108. Are you learning from experience?

I have a friend who will remain nameless, but it’s someone that I know in real life so don’t think I’m calling any of you ladies out.

This friend is super smart, but lost her spouse a few years ago in a horrible way and ended up a single parent with a full-time job. It was pretty awful. 

She soon met someone in real life who was recently divorced, much younger and had a young child. a very tumultuous on again off again relationship ensued.

This person was totally wrong for her, but was super attractive, could’ve passed for a model, all the things we all think we want.

But the relationship was very unhealthy with constant drama, and she ultimately saw this and ended it permanently.

I was really worried that my friend was going to Alpha widow this guy, but she didn’t. 

What she did blew my mind: she went on a dating app, met a more age appropriate guy who didn’t look like a model and they’re in a happy relationship now.

She had a very painful experience, but she learned from it and is in a better place today. 

Contrast this with me and my own dating experience, which might be more similar to yours.

I kept trying to date the elusive and attractive, alpha males. I never wanted the guys who wanted me, and the guys I wanted didn’t want me. I kept at this for years and years without trying very hard at all to change my ways. 

I thought if I just got the right manifestation techniques or the right fairy dust or bought enough lipgloss or whatever that I would finally get this kind of guy to want me, but it never happened. 

I did this for decades. 

So don’t be like me. Use the feedback you’re getting from your dating experience. Instead of going for the same 10% or so of guys on the dating apps that won’t give you the time of day, interact with the ones who are reaching out to you. 

Give them a chance. Go on dates. Don’t kill yourself that, these alpha types are ever going to want to date you. If they do, it is likely to be a brief and painful experience like it was for me and my friend. 

If you have been single for longer than a year or two and constantly disappointed this applies to you. Stop telling yourself that you can’t change your preferences. Because if you don’t learn how to do this, you will end up alone. Time is not your friend.

You can skip to the good part, just like she did. If you’re stuck on how to do this, I can help.

Go to bit.ly/ForeverMan to apply for my coaching program.

I have a great resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP.

Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN