February 3, 2021 • 21 mins
1. What is the process women need to implement to improve their mental well being?
2. What are the 3 steps women need to take to enhance their mental well being?
Did you know that the two most common mental health conditions for women are depression and anxiety? This comes as no surprise to us because women have so much on their plate! At any given time, we're juggling multiple roles that leave us no time to take care of our mental health. So how do we help women reduce these mental health challenges?
In this episode, I sat down with Ellie Bozmarova, a meditation teacher and mindset coach, to discuss the simple 3-step process that women can implement in their daily lives to improve their mental well-being in the new year and beyond.
Though there is no magical cure, our wish is for you to come away with actionable tips and tools that can help you lower your blood pressure and stress level and put you on a much-deserved path to mental wellness.
Subscribe to HerCanvas today to get your answers to the questions that matter most to you, and ultimately, find the inspiration to live your best life.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
The two most common mental health conditions for
women, uh, depression andanxiety.
This comes as no surprise to usbecause let's face it.
Women have a lot on their plate.
We're often juggling multipleroles, such as caregivers,
mothers, and partners, whileworking in running our
households top that with theknowledge that we're more likely
to live in poverty than men toexperience physical and sexual
(00:24):
abuse and to deal with theimpact of hormonal changes both
emotionally and physically.
It's no wonder our mentalwellbeing is compromised,
though.
There's no magical cure.
We can find ways to mitigatethese mental health challenges
by addressing two key questions.
What is a process women need toimplement to improve their
(00:44):
mental wellbeing?
And what are the three stepswomen need to take to enhance
their mental wellbeing?
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Welcome to her canvas, a podcast where we
discuss the topics that mattermost to women and help us find
the inspiration to live our bestlives.
I'm your host arranger today I'mjoined by Ellie was my Ropa.
Ellie is a meditation teacherwriter and my take coach.
She is the founder of bigsister, a personal development
(01:22):
brand, empowering purpose drivenwomen to live the adventurous,
joyful, abundant lives of theirdreams with COVID still raging
on women need mental healthsupport.
Now more than ever, I reportpublished in the journal
frontiers in global women'shealth found that sleep
problems, depression, andanxiety symptoms during the
(01:43):
pandemic are more common inwomen than in men.
Interestingly, one of thecontributing factors for these
mental health challenges hasbeen women's higher level of
empathy during the pandemic.
It turns out our inherent needto understand that emotions of
others and care for them carriesa heavier burden on us.
(02:03):
Ellie is here today to share howwe can reduce these challenges
to improve our mental wellbeingin the new year.
Welcome to the show, Allie,
Speaker 3 (02:13):
Thanks so much for having me glad to be
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Plated and thrilled to have you on today.
Maybe you can start by tellingus more about your background
and your journey to becoming amindset coach.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
I would love to so, Hey everyone.
My name is Ellie.
Thank you for the wonderfulintroduction jetty to, um, so I
am a mindset coach and I startedcoaching a few years ago,
probably around four years ago.
It started working with womenone-on-one and found that, you
know, I, I loved what I did.
A lot of women came to me withthe same basic difficulties, you
(02:49):
know, wanting to find balance intheir lives, wanting to go after
a big dream that they kind ofweren't letting themselves even
dream about.
Um, and so I to go and get somemore tools.
And so I got a coachingcertification a little over a
year ago and founded big sisterto kind of consolidate all of
the learnings I'd gotten overthe previous few years.
(03:11):
Um, but going back in time alittle bit, I was kind of, uh, I
had a funny childhood because mydad was really into personal
development.
And so he was always helping mework on my perspective, you
know, glass half full.
He had me read books like whomoved my cheese and the seven
habits of highly effectivepeople.
So, um, I would say my love ofpersonal development and mindset
(03:34):
started there.
I really saw, you know, ourattitudes are one of the only
things we can control and whatwe focus on.
And so I wanted to kind of usethat passion to help other,
especially other women, becauseI think, you know, as you said
in the introduction, we're just,we're very strong and very
(03:55):
powerful.
And also sometimes in society,those powers are used for the
benefit of only others.
And so, um, yeah, I'm reallyglad to be here and to help
people with some actionableadvice.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
That's great.
I love what you just said aboutthat.
Our attitude is all we cancontrol.
I mean, really that's so true.
And I also like what you saidabout how sometimes the powers
that we have.
Um, I, you know, we don't usethem to help ourselves.
(04:33):
We use them to help other peopleand in so important for us to
redirect some of that towardsourselves.
Um, so that's really exciting.
Um, so given what we know aboutthe mental health conditions
that women are dealing with,what would you say is the
process women need to implementto improve their mental
wellbeing?
Speaker 3 (04:54):
So I would recommend a three step process, very
simple, very basic.
Um, first I would say, you know,women need to get honest with
themselves about how they'refeeling, how they're doing.
Um, you know, it doesn't have tobe all positive all the time.
(05:18):
So, you know, really gettinghonest about, Hey, wow, I feel
like I'm in a rut.
I feel like I'm stuck on this orthat I'm not happy in this area
in my life.
I'm really stressed out.
And I feel out of control aboutthat.
I actually made a decision abouta year ago to just really limit
the amount of stress in my lifeand that's hard to do, but I
(05:39):
was, I just decided like, Idon't want to tolerate stress.
So how can I, how can I shiftthat after realizing I was so
stressed and had to work onboundaries with other people and
communication and all of that.
So step one, I would say gethonest and that can look like,
you know, writing down yourthoughts, doing a free write.
If you prefer talking, you cantalk into your voice notes app
(06:01):
on your phone or a recorder justto really see what's here.
Because the things that we don'tknow consciously, they're
probably operating on asubconscious level and we just
don't know that they'reinfluencing our behavior.
Secondly, what I would say is topractice being present with
(06:22):
yourself.
So similar to being honest, andlike you mentioned, I teach
meditation is just the practiceof being literally where your
feet are taking a deep breath.
This alone can help lower yourblood pressure can help reduce
your stress levels, just beingpresent, dropping down away from
(06:48):
the mind a little bit and intothe body as much as possible, as
much as feels good to you inthat moment can be really,
really, really helpful becauseoftentimes especially if we are,
you know, really intelligent,really driven achievement
oriented women who have a lot ofresponsibilities and a lot going
on, we'll often be really in ourheads and trying to figure stuff
(07:12):
out and worrying about thefuture or worrying about
whatever else there is.
And it can be really helpful tojust, just get present and let
go of some of those thoughts,even just for a moment.
And that can also look likegoing for a walk or something
like that.
And then the last piece I wouldsay is to use your tools.
(07:33):
So that can be meditation.
Maybe you love drinking tea.
Maybe you need to set somelimits on social media.
Like, you know, there's an hourin your day when you're not
looking at a screen at all.
Um, it could be something like,you know, other tools like
hypnotherapy or, or re orregular therapy, or you have a,
(07:56):
a life coach who you can talkabout these things with and work
on, um, accountability in asupportive environment.
Um, and I, I would just say withthe tools, it's really helpful
to know what they are whenyou're in a good place mentally,
when you feel like yourwellbeing is on lock so that
(08:17):
when you're having a bad day,you can kind of, even if you
pull out a list, you can belike, okay, let me try some of
these things.
Um, and one more I'll add to thetool belt is, um, that I
recommend and I do frequently on, um, big sister's Instagram and
other social media channels isEFT or emotional freedom
(08:38):
techniques.
And that's literally a sixminute process that can help you
feel a lot better in the momenttoo.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
That's great.
I like the six minutes everybodycan spend, you know, six
minutes.
One of the things you mentioned,uh, was being present, and I
know that it's easier said thandone, especially as you
mentioned that women, a lot oftimes, uh, juggling so many
things at the same time, andit's sometimes difficult to
(09:09):
quiet your mind.
So are there ways or tricks tohelp women quiet their mind,
like really get to that placewhere they feel that they're
present and in the moment andnot like thinking about a
million things at one time?
Speaker 3 (09:32):
Yeah.
Um, well, one thing I'drecommend that's really simple
is, and maybe many of us aredoing it right now is getting
out in nature, going for a walk.
Um, in terms of more specifics,I think box breathing is really
simple and useful, and it'sbasically like the Navy seals
(09:54):
use this technique to help quiettheir minds.
And you breathe in for fourseconds, hold for four seconds,
exhale for four seconds, holdfor four seconds.
And you can just repeat that.
And that's just a helpful anchorfor your attention.
And you'll also feel like thebreadth changes your physiology
(10:17):
a little bit.
And those are probably the maintwo I'd start with.
And the other thing I'll say isthat all of this is a moment by
moment practice.
Like in our society, we oftenwant a solution that just works.
That always works.
You know, I want to turn mythoughts off for the next hour.
(10:38):
And sometimes we really needthat.
Like if we're going to sleep inour minds are going crazy.
That's like, you know, that'sreally inconvenient and can be
bad for our health.
Um, but this kind of practice issomething you continue
practicing.
You continue focusing on yourwellbeing, you continue to do
this.
And that also means it can feellike you're doing it wrong.
(11:00):
It can feel like you're notdoing it enough because the
consistency isn't really there,but it's just the nature of the
practice.
And if you're trying it, I'mpretty sure you're doing it
right.
Which is what I say to mystudents a lot.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
That's great.
Um, is there like a perfect timeto meditate or can you meditate
at any time during the day?
Speaker 3 (11:29):
Um, you can definitely meditate at any time
during the day.
I'd say there are two levels tothat.
Um, in addition to you can justmeditate at any time.
One is when works best for you.
Like when is your mind kind ofmaybe a little bit more open, a
little bit quieter, maybe it'searly in the morning, but also
the second piece.
Where, when are you kind of inthe most control of your time,
(11:54):
you can meet meditation andmindfulness.
You can do that while you'rewashing the dishes.
You just focus on washing thedishes, sitting down and
meditating.
It's like, when, when are youleast likely to get disturbed?
You know, sometimes I like tomeditate in the morning because
at night I might be likewatching a movie or something
and I don't want to stop, or mypartner comes over and I don't
(12:14):
want to be like, okay, I got togo for 20 minutes.
Gotta meditate.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
That makes sense.
You know, finding the time whenyou can, you don't have too much
going on now, is it okay?
Should you, uh, you know,meditate when it's really quiet?
Is it important for it to bequiet or can you use props like
music?
(12:40):
Um, or is it just what, youknow, whatever, whatever helps
you do it.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
Yeah.
I love, I love what you said atthe end, whatever helps you do
it.
Um, it depends on the style ofmeditation.
If, like, for example, I teachwith chorus meditation and we
meditate to music.
So there's music playing thewhole time.
We're in the meditationpractice.
When I practice alone, I try tokeep things as quiet as
possible.
Like I'll turn off my spaceheater.
(13:10):
And that's just so that I can bestill, my mind can focus on the
few little stimuli here andthere.
Like maybe there's a dog barkingacross the street or something.
Um, so I like to keep it prettyquiet, but if you're in a noisy
spot, don't let that stop you.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
That's great advice.
Um, you mentioned cars,meditation, and I, that's really
interesting that the, the nameitself really jumps out at me.
Can you tell us a little bitabout that?
Speaker 3 (13:40):
Yeah.
So in chorus we breathe to thebeat of, we meditate and we do
some active breathing or breathwork, and we breathe to the beat
of the song that we're listeningto.
And often I will at the chorusof the song, which comes
multiple times in each song, Iwill sort of adjust the tempo.
(14:01):
We'll do something specialaround that to help guide the
student's attention.
And chorus is a great, it's justanything with, I think some kind
of focus point is really goodfor beginners to meditation.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
That's awesome.
I like the idea of meditating tothe beat of breathing to the
beat of something that in itselfwill focus.
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
Yeah.
And it's, it's fun to like,
Speaker 2 (14:29):
What kind of music do you use?
Speaker 3 (14:31):
I use music.
That's really good.
Um, I'm sure every teacher wouldsay that, but I actually like to
incorporate some like electropop, um, some favorites from the
pop charts, but not too many.
I like really rhythmic music.
I'm thinking of like my, some ofmy favorites, um, or like strong
(14:53):
female vocals, like BishopBriggs.
Hi, go III Mach.
I love my playlist.
So I just, I recommend if anyonewants to come join class, just
message me.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
No, maybe you can share your playlist after this.
Um, that's great.
Um, the other question I had,you talked about, uh, tools and
some of the tools that women canuse to help them meditate and,
and be present.
Are there any additional toolsother than the ones that you
(15:27):
talked about?
Speaker 3 (15:30):
I will give you one of my favorites actually, never
really talk about it.
It's very simple, but it can bepretty transformative.
Um, and the tool is to sit downwith a piece of paper and write
down everything that you'reafraid of, especially if you're
(15:52):
stressed out about something inparticular, what are you afraid
of in terms of all of thosethings and asking yourself
questions in general can bereally, really powerful things
like, you know, what do I want,why am I here?
Um, that those can sound reallyabstract, but if you put that
question to yourself and justlisten for what comes out first,
(16:13):
it can be really revealing.
And with that fear list, it'spretty, it's a relief to see
some of that stuff on paper andto see, okay, what can I
control?
What can I not control and kindof go from there.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
The idea of writing things down too.
I believe that when you writethings down, they, they become
more tangible and more real.
Um, and you know, writing downwhat you feel sometimes isn't
intimidating.
At least for me sometimes Idon't want to see it because if
(16:47):
I, I can say it to myself, it'sin my brain, but if I write it
down, it it's, I feel like itbecomes a reality.
And I think sometimes it's sopowerful to write it down
because it forces you to dealwith it and to address it.
I really liked that.
Thanks for sharing you, your,your favorite one.
(17:09):
Um, is there anything else thatyou want our listeners to take
away from this in terms ofreally improving their wellbeing
this new year?
Speaker 3 (17:21):
Um, I mean, overall, I would say you're doing great.
And, um, of course, if anyone'sfeeling particularly stuck on
something I'm really passionateabout this, I believe every
woman should feel like shedeserves all the best in the
world and feel good when shegets it.
(17:42):
So, um, I'm always available totalk to folks.
Um, and other than that, keeplistening to this podcast, I'd
say,
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Thank you.
That's great.
I love the, uh, you know,telling ourselves that we
deserve things.
I th I, I believe it because weplay so many roles, especially,
you know, like what caregiversand caretakers and we care so
much about, we have such a highlevel of empathy, um, that
(18:13):
sometimes we don't believe thatwe deserve to care for ourselves
and to feel a certain way and tobe a little bit selfish with our
time.
Um, and I think it's reallyimportant to feel like you
deserve certain things and, and,and to own it unapologetically.
(18:33):
So thanks for, thank you forthat.
It's good to hear it.
Um, and thank you.
Thank you so much for joiningus.
I'm so excited that you wereable to do this and to share
your awesome three-step process.
What I love about it is thatit's easy enough for anybody to
be able to implement it.
Um, and that's what we need.
(18:55):
I like easy stuff.
Um, and I think that with thatprocess, my listeners, and, you
know, anybody else out there whocomes across, uh, TA uh,
discussion today, um, we'll beable to take away something that
they can implement in theirlives and something that can
help them out.
(19:15):
So thank you.
Uh, now if our listeners, I'msure there are people who want
to learn more about what you do.
Um, how can they get in touchwith you?
Speaker 3 (19:24):
You can find us on Instagram at big sister co find
I'll be there as well.
Um, and then you can also visitthe website, big sister.co.
We've got some freebies on therethat you can check out things to
support your creativity, things,to support your confidence and
self-trust, um,
Speaker 2 (19:43):
Yeah, and I can vouch for it because I visited it
before.
Um, our chat today, I was onthere browsing around and you
have some really great stuff.
And I was really also impressedby how many people have featured
you in your work.
It's really awesome.
So thank you for what you'redoing for women and empowering
women.
(20:03):
It's so important for us to, toempower each other and to give
each other the tools we need toreally survive and thrive, not
just to survive, but to thriveas well.
So thanks again, Ellie.
Thank you for joining me
Speaker 3 (20:17):
So much.
Thanks for having me.
Bye everyone.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
You have the power to control your level of stress and
anxiety asking questions thatallow you to be honest with
yourself, practicing beingpresent, and in the moment, and
utilizing tools at your disposalto lower your blood pressure and
stress level, uh, threenecessary steps you can take to
improve your mental wellbeing inthe new year.
(20:41):
As Ellie said, you're doinggreat believe that you deserve
the best in the world and go getit.
That's all for our show today.
Be sure to subscribe to ourpodcast on Apple podcasts,
Spotify, Google podcasts, andPandora, want more resources to
improve your mental wellbeing.
Check out our health and fitnesssection on gap news.com.
(21:05):
Also, don't forget to connectwith our Facebook community at
gap Superman to continue thisconversation and many more along
the way until next time, staysafe and find the inspiration to
live your best.
Speaker 4 (21:31):
[inaudible].
The two most common mental health conditions for
women, uh, depression andanxiety.
This comes as no surprise to usbecause let's face it.
Women have a lot on their plate.
We're often juggling multipleroles, such as caregivers,
mothers, and partners, whileworking in running our
households top that with theknowledge that we're more likely
to live in poverty than men toexperience physical and sexual
(00:24):
abuse and to deal with theimpact of hormonal changes both
emotionally and physically.
It's no wonder our mentalwellbeing is compromised,
though.
There's no magical cure.
We can find ways to mitigatethese mental health challenges
by addressing two key questions.
What is a process women need toimplement to improve their
(00:44):
mental wellbeing?
And what are the three stepswomen need to take to enhance
their mental wellbeing?
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Welcome to her canvas, a podcast where we
discuss the topics that mattermost to women and help us find
the inspiration to live our bestlives.
I'm your host arranger today I'mjoined by Ellie was my Ropa.
Ellie is a meditation teacherwriter and my take coach.
She is the founder of bigsister, a personal development
(01:22):
brand, empowering purpose drivenwomen to live the adventurous,
joyful, abundant lives of theirdreams with COVID still raging
on women need mental healthsupport.
Now more than ever, I reportpublished in the journal
frontiers in global women'shealth found that sleep
problems, depression, andanxiety symptoms during the
(01:43):
pandemic are more common inwomen than in men.
Interestingly, one of thecontributing factors for these
mental health challenges hasbeen women's higher level of
empathy during the pandemic.
It turns out our inherent needto understand that emotions of
others and care for them carriesa heavier burden on us.
(02:03):
Ellie is here today to share howwe can reduce these challenges
to improve our mental wellbeingin the new year.
Welcome to the show, Allie,
Speaker 3 (02:13):
Thanks so much for having me glad to be
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Plated and thrilled to have you on today.
Maybe you can start by tellingus more about your background
and your journey to becoming amindset coach.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
I would love to so, Hey everyone.
My name is Ellie.
Thank you for the wonderfulintroduction jetty to, um, so I
am a mindset coach and I startedcoaching a few years ago,
probably around four years ago.
It started working with womenone-on-one and found that, you
know, I, I loved what I did.
A lot of women came to me withthe same basic difficulties, you
(02:49):
know, wanting to find balance intheir lives, wanting to go after
a big dream that they kind ofweren't letting themselves even
dream about.
Um, and so I to go and get somemore tools.
And so I got a coachingcertification a little over a
year ago and founded big sisterto kind of consolidate all of
the learnings I'd gotten overthe previous few years.
(03:11):
Um, but going back in time alittle bit, I was kind of, uh, I
had a funny childhood because mydad was really into personal
development.
And so he was always helping mework on my perspective, you
know, glass half full.
He had me read books like whomoved my cheese and the seven
habits of highly effectivepeople.
So, um, I would say my love ofpersonal development and mindset
(03:34):
started there.
I really saw, you know, ourattitudes are one of the only
things we can control and whatwe focus on.
And so I wanted to kind of usethat passion to help other,
especially other women, becauseI think, you know, as you said
in the introduction, we're just,we're very strong and very
(03:55):
powerful.
And also sometimes in society,those powers are used for the
benefit of only others.
And so, um, yeah, I'm reallyglad to be here and to help
people with some actionableadvice.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
That's great.
I love what you just said aboutthat.
Our attitude is all we cancontrol.
I mean, really that's so true.
And I also like what you saidabout how sometimes the powers
that we have.
Um, I, you know, we don't usethem to help ourselves.
(04:33):
We use them to help other peopleand in so important for us to
redirect some of that towardsourselves.
Um, so that's really exciting.
Um, so given what we know aboutthe mental health conditions
that women are dealing with,what would you say is the
process women need to implementto improve their mental
wellbeing?
Speaker 3 (04:54):
So I would recommend a three step process, very
simple, very basic.
Um, first I would say, you know,women need to get honest with
themselves about how they'refeeling, how they're doing.
Um, you know, it doesn't have tobe all positive all the time.
(05:18):
So, you know, really gettinghonest about, Hey, wow, I feel
like I'm in a rut.
I feel like I'm stuck on this orthat I'm not happy in this area
in my life.
I'm really stressed out.
And I feel out of control aboutthat.
I actually made a decision abouta year ago to just really limit
the amount of stress in my lifeand that's hard to do, but I
(05:39):
was, I just decided like, Idon't want to tolerate stress.
So how can I, how can I shiftthat after realizing I was so
stressed and had to work onboundaries with other people and
communication and all of that.
So step one, I would say gethonest and that can look like,
you know, writing down yourthoughts, doing a free write.
If you prefer talking, you cantalk into your voice notes app
(06:01):
on your phone or a recorder justto really see what's here.
Because the things that we don'tknow consciously, they're
probably operating on asubconscious level and we just
don't know that they'reinfluencing our behavior.
Secondly, what I would say is topractice being present with
(06:22):
yourself.
So similar to being honest, andlike you mentioned, I teach
meditation is just the practiceof being literally where your
feet are taking a deep breath.
This alone can help lower yourblood pressure can help reduce
your stress levels, just beingpresent, dropping down away from
(06:48):
the mind a little bit and intothe body as much as possible, as
much as feels good to you inthat moment can be really,
really, really helpful becauseoftentimes especially if we are,
you know, really intelligent,really driven achievement
oriented women who have a lot ofresponsibilities and a lot going
on, we'll often be really in ourheads and trying to figure stuff
(07:12):
out and worrying about thefuture or worrying about
whatever else there is.
And it can be really helpful tojust, just get present and let
go of some of those thoughts,even just for a moment.
And that can also look likegoing for a walk or something
like that.
And then the last piece I wouldsay is to use your tools.
(07:33):
So that can be meditation.
Maybe you love drinking tea.
Maybe you need to set somelimits on social media.
Like, you know, there's an hourin your day when you're not
looking at a screen at all.
Um, it could be something like,you know, other tools like
hypnotherapy or, or re orregular therapy, or you have a,
(07:56):
a life coach who you can talkabout these things with and work
on, um, accountability in asupportive environment.
Um, and I, I would just say withthe tools, it's really helpful
to know what they are whenyou're in a good place mentally,
when you feel like yourwellbeing is on lock so that
(08:17):
when you're having a bad day,you can kind of, even if you
pull out a list, you can belike, okay, let me try some of
these things.
Um, and one more I'll add to thetool belt is, um, that I
recommend and I do frequently on, um, big sister's Instagram and
other social media channels isEFT or emotional freedom
(08:38):
techniques.
And that's literally a sixminute process that can help you
feel a lot better in the momenttoo.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
That's great.
I like the six minutes everybodycan spend, you know, six
minutes.
One of the things you mentioned,uh, was being present, and I
know that it's easier said thandone, especially as you
mentioned that women, a lot oftimes, uh, juggling so many
things at the same time, andit's sometimes difficult to
(09:09):
quiet your mind.
So are there ways or tricks tohelp women quiet their mind,
like really get to that placewhere they feel that they're
present and in the moment andnot like thinking about a
million things at one time?
Speaker 3 (09:32):
Yeah.
Um, well, one thing I'drecommend that's really simple
is, and maybe many of us aredoing it right now is getting
out in nature, going for a walk.
Um, in terms of more specifics,I think box breathing is really
simple and useful, and it'sbasically like the Navy seals
(09:54):
use this technique to help quiettheir minds.
And you breathe in for fourseconds, hold for four seconds,
exhale for four seconds, holdfor four seconds.
And you can just repeat that.
And that's just a helpful anchorfor your attention.
And you'll also feel like thebreadth changes your physiology
(10:17):
a little bit.
And those are probably the maintwo I'd start with.
And the other thing I'll say isthat all of this is a moment by
moment practice.
Like in our society, we oftenwant a solution that just works.
That always works.
You know, I want to turn mythoughts off for the next hour.
(10:38):
And sometimes we really needthat.
Like if we're going to sleep inour minds are going crazy.
That's like, you know, that'sreally inconvenient and can be
bad for our health.
Um, but this kind of practice issomething you continue
practicing.
You continue focusing on yourwellbeing, you continue to do
this.
And that also means it can feellike you're doing it wrong.
(11:00):
It can feel like you're notdoing it enough because the
consistency isn't really there,but it's just the nature of the
practice.
And if you're trying it, I'mpretty sure you're doing it
right.
Which is what I say to mystudents a lot.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
That's great.
Um, is there like a perfect timeto meditate or can you meditate
at any time during the day?
Speaker 3 (11:29):
Um, you can definitely meditate at any time
during the day.
I'd say there are two levels tothat.
Um, in addition to you can justmeditate at any time.
One is when works best for you.
Like when is your mind kind ofmaybe a little bit more open, a
little bit quieter, maybe it'searly in the morning, but also
the second piece.
Where, when are you kind of inthe most control of your time,
(11:54):
you can meet meditation andmindfulness.
You can do that while you'rewashing the dishes.
You just focus on washing thedishes, sitting down and
meditating.
It's like, when, when are youleast likely to get disturbed?
You know, sometimes I like tomeditate in the morning because
at night I might be likewatching a movie or something
and I don't want to stop, or mypartner comes over and I don't
(12:14):
want to be like, okay, I got togo for 20 minutes.
Gotta meditate.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
That makes sense.
You know, finding the time whenyou can, you don't have too much
going on now, is it okay?
Should you, uh, you know,meditate when it's really quiet?
Is it important for it to bequiet or can you use props like
music?
(12:40):
Um, or is it just what, youknow, whatever, whatever helps
you do it.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
Yeah.
I love, I love what you said atthe end, whatever helps you do
it.
Um, it depends on the style ofmeditation.
If, like, for example, I teachwith chorus meditation and we
meditate to music.
So there's music playing thewhole time.
We're in the meditationpractice.
When I practice alone, I try tokeep things as quiet as
possible.
Like I'll turn off my spaceheater.
(13:10):
And that's just so that I can bestill, my mind can focus on the
few little stimuli here andthere.
Like maybe there's a dog barkingacross the street or something.
Um, so I like to keep it prettyquiet, but if you're in a noisy
spot, don't let that stop you.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
That's great advice.
Um, you mentioned cars,meditation, and I, that's really
interesting that the, the nameitself really jumps out at me.
Can you tell us a little bitabout that?
Speaker 3 (13:40):
Yeah.
So in chorus we breathe to thebeat of, we meditate and we do
some active breathing or breathwork, and we breathe to the beat
of the song that we're listeningto.
And often I will at the chorusof the song, which comes
multiple times in each song, Iwill sort of adjust the tempo.
(14:01):
We'll do something specialaround that to help guide the
student's attention.
And chorus is a great, it's justanything with, I think some kind
of focus point is really goodfor beginners to meditation.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
That's awesome.
I like the idea of meditating tothe beat of breathing to the
beat of something that in itselfwill focus.
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
Yeah.
And it's, it's fun to like,
Speaker 2 (14:29):
What kind of music do you use?
Speaker 3 (14:31):
I use music.
That's really good.
Um, I'm sure every teacher wouldsay that, but I actually like to
incorporate some like electropop, um, some favorites from the
pop charts, but not too many.
I like really rhythmic music.
I'm thinking of like my, some ofmy favorites, um, or like strong
(14:53):
female vocals, like BishopBriggs.
Hi, go III Mach.
I love my playlist.
So I just, I recommend if anyonewants to come join class, just
message me.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
No, maybe you can share your playlist after this.
Um, that's great.
Um, the other question I had,you talked about, uh, tools and
some of the tools that women canuse to help them meditate and,
and be present.
Are there any additional toolsother than the ones that you
(15:27):
talked about?
Speaker 3 (15:30):
I will give you one of my favorites actually, never
really talk about it.
It's very simple, but it can bepretty transformative.
Um, and the tool is to sit downwith a piece of paper and write
down everything that you'reafraid of, especially if you're
(15:52):
stressed out about something inparticular, what are you afraid
of in terms of all of thosethings and asking yourself
questions in general can bereally, really powerful things
like, you know, what do I want,why am I here?
Um, that those can sound reallyabstract, but if you put that
question to yourself and justlisten for what comes out first,
(16:13):
it can be really revealing.
And with that fear list, it'spretty, it's a relief to see
some of that stuff on paper andto see, okay, what can I
control?
What can I not control and kindof go from there.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
The idea of writing things down too.
I believe that when you writethings down, they, they become
more tangible and more real.
Um, and you know, writing downwhat you feel sometimes isn't
intimidating.
At least for me sometimes Idon't want to see it because if
(16:47):
I, I can say it to myself, it'sin my brain, but if I write it
down, it it's, I feel like itbecomes a reality.
And I think sometimes it's sopowerful to write it down
because it forces you to dealwith it and to address it.
I really liked that.
Thanks for sharing you, your,your favorite one.
(17:09):
Um, is there anything else thatyou want our listeners to take
away from this in terms ofreally improving their wellbeing
this new year?
Speaker 3 (17:21):
Um, I mean, overall, I would say you're doing great.
And, um, of course, if anyone'sfeeling particularly stuck on
something I'm really passionateabout this, I believe every
woman should feel like shedeserves all the best in the
world and feel good when shegets it.
(17:42):
So, um, I'm always available totalk to folks.
Um, and other than that, keeplistening to this podcast, I'd
say,
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Thank you.
That's great.
I love the, uh, you know,telling ourselves that we
deserve things.
I th I, I believe it because weplay so many roles, especially,
you know, like what caregiversand caretakers and we care so
much about, we have such a highlevel of empathy, um, that
(18:13):
sometimes we don't believe thatwe deserve to care for ourselves
and to feel a certain way and tobe a little bit selfish with our
time.
Um, and I think it's reallyimportant to feel like you
deserve certain things and, and,and to own it unapologetically.
(18:33):
So thanks for, thank you forthat.
It's good to hear it.
Um, and thank you.
Thank you so much for joiningus.
I'm so excited that you wereable to do this and to share
your awesome three-step process.
What I love about it is thatit's easy enough for anybody to
be able to implement it.
Um, and that's what we need.
(18:55):
I like easy stuff.
Um, and I think that with thatprocess, my listeners, and, you
know, anybody else out there whocomes across, uh, TA uh,
discussion today, um, we'll beable to take away something that
they can implement in theirlives and something that can
help them out.
(19:15):
So thank you.
Uh, now if our listeners, I'msure there are people who want
to learn more about what you do.
Um, how can they get in touchwith you?
Speaker 3 (19:24):
You can find us on Instagram at big sister co find
I'll be there as well.
Um, and then you can also visitthe website, big sister.co.
We've got some freebies on therethat you can check out things to
support your creativity, things,to support your confidence and
self-trust, um,
Speaker 2 (19:43):
Yeah, and I can vouch for it because I visited it
before.
Um, our chat today, I was onthere browsing around and you
have some really great stuff.
And I was really also impressedby how many people have featured
you in your work.
It's really awesome.
So thank you for what you'redoing for women and empowering
women.
(20:03):
It's so important for us to, toempower each other and to give
each other the tools we need toreally survive and thrive, not
just to survive, but to thriveas well.
So thanks again, Ellie.
Thank you for joining me
Speaker 3 (20:17):
So much.
Thanks for having me.
Bye everyone.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
You have the power to control your level of stress and
anxiety asking questions thatallow you to be honest with
yourself, practicing beingpresent, and in the moment, and
utilizing tools at your disposalto lower your blood pressure and
stress level, uh, threenecessary steps you can take to
improve your mental wellbeing inthe new year.
(20:41):
As Ellie said, you're doinggreat believe that you deserve
the best in the world and go getit.
That's all for our show today.
Be sure to subscribe to ourpodcast on Apple podcasts,
Spotify, Google podcasts, andPandora, want more resources to
improve your mental wellbeing.
Check out our health and fitnesssection on gap news.com.
(21:05):
Also, don't forget to connectwith our Facebook community at
gap Superman to continue thisconversation and many more along
the way until next time, staysafe and find the inspiration to
live your best.
Speaker 4 (21:31):
[inaudible].
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