August 28, 2024 • 23 mins
Join me for an inspiring conversation with Lilly Darling, CEO of Anchor Wave and a powerhouse in the digital marketing realm. Known for her visionary leadership and commitment to collaboration, Lilly embodies strength, determination, and a profound belief in the power of duality. In this episode, we delve into her journey, exploring the insights and wisdom she has to offer—both professionally and personally. Whether you're an aspiring leader or simply seeking motivation, Lilly's multifaceted approach will leave you inspired and ready to embrace your own path. Tune in and discover how positivity and collaboration can transform your life and career!
Website: https://anchorwave.com/
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Theresa Cesare (00:06):
Hey guys.
Welcome to Heart to Talk thepodcast.
I am the host and creatorTheresa Cesare My intention for
this podcast is to deliver toyou wisdom, inspiration, and
consciousness.
Through solo episodes andconversations amongst insightful
people.
It is my greatest honor to bringto you talks that come from the.
(00:32):
Welcome amazing listeners.
Today we have the honor ofspeaking with Lily Darling, the
CEO of AnchorWave, a renowneddigital marketing agency.
She is a powerhouse in the worldof digital marketing, a leader
with a vision and a trueadvocate for collaboration and
positivity.
Lily is a multifacetedindividual embodying strength,
(00:54):
determination, and a profoundbelief in the power of duality.
In this episode, we'll dive intoher story and discuss the wisdom
and insights she has to offer usboth personal and
professionally.
Get ready to be inspired andmotivated.
As we welcome the remarkableLily Darling to the show.
Wow.
If you could just get an introto every time you stepped in a
(01:15):
room.
I want to do an intro for younow I am just so excited to be
here and be able to just sharetime with you because I think we
could have a millionconversations and I'm excited to
have this one.
Behind that intro is a lot ofyears.
So yay for, for a lot of yearsand a lot of different
experiences.
I'm grateful for all that.
So I did grow up in Alaska andthen I came to Tucson.
(01:35):
So I like to say it was 180degree turn because truly that
Makes sense for our temperaturesand also just the extreme
contrast in life growing upthere, but coming to coming to
the U of a, was really the, thereason for that change I was.
Half an artist and half had thisbusiness mind.
Was very much interested in theart side and also in commerce.
(01:58):
so chose marketing and design asmy degree path, which led me to
a number of different agencypositions, mostly.
Back in that day, it was logos,business cards, print design,
but as time went on, theinternet was born, took over,
started to grow.
And that became one of thecentral places that people
really started to think aboutwhen, when they thought about
(02:20):
branding or marketing orbusiness or design.
And so 14 years ago, I began atanchor wave and started as a
project coordinator, which meansthat I would help clients from
the beginning to the launch oftheir websites.
and grew and grew and grew inthat role and in exposure to all
the different facets of, ofmarketing through different,
(02:42):
experiences, five differentpositions at the company
ultimately four years ago.
The owners decided to start anew business.
They still own the company, buthanded the baton of CEO to me.
That was also 2020.
And I don't know if you rememberwhat happened then, but there
was a lot of changes.
And so we actually, the fullteam went remote.
(03:04):
so I took on that role of beingCEO as well as leading the team
into this remote digitallyconnected, as we like to call
it, workspace.
So we've got a team of 20individuals, all different,
styles and all different typesof talents and skills.
Thank you for walking us throughthat.
And did you ever imagine at thebeginning of this journey that
you would become CEO?
(03:25):
I mean, cause how many peoplewant to flex that title?
Like CEO, I mean, that'sincredible.
Such an accomplishment.
Thank you.
You know, it's, it's funny whenit strikes you in different
times and places.
I will say as my kids havereflected it to me, Oh, CEO, it
sounds different.
Then, then in different times,whenever I'm introduced, cause
it feels so kind of organic.
(03:46):
Now there's a tiny part of methat I think it feels so much.
At home in my core that maybe Idid dream of it, but never said
that, or actually articulatedthe thought, at the forefront.
I had owned a branding firmbefore that.
And when you own a business,it's all on you to do all the
things, right?
So when I very first started atanchor wave, I thought this is
(04:09):
great.
I can go and do my nine to fiveand I don't even have to have an
email on my phone.
I go in, I do my thing and thenI'm done.
But it grew and grew.
And I think that's probably justan innate part of me.
I'm always thinking, innovating,creating, want to expand and
want to grow.
So it seems like a very naturalprogression to.
To be able to then touch allkinds of different areas of the
business and be able to workwith these amazing humans in a,
(04:31):
in a leading, in a coaching,capacity, as well as influence
the results for our clients.
Let's pivot for bothprofessional and personal.
You say that your current seasonhas given you the opportunity to
curate your life.
You say that your superpower inprogress is duality.
Tell us about this.
(04:52):
Well, this gosh, the dualitypiece has been a theme.
And this is where I kind ofharken back to both the extreme
change from Alaska to Arizona,right?
You've got these two differentsides.
And then I've got this.
Artistic side and business side.
And I'll tell you at the U of a,if you go from the Eller school
of business over to the designcollege, like it's night and
day, there's just two differentworlds.
So it's kind of felt like.
(05:14):
I was being forced to like,choose the one path.
Right.
And what is your final decision?
And it was always feeling likethey were in combat with one
another.
Choose one, choose the other,right?
If you choose option a, you'regoing to lose out on option B.
And so many times in life,you're not actually choosing one
(05:35):
or the other.
Actually, you have the choice tohave both of those happen at the
same time.
So whether it's a point ofchoice, Or whether that's just
the reality, there can be twothings that are true at the same
time.
So I, I have a couple examplesof, of that.
And it goes back to the intro ofthat question, which is this
recent season of life has had somuch change.
(05:57):
And, and I, I do use the termidentity a lot because I think
we're always developing that andour identity is always changing.
And I know the reason I love youcause you're, you talk about
how, what do you want toattract?
You know, what is your energy?
Bringing you to next.
Well, how do you want to changeand grow your identity?
What do you, what do you want tobe reflecting out to the world?
Um, and so thinking about thatfact that we've got a choice to
(06:18):
bring in curate, it's kind oflike this, the artistic side, if
I was to have my life viamuseum, what would I want on the
wall?
You know, what, what beautifulpiece do I want people to see
when they enter in, right?
What kind of experience would Iwant someone to have?
What kind of experience do Iwant to have in that back room
of my mind?
You know?
So thinking about like, wereally have choices in how we.
(06:39):
Put things into our lives.
And sometimes they take a lot ofwork to put them into our lives.
sometimes we have to extractthings out, you know, of our
lives that are not bringingpeace.
And so in my own personal life,there's been significant shifts,
some of which have been reallypositive and growth.
And some of which, changes inrelationship and intimate
relationships that you felt hadso much of your identity pinned
(07:00):
to it.
And then needing to reinvent ina way, who am I and what is my
identity?
So that.
Has given me the ability to kindof take back that power and say,
I'm making choices to curatewhat I have in my life.
And also sometimes you don'thave control over every single
thing and you need to find a wayto not, to not just resist.
So Two that are two that come tomind being strong and being
(07:24):
vulnerable.
I think sometimes when toughseasons happen in our lives, you
can make a choice to, be strongand power through and just get
what you get what you want.
That's one, that's one choiceand it can feel invigorating.
But you find that you kind oftighten up and even as I'm
saying this, I'm like, you know,shrinking my shoulders and
tightening my fist.
Cause like to be strong, youhave to, almost contract and
(07:44):
just muscle your way through.
But oftentimes the thing that'sgoing to help you grow and
expand is by having somevulnerability, opening up,
releasing, saying, this actuallyhurts.
I'm feeling a little bit rawright now, but that is being
strong.
So whenever I say it, I kind ofput both of my hands as I can.
Be strong, hold that in onehand.
(08:04):
I'm feeling strong.
I'm going to hold strong to myboundaries, or I'm going to make
a strong decision.
And in the other hand, here, Ihave this vulnerability of, I'm
still going to feel thefeelings.
I'm still gonna maybe even,allow someone to see me being
weak or not, fully like excitedin that moment.
I'm feeling just morevulnerable.
So both of those things, Areactually happening concurrently,
(08:25):
but allowing both of thosethings to happen at the same
time is the thing that, youknow, brings about the next
stage of, of life brings aboutthat greater amount of peace and
it's the kind of life that Iwant to live.
So it is curating thatexperience.
I find it everywhere.
And whether you think of it ornot, you're trying to always do
this balancing, kind of act.
But sometimes it's, decidingthat there's only one thing that
(08:48):
can be present.
Two things that are oftentimesvery different can be very true
at the same time.
You can't actually be, happy andsad simultaneously.
And so, not feeling like youare, like it's too much of a
contrast or that you're likethat.
You're being inauthentic, orlying to yourself.
Like those things are just bigand you can hold them in and
(09:08):
have that space, for both ofthose at the same time.
I love that.
I could personally relate whereI've been embracing duality as
well as a power because I tendto, and many people, right?
Like I've got to push through.
I cannot show that I'm upset,but it's, been such a game
changer in my personal journeyto honor my real feelings
because if you don't, it'll comeup somewhere.
(09:28):
So tell us about how you educateand coach others.
Yeah, absolutely.
Well, it's one of my favoritethings.
And I think not only justmyself, but I think it was
handed down anchor wave is avery educational based company.
And in fact, the company thatwas started four years by the
owners as an addition to that isa coaching company.
So we coach agencies across theworld to do what anchor wave
(09:50):
does.
So, not only that.
But I think one of the leadingthings that we do with our
clients is to reduce the jargon.
Marketing is a very jargonheavy.
Tech is very jargon heavy.
People can use that to theiradvantage to sound smart or to
make someone else feel dumb,which is worse in my opinion.
And so we really took the stanceof, we want to reduce the amount
(10:11):
of jargon, bring things down totheir base elements and be able
to explain them.
Because I truly believe whenbusiness leaders are empowered
to, understand what theiroptions are, they make better
decisions for themselves.
And then ultimately they growand they're more successful.
Right.
And that's the same thing with,with leading a team is that if I
(10:32):
want to grow into my next levelof influence and next
professional, career or newexpansive things that I'm doing,
there's going to be some thingsthat I'm doing right now that I
need to let go of.
Right.
So I'm always like looking atwhat do I need to hand off?
What do I need to say no to, orwhat do I need to Teach someone
else to do that.
I've already mastered, butthey're stepping into right.
(10:53):
So education as a way ofconstantly growing myself, to
reach for the next level.
But also saying, what are thethings that someone else could
step into?
and there's a balance of.
Really being aware of wherepeople are raising their hands.
We just going to use that phrasea lot.
Where am I seeing that thisperson is raising their hand to
do something or where do theylight up?
(11:13):
You know, what do they reallythrive in doing?
And, and values are a part ofthat.
Their own personal work styleare a part of that, but you can
start to pick up where are theyraising their hand, where are
they lighting up?
And how can I give them thateducational opportunity to learn
the skill that's around that?
and more and more lately, Ithink people will show you when
they're really in the zone.
You can just kind of tell.
(11:35):
And I think if you're braveenough to say, maybe I don't
have a role for that right now,but we can start to give
experience and exposure to thattype of work.
And then all of thatcollectively can create a role
or create the next level intheir career opportunity too.
So.
Love it so much.
All right.
So I learned that you spent sometime.
(11:58):
It's in Goshen, Uganda.
What an adventure.
Tell us about it and theinspiration behind it.
Yes, so I like to say I've gotmy daughter who's twenty and my
son who is seventeen and then Ihave sixty five other kids.
Oh wow, that's great.
And they, they, you know.
They've grown in number.
Originally about 14, 15 yearsago, I, came in contact with
(12:20):
this organization and at thattime there were a handful of
kids, in Burundi.
So Burundi is actually a verysmall country near Congo.
And these kids, did not.
Have the fortunate lifecircumstance of having
caretakers, having parents.
There was a lot of strife in thearea at that time, an attack on
a UN camp that had happened.
(12:41):
And that area of the world, hasa number of challenges.
We'll just call it that.
Actually, the funny thing aboutthe story is that prior to being
exposed to that group and thatorganization, I had created a
fundraiser, to raise money usingart again, bumper stickers to
kind of sell these differentbumper stickers, to kind of
(13:01):
increase your impact and be ableto communicate a message.
So I had created the fundraiserfirst, and then met them.
The group.
And so when we met, it was like,Oh my gosh, this is just like
such a match and so made myfirst trip to Africa at that
point in time, just to kind ofdo more of like a, a scouting.
Uh, I also was really intophotography at the time as well.
So kind of do a scout, make sureit was legit.
(13:23):
Take photos and just a thousandpercent fell in love.
And it was, I don't know, one ofthe experiences in my life where
you just know, beyond knowing,beyond knowing, beyond knowing
that that was meant to be, thatthat was, a purpose of, of
almost my life, to have, to havemet these kids.
So fast forward, my gosh,there's probably like.
12 documentaries and a lot ofepisodes of things that have
(13:46):
happened in that timeline.
But, those kids that originallymet are now, nearly 20 years
old.
I've been able to travel with mydaughter twice.
She's the real photographer now.
So she, facilitates a lot ofthat work in videography and,
just grow with these kids andsee their lives change and see
the educational opportunitiesexpand.
And now kind of Being at thisyoung adult phase, which is a
(14:08):
beautiful time and confusingtime, but like, what are you
going to do with the rest ofyour life?
And you have your, your wholelife ahead of you.
Not without a lot of duality, Iwill say a lot of heartbreak and
a lot of beauty coming out ofthat, a lot of resilience,
despite some like impossibledaunting situations.
But I will say, navigating thatand going along with the changes
(14:28):
and, being there, to just.
Provide a light show them thatsomebody sees them, has been the
biggest gift in my life.
And I will say, I have receiveda thousand times more than I
have ever really been able tocontribute.
So I just go and, bring bubblesand play soccer.
And, that is that in and ofitself, it feels like a simple
(14:48):
contribution, but I think, whatthey've been able to give.
Back to us and demonstrate interms of real perseverance and,
and love.
Is yeah, I could talk about thatforever.
It sounds so inspiring and braveit's pretty courageous.
It initially, I will tell you,gosh, I still remember being in
(15:09):
the Uber on the way to theairport the very first time
because I had up in a veryconservative Baptist church, and
I remember them talking aboutmissionaries going to Africa who
would send their, this, thissounds crazy now.
I mean, I don't know.
Say it out loud.
send their coffin with them ontrips because, not because of
fear of, of people necessarily,but.
Of just life there andmosquitoes or, or anything else
(15:34):
that could come against you.
So I did have that kind of inthe very historical, you know,
corners of my mind.
and so it felt, It felt brave atthat point, but there's chaos
everywhere, and if you're goingto live your life that way,
thinking about that, there couldbe, detriment, you're going to
shrink your possibilities, andthere's stuff that happens on
(15:55):
our street corners here.
So for me, I wasn't looking atit as, as a dangerous thing any
more than, than driving on thefreeway.
You know, I, I just kind of hadthat mindset of like, there can
be things that are, that arescary anywhere you go.
And, the good outweighs the badand, I'm going to choose to look
at the, at the good and not letthe, let the fear kind of,
(16:15):
overwhelm the opportunity.
It's still there.
You know, that's another thingthat you got to hold the duality
is sometimes you're scared andyou do it anyway.
So it was this, the scary was,you know, has been there in
times.
But the light just absolutelyoverwhelms the dark.
I love that you mention thatbecause talk about duality for
me, that's been the theme.
I feel like I'm in the chapterof I'm scared and I'm doing it
(16:36):
anyway.
And I think that's the truthbehind anything amazing It's
when you're willing to just beone of the brave ones.
And I think a lot of people, youknow, glorify, glamorize the
other side of anything you wantto create, do, or be, but
underneath it, truth be told,make impact on yourself and
others.
(16:56):
It breaks down into just likeeven your own physical response,
like, just like getting up onstage or doing a podcast, I'm
sure for the first couple oftimes, your, your stomach is
tight or you feel like you mightthrow up or your hands are
sweating and like, just to gothrough that physical part, not
only the mental part of like,what if I fail and what if I
suck, there's all that you haveto have a toughness to get
(17:18):
through those.
does get easier, but you have tobe willing to suck at first, you
have to be willing to like getbad feedback at first, or
whatever it feels like you'renot going to ever do anything
new and feel like you're anexpert at, at the beginning.
So you have to have thattoughness of, I'm going to get
through being uncomfortable.
And then, hopefully it gets alittle easier and a little
easier and your, your tummy isnot quite so tight at knots, you
know?
But having it there and justrealizing that's not a sign to
(17:40):
stop, it's just a, I'm going to,I'm going to buckle down.
I'm going to, get through thisand then I'll get to that next
level.
Absolutely love that.
you Are known for yourcommitment to collaboration and
authentic.
I love the word authenticpositivity.
And I like your phrase, if youwant to go fast, Go alone.
If you want to go far, gotogether.
(18:01):
Tell us about the impact onourselves and the world.
When we move in that mindset,you know, the willingness to see
another person, as A uniqueindividual who's had their own
collection of experiences who'smade them what they are, or
their choices, ultimately likebring them to, to where they
are.
(18:22):
And there are so many goodthings about that, that I guess
I've just had the experience ofknowing that they hold.
A piece of the answer.
I can't possibly have the entireanswer.
And if I think I let my ego saythat I've got everything, I'm
going to miss out, because Iknow that the people around me
have a part of the answer, havea piece of the puzzle.
And so that gives me theinterest to allow space for that
(18:45):
piece of the puzzle.
So come forward and I've had theexperience of over and over
seeing that when you hear all ofthose different pieces and then
you land on an answer or thenyou land on a strategy or then
you land on a product orwhatever it is that you're, that
you're building, you are goingto create something that's more
stable.
that is more robust.
It's been thought about in anumber of different ways rather
(19:05):
than if I just started the, thesolution myself and thought, Oh,
I could see it.
I know exactly what we're gonnado here.
I'm just gonna go.
It might actually be faster.
Like, I might be able to, like,write it out or put it out to
the market quickly.
But then I'm gonna.
Learn those lessons later ondown the track, and it's going
to take me more time to recover.
So getting that collectiveinput, allowing people to be who
(19:27):
they are authentically, andholding space to hear that and
then and then taking a littlebit more time up front.
There's some time investment insitting down and having a
meeting and brainstorming andallowing that space for that
authentic information, thosepieces of the puzzle to come
forward.
A lot of business owners arefast.
They talk fast.
I tend to talk a little bit.
They want to go fast.
(19:48):
You know, they want the solutionnow, you know, the, the clock is
running and I get that.
And so it's hard for us to slowdown a little bit and say, we
need this space at thebeginning.
We need to allow these differentpieces to come forward.
We need to allow the time tounderstand, you know, the value
of this person's authenticperspective that they're going
to bring to the table.
And I'm willing.
(20:08):
Okay.
Even though it's very differentto listen to it, you know, and a
lot of space for that.
And then I think, Once you havea few of those experiences, you
recognize that was worth it.
It was worth it to slow down thebeginning to go farther and more
stable and without as much pain,you know, once things actually
do get moving.
so that's why I love that quote.
When we were in the office, we,we.
(20:29):
Plastered all of ourinspirational quotes on the
bathroom wall.
So the bathroom became thislittle oasis refuge, but that
one was front and center and hasalways been my favorite and has
proven itself time and timeagain, you know, in teams and in
the company and even infriendships, you know, in, in,
in relationships with otherpeople.
If you only rely on yourself,sure, you'll, you might be able
(20:51):
to make a quick decision, butit's not gonna.
Yeah.
Have the cool, you know, inputand context of, of doing that
relationship together.
And then, and then going to thenext action or stuff together.
I love that.
I'm going to now dive into theclosing traditional questions.
So the first one, what is yourfavorite book?
(21:12):
So my favorite book and thentalked about all the Brene
Brown, uh, inputs.
And I listened to podcasts and,dare to lead, I think, has been
the most transformational forme, personally, and then also in
the company, from first readingit and then recommending it to
our directors and leadership.
And now it's on our kind ofrequired leading reading list,
(21:34):
because it really does bringtogether so much of that
research.
We've had people, like Imentioned, we've got, you know,
engineering minded people andprogramming minded.
What I love about Brene and thatbook in particular, you have the
research and, and the qualityand the quantitative data, but
then you bring in thisqualitative component of it that
feels very human too.
(21:55):
So the merge of like both sidesof your brain again, duality of
like your left and your rightcoming together and being like,
this is a great way to embraceboth of those.
So dare to lead is the.
Is the short answer.
And it's been verytransformational.
I love it.
I'm adding it to my list I'mexcited to read that.
All right.
And the final question, do youhave a favorite affirmation or
(22:16):
mantra you use to stayempowered?
I am capable.
And so I think it speaks tolike, no matter what happens,
I've got the resources and whatI need to be response able, like
able to respond, to whateverkind of comes my way.
There is work in, in terms ofbeing able to feel that that's
true in terms of I'm capable,you know, whatever comes my way,
(22:38):
I've got the resources and whatI need, or I can ask for them,
to be able to respond.
and I believe, you know, feels alittle bit more of like the
energetic, kind of component.
I truly, I do believe in mybones, the best will come out of
this.
And if it's tough, there's goingto be a lesson.
And if there's good, then I cansoak in that and enjoy it.
So those, are my go to, I amcapable.
And I believe you on a dailybasis,
(23:07):
thank you so much for tuning into this
episode.
Please download, rate,subscribe, and share this
podcast.
Also, be sure to visit mytheresacesare.com to check out
my inspirational merch, connectto my social accounts, and much
more may you continue to befilled with wisdom, inspiration,
and consciousness.
(23:27):
Otherwise, friends, I will beback in two weeks for another
episode of Heart to.
Hey guys.
Welcome to Heart to Talk thepodcast.
I am the host and creatorTheresa Cesare My intention for
this podcast is to deliver toyou wisdom, inspiration, and
consciousness.
Through solo episodes andconversations amongst insightful
people.
It is my greatest honor to bringto you talks that come from the.
(00:32):
Welcome amazing listeners.
Today we have the honor ofspeaking with Lily Darling, the
CEO of AnchorWave, a renowneddigital marketing agency.
She is a powerhouse in the worldof digital marketing, a leader
with a vision and a trueadvocate for collaboration and
positivity.
Lily is a multifacetedindividual embodying strength,
(00:54):
determination, and a profoundbelief in the power of duality.
In this episode, we'll dive intoher story and discuss the wisdom
and insights she has to offer usboth personal and
professionally.
Get ready to be inspired andmotivated.
As we welcome the remarkableLily Darling to the show.
Wow.
If you could just get an introto every time you stepped in a
(01:15):
room.
I want to do an intro for younow I am just so excited to be
here and be able to just sharetime with you because I think we
could have a millionconversations and I'm excited to
have this one.
Behind that intro is a lot ofyears.
So yay for, for a lot of yearsand a lot of different
experiences.
I'm grateful for all that.
So I did grow up in Alaska andthen I came to Tucson.
(01:35):
So I like to say it was 180degree turn because truly that
Makes sense for our temperaturesand also just the extreme
contrast in life growing upthere, but coming to coming to
the U of a, was really the, thereason for that change I was.
Half an artist and half had thisbusiness mind.
Was very much interested in theart side and also in commerce.
(01:58):
so chose marketing and design asmy degree path, which led me to
a number of different agencypositions, mostly.
Back in that day, it was logos,business cards, print design,
but as time went on, theinternet was born, took over,
started to grow.
And that became one of thecentral places that people
really started to think aboutwhen, when they thought about
(02:20):
branding or marketing orbusiness or design.
And so 14 years ago, I began atanchor wave and started as a
project coordinator, which meansthat I would help clients from
the beginning to the launch oftheir websites.
and grew and grew and grew inthat role and in exposure to all
the different facets of, ofmarketing through different,
(02:42):
experiences, five differentpositions at the company
ultimately four years ago.
The owners decided to start anew business.
They still own the company, buthanded the baton of CEO to me.
That was also 2020.
And I don't know if you rememberwhat happened then, but there
was a lot of changes.
And so we actually, the fullteam went remote.
(03:04):
so I took on that role of beingCEO as well as leading the team
into this remote digitallyconnected, as we like to call
it, workspace.
So we've got a team of 20individuals, all different,
styles and all different typesof talents and skills.
Thank you for walking us throughthat.
And did you ever imagine at thebeginning of this journey that
you would become CEO?
(03:25):
I mean, cause how many peoplewant to flex that title?
Like CEO, I mean, that'sincredible.
Such an accomplishment.
Thank you.
You know, it's, it's funny whenit strikes you in different
times and places.
I will say as my kids havereflected it to me, Oh, CEO, it
sounds different.
Then, then in different times,whenever I'm introduced, cause
it feels so kind of organic.
(03:46):
Now there's a tiny part of methat I think it feels so much.
At home in my core that maybe Idid dream of it, but never said
that, or actually articulatedthe thought, at the forefront.
I had owned a branding firmbefore that.
And when you own a business,it's all on you to do all the
things, right?
So when I very first started atanchor wave, I thought this is
(04:09):
great.
I can go and do my nine to fiveand I don't even have to have an
email on my phone.
I go in, I do my thing and thenI'm done.
But it grew and grew.
And I think that's probably justan innate part of me.
I'm always thinking, innovating,creating, want to expand and
want to grow.
So it seems like a very naturalprogression to.
To be able to then touch allkinds of different areas of the
business and be able to workwith these amazing humans in a,
(04:31):
in a leading, in a coaching,capacity, as well as influence
the results for our clients.
Let's pivot for bothprofessional and personal.
You say that your current seasonhas given you the opportunity to
curate your life.
You say that your superpower inprogress is duality.
Tell us about this.
(04:52):
Well, this gosh, the dualitypiece has been a theme.
And this is where I kind ofharken back to both the extreme
change from Alaska to Arizona,right?
You've got these two differentsides.
And then I've got this.
Artistic side and business side.
And I'll tell you at the U of a,if you go from the Eller school
of business over to the designcollege, like it's night and
day, there's just two differentworlds.
So it's kind of felt like.
(05:14):
I was being forced to like,choose the one path.
Right.
And what is your final decision?
And it was always feeling likethey were in combat with one
another.
Choose one, choose the other,right?
If you choose option a, you'regoing to lose out on option B.
And so many times in life,you're not actually choosing one
(05:35):
or the other.
Actually, you have the choice tohave both of those happen at the
same time.
So whether it's a point ofchoice, Or whether that's just
the reality, there can be twothings that are true at the same
time.
So I, I have a couple examplesof, of that.
And it goes back to the intro ofthat question, which is this
recent season of life has had somuch change.
(05:57):
And, and I, I do use the termidentity a lot because I think
we're always developing that andour identity is always changing.
And I know the reason I love youcause you're, you talk about
how, what do you want toattract?
You know, what is your energy?
Bringing you to next.
Well, how do you want to changeand grow your identity?
What do you, what do you want tobe reflecting out to the world?
Um, and so thinking about thatfact that we've got a choice to
(06:18):
bring in curate, it's kind oflike this, the artistic side, if
I was to have my life viamuseum, what would I want on the
wall?
You know, what, what beautifulpiece do I want people to see
when they enter in, right?
What kind of experience would Iwant someone to have?
What kind of experience do Iwant to have in that back room
of my mind?
You know?
So thinking about like, wereally have choices in how we.
(06:39):
Put things into our lives.
And sometimes they take a lot ofwork to put them into our lives.
sometimes we have to extractthings out, you know, of our
lives that are not bringingpeace.
And so in my own personal life,there's been significant shifts,
some of which have been reallypositive and growth.
And some of which, changes inrelationship and intimate
relationships that you felt hadso much of your identity pinned
(07:00):
to it.
And then needing to reinvent ina way, who am I and what is my
identity?
So that.
Has given me the ability to kindof take back that power and say,
I'm making choices to curatewhat I have in my life.
And also sometimes you don'thave control over every single
thing and you need to find a wayto not, to not just resist.
So Two that are two that come tomind being strong and being
(07:24):
vulnerable.
I think sometimes when toughseasons happen in our lives, you
can make a choice to, be strongand power through and just get
what you get what you want.
That's one, that's one choiceand it can feel invigorating.
But you find that you kind oftighten up and even as I'm
saying this, I'm like, you know,shrinking my shoulders and
tightening my fist.
Cause like to be strong, youhave to, almost contract and
(07:44):
just muscle your way through.
But oftentimes the thing that'sgoing to help you grow and
expand is by having somevulnerability, opening up,
releasing, saying, this actuallyhurts.
I'm feeling a little bit rawright now, but that is being
strong.
So whenever I say it, I kind ofput both of my hands as I can.
Be strong, hold that in onehand.
(08:04):
I'm feeling strong.
I'm going to hold strong to myboundaries, or I'm going to make
a strong decision.
And in the other hand, here, Ihave this vulnerability of, I'm
still going to feel thefeelings.
I'm still gonna maybe even,allow someone to see me being
weak or not, fully like excitedin that moment.
I'm feeling just morevulnerable.
So both of those things, Areactually happening concurrently,
(08:25):
but allowing both of thosethings to happen at the same
time is the thing that, youknow, brings about the next
stage of, of life brings aboutthat greater amount of peace and
it's the kind of life that Iwant to live.
So it is curating thatexperience.
I find it everywhere.
And whether you think of it ornot, you're trying to always do
this balancing, kind of act.
But sometimes it's, decidingthat there's only one thing that
(08:48):
can be present.
Two things that are oftentimesvery different can be very true
at the same time.
You can't actually be, happy andsad simultaneously.
And so, not feeling like youare, like it's too much of a
contrast or that you're likethat.
You're being inauthentic, orlying to yourself.
Like those things are just bigand you can hold them in and
(09:08):
have that space, for both ofthose at the same time.
I love that.
I could personally relate whereI've been embracing duality as
well as a power because I tendto, and many people, right?
Like I've got to push through.
I cannot show that I'm upset,but it's, been such a game
changer in my personal journeyto honor my real feelings
because if you don't, it'll comeup somewhere.
(09:28):
So tell us about how you educateand coach others.
Yeah, absolutely.
Well, it's one of my favoritethings.
And I think not only justmyself, but I think it was
handed down anchor wave is avery educational based company.
And in fact, the company thatwas started four years by the
owners as an addition to that isa coaching company.
So we coach agencies across theworld to do what anchor wave
(09:50):
does.
So, not only that.
But I think one of the leadingthings that we do with our
clients is to reduce the jargon.
Marketing is a very jargonheavy.
Tech is very jargon heavy.
People can use that to theiradvantage to sound smart or to
make someone else feel dumb,which is worse in my opinion.
And so we really took the stanceof, we want to reduce the amount
(10:11):
of jargon, bring things down totheir base elements and be able
to explain them.
Because I truly believe whenbusiness leaders are empowered
to, understand what theiroptions are, they make better
decisions for themselves.
And then ultimately they growand they're more successful.
Right.
And that's the same thing with,with leading a team is that if I
(10:32):
want to grow into my next levelof influence and next
professional, career or newexpansive things that I'm doing,
there's going to be some thingsthat I'm doing right now that I
need to let go of.
Right.
So I'm always like looking atwhat do I need to hand off?
What do I need to say no to, orwhat do I need to Teach someone
else to do that.
I've already mastered, butthey're stepping into right.
(10:53):
So education as a way ofconstantly growing myself, to
reach for the next level.
But also saying, what are thethings that someone else could
step into?
and there's a balance of.
Really being aware of wherepeople are raising their hands.
We just going to use that phrasea lot.
Where am I seeing that thisperson is raising their hand to
do something or where do theylight up?
(11:13):
You know, what do they reallythrive in doing?
And, and values are a part ofthat.
Their own personal work styleare a part of that, but you can
start to pick up where are theyraising their hand, where are
they lighting up?
And how can I give them thateducational opportunity to learn
the skill that's around that?
and more and more lately, Ithink people will show you when
they're really in the zone.
You can just kind of tell.
(11:35):
And I think if you're braveenough to say, maybe I don't
have a role for that right now,but we can start to give
experience and exposure to thattype of work.
And then all of thatcollectively can create a role
or create the next level intheir career opportunity too.
So.
Love it so much.
All right.
So I learned that you spent sometime.
(11:58):
It's in Goshen, Uganda.
What an adventure.
Tell us about it and theinspiration behind it.
Yes, so I like to say I've gotmy daughter who's twenty and my
son who is seventeen and then Ihave sixty five other kids.
Oh wow, that's great.
And they, they, you know.
They've grown in number.
Originally about 14, 15 yearsago, I, came in contact with
(12:20):
this organization and at thattime there were a handful of
kids, in Burundi.
So Burundi is actually a verysmall country near Congo.
And these kids, did not.
Have the fortunate lifecircumstance of having
caretakers, having parents.
There was a lot of strife in thearea at that time, an attack on
a UN camp that had happened.
(12:41):
And that area of the world, hasa number of challenges.
We'll just call it that.
Actually, the funny thing aboutthe story is that prior to being
exposed to that group and thatorganization, I had created a
fundraiser, to raise money usingart again, bumper stickers to
kind of sell these differentbumper stickers, to kind of
(13:01):
increase your impact and be ableto communicate a message.
So I had created the fundraiserfirst, and then met them.
The group.
And so when we met, it was like,Oh my gosh, this is just like
such a match and so made myfirst trip to Africa at that
point in time, just to kind ofdo more of like a, a scouting.
Uh, I also was really intophotography at the time as well.
So kind of do a scout, make sureit was legit.
(13:23):
Take photos and just a thousandpercent fell in love.
And it was, I don't know, one ofthe experiences in my life where
you just know, beyond knowing,beyond knowing, beyond knowing
that that was meant to be, thatthat was, a purpose of, of
almost my life, to have, to havemet these kids.
So fast forward, my gosh,there's probably like.
12 documentaries and a lot ofepisodes of things that have
(13:46):
happened in that timeline.
But, those kids that originallymet are now, nearly 20 years
old.
I've been able to travel with mydaughter twice.
She's the real photographer now.
So she, facilitates a lot ofthat work in videography and,
just grow with these kids andsee their lives change and see
the educational opportunitiesexpand.
And now kind of Being at thisyoung adult phase, which is a
(14:08):
beautiful time and confusingtime, but like, what are you
going to do with the rest ofyour life?
And you have your, your wholelife ahead of you.
Not without a lot of duality, Iwill say a lot of heartbreak and
a lot of beauty coming out ofthat, a lot of resilience,
despite some like impossibledaunting situations.
But I will say, navigating thatand going along with the changes
(14:28):
and, being there, to just.
Provide a light show them thatsomebody sees them, has been the
biggest gift in my life.
And I will say, I have receiveda thousand times more than I
have ever really been able tocontribute.
So I just go and, bring bubblesand play soccer.
And, that is that in and ofitself, it feels like a simple
(14:48):
contribution, but I think, whatthey've been able to give.
Back to us and demonstrate interms of real perseverance and,
and love.
Is yeah, I could talk about thatforever.
It sounds so inspiring and braveit's pretty courageous.
It initially, I will tell you,gosh, I still remember being in
(15:09):
the Uber on the way to theairport the very first time
because I had up in a veryconservative Baptist church, and
I remember them talking aboutmissionaries going to Africa who
would send their, this, thissounds crazy now.
I mean, I don't know.
Say it out loud.
send their coffin with them ontrips because, not because of
fear of, of people necessarily,but.
Of just life there andmosquitoes or, or anything else
(15:34):
that could come against you.
So I did have that kind of inthe very historical, you know,
corners of my mind.
and so it felt, It felt brave atthat point, but there's chaos
everywhere, and if you're goingto live your life that way,
thinking about that, there couldbe, detriment, you're going to
shrink your possibilities, andthere's stuff that happens on
(15:55):
our street corners here.
So for me, I wasn't looking atit as, as a dangerous thing any
more than, than driving on thefreeway.
You know, I, I just kind of hadthat mindset of like, there can
be things that are, that arescary anywhere you go.
And, the good outweighs the badand, I'm going to choose to look
at the, at the good and not letthe, let the fear kind of,
(16:15):
overwhelm the opportunity.
It's still there.
You know, that's another thingthat you got to hold the duality
is sometimes you're scared andyou do it anyway.
So it was this, the scary was,you know, has been there in
times.
But the light just absolutelyoverwhelms the dark.
I love that you mention thatbecause talk about duality for
me, that's been the theme.
I feel like I'm in the chapterof I'm scared and I'm doing it
(16:36):
anyway.
And I think that's the truthbehind anything amazing It's
when you're willing to just beone of the brave ones.
And I think a lot of people, youknow, glorify, glamorize the
other side of anything you wantto create, do, or be, but
underneath it, truth be told,make impact on yourself and
others.
(16:56):
It breaks down into just likeeven your own physical response,
like, just like getting up onstage or doing a podcast, I'm
sure for the first couple oftimes, your, your stomach is
tight or you feel like you mightthrow up or your hands are
sweating and like, just to gothrough that physical part, not
only the mental part of like,what if I fail and what if I
suck, there's all that you haveto have a toughness to get
(17:18):
through those.
does get easier, but you have tobe willing to suck at first, you
have to be willing to like getbad feedback at first, or
whatever it feels like you'renot going to ever do anything
new and feel like you're anexpert at, at the beginning.
So you have to have thattoughness of, I'm going to get
through being uncomfortable.
And then, hopefully it gets alittle easier and a little
easier and your, your tummy isnot quite so tight at knots, you
know?
But having it there and justrealizing that's not a sign to
(17:40):
stop, it's just a, I'm going to,I'm going to buckle down.
I'm going to, get through thisand then I'll get to that next
level.
Absolutely love that.
you Are known for yourcommitment to collaboration and
authentic.
I love the word authenticpositivity.
And I like your phrase, if youwant to go fast, Go alone.
If you want to go far, gotogether.
(18:01):
Tell us about the impact onourselves and the world.
When we move in that mindset,you know, the willingness to see
another person, as A uniqueindividual who's had their own
collection of experiences who'smade them what they are, or
their choices, ultimately likebring them to, to where they
are.
(18:22):
And there are so many goodthings about that, that I guess
I've just had the experience ofknowing that they hold.
A piece of the answer.
I can't possibly have the entireanswer.
And if I think I let my ego saythat I've got everything, I'm
going to miss out, because Iknow that the people around me
have a part of the answer, havea piece of the puzzle.
And so that gives me theinterest to allow space for that
(18:45):
piece of the puzzle.
So come forward and I've had theexperience of over and over
seeing that when you hear all ofthose different pieces and then
you land on an answer or thenyou land on a strategy or then
you land on a product orwhatever it is that you're, that
you're building, you are goingto create something that's more
stable.
that is more robust.
It's been thought about in anumber of different ways rather
(19:05):
than if I just started the, thesolution myself and thought, Oh,
I could see it.
I know exactly what we're gonnado here.
I'm just gonna go.
It might actually be faster.
Like, I might be able to, like,write it out or put it out to
the market quickly.
But then I'm gonna.
Learn those lessons later ondown the track, and it's going
to take me more time to recover.
So getting that collectiveinput, allowing people to be who
(19:27):
they are authentically, andholding space to hear that and
then and then taking a littlebit more time up front.
There's some time investment insitting down and having a
meeting and brainstorming andallowing that space for that
authentic information, thosepieces of the puzzle to come
forward.
A lot of business owners arefast.
They talk fast.
I tend to talk a little bit.
They want to go fast.
(19:48):
You know, they want the solutionnow, you know, the, the clock is
running and I get that.
And so it's hard for us to slowdown a little bit and say, we
need this space at thebeginning.
We need to allow these differentpieces to come forward.
We need to allow the time tounderstand, you know, the value
of this person's authenticperspective that they're going
to bring to the table.
And I'm willing.
(20:08):
Okay.
Even though it's very differentto listen to it, you know, and a
lot of space for that.
And then I think, Once you havea few of those experiences, you
recognize that was worth it.
It was worth it to slow down thebeginning to go farther and more
stable and without as much pain,you know, once things actually
do get moving.
so that's why I love that quote.
When we were in the office, we,we.
(20:29):
Plastered all of ourinspirational quotes on the
bathroom wall.
So the bathroom became thislittle oasis refuge, but that
one was front and center and hasalways been my favorite and has
proven itself time and timeagain, you know, in teams and in
the company and even infriendships, you know, in, in,
in relationships with otherpeople.
If you only rely on yourself,sure, you'll, you might be able
(20:51):
to make a quick decision, butit's not gonna.
Yeah.
Have the cool, you know, inputand context of, of doing that
relationship together.
And then, and then going to thenext action or stuff together.
I love that.
I'm going to now dive into theclosing traditional questions.
So the first one, what is yourfavorite book?
(21:12):
So my favorite book and thentalked about all the Brene
Brown, uh, inputs.
And I listened to podcasts and,dare to lead, I think, has been
the most transformational forme, personally, and then also in
the company, from first readingit and then recommending it to
our directors and leadership.
And now it's on our kind ofrequired leading reading list,
(21:34):
because it really does bringtogether so much of that
research.
We've had people, like Imentioned, we've got, you know,
engineering minded people andprogramming minded.
What I love about Brene and thatbook in particular, you have the
research and, and the qualityand the quantitative data, but
then you bring in thisqualitative component of it that
feels very human too.
(21:55):
So the merge of like both sidesof your brain again, duality of
like your left and your rightcoming together and being like,
this is a great way to embraceboth of those.
So dare to lead is the.
Is the short answer.
And it's been verytransformational.
I love it.
I'm adding it to my list I'mexcited to read that.
All right.
And the final question, do youhave a favorite affirmation or
(22:16):
mantra you use to stayempowered?
I am capable.
And so I think it speaks tolike, no matter what happens,
I've got the resources and whatI need to be response able, like
able to respond, to whateverkind of comes my way.
There is work in, in terms ofbeing able to feel that that's
true in terms of I'm capable,you know, whatever comes my way,
(22:38):
I've got the resources and whatI need, or I can ask for them,
to be able to respond.
and I believe, you know, feels alittle bit more of like the
energetic, kind of component.
I truly, I do believe in mybones, the best will come out of
this.
And if it's tough, there's goingto be a lesson.
And if there's good, then I cansoak in that and enjoy it.
So those, are my go to, I amcapable.
And I believe you on a dailybasis,
(23:07):
thank you so much for tuning into this
episode.
Please download, rate,subscribe, and share this
podcast.
Also, be sure to visit mytheresacesare.com to check out
my inspirational merch, connectto my social accounts, and much
more may you continue to befilled with wisdom, inspiration,
and consciousness.
(23:27):
Otherwise, friends, I will beback in two weeks for another
episode of Heart to.
Popular Podcasts
Bookmarked by Reese's Book Club
Welcome to Bookmarked by Reese’s Book Club — the podcast where great stories, bold women, and irresistible conversations collide! Hosted by award-winning journalist Danielle Robay, each week new episodes balance thoughtful literary insight with the fervor of buzzy book trends, pop culture and more. Bookmarked brings together celebrities, tastemakers, influencers and authors from Reese's Book Club and beyond to share stories that transcend the page. Pull up a chair. You’re not just listening — you’re part of the conversation.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!