May 2, 2025 • 36 mins
What happens when the career you've invested decades building suddenly feels empty? Sheila Andres faced this pivotal moment after 20 years helping grow someone else's business from a California footprint to international success. Despite external achievements, she found herself profoundly disconnected from joy, purpose, and her authentic self.
The journey Sheila shares takes us deep into the psychology of transformation, revealing how childhood wounds create adult limitations we often can't see. As a six-year-old temporarily sent to the Philippines while her parents established themselves in America, she internalized painful questions: "Am I not important enough to keep?" This seemingly small moment created a pattern of unworthiness that would influence her decisions, relationships, and professional identity for decades.
Sheila's breakthrough came not from pushing harder but from slowing down in a world obsessed with speed. "We're all running at 1000 miles an hour and we feel we have to keep pace, but don't be surprised when after years of this, you suddenly don't know how to stop," she explains. This counterintuitive wisdom—slow down to speed up—became her pathway to clarity and eventually the foundation of her coaching practice.
Through her work as a trusted advisor and progress expert, Sheila now helps entrepreneurs navigate their own transformation from "stuck" to successful. Her approach isn't about cookie-cutter strategies but helping each person "succeed their way" by confronting the specific barriers holding them back. The most powerful moments often come when she reflects back to clients what they cannot see themselves, creating clarity where there were only streaks in the mirror.
Whether you're considering entrepreneurship, feeling stuck in your current business, or simply seeking more authenticity in your work, Sheila's story offers powerful reminders about the courage it takes to remove the blinders and see yourself clearly. Connect with Sheila and download her free guide at realize-yourvision.com/rollercoaster to begin your own journey from wounds to wisdom.
Connect with Barbie Moreno
BarbieMoreno.com/course
949-541-7582
@barbieresiliencecoach
Connect with Sheila Andres
📞 Phone: 909-395-6867
📧 Email: sheila@realize-yourvision.com
🌐 Website: www.realize-yourvision.com
Season 2
Unraveling the Mind: From Mental Struggles to Inner Strength.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the From Wounds to Wisdom podcast with
your host, Barbie Moreno, wherewe dive into people's past and
discover what wounds theyincurred and how they
transformed those wounds intowisdom to help themselves and
others.
Welcome to the From Wounds toWisdom podcast.
(00:27):
I am your host, Barbie Moreno.
My guest today is Sheila Andres.
She's a trusted advisor,progress expert, speaker and
author with years of hands-onexperience helping build a
business from the ground up.
She knows firsthand thechallenges entrepreneurs face
and now, as the owner of Realizeyour Vision and the founder of
Stuck Sucks Movement, she's on amission to help small business
(00:49):
owners turn their vision intoreality.
Sheila believes there's powerin small and she's here to share
her wisdom with us today.
Welcome, Ms Sheila.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Yay, I'm so excited to be here, Barbie.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Thank you, thank you.
I love all of the work thatyou're currently doing.
I think that you're amazingfrom all the conversations that
we've had, and I want to getinto how you got there and then
we can talk about you doing,because we know that this is
from Wounds to Wisdom.
So we all have a story and wewould just absolutely love to
hear yours, so can you sharewith us your journey?
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Thank you, um, when you showed up and said this is
your podcast, like I said, therewas this fire in my heart.
That was almost like a hell.
Yeah, you have to do it.
I knew it was going to be adeeper dive, but I think it's
important to have these kinds ofconversations and sharing with
the world, because we all, Ibelieve, have a purpose.
We're all meant to do greatthings, and when we respond to
(01:45):
that deeper calling, becausemaybe we're not completely
aligned for what we're supposedto do, it gets really scary.
And I think that's where Ifound myself at.
Very briefly, right out ofcollege, I decided to work for a
small business owner ratherthan a big corporation ready to
hire me.
I gave them 20 years of my life, but I probably should have
(02:09):
left a lot sooner.
And, long story short, itallowed me to experience all
kinds of things that wasnecessary and important to
create a business, from startupto the point of success, however
you define that.
In this case, it was movingfrom a footprint in California
to nationwide open officesinternationally.
(02:30):
But what I would have to say is, in the beginning, I was really
passionate.
It was exciting, I feltvaluable, I felt like there was
a determination and when I wouldput in and contribute to
achieving the goals.
I felt appreciated, you know,and it fueled my aspirations.
(02:53):
But somewhere along the line Idon't know, I think
determination, aspirationsomehow turned into expectation
and demand.
Things got really hard and Ithink because time is short, I'm
just going to hit it.
I woke up one day feeling like Iam not loving what I'm doing.
(03:18):
I felt completely lost and Ithink, deeper, deep down inside,
on a deeper, deeper level, Ijust I didn't know who I was and
I I lost my joy.
I just felt like there's got tobe something more in life.
Where was the Sheila that wasso excited about life?
(03:41):
Where did she go to and how didI lose myself in that and
without knowing I couldn'texplain it.
I just well I know now I wasn'thappy with who I was with
myself, like personally, who youwere, like in your yes.
Yes, there's moments when theday was great and I'm sitting
(04:01):
there and I might, I just didn'tfeel good about about anything.
But I realized I wasn't feelinggood about who I was and who I
was being so bottom line.
It just got to a point whereI'm like I can't continue my
life this way.
I want to be happy, I want tobe joyful.
I'm married, I have twodaughters I don't feel like I'm
present with them and, moreimportantly, I want to
(04:24):
understand more deeply what itis that I lost.
You know, what is it that'sreally getting in the way of my
joy?
Why am I not happy?
And I knew might've beensomething with me, but I was in
uncharted territory, you know.
So I left the company andstarted down this, this pathway.
(04:46):
I never thought I'd be anentrepreneur, but the signs were
there my whole entire careerand life.
People would show up and saySheila, why don't you start your
own business?
You're so good at this?
I'm thinking if I would have,if that was meant for me, I
would have done it already.
I'm better as a trusted righthand.
But there's so much truth inthat.
So there's a part of me that Irealize and recognize that I'm
(05:06):
good at.
And that's where, when Ibranched off, I wanted to know
what were those things so I canembrace it and really lean into
that value, that sense ofworthiness, and share that
because it brought me joy.
But I also want to know whatwere the other poo-poo stuff,
you know, the stuff that maybewas pleasant and I had no idea
(05:31):
what I was stepping into,because, unfortunately, in the
two decades I, you know,invested my life in this company
, there was no reinvestment inme, in my own personal
self-development.
There's no reinvestment in me,in my own personal
self-development, and that was aspace where, when I decided to
start my own business, it openedup the path where I had to
(05:53):
learn more about who I was, hardtruths, the good stuff and all
the bad.
And I think that's the placethat really, really moves the
needle for everyone you know,especially in the place of
(06:13):
business, because it's aboutshowing up.
I think that if you were calledto be an entrepreneur, you need
to embrace everything about youwith confidence, the good and
the bad, so you could show upwithout hesitation.
Yeah, and there's somethingabout aligning with your truth
that brings out authenticity.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
That's really what I wanted to say and also like when
you started 20 years ago, youwere a different person.
Oh, yeah, right, or more than20 years, but the 20 years that
you started like when you're adifferent person, so maybe it
fulfilled that part of you backthen.
But, like you said, we have tolearn to leave when it's no
longer fulfilling us.
But that's hard right.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
It is, and you know what's hard about it is because
we don't know.
Yeah, we don't know what wedon't know.
I tell so many people that,like I'm not, can I trademark
that we don't?
You don't know what you don'tknow.
We don't know what we don'tknow, yeah.
But there's a strong feelingthat I think if you really lean
into your own gut, intuition andsenses, you know it can't lead
(07:09):
you.
It can't lead you the wrong wayif you're being honest with
yourself.
And that's where I found myselfstepping into a place of
complete honesty about what isit that you want, sheila, what
is it that's not making youhappy and what might be getting
in the way of your joy andsuccess.
Speaker 1 (07:29):
Well, and leaning into that, the I think that,
like from what I've experiencedwith talking with people, is
they want to do things, butthere's some part of them that
doesn't feel either worthy, orthat they don't feel like
they're enough, or somebody toldthem that they, you know they
would never succeed, and so theyrely on these stories about
(07:51):
themselves to keep themselvessmall.
So what have you experiencedwith that?
What do you teach people whenthat's the story they're telling
themselves?
Speaker 2 (07:59):
I was just like stop talking about me, barbie, right,
I'm talking about me, barbie?
Speaker 1 (08:03):
right, I'm talking about me too, don't worry.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
But that's exactly the crazy thing about it, like,
like you're so unique, barbie,there's no one else like you in
the whole wide world.
There's no one like me, there'sno one like anyone else.
But the thing here is whatholds us, I think, in similar or
connected in some way, is thatour journey opens up to address
everything that you just saidyeah there's something in our
(08:28):
life and the beliefs andexperiences we went through that
have dimmed our light, and wedidn't know it right you know
that have made us small, uh,second guesses.
There's voices in our head thatI didn't even realize how
abusive and nasty my negativeNelly was until I took a moment
(08:49):
to really sit there and say if Iwant something different than I
need to start opening my eyesand ears to the things that I'm
not seeing or hearing.
And, um, you know, right therethat sense of unworthiness.
You know you go down your path.
Who knows how it's going toopen up for you.
That's what's beautiful aboutit.
(09:10):
It's like your journey is sounique to you.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
It's also scary.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Oh, it's so scary, yeah.
But when we desire for it andwe find that courage to just
show up, get into a space wheremaybe truths will be made known,
the learning becomes.
You know the growth.
That's the part that scares you.
But you don't even know whatyou don't know, so you stepped
(09:34):
into it.
You may not even realize it,but when it hits you, that's
where it's hard.
And one of the things I wantedto say was that feeling of
unworthiness.
You know, I workedpredominantly in an industry of
men.
This whole journey allowed meto see, oh my God, my ego.
I didn't even need her until,um, oh my, so I'm going to get
(10:00):
really real here.
After I turned 50, you know, um, and the sense of unworthiness.
Even when I was smaller, Iremember when I started to
listen.
I would remember my mom sayinglike, when people would
compliment you oh you look nicetoday, or you did well I had a
(10:20):
hard time receiving the thankyou or affirmation which is
grace to say thank you in return.
You know like oh, you look nicetoday, thank you so much, or
you did really well, thank you.
I would somehow try to dismissit or be like no, it's not a big
thing or anything like that Icouldn't receive and I didn't
(10:40):
understand what that was allabout.
And really hard.
Truth too is, you know, youknow ego.
It's the need to control, lookgood and be right Right.
Well, it took me years to evenknow what that looked like, what
that felt like, how it showedup for the aha moment to hit.
(11:03):
And so, you know, we staysteadfast and committed to
saying I know there's got to bemore.
I want to be free, I want tofeel good about myself, I know I
have value and I want to fullyembrace it and I want to share
it with the world.
Well, these are the things thatkind of end up holding us back,
but if we stay committed to go,I want to overcome that.
(11:23):
You'll see that there's littlethings in life.
I always say I think you getwhat you need when you need it.
Some will be a bigger aha andin some cases it might be little
things.
That starts to open up your,your perspective on things,
right, so that when the nextteaching or lesson comes, you've
(11:44):
been positioned to be able toreceive it and learn even more.
So I feel like my journey hasbeen these little moments either
a conversation coming into aworkshop or whatnot.
That just little by littlestarted to people say peel back
the onions or, in my case, pulloff the blinders.
Little by little, right.
So one day it made sense betweenconnecting what I heard in my
(12:08):
head to how I felt in my heart,to the experiences and memories
I remember, to recognizing thistruth of you know, unworthiness,
and what does that really mean.
And then, when it all cametogether, it's like your mind is
completely blown and your heartwants to just explode.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
And it's a journey.
I think that a lot of peoplewant things immediately.
In my course, from wounds towisdom, I teach people that it
takes a long time to retrainyourself, but once you do, then
those habits become normal.
It was like I was.
It sounds silly, but I wasearlier looking at my dishwasher
and I was like I'm so gratefulI have a dishwasher, you know,
(12:49):
and that just sounds dumb, butlike just to be grateful for
that is a trained habit to lookfor things to be grateful for.
And it's the same thing withwhat you're talking about.
These are trained habits.
This is not something that youjust wake up the next day and go
I'm going to be successful, I'mgoing to quit my job and I'm
going to do X, Y, Z.
You have to train yourselfthese ways.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
It's so true and you know I'm going to do a really
transparent confession.
Yeah, you know I'm a coach andit's like one of those things
where you're trying to shareyour gifts with the world where
people say, well, you need to,you know, put that gift and
something that people candownload.
And I thought, well, everyone'sdoing that.
I don't want to do it.
But I realized that it's soimportant to be able to share
(13:31):
even these few little nuggetsfor those where it resonates,
because I want to touch and helppeople look at their journey,
not not just in business,because if you're an
entrepreneur, you're not puttinglife in the business.
Business is part of your life,right?
So when you're looking at it,how can you navigate the journey
of life?
Because it's a constant rollercoaster.
(13:52):
It's up and down.
When you think you haveeverything figured out,
something else throws acurveball, and I think that
that's what makes it quote hard.
You know we want to kick thenegative words in there, but if
you're also wanting to reallychange, and so I brand as a
trusted advisor and a progressexpert, but I'm business coach
and consultant, but the progressexpert lands because it's
(14:15):
saying, if you are open to behonest and to really receive
that can accelerate yourprogress in the evolution and
transformation of who you needto become to achieve the success
you desire.
And learning and understandingwhat you got into almost
positioned you to not look atthe you know, just the outer
(14:39):
shell of this journey movingforward to success.
It's really saying you got toknow that changes involve.
What does it mean right?
And to be able to reflect onthat to help navigate the
resistant.
You know, because, like you said, it's scary, it's hard, we
don't know what.
We don't know what we'regetting into.
And sometimes you can only movewith that desire.
(15:03):
I just want to be better, Iwant to feel better, I want to
find joy, I want to bedetermined Like what does that
really look and feel like?
And you need all those thingsto really face the hard truth
and to overcome and to moveforward to that place of that
authentic self you know,alignment with who you truly are
(15:25):
, so that you could just show upfully.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Was there a specific either time like a, like, a
turning point in your life?
Were you like this is, I can'tdo the other one anymore, and
then what was that?
Or, if you don't want to talkabout that, was there like a
specific teacher that?
Speaker 2 (15:47):
you gravitated towards, that helped you come to
this realization.
You know, I think that it firststarted the calling, that
desire for something differentin my life I would say would be
the catalyst.
And when I look back, you know,with the decisions I kind of
made, whether they were good ornot, like I mean, I've invested
(16:12):
in programs and they didn'treally reap what I had hoped to
get out of it Right.
But the truth was, in steppinginto that, there were lessons
learned about what not to do andthings about myself that I
didn't expect going through it.
So when I look back, I can'treally, you know, regret or
pinpoint a person, but I feellike, because I was so
(16:33):
determined to really feel goodabout myself, yeah, to love what
I'm doing, to love on people.
I mean, that was the first,hardest question I had to ask
what do you want, sheila?
And the word love, and Ithought, what does that have to
do with business?
But it's everything I want tolove, what I'm doing, I'm going
to love on people.
(16:54):
I want to, you know, pour outthese gifts in love and I just
find when you come from thatplace it moves mountains and I
feel like one defining pointthere were so many, because
there's a lot of blocks andthings that get in our way.
But one thing though that senseof worthiness.
It's huge.
I don't know.
I think we do overcome, but aswe start to grow and evolve and
(17:16):
become more empowered, you know,we become stronger.
But we're dealing with a wholenother level of a sense of
unworthiness and how to face itand overcome that.
But the biggest thing for me wasgoing.
Well, if I'm going to go outand share my gifts with the
world, what value do I reallyhave?
You know?
And when I look back, I've doneso many things that I didn't
(17:38):
allow myself to receive andacknowledge, and they were so
important.
I mean, I had my own coach tellme Sheila, you're like, you're
like every CEO's dream.
If they could have you there bytheir side, because it's it's
the truth is like, if they'reeverywhere and creative, I can
(18:00):
help them get grounded and focusso that they can get traction.
If they have all these ideasand know what to do, but they're
not moving on it, I can ignitepassion.
I could do sales and marketing,but I could also do more
operational things.
So, as a business owner, theydeal with everything.
They're also unique in who theyare, so I can compliment them
(18:21):
very well.
But I couldn't receive that, andso I had to dive deep to go.
What in the world was thatabout?
And there was one I can'tremember what it was, but they
were saying think about athought that you had when you're
addressing this thing.
It may not have beenunworthiness, but what surprised
me was don't ignore what comesto your head, because, even if
(18:42):
it doesn't look related, itprobably is.
And the image that it keptcoming back to was when I was a
really little girl I feel like Iwas about six and my parents
they were, you know, firstgeneration to come and establish
themselves in the US.
Well, they needed help.
It was just my mom and dad, andthey needed help.
(19:03):
So there was me.
I have a younger sister, andthey decided to send us back to
the Philippines for one year sothat they can get settled and
then have us back.
And I remember so vividly.
I was so young but I could notvocalize what I'm about to share
, but I can still hear it tillthis day.
(19:24):
And what was running on my headwas you know, why do you have
to send me away?
Don't you love me?
Am I not important enough?
Why can't I be important enough?
Why can't you love me enough tostay?
And you're six?
How do you say these things?
You probably throw a tantrum ordo that, but I remember staying
(19:47):
silent because I didn't knowhow to process the thoughts and
the feelings that I had, letalone voice it.
The other thing that came to mewas saying no, you're a good
girl, shaylin.
Good girls need to obey, theyneed to listen to their parents.
So if they know Beth and theyneed to send us away, then trust
that.
(20:08):
But I felt like I wasn'timportant enough, I wasn't loved
enough and therefore couldeasily be sent away.
Well, I had no idea I had heldon to that for so long and
bottom line is, when that thattruth surfaced, I started to see
how it kind of permeated andreally spread through other
(20:31):
areas and aspects of my life.
That place where how can I healthat so that it can change?
You know the way I think, how Ifeel, what I do and all these
other areas, and I already knewthat there was a sense of
freedom from that.
You know, to feel that sense ofworthiness and to let go of
(20:59):
that negative and belief in thatlie, yeah, you know.
But to accept it that it is alie, it took me like two minutes
to be like so these are thestories you're talking about?
Like people are like, what arethe stories you're telling
yourself?
I'm like, once upon a time, Idon't know, you know it took a
process and enough exposure tothe place of personal
development and transformationto even understand that language
(21:22):
, to even connect with it to andthen connect it to.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
That's what the story means you know, and that's how
it's been showing up in my lifeall this time.
Yeah, yeah.
What are your tools?
Do you have daily rituals,practices like how do you keep
yourself in a positive space?
Speaker 2 (21:42):
um, you know it's crazy because every time I got
to a quiet place when things gotso hard, even at work, they
kept throwing me things.
Um, at the corporate job I wasin, they kept throwing me things
that I had never done before,actually the company never done
before.
And I want to preface that bysaying that at an early age in
(22:07):
my career the owner gave me partof the company and I took that
to mean that I have aresponsibility to ensure that
this company succeeds.
So when there were problems,ensure that this company succeed
.
So when there were problems,that belief of that ownership I
didn't own most, you know,majority of the company, but
that portion of it felt I wasgrateful for it, right.
(22:31):
But I turned it into this liketyrant kind of thing and didn't
realize it thing like, well, Iam part of the company, like
it's part of my responsibilityto help save it or put the bird,
the building that's on fire andput it out.
So, nurturing this, you knowsavior syndrome, you know
(22:52):
putting it all on myself andrealizing no, it's, it's not my
responsibility, I can onlycontribute, you know.
So when things got so hard, youknow I realized when I got to a
place of pretty much despair.
Yeah, I couldn't.
Everything that I could dowasn't working.
(23:12):
I just I was just at a placewhere I was hitting the wall.
So it really were moments ofdespair because I didn't know
anything else to do.
And I'm only working within myown experience, within my own
limits of knowledge in thisspace I'm dealing with I've
never done before.
It requires new experiences andknowledge.
(23:33):
So when I would get quiet andface that feelings of despair, I
found I don't know clarity, Ifound answers, I found next
steps.
So I feel like I never actuallyacknowledged that.
It was almost like this innatesubconscious thing that I would
(23:54):
do everything every time thingsgot really hard and it always
worked for me, but it was was Ididn't know what, I didn't know,
right, you know.
But now that I was on a path toreally become more mindful and
aware, I realized the value ofit and what is it so?
I want to touch on that becausewhat I would tell people is this
we live in a world where it'sjust getting faster by the
(24:19):
minute.
Before I'm like I'm running ahundred miles an hour.
Now it's 500 miles an hour.
Now I feel like it's a thousandmiles an hour and we feel like
we have to get into this, this,the speed of moving, because
this is the world requires.
But what happens here is, if wekeep nurturing that, if we keep
reinforcing that kind ofbehavior, don't be surprised
(24:43):
that after some time ofconstantly doing this in years
past, you suddenly don't knowhow to stop Right.
And I want to help people inthat space, to support you, to
learn how to stop so you couldspeed up, slow down, so you
could speed up.
It goes against the grain ofthe world, but I'm telling you
(25:03):
there is such beauty, peace, joy, progress that can be gained
when you can get comfortablewith, even if there's a time
pressure, like I don't have timeto even stop.
Can you get to a place whereyou're like I'm so valuable and
I know that I can serve myselfand others more if I could just
(25:25):
stop for just a moment right,you know, clear the mind and
allow the things to come intothe space?
Or just, can I just calm down,get quiet so I can think?
Speaker 1 (25:38):
clearly so.
Do you practice that daily, oris this something that you do as
it needs, as it comes up?
Speaker 2 (25:45):
I feel like I'm doing it all the time, but absolutely
and I think that's the beautyof it, because I want to also
share the fact that you know Ican come in and share tools or
advice, but the truth is likeBarbie share tools or advice,
but the truth is like Barbie.
You're Barbie, I can never beBarbie.
I'm Sheila, you can never beSheila.
And even my motto, when it cameto me, like what would be your
(26:08):
tagline, what's your brandpromise if people work with you?
And I'm like succeed your way,yeah.
So I want to share what you'regoing through, what you're
dealing with, and open up thatperspective so that it can
create some, you know, pull upsome of the blinders so you
could see things more clearly.
Then I want to help you in thatclarity to make a decision for
(26:28):
yourself.
What does it look like to stopand slow down for a minute?
And it's like really embracingand supporting them from a love
of true love and support forthem to figure that out on their
own.
Because telling somebody whatto do it might help, but we
(26:49):
can't control anything right, wecan only contribute.
So if we make suggestions andwhatnot, what really moves a
needle is that they stay open,receive it and really do the
work to go.
Oh my God, I know what thatlooks like, but I don't want to
do it and this is why.
So it makes them go deeper andstarts them to think about what
(27:11):
is forcing certain behaviors,the way they think and what they
feel, to do it.
But when they slowly start todo that, they chip away at the
things that might haveimprisoned them.
Right, you know, and really nomatter how you slice it, there's
some form of freedom that youfind each time you outgrow or
break free from everything thathas kept you small.
Speaker 1 (27:34):
Yeah, I love that.
It sounds like our work is veryaligned with each other, and so
your main audience, or thepeople that you work with most,
are entrepreneurs.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
yes, yeah, and I think it just created that way
because, when I look back, therewas a reason why I worked for
the small business owner ratherthan the big company.
Yeah, and as much as I've doneeverything from operations,
customer service, sales andmarketing, I think my biggest
thing was being that trustedadvisor to the business owner
(28:06):
who was a visionary and that's aleadership role to feel good
about what those next steps are.
Um, to be part of a team, youknow, and recognizing that in
order to achieve a goal, youknow it's more than just one man
(28:27):
or one woman.
You know it really involves thetalent and expertise of so many
different people and that's why, uh, so I'm taking that
experience to really bring itinto a place where I could use
all that as value right in theplace of business.
And, believe me, we all startout wanting to start a business
and we're by ourselves, we don'teven know that we're being a
(28:50):
lone wolf, and that is probablyone of the like the biggest
poison you can have to yoursuccess.
So, but before they can evenrecognize that, they have to be
willing to face some truth.
Like I could do this on my own.
The truth is, you can't.
Everybody needs some help.
Yep, yeah.
And then it's like what can youdo and where are the parts that
you're really struggling with?
(29:12):
Right, but it's not even justknowing that it's now
understanding.
Oh, my god, this is the process.
This is me growing and evolving.
I've got to learn and bewilling to invest in myself and
to receive the knowledge and thethings that other people are
good at, so that I can grow andthen let that overflow to other
(29:34):
people that I pull into mybusiness to help meet their
vision.
You know.
Speaker 1 (29:39):
I have found, though, that for that to happen, you
have to truly believe inyourself, and that's one of the
hardest things for people,because that's why small
businesses fail.
People start them with the ideathat I could do this better, or
I could do x, y, z, blah, blah,blah.
But you have to invest inyourself, and you have to be
willing to invest in yourself intimes when you may not have the
(30:00):
money to invest in yourself.
And?
But you have to invest inyourself and you have to be
willing to invest in yourself intimes when you may not have the
money to invest in yourself.
And then you have to say I'mstill worthy of investing in
myself and moving forward, andthat is a hard, hard road If you
haven't done the inner work.
Speaker 2 (30:12):
It's so true, and here's the thing.
So I'm going to say this peoplemight throw, I don't know
vegetables at me, their salad,it doesn't matter.
But here's the truth throw, Idon't know vegetables at me,
their salad, it doesn't matter.
But here's the truth.
Somebody told me one timeSheila, nobody pays for clarity,
nobody pays for confidence.
You know, but I'm sitting hereand going um, and you just said
(30:36):
it, nobody pays forencouragement or belief.
Right, but the truth is, yeah,we all need someone to believe
in ourselves, and I used to hidefrom that because I thought
there's no, that's not a sixfigure, I can't quantify that.
But the truth is, all thesethings are priceless.
Did you know my whole life,barbie and other people I would.
I would phrase it this waythey're like she.
(30:57):
We have so much energy.
Do you know why people want towork with you?
Because I want to be in thatenergy.
And I thought I never saw thatas valuable and and I'm about to
say this because I'm standingin my worth and my truth, not
from a place of arrogance, butfrom a place of worthiness Yep,
I've got amazing energy.
(31:17):
I'm equivalent to 10 people.
I think I'm the best cheersquad ever, so when you need it,
I'll give you that loving bootysink.
You know what I mean and almostalso share like to believe in
you, right, but not just to belike.
You got this it's almost inorder for you to understand how
(31:39):
much I believe in you.
I reflect back to you yourtruth about who you are and
where you're at at this momentand all the stuff you may have.
Come into the call with, sittingin a bed of poo poo and you're
like, feel like the world is onyour shoulders and there's no
hope.
But when we're done, you'relike I can't do this.
(32:00):
But when we're done, you startto see not only and we're
reminded of your amazingstrength and gifts, but also
seeing the good and all the crapthat you might be sitting in
and how, in that moment, thesethings are serving you.
So I talk in more generality,right, because I'm very
(32:21):
customized, high touch andspecific to you.
This is really where the valueand the power comes, because I
sit there and I'm reallyintentional about being present,
about seeing you, about hearingyou, about getting to know you
and when, all the stuff that youshare, I process, all of it and
then I reflect back vocally sothat you can then receive and
(32:44):
like mirror back.
You know and, and I don't knowwhy Well, I do know why, but
when we look at our own mirror,it's all blurry.
Right, we've been squirted withour own Windex, scrub it down
and there's still streaks.
We don't see ourselves clearly,right.
But when you're in a placewhere you feel like I can trust
them, I feel safe.
(33:05):
Right, I respect her, she won'tlie to me, and I'm sharing now
and reflecting back a very clearreflection of you and what's
happening.
It changes everything, you know, and that's what I can't
quantify.
But the bottom line is that ifyou sat there for months or
years like spinning and notmoving and get being able to
(33:28):
overcome what's getting in yourright, but one conversation
suddenly inspires you and youstart taking action and doing
things you've never done before,how much is that worth to you?
I could never quantify how muchtime you just saved, or maybe
you could go back to that.
I could have saved two years.
That's one thing.
But now, as you start to moveforward, how can you sit there
(33:50):
and be very mindful that I'minvesting in myself?
My time is valuable.
I'm stuck and I don't want towaste it stuck Right.
I want to, I want to, I want to.
I want somebody that I don'twant to waste it stuck right.
I want to, I want to, I want to.
I want somebody that I cantrust to sit there and give it
to me straight so I can keepmoving, because the more that
you progress and the sooner themore impact that you make, the
(34:10):
happier you are, you know?
Um, that doesn't mean it's notgoing to be easy, right?
Speaker 1 (34:15):
right, right, you know nothing that is worth.
It is ever without its own upsand downs, right, we go through
that in general.
How does one um, because we dohave to wrap up how does one get
in contact with you, shouldthey feel like you might be
advantageous to their journey?
Speaker 2 (34:32):
um, yeah, absolutely my website.
Realize, dash, your visioncom.
That's R E A L I Z E dash Y O UR V I S I O N dot I O N dot com
.
There is a place there whereyou could schedule some time
with me and I don't want tosound cavalier or faux pas, but
(34:54):
you're going to step into myplayground and we're going to
have fun, fun with your journey.
The other thing here is I didrecently create this little tip
guide.
It's very simple, it's justthree things.
But if you looked at it fromits, you know, outer shell or
icing, you know you probablywon't get as much out of it.
(35:16):
But if you sat there and reallylooked at those three things,
it's going to force you toreflect deeper to understand
this journey that you're on andwhen you think about it and
reflect back, it's really goingto force you to commit, it's
going to force you to understandwhat change means and stuff
like that.
So if it's something of valueto you, then it's yours, you
(35:38):
know, and it's that realize yourvisioncom forward.
Slash roller coaster.
Speaker 1 (35:45):
Love all of your things for sure.
Oh, thank you, stuck, sucks,those kinds of those kinds of
thought, because they're realand they're true.
So I'm sure anybody who workswith you, like you said, you're
probably a beautiful mirror forthem and we appreciate you
coming on the show and sharingyour vision, your vision, your
expertise and your journey.
Thank you so much.
Welcome to the From Wounds to Wisdom podcast with
your host, Barbie Moreno, wherewe dive into people's past and
discover what wounds theyincurred and how they
transformed those wounds intowisdom to help themselves and
others.
Welcome to the From Wounds toWisdom podcast.
(00:27):
I am your host, Barbie Moreno.
My guest today is Sheila Andres.
She's a trusted advisor,progress expert, speaker and
author with years of hands-onexperience helping build a
business from the ground up.
She knows firsthand thechallenges entrepreneurs face
and now, as the owner of Realizeyour Vision and the founder of
Stuck Sucks Movement, she's on amission to help small business
(00:49):
owners turn their vision intoreality.
Sheila believes there's powerin small and she's here to share
her wisdom with us today.
Welcome, Ms Sheila.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Yay, I'm so excited to be here, Barbie.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Thank you, thank you.
I love all of the work thatyou're currently doing.
I think that you're amazingfrom all the conversations that
we've had, and I want to getinto how you got there and then
we can talk about you doing,because we know that this is
from Wounds to Wisdom.
So we all have a story and wewould just absolutely love to
hear yours, so can you sharewith us your journey?
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Thank you, um, when you showed up and said this is
your podcast, like I said, therewas this fire in my heart.
That was almost like a hell.
Yeah, you have to do it.
I knew it was going to be adeeper dive, but I think it's
important to have these kinds ofconversations and sharing with
the world, because we all, Ibelieve, have a purpose.
We're all meant to do greatthings, and when we respond to
(01:45):
that deeper calling, becausemaybe we're not completely
aligned for what we're supposedto do, it gets really scary.
And I think that's where Ifound myself at.
Very briefly, right out ofcollege, I decided to work for a
small business owner ratherthan a big corporation ready to
hire me.
I gave them 20 years of my life, but I probably should have
(02:09):
left a lot sooner.
And, long story short, itallowed me to experience all
kinds of things that wasnecessary and important to
create a business, from startupto the point of success, however
you define that.
In this case, it was movingfrom a footprint in California
to nationwide open officesinternationally.
(02:30):
But what I would have to say is, in the beginning, I was really
passionate.
It was exciting, I feltvaluable, I felt like there was
a determination and when I wouldput in and contribute to
achieving the goals.
I felt appreciated, you know,and it fueled my aspirations.
(02:53):
But somewhere along the line Idon't know, I think
determination, aspirationsomehow turned into expectation
and demand.
Things got really hard and Ithink because time is short, I'm
just going to hit it.
I woke up one day feeling like Iam not loving what I'm doing.
(03:18):
I felt completely lost and Ithink, deeper, deep down inside,
on a deeper, deeper level, Ijust I didn't know who I was and
I I lost my joy.
I just felt like there's got tobe something more in life.
Where was the Sheila that wasso excited about life?
(03:41):
Where did she go to and how didI lose myself in that and
without knowing I couldn'texplain it.
I just well I know now I wasn'thappy with who I was with
myself, like personally, who youwere, like in your yes.
Yes, there's moments when theday was great and I'm sitting
(04:01):
there and I might, I just didn'tfeel good about about anything.
But I realized I wasn't feelinggood about who I was and who I
was being so bottom line.
It just got to a point whereI'm like I can't continue my
life this way.
I want to be happy, I want tobe joyful.
I'm married, I have twodaughters I don't feel like I'm
present with them and, moreimportantly, I want to
(04:24):
understand more deeply what itis that I lost.
You know, what is it that'sreally getting in the way of my
joy?
Why am I not happy?
And I knew might've beensomething with me, but I was in
uncharted territory, you know.
So I left the company andstarted down this, this pathway.
(04:46):
I never thought I'd be anentrepreneur, but the signs were
there my whole entire careerand life.
People would show up and saySheila, why don't you start your
own business?
You're so good at this?
I'm thinking if I would have,if that was meant for me, I
would have done it already.
I'm better as a trusted righthand.
But there's so much truth inthat.
So there's a part of me that Irealize and recognize that I'm
(05:06):
good at.
And that's where, when Ibranched off, I wanted to know
what were those things so I canembrace it and really lean into
that value, that sense ofworthiness, and share that
because it brought me joy.
But I also want to know whatwere the other poo-poo stuff,
you know, the stuff that maybewas pleasant and I had no idea
(05:31):
what I was stepping into,because, unfortunately, in the
two decades I, you know,invested my life in this company
, there was no reinvestment inme, in my own personal
self-development.
There's no reinvestment in me,in my own personal
self-development, and that was aspace where, when I decided to
start my own business, it openedup the path where I had to
(05:53):
learn more about who I was, hardtruths, the good stuff and all
the bad.
And I think that's the placethat really, really moves the
needle for everyone you know,especially in the place of
(06:13):
business, because it's aboutshowing up.
I think that if you were calledto be an entrepreneur, you need
to embrace everything about youwith confidence, the good and
the bad, so you could show upwithout hesitation.
Yeah, and there's somethingabout aligning with your truth
that brings out authenticity.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
That's really what I wanted to say and also like when
you started 20 years ago, youwere a different person.
Oh, yeah, right, or more than20 years, but the 20 years that
you started like when you're adifferent person, so maybe it
fulfilled that part of you backthen.
But, like you said, we have tolearn to leave when it's no
longer fulfilling us.
But that's hard right.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
It is, and you know what's hard about it is because
we don't know.
Yeah, we don't know what wedon't know.
I tell so many people that,like I'm not, can I trademark
that we don't?
You don't know what you don'tknow.
We don't know what we don'tknow, yeah.
But there's a strong feelingthat I think if you really lean
into your own gut, intuition andsenses, you know it can't lead
(07:09):
you.
It can't lead you the wrong wayif you're being honest with
yourself.
And that's where I found myselfstepping into a place of
complete honesty about what isit that you want, sheila, what
is it that's not making youhappy and what might be getting
in the way of your joy andsuccess.
Speaker 1 (07:29):
Well, and leaning into that, the I think that,
like from what I've experiencedwith talking with people, is
they want to do things, butthere's some part of them that
doesn't feel either worthy, orthat they don't feel like
they're enough, or somebody toldthem that they, you know they
would never succeed, and so theyrely on these stories about
(07:51):
themselves to keep themselvessmall.
So what have you experiencedwith that?
What do you teach people whenthat's the story they're telling
themselves?
Speaker 2 (07:59):
I was just like stop talking about me, barbie, right,
I'm talking about me, barbie?
Speaker 1 (08:03):
right, I'm talking about me too, don't worry.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
But that's exactly the crazy thing about it, like,
like you're so unique, barbie,there's no one else like you in
the whole wide world.
There's no one like me, there'sno one like anyone else.
But the thing here is whatholds us, I think, in similar or
connected in some way, is thatour journey opens up to address
everything that you just saidyeah there's something in our
(08:28):
life and the beliefs andexperiences we went through that
have dimmed our light, and wedidn't know it right you know
that have made us small, uh,second guesses.
There's voices in our head thatI didn't even realize how
abusive and nasty my negativeNelly was until I took a moment
(08:49):
to really sit there and say if Iwant something different than I
need to start opening my eyesand ears to the things that I'm
not seeing or hearing.
And, um, you know, right therethat sense of unworthiness.
You know you go down your path.
Who knows how it's going toopen up for you.
That's what's beautiful aboutit.
(09:10):
It's like your journey is sounique to you.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
It's also scary.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Oh, it's so scary, yeah.
But when we desire for it andwe find that courage to just
show up, get into a space wheremaybe truths will be made known,
the learning becomes.
You know the growth.
That's the part that scares you.
But you don't even know whatyou don't know, so you stepped
(09:34):
into it.
You may not even realize it,but when it hits you, that's
where it's hard.
And one of the things I wantedto say was that feeling of
unworthiness.
You know, I workedpredominantly in an industry of
men.
This whole journey allowed meto see, oh my God, my ego.
I didn't even need her until,um, oh my, so I'm going to get
(10:00):
really real here.
After I turned 50, you know, um, and the sense of unworthiness.
Even when I was smaller, Iremember when I started to
listen.
I would remember my mom sayinglike, when people would
compliment you oh you look nicetoday, or you did well I had a
(10:20):
hard time receiving the thankyou or affirmation which is
grace to say thank you in return.
You know like oh, you look nicetoday, thank you so much, or
you did really well, thank you.
I would somehow try to dismissit or be like no, it's not a big
thing or anything like that Icouldn't receive and I didn't
(10:40):
understand what that was allabout.
And really hard.
Truth too is, you know, youknow ego.
It's the need to control, lookgood and be right Right.
Well, it took me years to evenknow what that looked like, what
that felt like, how it showedup for the aha moment to hit.
(11:03):
And so, you know, we staysteadfast and committed to
saying I know there's got to bemore.
I want to be free, I want tofeel good about myself, I know I
have value and I want to fullyembrace it and I want to share
it with the world.
Well, these are the things thatkind of end up holding us back,
but if we stay committed to go,I want to overcome that.
(11:23):
You'll see that there's littlethings in life.
I always say I think you getwhat you need when you need it.
Some will be a bigger aha andin some cases it might be little
things.
That starts to open up your,your perspective on things,
right, so that when the nextteaching or lesson comes, you've
(11:44):
been positioned to be able toreceive it and learn even more.
So I feel like my journey hasbeen these little moments either
a conversation coming into aworkshop or whatnot.
That just little by littlestarted to people say peel back
the onions or, in my case, pulloff the blinders.
Little by little, right.
So one day it made sense betweenconnecting what I heard in my
(12:08):
head to how I felt in my heart,to the experiences and memories
I remember, to recognizing thistruth of you know, unworthiness,
and what does that really mean.
And then, when it all cametogether, it's like your mind is
completely blown and your heartwants to just explode.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
And it's a journey.
I think that a lot of peoplewant things immediately.
In my course, from wounds towisdom, I teach people that it
takes a long time to retrainyourself, but once you do, then
those habits become normal.
It was like I was.
It sounds silly, but I wasearlier looking at my dishwasher
and I was like I'm so gratefulI have a dishwasher, you know,
(12:49):
and that just sounds dumb, butlike just to be grateful for
that is a trained habit to lookfor things to be grateful for.
And it's the same thing withwhat you're talking about.
These are trained habits.
This is not something that youjust wake up the next day and go
I'm going to be successful, I'mgoing to quit my job and I'm
going to do X, Y, Z.
You have to train yourselfthese ways.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
It's so true and you know I'm going to do a really
transparent confession.
Yeah, you know I'm a coach andit's like one of those things
where you're trying to shareyour gifts with the world where
people say, well, you need to,you know, put that gift and
something that people candownload.
And I thought, well, everyone'sdoing that.
I don't want to do it.
But I realized that it's soimportant to be able to share
(13:31):
even these few little nuggetsfor those where it resonates,
because I want to touch and helppeople look at their journey,
not not just in business,because if you're an
entrepreneur, you're not puttinglife in the business.
Business is part of your life,right?
So when you're looking at it,how can you navigate the journey
of life?
Because it's a constant rollercoaster.
(13:52):
It's up and down.
When you think you haveeverything figured out,
something else throws acurveball, and I think that
that's what makes it quote hard.
You know we want to kick thenegative words in there, but if
you're also wanting to reallychange, and so I brand as a
trusted advisor and a progressexpert, but I'm business coach
and consultant, but the progressexpert lands because it's
(14:15):
saying, if you are open to behonest and to really receive
that can accelerate yourprogress in the evolution and
transformation of who you needto become to achieve the success
you desire.
And learning and understandingwhat you got into almost
positioned you to not look atthe you know, just the outer
(14:39):
shell of this journey movingforward to success.
It's really saying you got toknow that changes involve.
What does it mean right?
And to be able to reflect onthat to help navigate the
resistant.
You know, because, like you said, it's scary, it's hard, we
don't know what.
We don't know what we'regetting into.
And sometimes you can only movewith that desire.
(15:03):
I just want to be better, Iwant to feel better, I want to
find joy, I want to bedetermined Like what does that
really look and feel like?
And you need all those thingsto really face the hard truth
and to overcome and to moveforward to that place of that
authentic self you know,alignment with who you truly are
(15:25):
, so that you could just show upfully.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Was there a specific either time like a, like, a
turning point in your life?
Were you like this is, I can'tdo the other one anymore, and
then what was that?
Or, if you don't want to talkabout that, was there like a
specific teacher that?
Speaker 2 (15:47):
you gravitated towards, that helped you come to
this realization.
You know, I think that it firststarted the calling, that
desire for something differentin my life I would say would be
the catalyst.
And when I look back, you know,with the decisions I kind of
made, whether they were good ornot, like I mean, I've invested
(16:12):
in programs and they didn'treally reap what I had hoped to
get out of it Right.
But the truth was, in steppinginto that, there were lessons
learned about what not to do andthings about myself that I
didn't expect going through it.
So when I look back, I can'treally, you know, regret or
pinpoint a person, but I feellike, because I was so
(16:33):
determined to really feel goodabout myself, yeah, to love what
I'm doing, to love on people.
I mean, that was the first,hardest question I had to ask
what do you want, sheila?
And the word love, and Ithought, what does that have to
do with business?
But it's everything I want tolove, what I'm doing, I'm going
to love on people.
(16:54):
I want to, you know, pour outthese gifts in love and I just
find when you come from thatplace it moves mountains and I
feel like one defining pointthere were so many, because
there's a lot of blocks andthings that get in our way.
But one thing though that senseof worthiness.
It's huge.
I don't know.
I think we do overcome, but aswe start to grow and evolve and
(17:16):
become more empowered, you know,we become stronger.
But we're dealing with a wholenother level of a sense of
unworthiness and how to face itand overcome that.
But the biggest thing for me wasgoing.
Well, if I'm going to go outand share my gifts with the
world, what value do I reallyhave?
You know?
And when I look back, I've doneso many things that I didn't
(17:38):
allow myself to receive andacknowledge, and they were so
important.
I mean, I had my own coach tellme Sheila, you're like, you're
like every CEO's dream.
If they could have you there bytheir side, because it's it's
the truth is like, if they'reeverywhere and creative, I can
(18:00):
help them get grounded and focusso that they can get traction.
If they have all these ideasand know what to do, but they're
not moving on it, I can ignitepassion.
I could do sales and marketing,but I could also do more
operational things.
So, as a business owner, theydeal with everything.
They're also unique in who theyare, so I can compliment them
(18:21):
very well.
But I couldn't receive that, andso I had to dive deep to go.
What in the world was thatabout?
And there was one I can'tremember what it was, but they
were saying think about athought that you had when you're
addressing this thing.
It may not have beenunworthiness, but what surprised
me was don't ignore what comesto your head, because, even if
(18:42):
it doesn't look related, itprobably is.
And the image that it keptcoming back to was when I was a
really little girl I feel like Iwas about six and my parents
they were, you know, firstgeneration to come and establish
themselves in the US.
Well, they needed help.
It was just my mom and dad, andthey needed help.
(19:03):
So there was me.
I have a younger sister, andthey decided to send us back to
the Philippines for one year sothat they can get settled and
then have us back.
And I remember so vividly.
I was so young but I could notvocalize what I'm about to share
, but I can still hear it tillthis day.
(19:24):
And what was running on my headwas you know, why do you have
to send me away?
Don't you love me?
Am I not important enough?
Why can't I be important enough?
Why can't you love me enough tostay?
And you're six?
How do you say these things?
You probably throw a tantrum ordo that, but I remember staying
(19:47):
silent because I didn't knowhow to process the thoughts and
the feelings that I had, letalone voice it.
The other thing that came to mewas saying no, you're a good
girl, shaylin.
Good girls need to obey, theyneed to listen to their parents.
So if they know Beth and theyneed to send us away, then trust
that.
(20:08):
But I felt like I wasn'timportant enough, I wasn't loved
enough and therefore couldeasily be sent away.
Well, I had no idea I had heldon to that for so long and
bottom line is, when that thattruth surfaced, I started to see
how it kind of permeated andreally spread through other
(20:31):
areas and aspects of my life.
That place where how can I healthat so that it can change?
You know the way I think, how Ifeel, what I do and all these
other areas, and I already knewthat there was a sense of
freedom from that.
You know, to feel that sense ofworthiness and to let go of
(20:59):
that negative and belief in thatlie, yeah, you know.
But to accept it that it is alie, it took me like two minutes
to be like so these are thestories you're talking about?
Like people are like, what arethe stories you're telling
yourself?
I'm like, once upon a time, Idon't know, you know it took a
process and enough exposure tothe place of personal
development and transformationto even understand that language
(21:22):
, to even connect with it to andthen connect it to.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
That's what the story means you know, and that's how
it's been showing up in my lifeall this time.
Yeah, yeah.
What are your tools?
Do you have daily rituals,practices like how do you keep
yourself in a positive space?
Speaker 2 (21:42):
um, you know it's crazy because every time I got
to a quiet place when things gotso hard, even at work, they
kept throwing me things.
Um, at the corporate job I wasin, they kept throwing me things
that I had never done before,actually the company never done
before.
And I want to preface that bysaying that at an early age in
(22:07):
my career the owner gave me partof the company and I took that
to mean that I have aresponsibility to ensure that
this company succeeds.
So when there were problems,ensure that this company succeed
.
So when there were problems,that belief of that ownership I
didn't own most, you know,majority of the company, but
that portion of it felt I wasgrateful for it, right.
(22:31):
But I turned it into this liketyrant kind of thing and didn't
realize it thing like, well, Iam part of the company, like
it's part of my responsibilityto help save it or put the bird,
the building that's on fire andput it out.
So, nurturing this, you knowsavior syndrome, you know
(22:52):
putting it all on myself andrealizing no, it's, it's not my
responsibility, I can onlycontribute, you know.
So when things got so hard, youknow I realized when I got to a
place of pretty much despair.
Yeah, I couldn't.
Everything that I could dowasn't working.
(23:12):
I just I was just at a placewhere I was hitting the wall.
So it really were moments ofdespair because I didn't know
anything else to do.
And I'm only working within myown experience, within my own
limits of knowledge in thisspace I'm dealing with I've
never done before.
It requires new experiences andknowledge.
(23:33):
So when I would get quiet andface that feelings of despair, I
found I don't know clarity, Ifound answers, I found next
steps.
So I feel like I never actuallyacknowledged that.
It was almost like this innatesubconscious thing that I would
(23:54):
do everything every time thingsgot really hard and it always
worked for me, but it was was Ididn't know what, I didn't know,
right, you know.
But now that I was on a path toreally become more mindful and
aware, I realized the value ofit and what is it so?
I want to touch on that becausewhat I would tell people is this
we live in a world where it'sjust getting faster by the
(24:19):
minute.
Before I'm like I'm running ahundred miles an hour.
Now it's 500 miles an hour.
Now I feel like it's a thousandmiles an hour and we feel like
we have to get into this, this,the speed of moving, because
this is the world requires.
But what happens here is, if wekeep nurturing that, if we keep
reinforcing that kind ofbehavior, don't be surprised
(24:43):
that after some time ofconstantly doing this in years
past, you suddenly don't knowhow to stop Right.
And I want to help people inthat space, to support you, to
learn how to stop so you couldspeed up, slow down, so you
could speed up.
It goes against the grain ofthe world, but I'm telling you
(25:03):
there is such beauty, peace, joy, progress that can be gained
when you can get comfortablewith, even if there's a time
pressure, like I don't have timeto even stop.
Can you get to a place whereyou're like I'm so valuable and
I know that I can serve myselfand others more if I could just
(25:25):
stop for just a moment right,you know, clear the mind and
allow the things to come intothe space?
Or just, can I just calm down,get quiet so I can think?
Speaker 1 (25:38):
clearly so.
Do you practice that daily, oris this something that you do as
it needs, as it comes up?
Speaker 2 (25:45):
I feel like I'm doing it all the time, but absolutely
and I think that's the beautyof it, because I want to also
share the fact that you know Ican come in and share tools or
advice, but the truth is likeBarbie share tools or advice,
but the truth is like Barbie.
You're Barbie, I can never beBarbie.
I'm Sheila, you can never beSheila.
And even my motto, when it cameto me, like what would be your
(26:08):
tagline, what's your brandpromise if people work with you?
And I'm like succeed your way,yeah.
So I want to share what you'regoing through, what you're
dealing with, and open up thatperspective so that it can
create some, you know, pull upsome of the blinders so you
could see things more clearly.
Then I want to help you in thatclarity to make a decision for
(26:28):
yourself.
What does it look like to stopand slow down for a minute?
And it's like really embracingand supporting them from a love
of true love and support forthem to figure that out on their
own.
Because telling somebody whatto do it might help, but we
(26:49):
can't control anything right, wecan only contribute.
So if we make suggestions andwhatnot, what really moves a
needle is that they stay open,receive it and really do the
work to go.
Oh my God, I know what thatlooks like, but I don't want to
do it and this is why.
So it makes them go deeper andstarts them to think about what
(27:11):
is forcing certain behaviors,the way they think and what they
feel, to do it.
But when they slowly start todo that, they chip away at the
things that might haveimprisoned them.
Right, you know, and really nomatter how you slice it, there's
some form of freedom that youfind each time you outgrow or
break free from everything thathas kept you small.
Speaker 1 (27:34):
Yeah, I love that.
It sounds like our work is veryaligned with each other, and so
your main audience, or thepeople that you work with most,
are entrepreneurs.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
yes, yeah, and I think it just created that way
because, when I look back, therewas a reason why I worked for
the small business owner ratherthan the big company.
Yeah, and as much as I've doneeverything from operations,
customer service, sales andmarketing, I think my biggest
thing was being that trustedadvisor to the business owner
(28:06):
who was a visionary and that's aleadership role to feel good
about what those next steps are.
Um, to be part of a team, youknow, and recognizing that in
order to achieve a goal, youknow it's more than just one man
(28:27):
or one woman.
You know it really involves thetalent and expertise of so many
different people and that's why, uh, so I'm taking that
experience to really bring itinto a place where I could use
all that as value right in theplace of business.
And, believe me, we all startout wanting to start a business
and we're by ourselves, we don'teven know that we're being a
(28:50):
lone wolf, and that is probablyone of the like the biggest
poison you can have to yoursuccess.
So, but before they can evenrecognize that, they have to be
willing to face some truth.
Like I could do this on my own.
The truth is, you can't.
Everybody needs some help.
Yep, yeah.
And then it's like what can youdo and where are the parts that
you're really struggling with?
(29:12):
Right, but it's not even justknowing that it's now
understanding.
Oh, my god, this is the process.
This is me growing and evolving.
I've got to learn and bewilling to invest in myself and
to receive the knowledge and thethings that other people are
good at, so that I can grow andthen let that overflow to other
(29:34):
people that I pull into mybusiness to help meet their
vision.
You know.
Speaker 1 (29:39):
I have found, though, that for that to happen, you
have to truly believe inyourself, and that's one of the
hardest things for people,because that's why small
businesses fail.
People start them with the ideathat I could do this better, or
I could do x, y, z, blah, blah,blah.
But you have to invest inyourself, and you have to be
willing to invest in yourself intimes when you may not have the
(30:00):
money to invest in yourself.
And?
But you have to invest inyourself and you have to be
willing to invest in yourself intimes when you may not have the
money to invest in yourself.
And then you have to say I'mstill worthy of investing in
myself and moving forward, andthat is a hard, hard road If you
haven't done the inner work.
Speaker 2 (30:12):
It's so true, and here's the thing.
So I'm going to say this peoplemight throw, I don't know
vegetables at me, their salad,it doesn't matter.
But here's the truth throw, Idon't know vegetables at me,
their salad, it doesn't matter.
But here's the truth.
Somebody told me one timeSheila, nobody pays for clarity,
nobody pays for confidence.
You know, but I'm sitting hereand going um, and you just said
(30:36):
it, nobody pays forencouragement or belief.
Right, but the truth is, yeah,we all need someone to believe
in ourselves, and I used to hidefrom that because I thought
there's no, that's not a sixfigure, I can't quantify that.
But the truth is, all thesethings are priceless.
Did you know my whole life,barbie and other people I would.
I would phrase it this waythey're like she.
(30:57):
We have so much energy.
Do you know why people want towork with you?
Because I want to be in thatenergy.
And I thought I never saw thatas valuable and and I'm about to
say this because I'm standingin my worth and my truth, not
from a place of arrogance, butfrom a place of worthiness Yep,
I've got amazing energy.
(31:17):
I'm equivalent to 10 people.
I think I'm the best cheersquad ever, so when you need it,
I'll give you that loving bootysink.
You know what I mean and almostalso share like to believe in
you, right, but not just to belike.
You got this it's almost inorder for you to understand how
(31:39):
much I believe in you.
I reflect back to you yourtruth about who you are and
where you're at at this momentand all the stuff you may have.
Come into the call with, sittingin a bed of poo poo and you're
like, feel like the world is onyour shoulders and there's no
hope.
But when we're done, you'relike I can't do this.
(32:00):
But when we're done, you startto see not only and we're
reminded of your amazingstrength and gifts, but also
seeing the good and all the crapthat you might be sitting in
and how, in that moment, thesethings are serving you.
So I talk in more generality,right, because I'm very
(32:21):
customized, high touch andspecific to you.
This is really where the valueand the power comes, because I
sit there and I'm reallyintentional about being present,
about seeing you, about hearingyou, about getting to know you
and when, all the stuff that youshare, I process, all of it and
then I reflect back vocally sothat you can then receive and
(32:44):
like mirror back.
You know and, and I don't knowwhy Well, I do know why, but
when we look at our own mirror,it's all blurry.
Right, we've been squirted withour own Windex, scrub it down
and there's still streaks.
We don't see ourselves clearly,right.
But when you're in a placewhere you feel like I can trust
them, I feel safe.
(33:05):
Right, I respect her, she won'tlie to me, and I'm sharing now
and reflecting back a very clearreflection of you and what's
happening.
It changes everything, you know, and that's what I can't
quantify.
But the bottom line is that ifyou sat there for months or
years like spinning and notmoving and get being able to
(33:28):
overcome what's getting in yourright, but one conversation
suddenly inspires you and youstart taking action and doing
things you've never done before,how much is that worth to you?
I could never quantify how muchtime you just saved, or maybe
you could go back to that.
I could have saved two years.
That's one thing.
But now, as you start to moveforward, how can you sit there
(33:50):
and be very mindful that I'minvesting in myself?
My time is valuable.
I'm stuck and I don't want towaste it stuck Right.
I want to, I want to, I want to.
I want somebody that I don'twant to waste it stuck right.
I want to, I want to, I want to.
I want somebody that I cantrust to sit there and give it
to me straight so I can keepmoving, because the more that
you progress and the sooner themore impact that you make, the
(34:10):
happier you are, you know?
Um, that doesn't mean it's notgoing to be easy, right?
Speaker 1 (34:15):
right, right, you know nothing that is worth.
It is ever without its own upsand downs, right, we go through
that in general.
How does one um, because we dohave to wrap up how does one get
in contact with you, shouldthey feel like you might be
advantageous to their journey?
Speaker 2 (34:32):
um, yeah, absolutely my website.
Realize, dash, your visioncom.
That's R E A L I Z E dash Y O UR V I S I O N dot I O N dot com
.
There is a place there whereyou could schedule some time
with me and I don't want tosound cavalier or faux pas, but
(34:54):
you're going to step into myplayground and we're going to
have fun, fun with your journey.
The other thing here is I didrecently create this little tip
guide.
It's very simple, it's justthree things.
But if you looked at it fromits, you know, outer shell or
icing, you know you probablywon't get as much out of it.
(35:16):
But if you sat there and reallylooked at those three things,
it's going to force you toreflect deeper to understand
this journey that you're on andwhen you think about it and
reflect back, it's really goingto force you to commit, it's
going to force you to understandwhat change means and stuff
like that.
So if it's something of valueto you, then it's yours, you
(35:38):
know, and it's that realize yourvisioncom forward.
Slash roller coaster.
Speaker 1 (35:45):
Love all of your things for sure.
Oh, thank you, stuck, sucks,those kinds of those kinds of
thought, because they're realand they're true.
So I'm sure anybody who workswith you, like you said, you're
probably a beautiful mirror forthem and we appreciate you
coming on the show and sharingyour vision, your vision, your
expertise and your journey.
Thank you so much.
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