Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Oh we could, we could
fly.
Welcome back to have a Cup ofJohnny.
This season isn't abouthustling harder.
It's about coming home toyourself, to your voice, to your
breath, to the quiet truth thatyou're still here and you're
not starting over.
You're starting again.
(00:21):
This is your space to reflect,reset and remember who, to tell
you why.
So pour your cafecito and let'sbegin.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Hey friends, and
welcome back to have a Cup of
Johnny podcast.
Have a Cup of Johnny podcast.
This is a very early recordingfor me and you all are in for a
treat because this is a veryfresh reflection that I have had
(00:57):
.
So the month of August islessons learned during my year
of being 43 years old.
August is my birthday month andI celebrate, with big or small
celebrations, the entire month,because I see not just my
birthday but everyone's birthdayas a perfect celebration to
(01:22):
have, because I think of it as avery special day that all the
stars needed to be aligned injust the right way for this
person to come into this worldand to be the person that they
are.
So for me, birthdays arespecial, so that's why I do that
.
I celebrate it all month long,celebrated all month long, and
(01:48):
because of that, I wanted tohave this theme during the month
of August here in the year ofour Lord, 2025.
And this fresh thoughtreflection that I had happened
this very morning.
I woke up not too long ago.
You may hear it in my voice.
Nevertheless, it's day nine ofmy 75-day soft joa challenge and
(02:13):
you've heard me talk about itin social media.
This is a hybrid ormodification of the 75-day hard
challenge that you may see overthere.
Some are fitness-centric,others, like the ones that I've
seen, are writing orauthorship-centric or content
creation-centric, and I modifiedmine, of course, to be more
(02:36):
about what can propel me forward.
So it's joa-centric, which iswhy I call it the 75-day soft
joa challenge.
But today I got a confession tomake with you all.
I didn't want to get up thismorning, not in a lazy way, not
even in an I need more sleepkind of way.
(02:57):
But my first thought, before Ieven fully opened my eyes, was
how am I supposed to keep doingthis challenge when I'm off from
work?
I took four days off from workso that way I can fully
celebrate my actual birthday,and I love it.
I love it.
I came back to my home in ElPaso.
(03:18):
You know I'm here, I'mrecording from here.
This is my safe space, my haven, so I love it.
But I woke up thinking that,like, how am I supposed to keep
doing this challenge when I'moff from work?
Followed quickly, very quickly,by can I just pause it?
(03:41):
Now, old me would have takenthat thought and run with it
like run with it Pause,rationalize it away, delayed,
but instead this time I gotcurious because I've learned
something through a lot ofjournaling and painful
self-honesty, and that is thatwhich I resist the most is
(04:05):
usually what I most need to do.
It was painful to even say itout loud.
But let's talk about resistance.
I've noticed this pattern inmyself over and over again and
(04:26):
you've heard me say that I am arecovering procrastinator,
because early on in my late 20sand early 30s I figured out that
this is something that will bea work in progress for me,
something that I will continueto battle and tackle, that it
will never like freely or trulygo away from my psyche.
(04:48):
So that's why I say like I'm arecovering procrastinator,
because I'm always battling thatpause, that postponement.
Nevertheless, you know, I'venoticed this pattern that
whenever I start to dreadsomething, push against it or
find myself inventing excuses.
That's a complete red flag, andnot because I'm lazy or
(05:15):
incapable of doing the thing,but because my brain has been
wired to see postponement asprotection.
And that goes to rejection,trauma and not having adults
around me that I could count on.
So I had to do a lot of thingsmyself.
(05:35):
I'm hyper independent andthings of that nature.
So I understand the origin ofwhy I am the way that I am and I
cannot delete my past, but Ican move forward with new tools
so that way I can be a betterversion of myself, regardless of
(05:56):
what happened in my past.
So that's why I journal a lot,I take pauses and have been
doing a lot of introspectivekind of work within myself
because of things like this, ofthe actions that I do, because
of what happened in the past.
(06:16):
But now that I've graduallybecome more self-aware since I
started working on myself in myearly 30s, really all the way up
until now, and that issomething that I know about
myself that because my brain hasbeen wired to see postponement
as protection, I do these kindof things.
(06:37):
I tell myself if I wait tostart, I can't fail.
If I don't finish, I won't bejudged, if I delay I stay safe.
Except, I'm not really safe.
Am I?
What I really am is stuck, andthat's the self-aware part of me
(06:59):
coming in and really dissectingthese thoughts that I have and
correcting those thoughts.
You see, and that's thedifference, because postponement
might shield me from temporarydiscomfort.
I mean that is very true.
Me from temporary discomfort.
(07:21):
I mean that is very true, itdoes shield me from temporary
discomfort in the moment.
It makes me feel good, right,but then it brings anxiety.
I know that.
But the most egregious thingthat postponement does for me is
that it robs me of my long-termgrowth.
And very recently, yesterday, Iwas watching Busy Blooming, one
(07:42):
of their podcast episodes.
I love it, it motivates me, soI've been watching it quite a
lot for the past week, so happyI stumbled upon it.
Highly recommend it, especiallyif you're into content creation
and things of that nature, ifyou just want a nice pep talk
and seeing someone flourish andsomeone doing things and still
(08:06):
taking care of themselves.
Not doing things for the sakeof burnout, but doing things
while still taking care of theirwhole mind, body and soul.
Watch Busy Blooming whole mind,body and soul.
I watched Busy Blooming and shesays something in there that hit
me.
I noticed the emotions kind ofpulsing starting in my chest and
(08:28):
I knew that something was there.
So of course you know I have tothink about it and all of that.
But what she said was I'vealways known how to play the
long game, something to that.
But I know she said long game.
I was like huh, I was like howgood you know of her to have had
(08:48):
this ability to be able to playthe long game.
That's to me.
I find that to be rare.
But I find it rare because Ihaven't had that ability to play
the long game.
For most of my life I've beenplaying the survival game.
(09:10):
What can I do now to survivethe moment?
And I've been stuck in that.
It's kind of like I equate itto the mind living paycheck to
paycheck, you know, as opposedto putting something away for
later.
That's what I equate it to, andhearing her say that pushed me
(09:34):
to think about that and to thinkhow I haven't been playing the
long game, but how I could playthe long game, you know, because
, once again, like I acknowledgemy past, I acknowledge what it
did, what it may have robbed meof back then, but I also know
that I'm very capable, you know,of turning things around as I
have proven myself to do, youknow, and I'm also very capable
(09:56):
of crafting a future that iscompletely not aligned with how
I grew up with, a future that iswhat I envision myself in,
being my best self.
I'm also very aware that I'mcapable of doing that.
So when I heard her say that Iwas very happy that she's
(10:18):
capable of doing that, but italso challenged me to work on
myself so that way I am able toalso play the long game.
And when I had this thoughttoday, that phrase got into my
head.
And it's so weird how I putthings together through memory
(10:43):
and experience.
And I hate to divert from thisconversation, but I want you all
to read my books and read theOrdinary Bruja, because this is
very much how I craft mycharacters.
You see them coming up withthings and how they come up with
and it's very much the same waythat I'm explaining here,
through memory, experience andsomething that pushed them,
(11:06):
something that they encounter, aphrase, a smell, something that
kind of challenged them.
And to me that challenge wasI've always known how to play
the long game.
That phrase that I heard in theBusy Blooming podcast was and
then that stayed in the back ofmy mind is fresh first thing in
the morning I'm a morning person.
(11:48):
That phrase, it was like apuzzle.
It got into the groove alongwith that thought and then along
with the last piece of thepuzzle, which was my awareness,
bringing it all together and Iwas able to understand that for
(12:09):
me to play the long game, I haveto combat those thoughts of
postponement.
You know, for me to play thelong game, I got to make sure
and be very aware, verycognizant of when these thoughts
come into my head to prod me,prop me, entice me to postpone
(12:34):
something.
And I'm glad I rationalized itthis morning in a logical manner
and I was like wait a minute,joah, when something is good for
you, you tend to postpone it.
So just knowing that you wantto postpone this, that should
let you know that this issomething that you must do.
(12:54):
That is very important for yourself-growth and I think for me
that's the answer.
The answer For me to startplaying the long game is to do
the thing that I want topostpone, do the thing that I
dread the most, because thatwhich I dread is something that
(13:18):
is good for me, is somethingthat I need to do.
You see, and it's verypervasive, this resistance, it
bubbled up, it was like a voicetelling me you don't have to do
the challenge today.
No one will know, you deserve abreak.
It's enticing, it is soenticing.
(13:38):
It is almost like have y'allwatched Sandman?
Sandman, watch Sandman and thendesire, desire, yeah, that's.
That's kind of like how itmanifests inside my head, kind
of like that, oh, that voicethat, just like you deserve a
break, joanne, you deserve topostpone this.
(13:59):
No one will know.
Go ahead and do it, but I knewbetter.
Go ahead and do it, but I knewbetter.
Thankfully, I knew better.
Thankfully I have becomeself-aware enough and have grown
enough to know better and I wasable to turn that around this
morning because I understoodthat this wasn't about rest,
(14:20):
that it was about sabotage,dressed in self-care clothing.
And now the 75 Days SoftChallenge, or I should say the
75 Days Soft Joa Challenge,isn't about doing things
perfectly not at all.
I already took that off of thatplate.
It's about showing up formyself gently and consistently,
(14:46):
and the truth is I struggle withconsistency.
It's about showing up formyself gently and consistently,
and the truth is I struggle withconsistency, and not because I
don't care, but because there isa part of me that's still
afraid of what happens if Iactually follow through, what
happens if I finish the draft,if I stick to the routine, if I
(15:06):
succeed, because then there areexpectations and visibility and
potential rejection thatnaturally come through all of
this.
So I pause or pivot or perfect,but I'm learning to catch that
urge in the moment and pushthrough instead of away from it.
(15:29):
You know what I'm saying.
This morning I told myself theresistance is the assignment.
That's how you play the longgame, joa.
So I got up, brushed my teeth,drank my water, took my vitamins
, moved my body, did my gratefuljournaling and chose myself.
(15:55):
Because you know what, in thedays that I'm off, it is even
more important for me to followmy routine, because it brings me
freedom, it brings me peace, itbrings me the structure that I
need to tackle everything, evenif it is just tackling
(16:18):
celebration or tackling a mallouting or tackling a hike.
So let me ask you this, besoswhat are you resisting right now
?
Is there something in your lifeyou've been putting off, not
because it doesn't matter, butbecause it matters so much that
(16:38):
it scares you?
What's the one thing you'vetold yourself you'll do when the
time is just right?
And what if the resistanceisn't a stop sign, but a signal,
a flashlight pointing towardthe next version of you waiting
(16:59):
to emerge?
Think about that.
Hey, I want to thank you all forsitting with me today.
This was a little rough for me.
It was hard to admit.
It's the kind of honesty thatis needed, but I still feel
rough around the edges when Ihave to let it out of my mouth.
(17:20):
So I want to thank you forbeing here with me.
This challenge, this soft joachallenge, is teaching me hard
truths, but I'm here for itbecause I'm tired of getting in
my own way, and if you'rewalking through this too, I hope
today's episode reminds youthat you're not alone, that
(17:41):
resistance is normal and it'salso beatable.
I'd love to hear from you.
What are you resisting?
Tag me or send me a message athaveacupofjoannie on Instagram
or threads On TikTok.
It's a little different.
It's a cup of joe, underscoreh-a-n-n-y.
(18:04):
And hey, if you're craving astory that reflects this very
journey of reclaiming power andpushing past fear, pre-order the
Ordinary Bruja athaveacupofjoanniecom, because
fiction can be a mirror too.
Until next time, stay soft,stay ready and, as always, let's
(18:27):
have a cup Bye.
Speaker 1 (18:29):
Have a cup of
Johannycom for more stories,
blog posts and the books thatstarted it all.
Thank you for being here.
Until next time, be soft, bebold and always have a cup of
(18:57):
Johanny.