Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Harnessing your
anxiety.
There's that song, isn't there?
My anxiety, exactly, yes,watches me Instead of watching
you, your anxiety.
What about if you watched youranxiety and you could watch it
(00:22):
from a different position, likealmost as if you were some kind
of an observer, a neutralobserver, observing yourself
Flying on the wall?
Yes, and all the actions thatyour anxiety you know makes you
take, or the actions that youknow you're like.
(00:43):
How can I say?
I'm lost for words at themoment.
Help, well, help me the anxiety.
Instead of allowing the anxietyto take hold of you, you grab
the anxiety and take it by.
Take hold of it.
Yeah, so you're harnessing itand you're becoming powerful
(01:08):
because of it.
Wow, instead of in spite of it,well done, yeah, that is so.
You're using your anxiety as ifit was energy to thrust you
forward into doing, wild coming,what you want to do and become
powerful beasts.
You know, while you were doingthat movement with your hands,
(01:30):
you know you were likeharnessing, like she was like
holding her two hands, like shewas holding, you know, the, the
horse's muzzle, the muscle, thereins, the reins.
I'm sort of like, can't it'safternoon podcast and I'm like,
oh, I've gone into some kind ofnap mode anyway.
Yeah, like you're holding on tothe rains, or like holding on
(01:52):
to this, the rains, on thosedragons that you see in these,
you know in these films, andbecome powerful because of it.
Because of it, you know, youcan harness that dragon, which
could be like your anxiety.
You can fly with it and imaginethe power that that will give
you.
Instead of feeling destroyedand upset and overwhelmed and
(02:17):
awful because of your anxiety,you're harnessing your anxiety
to use it to your advantage, andthat's what we're going to be
talking about in this week'sepisode of get real with the
english sisters.
We are therapists and we'rehere to help you.
So harnessing the power I alwayssee it was like, like you know,
(02:40):
those solar panels you have,yes, so it just got lots of them
actually for the garden.
Just your anxiety.
Imagine your anxiety going intoone of those and giving you
energy.
Oh, I love that.
Instead of depriving you ofenergy, I love that.
It's actually giving you energyto do things To be able to see
at night.
Yeah, because we've installedthem now in the garden, on the
(03:01):
little garden pathway, and itwas always so dark there.
Yeah, but now with these lovelylittle light, they're not
little.
They're like lampposts, butthey've got the solar energy on
the top.
Now, at night, we have energyand we have their.
The pathway is lit up so thatwe can just walk through it
(03:22):
easily without falling over oranything.
Well, yeah, that's good, that'sgood, and so that, in the same
way you can you know, like whatyou were saying you know you
don't have to trip up on youranxiety.
You can use it to give youlight, to give you to light your
path in your life.
What I think the people that aredo suffer anxiety.
(03:43):
Usually it means because you'renormally you're quite an
empathetic person and you dounderstand other people, don't
you?
And you're like you're reallyin touch with your emotions.
So that is being in touch withyour emotions and understanding
people is like a superpower.
So you can use that to youradvantage instead of allowing
(04:05):
your anxiety maybe to to I don'tknow how it affects you to be a
curse, like I'm free, I'mcursed with the anxiety.
No, it can be also seen as ablessing in this case.
Yes, because it can be a formof energy, if we think about it.
A lot of these very creativepeople in the past, even people
(04:26):
like steve jobs, and thatthey've all suffered from
anxiety but, instead of seeingit just as a curse, they've used
it to fuel their creativity or,in spite of it, they managed to
go on exactly even it, withthis great bouts of.
So if we do think about it asthe opposite of a curse and we
(04:47):
can say, yes, I am an anxiousperson, what can I do?
I can use it as a form ofenergy.
Well, yeah, and so you can turnit around and say, okay, I'm
feeling anxious about this, butI'm still going to do it, and
I'm just going to do it maybe abit slower.
You might need to ask for help,yes, and I'm just going to do
it, maybe a bit slower.
You might need to ask for help,yes, so you can get through it
(05:08):
and use it and you can probablysee things a bit different to
what the people around you cansee.
You have a differentperspective on life.
Usually, when you do suffer fromanxiety, yes, which can help
you.
It can feel overwhelming, butit can also help you.
Yes, and we do know thisexactly.
Yes, you are right.
It can also, and it can alsoencourage you to say, like study
(05:32):
or learn something new, becauseif you're anxious about some
something.
Someone that doesn't sufferfrom anxiety might just say oh,
I'm just gonna go and do thatanyway.
Yeah, I just wing it.
Yeah, but if you do, you mightbe more.
You know, you might have theeye to curate something, to feel
that you're not quite competentat that, and then go and study
(05:55):
a little bit more for it andthen you'll become you know, it
becomes part of you like aalmost like an unconscious
competence, as to say, you knowyou become very competent at it,
at an unconscious level whereit's just easy for you to
perform that task because youwere anxious at the very
beginning.
(06:15):
So sometimes you know beinganxious isn't necessarily no,
it's not necessarily a bad thingor something you can't use to
your advantage.
Obviously, if it's, if you'resuper anxious, if you're really
anxious and it's stopping youfrom doing things, then you do.
You do need to ask for help,yes, but if it's a level of
(06:37):
anxiety that's just making youlike, stopping you from from
doing what you want to do orbeing who you want to be, or
like if you have social anxietyit's stopping you from going out
, you can also look fromtraveling.
Yeah, you can look at it in adifferent way and say, okay,
it's going to give me energy nowand okay, maybe I'm not going
to go to the himalayas and andwalk up them or go to nepal or
(06:59):
go somewhere really exotic, butI can maybe take a trip.
I can take a trip to brighton,which is a little seaside resort
in england, or somewhere nearyou, and you can use it to your
advantage.
You can harness it and say,okay, I'm gonna take small steps
, I'm gonna be your friend, I'm,I'm, I'm going to harness you.
(07:22):
Yeah, I'm gonna harness you andI'm going to ride this wave as
to say you know, this way, Ithink most of us are anxious
about things.
A lot of us manage to cover itup and we just don't acknowledge
it and don't say it.
Yes, that's true, just uh,what's it called power through
it, but I think the more, themore powerful you you are is
(07:47):
when you you can admit to it,yeah, you can acknowledge it,
and you can say I'm actuallyfeeling really quite anxious
about that, and even justverbalizing it and saying it out
loud, perhaps to a friend oreven to yourself.
That can already be step onefor those of you who may be
suffering from anxiety and maynot be even realizing it, but I
(08:08):
think if you're not, if you know, you're probably aware of it if
you're listening to this kindof podcast already.
But you know, sometimes you canbe feeling more anxious about
something and just know thatit's normal as well.
My husband he's never normallysaid anything like this.
Yesterday he was saying hedidn't know where to park
because he was going into Rome.
He didn't know where to park.
He didn't know what to parkbecause he was going into Rome.
(08:29):
He didn't know where to park,he didn't know what train to get
, and he was getting quiteworked up about it.
And I said you're sounding likeme, are you getting really
anxious about this now?
And then he started laughingand he goes yeah, I suppose I am
.
I also get anxious aboutparking, and driving into new
areas where I don't know and I'mnot confident about that Also
(08:51):
gives me anxiety.
But I acknowledge it and I sayI get anxious about that.
And so what I do is I prepare.
If I know I've got to drivesomewhere which I don't know,
I'll study the map, I'll look atit, I'll make sure I help, I
get help, you know, with thegoogle maps or with whatever,
whatever app I'm using and I'llbe prepared, but I still do.
I get anxiety from it and I andI openly say it to everybody
(09:15):
yeah, I think acknowledging it,because in the end he said he
realized that it doesn't make meweaker character for him,
because he doesn't normally dothis or say it.
You're right, so it wascompletely out of character.
So it was.
It was curious to notice thathe was actually getting more in
touch with his own emotions,probably because he's being more
around you now, probably, andhe's he's spending more time
(09:36):
with you now, isn't he?
Yeah, he's learning to be morein touch with his emotions.
You can harness your anxiety.
You can make it become yourfriend.
There's no reason why you can't, is there?
Well, I mean totally yourfriend.
Yes, yeah, because that's ifyou didn't, that's a good way of
(09:57):
thinking about it as well.
I mean, like the solar panels,yes, if you didn't have anxiety,
they're definitely friendly.
You have to think what wouldreplace anxiety creativity,
which would be finding creativesolutions to my problem or my
what's making me anxious.
That would be the, the, thesolution would be creativity.
(10:18):
So I'd want to harness morecreativity than feeling anxiety.
I'd want to feel more creative,which is what I do when I get
anxious.
I start thinking what kind ofcreative solution can I find for
this problem that's giving meanxiety sometimes I just get
anxiety, even at night, you know.
When I close my eyes, I startthinking about all the things
(10:40):
I've got to do, and I'm atherapist, so it's not we're
immune to this.
We studied it because we feltanxious right at the very
beginning of our you know, ofour careers, and that's the
reason why we also decided toget into this line of work,
exactly so, and that's very,that's very, very common.
(11:00):
So I know, when I experienceanxiety, sometimes at night,
because I start having recurringthoughts, I'll start saying the
dreaded thoughts.
I'll start thinking, oh,tomorrow I've got to do that
thing, and, and then I mightfind a creative solution for it,
and and then, okay, I found acreative solution for it, and
then it'll come back up.
So what I do in that case is Isay thank you.
(11:24):
I try and relax, you know, takea few deep breaths, say thank
you, brain, I found a creativesolution.
Now I think I can let it go,just let it go, and I take
another few deep breaths and Ido manage to let it go.
What helps me is thinking aboutthe sea waves and the rolling
(11:44):
in and gentle rolling out of thewaves.
So, like your happy place, I goback to my happy place and I
focus a lot on that at night, onthe waves rolling in and
rolling back out, and I canimagine them and smell the sea
smell and the sand on my feet,and that does actually help me,
(12:05):
you kind of meditation.
Yes, I find that helps me onceI found the creative solution.
Because if I don't, then I'llfind I'll find myself thinking
sometimes there isn't a creative, no solution.
So you really do have to saygoodbye, let go, yes, and just
say, okay, I'll deal with you inthe morning.
Yes, yes, you have to let it go.
(12:27):
You have to sleep on it.
Yes, they say, sleep on things.
Your unconscious mind oftenfinds a solution for you, yes,
without you having to doanything at all.
That is very, very true.
And how often has that happened?
So many times?
Saying wouldn't exist if itdidn't.
No, that's why people say sleep.
Don't think the saying wouldn'texist if it didn't happen.
That's why people say sleep onit.
Don't make a decision now, justleave it for now and do
(12:53):
something completely different.
Distract your mind.
Do something else.
Watch a film or something,something that's going to take
your mind off it.
Obviously Don't watch a filmthat's going to be about your
problem, because I've done thatbefore and that hasn't worked.
No, watch something that'sgoing to be light and airy and
(13:14):
maybe funny, if possible, togive you, you know that, that
humor that helps.
And then you know, tell yourbrain if it keeps on the the
questions keep on popping up.
Put the thought into the solarpanel and allow it to create
energy for you from tomorrow.
Excellent, and the solar panel,yes, yes, I agree with that
(13:36):
completely.
Put the thought into the solarpanel, let it go in there, as if
it's like brewing air sunshine,gathering, gathering, gathering
, gathering this lovely energythat will then be able to shine
a light in another moment ofdarkness for you.
It will be able to lead the way, exactly because there is no
(13:59):
light without dark.
Is there the dark?
And then we need both of them.
We do so, we do need, we needthe moments.
We need the moments of anxiety,which also make you reflect.
It makes you reflect on yourlife and, obviously, if you're
like what we said before, ifyou're suffering from anxiety to
the extent that you're havingpanic attacks and you know it's
(14:21):
getting it's it's getting in theway of you living a normal life
.
You need to seek just get somehelp, please, because there's so
many techniques, tools andtechniques to help you that are
available now, thank goodness,and one of them is I think the
(14:41):
main one is mindfulness.
So, if anything, go and listento a guided meditation we have
many of them on our YouTubechannel or to somebody else,
anybody you like that just youknow Google guided meditation
and go and listen to one ofthose, because they really can
help you relax and unwind andyour subconscious and
(15:04):
unconscious mind will take overand you don't have to do
anything at all.
You just have to listen to thevoices Exactly.
It's very relaxing.
It's something that can reallyreally help Incredibly, actually
.
Yeah, so as a song, they'veharnessed the anxiety to make
loads of money because it's thenumber one hit.
(15:24):
Yes, you do that as well.
And, uh, let us know how youget on.
Let us know if you're feelinganxious, we can help you.
To be right to us on tech, giveus a text.
We can maybe give you, help youin some way, or you can book a
session with us if you like, onzoom.
We are here to help you andsending you lots of love and
(15:49):
smiles from the English sisters.
Bye.