ministered through radio and the pastorate

(01:01):
for decades. He's the host and originator of the Urban
Praise streaming channel, and also host Celebration of Praise and
Music for Sunday here on Moody Radio. Roy, thank you
for leading this edition of equip.

S2 (01:17):
So, so excited to be here with you guys. Grateful
for Chris and got some exciting news. He's going to
be live in studio on Monday. I cannot wait to
see him, to hear him, and to experience what God
is doing in his life. We're excited, excited, excited about that.
So make sure you tune in on Monday as well.

(01:39):
It's going to be a good time. Well, I hope
you're enjoying this day. It's, uh, sort of sunny here
in Chicago. I hope it's sunny where you're at. If not, uh,
let's go on and press on. And let the light
of God's love shine through. Okay. Hey, I got a
special guest with me today. This guy has served for
43 years in vocational ministry. 30 of those years as

(02:02):
a senior pastor. He recently completed a nine year role
as lead pastor of West Park Church in London, Ontario, Canada,
a multicultural congregation with over a thousand members and attendees.
He has authored eight books and now is coaching pastors
and leaders, and over 300 of his articles have appeared

(02:25):
in magazines and online publications such as Outreach Magazine, Leadership Journal,
Pastors Sermon, Central.com, and so many more. He and his wife, Cheryl,
have been married for 44 years and have three adult
children and five grandchildren. Help me welcome our good friend,

(02:48):
Pastor Charles Stone. Doctor Stone, how are you?

S3 (02:51):
I am doing great, Roy. Great to be with you today.

S2 (02:55):
So good to be with you today as well. You've
authored a book called Stress Less nine habits from the
Bible and Brain Science to build Resilience and Reduce Anxiety.
By the way, we're going to give away five copies
of those. And so you guys have to be prepared
to call. Here's the number to call. It's 877548367587754836750. Charles,

(03:24):
when you say stress what's what's your your definition.

S3 (03:29):
That is a really good, uh, good question. The way
I answer that question is imagine a coin, you know,
the proverbial two sides of a coin. One side of
that stress coin would be like the event that potentially
can cause us to feel stress. Something out there, you know,
something in our lives or even something we make up
in our minds. So that's one side of the coin

(03:51):
and defining it. The other side of the stress coin
is how we respond to stress. So there are kind
of two sides and actually two flavors as well. On
the one hand, there's acute stress. And I felt a
little bit of that as we were getting ready for
this time together. Like I didn't have the quite buttons pushed. Right.
You know. Sure, sure. Electronics work. And so your stress rose.

(04:15):
But you you have very calm voice. You calm me down.
So that was acute stress. You know, we need that
kind of motivates us. But then there's the chronic stress.
Got it. That's what's bad for you. So in a
very simple definition, stress is our body and brain's natural
response to real or perceived threats or demands. Hmm. That's

(04:38):
a simple definition. And, uh, Roy, uh, when I was
a kid, I would go camping quite a bit. And
I want to illustrate how that issue of real and
perceived places way out. So let's say I went camping
with some buddies. Okay. I was in my pup tent.
We went to bed and. But then we heard this
noise and commotion outside our tent. We just knew. I'm

(05:01):
making this up now. Right now it's a grizzly bear.
We're going to get eaten alive. And so we're just
shivering in our sleeping bags. Next morning, we Morning, we
slowly open the flap of the tent. We look over
the table and we realized, no, it wasn't a bear.
It was a raccoon eating that bag of Cheetos we
left out. Oh my. Now the stress response. That's kind

(05:21):
of a made up story. The stress response went up,
but it was based on perception, not reality. So we
can experience stress even though the the situation is not stressful.
So that's a good way to kind of tie a
bow around it.

S2 (05:38):
Yeah. Okay. That's a good bow that you tied right there. Um,
all right. So our world is so stressful. People are
losing jobs. People are going through relationship crisis. Um, start
taking us down, down, down a path of, uh, dealing
with reality, not being in denial. And yet, at the

(05:59):
same time, being able to cope. You got some steps
for us to take.

S3 (06:04):
Yeah. Um, I'll kind of tell you the genesis of that.
People always interested in that. Sure. The genesis of writing
this book came pre-COVID. My wife and I were on
a vacation. It's one of these vacations where there's, like
buffets open 24 over seven. I love buffets. Yeah. Yeah.
It was great. But there was a problem with this place.
We stayed. They had Wi-Fi everywhere. Now I'm a news junkie,

(06:28):
and I was following this thing called Covid. You know, like,
what's going to happen? I told my wife, I said,
you know what? When we get back to Canada, I
bet you they're going to shut us down. Sure. Is
the world a draconian shut down? We couldn't meet as
a church. I was a pastor up there at the time.
We couldn't meet in groups. We couldn't even meet in homes.
And I remember 2 or 3 days after they shut

(06:50):
us down, that it dawned on me that I was
now going to have to lead a church of a
thousand through a tiny pinhole camera on my computer. And, Roy,
I distinctly remember saying this God, I did not sign
up for this now. During that similar time span, I

(07:11):
was down with an AFib. That's when your heart doesn't
beat right?

S2 (07:15):
Oh, wow.

S3 (07:16):
I was diagnosed as pre-diabetic. I exercise, I eat my broccoli,
and I was diagnosed with cancer. All of that happened
about that same time. The irony was I was working
on my dissertation. PhD dissertation on stress. Wow. I thought, okay, Lord,

(07:37):
I guess I'm going to be the guinea pig on this.
So that's really the genesis of how I wrote this.
And it ties together biblical truth, what we know about
brain science with some very practical steps that you referred
to in your question. So that's really where it came from.
And that's.

S2 (07:56):
Fascinating.

S3 (07:57):
Where it is now.

S2 (07:58):
It's funny how God will allow you to experience what
you're going to share with others. And so, yeah, you're
not you're not just sharing from some, uh, mental assent place, but. Yeah,
I've walked through this valley.

S3 (08:12):
That's exactly right. I was experiencing it. For real.

S2 (08:15):
Yeah, yeah. And that can be stressful, needless to say.
All right. So. So what can you share about our
brains and what happens to our bodies when there is
chronic stress?

S3 (08:26):
Yeah. Yeah. Well, remember those two flavors. The acute stress
that comes and goes. We need that to get motivated
to get out of bed and to do what we
need to do. But chronic stress occurs when that stress event,
whatever it is, is perpetually out there. It could be weeks, months, years,
and we respond to it in a healthy way. When

(08:46):
that happens, there's a hormone. Many people have heard of
the stress hormone cortisol. Now it's not all bad. We
need it. But when cortisol remains high for a long time,
it really affects us negatively. It impairs our memory. It
impairs our thinking, it reduces motivation. It hurts our body

(09:08):
and our brain. We can gain weight. We eat too much.
It affects us. It disrupts sleep. It magnifies emotional pain
and lowers our reactivity threshold. You know, like we can
easily get angry at somebody and we can say things
we shouldn't. Sure. So when we're on that high level,
boy does it does damage not only to our bodies

(09:29):
and brains, but to our relationships as well. And it also,
I believe, affects our walk with God. Because so we're
we're so preoccupied with some of these unhealthy thoughts and
these debilitating emotions. So chronic stress is not a good thing.

S2 (09:45):
Hmm. Well, it's not, and it can be so detrimental. Hey,
I want to talk about how, um, we can paint
a picture in our heads. And this goes back to
your original statement. You paint a picture of something that
is super stressful. That's difficult. You think it's a grizzly,
but it's really a raccoon. And I want to talk

(10:06):
about how we can sort of take the paintbrush out
of the hands of fear and doubt and worry, and
I really do believe what we're talking about today. There
are so many moms who are going through stressful times
with young children there. There are women who are in
business that are going through, men who are in business,
who are going through. And I think that this is extremely,

(10:29):
extremely timely. And so I'm very, very grateful, extremely grateful
that you're doing what you're doing today. So I want
folks to give us a call. Here's the number to call.
It's 87754836758775483675. We've got a book that we want to
give away today. When you call and you make a comment,

(10:52):
we'd love to put that book in your hand. It's
written by our guest today, Charles Stone. It's about stress.
It's an incredible book. It's going to be an incredible resource.
You're going to enjoy it. It's called stress less nine
habits from the Bible and Brian Brain Science to build
resilience and reduce anxiety. Again, we're going to give away

(11:15):
five of these books. It's going to be incredible. So
you guys got to call in. Got to make a
comment on air. Maybe you've got a prayer request, or
you've got the kind of question that will not only
help you, but maybe it'll help some other people as well.
I'm Roy Patterson. I'm sitting in for Chris Brooks. This
is equipped.

S1 (11:38):
Are you struggling in your spiritual journey? Is it passing? Confusing.
Pilgrim's progress in today's English might be exactly what you need.
This modern version of John Bunyan's classical allegory illustrates the challenges,
temptations and victories every believer experiences, all in language that
you can easily understand and apply to your life. Request

(12:01):
your copy with the gift of any amount to support
equip this month. Call 888644 4144 or visit Equip radio.org.

S2 (12:15):
Welcome back to equipped. I'm Roy Patterson. Thanks so much
for being with me. I'm sitting in for Chris Brooks.
That's my brother. Love him. I'm so excited. He's going
to be back live in studio on Monday. You got
to make it a point to tune in to check
him out. He's going to give us an update on
what's been going on, and we can't wait to love

(12:36):
on him. Our guest today is Charles Stone. He's written
a wonderful book about stress. And if you know anything
about life, you know anything about love. You know anything
about relationships. Work. ET cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Yeah.
You know about stress. And I believe that God has
a solution. He's got the right answer. And so Pastor

(12:59):
Charles is going to share some of those concepts with
us today. Hey, we've got Jack on line one. He's
calling from Springfield, Illinois. Jack, go ahead with your question
or comment.

S4 (13:12):
Uh. Yes, sir. Uh, my name is Jack Davis, and, um,
I am a Vietnam veteran. Okay. And, um, I was
at Bible study this morning, and I ran across this
one verse that I believe that is very, very. It it, uh,

(13:36):
how I want to say it. It sinks into the soul.
And it's, uh, in Matthew 21, verse 22. Whatever you
whatever things you ask in prayer and believe, you shall receive.

S2 (13:55):
I like that verse. I like that verse a lot. Hey,
Pastor Charles, you want to make a comment on that?

S3 (14:02):
Uh, yeah. Jack, thank you so much for calling in.
And I want to say thank you so much for
your service. Amen. Uh, we we words can't explain enough
for how much we're so grateful to our servicemen and women.
And first of all, God's word is what I call
the umbrella capital T truth. You've heard the phrase all

(14:24):
truth is God's truth. And Saint Augustine Calvin said that.
But the umbrella truth, capital T is God's word. Amen.
All other truths. Small T falls below that. Like, you know, uh,
botany or engineering principles. It's truth, but it's not capital
T truth. And you're sharing that verse just reminds us

(14:45):
the importance of grounding our lives in God's Word, in
dealing with stress, dealing with difficulty, dealing with a pleasant
time to grounding our our thinking in his words. So
thank you so much for sharing that verse.

S4 (15:00):
Oh thank you.

S2 (15:01):
I thank you, Jack.

S4 (15:03):
I do enjoy Chris's program whenever I can catch it.
I mean, I've been listening to Chris Fabry for a
couple of years now and I really enjoyed his teaching.
I listened to it whenever I can. And Chris, if
you're listening today, God bless you and keep the faith.

S2 (15:24):
Amen. That's wonderful. Hey. Hey, Jack, I want you to
hold on. We're going to send you a copy of
the book. Uh, stress less nine habits from the Bible
and brain science to build resilience and reduce anxiety. Hold on.
We're going to get your information. All right. Right now
we're going to go to line three. We're going to
talk to Anne from Iowa. Anne, go ahead with your
question or comment.

S5 (15:46):
Hi there. Thanks for having me on. I appreciate that
the pastor is speaking about the multifactorial aspect of stress.
It's not only spiritual, there's physical things and the brain
science and how we can cope. My question is about
when it's not a raccoon, it's really a bear. Yeah. And, um,

(16:06):
I have two people I dearly, dearly, dearly love who
are just going through chaotic situations. And, um, it really is,
and I guess so part of it is like, what
do you do when it really is a bear? And
then also how, you know, I have one of those
people is someone who follows Jesus and is clinging, you know,
tightly as you can, and one is someone who I
love and they're not really interested in that. And just

(16:27):
trying to support them in in the scary bear season,
that doesn't really seem to have, um, an end in
sight at the moment and, um, getting through that.

S3 (16:41):
Well, and that is, uh, a multifaceted question with the really,
really good ones. And I'll just give you a couple
of thoughts. Those who know Christ, if we are followers
of Jesus, uh, we have the Holy Spirit living within us.
We have God's grace that we're experiencing, which is the
power source to be able to deal with the real bears.

(17:04):
And when we. My illustration of the bears, the raccoon
was just pointing out that sometimes we can build stuff
in our heads, but sometimes it really is a bear
out there. We have to acknowledge it. Stuffing it actually is,
is very, very detrimental. I would say one of the
one of the practices that I write about is one

(17:27):
that I think is fundamental for everyone, whether it's a
small stressor or a large stressor. Of course, there has
to be the want to. You mentioned two different people
in your life. One is interested in spiritual things. You know,
they're connected there. The other is not. But this is
a practical tool that I have found and that the

(17:48):
Bible I think, reinforces as well as science is called
seas and breathe. They think about the breath. You know,
we're breathing all the time. Uh, in the Bible, we
see the breath quite often. In Genesis, God breathed into Adam.
He became a living being. And Jesus breathed on the
early disciples. The Holy Spirit came. David wrote in Psalm.

(18:08):
Let everything that has breath praise the Lord. Now, this season, breathe.
It's based on a very interesting neuroscience insight that deep breathing,
especially extending the exhale, activates the vagus nerve, which is
a key nerve in our system that helps calm us.

(18:29):
That deep breathing activates that nerve that dampens the stress response.
Does it make the the all the difficult emotions go away?
But there's a little breathing technique that I recommend. It's
called what I call the sniff breath. And in the
situation where you're facing stress, first thing is just stop.

(18:49):
Pull away if you can and get, get Get a loan.
Pull away from that difficult. You know, if you're having
an argument with someone or pull off the side of
the road, here's a sniff breath. Breathe in as much
as you can. Then breathe. Then another sniff of breath.
Hold it for a couple of seconds, then exhale through
your nose and make the exhale go longer than the inhale.

(19:12):
That is a in the moment tool that science tells
us really does, uh, dial down the stress response. So.
And your question was multifaceted, but that is one simple
tool that we can take with us. We don't need
a phone. We don't need a book. We just need
to remember to do it. And it really will dial

(19:34):
down that stress response so that we can think more
clearly how to respond to that bear. Thank you for
some really insightful questions.

S2 (19:43):
Yeah, we really appreciate that. And thank you so much.
I want you to hold on. I want to send
you the book Stress Less. Let's go to line Five.
We've got Brittany from Illinois calling Brittany. Please go ahead.

S6 (19:55):
Hi, everybody.

S2 (19:56):
Hey.

S6 (19:57):
Um, I told the woman, um, before, um, I am like,
I'm a mom of four, my husband of one, and
I'm a dog mom of two. So I feel kind
of overstimulated at times. It's sometimes hard for me to

(20:20):
let go of controlling everything, because from the moment I
wake up, do my devotional, I pray. And then I
step out the door. I'm in motion. I'm in mommy mode.
I must accomplish everything. And then. By the midday, I'm

(20:40):
like beyond tired, overstimulated, and I react rather than respond.
And I was reading my devotional this morning, and it
was just saying how, you know, you're not supposed to
forget who you are after you are done with your
devotional time and you look in the mirror. But sometimes

(21:00):
I'm I'm wondering. I was like, maybe I don't know
how to manage that overstimulation by mid-day.

S3 (21:12):
Brittany, I want to say, first of all, moms are
going to get extra crowns in heaven.

S2 (21:17):
Amen.

S3 (21:19):
We had three preschoolers. Our youngest was diagnosed with a
brain tumor in age one, and we were perpetually seeking
treatment for her. She's doing well now. She's 36. But
I just want to affirm you as a mom. God
looks so favorably upon you and there are no pat answers.
Being a mom is one of the toughest jobs in

(21:39):
the world. It can be absolutely exhausting, but here's just
a little principle that might be helpful. Oh, by the way,
we have a dog too, so we sometimes those dogs. Actually,
science tells us a dog, you know how they love
us when we're gone. Like they can't wait for us
to come back. That actually reduces the stress response. Now

(22:00):
here's a simple little, uh, practice. Apostle Paul says in
Philippians four eight, finally, brothers, whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable,
if anything is excellent or praiseworthy. He says to think
about those things. You know, we've all read that scripture.
We believe it. But here's the key. Oftentimes we go
on with life, and we're not really thinking about what

(22:22):
we're thinking about. And there's a big word I want
to share that is a really important concept. It's called
meta cognition. Meta cognition. What it means is think about
your thinking. So Brittany, here's a little suggestion I would
have for you when you're feeling really frazzled, you know,
doing all the mommy stuff built into your routine two

(22:46):
or 3 or 4 times a day where you stop,
put it, you know, put a little reminder on your
on your phone. Or if you have a smartwatch where
you just stop and ask yourself, now, Brittany, what are
you thinking about right now? Are those thoughts prompted by
the evil one or just stress, or are they prompted
by you? When we do that, when we stop, we

(23:06):
can oftentimes catch those thoughts that can spiral into greater,
more negativity than they really were meant to be. And
here's a little application to that. Um, I don't know
if you talk to yourself, but I talk to myself.

S2 (23:21):
I talk to myself. I do.

S3 (23:23):
In private. Right.

S2 (23:25):
Most of the time.

S3 (23:27):
So, Brittany, here's a little simple way to create a
little distance between what you're feeling, those emotions and reality.
Just talk to yourself. Let me give you an example.
Next door neighbors. Kevin, let's say he made me mad.
This is not the way to do it. I am
so mad at Kevin, I could punch him out. About.
That's not the right response. Rather having a little conversation

(23:48):
with myself like this. Okay, Charles, I see you're pretty upset.
You're angry at Kevin. Let's just chill a little bit.
Let's think about what might be the next appropriate step.
That simply simple idea of talking to yourself for a
few moments actually dials down the stress response and keeps

(24:09):
that stress response from being high, which drains you and
gives you a bit more energy and clarity of thinking.
So that's that's a little simple bit of advice I
would give. And again, I affirm you as a mom.
They will grow up.

S2 (24:25):
Amen. Yes they will. Thank you so much. And we
really appreciate you calling. Hold on. We want to get
your information. We want to send you this book called
Stress Less. Hey, Charles, when it comes to stress, are
there like extremes? On one hand you say, ah, this
is everything and the sky is falling. or is there?
The denial side that, um, it's really not that bad,

(24:49):
but it really is building up to something that could
be very, very bad. Are there are the extremes? Is
there a pendulum here?

S3 (24:57):
Oh, yeah. Absolutely, absolutely. And, uh, the way, uh, we're created,
God created us. You know, we inherit our genes from
our parents. Some people, uh, have the actual equipment to
be less stressed. Some people are just more chill. I'm
a little more nervous oriented, a little more anxious oriented.

(25:18):
So I may tend to be more toward. Oh, the
sky is falling, sky is falling, and some other people
may be in the opposite direction where they need to
pay attention to the sky. But like, they're so chill.
So our personality, just our genetic makeup, can actually impact
how we respond and be happy to share when we
come back in a moment, uh, a little practice that

(25:40):
helps us do that better.

S2 (25:42):
Hey, we have Charles Stone with us today talking about
stressing less. That's the name of the book Stress Less.
I want you to be a part of what's going on.
Be a part of the conversation. Give us a call
at (877) 548-3675. That's (877) 548-3675. For those that go on air,
we've got a book for you. And I've only got five.

(26:04):
So you want to make it a point to be
a part of the program right now? Hey, I'm Roy
Patterson sitting in for Chris Brooks. This is equipped. Welcome
back to equipped. I'm Roy Patterson sitting in for Chris Brooks.
Good news, good news. Chris will be back live in

(26:26):
the studio on Monday. You have got to listen in.
It's going to be a great time I love him,
I thank God for his ministry. He's impacted so, so
many lives. So make sure you tune in on Monday
here on equipped. quipped, hey, I've got some good news
for you. We've got our impact gift. It's Pilgrim's Progress

(26:46):
in today's English. Now, Pilgrim's Progress has guided believers for
over 350 years, but many Christians haven't read it because
it was written in the 17th century English. That's why
I'm excited to offer you Pilgrim's Progress in today's English,
which makes John Bunyan's timeless story understandable without sacrificing its

(27:09):
depth and meaning. But why read it at all? Well,
because millions of Christians over the years have found it
to be a tremendous encouragement. You'll recognize your own spiritual struggles,
the weight of sin, the valley of doubt, the allure
of worldly distractions, and the joy of faithful friends. As

(27:29):
for your copy, when you donate online at Equip Radio.com
that's equipped radio.org or by calling 444144. That's (888) 644-4144. I
hope you'll do that today. You will be blessed by

(27:49):
this book. And we want to thank you again. Thank
you so much for standing with equipped with my friend
Chris Brooks. Yeah, a gift of any size will put
that book in your hand. I'm Roy Patterson. Thank you
so much for being with me. We've got Charles Stone
on the line. We're talking about stress. Everywhere you look,
there is stress, stress, stress. How do we deal with it?

(28:12):
How do we cope? And, Charles, we were talking about
that pendulum of one hand. The sky is falling. On
the other hand, it's like, oh, well, I'm not stressed.
I'm not, I don't, I don't I don't know what
you're talking about. I'm fine. How do how do we
cope when it comes to denial or catastrophizing things?

S3 (28:32):
Yeah. Yeah, that's such a great question. Well, one of
the practices that I mentioned in the book is this
Reveal how you feel. Reveal how you feel. Okay, now
the opposite of that is stuffing these difficult emotions, pretending
they're not there, trying to ignore them. Well, we have
a biblical example, a powerful biblical example of someone who

(28:55):
is very, very honest with his difficult emotions, King David.
You read the Psalms, you can't help but see how
transparent he was. He acknowledged what he was experiencing. He
acknowledged his feelings. He didn't wallow in them. Well, maybe
a couple times he did, but he got back on track.
He did. He didn't wallow in them. But it is very,
very healthy. When we experience stress and some of these emotions,

(29:19):
it could be fear, worry, anxiety, whatever it may be.
And by the way, the Apostle Paul even said he
felt some anxiety. Paul acknowledged that. So when we feel these,
it's important that we name them. We call them out.
Now the actual fancy phrase is called affect labeling. effect
is another word for emotion, so we label our emotions.

(29:41):
Now it's very interesting. Our emotions aren't pure in the
sense like I'm just angry or I'm just depressed or
I'm just fearful. It's kind of a combination of things.
And the better we get at being able to name
that emotion, simply calling it out the science really smart
scientists have found that it calms that stress response. And

(30:05):
for those who maybe have a difficult time really naming
their emotions, it's called alexithymia. It's actually it is a thing.
They can Google this word circumplex circumplex. And a bunch
of these diagrams will come up that list emotions in
kind of a circle in different quadrants that can help them. Like, okay,

(30:25):
you know, this is how I'm feeling. And sampling naming
it is a very healthy response to these difficult emotions.
It's not the sky is falling. It's not totally ignoring it.
It's somewhere in the balance where we appropriately name it,
but we don't wallow in it. Reveal how you feel.

S2 (30:44):
That's helpful. It really, really is. And I gotta I
gotta ask, does that take practice or can you just
fall into it and you got it down?

S3 (30:54):
You know, for some people and women in general have
are more in touch with their feelings, you know, somewhat
in the men's world, I, you know, a stiff upper lip.
I think a woman more easily can identify emotions. We
guys we can have a little more difficult time. So
it does take practice and even conversations with someone we trust,

(31:15):
you know, trusted friend or spouse. They sometimes can help
us describe just what I'm feeling. Mm.

S2 (31:22):
This is great information I appreciate it. Hey, we're talking
with Doctor Charles Stone and we're talking about stress. Everybody
faces it, but there are ways that we can cope. Hey,
we're going to go to the phone. We've got Judith
in Grand Rapids, Michigan calling in. Judith, please go ahead
with your question or comment.

S7 (31:42):
Yeah. Um, yeah. I deal with a lot of stress
and fear, and I've been working on it. But, you know,
it's a lot of the mental thought, too. And I'm
just curious. Um, someone mentioned to me that, um, the
key to that is not to say, um, not to
come to the Lord and say, I'm so worried or

(32:04):
not to think that you don't love the Lord enough,
but to get the mindset and to know how much
he loves you would take away the worry. And so, um,
in in other words, put in your mind on Christ.
And I don't know how physically with the brain that works.

(32:28):
But you know, that's kind of what the Bible says.
So I'm wondering if you agree with that to to
focus on how much God loves you. Loves me.

S3 (32:39):
Um, well, absolutely. Judith, I thank you so much for
for calling in. There's a little concept, uh, about the
brain is the brain is kind of prediction machine. It
wants to know what's around the corner. It wants certainty.
When we don't know what's going to happen next, we
can get more fearful. We can get more anxious. Now,

(33:00):
the reality is, we don't know what tomorrow holds. We
just just don't. But King David wrote in Psalms, he said,
those who trust in the Lord are like Mount Zion,
which cannot be moved, but abides forever. So a picture
of a mountain, and imagine the weather around that mountain.
It could be sleeting hail and snow and winds, but

(33:23):
that mountain does not become that weather. Same thing for us,
he says, when we trust in the Lord, we're like
that mountain. So all these swirling emotions, difficult emotions and
worrisome thoughts. We are not those. But our brain wants
certainty in those situations where we really are anxious and
we're we're fearful about the future. There is that one

(33:48):
certainty we can trust that is God in His Word.
God is real. He loves us. He is absolutely certain.
And we can trust his word. So your point is right.
Spot on. When we're experiencing these difficult emotions, recognizing that

(34:10):
this kind of upset because there's uncertainty, but reminding ourselves
that God is the certain one and we can trust him.

S2 (34:21):
Mm. That's good news. Judith, thank you so much for calling.
Please hold on. We've got a book we want to
send your way. It's called Stress Less by Doctor Charles Stone.
I'm Roy Patterson. Hey, we've got Louis in Bridgeview, Illinois. Louis,
please go ahead.

S8 (34:38):
Uh, yes. How are you doing? So, um, I'd really
like to get some, uh, some prayer. Um, you know,
I just feel. I feel like I get stressed out pretty,
pretty easily. Uh, I'm a father, and, uh, you know,
I'm also a husband and a deacon at the church, uh,
you know, serving. And then, you know, with work, and I've, uh,
I get like, these, just like, I think I seem

(35:00):
like to overload my plate per say, and and, uh,
you know, I do like the fact that, uh, you
said that, uh, you know, just acknowledging these things instead
of stuffing them in. I used to be a stuffer.
I used to stuff them all in. But my wife
is just so, so gracious with me and patient and, uh,
you know, uh, just over the years, I've been kind
of just letting it, you know, kind of talking to

(35:22):
her and letting some of those things out. So that
seems to work. And I do like how you said,
like the breathing techniques and that sort of stuff. But,
you know, um, yeah, I think I just seem to
overload myself sometimes. And I get like these anxieties built
up and stress built up, and to the point where
I get like a little bit of a, like a
chest pain or something, and it's just like, oh, man,

(35:44):
I need to take a deep breath. You know, I
can't I can't do it all in my own strength. And,
you know, I got, you know, talking to God in
that moment and, uh, kind of seems to be helping me, but, um,
just wanted to see if I could get some prayers.
And what are your thoughts?

S2 (35:58):
Hey, you know what? Before we answer that question, I
want you to know that we do love you. We
do care about you. We are going to pray for you.
And I'm going to have Doctor Charles Stone. He's going
to answer your question. We've got to go to a
break right now. But, Louis, please don't hang up. Please
hold on. He's going to be with you momentarily. Hey, thanks,
you guys, for listening to Equipped Radio on Monday. Chris

(36:20):
Brooks will be back with us. I'm so excited about it.
He is a brother, beloved. He's gone through some trials
concerning his daughter's health. But God is the source of
his strength and the strength of his life. By the way,
he's also the strength of your life. And this topic
today stress less. I hope it's impacting you the same

(36:41):
way it's impacting me. It's good to know that we
serve a real God, and he can serve and deal
with our real situations, our stress in these situations. So
stick around more with Doctor Charles Stone right here on equipped.
I'm Roy Patterson.

S1 (37:02):
Pilgrim's Progress by John Bunyan is one of the best
selling books of all time. It traces Bunyan's own spiritual
journey through the character of Christian. I want to send
you Pilgrim's Progress in today's English, a modern translation that
faithfully preserved Bunyan's powerful message. Follow Christian on his journey
to the Celestial City and discover timeless wisdom for your

(37:25):
own spiritual walk. Jouarre. Request your copy. When you give
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S2 (37:41):
Welcome back to equip with Chris Brooks. I'm Roy Patterson
sitting in. Thanks so much for hanging out with me today.
We've got Doctor Charles Stone with us today. We're talking
about stress. Lewis asked a tremendous question. Requested prayer. Uh, Charles,
would you mind answering the question and then uttering a
prayer for him?

S3 (38:01):
You bet. Well, Lewis, I'm going to give you a
couple of suggestions, and I want to give a short
prayer for you. First of all, to all the men listening,
we live in a world that's great pressure on men
to produce and to be so. We live in a
stressful environment. You're not alone. A couple of things I
want to say. First of all, keep sharing this. Your

(38:21):
difficult emotions with your wife sounds like that's a very
positive thing. Number two, I'd get a check up. If
you're feeling chest pain, stress actually can affect the heart.
Number three build space each week just for you. Take
some time just for you. And imagine a piggy bank
and and coins in that piggy bank. Think of these

(38:43):
coins as pleasure coins like things that you enjoy doing.
Let's say you enjoy a cup of coffee. You enjoy walking,
you know, on the path around your house, wherever you live.
Make sure you take care of you by putting a
few of those pleasure coins and your pleasure piggy bank.
I'm not talking about sinful pleasures, but things that put
deposit into your soul. So I want to take a

(39:05):
moment now to pray for you, Louis. Lord, thank you
so much for Louis courage to to share just the
stress that he feels. And, Lord, we live in a
world where the expectations upon men is just so great.
We can't. We can't meet all those expectations. I pray
for Louis that you would support him, strengthen him, bring
caring people into his life. That will be that will

(39:28):
put an arm around his shoulder to help him walk
through his stressful experiences. And we pray this in Jesus name. Amen.

S2 (39:36):
Amen. Appreciate it. Thank you so much for for praying.
And I know that prayer applies to a number of
people who are listening right now. Hey, we've had some
people call back and say, hold it. Wait a minute.
He said something about sniffing and that's going to help
me deal with my stress. Uh, can you go back
over that again?

S3 (39:55):
Absolutely. This is one of the key principles that I
talk about in the book called Seize and Breathe. The
neuroscience insight is this, you know, we have our spinal cord.
We have all these nerves that come out of it.
But there are some key nerves called nerves that come
out at the bottom of our brain. One key pair
is the vagus nerve. If vagus comes from the word vagrant,

(40:17):
what do vagrants do? They wander around. This nerve does
the same thing. It wanders around in our hollow organs,
like our heart and our lungs and our stomach. So
there's a lot of communication back and forth. And when
we activate this nerve, it actually calms our stress physiologically,
calms our stress, and we do it through what I

(40:37):
call is the sniff breath. And here's how it would work.
You know, we breathe in. We breathe out. We breathe in,
we breathe out. So when you're facing a stressful situation,
literally stop. And don't stop in the middle of freeway
if you're driving on the freeway, but literally stop and
then take a breath like this. So breathe through your
nose as far as you can, then breathe a little

(40:58):
bit more. Sniff. Hold for a couple of seconds, then
exhale slowly. So inhale, sniff a little more, then exhale.
And on that exhale make it a little longer than
the inhale. You do this three or 4 or 5 times.

(41:21):
Labs around the country that look at stress and how
to deal with it have found consistently that that in
the moment can lower your stress. Um, in fact, when
I do it before I have an interview, I find,
oh man, I'm finding myself just relaxing a little more.
So that is the sniff breath.

S2 (41:40):
It's helpful, very, very helpful. And you make it so simple.
We appreciate that. Hey, we're going to go to the
phones right now. Line four we've got Mary calling from Ohio. Mary,
please go ahead.

S9 (41:52):
Hi. Hey. Um, my husband of 62 years died in February,
and I'm learning to manage his estate. Um, he did
all of our financial business for our home and our business. So.
And I've been the caretaker of the hearts in our
family for 62 years, so I don't really know how

(42:13):
to do this. That's the stress as well as the
fact that my husband died. Um, so when I'm feeling
distressed when it pops up, I just get up, walk
away from my desk and I pray, and then I
go back to my desk and start to do some
more caretaking of the estate, and the stress pops right

(42:35):
back up again. And I just I feel very guilty.
I think is the word that I can't deal with
the stress any better than I am.

S3 (42:47):
Hmm. Well, Mary, first of all, our hearts go out
to you. Uh, losing a loved one is, you know, so, so,
so very, very difficult. And I can't, you know, words
are incomplete to convey. But our hearts do go out
for you. Um, a couple of thoughts came to mind.
Obviously managing to stay there. That is very, very stressful.

(43:11):
One thought is it might be worth spending a little
bit of money to get someone to help you with this.
I think you're on to something, though. When you say
when you are feeling stressed and you get up from
your desk and you step away from it. One suggestion
I would have is when you step away. Like, I
don't know if you were listening when I talked about

(43:33):
a pleasure piggy bank. Uh, imagine a piggy bank and
you're putting coins in it. But instead of like, money coins,
you're putting little pleasure coins every day. Think of the
things that give you pleasure. It may be that cup
of coffee, going for a walk, maybe listening to Christian music.
Make sure every day. Maybe even when you break. Let's
say you work an hour and you're working on all this,

(43:56):
you know, these numbers and things and you step away,
find that thing that gives you pleasure. I'm not talking
about sinful pleasure, but those little small things that give
you pleasure. What this does that actually increases when we
do these pleasurable things, increases some of these chemicals in
our brain that actually make us feel a little better

(44:18):
and decrease the stress response. So I'd say you're on
to something. Just add that little piece to it and,
you know, see what God does and maybe, you know,
bringing in a someone CPA, whoever that can take some
of that load off of you. Thank you so much
for for sharing that.

S2 (44:35):
Very, very helpful. Mary, I want you to hold on.
We're going to send you the book Stress Less by
Doctor Charles Stone. Doctor Stone, this has been exceptional. Um,
give us a final word. We've got about a minute.
Give us a final word.

S3 (44:48):
You bet. Two final things. First of all, is this
stress need not define you. Rather, let it refine you.
Stress need not define you. Rather, let it refine you.
God can use stressful situations in our lives to build character. Secondly,
hope every person can absolutely manage the effects of the

(45:12):
stress response by recognizing the Holy Spirit lives within you.
You have the grace of God. We have God's Word,
but we also have this inside from brain. Science that
tells us these practical steps can really help decrease the
stress response. There is hope. Stress doesn't need to define you,
let it refine you and there is hope.

S2 (45:33):
There really, really is. Doctor Charles Stone, thank you so
much for being with us. If people want to reach
out to you, how can they do it?

S3 (45:41):
Uh. My website. If they go there, little pop up
comes up, they can sign up to my blog and
they get a bunch of freebies by doing so. One
freebie is a 21 day plan to reduce stress in
your life. It's free, doesn't cost you anything. You can
get it and then unsubscribe. So Charles Stone, best way

(46:01):
to reach me through my website.

S2 (46:03):
Great information today I hope and I pray that it's
been helpful to you. I know it's been helpful to me.
We live in a stressful world, but Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father. The Bible says,
trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean
not to your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge
him and he absolutely will direct your path. I believe

(46:27):
that with all my heart. Hey, I'm Roy Patterson, I'm
sitting in for Chris Brooks. He will be live in
studio on Monday. Make it a point to tune in.
It's going to be remarkable. I really believe that. All right.
Thank you again so much for being with me. Equipped
with Chris Brooks is a production of Moody Radio under

(46:47):
the umbrella of the Moody Bible Institute. And till next
time you continue to walk in grace and peace.
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