January 21, 2025 • 22 mins
In this heartfelt and unconventional episode, we take a surprising turn to explore the emotional parallels between real estate and the Bluey Season 3 finale. Whether you’re a parent, a fan of the show, or simply curious, this discussion reveals how the raw emotions of a move—excitement, uncertainty, and nostalgia—mirror the experiences of your clients. Tune in for actionable advice on navigating the emotional complexities of real estate and building empathy in your business.
What You’ll Learn in This Episode:
- How Bluey beautifully reflects the emotional layers of moving.
- Why empathy is a vital tool for real estate agents.
- Strategies for holding space for your clients’ emotions without absorbing them.
- Tips for managing setbacks and uncertainty during transactions.
- The importance of trusting the process and embracing “what’s meant to be.”
- Practical ways to connect with clients on a deeper, human level.
This episode is a heartfelt reminder that real estate is about so much more than contracts and closings—it’s about helping people through life’s pivotal moments. Using lessons from Bluey, we explore how emotional intelligence, empathy, and faith in the process can transform your real estate practice into something truly meaningful.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
We're going to go a little off script today in this
episode and I want to talk aboutthe Bluey season three finale.
I have three little kids anine-year-old, a six-year-old
and a three-year-old and Blueyis absolutely the only show that
the entire family enjoys,including me and my husband.
(00:22):
I was recently watching theseason three finale, which I've
seen a million times, along withevery other episode.
I'm sure the parents of youngkids can relate, but even if you
aren't a parent, this show ismagical.
It's so good.
It has this really justincredible ability to capture
the human experience.
So if you have not seen it,please, please, please watch it.
It's on Disney Plus.
(00:43):
But in particular, the seasonfinale just reminded me so much
of real estate and let me setthe stage for you if you have
not seen it.
In the finale, the Healerfamily basically consists of
Bandit the dad, chili the mom,and then Bluey and Bingo they're
(01:05):
both the sisters and Bandit thedad gets a really great job
opportunity that he feels likeis going to be so great for his
family, but it's going torequire them to move and leave
this house where they basicallyhave raised their kiddos so far,
and his wife Chili, you cantell, is really not loving this
(01:27):
because it's going to take themaway from their family that's
close by, their friends, theirneighborhood, that they love,
and you can imagine it is justthis whirlwind of emotions for
the whole family.
And watching this episode,especially at the end, I was
reminded that there is so muchmore to real estate than just
(01:50):
the transaction.
I know that we do deals day in,day out and I mean even like
the terms we use, it's like I'munder contract, contract to
close management.
It just totally takes out thehumanity of real estate and I
think we all know and understandand sometimes just forget that
(02:13):
real estate especially forpeople who aren't investors or
it's.
You know, there's big emotionsand we're often dealing with
huge life changes, sometimesreally sad, sometimes happy, but
it can be such a roller coasterof emotions and uncertainty for
our clients.
And what I love about thisepisode is that it is so
(02:38):
poignant and really cuts to howemotional and how complicated
real estate moves can be forpeople and how it just they
really impact their lives somuch.
So if you are struggling oryou're like, why do I do this?
Because I know sometimes we canfeel like we're just pumping
(03:01):
deals and just do it grindingand just turning the crank.
I encourage you to watch thisBluey episode because I think it
will be a powerful reminder ofthe difference that we make in
our clients' lives through theups and downs of real estate
transaction.
But I also think it's a reallygreat reminder that we need to
have empathy for our clientslives and emotions and guiding
(03:28):
them through these huge lifechanges.
Now, spoiler alert at the endthe family has essentially moved
all of their belongings out ofthe house and the buyers of
their home back out, becausethey found a house that they
loved more.
Now I know from a real estateperspective we're like I'm not
(03:51):
having my client move out of ahouse when the closing is not
completely firm.
But you know, shit happens andsometimes buyers get cold feet
and they don't care if they losetheir earnest money deposit.
So in the case of this episode,I mean it's just emotional
roller coaster.
I am left in absolute tears.
At the end, bandit, the dadgets the message that the deal
(04:18):
falls through.
There's this beautiful scene ofhim tearing out the for sale
sign and throwing it, basicallyindicating he's not going to be
taking this job and that they'restaying.
Chili, just like jumps on topof him and is so incredibly
happy.
And then Bluey and Bingo rollback into that empty house where
(04:38):
all their stuff was gone.
But you can just tell, everyonewas so incredibly happy to not
be moving.
And even though they didn't move, I still think that it just
highlights the impact thatmoving has on people.
So I really want to get intothe lessons that I took away
(05:02):
from this episode, and I know itseems silly, but this show is
just so good and this episode inparticular is just so relatable
to our jobs as real estateagents.
I also think that there is alsoa more beautiful message of we
just have to have faith thatthings are working out the way
that they need to.
(05:22):
And I don't know about you, butI feel like when I'm working
with clients, a lot of the timesI say what's meant to be is
meant to be, and it will be Likeif the condo documents prove to
be a total disaster and youdon't want to buy.
What's meant to be is meant tobe.
So there are a lot of things Iwant to get into, but the main
(05:46):
things are here's what I feellike are the real estate
parallels with this episode?
I feel like.
There are a lot of emotionallayers of buying or selling a
home.
We can absolutely experienceuncertainty and setbacks and
then we ultimately just have tohave faith that things are
working out for the best.
(06:06):
As long as we are doing thebest we can and we're doing our
job, what's meant to be is goingto be, and we just sometimes
have to let go and just letthings play out.
Let's dive into the emotionallayers of buying or selling a
home.
Just like the Healer family,our clients are often juggling
(06:28):
huge life changes when they'rebuying or selling a home.
We have new jobs, relocations,there's family milestones like
the birth of a family, or maybeeven just letting go of a family
home, and it's not always happy, right.
Sometimes there's sad emotions,sometimes there's grief, even
if a move could be happy.
So we have divorce, we havesomebody who's passed away.
(06:51):
I think a lot of the times weforget that we are dealing with
some of the most raw aspects ofhumanity and I really feel like
a great real estate agent issuch a good shepherd and such a
good space holder for people andtheir emotions.
(07:12):
I know that that's not in thejob description technically, but
from my 20 years of being inreal estate.
The best real estate agentshold space for their clients and
their big emotions withouttaking it on themselves, without
taking things personally, and Ithink that that's such an
(07:33):
important piece of being a greatreal estate agent is being able
to set that boundary of.
I know you're having bigfeelings right now and I'm here
for you.
I think becoming a parentreally helped me with this.
I don't think I was really goodat it before I became a mom,
and I'm not saying that you haveto have kids to learn how to do
this, but I do think thatknowing which feelings are yours
(07:58):
and which are your clients is areally really good life skill,
and having that discernment isreally important.
The next thing is theuncertainty and setbacks.
We are dealing with people andprocesses and as much as we want
to control things, make surethings go smoothly, there's
always uncertainty and there areoftentimes setbacks.
(08:20):
Deals can fall through,timelines can shift and
unexpected challenges inevitablyarise.
And, just like in this Blueyepisode, it's not just about the
logistics of real estate.
It's not about oh, we had allour contingencies waived or
cleared and then that persondidn't buy the home.
(08:42):
It's really about how thosechanges are impacting your
client's emotions and theirsense of security.
Great real estate agents aregoing to be masters at setting
expectations and really layingout how the process should go
ideally.
But we also have to be able toexplain to our clients that
(09:04):
things can go wrong.
We can't control everything,which I know is hard.
We act like risk managers inreal estate, which is a really
great reason to hire a realestate agent to make sure that
things go as right as possibleor increases the chances of
things going right and gettingto closing with minimal hiccups.
But I also think we need to bea steadying presence in the face
(09:26):
of uncertainty or setbacks andreally not being reactive and
helping clients process ouremotions while keeping that
bigger picture in focus.
So again, going back to holdingspace, being steady and really
just making sure that you'redoing everything you can to
(09:48):
manage that uncertainty andthose setbacks when they arise.
One of my biggest pet peeves iswhen agents tell their clients
that something's going wrongwithout having solutions to the
problem.
So I don't think we should hideanything or lie to our clients.
But let's say I get a call andI'm representing the buyer and
(10:12):
the listing agent lets me knowthat the basement has flooded, I
am not going to turn around andcall my client to tell them
that the basement has flooded.
First of not going to turnaround and call my client to
tell them that the basement hasflooded, first of all, it's not
even their house yet, so it'sreally not their problem.
But I want to know how is thisissue getting solved so I can
then go to my client with whatthe solution to that problem is.
(10:34):
So I'm going to give thelisting agent and the seller
some time to line up ServPro,figure out why the basement
flooded, remedy the situation orat least get a game plan in
place so then I can communicateto my client hey, something bad
happened, the basement flooded,but here's the game plan.
(10:54):
The same goes for deliveringnews to the other side of the
transaction.
So, for example, for deliveringnews to the other side of the
transaction.
So, for example, if your clienthas a setback in their
financing, you're representingthe buyer, delivering news to
the listing agent that yourclient's having a setback.
That's not great communication,that's not managing those
(11:15):
setbacks.
Well, you need to have asolution and it needs to be a
win-win for both sides.
And again, we don't have toimmediately deliver it as soon
as we hear it, let's processthat setback and let's come up
with solutions and informationand a plan of attack that's
(11:36):
going to help our client feelbetter and also help them feel
like you're doing a great jobmanaging that process.
The last thing and I know forsome of you this might seem a
little like woo-woo, but Ireally truly believe what's
meant to be is supposed to be.
In the 20 years I've beenselling real estate, I've never
(11:59):
had somebody end up with thehouse that they weren't supposed
to have.
So I know it can be hard whenclients miss out on deals.
We lose in multiple offers.
Maybe something blows up oncethey're under contract.
But I really believe thatwhatever's meant to be is is
meant to be.
I've had situations where aclient goes under contract,
(12:22):
something is super wrong withthe house, we can't come to
terms on negotiation items andwe cancel the contract in.
The client literally lost theirjob two days later.
So I really feel like that wasdefinitely the best thing to
happen.
They ultimately weren't in aposition to purchase that home
and that home inspection was agreat easy out for them.
(12:44):
So we didn't have to go throughfinancing contingency and all
of that stuff.
So sometimes it's hard, but I dothink we have to let go of
control and just trust thatthings are working out for the
best.
So I know that when a dealfalls through or plans change
especially if you need thatclosing, you need that money it
(13:06):
can feel devastating in themoment, but I know in my heart
that those moments often lead tosomething better down the road
and clients can smell commissionbreath.
Commission breath is the worstthing you can have.
So we just have to release thatcontrol and just have faith
that things are going to workout.
To recap this section we asreal estate agents need to be
(13:31):
really great at dealing with theemotions of buying and selling
a home, dealing with thoseuncertainty and those setbacks
and then ultimately just havingfaith that what's meant to be is
meant to be.
Now I want to dig a little bitdeeper into building empathy in
your real estate business,because I think empathy is one
of those emotional intelligencetools that makes a great real
(13:55):
estate agent being able to putyourself in your client's shoes
and really understand how thismove or sale is impacting them
or this purchase is impactingthem.
The first step, I think, is justunderstanding where your
clients are coming from.
What is their emotional journeythroughout this transaction?
(14:16):
So, like the Healers and Bluey,they were saying goodbye to a
home full of memories.
That house didn't justrepresent a house for them.
That was a home full ofmemories for them.
I also think they were feelinglike nervous about moving to an
unknown place and maybe mourningthe loss of their future that
(14:36):
they thought they were going tohave in this house.
It can be a emotional rollercoaster.
My preteen daughter and I liketo call, when we're feeling all
the feels, rainbow chameleon.
So I think that real estatetransactions can often be so
rainbow chameleon, like we haveall the feels.
And the thing is our clientsprocess these emotions
(14:57):
differently.
Every person processes emotionsdifferently.
Some people are more outwardlyprocessing, some people are
internally processing.
So I don't think we need to betherapists that's not our job.
I do think we need to have someemotional intelligence in
understanding how are ourclients feeling, and it is okay
to ask them that.
I actually think that's areally human thing to do.
(15:17):
It's such a nice thing to do,like how are our clients feeling
, and it is okay to ask themthat.
I actually think that's areally human thing to do.
It's such a nice thing to do,like how are you feeling about
this move?
What a powerful question to askyour clients, and I don't think
a lot of agents are asking thatquestion.
I think that gives you a lot ofgood understanding to where
they're coming from, which isI'm excited, I'm nervous, I'm
(15:38):
feeling really sad.
I also think that's anopportunity to step in and give
them an amazing experience.
You might be able to go aboveand beyond for them.
So maybe there's a home full ofmemories and they were marking
the height of all their kids ontheir door jam.
Maybe you go in and you prythat door jam off and you just
(16:02):
replace it.
You have a handy person come inand just do that and then
you're able to gift them thatdoor jam that has all of their
kids measurements on it.
So, looking for thoseopportunities to have an
emotional connection with yourclient and have maybe a
meaningful opportunity todeliver an amazing client
experience, just keep your eyesopen to that.
(16:23):
I don't think we need to hidefrom the emotions of the
experience.
I actually think we can usethem to deliver a better
experience and buildrelationships.
I also want to talk about somepractical ways that you can show
empathy.
I think being present andreally actively listening is
such a key to understanding whatyour client's concerns and
(16:44):
emotions are.
Again, asking good questionsand not shying away from
understanding how they'refeeling about things, because
sometimes it just feels good tobe listened to.
Sometimes our clients just needto vent, especially in
situations where they're feelinglike things are out of control
(17:04):
or that they're reallyemotionally heightened.
The next way that you can showempathy is just to reassure them
.
I think, as humans, we all wantto be reassured that things are
going to be okay.
So when setbacks happen, remindthem that we're going to do
what we can do in order to getthings back on track.
(17:24):
But sometimes there's justthings that are out of our
control.
But I'm here to guide youtowards the right solution and
what's best for you.
Hopefully will be successful inselling your home or buying
this home.
The other thing is just offersolutions that really take into
account their best interests.
So I think with clients, theyalways want to feel like you're
(17:48):
on their side.
So that's another way that wecan show empathy is that not
only do we understand them, butwe're on the same team, and
that's something I like toremind clients throughout the
process is that it's not weunderstand them, but we're on
the same team and that'ssomething I like to remind
clients throughout the processis that it's not me against you,
against the listing agent,against the seller.
You and I are on the same team.
So what you want and what yourend goal are, that's the most
(18:08):
important thing to me.
We are team get this house orteam, sell this house.
And then, lastly, I think again,we just need to trust the
process.
You can only control what youcan control and I know we want
to control everything, but youcan only do so much and it is
hard when things fall apart.
(18:30):
I know I personally take somuch responsibility for
something that doesn't go wellor falls apart on me, but
sometimes it's a little biteasier to accept that defeat of
maybe a deal getting canceledwhen I know that I did the best
I could, when I know that Itried to account for all of the
(18:51):
things that could go wrong andanything that was in my control
I managed, managed.
So definitely make sure thatthere's a bit of just trusting
the process, but do what you canto control what you can control
and then you kind of have torelease the rest and not worry
about it too much, or elseyou're just going to be wracked
with anxiety and worry, which isnot a fun place to be in.
(19:13):
I really encourage all of you togo watch that Bluey season
finale.
I dare you to watch it withoutcrying at the end.
It is just so heartbreaking.
It definitely pulls at yourheartstrings and my kids laugh
at me Actually, no, mynine-year-old cries with me, but
(19:34):
then everyone else looks at melike I'm crazy.
But it is so good.
Please watch it.
But it is a great reminder ofall the emotional layers
involved in a move, in a homesale, and that it's so
complicated.
It involves emotions, itinvolves big moves, it just it's
so great.
I love it so much.
It also teaches us theimportance of having faith in
(19:58):
the process and that you have tostay grounded in the moment and
just show up with empathy andcompassion when things get tough
or even when they don't Justhave empathy and compassion,
because this is a big deal forour clients and it's so often we
forget that Real estate is somuch more than houses.
It is truly about our clientsand their stories, and being
(20:22):
that steady presence that yourclients need can absolutely help
them navigate the logistics andthe emotions of their buying or
selling journey.
And ultimately, I just want youto remember that setbacks are
going to happen.
Nobody's perfect.
We are dealing with verycomplex situations, oftentimes
(20:48):
Even when shit totally hits thefan.
Usually things are working outfor everyone's higher good, even
if that path isn't clear rightaway.
So thank you for listening tothis maybe somewhat
unconventional episode of HappyAgent Co.
But I just had to jump onbecause this was fresh in my
mind and I thought that it wouldbe a fun little break from the
norm.
We're going to go a little off script today in this
episode and I want to talk aboutthe Bluey season three finale.
I have three little kids anine-year-old, a six-year-old
and a three-year-old and Blueyis absolutely the only show that
the entire family enjoys,including me and my husband.
(00:22):
I was recently watching theseason three finale, which I've
seen a million times, along withevery other episode.
I'm sure the parents of youngkids can relate, but even if you
aren't a parent, this show ismagical.
It's so good.
It has this really justincredible ability to capture
the human experience.
So if you have not seen it,please, please, please watch it.
It's on Disney Plus.
(00:43):
But in particular, the seasonfinale just reminded me so much
of real estate and let me setthe stage for you if you have
not seen it.
In the finale, the Healerfamily basically consists of
Bandit the dad, chili the mom,and then Bluey and Bingo they're
(01:05):
both the sisters and Bandit thedad gets a really great job
opportunity that he feels likeis going to be so great for his
family, but it's going torequire them to move and leave
this house where they basicallyhave raised their kiddos so far,
and his wife Chili, you cantell, is really not loving this
(01:27):
because it's going to take themaway from their family that's
close by, their friends, theirneighborhood, that they love,
and you can imagine it is justthis whirlwind of emotions for
the whole family.
And watching this episode,especially at the end, I was
reminded that there is so muchmore to real estate than just
(01:50):
the transaction.
I know that we do deals day in,day out and I mean even like
the terms we use, it's like I'munder contract, contract to
close management.
It just totally takes out thehumanity of real estate and I
think we all know and understandand sometimes just forget that
(02:13):
real estate especially forpeople who aren't investors or
it's.
You know, there's big emotionsand we're often dealing with
huge life changes, sometimesreally sad, sometimes happy, but
it can be such a roller coasterof emotions and uncertainty for
our clients.
And what I love about thisepisode is that it is so
(02:38):
poignant and really cuts to howemotional and how complicated
real estate moves can be forpeople and how it just they
really impact their lives somuch.
So if you are struggling oryou're like, why do I do this?
Because I know sometimes we canfeel like we're just pumping
(03:01):
deals and just do it grindingand just turning the crank.
I encourage you to watch thisBluey episode because I think it
will be a powerful reminder ofthe difference that we make in
our clients' lives through theups and downs of real estate
transaction.
But I also think it's a reallygreat reminder that we need to
have empathy for our clientslives and emotions and guiding
(03:28):
them through these huge lifechanges.
Now, spoiler alert at the endthe family has essentially moved
all of their belongings out ofthe house and the buyers of
their home back out, becausethey found a house that they
loved more.
Now I know from a real estateperspective we're like I'm not
(03:51):
having my client move out of ahouse when the closing is not
completely firm.
But you know, shit happens andsometimes buyers get cold feet
and they don't care if they losetheir earnest money deposit.
So in the case of this episode,I mean it's just emotional
roller coaster.
I am left in absolute tears.
At the end, bandit, the dadgets the message that the deal
(04:18):
falls through.
There's this beautiful scene ofhim tearing out the for sale
sign and throwing it, basicallyindicating he's not going to be
taking this job and that they'restaying.
Chili, just like jumps on topof him and is so incredibly
happy.
And then Bluey and Bingo rollback into that empty house where
(04:38):
all their stuff was gone.
But you can just tell, everyonewas so incredibly happy to not
be moving.
And even though they didn't move, I still think that it just
highlights the impact thatmoving has on people.
So I really want to get intothe lessons that I took away
(05:02):
from this episode, and I know itseems silly, but this show is
just so good and this episode inparticular is just so relatable
to our jobs as real estateagents.
I also think that there is alsoa more beautiful message of we
just have to have faith thatthings are working out the way
that they need to.
(05:22):
And I don't know about you, butI feel like when I'm working
with clients, a lot of the timesI say what's meant to be is
meant to be, and it will be Likeif the condo documents prove to
be a total disaster and youdon't want to buy.
What's meant to be is meant tobe.
So there are a lot of things Iwant to get into, but the main
(05:46):
things are here's what I feellike are the real estate
parallels with this episode?
I feel like.
There are a lot of emotionallayers of buying or selling a
home.
We can absolutely experienceuncertainty and setbacks and
then we ultimately just have tohave faith that things are
working out for the best.
(06:06):
As long as we are doing thebest we can and we're doing our
job, what's meant to be is goingto be, and we just sometimes
have to let go and just letthings play out.
Let's dive into the emotionallayers of buying or selling a
home.
Just like the Healer family,our clients are often juggling
(06:28):
huge life changes when they'rebuying or selling a home.
We have new jobs, relocations,there's family milestones like
the birth of a family, or maybeeven just letting go of a family
home, and it's not always happy, right.
Sometimes there's sad emotions,sometimes there's grief, even
if a move could be happy.
So we have divorce, we havesomebody who's passed away.
(06:51):
I think a lot of the times weforget that we are dealing with
some of the most raw aspects ofhumanity and I really feel like
a great real estate agent issuch a good shepherd and such a
good space holder for people andtheir emotions.
(07:12):
I know that that's not in thejob description technically, but
from my 20 years of being inreal estate.
The best real estate agentshold space for their clients and
their big emotions withouttaking it on themselves, without
taking things personally, and Ithink that that's such an
(07:33):
important piece of being a greatreal estate agent is being able
to set that boundary of.
I know you're having bigfeelings right now and I'm here
for you.
I think becoming a parentreally helped me with this.
I don't think I was really goodat it before I became a mom,
and I'm not saying that you haveto have kids to learn how to do
this, but I do think thatknowing which feelings are yours
(07:58):
and which are your clients is areally really good life skill,
and having that discernment isreally important.
The next thing is theuncertainty and setbacks.
We are dealing with people andprocesses and as much as we want
to control things, make surethings go smoothly, there's
always uncertainty and there areoftentimes setbacks.
(08:20):
Deals can fall through,timelines can shift and
unexpected challenges inevitablyarise.
And, just like in this Blueyepisode, it's not just about the
logistics of real estate.
It's not about oh, we had allour contingencies waived or
cleared and then that persondidn't buy the home.
(08:42):
It's really about how thosechanges are impacting your
client's emotions and theirsense of security.
Great real estate agents aregoing to be masters at setting
expectations and really layingout how the process should go
ideally.
But we also have to be able toexplain to our clients that
(09:04):
things can go wrong.
We can't control everything,which I know is hard.
We act like risk managers inreal estate, which is a really
great reason to hire a realestate agent to make sure that
things go as right as possibleor increases the chances of
things going right and gettingto closing with minimal hiccups.
But I also think we need to bea steadying presence in the face
(09:26):
of uncertainty or setbacks andreally not being reactive and
helping clients process ouremotions while keeping that
bigger picture in focus.
So again, going back to holdingspace, being steady and really
just making sure that you'redoing everything you can to
(09:48):
manage that uncertainty andthose setbacks when they arise.
One of my biggest pet peeves iswhen agents tell their clients
that something's going wrongwithout having solutions to the
problem.
So I don't think we should hideanything or lie to our clients.
But let's say I get a call andI'm representing the buyer and
(10:12):
the listing agent lets me knowthat the basement has flooded, I
am not going to turn around andcall my client to tell them
that the basement has flooded.
First of not going to turnaround and call my client to
tell them that the basement hasflooded, first of all, it's not
even their house yet, so it'sreally not their problem.
But I want to know how is thisissue getting solved so I can
then go to my client with whatthe solution to that problem is.
(10:34):
So I'm going to give thelisting agent and the seller
some time to line up ServPro,figure out why the basement
flooded, remedy the situation orat least get a game plan in
place so then I can communicateto my client hey, something bad
happened, the basement flooded,but here's the game plan.
(10:54):
The same goes for deliveringnews to the other side of the
transaction.
So, for example, for deliveringnews to the other side of the
transaction.
So, for example, if your clienthas a setback in their
financing, you're representingthe buyer, delivering news to
the listing agent that yourclient's having a setback.
That's not great communication,that's not managing those
(11:15):
setbacks.
Well, you need to have asolution and it needs to be a
win-win for both sides.
And again, we don't have toimmediately deliver it as soon
as we hear it, let's processthat setback and let's come up
with solutions and informationand a plan of attack that's
(11:36):
going to help our client feelbetter and also help them feel
like you're doing a great jobmanaging that process.
The last thing and I know forsome of you this might seem a
little like woo-woo, but Ireally truly believe what's
meant to be is supposed to be.
In the 20 years I've beenselling real estate, I've never
(11:59):
had somebody end up with thehouse that they weren't supposed
to have.
So I know it can be hard whenclients miss out on deals.
We lose in multiple offers.
Maybe something blows up oncethey're under contract.
But I really believe thatwhatever's meant to be is is
meant to be.
I've had situations where aclient goes under contract,
(12:22):
something is super wrong withthe house, we can't come to
terms on negotiation items andwe cancel the contract in.
The client literally lost theirjob two days later.
So I really feel like that wasdefinitely the best thing to
happen.
They ultimately weren't in aposition to purchase that home
and that home inspection was agreat easy out for them.
(12:44):
So we didn't have to go throughfinancing contingency and all
of that stuff.
So sometimes it's hard, but I dothink we have to let go of
control and just trust thatthings are working out for the
best.
So I know that when a dealfalls through or plans change
especially if you need thatclosing, you need that money it
(13:06):
can feel devastating in themoment, but I know in my heart
that those moments often lead tosomething better down the road
and clients can smell commissionbreath.
Commission breath is the worstthing you can have.
So we just have to release thatcontrol and just have faith
that things are going to workout.
To recap this section we asreal estate agents need to be
(13:31):
really great at dealing with theemotions of buying and selling
a home, dealing with thoseuncertainty and those setbacks
and then ultimately just havingfaith that what's meant to be is
meant to be.
Now I want to dig a little bitdeeper into building empathy in
your real estate business,because I think empathy is one
of those emotional intelligencetools that makes a great real
(13:55):
estate agent being able to putyourself in your client's shoes
and really understand how thismove or sale is impacting them
or this purchase is impactingthem.
The first step, I think, is justunderstanding where your
clients are coming from.
What is their emotional journeythroughout this transaction?
(14:16):
So, like the Healers and Bluey,they were saying goodbye to a
home full of memories.
That house didn't justrepresent a house for them.
That was a home full ofmemories for them.
I also think they were feelinglike nervous about moving to an
unknown place and maybe mourningthe loss of their future that
(14:36):
they thought they were going tohave in this house.
It can be a emotional rollercoaster.
My preteen daughter and I liketo call, when we're feeling all
the feels, rainbow chameleon.
So I think that real estatetransactions can often be so
rainbow chameleon, like we haveall the feels.
And the thing is our clientsprocess these emotions
(14:57):
differently.
Every person processes emotionsdifferently.
Some people are more outwardlyprocessing, some people are
internally processing.
So I don't think we need to betherapists that's not our job.
I do think we need to have someemotional intelligence in
understanding how are ourclients feeling, and it is okay
to ask them that.
I actually think that's areally human thing to do.
(15:17):
It's such a nice thing to do,like how are our clients feeling
, and it is okay to ask themthat.
I actually think that's areally human thing to do.
It's such a nice thing to do,like how are you feeling about
this move?
What a powerful question to askyour clients, and I don't think
a lot of agents are asking thatquestion.
I think that gives you a lot ofgood understanding to where
they're coming from, which isI'm excited, I'm nervous, I'm
(15:38):
feeling really sad.
I also think that's anopportunity to step in and give
them an amazing experience.
You might be able to go aboveand beyond for them.
So maybe there's a home full ofmemories and they were marking
the height of all their kids ontheir door jam.
Maybe you go in and you prythat door jam off and you just
(16:02):
replace it.
You have a handy person come inand just do that and then
you're able to gift them thatdoor jam that has all of their
kids measurements on it.
So, looking for thoseopportunities to have an
emotional connection with yourclient and have maybe a
meaningful opportunity todeliver an amazing client
experience, just keep your eyesopen to that.
(16:23):
I don't think we need to hidefrom the emotions of the
experience.
I actually think we can usethem to deliver a better
experience and buildrelationships.
I also want to talk about somepractical ways that you can show
empathy.
I think being present andreally actively listening is
such a key to understanding whatyour client's concerns and
(16:44):
emotions are.
Again, asking good questionsand not shying away from
understanding how they'refeeling about things, because
sometimes it just feels good tobe listened to.
Sometimes our clients just needto vent, especially in
situations where they're feelinglike things are out of control
(17:04):
or that they're reallyemotionally heightened.
The next way that you can showempathy is just to reassure them
.
I think, as humans, we all wantto be reassured that things are
going to be okay.
So when setbacks happen, remindthem that we're going to do
what we can do in order to getthings back on track.
(17:24):
But sometimes there's justthings that are out of our
control.
But I'm here to guide youtowards the right solution and
what's best for you.
Hopefully will be successful inselling your home or buying
this home.
The other thing is just offersolutions that really take into
account their best interests.
So I think with clients, theyalways want to feel like you're
(17:48):
on their side.
So that's another way that wecan show empathy is that not
only do we understand them, butwe're on the same team, and
that's something I like toremind clients throughout the
process is that it's not weunderstand them, but we're on
the same team and that'ssomething I like to remind
clients throughout the processis that it's not me against you,
against the listing agent,against the seller.
You and I are on the same team.
So what you want and what yourend goal are, that's the most
(18:08):
important thing to me.
We are team get this house orteam, sell this house.
And then, lastly, I think again,we just need to trust the
process.
You can only control what youcan control and I know we want
to control everything, but youcan only do so much and it is
hard when things fall apart.
(18:30):
I know I personally take somuch responsibility for
something that doesn't go wellor falls apart on me, but
sometimes it's a little biteasier to accept that defeat of
maybe a deal getting canceledwhen I know that I did the best
I could, when I know that Itried to account for all of the
(18:51):
things that could go wrong andanything that was in my control
I managed, managed.
So definitely make sure thatthere's a bit of just trusting
the process, but do what you canto control what you can control
and then you kind of have torelease the rest and not worry
about it too much, or elseyou're just going to be wracked
with anxiety and worry, which isnot a fun place to be in.
(19:13):
I really encourage all of you togo watch that Bluey season
finale.
I dare you to watch it withoutcrying at the end.
It is just so heartbreaking.
It definitely pulls at yourheartstrings and my kids laugh
at me Actually, no, mynine-year-old cries with me, but
(19:34):
then everyone else looks at melike I'm crazy.
But it is so good.
Please watch it.
But it is a great reminder ofall the emotional layers
involved in a move, in a homesale, and that it's so
complicated.
It involves emotions, itinvolves big moves, it just it's
so great.
I love it so much.
It also teaches us theimportance of having faith in
(19:58):
the process and that you have tostay grounded in the moment and
just show up with empathy andcompassion when things get tough
or even when they don't Justhave empathy and compassion,
because this is a big deal forour clients and it's so often we
forget that Real estate is somuch more than houses.
It is truly about our clientsand their stories, and being
(20:22):
that steady presence that yourclients need can absolutely help
them navigate the logistics andthe emotions of their buying or
selling journey.
And ultimately, I just want youto remember that setbacks are
going to happen.
Nobody's perfect.
We are dealing with verycomplex situations, oftentimes
(20:48):
Even when shit totally hits thefan.
Usually things are working outfor everyone's higher good, even
if that path isn't clear rightaway.
So thank you for listening tothis maybe somewhat
unconventional episode of HappyAgent Co.
But I just had to jump onbecause this was fresh in my
mind and I thought that it wouldbe a fun little break from the
norm.
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