The Healing Power of Stillness

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Have you ever felt that sinking feeling of anxiety when things aren't going as planned? That's exactly what happened to me at Latina Fest, standing at my author table watching people walk by without glancing at my books. My stomach tightened as those insidious thoughts crept in: "Maybe I won't sell anything today. This was a waste of time."

But then something magical happened – a microsecond of perfect stillness descended, slowing my perception of everything around me. Suddenly, I noticed the joy permeating the festival – the music, the laughter, the community celebrating together. A voice inside whispered, "Wait, this is perfect just the way it is." The revelation transformed my experience: the accomplishment wasn't in selling books but in being present, in feeling the joy of community. When I released my attachment to outcome and embraced the moment, I started smiling and dancing by my table. People began to notice, wave, and approach me to learn more about my work.

This episode explores a counterintuitive truth: sometimes stillness isn't a pause in your healing – it IS the healing. After completing my emotionally demanding "Why Behind the Bruja" miniseries, I found myself in a quiet emptiness that felt uncomfortable for someone who thrives on productivity. Yet that discomfort held an invaluable lesson: I had been moving too fast, meticulously crafting my message while forgetting to leave room for myself in the process. What if the real power isn't in perpetual motion but in the courage to stand still?

Where in your life might stillness offer you clarity that constant motion cannot? Where are you rushing when you could be noticing? Before you push harder, consider whether softening might be the braver choice. Share this episode with someone who needs permission to be still, and message me about what resonated with you. Remember, stillness isn't weakness – it's sacred.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Oh we could, we could fly.
Welcome back to have a Cup ofJohnny.
This season isn't abouthustling harder.
It's about coming home toyourself, to your voice, to your
breath, to the quiet truth thatyou're still here and you're
not starting over, you'restarting again.

(00:21):
This is your space to reflect,reset and remember who, to tell
you why.
So pour your cafecito and let'sbegin.
Hello everyone, and welcomeback to have a Cup of Johnny.

(00:43):
Podcast.
The podcast where we talk aboutthe messy, magical and
sometimes soul-rattling lessonslife teaches us, whether we're
ready for them or not.
This month's theme becausewe're in June right now, vasitos
is the quiet power of returningto yourself, is the quiet power
of returning to yourself.

(01:04):
But today I want to flip thatjust a little, because sometimes
hear me out here the real powerisn't in returning, it's in
standing still.
So hear what I want to offer toyou in this first episode.

(01:27):
What if stillness isn't a pausein your healing?
What if it is the healing?
And I'm not talking aboutpeaceful spa day, although I
love that, but that's not whatI'm talking about here.

(01:50):
It's more of a kind ofstillness.
Let me explain it.
Hopefully I'm going to do itjustice.
I'm talking about the kind ofstillness that shows up like a
full body exhale after your soulsays, hey, that's enough.

(02:16):
And that was me after I finishedthe why Behind the Bruja
miniseries last month.
It was raw, I gave everything.
It was like cracking myselfwide open and explaining why I
wrote that book in the way thatI did the various rewrites in
that book.
It was very personal.
It took everything I hademotionally and when I ended
that series in May it didn'tfeel productive, it didn't feel

(02:41):
accomplished.
Instead, it just it felt superquiet, not defeated, but like I
put out so much, I poured out somuch that I was just like and
just still.
And that stillness had somethings to say.

(03:03):
But when you're someone like methat thrives on productivity
and that is something that I'mstill working on how to go away
from that a little?
That stillness told me that Ihad been moving fast, too fast,

(03:23):
trying to get the story justright, the message tight, the
motion clear, and that's good.
Right, it's good.
Being detailed, it's good.
But it also told me I hadn'tleft room for me in the middle
of it.
You know, and that's whatstillness does it whispers the

(03:47):
things that we like.
Bulldoze past it for the sakeof getting it done, for the sake
of productivity.
It holds the lesson that can'tbe learned while we're rushing,
while we're doing right.
So for me, the stillness taughtme like you're not broken,

(04:10):
You're just tired, you don'tneed to push harder, you need to
soften a little, and y'all knowhow hard it is to soften when
the world wants you sharp andmoving and productive.
That's very hard to do, but Iwant to tell you what happened,

(04:34):
because I allowed that bit ofstillness to come through.
And I don't want to soundwoo-woo, right, but it's kind of
magical and I wish this foreveryone.
And you'll know when you hitthat kind of like stillness,
even if it is a microsecond, andthe best thing that I can

(04:56):
describe it is my first timeactually getting meditation
quote unquote right when Ifinally went to a peaceful state
, but it was only like for amicrosecond, if that.
But it was so profound, themoment was so profound.

(05:17):
That is something that I willalways remember, even though it
was short lived, you know.
So I hope that makes sense.
So that's how you know that youfound that inner peace, that
stillness, that moment, becauseyour mind captures it, even if
it was just for a microsecond,like it happened to me at the

(05:47):
Latina Fest, and I believe thatmoment happened because I
stopped assigning value to myproductivity and chose instead
to be present in the moment.
And before I forget about thisand just start talking about the
moment, let me just take apause right here and let y'all
know that the Power of Now is agreat book that describes this.
I've read that book.
I'm going to need to rereadthat book, but that is one of

(06:08):
those books that kind of likealtered the way that I think
about things.
But that book does a great jobof explaining what stillness is
and how you can learn and teachyourself little by little to be
more in the present.
All right, okay, but let's goback to I'm still a little horse

(06:32):
from the Latina Fest, but let'sgo back to Sunday.
It was the Latina Fest at GrandPark downtown LA, and I went
through a little hurdle ofgetting my table ready because
it was a bit of like, should yoube in this table or not, with

(06:55):
another author there.
So I went to the people runningit and I got clarification from
them and then I had them comewith me so that way they can
validate that you know that wasthe table I was supposed to use,
me and another author, anotherchildren's author as well.
So, of course, you know, myheart is racing.

(07:16):
I'm already like biting into mytime like 10 minutes just doing
that because I need to, youknow, get my table set up and
things of that nature.
And, mind you, I will say likea whole 10 minutes prior and
everything, I did the rightthing and all of that, but I
still needed to do that oneextra step because of the of the

(07:37):
conflict and table.
So I kind of like woosah out ofthat one right.
And I was there just standingnext to my table with my books
and I noticed that a lot ofpeople was just walking by, but
it wasn't because the table wasat a bad placement.
On the contrary, the table wasin a great placement because it

(08:00):
was through traffic goingthrough there, right.
So everybody that came throughthe Latina Fest would have had
to walk through the author'stable and it was two tables
right there and I was like, okay, this is a great placement,
right.
But then I started to noticethat people were just beelining

(08:20):
and instead of looking towardstheir left, they were more
looking towards the stage,towards the right or looking at
the other vendors and things ofthat nature.
And this thought just creptthrough my head and it's very
insidious the way that thesethoughts that could potentially
make you spiral go through yourhead.

(08:42):
They're quick thoughts thatcould potentially make you
spiral go through your head.
They're quick, they are quick,they're like that enemy, that
little devil on your shoulderright, and this thought just
came through and it was likemaybe I won't sell anything
today.
And it's like this feeling thatoccurs as soon as that thought
comes in in my stomach.
It's like my stomach dropsright.

(09:04):
And if you read any of my books, you will see that I put this
feeling on my characters quite alot when something bad happens
or when they're getting anxiety.
And that's because I feel it.
I feel anxiety very much in mystomach.
It just it's right there, mystomach clenches, it feels like
it drops.
It's like this sinking feelingthat starts there and it just

(09:27):
goes up to my throat where Ifeel like I'm suffocating.
I can't breathe if I allow itto like, grow in me, you know.
And I, as soon as I thought thatmaybe I won't sell a damn book
today, and my eyes dartedtowards my family that were
there looking at me, being soproud of me.

(09:48):
And then I felt that feeling ofjudgment, that feeling of being
challenged, that feeling offailing and for a split second
my stomach tightened and I feltthis sinking feeling and I felt

(10:08):
the spiral of anxiety start todrag inside of me and that came
with the thought of this was awaste of time, I'm going to fail
miserably.
Why did I even make such aneffort to come over here?
But then something elsehappened.
It was this microsecond, just amicrosecond.

(10:33):
I wasn't there for that longbecause there was a lot of
people there.
But this microsecond ofstillness showed up and I
remember everything just wentvery slow, you know, like my
environment just slowed down forthat bit of time that I was
there, and just like thatinsidious voice of I'm not going

(10:56):
to sell a damn book.
Why did I even come?
Showed up.
Then another one showed up aswell.
Hold up.
It said, wait a minute.
And it was like this hand on myshoulder, right of this being
that showed up and slowedeverything down.
So I can see it and I want tocry just thinking about this

(11:19):
moment, because that's howpowerful these moments are and I
can't wait for y'all to feel it, but it was like everything
slowed down.
I noticed how joyful people were, I noticed the community, I
noticed the smiles, I noticedthe music, the singing around me

(11:41):
.
I noticed people talking to oneanother, loving on one another,
and I was like, wait, no, thisis perfect, just the way it is.
I am here and I am so gratefulto be here.
You know, and it just clickedon me, you know, that I am in a

(12:05):
perfect spot right now to feeljoy.
And when that dawned on me, Iallowed myself to feel the joy
that was happening around me.
You know, because that was it.
The accomplishment was beingthere, and I allowed the other

(12:29):
voice, for a bit, to harass meinto thinking that the joy was
in being there and sharing inthis joy that was so readily
around me With Latinos, witheveryone else that was there,

(12:52):
just celebrating Latino culture,you know.
And within that stillness, Imade that choice.
You know that theaccomplishment was in being
there.
The sun was out, music wasplaying, my community was all
around me.

(13:13):
So I started smiling, I starteddancing in place next to my

(13:43):
table, just letting the musichit me, just right, and people
looked and people waved and Iwaved back and one person
scanned my QR code and I askedher to make sure that she looks
at the landing page and sheshowed it to me on her phone and

(14:03):
she was like, oh, I'm doing itjust now.
And in that moment it was likethis is it, this is community.
This is why I'm here to sharein my joy with others, you know,
to allow others to share intheir joy with me.
And that stillness helped me torealign my goal right then and

(14:25):
there, that it didn't need it tobe in selling books, but to be
present and okay, even if no onebought a single thing.
And listen, I am gratefulbeyond words that I don't depend
on book sales to pay my bills.

(14:46):
I know that other authors do so, I am very cognizant of that,
but maybe, just maybe I'm notsaying that this is the end, all
to be all, but hear me outmaybe for those that depend on

(15:08):
vendor sales to pay their bills,maybe stillness is a way, right
, that can give the ability todrop the outcome and become part
of that moment.
That can give the ability todrop the outcome and become part
of that moment, and when youbecome part of that moment, it

(15:34):
can help that person trying tosell, to be kind of like a
magnet to others to come to themor to feel good about coming to
them so they can hear moreabout their products Coming to
them so they can hear more abouttheir products.
You know, because I wasthinking about that and I was
very grateful that I don'tdepend on the book sales, that I
can do that so readily infinding peace, even in moments

(15:59):
of anxiety, right, and ofcounterproductive thoughts and
things of that nature, right.
Because here's what happenedafter I let go of that, like I
said, I smiled.
More People waved, looked at meas opposed to just looking

(16:19):
straight at the stage.
A few, too, came to ask aboutthe books, you know, and they
didn't buy it.
But I got to talk about IslaDelgado and her story.
It gave me back my joy while Inot because you're pushing
something, but because you'represent, you know you're there

(17:06):
and it's something about aperson that is present, that is
soaking in their environment,that it just makes other people
boom looks towards them, youknow, boom looks towards them,
you know, and it may help youattract customers, you know, you
never know, give it a try, Idon't know.

(17:26):
So, before I leave you, here'syour reflection that I want you
to do for this week, and it'sthis where in your life can
stillness help you shift yourmindset without needing to
change your circumstances?
Let that sit with you.
And if you're in a season whereyou feel like things aren't

(17:49):
moving fast enough or successisn't showing up loud enough,
what if the lesson is simply topause and be in that moment?
That might be the momenteverything starts to change.
Think about it.
If this episode gave yousomething clarity, calmness or

(18:15):
just a reminder to stop grippingso tight, share it with a
friend, message me.
I want to hear what you'relearning too.
And until next time, basitos,stillness isn't weakness, it's
sacred.
Talk to you soon, bye.

(18:38):
If today's episode spoke to you, share with somebody who's
finding their way back too, andif you haven't yet, visit
haveacupofjoanniecom for morestories, blog posts and the bits
that started it all.
Thank you for being here.
Until next time, be soft, boldand always have a cup of John.