Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello and welcome
back to the Healthy Living
Podcast.
I'm your host, joe Grumbine,and today we're going to talk
about perspective and health.
And I think that, as I'mlooking for answers and looking
for truths, these simple,simplistic looking for truths,
(00:31):
these simplistic approaches areless and less valuable.
And I remember there was an oldsaying that I can I don't know
if it was on a t-shirt or acoffee mug or something and it
said you can't change the past,but you can ruin the present by
worrying about the future.
And I think the lesson of thatwas, you know, to be present and
(00:53):
mindful and all of that.
And in thinking about it and asI've been studying the routes
to the truth and approaches andthoughts and, at the same time,
dealing with this pendingencroaching tumor on my neck and
(01:14):
thinking about things like, wow, am I going to have a voice in
a week?
Am I going to be able tobreathe in a week?
All of these things, you know,the future comes up a little bit
and, even though I believe, forthe most part, being present is
very, very important, I want totalk about what the past and
(01:38):
the present and the futurereally offer as tools to find
your health and find your truth.
And you know, looking at thepast, I think there's a lot of
value that comes from reflectionand learning from experiences.
(02:03):
Spending time, you know,meditating, doing energy, work
and things like that often putyou in touch with your past and
maybe things that you'veforgotten, maybe grief or
emotional closure, forgivingyourself or acknowledging that
(02:28):
you did a thing or didn't do athing.
You know, we bury so much inour past so that we don't have
to be plagued by it, and youknow it's definitely a coping
mechanism.
But at the same time, there's aplace where protecting yourself
from a trauma and keepingyourself from growing come
(02:51):
together.
And you know, as you becomefocused more on growth, um, you
end up having to tear some ofthese old scabs off, and the
only way you can do that is bylooking at the past.
And another thing is you knowyou can create closure sometimes
(03:13):
by going back, and you don'tnecessarily realize it, but you
leave a place open, sometimesfor a relationship when it's
already passed.
Maybe the person has passed onor maybe just both parties have
moved on with their lives, butyet there's still this
placeholder and, believe it ornot, every placeholder takes
(03:37):
energy.
As I'm learning, as my energyis being taxed and tapped and
you realize where it's comingfrom.
Even these words that I'mspeaking are taking energy, and
that's why I'm being careful andnot telling my story over and
over again.
And as we start to acknowledgethe truth about things, well,
(04:02):
all of a sudden, where we spendour time becomes more important.
Recognizing growth is anothervalue to the past.
You know, a lot of times whenwe stay so mindful and present I
know I'm guilty of this is I'mvery hard on myself and I want
to do better.
So I just always focused onokay, a little more, a little
(04:24):
more, a little more.
You know whether it's pushingmyself mentally, physically,
spiritually, whatever it is.
You know, wherever I am, it'salways well.
You know you need to go more,you need to go more, but once in
a while, if you take a stepback, you can say, wow, look,
how far I've come, and sothere's most definitely some
(04:44):
value to that Forgiveness andacceptance.
You know that's a place thatyou have to go, to the past.
If you're ever going to come tothat present moment of
forgiveness and acceptance.
You have to be able to sit withyour memory.
You have to be able to sit withyour actions and and truly
(05:11):
accept, acknowledge theresponsibility of your actions
and then switch over to thepresent and say you know, I know
this is who I was, I know thisis what I did, but here's who I
am now.
And I really think that there'sa tremendous value in being
(05:35):
able to step back into the pastfor moments and maybe finally uh
, you know learning lessons andsetting goals.
You know all the past.
You think about mistakes andyou think about, you know,
errors and things that I didwrong, but really what comes of
(05:56):
it is what are you doing aboutit?
Did you learn from it?
These are really the placewhere your growth can come from
and Sorry about that, I thinkthat really, the lessons of the
(06:24):
past, they translate right awayinto the present, but they only
can come from spending the timein the past.
Then we get into the presentand it's pretty apparent a lot
of the things by staying in thepresent.
(06:44):
Mindfulness is a very importantword of today and being present
.
Being mindful, it's more thanjust not daydreaming.
It's more than you know keepingyour eye on the moment, it's
(07:04):
engaging, it's focusing yourattention, and we've talked
about attention as the thingthat matters the most.
It's funny.
I received a text message fromone of my sisters and I know
I've maybe mentioned that youknow of all the people that have
(07:27):
been supportive in my life,especially as I'm going through
this cancer right now.
I haven't heard a goddang wordfrom my immediate family, and
it's okay.
You know, I've had to acceptthe fact that we don't have a
(07:48):
relationship, we don't know eachother, and there's a place
where you have to own that, andwhether it's good or bad or why
it happened really isn't theissue.
What is the issue is that it is, and I haven't talked to this
sister in more than 10 years, Ithink Maybe I talked to her when
(08:10):
my dad passed, I think almosteight years ago.
But you know, you think aboutsomebody you haven't talked to
in that long of time and,frankly, you don't know them
anymore.
And it's interesting because theway that she reached out to me
was like I don't go on socialmedia very often, but I saw
(08:34):
something your wife posted and Iheard you're battling cancer
and, you know, just want to sendyou love and light, and that
was what she had to say and Ididn't even answer.
I I sent her a little heartbecause of course I love her,
but I don't know her, I don'thave a relationship with her and
I'm not gonna spend any wordsand time trying to build
(09:00):
something that isn't right now,and not to say there isn't a
place for it.
I don't have any ill will ornegativity.
I just don't have energy to putinto a relationship that isn't.
And I think that's where livingin the present and being aware
of the past and being honestabout it, being honest about it,
(09:23):
so being mindful, definitely,you know, manages anxiety.
You know, if you're nottripping on the past, you're in
the now.
That's where the zone comesfrom.
You know.
They say you get yourself inthe zone.
Well, it's just being presentand you're not thinking about
where you were coming from orwhere you're headed.
You're just here, right now andyou can have the most dramatic
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performance if you can get andkeep yourself in that place and,
of course, all the things thatcome from managing anxiety, you
know you get a better mood, youcan lose depression, your blood
pressure can get better.
I mean it.
Just it goes on and on.
You know your focus increasesand then you create a positive
(10:13):
cascade, just like you know badhabits can create a negative
cascade you can really getyourself into a positive cascade
of one action, opens up a doorfor another action to be more
likely and you know you canreally move forward.
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Maybe one of the reallyimportant things is your
concentration improves as youstay in the present and I think
you lose sight ofprocrastination.
I think we procrastinatebecause we're busy thinking
about the future.
We don't just get into well,just get up and do it.
It's like well, tomorrow, thisand that.
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So easy to stay doing thenothing that you're doing and
put off the thing that youshould be doing.
But when you're living in thenow, all of a sudden that's not
so appealing.
You're like well, I need thisright now, or I can't have this
other thing, or whatever it is.
I think your communicationimproves Because you're not
(11:17):
spaced out.
How many of us have aconversation with somebody and
then you realize at one pointthis person isn't even fucking
listening to me.
They didn't even hear you.
Can you say that again?
You know you're like are youkidding me?
I really, and this is peoplethat you know and love, um, all
the time it happens.
And or, or you know you'll gothrough and explain a whole
(11:38):
thing and they'll come out of itand ask you a question that
tells you they didn't hear athing.
And so you know yourcommunication skills can improve
dramatically and even thequality of your time.
(12:01):
As you're living in the moment,your time passes in a relative
way and generally passes prettyquickly, but you're not stuck.
You know wishing, wondering,and you're not anxious about
what's going to happen.
So I think it's really yourquality of time improves and
maybe accepting the truth,accepting a situation, you know,
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I know with my day-to-dayexperience, if I was to put
myself into the future, it'd bedifficult, because you know I
balance between the reality ofwhat I'm feeling and
experiencing and you know what Isee is my future and
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experiencing, and you know whatI see is my future.
But living in a place thathasn't happened yet is really
difficult in the sense of youknow you're feeling one thing
and you're seeing another, and Ithink that there's definitely a
value in just living in the now.
I know, when I was locked upbecause I provided medicine for
sick people, I remember being ina horrible place where I just
(13:12):
was like, wow, I can't believeI'm here and I can't get out of
here.
I can't leave.
If I wanted to.
I can't eat what I want, Ican't do anything I want.
And then I thought to myselfyou know what, you're just in
this moment of time.
And then I thought to myselfyou know what you're just in
(13:55):
this moment of time, and at onepoint you'll be through it and
it won't be here anymore.
And that was the thing thathelped me to get through that.
And I just kept saying you know, just, this is a moment in time
.
Just keep walking, and beforeyou know it it'll be tomorrow,
and before you know it it'll betomorrow and before I know it
you'll be out of here.
Don't know where we're going,we don't have directions.
So setting goals and this has todo with health, you know, I
(14:15):
know when I started my healthjourney, I started, you know, by
losing weight and I had to lookto the future as my future.
If I didn't change, this wasgoing to be just like my dad's
and I was going to be probablydead before I was 70.
And you know, here I am 58.
And, aside from this cancer,I'm super healthy and I know
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when I get through this, I'mgoing to go back to a very
healthy life and it'll bebecause of looking to the future
at that time, and so, mostdefinitely, there's value to
that.
Your life satisfaction improves.
I think when you look to thefuture, you have something to
(15:00):
look forward to, you havesomething that gives you hope,
something that you hope for ispowerful.
I know, in my day-to-day livingright now, you know I've got a
tremendous amount of pain anddiscomfort all the time and I
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just look forward to that momentwhere that's gone and I can
feel it for moments, and evenjust getting a glimpse of a
retreat, which happens from timeto time, it's like aha, yeah,
it's.
It's an amazing experience toto just have a little bit of of
insight to what the future canbring.
(15:44):
Um, insight into long-termeffects of things.
That's another, anotherimportant element of the future.
So when you're looking to thefuture as to what you're doing,
um, you know your actions today.
You know planting trees, like onmy garden, the gardens of hope.
30 years ago I had the insightto just plant trees and at the
(16:09):
time you, I, you're never goingto see the the value of that,
but I knew if I just plantedthem in time, they would give me
what I needed.
And now we walk through thegarden and you know there's 30,
40 year old trees that would nothave been there had we not put
them in at that time And'rerealizing um, you know, we are
(16:32):
the future right now.
From from those experiences, Ithink really a big place where
the future can come into placeis by visualizing what you want
to see, so you can put in yourmind the thought and the vision
of what your future is going tobe.
(16:54):
And I think not think I knowthat if you can do that well
enough and then you're willingto take the actions that are
required, you can bring thosethings to life.
And you know these are proventechniques and all of that.
And I really think that,including strategic thinking,
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but to be able to take yourthought and your goal, your
wishes, and then turn it into avision that's happening, that's
operating in a future place butbringing it to the present,
that's some real powerfulactions that you can do if you
spend some time learning on itand then embracing change.
(17:39):
I think you know human beingsare programmed to avoid change
when we can, and yet change iswhere all positive growth comes
from.
If you stay the same, you knowyou're getting worse all the
time.
Generally, and in order to finda better place, you have to
change, but our nature is tostay doing the thing we did, get
(18:06):
in a rut and stay that way, andchange is uncomfortable for
most of us, and so by looking tothe future, we can embrace some
of these changes and get towhere we're at, and then maybe
finally, when you look to thefuture, you can really connect
yourself both to the past andthe present and you can learn on
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it.
So I know this is we kind ofskipped through this kind of
quickly and this is more of abullet point conversation, but I
really thought that steppingback sometimes is important and
looking at how we see things and, rather than being stuck in one
(18:49):
focused way or another, I thinkto realize the value of all of
these can really bring us moretruth and ultimately, we can
find a better health that way.
So I want to thank everybodywho supported the show and if
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(19:11):
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And that's happening, folks, sostay tuned.
(19:33):
I appreciate all the help.
This is Joe Grumbine with theHealthy Living Podcast.