All Episodes

August 12, 2025 28 mins

In today's episode, I chat with guest Des Mathews (they them), a Yoga Guide and Grief & Death Doula, about the intersections between yoga philosophies and grief.

Key takeaways:

  • the role of Ahimsa (non-harm, one of the 5 Yamas) in self-compassion during grief
  • surrendering to emotions with Ishvaraparidhana (divine surrender, one of the 5 Niyamas)
  • Supporting somatic healing and nervous system regulation with Asana (the movements and poses)
  • Cultural differences in grieving
  • friend-loss grief
  • how capitalism has contributed to a society that devalues friendships
  • and more!

 

QUOTES:

“…feelings might come up and it’s completely normal in our journey with grief, and with that I recommend more gentle yoga or restorative practices.”

“yoga can be used as a resource for calming our nervous system.”

“there’s no timeline for our grief, and it’s very cyclical. When we can come to that place of acceptance, it goes back to the compassion piece where we’re able to give ourselves and others more grace.”

 “Traditionally yoga was seen as a practice to end suffering and cause liberation, cause freedom.”

 “You're only allowed a certain amount of days off if your mom dies or your partner dies, but what about your best friend? Your best friend could have been your life partner,right? Society just doesn't seem to care as much about that. And again, that goes into the whole diminishing of it, which makes us feel like we're kind of gaslighting ourselves in a way. Like, did this person even exist? Because it's not recognized, people aren't showing me that it matters.”


MORE ABOUT DES:

Des is a Queer, South East Asian trauma-informed Yoga Guide and Grief and Death Doula who is a settler on Treaty 20 and the Williams Treaties in Nogojiwanong-Peterborough, Ontario. They host yoga practices, grief circles, and workshops in person and virtually. They are intentional about where they show up and lead with values of generosity, interdependence, compassion, honesty, and authenticity.


RESOURCES:

Connect with Des:

IG: @death.and.yoga

Email: des.doesyoga@gmail.com

Des’s recommendation to dive deeper into yoga: SusannaBarkataki at https://www.susannabarkataki.com/

Grief Groups:

Interested in joining a friend-loss peer support group? Fill out the interest form at ⁠⁠friendsmissingfriends.com/griefgroup⁠

Lifebooks:

Want to create a memorial book for your loved one? Get$50-off with affiliate code friendsmissingfriends, or go directly to this link. Learn more about Lifebooks at https://lifebooks.io/

 

GET IN TOUCH:

Thank you for listening to Friends Missing Friends. If you enjoyed it, please follow/subscribe, leave stars and a review—it’s so appreciated, and it helps the podcast reach more listeners!

Email: ⁠friendsmissingfriends@gmail.com⁠

Instagram: @friendsmissingfriends

Website: friendsmissingfriends.com

Spotify for Podcasts page: ⁠https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friendsmissingfriends⁠

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