October 17, 2025 • 23 mins
Caregiving doesn’t come with a manual, but it can come with a guide. We sit down with Margo, a certified Aging Life Care Manager and medical social worker, to map the real-world path families can follow when aging, dementia, or a sudden fall turns life upside down. From the first assessment to crisis navigation, she shows how a clear plan and a trusted team can replace guesswork with confidence.
We get practical about dementia—how to shift from correcting facts to validating feelings, why “You sound upset” opens doors that “This is your home” closes, and what options exist beyond memory care communities. Adult day programs, home supports, and respite are on the table, and Margo explains when each makes sense. We also tackle an overlooked challenge: finding help beyond search ads. Margo points to the Aging Life Care Association directory, where families can locate experienced care managers by ZIP code and get reliable, local guidance when it matters most.
Margo’s national guides—covering assisted living, Parkinson’s, fall prevention, and wound care—turn overwhelm into action. Each guide outlines who should be on your team, what to track, which documents to organize, and how to manage symptoms day to day. We also explore hoarding disorder through a trauma-informed lens, offering language that supports dignity and steady progress. A powerful case study brings it all together: after a late-life hip fracture, Margo coordinated ER care, rehab, and a smooth move to assisted living, helping her client go from isolated and vulnerable to social and thriving.
If you’re caring for a parent, navigating a new diagnosis, or planning ahead for your own aging, this conversation offers practical tools, compassionate scripts, and a roadmap you can trust. Listen, share with someone who needs clarity today, and subscribe for more neighbor-tested insights that make hard moments easier.
Tucker Senior Life Care
Margo Tucker, LSW, CDP
121 Beech Road, Englewood, NJ, United States, New Jersey
(201) 310-0901
margo@tuckerslc.com
margotucker.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
This is the Good Neighbor Podcast, the place
where local businesses andneighbors come together.
SPEAKER_01 (00:06):
Here's your host, Doug Drohan.
Hey everyone, welcome to anotherepisode of the Good Neighbor
Podcast, brought to you by theBergen Neighbors Media Group.
I am your host, Doug Drohan.
And today we are joined byMargot of the Tucker Senior Life
Care Company.
Margo, welcome to the show.
SPEAKER_02 (00:25):
Thank you so much for having me, Doug.
SPEAKER_01 (00:28):
You're welcome.
So senior life care, it is a atopic that is on the front of a
lot of people's minds, whetherit's they themselves are going
through senior moments or in alot of cases it's their parents.
I am the son of two 90-year-oldparents who live in Florida.
Um so it's uh definitelysomething that I experience.
(00:51):
And, you know, one thing I'velearned in my years in this
business that I'm in now is thatyou know, senior care is a very
diverse um, I guess, business umcategory.
There's so many different thingsthat go into caring for seniors,
so many different issues that wedeal with, not just on the
health and medical side, butalso the you know, paperwork,
(01:14):
legal wills, estate planning,things like that.
So there's a lot that goes intoit.
So tell me what exactly, youknow, on your website it says
your go-to for navigating allthings aging.
So what does that mean?
SPEAKER_02 (01:28):
Um, so what that means is I am part of what's
called the Aging Life CareAssociation.
We used to be called geriatriccare managers.
Um, I am a medical social workerwho helps my clients.
I guide them through all of thechallenges of aging.
I give expert advice if there'sa fall, if there's a stroke, if
(01:50):
there's dementia, behavioraldementia, how do you navigate
those things?
How do you pull together a careplan and a team, a support team
to carry people through thechallenges of aging?
SPEAKER_01 (02:05):
Okay.
So, I mean, as you said, youknow, there's different ailments
that people um deal with.
And I think talking to uh thechildren of parents who've dealt
with dementia uh or Alzheimer's,it's a really challenging um
episode in their lives, youknow, not obviously just their
(02:25):
parents, but them themselves ortheir siblings to see your
parent go through that.
But then also what kind of careis available.
Um, those are the things thatyou help with?
SPEAKER_02 (02:35):
Those are the things I help with.
And a lot of it is education.
You know, when you have a lovedone with dementia, the most
important thing is to understandthat their brain is not working
in the way that it did.
And because of that, it'simportant to change the way that
we approach people withdementia, how we speak to them.
Uh, so many times people try tobring their loved one to
(03:00):
reality.
You know, um, I want to go home,they say, and the child says,
This is your home.
Look, here's your chair, here'syour, you know, XYZ.
And and, you know, it gets veryfrustrating because that is, you
know, you are trying to explainit, but their brain is not able
to comprehend it.
So the way that you approach itis when someone says, I want to
(03:23):
go home, or you know, um, younever call, you never come by,
you go after the feeling.
You say, You sound upset.
Right or you sound frustrated,you know.
So, so educating people on theways to manage someone with
dementia, you know, is one ofthe biggest roles that I play
care management.
SPEAKER_01 (03:43):
So you would help somebody also help them choose
like where like the resourcesavailable.
So there's a lot of memory careum communities now, either
standalone or part of biggerassisted living communities.
Uh, one of the things that youwould help is a getting them
maybe the right medical care,but B advising them of the
(04:04):
different places that areavailable to them.
SPEAKER_02 (04:06):
The different places, all the different
options.
There are things people don'tthink about, like an adult day
program.
SPEAKER_00 (04:13):
Right.
SPEAKER_02 (04:13):
Um, you know, bringing in the resources,
bringing in the support.
That's the most important thing.
That's how we get through this.
You know, when people say, youknow, Margo, what is your
greatest lesson that you'velearned?
It's don't age alone.
Build your team.
SPEAKER_00 (04:29):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (04:30):
And there's a lot out there.
And it's really hard tonavigate.
It's hard to know where to evenstart.
Where do you even look for thesupport?
Um, and that's where an aginglife care associate or you know,
geriatric care manager comesinto play.
They assess specifically what'sgoing on with this client, um,
get a good understanding ofwhat, you know, what's what,
(04:52):
with looking at everything,their physical, their emotional,
their medical, their, you know,their support system, and and
then pulling together the rightresources and educating families
on this is what's available.
Um, and then, you know, and thencreating, you know, connecting
and creating whatever that careplan is and the support for
(05:14):
clients.
SPEAKER_01 (05:16):
So, how would somebody find you?
So, you know, I just typed indementia care in uh, you know,
my search bar.
And the first thing is asponsored ad by artists, then
there's a sponsored ed byFoxtrail Memory Care, a
sponsored ad by Sunrise SeniorLiving, and then there's
Alzheimer's.gov, Alzheimer'sAssociation, Alzheimer's
(05:38):
Society, um, Chelsea SeniorLiving, uh MedlinePlus.gov, uh
RJ, RWJ Barnabas Health, VA.gov,Alzheimer's, you know, so my
point is just found out my, youknow, God forbid this happens,
but you know, my one of myparents has dementia.
(05:59):
How do I know that you, somebodylike you, exists?
Because when I go on uh, youknow, on the computer, I am just
seeing, well, I'm seeingsomebody that you probably know
um who's a dementia carespecialist.
But aside from that, I don't,you know, there's so many, and
this is the the issue withGoogle, right?
Is that I've got like 20 choiceshere.
SPEAKER_02 (06:20):
Right.
SPEAKER_01 (06:21):
How am I gonna go through?
Like, am I calling each andevery one of these places?
And each and every one of themis gonna ask me to come down to
visit it with my parent.
Like, how do I know that youexist?
SPEAKER_02 (06:32):
That's a tough one.
People don't know that we exist.
You know, we we're really tryingto get the word out about Aging
Life Care Association.
There's a website, Aging LifeCare Association.org.
And if you go on there and youtype in your zip code, it up it
will show you who's in yourarea, what geriatric care
(06:52):
managers are in your area.
And we're trying to get the wordout doing things like this.
Yeah, you know, I've been umworking on doing TikToks, you
know, to educate, you know,trying to get the word out that
we exist, yeah.
And what a great resource it isto have someone to guide you on
and take you through thisjourney who knows exactly what's
(07:14):
what.
SPEAKER_01 (07:14):
Right.
So it sounds like it's a very,you know, for you as this being
your business, it sounds like itcould be a very emotional uh,
you know, day every day, youknow, every single one of your
clients is is definitely goingthrough something emotional.
It doesn't have to be dementia,there's a lot of things that you
help with.
So, how did you get into thisline of work?
(07:35):
Like, what's your background?
SPEAKER_02 (07:37):
Um, you know, it's interesting.
One of the reasons why I got inthis line of work is because um
I was adopted.
And even if you're adopted intoa loving family, I feel that
there's still feelings ofabandonment and being unloved.
And um, when I was growing up, Ialways wanted to work with kids.
Like that was clear to me.
(07:57):
Um, when I went to college, Ihad an opportunity to do an
internship every semester.
And one of my internships was atthe Jewish home, the nursing
home on North Miami Beach.
And I walked in there, Doug, andI didn't know what happened at
the time, but I found myself,you know, the left behind, the
unlocked and the abandoned.
(08:18):
And my entire life just took asharp turn to the right, and I
started studying geriatrics.
Um, I worked at Mount SinaiHospital for nine years.
Um, then I had my kids.
And after I had my kids, rightafter 9-11, I was feeling really
like spiritually lost, and Iwanted to give back and I didn't
know in what way.
So I decided to go get educatedon you know geriatrics and um
(08:43):
what was happening in thecommunity.
I went to a conference, I metsomeone, and she said to me,
You're a care manager.
I never even heard of a caremanager, and I skipped away.
I'm like, I'm a care manager,and I've been a care manager
ever since.
Um, yeah, it's the best job inthe world.
I love my job.
I love my job, you know.
SPEAKER_01 (09:05):
I mean, there's so many people that I've met at
senior networking events, anduh, you know, a lot of them have
that same kind of passion forwhat they do because it is um,
it can be very rewarding, but asI said, it's it's gonna be
emotionally taxing.
And I think to be successful,you really do have to love what
you do, and it's helping people.
(09:26):
Um, and it's interesting, likewhen you walked in, you kind of
knew it.
Um like I I had a similar, notnot that this was my career, but
I was into um always intoworking out, and um, I had
gotten laid off from a job and Iwas working out at this gym, and
I said to the owner, Hey, do youneed a personal trainer?
And he's like, Yeah, I getcertified, I'll hire you.
(09:46):
So the first day I was able towork there, he said, Okay,
there's your first client.
And I don't know, the minute Italked to her and started
working with her, I just felt sonatural.
And it just felt like afterspending 15 years in an industry
where I never felt at ease, uh,this was something just like,
wow, you know, I don't know,maybe I was cut out for this.
(10:08):
So um, you know, it'sinteresting that you have, you
know, that association or thatmemory of walking into, you
know, kind of either you foundit or it found you.
Um, so you know, as you said,after several years of um, you
know, working for somebody else,uh, you decided to go into
business for yourself.
(10:28):
And like, what has that beenlike?
And and would you recommend itfor someone who's listening and
is like, oh, you know, I'mthinking about going off my own,
but I don't know what to do.
I don't know if it's gonna work.
I don't know if I'll besuccessful.
SPEAKER_02 (10:42):
I absolutely recommend it.
I I say take the leap, you know,um, and again, surround yourself
with people who can support you.
Get educated on what you need todo.
Talk to like-minded people whohave started businesses.
I had my mentor who supported mein starting my business.
I just kind of put it out thereand I started getting cases.
(11:05):
And now I've been getting casesfor 15 years.
Um, it's only word of mouth.
I really don't advertise.
Um, and uh it just organicallyhappens.
So I say, I say, you know,believe in yourself and you
know, take the risk, take thechance, but set yourself up for
success by getting educated, byunderstanding, you know, what
(11:31):
it's gonna entail.
SPEAKER_01 (11:32):
Yeah.
But you know, selfishlyspeaking, I wouldn't recommend
that everybody start a businessand not advertise, considering
the you know, the line of workthat I'm in.
But uh listen, I I talk to a lotof people who you know, their
business has been built by wordof mouth, and I think you know,
all of us need you know,referrals to to kind of validate
what we're doing and and to growand scale the business.
(11:55):
Um, so that that's amazing thatyou've been able to do that.
I I want to go over uh all ofthe different, you know, when I
when I go on your website,there's um you have a section
here called guides.
So a guide to assisted living,wound care.
So let's go over all thesedifferent things that you can
assist with.
SPEAKER_02 (12:13):
Thank you.
So what I did was um I reallyjust like how you just Googled
dementia and you have so manychoices.
I decided to create professionalguides for everybody, either the
person with disease, the person,you know, caring for someone
with a challenge or disease, tohelp you navigate what are the
(12:35):
steps you take, right?
You get a diagnosis, forexample, Parkinson's.
That's one of my guides.
You get a diagnosis ofParkinson's.
What do you do first?
Where do you even start?
So my guide goes through stepone, you build your team, who's
on your team.
Step two, you start journaling.
(12:55):
I I offer a free journal on mywebsite that's specific for
Parkinson's disease.
Um, you get your medical, youknow, paperwork and documents
together.
Step three, you learn all aboutsymptom management because
Parkinson's is about symptommanagement.
And I list every kind,everything that's been
successful with all my clients,um, things that people don't
(13:19):
know about, like um mag puremagnesium spray for restless leg
syndrome.
You know, there are there are alot of things out there to help
you manage and navigate disease.
So I created, I I don't have thedementia one yet.
I'm I'm gonna be working on onefor navigating dementia.
SPEAKER_00 (13:38):
Okay.
SPEAKER_02 (13:38):
But you know, I pulled together guides, the
assisted living.
What do you do first?
How do you find an assistedliving?
What do you need to know?
You know, everything that youneed to know is in these guides,
step by step, laid out veryclearly what are the resources.
It's chock full of resources.
Um, and they're national guides.
SPEAKER_01 (13:59):
Yeah, okay.
I mean, that's important.
There are people that help youknow, help you choose assist a
living communities, and there'scertain, you know, business
franchises that can help you,you know, you hire them and
they'll take you and your familyaround to different places.
And I think it's important toknow who they are too.
Um, because again, a lot ofthese things are so overwhelming
(14:20):
to do it all of your, you know,everything on yourself is a lot.
And I think it's important thateveryone knows that they're not
alone, that there is help outthere.
Um, so you have a lot ofaffiliations, and I don't often
see that.
So um and I think that'simportant, right?
Because it gives you um I thinkuh an extra set of credentials
(14:42):
to gain trust.
Uh you mentioned the the Age andLife Care Association or ALCA.
What are some of the other umaffiliations you have?
SPEAKER_02 (14:52):
Um now I'm affiliated with NASW, National
Association of Social Workers,um a CDP, a certified dementia
professional.
Um, and I have you know my basiclicensing, and then I'm part of
ALCA Aging Life CareAssociation.
SPEAKER_01 (15:11):
Okay.
Now you you have in one of yourguides something about hoarding,
um, which I find interestingbecause I was at a um a senior
networking event and they hadsomeone speak who was talking
about hoarding.
And the emotional part of likeyou can't just go into
somebody's home and say, throwall this out, you know, the
reason why people hoard anddon't throw anything away.
(15:33):
Um I have I grew up in a housewhere you can never fit a car in
our garage, let alone, you know,maybe you can fit a bicycle if
you're lucky.
Uh and my parents, the funnything is when they moved to
Florida and sold their house inLong Island, I said, Oh, good.
So now you can, you know, have agarage that you can actually
park a car.
(15:53):
But my mother basically broughteverything with her from Long
Island, even though they'redownsizing to a much smaller
house.
And then, you know, likes to goon garage sales and buy things
because they're a dollar,whether or not we need it.
Maybe somebody, one of her 15grandchildren, or now nine
great-grandchildren will want.
But you know, it's always, Idon't know if she's a hoarder,
but my grandfather, her fatherum definitely never threw
(16:17):
anything out.
His mother, mygreat-grandmother, they were
German.
I don't know if that hasanything to do with it, but it
does.
They're also um, yeah, and myson calls my my mother Oma, by
the way.
Um you know, the certaindepression era people, I think,
you know, that you're notthrowing something out because
you know, everything's got acost to it.
Uh so hoarding disorderspecialist.
(16:40):
So, what does that mean?
SPEAKER_02 (16:41):
So um over 30 years I've had a lot of hoarding
clients with hoarding disorder,and I was trained by the
hoarding disorder institute ofNew York.
So I am a hoarding disorderspecialist, and you know,
hoarding is a spectrum.
There's a big spectrum of youknow, types of hoarding and all
of that.
But hoarding disorder,interestingly, is a psychiatric
(17:05):
response to trauma.
And that's why you can't justtell someone to clean their
room.
That, you know, someone who hashoarding disorder has
deep-rooted psychiatric issuesand trauma.
Um, so my hoarding disorderguide is so fantastic.
It I write out what to say andhow to say it.
(17:27):
I give you a full understandingof hoarding disorder so that
you're able to approach it witha new sense of um knowledge,
compassion, um, and someexpertise.
There are ways to handle it.
And interestingly, they say thathoarding disorder affects about
5% of our population, which inand of itself is a huge number.
(17:50):
But it's a silent disease.
People are, you know, they'reisolated, they don't announce
that they have hoardingdisorder.
So just imagine what that numberreally is.
We think it's 5% of what'sreported.
Um, yeah, but it's it's it'shoarding disorder is a really,
really challenging, challengingpsychiatric disorder, and there
(18:14):
are ways to handle it, you know,and so the guide takes you
through everything you need toknow.
SPEAKER_01 (18:22):
Yeah.
So what is the best way forpeople to contact you?
SPEAKER_02 (18:28):
Um, the best way for people to contact me, if they're
interested in care management,is either to email me.
Um, it's Margo at Tuckerslc.com.
Um, or to call me.
You know, my cell is201-310-0901.
And if you're interested, ifsomeone's interested in checking
(18:51):
out the guides, there's a wholeslew of guides.
There's fall prevention, fallrecovery, um, assisted living,
wound care, non-healing woundcare.
That's a great one.
How you have to heal wounds fromthe inside out and the outside
in, uh, good nutrition, thingslike that.
So if they're interested inseeing the guides, it's on my
(19:11):
website at morgotucker.com.
SPEAKER_01 (19:15):
Okay.
So uh not to put you on thespot, but um can you share,
like, you know, not we don'thave to talk for half an hour
about it, but share uh a storyof somebody that you helped.
Um, you know, what's what's lookat it from like a case study?
So what did they come to youwith?
You know, what was the issue,whether it was the the child or
(19:37):
the actual you know senior, whatwas that that we'll say they
were suffering from?
Uh and how did you help them andhow did they feel afterwards?
SPEAKER_02 (19:46):
All right.
Um oh boy.
SPEAKER_01 (19:50):
Yeah, I know.
Sorry, we didn't prepare.
No, no, no, that's okay.
SPEAKER_02 (19:55):
Yeah, yeah.
Um, okay, so um, let me justthink of like a current client
that I'm dealing with.
All right, so um I have aclient, um, she's in her late
70s.
She had a traumatic brain injurywhen she was young, so she has a
very simple mind.
She has really the personalityof like an eight-year-old.
(20:16):
Um, her mother, she lived a verysheltered life.
Her mother passed away 10 yearsago, and the attorney called me
in to manage her care, tooversee her care, because there
was nobody, there is um just acousin, a cousin, cousin that's
not involved.
Um, so for 10 years, I have beenum following um this client, and
(20:39):
I've been, you know, goinghelping her with you know doctor
appointments and you know,medication management and um
people to cook for her.
I you know, set up and andsupportive services companion,
someone to take her to um, youknow, appointments, etc.
Uh a couple of weeks ago shefell and she broke her hip.
(21:02):
Um, so I navigated, I was rightthere as soon as I got the call.
I was at the emergency room.
I'm the boots on the ground.
I show up, you know, when thecrisis happens.
Um, so I got to the hospital, Inavigated her through the
emergency room, I navigated herthrough the hospital, I got her
into rehab, I navigated herthrough the whole rehab meeting,
(21:25):
you know, with the team, doingcare plan meetings and such.
Um, we decided that the nextstep instead of going home back
alone would be assisted living.
I found the assisted living forher local.
I set everything up.
I got her, I set up her roombecause she has nobody.
I got her into the assistedliving where she's been living
(21:47):
for the past three weeks, andshe is absolutely thriving.
She's social now, she's happy,she's um just doing beautifully.
So I've been there every step ofthe way.
And that's you know, that's howit works.
You know, I have clients whereI'll start, you know, at the
(22:08):
beginning of dementia where I'mshaving their car key because
they're trying to drive andcarry them through their last
breath.
Everything in between, all thecare, dealing with the
wandering, dealing with theagitation, you know, all of it.
Um, so that though that wouldbe, you know, a good example of
of what a care manager does, youknow, and how we do it, how we
(22:32):
do it.
SPEAKER_01 (22:33):
That's great.
Well, Margo, thank you very muchfor for sharing that with us.
And uh, this was great.
I really I really appreciate it.
It's very educational for me aswell.
SPEAKER_02 (22:42):
Thank you, Doug.
Thank you.
And I'm a phone call away if youneed any support for your
parents.
SPEAKER_01 (22:46):
I appreciate it.
Yeah, that's great.
Uh all right, so bear with me.
Well, you and I will be rightback.
Okay, thank thank you forlistening to the Good Neighbor
Podcast.
SPEAKER_00 (22:55):
To nominate your favorite local businesses to be
featured on the show, go togmpbergen.com.
That's gmpbergen.com or call 201298 8325.
This is the Good Neighbor Podcast, the place
where local businesses andneighbors come together.
SPEAKER_01 (00:06):
Here's your host, Doug Drohan.
Hey everyone, welcome to anotherepisode of the Good Neighbor
Podcast, brought to you by theBergen Neighbors Media Group.
I am your host, Doug Drohan.
And today we are joined byMargot of the Tucker Senior Life
Care Company.
Margo, welcome to the show.
SPEAKER_02 (00:25):
Thank you so much for having me, Doug.
SPEAKER_01 (00:28):
You're welcome.
So senior life care, it is a atopic that is on the front of a
lot of people's minds, whetherit's they themselves are going
through senior moments or in alot of cases it's their parents.
I am the son of two 90-year-oldparents who live in Florida.
Um so it's uh definitelysomething that I experience.
(00:51):
And, you know, one thing I'velearned in my years in this
business that I'm in now is thatyou know, senior care is a very
diverse um, I guess, business umcategory.
There's so many different thingsthat go into caring for seniors,
so many different issues that wedeal with, not just on the
health and medical side, butalso the you know, paperwork,
(01:14):
legal wills, estate planning,things like that.
So there's a lot that goes intoit.
So tell me what exactly, youknow, on your website it says
your go-to for navigating allthings aging.
So what does that mean?
SPEAKER_02 (01:28):
Um, so what that means is I am part of what's
called the Aging Life CareAssociation.
We used to be called geriatriccare managers.
Um, I am a medical social workerwho helps my clients.
I guide them through all of thechallenges of aging.
I give expert advice if there'sa fall, if there's a stroke, if
(01:50):
there's dementia, behavioraldementia, how do you navigate
those things?
How do you pull together a careplan and a team, a support team
to carry people through thechallenges of aging?
SPEAKER_01 (02:05):
Okay.
So, I mean, as you said, youknow, there's different ailments
that people um deal with.
And I think talking to uh thechildren of parents who've dealt
with dementia uh or Alzheimer's,it's a really challenging um
episode in their lives, youknow, not obviously just their
(02:25):
parents, but them themselves ortheir siblings to see your
parent go through that.
But then also what kind of careis available.
Um, those are the things thatyou help with?
SPEAKER_02 (02:35):
Those are the things I help with.
And a lot of it is education.
You know, when you have a lovedone with dementia, the most
important thing is to understandthat their brain is not working
in the way that it did.
And because of that, it'simportant to change the way that
we approach people withdementia, how we speak to them.
Uh, so many times people try tobring their loved one to
(03:00):
reality.
You know, um, I want to go home,they say, and the child says,
This is your home.
Look, here's your chair, here'syour, you know, XYZ.
And and, you know, it gets veryfrustrating because that is, you
know, you are trying to explainit, but their brain is not able
to comprehend it.
So the way that you approach itis when someone says, I want to
(03:23):
go home, or you know, um, younever call, you never come by,
you go after the feeling.
You say, You sound upset.
Right or you sound frustrated,you know.
So, so educating people on theways to manage someone with
dementia, you know, is one ofthe biggest roles that I play
care management.
SPEAKER_01 (03:43):
So you would help somebody also help them choose
like where like the resourcesavailable.
So there's a lot of memory careum communities now, either
standalone or part of biggerassisted living communities.
Uh, one of the things that youwould help is a getting them
maybe the right medical care,but B advising them of the
(04:04):
different places that areavailable to them.
SPEAKER_02 (04:06):
The different places, all the different
options.
There are things people don'tthink about, like an adult day
program.
SPEAKER_00 (04:13):
Right.
SPEAKER_02 (04:13):
Um, you know, bringing in the resources,
bringing in the support.
That's the most important thing.
That's how we get through this.
You know, when people say, youknow, Margo, what is your
greatest lesson that you'velearned?
It's don't age alone.
Build your team.
SPEAKER_00 (04:29):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (04:30):
And there's a lot out there.
And it's really hard tonavigate.
It's hard to know where to evenstart.
Where do you even look for thesupport?
Um, and that's where an aginglife care associate or you know,
geriatric care manager comesinto play.
They assess specifically what'sgoing on with this client, um,
get a good understanding ofwhat, you know, what's what,
(04:52):
with looking at everything,their physical, their emotional,
their medical, their, you know,their support system, and and
then pulling together the rightresources and educating families
on this is what's available.
Um, and then, you know, and thencreating, you know, connecting
and creating whatever that careplan is and the support for
(05:14):
clients.
SPEAKER_01 (05:16):
So, how would somebody find you?
So, you know, I just typed indementia care in uh, you know,
my search bar.
And the first thing is asponsored ad by artists, then
there's a sponsored ed byFoxtrail Memory Care, a
sponsored ad by Sunrise SeniorLiving, and then there's
Alzheimer's.gov, Alzheimer'sAssociation, Alzheimer's
(05:38):
Society, um, Chelsea SeniorLiving, uh MedlinePlus.gov, uh
RJ, RWJ Barnabas Health, VA.gov,Alzheimer's, you know, so my
point is just found out my, youknow, God forbid this happens,
but you know, my one of myparents has dementia.
(05:59):
How do I know that you, somebodylike you, exists?
Because when I go on uh, youknow, on the computer, I am just
seeing, well, I'm seeingsomebody that you probably know
um who's a dementia carespecialist.
But aside from that, I don't,you know, there's so many, and
this is the the issue withGoogle, right?
Is that I've got like 20 choiceshere.
SPEAKER_02 (06:20):
Right.
SPEAKER_01 (06:21):
How am I gonna go through?
Like, am I calling each andevery one of these places?
And each and every one of themis gonna ask me to come down to
visit it with my parent.
Like, how do I know that youexist?
SPEAKER_02 (06:32):
That's a tough one.
People don't know that we exist.
You know, we we're really tryingto get the word out about Aging
Life Care Association.
There's a website, Aging LifeCare Association.org.
And if you go on there and youtype in your zip code, it up it
will show you who's in yourarea, what geriatric care
(06:52):
managers are in your area.
And we're trying to get the wordout doing things like this.
Yeah, you know, I've been umworking on doing TikToks, you
know, to educate, you know,trying to get the word out that
we exist, yeah.
And what a great resource it isto have someone to guide you on
and take you through thisjourney who knows exactly what's
(07:14):
what.
SPEAKER_01 (07:14):
Right.
So it sounds like it's a very,you know, for you as this being
your business, it sounds like itcould be a very emotional uh,
you know, day every day, youknow, every single one of your
clients is is definitely goingthrough something emotional.
It doesn't have to be dementia,there's a lot of things that you
help with.
So, how did you get into thisline of work?
(07:35):
Like, what's your background?
SPEAKER_02 (07:37):
Um, you know, it's interesting.
One of the reasons why I got inthis line of work is because um
I was adopted.
And even if you're adopted intoa loving family, I feel that
there's still feelings ofabandonment and being unloved.
And um, when I was growing up, Ialways wanted to work with kids.
Like that was clear to me.
(07:57):
Um, when I went to college, Ihad an opportunity to do an
internship every semester.
And one of my internships was atthe Jewish home, the nursing
home on North Miami Beach.
And I walked in there, Doug, andI didn't know what happened at
the time, but I found myself,you know, the left behind, the
unlocked and the abandoned.
(08:18):
And my entire life just took asharp turn to the right, and I
started studying geriatrics.
Um, I worked at Mount SinaiHospital for nine years.
Um, then I had my kids.
And after I had my kids, rightafter 9-11, I was feeling really
like spiritually lost, and Iwanted to give back and I didn't
know in what way.
So I decided to go get educatedon you know geriatrics and um
(08:43):
what was happening in thecommunity.
I went to a conference, I metsomeone, and she said to me,
You're a care manager.
I never even heard of a caremanager, and I skipped away.
I'm like, I'm a care manager,and I've been a care manager
ever since.
Um, yeah, it's the best job inthe world.
I love my job.
I love my job, you know.
SPEAKER_01 (09:05):
I mean, there's so many people that I've met at
senior networking events, anduh, you know, a lot of them have
that same kind of passion forwhat they do because it is um,
it can be very rewarding, but asI said, it's it's gonna be
emotionally taxing.
And I think to be successful,you really do have to love what
you do, and it's helping people.
(09:26):
Um, and it's interesting, likewhen you walked in, you kind of
knew it.
Um like I I had a similar, notnot that this was my career, but
I was into um always intoworking out, and um, I had
gotten laid off from a job and Iwas working out at this gym, and
I said to the owner, Hey, do youneed a personal trainer?
And he's like, Yeah, I getcertified, I'll hire you.
(09:46):
So the first day I was able towork there, he said, Okay,
there's your first client.
And I don't know, the minute Italked to her and started
working with her, I just felt sonatural.
And it just felt like afterspending 15 years in an industry
where I never felt at ease, uh,this was something just like,
wow, you know, I don't know,maybe I was cut out for this.
(10:08):
So um, you know, it'sinteresting that you have, you
know, that association or thatmemory of walking into, you
know, kind of either you foundit or it found you.
Um, so you know, as you said,after several years of um, you
know, working for somebody else,uh, you decided to go into
business for yourself.
(10:28):
And like, what has that beenlike?
And and would you recommend itfor someone who's listening and
is like, oh, you know, I'mthinking about going off my own,
but I don't know what to do.
I don't know if it's gonna work.
I don't know if I'll besuccessful.
SPEAKER_02 (10:42):
I absolutely recommend it.
I I say take the leap, you know,um, and again, surround yourself
with people who can support you.
Get educated on what you need todo.
Talk to like-minded people whohave started businesses.
I had my mentor who supported mein starting my business.
I just kind of put it out thereand I started getting cases.
(11:05):
And now I've been getting casesfor 15 years.
Um, it's only word of mouth.
I really don't advertise.
Um, and uh it just organicallyhappens.
So I say, I say, you know,believe in yourself and you
know, take the risk, take thechance, but set yourself up for
success by getting educated, byunderstanding, you know, what
(11:31):
it's gonna entail.
SPEAKER_01 (11:32):
Yeah.
But you know, selfishlyspeaking, I wouldn't recommend
that everybody start a businessand not advertise, considering
the you know, the line of workthat I'm in.
But uh listen, I I talk to a lotof people who you know, their
business has been built by wordof mouth, and I think you know,
all of us need you know,referrals to to kind of validate
what we're doing and and to growand scale the business.
(11:55):
Um, so that that's amazing thatyou've been able to do that.
I I want to go over uh all ofthe different, you know, when I
when I go on your website,there's um you have a section
here called guides.
So a guide to assisted living,wound care.
So let's go over all thesedifferent things that you can
assist with.
SPEAKER_02 (12:13):
Thank you.
So what I did was um I reallyjust like how you just Googled
dementia and you have so manychoices.
I decided to create professionalguides for everybody, either the
person with disease, the person,you know, caring for someone
with a challenge or disease, tohelp you navigate what are the
(12:35):
steps you take, right?
You get a diagnosis, forexample, Parkinson's.
That's one of my guides.
You get a diagnosis ofParkinson's.
What do you do first?
Where do you even start?
So my guide goes through stepone, you build your team, who's
on your team.
Step two, you start journaling.
(12:55):
I I offer a free journal on mywebsite that's specific for
Parkinson's disease.
Um, you get your medical, youknow, paperwork and documents
together.
Step three, you learn all aboutsymptom management because
Parkinson's is about symptommanagement.
And I list every kind,everything that's been
successful with all my clients,um, things that people don't
(13:19):
know about, like um mag puremagnesium spray for restless leg
syndrome.
You know, there are there are alot of things out there to help
you manage and navigate disease.
So I created, I I don't have thedementia one yet.
I'm I'm gonna be working on onefor navigating dementia.
SPEAKER_00 (13:38):
Okay.
SPEAKER_02 (13:38):
But you know, I pulled together guides, the
assisted living.
What do you do first?
How do you find an assistedliving?
What do you need to know?
You know, everything that youneed to know is in these guides,
step by step, laid out veryclearly what are the resources.
It's chock full of resources.
Um, and they're national guides.
SPEAKER_01 (13:59):
Yeah, okay.
I mean, that's important.
There are people that help youknow, help you choose assist a
living communities, and there'scertain, you know, business
franchises that can help you,you know, you hire them and
they'll take you and your familyaround to different places.
And I think it's important toknow who they are too.
Um, because again, a lot ofthese things are so overwhelming
(14:20):
to do it all of your, you know,everything on yourself is a lot.
And I think it's important thateveryone knows that they're not
alone, that there is help outthere.
Um, so you have a lot ofaffiliations, and I don't often
see that.
So um and I think that'simportant, right?
Because it gives you um I thinkuh an extra set of credentials
(14:42):
to gain trust.
Uh you mentioned the the Age andLife Care Association or ALCA.
What are some of the other umaffiliations you have?
SPEAKER_02 (14:52):
Um now I'm affiliated with NASW, National
Association of Social Workers,um a CDP, a certified dementia
professional.
Um, and I have you know my basiclicensing, and then I'm part of
ALCA Aging Life CareAssociation.
SPEAKER_01 (15:11):
Okay.
Now you you have in one of yourguides something about hoarding,
um, which I find interestingbecause I was at a um a senior
networking event and they hadsomeone speak who was talking
about hoarding.
And the emotional part of likeyou can't just go into
somebody's home and say, throwall this out, you know, the
reason why people hoard anddon't throw anything away.
(15:33):
Um I have I grew up in a housewhere you can never fit a car in
our garage, let alone, you know,maybe you can fit a bicycle if
you're lucky.
Uh and my parents, the funnything is when they moved to
Florida and sold their house inLong Island, I said, Oh, good.
So now you can, you know, have agarage that you can actually
park a car.
(15:53):
But my mother basically broughteverything with her from Long
Island, even though they'redownsizing to a much smaller
house.
And then, you know, likes to goon garage sales and buy things
because they're a dollar,whether or not we need it.
Maybe somebody, one of her 15grandchildren, or now nine
great-grandchildren will want.
But you know, it's always, Idon't know if she's a hoarder,
but my grandfather, her fatherum definitely never threw
(16:17):
anything out.
His mother, mygreat-grandmother, they were
German.
I don't know if that hasanything to do with it, but it
does.
They're also um, yeah, and myson calls my my mother Oma, by
the way.
Um you know, the certaindepression era people, I think,
you know, that you're notthrowing something out because
you know, everything's got acost to it.
Uh so hoarding disorderspecialist.
(16:40):
So, what does that mean?
SPEAKER_02 (16:41):
So um over 30 years I've had a lot of hoarding
clients with hoarding disorder,and I was trained by the
hoarding disorder institute ofNew York.
So I am a hoarding disorderspecialist, and you know,
hoarding is a spectrum.
There's a big spectrum of youknow, types of hoarding and all
of that.
But hoarding disorder,interestingly, is a psychiatric
(17:05):
response to trauma.
And that's why you can't justtell someone to clean their
room.
That, you know, someone who hashoarding disorder has
deep-rooted psychiatric issuesand trauma.
Um, so my hoarding disorderguide is so fantastic.
It I write out what to say andhow to say it.
(17:27):
I give you a full understandingof hoarding disorder so that
you're able to approach it witha new sense of um knowledge,
compassion, um, and someexpertise.
There are ways to handle it.
And interestingly, they say thathoarding disorder affects about
5% of our population, which inand of itself is a huge number.
(17:50):
But it's a silent disease.
People are, you know, they'reisolated, they don't announce
that they have hoardingdisorder.
So just imagine what that numberreally is.
We think it's 5% of what'sreported.
Um, yeah, but it's it's it'shoarding disorder is a really,
really challenging, challengingpsychiatric disorder, and there
(18:14):
are ways to handle it, you know,and so the guide takes you
through everything you need toknow.
SPEAKER_01 (18:22):
Yeah.
So what is the best way forpeople to contact you?
SPEAKER_02 (18:28):
Um, the best way for people to contact me, if they're
interested in care management,is either to email me.
Um, it's Margo at Tuckerslc.com.
Um, or to call me.
You know, my cell is201-310-0901.
And if you're interested, ifsomeone's interested in checking
(18:51):
out the guides, there's a wholeslew of guides.
There's fall prevention, fallrecovery, um, assisted living,
wound care, non-healing woundcare.
That's a great one.
How you have to heal wounds fromthe inside out and the outside
in, uh, good nutrition, thingslike that.
So if they're interested inseeing the guides, it's on my
(19:11):
website at morgotucker.com.
SPEAKER_01 (19:15):
Okay.
So uh not to put you on thespot, but um can you share,
like, you know, not we don'thave to talk for half an hour
about it, but share uh a storyof somebody that you helped.
Um, you know, what's what's lookat it from like a case study?
So what did they come to youwith?
You know, what was the issue,whether it was the the child or
(19:37):
the actual you know senior, whatwas that that we'll say they
were suffering from?
Uh and how did you help them andhow did they feel afterwards?
SPEAKER_02 (19:46):
All right.
Um oh boy.
SPEAKER_01 (19:50):
Yeah, I know.
Sorry, we didn't prepare.
No, no, no, that's okay.
SPEAKER_02 (19:55):
Yeah, yeah.
Um, okay, so um, let me justthink of like a current client
that I'm dealing with.
All right, so um I have aclient, um, she's in her late
70s.
She had a traumatic brain injurywhen she was young, so she has a
very simple mind.
She has really the personalityof like an eight-year-old.
(20:16):
Um, her mother, she lived a verysheltered life.
Her mother passed away 10 yearsago, and the attorney called me
in to manage her care, tooversee her care, because there
was nobody, there is um just acousin, a cousin, cousin that's
not involved.
Um, so for 10 years, I have beenum following um this client, and
(20:39):
I've been, you know, goinghelping her with you know doctor
appointments and you know,medication management and um
people to cook for her.
I you know, set up and andsupportive services companion,
someone to take her to um, youknow, appointments, etc.
Uh a couple of weeks ago shefell and she broke her hip.
(21:02):
Um, so I navigated, I was rightthere as soon as I got the call.
I was at the emergency room.
I'm the boots on the ground.
I show up, you know, when thecrisis happens.
Um, so I got to the hospital, Inavigated her through the
emergency room, I navigated herthrough the hospital, I got her
into rehab, I navigated herthrough the whole rehab meeting,
(21:25):
you know, with the team, doingcare plan meetings and such.
Um, we decided that the nextstep instead of going home back
alone would be assisted living.
I found the assisted living forher local.
I set everything up.
I got her, I set up her roombecause she has nobody.
I got her into the assistedliving where she's been living
(21:47):
for the past three weeks, andshe is absolutely thriving.
She's social now, she's happy,she's um just doing beautifully.
So I've been there every step ofthe way.
And that's you know, that's howit works.
You know, I have clients whereI'll start, you know, at the
(22:08):
beginning of dementia where I'mshaving their car key because
they're trying to drive andcarry them through their last
breath.
Everything in between, all thecare, dealing with the
wandering, dealing with theagitation, you know, all of it.
Um, so that though that wouldbe, you know, a good example of
of what a care manager does, youknow, and how we do it, how we
(22:32):
do it.
SPEAKER_01 (22:33):
That's great.
Well, Margo, thank you very muchfor for sharing that with us.
And uh, this was great.
I really I really appreciate it.
It's very educational for me aswell.
SPEAKER_02 (22:42):
Thank you, Doug.
Thank you.
And I'm a phone call away if youneed any support for your
parents.
SPEAKER_01 (22:46):
I appreciate it.
Yeah, that's great.
Uh all right, so bear with me.
Well, you and I will be rightback.
Okay, thank thank you forlistening to the Good Neighbor
Podcast.
SPEAKER_00 (22:55):
To nominate your favorite local businesses to be
featured on the show, go togmpbergen.com.
That's gmpbergen.com or call 201298 8325.
Popular Podcasts
Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang
Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.